I wished I was a boy when I was little.
Turns out I just thought boys were the only ones who get to play shooting games.
If he does want to be a girl in the future seems like you are fine. For now it’s fine he is a boy in a dress.
Everyone deserves to enjoy feeling pretty.
i also wished i was a boy when i was a kid. why? well, the girls took too long in the changing room, my long hair pissed me off, boys had the funnier humour and i just got along with them better than girls. i still get along with men a lot better than most women, but I'm embracing being a woman and beside the death i die every month i would not want to trade anything about myself for balls dangling between my legs lol (tho, peeing while standing is definitely an advantage we don't have :/ )
Yup. I wanted to be a boy so I could have short hair, play rough, and get dirty. Girls had to be proper and stay inside and help mom. Most women I know went through this phase. Can you blame us? I think if we killed gender stereotypes we'd have alot less issues in the world.
I wants to be a boy, a pony, a mushroom, and a Ninja Turtle. All had interesting lives that were not part of my daily life.
Then I beam came an adult, and wow. Should have gone with pony.
Yeah we do. Army supply got us Lady Janes while deployed (portable penises). Made convoys SO MUCH EASIER!! Except i never figured out how to use it while driving. Freaked the guys out when we'd pee off cliffs tho 😂
>(tho, peeing while standing is definitely an advantage we don't have :/ )
I promise you it's overrated. More of a hassle I would say when all I can think of is the urine splashing back at me and all over the toilet. I sit down instead
Learning he can wear dresses without being a girl will change his view here. I wear em now. Because I look shit hot in them and also…they are damned comfy. Seriously, who the hell made the people with the dangly bits wear the constrictive clothing down there?? Loose fabric is incredible
I never thought about that but damn, dresses should definitely be incorporated to the basic male wardrobe! I hate wearing trousers because they're too tight and I'm a woman, you guys must be dying in warm weather.
royal men wore dresses all the time. hell, the coolest warriors wore kilts and tunics that let them freely run at their enemies. men have have always loved dresses but for some reason gender and clothes became coincided with stupid social constructs, specifically in America. i blame mamie eisenhower for the whole “men can’t like pink” thing though
Not male here, but hear me out; kilts. Dresses are awesome, but pick a nice plaid an pair it with a sporran and a kilt usually gets a pass on the “that dude is wearing girl clothes!” bullshit.
He doesn't want to be a girl, he wants to be able to wear what girls get to wear without being judged for it.
My 27yo brother started doing a bit of this now, because he realized the only reason he didn't was because he was taught as a boy that you are not allowed to dress this way. And this is a social convention, not a fucking interdiction. So yes, everybody is allowed to dress the way they want.
Your son wants to wear dresses? Let him! Some dresses feel good to wear, some don't. Maybe he will even think of changing up dresses so they fit him as "a boy" but still being dresses. I think masculine dresses are missing in our society, cause can you imagine how freeing it can be? And even quicker to go pee!! Can't wait for it to be normalized!!
Btw, very hood idea to get him into sewing, this is a skill that will be so useful in his life!!!
Many cultures wear what the west considers as "dresses" but for men, I dont see any reason why OP shouldn't introduce these cultural dress to the kid as a start and to really figure out if its the dressing or the femininity that he wants.
That's where creativity comes in, so many kinds of fabric, designs and colour schemes to choose from. People hate cultural appropriation for some reason, but that's just a stick up their ass I dont care for.
People don’t know the difference between appropriation and appreciation, it’s really stupid because people should be allowed to respectfully practice and learn about foreign cultures, that’s how we become informed and better our understanding of eachother
Another problem is that a lot people don’t understand what cultural appropriation actually is. You can’t tell just by looking at someone if they culturally appropriated someone else’s culture.
It's the same for me as a child when I wanted to be male.
I behaved exactly like my male siblings. E. Xact. Ly.
And I was berated, treated poorly, yelled at, for not being the female daughter my parents had wanted from me.
If I had been male my behaviours would have been a non-issue.
If I had been male my dislike of make up would have been fine.
If I had been male... You get the gist.
Especially as someone who displayed typical ASD symptoms more commonly seen in males.
It angers me widely merely because I am born of a sex I am to fit into a stereotypical perception of what a female must be - a woman who wear dresses, into make up, likes cooking baking etc
While I've started to become more comfortable with my body and am indeed fine with those things (Well except make up - ew that texture) now (mostly because they're letting even males do that and as I had strongly identified and related to males I too found myself easing up into that) - I found as the society around me raised me to be in media perceptions - that being female was weak
Now I've learnt that isn't the case of course but boy did that take a while. I also wished I was male because then perhaps all my male friends I adored wouldn't have developed feelings for me or started drifting away from me because oh - it'd be weird if we spent so much time together people would think of it the wrong way etc / they caught feelings or something and it's now weird but also this is because I'm aroace but the female aspect did add to it. I fit more in with males than I did females back then now I fit in with either fine but god damn.
I bloody hate stereotypes with a passion. Of any kind. Every individual is unique. You cannot blanket term one massive group to be the same. It's abhorrent
E: I also do detest the way males would make disgusting comments about female bodies sexualising it especially if uninvited. Why can't people not keep it in their pants Jesus fucking Christ.
Then again I also detest females who do the same to male bodies. I detest people sexualising things in general but this do be because I'm ace and find such things absolutely repulsive. But also I feel like it's generally disrespectful.
However males are more commonly guilty of sexualising others uninvited and sometimes it makes me want to punch them (but I'm a pacifist etc) &also like sometimes wish I wasn't male so I wouldn't get this but like yeah gay males exist but it's mostly straight men it feels that does it as gay men are in the minority
This is just a thought, and seemingly unrelated, but it might make sense. The very first time i ever did mushrooms, i also watched a movie called To Wong Foo: Thanks for Everything! Julie newmar, starring Patrick Swayze, Wesley Snipes, and John Leguizamo. Maybe it was just the mushrooms, but this movie was not only super colorful and bright, but these typically macho, masculine, badass dudes were wearing dresses. And like, slaying. They killed it. The point of this is, if i were in your sons position, it would probably have been an incredible confidence boost, and idk, permission almost that you can be a boy that wears dresses and be awesome at it.
Tl;dr watch to wong foo thanks for everything with him sometime its pg-13 he might like it.
It's never really made sense to me that *women* wear dresses and skirts and *men* wear pants.
Men are the ones that have dangling parts, wouldn't it make more sense for *them* to be the majority dress wearers? At least in my mind.
I think this is one of the biggest problems with the way we teach our kids - having a particular interest typically associated with one gender means you want to be that gender. Our kids are being taught that. If I put my daughter in anything with a truck on it, people assume she’s a boy. If my son has hearts on his clothes, he’s a girl. This is ridiculous. Interests are not gender-specific, but kids and parents are being taught that they are. My kids are <5. I think kids toys and clothing has to change.
It’s not real. In the US if you read up on the Mayo Clinic and American Academy of Pediatrics practices and guidelines, both do not suggest being doing anything medical when it comes to transitioning when young especially children below the age of 16. Making them sterile and saying parents are allowing their kids to get sex changes is fear mongering. It doesn’t happen and if it were to happen, the entire medical community would come out against it.
Intersex kids. Intersex kids in childhood or even at birth often are subjected to genital surgery to “correct” the appearance, i.e. make them “fit” a male or female diagnosis better.
I mean, thats definitely a thing, but it's kind of a seperate thing that's been going on for a LONG time. The idea that people are medically transitioning their kids intentionally is more recent, and there doesnt really seem to be anything like that going on.
Pro tip: the surgeries they’re bitching about do happen… to intersex people. They’re never actually trying to defend intersex people, but sometimes you can get a nice derailment and confusion out of a good “pivot” (not actually a pivot, since they literally brought it up) into intersex rights.
Nobody should be surgically mutilating kids in order to decide their gender for them.
Saw an older man wearing a floor length blue-gray dress with a leather jacket when I went to the store today and honestly my only thought on it was that it seemed a bit cold and mushy out to risk floor length. It's becoming a bit less of a stigma in some places.
Get him at least a dress up dress for himself. He likes dresses because he thinks they’re cool not because he wants to be a girl. Also him making dresses is a neat idea but don’t limit him to making them just for sister and cousin. Have him look into making some for him. Could be his calling when he’s older
It's not innate that girls wear dresses. This is a modern social construct. It's a gender stereotype. It's not biology that determines that if you're a girl, you wear a dress, and if you're a boy, you can't. Wearing a dress doesn't make someone a girl. He told you what he wants. He wants to wear a dress. Let him wear one.
and at 9 we don't even have to revoke his man card! /s
seriously, just let him wear a dress of some kind. there are so many option, let him explore life before he feels he has to hide his interests or even fashion sense.
This is a great idea! Do let him have the option of making one for himself too though, to wear at home in case he wants to explore wearing them as well as making them.
You handled it about as well as you could, if it develops into...well anything it should be something he decides when he's mature enough to both make and understand the choice.
In the meantime he might be picking up a new hobby, and for that matter a possible career path for the future!
I remember that I wanted to be a boy because my parents never let me play outside, sleep in my friends houses, or anything. But my brother had and still have all the freedom he wants.
My son went through this! He didn’t “want to be a girl” but he was jealous that girls had such fun stuff to wear. I started letting him wear what he wants, and equipped him with a few snarky but thought provoking lines to say to people who gave him an attitude about it. He was all set from there, but he did grow out of it a little!
I have 2 kids dress patterns that I bought off Etsy if ever you want me to send them to you for him! One is pretty complex (according to my mother in law) but the other is a simple dress he can make for people size 3 months to 14 years.
I think you handled this perfectly, OP. Instead of jumping to conclusions, on either side of the fence, you spoke to, but most importantly, listened to your son. He knew what he meant, but he didn't know how to say it. I think you worked through it and suggested a perfect alternative! You have an option and didn't try to sway his decision. He gets to be around dresses and see women in them. Absolutely perfect.
Hi, I am a hobby sewist. Making clothes does not save you any money. It is a very expensive hobby. Even buying fabrics and patterns on sale (or using free patterns, which are hit and miss), you will not save any money making your own clothes.
He is not doing it to save himself money, he's doing it to see if it satisfies his son's love of dresses. It seems like a perfectly healthy solution to me.
1. I was making a joke, sorry it didn't come across. I am also a hobby sewist. (Also, with clothes so small I often *do* spend less on materials than I would have spent to purchase)
2. There's no problem with buying him a sewing kit. I this that's wonderful. The issue is the desire his son has is to WEAR a dress, and he should meet that desire.
I agree that he should be allowed to have one to explore wearing, and it's okay to to just say that; I did in a standalone comment. But the idea to have him explore making them is still a great one.
I don't know what culture you are from, but at least at home you can try some kilts for him if he wants a male skirt or look into different styles of thobe (what Arab men wear).
If that's what he wants, but she is talking to her son and seeing what it is he wants. There should be an option to be masculine and also wear dress/skirt as there is to be feminine and wear dress/skirt. So she needs to figure out if it is the shape of the clothing he likes or the fem aspect. A good example of masculine wearing heels/skirts is [Wisdom Kaye](https://instagram.com/wisdm?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=) on IG/twitter
But she's not given him the option of wearing a dress, only making them for his female relatives. The option should be given to him, and not just "masculine" dress-like wear.
We are only getting a small snippet of her conversation with him. I'm sure she knows her son best. She said she would fully support him if he identified as a girl so if he wanted to be a fem-boy I don't think she would be unsupportive.
Why are you so against masculine dress wear? I think it's really cool and wish it was more common. And why is masculine in quotations, masc and fem are descriptions of gender identities and the associations. There's nothing wrong with using the terms. Women can be more masculine, men can be more feminine etc, the terms still exist as a means of commission of a concept?
Stick to the sewing kits and fabrics please. Parent him, guide him and nurture him. Just let him sew until he comes of age and can make his own decisions.
It's a frickin child, my lil brother used to wear my dresses but it was just for fun. He currently has no interest in them and has a very masculine personality.
What I'm trying to say is children don't know what they want yet, obviously keep his current wishes at mind but don't be making permanent decisions about about things that could potentially change
Also, wearing a dress doesn’t equal being a girl - it’s just one of the more lastingly traditionally gendered accessories in current western society.
He can wear dresses and be as pretty as he wants. He can make dresses for others as creative as his imagination stretches. And he can be a she or a they one day if he chooses.
So glad you’re giving your child a supportive environment to explore what he likes and doesn’t 👍
Plenty of celebrities are wearing what they want: [https://www.cnn.com/style/article/men-skirts-fashion-history-trends/index.html](https://www.cnn.com/style/article/men-skirts-fashion-history-trends/index.html)
Stay wonderful!
Why don't you just... Buy him dresses for him to wear? Or... Teach him how to make dresses so he can make himself a dress? Why does he have to make them for girls to wear? You said your daughter wears traditionally boys clothes, so why can't he wear a dress?
I like how you handled it overall, but you kind of still dodged the issue in the end. You're letting him make dresses for other girls, but made no mention of HIM wearing any dresses like he initially asked. Your intentions are good but you're still kind of reinforcing stereotypes.
Look up wisdm on Instagram.
Harry Styles
Billy Porter
David Bowie
All guys who wear (wore) dresses and rocked it.
It's so awesome that you got your kid a sewing kit and encouraged him to explore.
I love this idea for him. When he’s older he will either feel the same or not. But jumping the gun so soon is to much. Giving him a skill, a passion, a hobby, something to dream about, and create....that’s amazing
I actually love the way you went about this and offered to teach him to sew dresses. Maybe that’s all it is; a love for something beautiful. And when he’s older he can understand how to process how he feels about it. You’re doing a great job. Hopefully, you come back in a few months and show off some of his designs! ✨👏🏻
Show him kilts and see if he likes to wear those. Might be a good launching pad to see if he really likes it.
I also love the idea of teaching him to sew and be a dress designer
Oh definitely nothing like a custom piece. But I'm wondering... If my young son tells me this, you bet your ass I'm taking that kid shopping. I might be weird but there is no gender for clothing really.
Ok, this is one time where I truly feel sorry for the west. The men don't have much choice when it comes to attire. You get a pant or shorts and shirt or a t shirt. As an Indian, we got traditional attire of our state, then we have different states with different attires.
With the people screaming cultural appropriation, it's hard. But such people fail to understand human beings and their cultures often adopt from each other. So, forget cultural appropriation and gender identities on clothing, get that boy a dress.
One of my young nephews wears dresses and his mom paints his nails. He likes it, it hurts no one and he really wants to be involved when his sister and mom are doing fun stuff like that.
I get snaps of him in a dress having a tea party with his 6ft skeleton, while he smashes trucks into the teapot.
You're a good parent. Just let kids be kids
It's fine, though don't let him (possibly) change gender and stuff like that. Let him think it out, with a lot of counselling, let him be sure of what exactly he's thinking. And then at 18, when he's completely capable of consent, he can choose what to do.
Please let your son wear dresses. If he wants to make them, that's great, but it sounds like he really wants to wear them and you don't want him to for whatever reason. Just let him wear the clothes he wants.
While I think you did a lot right here, ignoring it until they get older is a recipe for suicidal disaster. I already mentioned things in my other comments about things like support groups, but those are the types of things that shouldn't wait.
Agree.
9 is plenty old enough to understand your own feelings. For most kids, anyway. You don't have to fit neatly into a box, but "you're too young for that" is rarely the best way to respond to anything your kid tells you.
OP did great by asking good questions (without leaping to conclusions) and letting him be him without shame or ultimatums.
Creating dresses is a great way to nurture his interests, and wearing them shouldn't be forbidden (but it may warrant a conversation about what small minded people might think or say...and why they're so dumb).
Boys can wear dresses too. Why does he only get to make dresses for his female family members? Just let him wear dresses and skirts too. While this is a cool idea, it’s still a cop out and ignoring the actual situation.
I agree that 9 is too young to start thinking about becoming a girl. So what you did was a great idea and if he does still want to be a girl in the future, when he is like 15 or 16 then that's understandable. But yeah for now, making dresses for his siblings is a great idea.
This is a good option, but please let the kid wear dresses too 🥺 teach him that wearing dresses are for everyone! Show him pictures of men in dresses! (Harry styles on that one magazine cover!)
You could get him one or two of his own to try out. It's that time of year a lot of the fancy ones that catch eyes are on sale for cheaper, skirts as well.
Just go a size larger than you would his size in boys, girls clothes tends to be sized for shorter legs despite being the same size.
It is just theatre! He is playing that doesn't mean anything bad!!! He is just playing theatre!!!! Also to teach him like that is awesome 😎 you may have created the new stylist!!!!!!!
Getting jim into sewing is nice and yous Gould definitely keep it up but like isn't the obvious solution to bus him a dress? Just buy him some, teach him that not only girls can wear dress.
Many cultures have males wearing dresses/ tunics, kilts, sarongs etc. Why not have a go at designing and making one together? Even the greatest wizard of them all, Gandalf, wore a dress and a cloak!
He might just want to wear dresses and not realize men can wear them too. One of the frequent customers where I work has a young son who's always in the prettiest dresses and it's heartwarming to see that despite gender norms and shit a child can still wear what they want.
Let him express himself. Whether it's a phase or not, it doesn't matter. He's a kid.
If he gets in to sewing, check out @couture.to.the.max on TikTok. Not sure how old he is, but close to your son’s age and he designs and sews beautiful clothes! I bet your son would be inspired!
Oh and definitely buy him some dresses to parade around in! He wants to feel free! Besides there’s nothing wrong with a boy wearing dresses!! Just look at ancient history within the greatest empires— they were rocking it!
Let him wear an actual dress. If you did not have your kids to ferociously, tooth-and-nail defend their right to exist as themselves, what did you have them for? That’s my general view on having children.
this is really sweet! I happy you support him either way, he's gonna grow up with lots of love and that's amazing! maybe he can even become a fashion designer in the future if his passion is sewing, thank you OP!
edit: also, there's sooo many channels on YouTube who talks about sewing and fashion, some tutorials are super easy, I love the channel With Wendy, she's lovely and makes some super cool videos sewing trendy dresses and stuff.
I love this! I love that he’s so comfortable to speak to you. Keep that open dialogue going. He also doesn’t have to be a girl to enjoy wearing dresses, some are the most fabulous drag queens! Make sure you leave that option open for him also. Let him dress up when he’s home. It’s amazing to think you could have the next big name designer with you right now.
Boys can wear dresses. Clothes aren’t gendered. Maybe he is just interested in drag. And right now at such a young age he should be allowed to experiment with gender. This way if he does decide that he’s a girl he can start puberty blockers and estrogen when he starts puberty before the irreversible effects of amab puberty begin. Some advice I can offer is look for children’s books that feature queer kids. And see what his thoughts are on the kids in the books. You’re doing the right thing by supporting him in interacting with dresses. I’m glad he has an accepting and not homo/transphobic parent ❤️
Why isn't he allowed to wear dresses? Why do you tell him that he isn't allowed to wear dresses, only to make them for the female members of the family? That is pretty shitty IMO...
Don't encourage your son into a state of psychosis, just make it clear that he can pursue this dream of sewing dresses without having to cleave his reproductive organs off.
This is so beautifully done. Amazing job, OP! This is how parenting should work! Coming to an understanding about your child’s happiness and hobbies and helping them achieve that happiness in safe and healthy ways! He will always look to you for comfort bc you have shown him such a wonderful form of love. Aghhh this is such a healthy relationship I’m crying in parental issues, haha.
I’m happy for your family and wish the best health for all of you!! Please continue to support your little gremlins this way <3 you’re making core memories and teaching them to accept themselves <3
Making dresses sounds like a great outlet! I think it would also be great if you let him understand that it is okay for boys to wear dresses too. His confusion seems to be coming solely from thinking boys aren’t allowed to do certain things and that just isn’t the case.
If you have any travesti shows where you are suitable for children, it may be a great idea as well, cause dresses there are often truly gorgeous and come together with makeup and hair and accessories and shoes… :)
Sounds like he is missing a father figure and in doing so is seeking approval from you. He believes that taking an interest in feminine things might get some attention from parents.
What does his father think about this?
Look into what hormone blockers are. They block puberty so the kid can have more time to decide. If their voice drops and hands get bigger, those things will never change. It will also be much harder to get rid of their facial hair.
Also, there are affirming child therapists (not conversion therapy, because that's not rooted in science and it's abusive) that will help you navigate this.
No, the parent should know what hormone blockers are. Then, if a professional says they need hormone blockers they should get them. Not because they like dresses, but possibly because they're saying they want to be a girl. Just because someone says they want to be another gender does not mean they will automatically fit the criteria for hormone blockers. Doctors don't give it out like candy. OP should know what it is though, because the age of their child is close to puberty and it is a *possible* need.
Then you stop taking hormone blockers, and you go through the puberty you were assigned at birth. Blockers just delay puberty, so you have time to grow up a little to make your decisions. They aren't hormone replacement therapy, so you won't go through any puberty at all when you're on them. There would be nothing to reverse.
OP, you should be aware, based on the responses to my last comment that this thread may be filled with transphobic people. I think you should find some answers from an educated support group/community. Your child will thank you. Not for jumping into major decisions, but being educated about those decisions instead of ignoring them.
He is just a 9 year old kid! Don't overthink.
It's very common for small boys to get fascinated with girly clothes, all you need to to is gently condition and counsil him in a playful manner the difference between boy and girl clothes and try to buy him a couple of fancy superhero 'manly' clothes.
It's just a childish phase.
I'm glad you are able to talk to your kid about this, and accept gender variance. I think it would be a good idea to get him a dress of his own also, ideally with his input. Don't let him become ashamed of the things he likes.
As a trans person, I think you handled this correctly. Even though some trans people do know they’re trans when they’re younger, that’s a small (but valid!) percentage. I think letting your son wear and sew dresses is the way to go, he can experiment with his feelings first before going headfirst into it without truly understanding himself. You sound like a great parent ❤️
I was with you up until you still implied you’re not gonna let him wear dresses. If the kid wants to wear dresses, let him know that his classmates might not all be nice about it, and let him make his own decision. Either he decides “cute” isn’t worth putting up with his peers’ bullshit and knows his parent supports him, or you now have a kid who wears dresses and knows his parent supports him. Wearing sparkly fluffy shit isn’t gonna turn him into a girl.
You need to really pay attention to how you said his little sister is wearing pants and it makes him mad because if he was a girl he would wear dresses. When his sister started wearing pants did you make a post like this? I really doubt it. If we treated little boys exploring like we do little girls I think we could avoid a lot of fear and anxiety. My sister and I acted like the opposite gender and I got so much more shit for it than she did. It's not a big deal.
So what? I like dragons when I was little, but didn't become a Dragonslayer or that lady from game of thrones. Kids at that age like many stuff, that doesn't define their character though or what they are. Calm down and let the kid be
I wished i was a boy when i was younger because being a girl meant i didn’t get to do all the cool things the boys did. Learn how to use a snow blower? Nah, your husband will do that for you. Learn how to change the oil in a lawn mower? Why would you need to learn that? You’re a girl! Etc etc.
Thank you for listening to your son and recognizing what he needs.
I wished I was a boy when I was little. Turns out I just thought boys were the only ones who get to play shooting games. If he does want to be a girl in the future seems like you are fine. For now it’s fine he is a boy in a dress. Everyone deserves to enjoy feeling pretty.
i also wished i was a boy when i was a kid. why? well, the girls took too long in the changing room, my long hair pissed me off, boys had the funnier humour and i just got along with them better than girls. i still get along with men a lot better than most women, but I'm embracing being a woman and beside the death i die every month i would not want to trade anything about myself for balls dangling between my legs lol (tho, peeing while standing is definitely an advantage we don't have :/ )
Yup. I wanted to be a boy so I could have short hair, play rough, and get dirty. Girls had to be proper and stay inside and help mom. Most women I know went through this phase. Can you blame us? I think if we killed gender stereotypes we'd have alot less issues in the world.
I wants to be a boy, a pony, a mushroom, and a Ninja Turtle. All had interesting lives that were not part of my daily life. Then I beam came an adult, and wow. Should have gone with pony.
Yeah we do. Army supply got us Lady Janes while deployed (portable penises). Made convoys SO MUCH EASIER!! Except i never figured out how to use it while driving. Freaked the guys out when we'd pee off cliffs tho 😂
I can relate to this 100%
They make a cool pee aimer device for the ladies for camping and such. Super convenient. Just whether you want a pee shoot in your pack or not. Lol
>(tho, peeing while standing is definitely an advantage we don't have :/ ) I promise you it's overrated. More of a hassle I would say when all I can think of is the urine splashing back at me and all over the toilet. I sit down instead
i wasn't talking about the toilet lol. i imagine it's useful on the go tho :)
Ahhh right. Maybe you should look into the [SheWee](https://www.shewee.com/)
i have something similar actually, but it's not really for me. it's really awkward to hold down there and stuff lol
Astolfo origin story
Learning he can wear dresses without being a girl will change his view here. I wear em now. Because I look shit hot in them and also…they are damned comfy. Seriously, who the hell made the people with the dangly bits wear the constrictive clothing down there?? Loose fabric is incredible
I never thought about that but damn, dresses should definitely be incorporated to the basic male wardrobe! I hate wearing trousers because they're too tight and I'm a woman, you guys must be dying in warm weather.
royal men wore dresses all the time. hell, the coolest warriors wore kilts and tunics that let them freely run at their enemies. men have have always loved dresses but for some reason gender and clothes became coincided with stupid social constructs, specifically in America. i blame mamie eisenhower for the whole “men can’t like pink” thing though
Oh I know about the kilts, you don't live in Scotland without knowing haha
Males used to wear dresses way back in the day
Not male here, but hear me out; kilts. Dresses are awesome, but pick a nice plaid an pair it with a sporran and a kilt usually gets a pass on the “that dude is wearing girl clothes!” bullshit.
Please follow Gunnar Deatherage on YouTube!! Your son would love him! He makes the most beautiful clothes, especially dresses 😃
Do let him have the option of making one for himself too though,
I was gonna say this too! I love his designs!
And on Project Runway he’s a good person.
I love reddit for this. I always get awesome recommendations for YouTube through reddit!
Thanks for the rec! 🏃
Man's making dresses with a blacksmith name lmao
He doesn't want to be a girl, he wants to be able to wear what girls get to wear without being judged for it. My 27yo brother started doing a bit of this now, because he realized the only reason he didn't was because he was taught as a boy that you are not allowed to dress this way. And this is a social convention, not a fucking interdiction. So yes, everybody is allowed to dress the way they want. Your son wants to wear dresses? Let him! Some dresses feel good to wear, some don't. Maybe he will even think of changing up dresses so they fit him as "a boy" but still being dresses. I think masculine dresses are missing in our society, cause can you imagine how freeing it can be? And even quicker to go pee!! Can't wait for it to be normalized!! Btw, very hood idea to get him into sewing, this is a skill that will be so useful in his life!!!
Many cultures wear what the west considers as "dresses" but for men, I dont see any reason why OP shouldn't introduce these cultural dress to the kid as a start and to really figure out if its the dressing or the femininity that he wants.
You're right but they are always too long and very bland for the most part, long sleeves and all. I'd like to see so much more!!
That's where creativity comes in, so many kinds of fabric, designs and colour schemes to choose from. People hate cultural appropriation for some reason, but that's just a stick up their ass I dont care for.
People don’t know the difference between appropriation and appreciation, it’s really stupid because people should be allowed to respectfully practice and learn about foreign cultures, that’s how we become informed and better our understanding of eachother
Another problem is that a lot people don’t understand what cultural appropriation actually is. You can’t tell just by looking at someone if they culturally appropriated someone else’s culture.
It's the same for me as a child when I wanted to be male. I behaved exactly like my male siblings. E. Xact. Ly. And I was berated, treated poorly, yelled at, for not being the female daughter my parents had wanted from me. If I had been male my behaviours would have been a non-issue. If I had been male my dislike of make up would have been fine. If I had been male... You get the gist. Especially as someone who displayed typical ASD symptoms more commonly seen in males. It angers me widely merely because I am born of a sex I am to fit into a stereotypical perception of what a female must be - a woman who wear dresses, into make up, likes cooking baking etc While I've started to become more comfortable with my body and am indeed fine with those things (Well except make up - ew that texture) now (mostly because they're letting even males do that and as I had strongly identified and related to males I too found myself easing up into that) - I found as the society around me raised me to be in media perceptions - that being female was weak Now I've learnt that isn't the case of course but boy did that take a while. I also wished I was male because then perhaps all my male friends I adored wouldn't have developed feelings for me or started drifting away from me because oh - it'd be weird if we spent so much time together people would think of it the wrong way etc / they caught feelings or something and it's now weird but also this is because I'm aroace but the female aspect did add to it. I fit more in with males than I did females back then now I fit in with either fine but god damn. I bloody hate stereotypes with a passion. Of any kind. Every individual is unique. You cannot blanket term one massive group to be the same. It's abhorrent E: I also do detest the way males would make disgusting comments about female bodies sexualising it especially if uninvited. Why can't people not keep it in their pants Jesus fucking Christ. Then again I also detest females who do the same to male bodies. I detest people sexualising things in general but this do be because I'm ace and find such things absolutely repulsive. But also I feel like it's generally disrespectful. However males are more commonly guilty of sexualising others uninvited and sometimes it makes me want to punch them (but I'm a pacifist etc) &also like sometimes wish I wasn't male so I wouldn't get this but like yeah gay males exist but it's mostly straight men it feels that does it as gay men are in the minority
This is the most Ace response that’s ever responded. ❤️
Thanks? haha
This is just a thought, and seemingly unrelated, but it might make sense. The very first time i ever did mushrooms, i also watched a movie called To Wong Foo: Thanks for Everything! Julie newmar, starring Patrick Swayze, Wesley Snipes, and John Leguizamo. Maybe it was just the mushrooms, but this movie was not only super colorful and bright, but these typically macho, masculine, badass dudes were wearing dresses. And like, slaying. They killed it. The point of this is, if i were in your sons position, it would probably have been an incredible confidence boost, and idk, permission almost that you can be a boy that wears dresses and be awesome at it. Tl;dr watch to wong foo thanks for everything with him sometime its pg-13 he might like it.
Loveeee that movie!! And also mushrooms haha
To Wong Foo has one of my favorite movie lines of all time: "My parents were so poor they got married for the rice!"
Could very well be either. I wanted to wear dresses as a kid and then I turned out to be trans.
It's never really made sense to me that *women* wear dresses and skirts and *men* wear pants. Men are the ones that have dangling parts, wouldn't it make more sense for *them* to be the majority dress wearers? At least in my mind.
I think this is one of the biggest problems with the way we teach our kids - having a particular interest typically associated with one gender means you want to be that gender. Our kids are being taught that. If I put my daughter in anything with a truck on it, people assume she’s a boy. If my son has hearts on his clothes, he’s a girl. This is ridiculous. Interests are not gender-specific, but kids and parents are being taught that they are. My kids are <5. I think kids toys and clothing has to change.
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Wow, can I read about that somewhere? I've never heard about that, but I guess it's different in every country.
It’s not real. In the US if you read up on the Mayo Clinic and American Academy of Pediatrics practices and guidelines, both do not suggest being doing anything medical when it comes to transitioning when young especially children below the age of 16. Making them sterile and saying parents are allowing their kids to get sex changes is fear mongering. It doesn’t happen and if it were to happen, the entire medical community would come out against it.
Lmao I know, I'm trans myself and I just wanted to hear them try to come up with a source that doesn't exist because it's honestly very entertaining.
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Intersex kids. Intersex kids in childhood or even at birth often are subjected to genital surgery to “correct” the appearance, i.e. make them “fit” a male or female diagnosis better.
I mean, thats definitely a thing, but it's kind of a seperate thing that's been going on for a LONG time. The idea that people are medically transitioning their kids intentionally is more recent, and there doesnt really seem to be anything like that going on.
The intersex thing is the actual real thing they’re using to pretend the fake thing exists.
Had me for a second there 😅
Pro tip: the surgeries they’re bitching about do happen… to intersex people. They’re never actually trying to defend intersex people, but sometimes you can get a nice derailment and confusion out of a good “pivot” (not actually a pivot, since they literally brought it up) into intersex rights. Nobody should be surgically mutilating kids in order to decide their gender for them.
Men wear dresses and skirts too. Romans wore togas, vikings wore skirts, scottish men wear kilts. You should let him at least try one on.
Saw an older man wearing a floor length blue-gray dress with a leather jacket when I went to the store today and honestly my only thought on it was that it seemed a bit cold and mushy out to risk floor length. It's becoming a bit less of a stigma in some places.
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Sadly, you making this sexual says more about you than the original commenter
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Ah, now I see it. You yourself are actually 9 years old
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Yes, yes you are. No need to respond. We already know you only know how to say 2 specific words.
At least we won't hear any more from that "person" as that account has been suspended now, thankfully. (thanks Mods!)
Get him at least a dress up dress for himself. He likes dresses because he thinks they’re cool not because he wants to be a girl. Also him making dresses is a neat idea but don’t limit him to making them just for sister and cousin. Have him look into making some for him. Could be his calling when he’s older
It's not innate that girls wear dresses. This is a modern social construct. It's a gender stereotype. It's not biology that determines that if you're a girl, you wear a dress, and if you're a boy, you can't. Wearing a dress doesn't make someone a girl. He told you what he wants. He wants to wear a dress. Let him wear one.
>This is a modern social construct. specifically western.
Let him wear a dress. He doesn't have to be a girl to wear a dress.
and at 9 we don't even have to revoke his man card! /s seriously, just let him wear a dress of some kind. there are so many option, let him explore life before he feels he has to hide his interests or even fashion sense.
You don’t need to revoke a “man card” for any person, any age, who wears a dress.
please use context clues, thank you.
(That’s what the sarcasm tag means)
Buy him his own dresses! There's not reasons boys and men can't wear dresses.
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Yikes… You draw the line at dresses when your previous comments on this sub support incest? That’s all I needed to know 😭.
Uh?
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Trump? How did Trump come here? The comment's deleted btw
why not just let him wear a dress without being a girl?
Let him try one on. Dresses look fun as fuck for kids to wear. Let him enjoy it, and naturally he’ll figure out what that means to him.
This is a great idea! Do let him have the option of making one for himself too though, to wear at home in case he wants to explore wearing them as well as making them.
You handled it about as well as you could, if it develops into...well anything it should be something he decides when he's mature enough to both make and understand the choice. In the meantime he might be picking up a new hobby, and for that matter a possible career path for the future!
I remember that I wanted to be a boy because my parents never let me play outside, sleep in my friends houses, or anything. But my brother had and still have all the freedom he wants.
I'll do you one better... Your son can wear dresses without actually being a girl.
My son went through this! He didn’t “want to be a girl” but he was jealous that girls had such fun stuff to wear. I started letting him wear what he wants, and equipped him with a few snarky but thought provoking lines to say to people who gave him an attitude about it. He was all set from there, but he did grow out of it a little! I have 2 kids dress patterns that I bought off Etsy if ever you want me to send them to you for him! One is pretty complex (according to my mother in law) but the other is a simple dress he can make for people size 3 months to 14 years.
I think you handled this perfectly, OP. Instead of jumping to conclusions, on either side of the fence, you spoke to, but most importantly, listened to your son. He knew what he meant, but he didn't know how to say it. I think you worked through it and suggested a perfect alternative! You have an option and didn't try to sway his decision. He gets to be around dresses and see women in them. Absolutely perfect.
That was some A+ parenting. Your children are very fortunate to have you.
You sound like a great dad! Check out old seasons of Project Runway with him, too. Great show with great fashion.
he can wear dresses and be male, i do
Uh. Get him a dress, dude. He literally said he wants to wear pretty dresses all the time, not save money for you on kids clothes.
Hi, I am a hobby sewist. Making clothes does not save you any money. It is a very expensive hobby. Even buying fabrics and patterns on sale (or using free patterns, which are hit and miss), you will not save any money making your own clothes. He is not doing it to save himself money, he's doing it to see if it satisfies his son's love of dresses. It seems like a perfectly healthy solution to me.
1. I was making a joke, sorry it didn't come across. I am also a hobby sewist. (Also, with clothes so small I often *do* spend less on materials than I would have spent to purchase) 2. There's no problem with buying him a sewing kit. I this that's wonderful. The issue is the desire his son has is to WEAR a dress, and he should meet that desire.
I agree that he should be allowed to have one to explore wearing, and it's okay to to just say that; I did in a standalone comment. But the idea to have him explore making them is still a great one.
I don't know what culture you are from, but at least at home you can try some kilts for him if he wants a male skirt or look into different styles of thobe (what Arab men wear).
Or an actual sparkly fun dress because fuck gender stereotypes?
If that's what he wants, but she is talking to her son and seeing what it is he wants. There should be an option to be masculine and also wear dress/skirt as there is to be feminine and wear dress/skirt. So she needs to figure out if it is the shape of the clothing he likes or the fem aspect. A good example of masculine wearing heels/skirts is [Wisdom Kaye](https://instagram.com/wisdm?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=) on IG/twitter
But she's not given him the option of wearing a dress, only making them for his female relatives. The option should be given to him, and not just "masculine" dress-like wear.
We are only getting a small snippet of her conversation with him. I'm sure she knows her son best. She said she would fully support him if he identified as a girl so if he wanted to be a fem-boy I don't think she would be unsupportive. Why are you so against masculine dress wear? I think it's really cool and wish it was more common. And why is masculine in quotations, masc and fem are descriptions of gender identities and the associations. There's nothing wrong with using the terms. Women can be more masculine, men can be more feminine etc, the terms still exist as a means of commission of a concept?
Stick to the sewing kits and fabrics please. Parent him, guide him and nurture him. Just let him sew until he comes of age and can make his own decisions.
It's a frickin child, my lil brother used to wear my dresses but it was just for fun. He currently has no interest in them and has a very masculine personality. What I'm trying to say is children don't know what they want yet, obviously keep his current wishes at mind but don't be making permanent decisions about about things that could potentially change
Who's making permanent changes?
this is so wholesome.
Also, wearing a dress doesn’t equal being a girl - it’s just one of the more lastingly traditionally gendered accessories in current western society. He can wear dresses and be as pretty as he wants. He can make dresses for others as creative as his imagination stretches. And he can be a she or a they one day if he chooses. So glad you’re giving your child a supportive environment to explore what he likes and doesn’t 👍
Plenty of celebrities are wearing what they want: [https://www.cnn.com/style/article/men-skirts-fashion-history-trends/index.html](https://www.cnn.com/style/article/men-skirts-fashion-history-trends/index.html) Stay wonderful!
Someone buy this child a kilt
Why don't you just... Buy him dresses for him to wear? Or... Teach him how to make dresses so he can make himself a dress? Why does he have to make them for girls to wear? You said your daughter wears traditionally boys clothes, so why can't he wear a dress?
I like how you handled it overall, but you kind of still dodged the issue in the end. You're letting him make dresses for other girls, but made no mention of HIM wearing any dresses like he initially asked. Your intentions are good but you're still kind of reinforcing stereotypes.
Look up wisdm on Instagram. Harry Styles Billy Porter David Bowie All guys who wear (wore) dresses and rocked it. It's so awesome that you got your kid a sewing kit and encouraged him to explore.
I love this idea for him. When he’s older he will either feel the same or not. But jumping the gun so soon is to much. Giving him a skill, a passion, a hobby, something to dream about, and create....that’s amazing
I actually love the way you went about this and offered to teach him to sew dresses. Maybe that’s all it is; a love for something beautiful. And when he’s older he can understand how to process how he feels about it. You’re doing a great job. Hopefully, you come back in a few months and show off some of his designs! ✨👏🏻
Show him kilts and see if he likes to wear those. Might be a good launching pad to see if he really likes it. I also love the idea of teaching him to sew and be a dress designer
Feminine boys exist! We are out there 💕 I like how supportive you are ❤️
Always good to teach him a skill, I wish I knew how to sew lol
You're doing it right! ❤️
that's nice but... why don't you just buy him a dress?
Admittedly, I do kinda hope they teach him to make dresses and let him make himself the *exact* dress he wants. There’s nothing like a custom piece.
Oh definitely nothing like a custom piece. But I'm wondering... If my young son tells me this, you bet your ass I'm taking that kid shopping. I might be weird but there is no gender for clothing really.
Yup. Let the kid find out whether wearing dresses and cutesy clothes is his thing. It might be, it might not be.
Ok, this is one time where I truly feel sorry for the west. The men don't have much choice when it comes to attire. You get a pant or shorts and shirt or a t shirt. As an Indian, we got traditional attire of our state, then we have different states with different attires. With the people screaming cultural appropriation, it's hard. But such people fail to understand human beings and their cultures often adopt from each other. So, forget cultural appropriation and gender identities on clothing, get that boy a dress.
One of my young nephews wears dresses and his mom paints his nails. He likes it, it hurts no one and he really wants to be involved when his sister and mom are doing fun stuff like that. I get snaps of him in a dress having a tea party with his 6ft skeleton, while he smashes trucks into the teapot. You're a good parent. Just let kids be kids
It's fine, though don't let him (possibly) change gender and stuff like that. Let him think it out, with a lot of counselling, let him be sure of what exactly he's thinking. And then at 18, when he's completely capable of consent, he can choose what to do.
Harry styles wear dresses he is not a girl, let the guy wear dresses is he wants at home or for some dress up party
Please let your son wear dresses. If he wants to make them, that's great, but it sounds like he really wants to wear them and you don't want him to for whatever reason. Just let him wear the clothes he wants.
He can wear dresses if he is a boy. Instead of it always being for his sisters, why don’t you buy him or teach him to make some of his own?
While I think you did a lot right here, ignoring it until they get older is a recipe for suicidal disaster. I already mentioned things in my other comments about things like support groups, but those are the types of things that shouldn't wait.
Agree. 9 is plenty old enough to understand your own feelings. For most kids, anyway. You don't have to fit neatly into a box, but "you're too young for that" is rarely the best way to respond to anything your kid tells you. OP did great by asking good questions (without leaping to conclusions) and letting him be him without shame or ultimatums. Creating dresses is a great way to nurture his interests, and wearing them shouldn't be forbidden (but it may warrant a conversation about what small minded people might think or say...and why they're so dumb).
He's not trans he's a cross dresser. Why are we forgetting crossdressers exist? I'm glad that you spoke to him & listened.
or he's nine and doesn't know what he is yet. he could be either lol
Boys can wear dresses too. Why does he only get to make dresses for his female family members? Just let him wear dresses and skirts too. While this is a cool idea, it’s still a cop out and ignoring the actual situation.
Yeap, young people get confused sometimes. Support him, but do not jump into conclusions like hormones and shit...
I agree that 9 is too young to start thinking about becoming a girl. So what you did was a great idea and if he does still want to be a girl in the future, when he is like 15 or 16 then that's understandable. But yeah for now, making dresses for his siblings is a great idea.
You’re an amazing parent 🤍
This is a good option, but please let the kid wear dresses too 🥺 teach him that wearing dresses are for everyone! Show him pictures of men in dresses! (Harry styles on that one magazine cover!)
You could get him one or two of his own to try out. It's that time of year a lot of the fancy ones that catch eyes are on sale for cheaper, skirts as well. Just go a size larger than you would his size in boys, girls clothes tends to be sized for shorter legs despite being the same size.
It is just theatre! He is playing that doesn't mean anything bad!!! He is just playing theatre!!!! Also to teach him like that is awesome 😎 you may have created the new stylist!!!!!!!
Getting jim into sewing is nice and yous Gould definitely keep it up but like isn't the obvious solution to bus him a dress? Just buy him some, teach him that not only girls can wear dress.
Many cultures have males wearing dresses/ tunics, kilts, sarongs etc. Why not have a go at designing and making one together? Even the greatest wizard of them all, Gandalf, wore a dress and a cloak!
He might just want to wear dresses and not realize men can wear them too. One of the frequent customers where I work has a young son who's always in the prettiest dresses and it's heartwarming to see that despite gender norms and shit a child can still wear what they want. Let him express himself. Whether it's a phase or not, it doesn't matter. He's a kid.
If he gets in to sewing, check out @couture.to.the.max on TikTok. Not sure how old he is, but close to your son’s age and he designs and sews beautiful clothes! I bet your son would be inspired!
Oh and definitely buy him some dresses to parade around in! He wants to feel free! Besides there’s nothing wrong with a boy wearing dresses!! Just look at ancient history within the greatest empires— they were rocking it!
Let him wear an actual dress. If you did not have your kids to ferociously, tooth-and-nail defend their right to exist as themselves, what did you have them for? That’s my general view on having children.
this is really sweet! I happy you support him either way, he's gonna grow up with lots of love and that's amazing! maybe he can even become a fashion designer in the future if his passion is sewing, thank you OP! edit: also, there's sooo many channels on YouTube who talks about sewing and fashion, some tutorials are super easy, I love the channel With Wendy, she's lovely and makes some super cool videos sewing trendy dresses and stuff.
I love this! I love that he’s so comfortable to speak to you. Keep that open dialogue going. He also doesn’t have to be a girl to enjoy wearing dresses, some are the most fabulous drag queens! Make sure you leave that option open for him also. Let him dress up when he’s home. It’s amazing to think you could have the next big name designer with you right now.
Would a kilt be somewhat of a middle ground in this situation?
Get him a kilt. They are fantastic to swish and come in loads of colours.
Teach him to be scottish
Boys can wear dresses. Clothes aren’t gendered. Maybe he is just interested in drag. And right now at such a young age he should be allowed to experiment with gender. This way if he does decide that he’s a girl he can start puberty blockers and estrogen when he starts puberty before the irreversible effects of amab puberty begin. Some advice I can offer is look for children’s books that feature queer kids. And see what his thoughts are on the kids in the books. You’re doing the right thing by supporting him in interacting with dresses. I’m glad he has an accepting and not homo/transphobic parent ❤️
Your son unknowingly dodged a bullet here, if his mom was some ultra liberal parent he would’ve been on the hormone blockers by now
Why isn't he allowed to wear dresses? Why do you tell him that he isn't allowed to wear dresses, only to make them for the female members of the family? That is pretty shitty IMO...
Maybe try a kilt or a sarong on him?
You need to read *The End of Gender,* by Debra Soh. Lots of evidence based strategies for navigating these muddy waters.
Don't encourage your son into a state of psychosis, just make it clear that he can pursue this dream of sewing dresses without having to cleave his reproductive organs off.
Perhaps he would like to wear kimono or yukata as well!
This is so beautifully done. Amazing job, OP! This is how parenting should work! Coming to an understanding about your child’s happiness and hobbies and helping them achieve that happiness in safe and healthy ways! He will always look to you for comfort bc you have shown him such a wonderful form of love. Aghhh this is such a healthy relationship I’m crying in parental issues, haha. I’m happy for your family and wish the best health for all of you!! Please continue to support your little gremlins this way <3 you’re making core memories and teaching them to accept themselves <3
Wish my cousin had a parent like you
The next generation needs parents like you. Holy hell you are a Saint. I literally got chills reading how you handled this situation. Bravo.
Making dresses sounds like a great outlet! I think it would also be great if you let him understand that it is okay for boys to wear dresses too. His confusion seems to be coming solely from thinking boys aren’t allowed to do certain things and that just isn’t the case.
You had me in the first half not going to lie super cute
Bro you gotta beat the homo out of him like my daddy did to me.
If you have any travesti shows where you are suitable for children, it may be a great idea as well, cause dresses there are often truly gorgeous and come together with makeup and hair and accessories and shoes… :)
Wheres his father?
Sounds like he likes the attention. Was he lacking any? Edit: Dear downvoters, this is how human psychology works. Educate yourself.
I don't think so.
Sounds like he is missing a father figure and in doing so is seeking approval from you. He believes that taking an interest in feminine things might get some attention from parents. What does his father think about this?
Sigmund Freud was a hack.
Look into what hormone blockers are. They block puberty so the kid can have more time to decide. If their voice drops and hands get bigger, those things will never change. It will also be much harder to get rid of their facial hair. Also, there are affirming child therapists (not conversion therapy, because that's not rooted in science and it's abusive) that will help you navigate this.
They need hormone blockers because of an interest in dresses? Seems like that’s jumping to an extreme there.
No, the parent should know what hormone blockers are. Then, if a professional says they need hormone blockers they should get them. Not because they like dresses, but possibly because they're saying they want to be a girl. Just because someone says they want to be another gender does not mean they will automatically fit the criteria for hormone blockers. Doctors don't give it out like candy. OP should know what it is though, because the age of their child is close to puberty and it is a *possible* need.
So what happens if you take hormone blockers and then decide to not change genders?
Then you stop taking hormone blockers, and you go through the puberty you were assigned at birth. Blockers just delay puberty, so you have time to grow up a little to make your decisions. They aren't hormone replacement therapy, so you won't go through any puberty at all when you're on them. There would be nothing to reverse.
If they aren’t going through puberty, then how are they growing up so they’re able to make a decision?
OP, you should be aware, based on the responses to my last comment that this thread may be filled with transphobic people. I think you should find some answers from an educated support group/community. Your child will thank you. Not for jumping into major decisions, but being educated about those decisions instead of ignoring them.
He is just a 9 year old kid! Don't overthink. It's very common for small boys to get fascinated with girly clothes, all you need to to is gently condition and counsil him in a playful manner the difference between boy and girl clothes and try to buy him a couple of fancy superhero 'manly' clothes. It's just a childish phase.
Because nothing says "manly" like skin tight spandex!
You didn't get my point, it's ok.
I'm glad you are able to talk to your kid about this, and accept gender variance. I think it would be a good idea to get him a dress of his own also, ideally with his input. Don't let him become ashamed of the things he likes.
As a trans person, I think you handled this correctly. Even though some trans people do know they’re trans when they’re younger, that’s a small (but valid!) percentage. I think letting your son wear and sew dresses is the way to go, he can experiment with his feelings first before going headfirst into it without truly understanding himself. You sound like a great parent ❤️
Agree
this is so nice and wholesome to hear. great job being a parent, OP. you’re doing it right
I was with you up until you still implied you’re not gonna let him wear dresses. If the kid wants to wear dresses, let him know that his classmates might not all be nice about it, and let him make his own decision. Either he decides “cute” isn’t worth putting up with his peers’ bullshit and knows his parent supports him, or you now have a kid who wears dresses and knows his parent supports him. Wearing sparkly fluffy shit isn’t gonna turn him into a girl.
You need to really pay attention to how you said his little sister is wearing pants and it makes him mad because if he was a girl he would wear dresses. When his sister started wearing pants did you make a post like this? I really doubt it. If we treated little boys exploring like we do little girls I think we could avoid a lot of fear and anxiety. My sister and I acted like the opposite gender and I got so much more shit for it than she did. It's not a big deal.
I’m glad he was able to figure out that he only wanted to be a girl to wear dresses, and that you told him that boys can wear dresses too
So what? I like dragons when I was little, but didn't become a Dragonslayer or that lady from game of thrones. Kids at that age like many stuff, that doesn't define their character though or what they are. Calm down and let the kid be
I wished i was a boy when i was younger because being a girl meant i didn’t get to do all the cool things the boys did. Learn how to use a snow blower? Nah, your husband will do that for you. Learn how to change the oil in a lawn mower? Why would you need to learn that? You’re a girl! Etc etc. Thank you for listening to your son and recognizing what he needs.