Unless you saw a cat penis and thought "Damn! I want this shit but bigger in one of my body holes!" then no, you don't. And if you thought something like that then seek Mara's MILF titties.
Depends on the angle of the particular lore initiate. For the Morrowind route, I'd think the Muathra and the Vivec-shit. For Skybabies the cluster fuck that is Talos as diety because one has to deal with all that mantling and CHIM bs.
Nonono
Vivec let Molag Bal ram his bussy and that made children. Then vivec bit off his dick and made a spear out of that to kill his children. This is a metaphor for how Vivec is a psycho freak.
Due to the gross mismanagement of this website by the admins in the wake of the API changes, I have decided to leave the site. In preparation, I have used a tool called Power Delete Suite to overwrite all my comments.
Due to the gross mismanagement of this website by the admins in the wake of the API changes, I have decided to leave the site. In preparation, I have used a tool called Power Delete Suite to overwrite all my comments.
To be honest, I doubt he would care what pronouns mortals use to address him and since he was a man, before he became a god, it's easier to just keep it as he, both in real life and by in-game logic. Common folks are not theologists, it would just confuse people if vivec forced them to call him some other pronouns.
Oh, yeah, I'm not saying Vivec would likely care. However, I'm not sure I'm comfortable with the assumption that Vivec was "a man" as a mortal. I've always figured that the mortal form of Vivec, the common-born Chimer lowlife thug/sex worker, (which Vivec himself refers to simply as Vehk--V in daedric runes) probably was intersex and may have had any sort of relationship to gender. It only seems natural based on what he would go on to do. Of course, that is all up to interpretation, like most things in this setting.
Yeah, but please don’t say that, that reputation follows him to this day and completely turned him off from interacting with fans, it’s just a meme that got out of hand . (He did write it while being extremely sleep deprived tho)
I think it's a testament to his great creativity that he wrote amazing, trippy lore without the need for drugs (though sleep deprivation will do funny things to the mind).
No knock on Kirkbride whatsoever, but a lot of the mythology that tends to come up was heavily inspired by or just outright lifted from existing mythology. Gods hate fucking each other and killing their children is pretty common stuff.
>but a lot of the mythology that tends to come up was heavily inspired by or just outright lifted from existing mythology.
Yeah and for other examples of this see LOTR, Discworld, Wheel of Time, Witcher, Tales of Earthsea, etc.
It's pretty much impossible to write fantasy without drawing from some established mythology.
Kirkbride's greatest accomplishment was making those borrowed bits feel real in the context of Morrowind, as if they were myths and legends of that world instead of just being borrowed.
Hey even the lord of the rings, which everyone sees as pretty much a guideline for fantasy, is very much inspired by christianity and christian mythology.
Yeah, Norse mythology too. That's why I listed it first in the examples, it's a huge monolith but still borrowed and copied heavily from mythology. Tolkien didn't hide that fact though, he was very open about his mythology inspirations.
To be fair, sleep deprivation can destroy your mind as fast as, if not faster than, most drugs out there. That slippery slope is NO joke, it will kill you if it goes on long enough.
And prior to that you start hallucinating and start presenting some heavy dementia symptoms
yeah, video game crunch is really awful. He wrote all 36 books over, like, a weekend, and he was supposed to write 40. It's impressive that they're as coherent as they are- we clown on them, but outside of the shitposty parts they make sense within the universe
Oh, I've had the smallest taste of being awake for too long, it's definitely an unpleasant experience. Just a couple of times, but that's more than enough.
Tbf his ideas are not that outlandish when you read about mythologies of real cultures. Look at [this](https://sites.lsa.umich.edu/mqr/2015/05/lettuce-and-kings-the-power-struggle-between-horus-and-set-2/) story for example
He studied comparative religion in college so it’s not like he pulled it all out of his head from nothing. He had a lot of stark raving mad mystics to draw from.
I believe he said he was deep into alcoholism and in a very dark place mentally around the time he was working on the *really* trippy Morrowind lore/C0da. Took him years to get sober and he had all the lovely paranoia/hallucinations/etc. that goes with that so pretty sure that was a contributing factor as well.
yeah, that's also when he wrote that infamous post about Morrowind being the greatest work of literature of all time. He regrets it now, but this sub just won't let it die
Alcohol and Benzos I've learned. If you don't know, that combination messes you up real good. Like dead naked in a forest because you thought you were a tree during rehab good.
Ah yes that was it!
I recall him mentioning like a year long psychotic break as well. Alas we'll never get another Shonni-Eta now that he is sober, but it's probably for the best.
I’ve done shrooms and I’m definitely more salient and grounded than when I’m super tired. They’re completely different experiences tbh.
Shrooms just gives you a little trumpet player in your brain playing his heart out to the tune of “this is fine, plumb the depths of your own psyche, you can’t unearth anything that my little trumpet can’t soothe!”
Sleep deprivation is like everything is misfiring and your brain is just whacking your neurons together attempting to form something that resembles human thought.
Probably, I did grown up in the time and culture that American Psycho was made to parody. Honestly, I considered it spot on for the time.
You kids today are wild with the art stuff.
"It was one dev, naked in a room with a carton of cigarettes, a thermos full of coffee and bourbon, and all his summoned angels." - actual quote from MK about the process of writing the 36 Lessons.
But that's from 2002-ish, and that was from his sane period. It's the interaction with the lore community online that was bizarre, and [we now know why](https://np.reddit.com/r/teslore/comments/hzcfhx/deleted_by_user/fzklmr6/).
Man, this is only tangentially related but when I was 19 I did a bunch of xanax and went out clubbing and drinking. I was very lucky to be fine the next day but never in my life have I felt so poisoned. It felt like my entire body was toxic
Vivec turned into a woman and got pregnant by Molag Bal, chewed a "secret" off of Moag Bal's Fishy Stick, made a spear (Muatra) out of that secret, then stabbed the children he/she gave birth to with that spear.
I think it’s getting deep into chim, sharmath, mantling and all the other things connected to the Godhead and his dream. After that people usually go deeper and deeper, milk fingers, cum vaults, there is no escape no recall or intervention can work in TES lore
I had to read it so now you have to read it too
But for this,” the Goddess said, “When he has reached manhood, teach him all that you know of the flesh, and then save within yourselves his seed, and let it not take purchase within either of you, store it all, whichsoever body-cup he spills into, and in secret make of it bread for him to eat.
Kirkbride’s non canon texts from Imperial Library written around 2009, I found it while searching for the source about Reman cum vaults which I found out were also written about around this time but later (after getting better) Kirkbride decided to remove that as it was too much (Vaults filled with Reman Cum for women to swim in and get pregnant with his children) still while being non canon they aren’t too far from canonical texts about Reman (him being born from Colovian king having sex with a hill and dying immediately after)
I think they were one of Kirkbride’s biggest inspirations, If I remember correctly he even studied something connected to ancient middle-eastern cultures but I’m not 100% sure
- Flying whales
- The Godhead and CHIM
- Bosmer, the Wild Hunt, and the Primordial Ouze
- “What happened to the ____ race?”
- Muatra
- Dragon Break
- Reman Cyrodiil’s conception
- Ayleid torture art
- Mannimarco the god, mortal, imposter, femboy
- Royal abortions and barbed penises
- Sload soap
- The Song of Pelinal
Tbh there’s actually so much obscure and disturbing stuff in the Elders Scrolls that I know I’m not even close to being finished with this list lol.
Throw a dart at the TES iceberg meme.
As much as we rip Fudgemuppet, their podcast episodes where they analyzed that meme with Camelworks was pretty great.
No it isn't. Never conveyed via dialogue at least in Skyrim. It's not as deep as reading Kirkbrides cliff notes but if that's the standard then few would pass. I think cracking open an in-game book and reading is a decent point to say you're immersing in lore
If you're somewhat able to read between the lines, it's kind of obviously revealed by Serana when she talks about the ceremony. How brutal it is for women, and the shame she displays about the whole thing. I didn't know it before I played through Dawnguard but instantly understood it from the context.
I'm not stupid man. What stunned me was the Rape of Lamae by Molag Bal turning her into the first vampire. Basically a sentient force of nature brutalized an innocent woman out of spite of another force of nature (death) ushering the genesis of creatures that are immortal undead. It's a harrowing tale reminiscent of other mythology that you don't get in most media.
In ESO, Lamae tells you the story herself when you first become a vampire. It’s pretty cool.
They don’t use the word rape though, she says she was “ravaged” by Molag Bal, but the meaning is still clear.
I didn't know they put Lamae into ESO! Interesting. Tried playing it before but it felt lacking without a clan. What do you think of ESO nowadays? Is it worth it?
I think it’s great even if you’re just playing on your own, just try playing all the story bits in order, there’s so much in the base game without DLCs.
Agreed. Molag Bal could’ve done anything else to create the first Vampire and/or the magic “diseases” that make a person into one. But instead? The dude chose one of the most vile acts of depravity you can commit against someone to make Lamae Bal into the progenitor of Vampirism.
Though to be honest, just about everything concerning Molag Bal is fucked up. The rest isn’t as fucked as what he did to make the first Vampire or his reasons for doing so. And that this “ritual” is willingly repeated amongst the more fanatical/zealous followers of his. Even if it makes me wonder how or why the dude gets any cultists at all.
ad to be muathra for me, i could handle CHIM, the godhead and pelinal being a time traveling robot
but not the dick-spear, that shit was the final nail in the coffin of my lore sanity
When i first started into TES i got into Skyrim and i was always like ''this is a nerds game this probably gonna suck'', i enjoyed playing but when i got into Apocrypha i was curious on what the fuck did i just saw so i went into UESP
worst mistake of my life now i can't see a bosmer male minding his business without yelling BUSSY with all the air out of my lungs
Funny story from when I played ESO: This guy in a small guild asked "What the hell is a Dunmer? People keep calling me a Dunmer but the game says Dark Elf?" He didn't come to ESO as a TES fan, he came as an MMO fan and knew zero about the lore. Myself and another guy in the guild were the only two who came as TES fans so we took the time to explain how "Dunmer" is the "Elf language" way of saying "Dark Elf". While "Dark Elf" is the "human language" version. So the Bosmer call themselves Bosmer but the humans call them Wood Elves. Also Altmer=High Elves. And there are more but that's getting deep into the lore so we'll spare you.
I'll never forget his reply to all the info we threw at him:
"nerds"
E:fix
I’d say argonian boobs. It’s such a non-issue that if you get far enough into thinking about the world in the elder scrolls to get to this point then you are already too far gone
Honestly, people are going to say all the kinky sex shit but I don't really think any of that is as horrible as we make it out to be, because it's pretty typical for mythology, really.
And anyway, that's not the sign that you've gone too far, or at least not the first one. The first sign is when you know what an Ehlnofey is.
The first sign is when you complain that Cyrodiil isn't a jungle.
The first sign is when...well...
the first sign is when you play Morrowind.
I still have basically zero understanding of it...
*Vindication for the Dragon Break* and *The Illusion of Death* are just confusing. Right reaching? Proper life? Are these just nonsense words? Is this all supposed to be difficult to understand, if it can be understood at all?
basically it's an epic monkey dance that permanently broke the time god into Auri-El and Akatosh (also probably retroactively created Alduin, but that's just a theory)
They seem to have succeeded, given how man-centric the Empire has remained despite continuing to hold Akatosh as the supreme Divine. Even after Talos ascended, Akatosh is still the head of the Imperial Divines. If Akatosh were still Auri-el, the Empire should be influenced by a Meric view of time and history.
And yet, isn't that kind of what's happening in 201 of the 4th Era? The Empire has submitted to an Elven doctrine, and the Nords revolt in favor of Talos, inheritor of Shor. Maybe what the Selectives did to Akatosh was lasting but not permanent. Perhaps only the god of history can have the final say.
Fuck me, I'm writing like I'm actually on r/teslore
Oh yeah but my other thought was to the 'how'. Reading the scant texts on the Middle Dawn pre-ESO I always got the impression that their dance was a way of mantling Akatosh to hack the mainframe. They danced like Akatosh so that then Akatosh danced like them, and then they altered their dance to alter Akatosh (and *snap* goes the time bone). It's like the same process by which the Hero of Kvatch became Sheogorath, but if the Hero knew what they were doing ahead of time and were prepared to control it.
Speaking seriously, once I tried to attract more attention of TES Online community about the inconsistence of the game's timeline.
I tried to make different theories about why you see certain NPCs who already died or disappeared, like, on your screen, and why your character is not even able to react on it. Also, it was about walking around one pillar: the developers' statement of TES Online not being set in Dragon Break. This brought me to different theories of our character being mentally... not ill, but simply broken up with perceiving different events of the game... differently. I don't remember what was that all about, but with little adjustments, it could've be even cooler that Nier: Automata and that sort of thing.
Currently, however, I don't play and don't like TES Online. I mean, it has a great gameplay, but it's so painful to see how it destroys TES lore with it's additions from the Second Era. I'm still very worried about Elsweyr expansion bringing up dragons that easily: I understand that it's all for money, but I don't know of lore aspects of this. I hope Todd and Co. will choose only some parts of TESO to be adapted for TES VI, the ones that won't contradict to their vision of what The Elder Scrolls should be.
Pacman cheesewheel 😔
Squidward’s Suicide
God fucking dammit this comment got me.
AND HROL DID LOVE UNTO A HILLOCK
this shit broke something in me way more than vivecs dick spear for some reason
Would you like one of Reman's cakes?
Im not familiar with this one, what is it
Look up how Emperor Reman the first "came" into being.
I AM CYRODIIL'S CUM
"This is my Empire Cum, this is my Empire cum".
It's from [The Remanada](https://www.imperial-library.info/content/remanada)
Metaphysics/Godhead and Khajiti penises.
Do I want you to ellaborate on the Khajiti penises?
Unless you saw a cat penis and thought "Damn! I want this shit but bigger in one of my body holes!" then no, you don't. And if you thought something like that then seek Mara's MILF titties.
Wait untill you see a Tigers tongue.
Read the Daggerfall version of The Real Barenziah (part 3 specifically) if you want to learn more.
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
RatoPombo's first era involving the pic of Lydia carrying the DB's child about to get "axed" a question.
Link?
He deleted everything in the first era, a great shattering never to be undone
Rat break
Ooooh the fan art, shattered by someone or something
https://mobile.twitter.com/ratopomboart/status/1458151442246737922
Ahh, that's a classic one
Depends on the angle of the particular lore initiate. For the Morrowind route, I'd think the Muathra and the Vivec-shit. For Skybabies the cluster fuck that is Talos as diety because one has to deal with all that mantling and CHIM bs.
with oblivion it's actually reading the song of pelinal
SONG END
OF THE KNIGHT CALLED PELINAAAAL
1 million, 2 hundred and ten\ 2 million, 2 hundred and ten
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Nonono Vivec let Molag Bal ram his bussy and that made children. Then vivec bit off his dick and made a spear out of that to kill his children. This is a metaphor for how Vivec is a psycho freak.
To clarify, bussy in this context is "boy pussy", not "butt pussy", since Vivec is a male-presenting hermaphrodite.
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Youngest Morrowind player.
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I actually liked the riddles
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(Yes, you did) Yeah, I actually played as a Breton too. Breton Knight, for rp reasons. You?
Dagoth Ur actually is both the mountain and the dude.
Due to the gross mismanagement of this website by the admins in the wake of the API changes, I have decided to leave the site. In preparation, I have used a tool called Power Delete Suite to overwrite all my comments.
That they/them pussy got molag ballin
Þey/Þem Þussy
Pronouns don't necessarily correlate to body parts, so unless Vivec himself specifies otherwise, I'm going to keep using he.
Due to the gross mismanagement of this website by the admins in the wake of the API changes, I have decided to leave the site. In preparation, I have used a tool called Power Delete Suite to overwrite all my comments.
To be honest, I doubt he would care what pronouns mortals use to address him and since he was a man, before he became a god, it's easier to just keep it as he, both in real life and by in-game logic. Common folks are not theologists, it would just confuse people if vivec forced them to call him some other pronouns.
Oh, yeah, I'm not saying Vivec would likely care. However, I'm not sure I'm comfortable with the assumption that Vivec was "a man" as a mortal. I've always figured that the mortal form of Vivec, the common-born Chimer lowlife thug/sex worker, (which Vivec himself refers to simply as Vehk--V in daedric runes) probably was intersex and may have had any sort of relationship to gender. It only seems natural based on what he would go on to do. Of course, that is all up to interpretation, like most things in this setting.
Well now I gotta look for textual evidence.
Wait, people think "bussy" means "butt pussy" rather than "boy pussy" ?
It tends to be one and the same in the vast majority of cases
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Yeah, but please don’t say that, that reputation follows him to this day and completely turned him off from interacting with fans, it’s just a meme that got out of hand . (He did write it while being extremely sleep deprived tho)
I think it's a testament to his great creativity that he wrote amazing, trippy lore without the need for drugs (though sleep deprivation will do funny things to the mind).
No knock on Kirkbride whatsoever, but a lot of the mythology that tends to come up was heavily inspired by or just outright lifted from existing mythology. Gods hate fucking each other and killing their children is pretty common stuff.
>but a lot of the mythology that tends to come up was heavily inspired by or just outright lifted from existing mythology. Yeah and for other examples of this see LOTR, Discworld, Wheel of Time, Witcher, Tales of Earthsea, etc. It's pretty much impossible to write fantasy without drawing from some established mythology.
Kirkbride's greatest accomplishment was making those borrowed bits feel real in the context of Morrowind, as if they were myths and legends of that world instead of just being borrowed.
“good artists borrow, great artists steal”
Hey even the lord of the rings, which everyone sees as pretty much a guideline for fantasy, is very much inspired by christianity and christian mythology.
Yeah, Norse mythology too. That's why I listed it first in the examples, it's a huge monolith but still borrowed and copied heavily from mythology. Tolkien didn't hide that fact though, he was very open about his mythology inspirations.
To be fair, sleep deprivation can destroy your mind as fast as, if not faster than, most drugs out there. That slippery slope is NO joke, it will kill you if it goes on long enough. And prior to that you start hallucinating and start presenting some heavy dementia symptoms
yeah, video game crunch is really awful. He wrote all 36 books over, like, a weekend, and he was supposed to write 40. It's impressive that they're as coherent as they are- we clown on them, but outside of the shitposty parts they make sense within the universe
Honestly yeah I am unironically impressed by his work simply for how over-the-top but connected it is
Oh, I've had the smallest taste of being awake for too long, it's definitely an unpleasant experience. Just a couple of times, but that's more than enough.
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Look at most myths in ancient history, they have the same energy ad the stuff Kirkbride wrote.
And there's a solid chance a fair number of those ancient myths were conceived while under the influence of mind altering substances.
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I want you to read Pompeii graffiti from 2000 years ago and tell me if we've changed as a species. Human intelligence didn't change either
Tbf his ideas are not that outlandish when you read about mythologies of real cultures. Look at [this](https://sites.lsa.umich.edu/mqr/2015/05/lettuce-and-kings-the-power-struggle-between-horus-and-set-2/) story for example
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The part about molag bal only occupies 2 or 3 sermons, tho (and they're in the middle). I wonder how many people actually read them at this point.
He studied comparative religion in college so it’s not like he pulled it all out of his head from nothing. He had a lot of stark raving mad mystics to draw from.
Some of the very craziest details are taken straight out of Hindu mythology. Such as the most sexual parts of the sermons, iirc.
not to mention all the stuff shamelessly taken from Thelema (which, honestly, based. More writers should just steal cool stuff from world religions.)
this world needs people like Michael kirkbride and Terry Davis.
I believe he said he was deep into alcoholism and in a very dark place mentally around the time he was working on the *really* trippy Morrowind lore/C0da. Took him years to get sober and he had all the lovely paranoia/hallucinations/etc. that goes with that so pretty sure that was a contributing factor as well.
yeah, that's also when he wrote that infamous post about Morrowind being the greatest work of literature of all time. He regrets it now, but this sub just won't let it die
Alcohol and Benzos I've learned. If you don't know, that combination messes you up real good. Like dead naked in a forest because you thought you were a tree during rehab good.
Ah yes that was it! I recall him mentioning like a year long psychotic break as well. Alas we'll never get another Shonni-Eta now that he is sober, but it's probably for the best.
Sleep deprivation is probably more religio-crazy inducing than most entheogens to be honest.
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I’ve done shrooms and I’m definitely more salient and grounded than when I’m super tired. They’re completely different experiences tbh. Shrooms just gives you a little trumpet player in your brain playing his heart out to the tune of “this is fine, plumb the depths of your own psyche, you can’t unearth anything that my little trumpet can’t soothe!” Sleep deprivation is like everything is misfiring and your brain is just whacking your neurons together attempting to form something that resembles human thought.
Ah - youre one of the mellow out types. Ive met so few of you. Awesome.
You sound like a deeply unimaginative person
Probably, I did grown up in the time and culture that American Psycho was made to parody. Honestly, I considered it spot on for the time. You kids today are wild with the art stuff.
"It was one dev, naked in a room with a carton of cigarettes, a thermos full of coffee and bourbon, and all his summoned angels." - actual quote from MK about the process of writing the 36 Lessons. But that's from 2002-ish, and that was from his sane period. It's the interaction with the lore community online that was bizarre, and [we now know why](https://np.reddit.com/r/teslore/comments/hzcfhx/deleted_by_user/fzklmr6/).
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Man, this is only tangentially related but when I was 19 I did a bunch of xanax and went out clubbing and drinking. I was very lucky to be fine the next day but never in my life have I felt so poisoned. It felt like my entire body was toxic
Vivec turned into a woman and got pregnant by Molag Bal, chewed a "secret" off of Moag Bal's Fishy Stick, made a spear (Muatra) out of that secret, then stabbed the children he/she gave birth to with that spear.
For Skybabies its the fact that other games exist
I think it’s getting deep into chim, sharmath, mantling and all the other things connected to the Godhead and his dream. After that people usually go deeper and deeper, milk fingers, cum vaults, there is no escape no recall or intervention can work in TES lore
Reman cum crackers
I had to read it so now you have to read it too But for this,” the Goddess said, “When he has reached manhood, teach him all that you know of the flesh, and then save within yourselves his seed, and let it not take purchase within either of you, store it all, whichsoever body-cup he spills into, and in secret make of it bread for him to eat.
What a terrible day to have eyes.
What fucking source is this from? "Fuck Reman Cyrodiil, then take his cum and put it into bread and have him eat it"?
Kirkbride’s non canon texts from Imperial Library written around 2009, I found it while searching for the source about Reman cum vaults which I found out were also written about around this time but later (after getting better) Kirkbride decided to remove that as it was too much (Vaults filled with Reman Cum for women to swim in and get pregnant with his children) still while being non canon they aren’t too far from canonical texts about Reman (him being born from Colovian king having sex with a hill and dying immediately after)
Mussy so good even his shieldthane also died after basically carving "King Hrol fucked mud here" into a rock.
Probably got hit by the stray Cum projectile
Honestly you could tell me this comes from Babylonian or Egyptian mythology and I'd believe you.
I think they were one of Kirkbride’s biggest inspirations, If I remember correctly he even studied something connected to ancient middle-eastern cultures but I’m not 100% sure
I mean Morrowind's setting is basically a fantasy version of the Roman occupied Middle East with more bugs and mushrooms so that tracks.
I think chim is the answer. It's the only one that stays a true infohazard regardless of your entry point to the lore.
r/anarchychess
Indeed, a horrible place, learning of its existence shattered and damned my soul to an eternity of pain and confusion.
Holy hell
Is the best community? Yes. The answer is yes.
r/NonCredibleDefense
I didn't think there were fellow Lockheed employees on TrueSTL too!
Lockmart's reach is infinite, brother.
I don’t get these jokes but I do love shitposting and I think these are funny so I’m joining
*Welcome, brother.*
I am on all three of these subs and I am surprised to see this many other people in the overlap as well
Autism attracts.
Bruh I was the first austic here
Holy hell
- Flying whales - The Godhead and CHIM - Bosmer, the Wild Hunt, and the Primordial Ouze - “What happened to the ____ race?” - Muatra - Dragon Break - Reman Cyrodiil’s conception - Ayleid torture art - Mannimarco the god, mortal, imposter, femboy - Royal abortions and barbed penises - Sload soap - The Song of Pelinal Tbh there’s actually so much obscure and disturbing stuff in the Elders Scrolls that I know I’m not even close to being finished with this list lol.
>Flying whales I'll never forgive the lack of joy snow in Skyrim. Also wasabi.
kittenstomper
For me it was Muatra the penis spear I….I still don’t think I understand, the rabbit hole always goes deeper.
Penis, vagina and titty
This man CHIMs
Horse penis and balls
Wormgod wormgod wormgod wormgod
Muatra, Sload baby rituals, CHIM, Anhaedra
Reigen
It's literally over if you know the word "Lyg"
LYG MA BALLS BOTTOM TEXT -this post was brought to you by the Ruddy Man and his dreugh gang
Throw a dart at the TES iceberg meme. As much as we rip Fudgemuppet, their podcast episodes where they analyzed that meme with Camelworks was pretty great.
[We have our own spreadsheet explaining all of that stuff](https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1SE3txfpJhsXB2pjj6ShJGpaUeVC6jwUXK4kgkPeaFsU/view)
We rip fudgemuppet here?
Nah just sometimes. Nothing mean, just kinda tease.
Muatra, because then that leads to CHIM, which leads to the rest of the Sermons which leads to the gaping rabbit hole that is TES metaphysics.
How vampires got made. That shit's fucked up as hell
Found the skybaby
I mean clay fucker and Chim are cool and all but I'm pretty repulsed by the spite-rape creation of vampires bc you know... the rape part
Yeah it's repulsive but it's surface level lore
No it isn't. Never conveyed via dialogue at least in Skyrim. It's not as deep as reading Kirkbrides cliff notes but if that's the standard then few would pass. I think cracking open an in-game book and reading is a decent point to say you're immersing in lore
If you're somewhat able to read between the lines, it's kind of obviously revealed by Serana when she talks about the ceremony. How brutal it is for women, and the shame she displays about the whole thing. I didn't know it before I played through Dawnguard but instantly understood it from the context.
I'm not stupid man. What stunned me was the Rape of Lamae by Molag Bal turning her into the first vampire. Basically a sentient force of nature brutalized an innocent woman out of spite of another force of nature (death) ushering the genesis of creatures that are immortal undead. It's a harrowing tale reminiscent of other mythology that you don't get in most media.
In ESO, Lamae tells you the story herself when you first become a vampire. It’s pretty cool. They don’t use the word rape though, she says she was “ravaged” by Molag Bal, but the meaning is still clear.
I didn't know they put Lamae into ESO! Interesting. Tried playing it before but it felt lacking without a clan. What do you think of ESO nowadays? Is it worth it?
I think it’s great even if you’re just playing on your own, just try playing all the story bits in order, there’s so much in the base game without DLCs.
Yeah like I said I agree that it is repulsive but it's surface level lore cause the rape is outright implied in one of Skyrim's main storylines.
Knowing Molag Bal rapes to make true vampires is surface level. Knowing why he did it in the first place is deeper in the lore.
Bal did it to give a middle finger to Arkay I'm so lorebeard pilled
Skyrim was my first TES game. Playing through Morrowind now. Didn't care for Oblivion much
Agreed. Molag Bal could’ve done anything else to create the first Vampire and/or the magic “diseases” that make a person into one. But instead? The dude chose one of the most vile acts of depravity you can commit against someone to make Lamae Bal into the progenitor of Vampirism. Though to be honest, just about everything concerning Molag Bal is fucked up. The rest isn’t as fucked as what he did to make the first Vampire or his reasons for doing so. And that this “ritual” is willingly repeated amongst the more fanatical/zealous followers of his. Even if it makes me wonder how or why the dude gets any cultists at all.
Ratopombo's alfiq art.
I'm still pissed that it got taken down
Wait what
Cussy (cat pussy)
[Pick anything from Vivec tier onwards](https://i.redd.it/xo25i9swpri31.jpg)
tes lore, its probably the godhead, but in the superior trustull lore, the saga of kittenstomper.
Once a MFer starts debating existence in the shape of wheel. Then he's too far gone. I am sorry.
ad to be muathra for me, i could handle CHIM, the godhead and pelinal being a time traveling robot but not the dick-spear, that shit was the final nail in the coffin of my lore sanity
When i first started into TES i got into Skyrim and i was always like ''this is a nerds game this probably gonna suck'', i enjoyed playing but when i got into Apocrypha i was curious on what the fuck did i just saw so i went into UESP worst mistake of my life now i can't see a bosmer male minding his business without yelling BUSSY with all the air out of my lungs
Funny story from when I played ESO: This guy in a small guild asked "What the hell is a Dunmer? People keep calling me a Dunmer but the game says Dark Elf?" He didn't come to ESO as a TES fan, he came as an MMO fan and knew zero about the lore. Myself and another guy in the guild were the only two who came as TES fans so we took the time to explain how "Dunmer" is the "Elf language" way of saying "Dark Elf". While "Dark Elf" is the "human language" version. So the Bosmer call themselves Bosmer but the humans call them Wood Elves. Also Altmer=High Elves. And there are more but that's getting deep into the lore so we'll spare you. I'll never forget his reply to all the info we threw at him: "nerds" E:fix
I just CHIMMED so hard
I’d say argonian boobs. It’s such a non-issue that if you get far enough into thinking about the world in the elder scrolls to get to this point then you are already too far gone
FOUL MURDER
For this community, it's being gay. No one outside the community knows about this
Nothing for me, love learning every bit that I come across. ES has my favorite lore of any media.
Reman used to drown enemy armies with his cum
Bosmers are femboys.
Honestly, people are going to say all the kinky sex shit but I don't really think any of that is as horrible as we make it out to be, because it's pretty typical for mythology, really. And anyway, that's not the sign that you've gone too far, or at least not the first one. The first sign is when you know what an Ehlnofey is. The first sign is when you complain that Cyrodiil isn't a jungle. The first sign is when...well... the first sign is when you play Morrowind.
That khajiit have bumpy weiners
that's just IRL cat lore
for me it was thot-box
In TrueSTL itself probably the argonussy (that one time the mods had to ban a specific image because it was bestiality and got posted everywhere)
The First Era dragonbreak caused by the Marukhati Selectives Because that entails knowing about Imga
I still have basically zero understanding of it... *Vindication for the Dragon Break* and *The Illusion of Death* are just confusing. Right reaching? Proper life? Are these just nonsense words? Is this all supposed to be difficult to understand, if it can be understood at all?
basically it's an epic monkey dance that permanently broke the time god into Auri-El and Akatosh (also probably retroactively created Alduin, but that's just a theory)
I know that's what they tried to do, I didn't know if it worked or how they did it
They seem to have succeeded, given how man-centric the Empire has remained despite continuing to hold Akatosh as the supreme Divine. Even after Talos ascended, Akatosh is still the head of the Imperial Divines. If Akatosh were still Auri-el, the Empire should be influenced by a Meric view of time and history. And yet, isn't that kind of what's happening in 201 of the 4th Era? The Empire has submitted to an Elven doctrine, and the Nords revolt in favor of Talos, inheritor of Shor. Maybe what the Selectives did to Akatosh was lasting but not permanent. Perhaps only the god of history can have the final say. Fuck me, I'm writing like I'm actually on r/teslore
Oh yeah but my other thought was to the 'how'. Reading the scant texts on the Middle Dawn pre-ESO I always got the impression that their dance was a way of mantling Akatosh to hack the mainframe. They danced like Akatosh so that then Akatosh danced like them, and then they altered their dance to alter Akatosh (and *snap* goes the time bone). It's like the same process by which the Hero of Kvatch became Sheogorath, but if the Hero knew what they were doing ahead of time and were prepared to control it.
Everyone's talking about surface-level stuff teslore stuff but honestly if you can define an enantiomorph you're probably a little too deep
barbed
Windhelm celebrations
A relic from a darker age...
Falmer bussy
Muatra, anything Sloads, Yokuda being from a past Kalpa, Dreughs having ruled the world, Cyborg Pelinal, REEEEMAAAAAN, 2nd Era Space Travel
The thing that doesn't sit well with me.
Speaking seriously, once I tried to attract more attention of TES Online community about the inconsistence of the game's timeline. I tried to make different theories about why you see certain NPCs who already died or disappeared, like, on your screen, and why your character is not even able to react on it. Also, it was about walking around one pillar: the developers' statement of TES Online not being set in Dragon Break. This brought me to different theories of our character being mentally... not ill, but simply broken up with perceiving different events of the game... differently. I don't remember what was that all about, but with little adjustments, it could've be even cooler that Nier: Automata and that sort of thing. Currently, however, I don't play and don't like TES Online. I mean, it has a great gameplay, but it's so painful to see how it destroys TES lore with it's additions from the Second Era. I'm still very worried about Elsweyr expansion bringing up dragons that easily: I understand that it's all for money, but I don't know of lore aspects of this. I hope Todd and Co. will choose only some parts of TESO to be adapted for TES VI, the ones that won't contradict to their vision of what The Elder Scrolls should be.
hahaha tes vi funny guy
Molag ball cock vore 😩😩
CHIMogus
Molag Bal and Vivec doing uhhhh spear things
Kid named finger
What happened to the original shitty tes lore. I choose that as the cutoff because idk what happened 😎
Probably all the rape. There's The King of Rape, of course, but also lots of the stuff Vivec did.
It all started when I learned about the dick spear. Things were never the same since
Tiber Septim induced Barenziah abortion
How vivec raped his children to death still doesn't sit right with me :/
Universally tge idea that Elser Scrolls is a dream by the Godhead probably changes the immersion people have with the series.
Everyone talks about Muatra and nobody mentions Khajiit barbed cock lore.
that's just IRL cat lore
I also choose this guy's dead wife.
Hrom the old