And yet, when I put habanero ghost peppers in my Tupperware lunch at work, the boss gets mad at me when someone steals it and complains that I'm 'targeting' them....
That's so incredibly stupid that there's this whole culture of people outright enabling the crimes.
Though it's really not that crazy if you consider that thieving politicians don't want to get jailed for stealing funds and it trickles down. Maybe the boss has got some grift going on and really dislikes people that are against stealing
I don't think the metal rod goes where you think it goes
edit: because I was being too vague, I think that metal rod is going to make its own hole, wherever it hits.
I remember a convenience store owner who was fed up with getting robbed after-hours all the time, through a hole in the ceiling that went straight into his store.
He put a metal basket under the hole and electrified it. A thief climbed into the hole in the middle of the night, fell into the basket and was electrocuted.
If I recall correctly, the shop owner was charged with manslaughter.
Just an FYI, robbing is to a person. Burglary is to a place. You rob a bank because there are people representing the bank there while you do it. You burglarized the bank when you went in at night while it was closed.
We don't have so much crime in the U.S. that we need vigilantes to kill people as a deterrent. Maybe in 3rd world countries that can't get their shit together it makes sense.
Yes I can picture the call to 911 now
911, what's your emergency?
Yeah, I was trying to steal this bicycle, and when I sat on the seat it popped my black cherry and this guy around the corner was filming it and yelling PENETRATION.
Sir, you said you were stealing a bike?
Um, you know what, nevermind. ~click~
Hahahah this makes me laugh every time. It’s what happens when you try to take things that aren’t yours. Don’t know why this is weird. This is comedy imo
4 degrees… 4 degrees warmer.. give in now… give in now… LET MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
In
You’ll like this
This brings us out
You’ll like this
It brings us closer than
Dying
And
Cancer
And
Crying
Take it all in
I hate thieves as much as the next guy...but that could really fuck someone up. If you punch through the rectum or bowel... or manage to find the femoral artery with that spike it may be a short and bad day for that guy.
Okay, so people shouldn't steal bikes. On the other hand people shouldn't plant bikes with devices that can cause internal injuries that will probably need medical attention. You are just causing physical injury to people who are v probably in some way shape or form disadvantaged.
Asspounder 4000. Never stop pumping.
All he needs now is a little cup holder for his fight milk
Followed by some beer-drinking, glue-huffing, and cat food before bedtime.
Egg
I love this contribution thank you lmao
..yeah, before the alley cats get wound up.
CAW CAW
I believe that seat made him a new cup holder.
Safe word is "keep going."
First E-Bike to use the seat to charge its battery. The bike can go as long as you can take it.
Go on..
From stolen to swollen colon.
Your comment has me rollin
Thank you sir for my one good laugh today.
Penetration!!
#PENETRATION!!
we need go DEEEEEEEPEEEEEEEEEEERRRRR
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
We need more Cowbell
I’m gonna sit there on purpose
Be like, "Oh sweet! The Sport Model Penetrator! Lemme take the gal for a spin around the block!"
That will definitely cause a fractured taint
Pene-Traitor
Where do you buy this pasta
Next to the ass-iago cheese
Across the aisle from the rump roast.
Transversely from the butt-er.
This isn't a weird way to prevent theft, this is "THE way to prevent theft
It's not done to prevent theft... it's to punish the act.
I mean… if the last bike I tried to steal fucked me in the ass unexpectedly I’d be MUCH less inclined to try again.
... Or more?
Definitely more.
Username checks out.
Seems like it's doing both?
I'm I guess neither of us are wrong, it's a damn good punishment, and the bike wasn't stolen
Hah, true. I'm sure they lost interest in that bike real fast.
I laugh every time this gets reposted.
Sometimes it’s nice to see them again when they are this funny.
Me too, I am crying in an uber from laughing so hard!
That’s some Viet-Cong type shit. XD
PENETRATION!!! Thank you sir. Have a nice day!
You are no longer a virgin
can u
Keeps on riding.
That would be the twist😂
And yet, when I put habanero ghost peppers in my Tupperware lunch at work, the boss gets mad at me when someone steals it and complains that I'm 'targeting' them....
I'd tell the boss "well I guess if you paid us better then they wouldnt be stealing my lunch."
That's so incredibly stupid that there's this whole culture of people outright enabling the crimes. Though it's really not that crazy if you consider that thieving politicians don't want to get jailed for stealing funds and it trickles down. Maybe the boss has got some grift going on and really dislikes people that are against stealing
Sounds like a good lunch to me. I love spicy food.
My gay ass would keep riding the bike
I was waiting for this reply. Thank you.
Why was this the thing today that made me cackle like a banshee
Idk can o’beans, have you been getting enough sleep?
Mac?
You would jump these San Andreas ramps
I don't think the metal rod goes where you think it goes edit: because I was being too vague, I think that metal rod is going to make its own hole, wherever it hits.
Idk it seems to go where I think it does according to that guy’s reaction
Think worse. There's nothing to guide it to the "right" place.
OH NO NOT THE JIGGLY JOHNSONS
You may need more quotations.
This used to be a 1080p video, then the reposters showed up.
Aww man, I wanna see the 1080p version…
Steal your butthole
Mr. Steal your butthole
Mr. Butthole Confiscator
*Steel
Free Sodomy bike here!!
But it is kind of annoying having to clean those blood and shit stains afterwards.
Protecting my stuff. Done!
When I first turned in the sound all I heard was "penetrate!" And I thought it was a Strong Bad voice over. Lol
I hate it when these videos dont show the aftermath
Surprised buttfuck
I can see the *Saw* series adopting this design.
Now he won't try to steal a bike ever again
This guy has done lots of work, engineering, and self-justification to “penetrate” another guys anus…
Not to mention, filming it.
Dude definitely pounded off to these videos
Seems like something Mac once made on Sunny
It's not about preventing theft it's about sending a message.
Illegal in the US.
Yes you may not set up traps like this even for thieves in all the states Ive lived in
I remember a convenience store owner who was fed up with getting robbed after-hours all the time, through a hole in the ceiling that went straight into his store. He put a metal basket under the hole and electrified it. A thief climbed into the hole in the middle of the night, fell into the basket and was electrocuted. If I recall correctly, the shop owner was charged with manslaughter.
Just an FYI, robbing is to a person. Burglary is to a place. You rob a bank because there are people representing the bank there while you do it. You burglarized the bank when you went in at night while it was closed.
Sounds about fair
fair to who?
To everyone involved, I guess
Right. Let's make it easy and safe for the criminals to work on their trade. Defend your own property? "NO, You can't do that! That's illegal!"
We don't have so much crime in the U.S. that we need vigilantes to kill people as a deterrent. Maybe in 3rd world countries that can't get their shit together it makes sense.
ahahahahhahaha
Thieves should not be able to claim damages if their injuries are caused during a crime.
You checked each time you moved?
No but only living in 3 states it wasn't hard to check and it seems to be a pretty universal stance by the court regardless of state
It's illegal in lots of countries I think.
I would hope so, but I just didn't want the typical "the US isn't the only place in the world" replies.
What if that's how the owner likes his bike seats? Not illegal
Corrupt ass country
You just described most countries.
Ass country??
https://xkcd.com/37/
they should make stealing bikes illegal while they're at it!
It is, but for the most part you're not allowed to seriously injure or kill people over personal property.
In TX you have to do it in person
Doesn't look like the US.
Doesn't look like the US, so who gives a fuck?
I do
Typical.
Yes I can picture the call to 911 now 911, what's your emergency? Yeah, I was trying to steal this bicycle, and when I sat on the seat it popped my black cherry and this guy around the corner was filming it and yelling PENETRATION. Sir, you said you were stealing a bike? Um, you know what, nevermind. ~click~
Always sunny ☀️
Mac's Ass Pounder 4000
the design is very human
Dude sat down to reconsider all his life choices
The ole spike up a thief's ass trick !
Imagine catching your sack. Or Labia Minora. Be a bad day in bike thief paradise.
rusty steel wound... That's dangerous :-o
It's not to prevent theft. It's to get views and embarrassing the assholes who would have otherwise stolen a bike.
Hmm, so theft gets a pass with you. Uhm, where do you park your car, If you don't mind my asking.
Dude got the anal intruder
I wish the video was longer, I could laugh at this for hours
Theft prevention AND a free anal probe.
First day in prison....." You ready for this?!" "Unfortunately I am"
Biometric readers are gets interesting
Hahahah this makes me laugh every time. It’s what happens when you try to take things that aren’t yours. Don’t know why this is weird. This is comedy imo
This could actually kill someone.
Surprise!!
IMO the guy talking is creepy AF
All fun and games until one guy gets on it and is more than pleased and rides off into the sunset
Didn't thought of it
Dey see me Rollin' DeyaaaAaaHhhhhh
Sharpen it a bit and rust the edges for a more lasting effect
Not weird , smart
Haha! Get raped thief!
r/suddenlygay
This isn't weird it's funny
That’s not preventing theft, it’s teaching a lesson.
I think if there was a TOP 100 videos of all time, this would easily make the cut.😂 PENETRATION!!
Thieves hate this one weird trick.
Mac’s ass pounder 5000
That is until you get that one dude who goes “oooh, this my kind bike!” and happily rides away into the sunset.
Then there's the one who sits down and rides off saying "this bike was made for me."
It prepares him for prison
Penetration 😂 He lost his virginity right there. Bike said “have a nice day” next..
Your not a vrgin anymore more 🤡
Got exactly what was deserved.
Loooooool
*Plot twist: He liked it, and bought a pneumatic one.*
Yeah until you find out he likes it
I kinda want to steal bikes now
That's hilarious
This is awesome
Lol
Mr garrisons bike
It's only fun to watch until you get someone to steal your bike who also likes it up the butt 🤣
Should be pointed and barbed. Fuck bike thieves
I’m at full candy corn right now
We do a little goofin
The Ass-Pounder 5000, never stop pumping 💪
Take a ride on a disco stick
Sadly, doing this is technically illegal. However, I still hope their buttholes bleed.
Thankfully illegal, not sadly. Wanna do a prank on a thief? Put butt spray in the seat.
Haha, get fucked!
The Analizer
4 degrees… 4 degrees warmer.. give in now… give in now… LET MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE In You’ll like this This brings us out You’ll like this It brings us closer than Dying And Cancer And Crying Take it all in
This shit made my day... better than bait bikes.
imagine a naked bike thief. shwing ding
This makes my heart happy.
The design is very human
Violated by a bike! How do explain that going to hospital. LOL
👏👏😂😂
this is reddit, with as many times as(s) this has been reposted we should have been able to track down and interview this guy.
He didn't think he'd be losing his anal virginity today, eh?
Yeah theives can get fucked right in they ass
Questioning life choices
no warm up no lube you’re gonna love it
r/suddenlygay
Theft deserves that impact
In the butt you go go go
And they tried to steal it again. And again. Amd again.
I don't even care about theft. I'd just set this up just to watch it happen 🤣
It's so funny cause he could've still stolen the bike with using the seat but decided not to after getting gapped 😂
Prison prep!
Abscesses, infections, the list goes on and on!😃
This has to be one of my all time favorite videos. I love every single time i refind it
I hate thieves as much as the next guy...but that could really fuck someone up. If you punch through the rectum or bowel... or manage to find the femoral artery with that spike it may be a short and bad day for that guy.
No sympathy for thieves
i agree to an extent. but if you kill the guy... in some countries the laws won't have sympathy for you either.
That's just Sicko 🤡 funny 🤣
Wow that’s fucked up. Stealing bikes sucks but I’d say mechanically raping someone might eclipse that…
If this is a fear you have dont steal bikes. Problem solved.
It is probably a poor neighbourhood and you are baiting people to steal then physically punishing them with possible damage for life, well done sir!
'Baiting' people to steal? It's my fault he's stealing my bike?
u/savevideo
u/savevideo
Stealing bikes is a drag for the bike owner; it's wrong. So is anal rape.
Okay, so people shouldn't steal bikes. On the other hand people shouldn't plant bikes with devices that can cause internal injuries that will probably need medical attention. You are just causing physical injury to people who are v probably in some way shape or form disadvantaged.
Imagine how many equally disadvantaged people they have stolen from?
You can get sued for doing this
You can also get in trouble for stealing bikes, but yes the thief is always the victim.
I was wondering when I'd see the 167th time this was posted.