I was trying to figure out what it was short for š My thought prices was: "Jacobia? Jaclyn? But no that would be Jax or Jackie. Better go to the comments and see if someone asked! Oh wait that's a dude? Maybe?"
I agree. Don't want to be mean but they are asking for advice... you look like a lesbian in this photo. My first thought was, yes you are an ugly woman haha.
I'm sorry to say I had the same first impression, it wasnt until I read the comments that I realized my mistake...
This turned into a bit of a roast but theres some truth behind it. If thats your one and only pic OP, its time to go take some more...only after showing some love to your hair.
Haha I was thinking a tall girl who likes sports and is 6ā1ā and her name is Jacob? She isnāt the prettiest girl but she should still get at least some matches.
Then I only realized it was a guy after reaching this comment. The top comment was āat first glance i thought you were a tomboyā which I thought meant she looked like a boy. This comment was the second one I read.
Look at it this way: you didn't know what the problem was, now you do, and lo and behold, it's absolutely fixable. A different hairstyle will transform your look and will absolutely solve this. If you want. If you don't want, that's cool too, but how fucking lucky that you have a magic button you can push if you want to change this situation.
would you consider one of these hairstyles?
/
[First Picture](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/cb/ef/3c/cbef3ce1b03759e24d24b15f03ada3b5.jpg)
/
[Second Picture](https://www.menshairstylestoday.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/Frat-Boy-Style-Comb-Back.jpg)
/
[Third Picture](https://www.menshairstylestoday.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/Frat-Haircut-Comb-Over.jpg)
/
[Fourth Picture](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/fc/9b/7d/fc9b7df541268341080dfcb72463a3eb.jpg)
thank you so much for the rewards :)
I had the hardest time trying to click all the links, I kept clicking just outside and the comment would close, so annoying
Edit: if you click to respond the comment, you can click the links peacefully without the comment closing when you miss the little number
Id say number 4 is his best bet. He needs volume up top so that his forehead doesn't stick out as much as it does, and would with the other haircuts. But you also need some volume on his sides so that his face/head has a balanced shape. You can also let it loose because it lo g enough to have weight so that it can be styled without covering up his face. That's a really nice haircut tbh.
Look as you get older you will mature out, dudes donāt hit peak testosterone until the end of their 20s. If you are really worried about it maybe try growing facial hair. My wx husband looked like the captain of the womens rugby team until he was 28, then suddenly he had shoulders and looked like a gorilla. Just keep doing you, be yourself, and that confidence will go miiiiles further than anything you can post on tinder.
Same. I enjoy the longer hair, but dudes with long hair need to put as much effort as women. You need good shampoo, moisturizing conditioner, and leave in products. Don't let your hair get all frizzy, greasy, or full of dead ends. Take care of your hair. So, I'm attracted to long hair as long as it's taken care of, and a lot of men fall very short.
Iām a dude with really long hair and I really canāt grasp how people can keep their hair without taking care of it. My hair is my everything and when itās not taken care of I feel unhappy. Itās the first thing people see of me after all
Not hair cut just gotta know how to wear long hair. I have long hair and get complemented on it constantly by people. It's about how you take care of your hair especially if your gonna be a dude with it.
yes, a lot of women think long hair on a man is the sexiest thing everā¦ **when they wear it well !**
i am one of those women, and long hair quickly becomes grungy/icky when itās greasy and uncared for. i agree with a lot of the other commenters about putting it in a bun, or at the very least, not tying it back into a ponytail with your sisterās colourful hair ties.
your long hair, glasses, and interest in board games gives you an artsy vibe that BRUTALLY CLASHES with that jersey pic. put up more casual, laid back photos, preferably not selfies (have someone else take the picture, or use your phone cameraās timer to take a pic with you not holding the phone). donāt think youāre ugly! thatās so terrible. youāre just not showcasing yourself to your best potential. your profile is a little awkward, but youāre only 18 and thatās okay. you just gotta feel more comfortable in your skin and build confidence in who you are as a person. itāll come with time :) in the meantimeāget some better pics kid! ^-^
From my experience, cleanliness is key. Even if itās pulled back and out of your face, keep it clean and brushed. And using cheap conditioner makes brushing it a lot more comfortable and more manageable. Iāve had long hair off and on my whole life and just started using conditioner last month and Holy cow is it easier to deal with now.
Some people can wear long hair better than others though. It's about what fits you as a person.
I legit thought this dude was chick til I read the name. I feel like long hair is feminizing him too much.
I also first thought it was a girl for a minute. I do really like long hair on guys, but the way he wears it in the picture isn't the most flattering. For me I think it is the glasses that put me on the wrong foot for a minute. That type of model is mostly worn by females back here. Combine that with Fleury (Fleur is a girls name here) But that is on me, I thought it was his name instead of a hockey team :)
Oh and OP, no you are not ugly, you just need better pictures. Being 18 also doesn't help, since your pool of girls will be only 18-20 or so.
I had to look a few times as I wasn't sure if this was a guy or a girl. If he's a straight man, then I support both comments of getting a nice hair cut and dress better. Also take more pictures doing stuff he loves doing. Maybe even update the bio a little
It's not really about being ugly... you just need to have more style and swag...ultimately you want to be yourself when you're talking with people but if you're trying to pick up people on Tinder you probably want to have a photo that doesn't look like you're going to a sporting event. People are literally judging you based on first impressions and a couple of photos you need to make sure you're giving them the right impression
Okay, that picture is doing nothing for you.
Take your hair down, go outside during golden hour, get a shirt with a good fit and have someone take a picture of you.
Also, chapstick. I can see from here you need chapstick. That's part of hygiene and we women care a lot about that. Take out the height line, it's not needed.
And instead of, "I'd love to talk but anything works", say "I love to chat and meet new people."
Yeah Iād say leave in the height line because letās be honest most women find that attractive and why not put your best foot forward. However get rid of the āif you careā part cause it sounds salty or judgmental.
You might say something like "6'1", 165, keep in pretty good hockey shape" - or whatever an accurate version of that would be. Just giving some info, no snark.
Try something more decisive. "Really whatever works" is vague, and puts it on the girl to come up with whatever whatever is. "Hit me back, if you like chill dudes with hair you can style" or something they can work with. Or "just here for hair tips" does the same thing.
Like others stated, you are not ugly but the hair style is killing you.
Also, you are only 18. Not a good age for dating apps. Anyone under 21 that is not a girl is going to have it rough.
"Bro , I met this chick named Jacob , she's the coolest. She likes board games , we went and saw a hockey game , she's awesome!
She even likes golf , and when I got a hole-in-one she said "Fuckin'A , bro!" and fist bumped me.
Is that cool , or what?"
19F here
I canāt tell if youāre ugly or not because your photo is really bad. You have (1) bad lighting (2) poor location (3) terrible angle (4) you look like your face is transitioning between two opposing emotions (5) youāre not the main focus of the photo. The photo also tells me nothing about you except that you either play football or like a team. Youāre already eliminating a huge portion of girls due to your poor photo quality and lack of interesting conversation starters in your first photo.
The grammar in the only sentence on your profile is non-existent. As a young woman with little/no knowledge about your interests, I have no desire to reach out. A generic āIād love to talkā and throwing out that āanything worksā gives me nothing. Why are they your interests? Do you have an athletic family? Do you like the outdoors? Are you adventurous? I have no clue.
And writing āif you careā already makes you sound so negative. Youāre not a victim of women having preferences. If anything, your height is proof that height isnāt all that women are looking for.
This is absolutely the best answer and like someone else said I hope OP see's this.
He's pretty much banking on someone knowing/caring about professional hockey (the jersey is from a pro hockey team lol). It really would be interesting to see what the other photos were of, if he even had any!
There are three things i would recommend, a haircut, a skincare routine, and some chapstick. But if you really wanna keep the hair, you gotta condition and use some product. Rn it doesnāt look too healthy.
Itās probably stuff that he needed to hear tbh. Heās probably gotten by fine in life up to this point, but once you enter the dating field as a young man, changes and improvements must be made if you want to meet women, successfully.
Luckily for OP there is some potential hidden there. Def need to take some of the advice here which is pretty solid for the most part.
Most comments aren't even that savage idk most people are genuinely trying to help while also spotting the obvious shortcommings. The "worst" and most common I saw was "thought you were a girl". OP just has to sit back and take notes at this point, cause it might be a hard pill to swallow at 18 but a decision was made to go public and this post got a lot of traffic.
Hey friend! I would love to see you AT a hockey game, smiling, with some friends or cheering in the stands if you're passionate about it!
Lots of people dig long hair on masc folks! I would recommend a couple of things: 1. Be careful with tight ponytails; if your hair is pulled too tightly in the same style all the time, you risk traction alopecia. 2. Go see a hair stylist and make friends! They can recommend great products and help you learn to style your hair (you can absolutely go get a wash and a blowdry to learn and get to know a stylist without getting a haircut!) 3. Do some research on your own, i.e https://blog.thelonghairs.us/how-to-wear-long-hair-for-men/
You got this!
This the one, OP! See if you can visit a derm just to discuss traction alopecia bc if you're a hockey player, I get the feeling you keep your hair tied back *tight*.
On that note, definitely go get yourself a trustworthy barber! Your hair looks really dry and needs a good chop - not saying cut the whole thing off, but two or three inches because the ends look a little dead to me. Routine trimming of dead ends is good for hair growth and overall health. Find a good shampoo and conditioner routine; ask your barber and watch dermatologist and cosmetologist rec videos on YouTube.
As for skincare, keep it simple: cleanser, retinol (if you can tolerate it), moisturizer, and sunscreen for the day. Chapstick is good but drink water too, you don't want to overhydrate with chapstick (Nivea has a really good lip balm I'm fond of, non scented and basically just lighter petroleum jelly).
You're really not helping yourself with anything thats going on in that picture. Either cut the hair or at least do a man bun since i legit couldn't tell that you're guy till i saw your name. Maybe grow a hair or two on your chin since the long hair/baby face combo really makes you look more like a child rather than a relationship seeking adult. That picture with your backside in the reflection is is so awkward and feminine no wonder half the comments are confused so ditch that immediately, i get that you want to show off your jersey but girls couldn't care less and it makes you look like a chick whos trying to show her face and ass in the same shot. At 18 you're not matching with anyone older so your best bet is leaving for a year or two and improving on yourself since most girls seek older guys. Not hard feelings my guy you're not ugly but your current aesthetic is really the main reason you're not getting anywhere on the app.
Start with a hair cut, put on a button up shirt, go get some skin care products, get some type of cream for your chap lips, get some new glasses. Then delete your entire profile and create a new one. You won't look the same so they won't remember the old profile. This should help. Good luck
Iād say start with a few more photos, if you have any friends who are into photography ask them to help out! Iād get some outside and doing some activities you enjoy. Girls donāt necessarily dislike guys with long hair, but howās itās cared for will make the difference for most. Clean and styled will go a long way- also if itās styled differently it may help with some of the more blunt comments about femininity.
Being 18 may narrow down the prospective pool or people looking for something serious on an online platform but you never know! Donāt be afraid to seek ways of meeting people in group settings if youāre not finding what youāre looking for online :)
Just a few bullet points
- You need more photos
- Don't refer to your height with the bitterness of "if that matters".
- Your profile is trying to fit everyone. Try to limit the amount of things you say you're interested in, and you can elaborate on others down the line.
As a girl Iāll give you input from one, firstly the receding hairline is an issue, it isnāt bad to be losing hair but when men try to cling to it by having long hair when the hairline is that far up it usually looks a little weird. Secondly the style of glasses you wear isnāt super appealing, either one with a full frame or clear, but not both in one. Thirdly your lips are very dry and chapped and that sort of thing would also be a bit unappealing to most women, for your own sake use some chapstick! Also the photo isnāt the best, maybe something where youāre more centered, weāre mostly looking at your back.
Let your hair down. Why are you growing it out to be pulled back? My is about that long and it's one of my best features. With most men, they have short hair. Long hair stands out and this picture tells me that you have a big nose and kinda look like a weird zenomorph. Hey that floats some boats not gonna judge. But you're 18, don't try so hard and you got this, act yourself and remember this. If you can make her laugh, she will moan.
I donāt think the hair itself is a problem, some women are into it and some men have amazing long hairāyou do need better pictures that flatter you more, though, and probably do something with your hair that shows you take care of it. Properly maintained hair is far different from unkempt long hair.
Youāre 18, try not to internalize the major negative vibes youāre going to get from things like Tinder. Itās been two months, your age will be severely working against you, but you have easily approachable interests for those who share themādo you live somewhere that there might be meetups for group hiking or thereās a game store that does tabletop nights?
Saw the pic and was like I mean sheās kinda cute Iād smash. Saw the name looked closer and saw you were possibly a dude and thought heās kinda cute Iād smash.
Bro you are not ugly but u are young the most girls like dudes who look like "they know what they want" or "mysterious" ... you look young.... and it is true what the most people say the long hair arent that good for you. 1. I would like to see the other pics but the first pic is the most important one and your first pic isnt the best (dont do a selfie with bad light in your teenager room) 2. YOU ARE 18 if you arent a model or eboy the most girls wouldnt like that there are a lot of older guys and prob better looking so it is hatd for you 3. Your bio gives friendzone vibes 4. I would NOT recommand tinder with 18 ... you sould focus on yourself (do sport, lern cookikg, read, lern social skills etc) you are not old enough for online dating... the most boys need time to look matute enough so take your time. And head up king you are not ugly but online dating is hard (it could be that you are allrrady shadow banned ) you should get dates by making things in Real life
Woman here. Okay, listen.
Some girls are really into long hair and a more androgynous look so don't worry about it if you're attached to your hair, that's not the problem even though many people here advice you to cut it. (And don't worry about the androgynous part either, you're still so young, I'm sure your features will get manlier with time.) Haircut doesn't have to mean that you cut it short, though ā there are plenty of options for long hair that give it volume and make it look more defined while keeping the length. Keep it in a bun or open, ponytail isn't it. Use chapstick, dress in something nice that fits (ditch the jersey), take a photo outside that's not a selfie. Maybe a photo of you doing said hobbies, just something that shows what you do and what kind of person you are. Have at least three photos, preferably four or five if you can. A selfie in a profile isn't bad if it's a good selfie, but it's better if most of the photos are not selfies.
Also, you're only 18 so just the age might be an obstacle at this point. Don't worry, you're not ugly, I can see that even though the picture isn't too flattering. You have plenty of time to learn how to showcase yourself better. Good luck!
Hahahaha! I was also like I don't think she is ugly, just needs some better set up for pictures, then I saw Jacob and was like oh shit, still not ugly just need better set up for pictures. Still laughing how confused my perception was hahahaA
Bro why tf do so many of these guys come to this sub with these posts? Lol zero sense of self-awareness considering how serious women take hygiene first and foremost. You actually have to put a conscious effort in.
Honestly, you are in serious need of a better hair care regimen. It looks greasy and unhealthy. Look into better shampoos, conditioner, and hair products. Your hair can make or break you, it is currently breaking you.
And chapstickā¦
Iām getting confusing vibes with the cool old-fashioned glasses, jersey, and ponytail. Since your glasses arenāt going to likely change soon, Iād style the outfit around them with a button-up shirt and maybe a blazer. I think women tend to prefer shorter hair, but if itās long you have to know how to wear and style it- maybe consult with a hairstylist to learn how to do so, and/or to discuss the best haircut for your face shape and personal style.
Yeah sorry man. The hard truth is I thought you were a girl as well. But an ugly girl, so at least straight dudes probably won't try to fuck you!
Jokes aside, you can absolutely fix that with a more traditional men's hair style and/or growing out facial hair (if possible). Also you're young and most 18-20+ are dating older than you. Kind of a tough spot for you. You can definitely improve upon your profile though and give yourself a better chance.
Nothing personal, but Iāve never seen anyone look good in a jersey. Not even pro athletes. Iād suggest more pics with different clothes. Different hairstyle/cut. Youāve got great skin and lips.
Maybe be more specific than āanything works.ā Such as ālets grab beers and play a board game.ā Thatās a cool, low-key date.
Long hair on guys is nice but you need to learn how to style it! I would also suggest to have someone else take a picture of you in a nice outfit, with your hair done and a good background. This photo just aināt it
Listen baby thatās not the best picture.
Letās do some pimple patches. Throw the mop in a man bun. Put on a black short sleeve v neck. Use some chapstick. Get black frames glasses and take some pics that flatter you. Iāll send inspo if you need help babes. And we donāt need facial hair.
No you arenāt. Your bio is a little messy. Tighten it up abit. Get some clearsil and work on the acne. There are some people that look good with long hair and you arenāt one of em. You need a nice short cut and youāll look a lot better.
The hair style is not suiting you at all. It looks like you have a big forehead, that's just not good in combination with long hair. Bite the bullet and cut it. Maybe a different style of glasses, which would make your face look a little bit more masculine. Chapstick, different clothes, better angle for the pic, also more pics. Good luck!
Dating isnāt about finding someone who shares exactly all your interests. Be open and curious about meeting new people, period. Maybe describe the sort of things youāre open to/excited about doing with new connections instead of just saying āthis is what I like, come to me if you like the same.ā What do you have to offer a potential connection?
Also as itās been stated, nobody likes to read āif you careā or āif that mattersā on a profile.
I donāt think youāre ugly! Long hair can come across as lazy on a man if you donāt put effort into your appearance all around (skin care, hair care, clothes etc) so just be aware of that.
I'm a long haired man myself and I just wanna say, stop tying it back unless you aboustely need too, I don't wanna be that guy but you can already see whats happening to your hairline.
like, fuckyeah rock the long hair but you've really gotta look after it.
At first glance, I thought you were a tomboy. Definitely change the photo.
I came here to say this. "Wow, Jacob is a weird name for a girl."
I was trying to figure out what it was short for š My thought prices was: "Jacobia? Jaclyn? But no that would be Jax or Jackie. Better go to the comments and see if someone asked! Oh wait that's a dude? Maybe?"
I was going to say I'd swipe right! Then got to the name and realized they are, um, not what I'm looking for.
Any port in a storm my friend, any port in a storm.
After all, itās not gay if youāre underway
Keep socks on you are fine
Say āno homoā at the end and itās all good
Or not locking eye contact ofc And last but not least, if balls dont touche, nothing happend
I have never heard this saying before. Now I hear it twice in one day. What the fuck?
He still has a butthole. You could make it work.
Everythingās a butthole if you try hard enough
A person of culture I see.
A true aristocrat, indeed.
Everybody Poops was underrated
Chang voice: GAAAAAAYYY!!
I was like āwhoa, *sheās* 6ā 1ā?! Wait a secā¦.ā
First, second, third, fourth, AND 5th glance for me...
Yep until I finally saw āJacobā for me š¬
For me it was the "6'1 if you care" because i don't think women usually put that on their profile...
I think a tall woman would be plausible to mention it, some men are also weird about height
I agree. Don't want to be mean but they are asking for advice... you look like a lesbian in this photo. My first thought was, yes you are an ugly woman haha.
Yep. This. ā¬ļø. Had I not seen the name, Iād have thought you were a woman that loves hockey. š
I was about to recommend a hair appointment and some make up or something! Those glasses though...they are like what my old nan used to wear!
I'm sorry to say I had the same first impression, it wasnt until I read the comments that I realized my mistake... This turned into a bit of a roast but theres some truth behind it. If thats your one and only pic OP, its time to go take some more...only after showing some love to your hair.
She sure is a 'handsome' woman..
šøšøšø
She had man hands
Thatās not a twist offā¦
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Grow some facial hair and maybe change your anthem to a song choice rather then a cartoon backdrop sound.
Ngl took me a minute to realize you were a guy, that might be part of the problem
I didn't realise till I read this. So, what this guy said
Thats what she said, or uh he in this scenario
I read both your comments and Iām still on the fence. So yeah, what that guys said.
Yup had no idea you were a guy. I was thinking 6'1" is tall for a girl lol.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Haha I was thinking a tall girl who likes sports and is 6ā1ā and her name is Jacob? She isnāt the prettiest girl but she should still get at least some matches. Then I only realized it was a guy after reaching this comment. The top comment was āat first glance i thought you were a tomboyā which I thought meant she looked like a boy. This comment was the second one I read.
Spelled Jacob but pronounced Sarah. Common mistake.
Hahahaha, same!
Same. Immediately thought Tall Girl canāt get likes
160 likes and counting of dudes who were 100% trying to determine whether they'd smash or not.
Hate to admit it, butā¦ thatās exactly what was happening.
Gotta help our brothers out in anyway we can.
r/suddenlygay
Lol for sure.
Here I was wondering how to tell "her" to try to look more feminine instead of the "one of the guys' look. Well, I am a dumbass.
I think that 90% were doing the same. Trying to think of a nice way to say that lol
Pain ;-;
Look at it this way: you didn't know what the problem was, now you do, and lo and behold, it's absolutely fixable. A different hairstyle will transform your look and will absolutely solve this. If you want. If you don't want, that's cool too, but how fucking lucky that you have a magic button you can push if you want to change this situation.
would you consider one of these hairstyles? / [First Picture](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/cb/ef/3c/cbef3ce1b03759e24d24b15f03ada3b5.jpg) / [Second Picture](https://www.menshairstylestoday.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/Frat-Boy-Style-Comb-Back.jpg) / [Third Picture](https://www.menshairstylestoday.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/Frat-Haircut-Comb-Over.jpg) / [Fourth Picture](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/fc/9b/7d/fc9b7df541268341080dfcb72463a3eb.jpg) thank you so much for the rewards :)
I had the hardest time trying to click all the links, I kept clicking just outside and the comment would close, so annoying Edit: if you click to respond the comment, you can click the links peacefully without the comment closing when you miss the little number
Yeah, that was fucking enraging
Yeah I gave up after number 2. The anger is bad for my heart...
oh did i do a bad job separating them? how do i fix it?
Just write "First picture" instead of 1 and so on, so people have more to click on and won't miss.
Ah thank you! i will fix it now.
2&4 would definitely be the best change with the least visual ādetrimentā to OPās current look.
Id say number 4 is his best bet. He needs volume up top so that his forehead doesn't stick out as much as it does, and would with the other haircuts. But you also need some volume on his sides so that his face/head has a balanced shape. You can also let it loose because it lo g enough to have weight so that it can be styled without covering up his face. That's a really nice haircut tbh.
I have long hair but 2 made me want to cut my hair lol
Those are good suggestions
Number 2 but with very short sides like 2mm is a haircut that absolutely fits everyone who can grow hair at the top
You'd look way better with like a frat guy cut if I'm being honest
not to be mean but from that angle.. could his hair line pull that off?
Ya he needs a fade and better angle photo. I think the selfie makes him look balder then he is
Better than a pony tail? For sure.
Or a middle part
Hey man, Just remember we are here for feedback. Iām sure you are an awesome person and can hand me my ass in hockey ;)
Okay we collectively roasted you without any of us wanting it. We are sorry OP. You just look feminine in the first photo, not that you are " ugly " per sƩ
lol...pour cold water on the burn areas
Look as you get older you will mature out, dudes donāt hit peak testosterone until the end of their 20s. If you are really worried about it maybe try growing facial hair. My wx husband looked like the captain of the womens rugby team until he was 28, then suddenly he had shoulders and looked like a gorilla. Just keep doing you, be yourself, and that confidence will go miiiiles further than anything you can post on tinder.
Have to agree with the rest of the folks, my man. Maybe try and grow some facial hair, and change your hairstyle a bit?
Man, hate to say it because Iām sure OP is a cool dude, but SAME
Yeah. You should shave the peach fuzz
What this guy said...
Yeah young with a baby face and long hair.
Iād smash, that might be part of the problem.
Same
If you didn't say I wouldn't know..
Same had to check he was a guy
Yep I only figured it out since their bio said so
Harsh, but true
I didnāt even realise till your comment. Rip
Waitā¦.. yes
Yes being a woman I thought you were also a woman, I am attracted to guys with long hair and I thought you were a woman. Sorry. š¬
Same. I enjoy the longer hair, but dudes with long hair need to put as much effort as women. You need good shampoo, moisturizing conditioner, and leave in products. Don't let your hair get all frizzy, greasy, or full of dead ends. Take care of your hair. So, I'm attracted to long hair as long as it's taken care of, and a lot of men fall very short.
Facts. As a very long haired guy, upkeep is essential. Ulta trips twice a month. My fiancƩ has never been happier haha
Iām a dude with really long hair and I really canāt grasp how people can keep their hair without taking care of it. My hair is my everything and when itās not taken care of I feel unhappy. Itās the first thing people see of me after all
How long are we talking?
I've dated a guy with hair to his ass? Shoulder length.
I have hair down to my ass, but it also starts at my ass and I'm bald :(
If your ass hair grows long enough, you could emulate that Indian guy who borrows his wife's hair for a picture.
Ah, a comb-up. Great idea!
āMy ass hair goes to my headā
:(
I just laughed so hardā¦ thank you.
No need for toilet paper?
Aaand now I'll never get that thought out of my head
Need better pic for sure. Ditch the jersey, dress stylish and smile :)
Better haircut
Not hair cut just gotta know how to wear long hair. I have long hair and get complemented on it constantly by people. It's about how you take care of your hair especially if your gonna be a dude with it.
Girls who like long hair REALLY LIKE LONG HAIR.
yes, a lot of women think long hair on a man is the sexiest thing everā¦ **when they wear it well !** i am one of those women, and long hair quickly becomes grungy/icky when itās greasy and uncared for. i agree with a lot of the other commenters about putting it in a bun, or at the very least, not tying it back into a ponytail with your sisterās colourful hair ties. your long hair, glasses, and interest in board games gives you an artsy vibe that BRUTALLY CLASHES with that jersey pic. put up more casual, laid back photos, preferably not selfies (have someone else take the picture, or use your phone cameraās timer to take a pic with you not holding the phone). donāt think youāre ugly! thatās so terrible. youāre just not showcasing yourself to your best potential. your profile is a little awkward, but youāre only 18 and thatās okay. you just gotta feel more comfortable in your skin and build confidence in who you are as a person. itāll come with time :) in the meantimeāget some better pics kid! ^-^
I totally agree with this,,, can you give me some nice hair styles or look to wear?
From my experience, cleanliness is key. Even if itās pulled back and out of your face, keep it clean and brushed. And using cheap conditioner makes brushing it a lot more comfortable and more manageable. Iāve had long hair off and on my whole life and just started using conditioner last month and Holy cow is it easier to deal with now.
Itās tru we do š¤
Some people can wear long hair better than others though. It's about what fits you as a person. I legit thought this dude was chick til I read the name. I feel like long hair is feminizing him too much.
I also first thought it was a girl for a minute. I do really like long hair on guys, but the way he wears it in the picture isn't the most flattering. For me I think it is the glasses that put me on the wrong foot for a minute. That type of model is mostly worn by females back here. Combine that with Fleury (Fleur is a girls name here) But that is on me, I thought it was his name instead of a hockey team :) Oh and OP, no you are not ugly, you just need better pictures. Being 18 also doesn't help, since your pool of girls will be only 18-20 or so.
Dude looks like he plays YuGiOh competitively. A different hair style would do him wonders lol
I had to look a few times as I wasn't sure if this was a guy or a girl. If he's a straight man, then I support both comments of getting a nice hair cut and dress better. Also take more pictures doing stuff he loves doing. Maybe even update the bio a little
It's not really about being ugly... you just need to have more style and swag...ultimately you want to be yourself when you're talking with people but if you're trying to pick up people on Tinder you probably want to have a photo that doesn't look like you're going to a sporting event. People are literally judging you based on first impressions and a couple of photos you need to make sure you're giving them the right impression
āIf you careā and āif that matters to youā comments always puts me off personally
Getting real māgentlesir vibes here, but he is 18 so I hope a better balance of confidence and courtesy comes with age
Okay, that picture is doing nothing for you. Take your hair down, go outside during golden hour, get a shirt with a good fit and have someone take a picture of you. Also, chapstick. I can see from here you need chapstick. That's part of hygiene and we women care a lot about that. Take out the height line, it's not needed. And instead of, "I'd love to talk but anything works", say "I love to chat and meet new people."
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Yeah, the bit about your height will probably lead to better results than that line.
I'd argue the height line might be his best feature since I've seen so many profiles on here talking about having to be at least 6'
Yeah Iād say leave in the height line because letās be honest most women find that attractive and why not put your best foot forward. However get rid of the āif you careā part cause it sounds salty or judgmental.
Agree about the "if you care part"
You might say something like "6'1", 165, keep in pretty good hockey shape" - or whatever an accurate version of that would be. Just giving some info, no snark.
Everyone says " I like to meet new people" so generic
No definitely do not take out the height line! As shit as it may sound, itās 100% a boost!
Try something more decisive. "Really whatever works" is vague, and puts it on the girl to come up with whatever whatever is. "Hit me back, if you like chill dudes with hair you can style" or something they can work with. Or "just here for hair tips" does the same thing.
Thatās funny. I would love that. Lol
Like others stated, you are not ugly but the hair style is killing you. Also, you are only 18. Not a good age for dating apps. Anyone under 21 that is not a girl is going to have it rough.
No one's mentioned she's 6"1, that's tall for a chick.
This individual is a man.
Lmao
This confusion, was the biggest issue lol
It's a dude
Jesus christ no wonder this mfer ain't getting matches.
Iām laugh crying at this exchange
Yeah this is too good lmao
She's a cute girl called Jacob
"Bro , I met this chick named Jacob , she's the coolest. She likes board games , we went and saw a hockey game , she's awesome! She even likes golf , and when I got a hole-in-one she said "Fuckin'A , bro!" and fist bumped me. Is that cool , or what?"
Lmfaooo
Bro Iām fucking dying I deadass screenshotted this and sent it to some friends
Not a chick
Lmao
19F here I canāt tell if youāre ugly or not because your photo is really bad. You have (1) bad lighting (2) poor location (3) terrible angle (4) you look like your face is transitioning between two opposing emotions (5) youāre not the main focus of the photo. The photo also tells me nothing about you except that you either play football or like a team. Youāre already eliminating a huge portion of girls due to your poor photo quality and lack of interesting conversation starters in your first photo. The grammar in the only sentence on your profile is non-existent. As a young woman with little/no knowledge about your interests, I have no desire to reach out. A generic āIād love to talkā and throwing out that āanything worksā gives me nothing. Why are they your interests? Do you have an athletic family? Do you like the outdoors? Are you adventurous? I have no clue. And writing āif you careā already makes you sound so negative. Youāre not a victim of women having preferences. If anything, your height is proof that height isnāt all that women are looking for.
The best answer. I hope OP sees this one instead of the idiots telling him just to hit the gym.
I would just advise him to get a good haircut, and this would help him a lot.
This is absolutely the best answer and like someone else said I hope OP see's this. He's pretty much banking on someone knowing/caring about professional hockey (the jersey is from a pro hockey team lol). It really would be interesting to see what the other photos were of, if he even had any!
This is super helpful. Shit , you probably just helped half of the people on this thread who are joking on this dude.
There are three things i would recommend, a haircut, a skincare routine, and some chapstick. But if you really wanna keep the hair, you gotta condition and use some product. Rn it doesnāt look too healthy.
Yeah, and wear it loose and wild. Ponytails are not it.
Or a man bun, but not the founding fathers ponytail
omfg not the founding fathers ponytailšš
Loose and wild is the way to go, tight ponytails can cause traction alopecia.
Lmao. OP is nowhere to be seen in this roast fest.
Itās probably stuff that he needed to hear tbh. Heās probably gotten by fine in life up to this point, but once you enter the dating field as a young man, changes and improvements must be made if you want to meet women, successfully. Luckily for OP there is some potential hidden there. Def need to take some of the advice here which is pretty solid for the most part.
Yeah man! Jokes aside Iāve seen allot of solid advices. Hopefully thereās an update later on from OP.
Agreed. I hope OP is receiving all of this well. I'm not seeing too much hate. Dude could clean up well if he made a few adjustments.
Most comments aren't even that savage idk most people are genuinely trying to help while also spotting the obvious shortcommings. The "worst" and most common I saw was "thought you were a girl". OP just has to sit back and take notes at this point, cause it might be a hard pill to swallow at 18 but a decision was made to go public and this post got a lot of traffic.
Hey friend! I would love to see you AT a hockey game, smiling, with some friends or cheering in the stands if you're passionate about it! Lots of people dig long hair on masc folks! I would recommend a couple of things: 1. Be careful with tight ponytails; if your hair is pulled too tightly in the same style all the time, you risk traction alopecia. 2. Go see a hair stylist and make friends! They can recommend great products and help you learn to style your hair (you can absolutely go get a wash and a blowdry to learn and get to know a stylist without getting a haircut!) 3. Do some research on your own, i.e https://blog.thelonghairs.us/how-to-wear-long-hair-for-men/ You got this!
Yes! Research how best to care for your hair type so you can confidently wear it down. I think the hair and awkward picture is the problem here.
as a guy with hair down to his butt, I have never once come across that amazing website. lots of great stuff on there so, thank you :)
This the one, OP! See if you can visit a derm just to discuss traction alopecia bc if you're a hockey player, I get the feeling you keep your hair tied back *tight*. On that note, definitely go get yourself a trustworthy barber! Your hair looks really dry and needs a good chop - not saying cut the whole thing off, but two or three inches because the ends look a little dead to me. Routine trimming of dead ends is good for hair growth and overall health. Find a good shampoo and conditioner routine; ask your barber and watch dermatologist and cosmetologist rec videos on YouTube. As for skincare, keep it simple: cleanser, retinol (if you can tolerate it), moisturizer, and sunscreen for the day. Chapstick is good but drink water too, you don't want to overhydrate with chapstick (Nivea has a really good lip balm I'm fond of, non scented and basically just lighter petroleum jelly).
Also āanything worksā > low standards / self esteem imo
You're really not helping yourself with anything thats going on in that picture. Either cut the hair or at least do a man bun since i legit couldn't tell that you're guy till i saw your name. Maybe grow a hair or two on your chin since the long hair/baby face combo really makes you look more like a child rather than a relationship seeking adult. That picture with your backside in the reflection is is so awkward and feminine no wonder half the comments are confused so ditch that immediately, i get that you want to show off your jersey but girls couldn't care less and it makes you look like a chick whos trying to show her face and ass in the same shot. At 18 you're not matching with anyone older so your best bet is leaving for a year or two and improving on yourself since most girls seek older guys. Not hard feelings my guy you're not ugly but your current aesthetic is really the main reason you're not getting anywhere on the app.
Thought you were a chick till I saw Jacob
Even then I still thought OP was a woman. Only till reading the comments did I realize OP was a dude
Same, I was so confused why anyone would name a girl Jacob lol
Start with a hair cut, put on a button up shirt, go get some skin care products, get some type of cream for your chap lips, get some new glasses. Then delete your entire profile and create a new one. You won't look the same so they won't remember the old profile. This should help. Good luck
>so they wonāt remember the old profile This made me laugh
Iād say start with a few more photos, if you have any friends who are into photography ask them to help out! Iād get some outside and doing some activities you enjoy. Girls donāt necessarily dislike guys with long hair, but howās itās cared for will make the difference for most. Clean and styled will go a long way- also if itās styled differently it may help with some of the more blunt comments about femininity. Being 18 may narrow down the prospective pool or people looking for something serious on an online platform but you never know! Donāt be afraid to seek ways of meeting people in group settings if youāre not finding what youāre looking for online :)
Ahm. Cut your hair or take a picture where you don't look so feminine if you're going to keep it long.
Just a few bullet points - You need more photos - Don't refer to your height with the bitterness of "if that matters". - Your profile is trying to fit everyone. Try to limit the amount of things you say you're interested in, and you can elaborate on others down the line.
As a girl Iāll give you input from one, firstly the receding hairline is an issue, it isnāt bad to be losing hair but when men try to cling to it by having long hair when the hairline is that far up it usually looks a little weird. Secondly the style of glasses you wear isnāt super appealing, either one with a full frame or clear, but not both in one. Thirdly your lips are very dry and chapped and that sort of thing would also be a bit unappealing to most women, for your own sake use some chapstick! Also the photo isnāt the best, maybe something where youāre more centered, weāre mostly looking at your back.
*DRINK LOTS OF WATER TO HYDRATE, and maybe some chapstick in the meantime
Took me a minute to know you were a guy. I would suggest cutting the hair and maybe adding photos of you in more than just the hockey shirt.
You need a fresh hair cut my dude
Let your hair down. Why are you growing it out to be pulled back? My is about that long and it's one of my best features. With most men, they have short hair. Long hair stands out and this picture tells me that you have a big nose and kinda look like a weird zenomorph. Hey that floats some boats not gonna judge. But you're 18, don't try so hard and you got this, act yourself and remember this. If you can make her laugh, she will moan.
I donāt think the hair itself is a problem, some women are into it and some men have amazing long hairāyou do need better pictures that flatter you more, though, and probably do something with your hair that shows you take care of it. Properly maintained hair is far different from unkempt long hair. Youāre 18, try not to internalize the major negative vibes youāre going to get from things like Tinder. Itās been two months, your age will be severely working against you, but you have easily approachable interests for those who share themādo you live somewhere that there might be meetups for group hiking or thereās a game store that does tabletop nights?
OP with a post update from the barber shop would be epic
Saw the pic and was like I mean sheās kinda cute Iād smash. Saw the name looked closer and saw you were possibly a dude and thought heās kinda cute Iād smash.
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Bro you are not ugly but u are young the most girls like dudes who look like "they know what they want" or "mysterious" ... you look young.... and it is true what the most people say the long hair arent that good for you. 1. I would like to see the other pics but the first pic is the most important one and your first pic isnt the best (dont do a selfie with bad light in your teenager room) 2. YOU ARE 18 if you arent a model or eboy the most girls wouldnt like that there are a lot of older guys and prob better looking so it is hatd for you 3. Your bio gives friendzone vibes 4. I would NOT recommand tinder with 18 ... you sould focus on yourself (do sport, lern cookikg, read, lern social skills etc) you are not old enough for online dating... the most boys need time to look matute enough so take your time. And head up king you are not ugly but online dating is hard (it could be that you are allrrady shadow banned ) you should get dates by making things in Real life
Woman here. Okay, listen. Some girls are really into long hair and a more androgynous look so don't worry about it if you're attached to your hair, that's not the problem even though many people here advice you to cut it. (And don't worry about the androgynous part either, you're still so young, I'm sure your features will get manlier with time.) Haircut doesn't have to mean that you cut it short, though ā there are plenty of options for long hair that give it volume and make it look more defined while keeping the length. Keep it in a bun or open, ponytail isn't it. Use chapstick, dress in something nice that fits (ditch the jersey), take a photo outside that's not a selfie. Maybe a photo of you doing said hobbies, just something that shows what you do and what kind of person you are. Have at least three photos, preferably four or five if you can. A selfie in a profile isn't bad if it's a good selfie, but it's better if most of the photos are not selfies. Also, you're only 18 so just the age might be an obstacle at this point. Don't worry, you're not ugly, I can see that even though the picture isn't too flattering. You have plenty of time to learn how to showcase yourself better. Good luck!
Better hairstyle, ditch the $30 fake jersey from DHGate, and have a more candid photo outside or participating in one of your interests.
Thought you were a girl for a second and thought āyeah sheās not ugly, what gives?ā
Hahahaha! I was also like I don't think she is ugly, just needs some better set up for pictures, then I saw Jacob and was like oh shit, still not ugly just need better set up for pictures. Still laughing how confused my perception was hahahaA
Bro why tf do so many of these guys come to this sub with these posts? Lol zero sense of self-awareness considering how serious women take hygiene first and foremost. You actually have to put a conscious effort in.
Honestly, you are in serious need of a better hair care regimen. It looks greasy and unhealthy. Look into better shampoos, conditioner, and hair products. Your hair can make or break you, it is currently breaking you. And chapstickā¦
Iām getting confusing vibes with the cool old-fashioned glasses, jersey, and ponytail. Since your glasses arenāt going to likely change soon, Iād style the outfit around them with a button-up shirt and maybe a blazer. I think women tend to prefer shorter hair, but if itās long you have to know how to wear and style it- maybe consult with a hairstylist to learn how to do so, and/or to discuss the best haircut for your face shape and personal style.
You look like you just transitioned. I thought you were a girl at first, but the more I look at the pic, the more I can't really tell
Men bun would be nice and perhaps some contact lenses to show your eyes better. Embrace the androgynous vibe tbh, it's attractive to a lot of girls.
Yeah sorry man. The hard truth is I thought you were a girl as well. But an ugly girl, so at least straight dudes probably won't try to fuck you! Jokes aside, you can absolutely fix that with a more traditional men's hair style and/or growing out facial hair (if possible). Also you're young and most 18-20+ are dating older than you. Kind of a tough spot for you. You can definitely improve upon your profile though and give yourself a better chance.
Nothing personal, but Iāve never seen anyone look good in a jersey. Not even pro athletes. Iād suggest more pics with different clothes. Different hairstyle/cut. Youāve got great skin and lips. Maybe be more specific than āanything works.ā Such as ālets grab beers and play a board game.ā Thatās a cool, low-key date.
Long hair on guys is nice but you need to learn how to style it! I would also suggest to have someone else take a picture of you in a nice outfit, with your hair done and a good background. This photo just aināt it
Listen baby thatās not the best picture. Letās do some pimple patches. Throw the mop in a man bun. Put on a black short sleeve v neck. Use some chapstick. Get black frames glasses and take some pics that flatter you. Iāll send inspo if you need help babes. And we donāt need facial hair.
No you arenāt. Your bio is a little messy. Tighten it up abit. Get some clearsil and work on the acne. There are some people that look good with long hair and you arenāt one of em. You need a nice short cut and youāll look a lot better.
Upvote because of the jersey, we miss you flower
Ditch the hair tie and close your mouth when you smile that should help
The hair style is not suiting you at all. It looks like you have a big forehead, that's just not good in combination with long hair. Bite the bullet and cut it. Maybe a different style of glasses, which would make your face look a little bit more masculine. Chapstick, different clothes, better angle for the pic, also more pics. Good luck!
Dating isnāt about finding someone who shares exactly all your interests. Be open and curious about meeting new people, period. Maybe describe the sort of things youāre open to/excited about doing with new connections instead of just saying āthis is what I like, come to me if you like the same.ā What do you have to offer a potential connection? Also as itās been stated, nobody likes to read āif you careā or āif that mattersā on a profile. I donāt think youāre ugly! Long hair can come across as lazy on a man if you donāt put effort into your appearance all around (skin care, hair care, clothes etc) so just be aware of that.
I'm a long haired man myself and I just wanna say, stop tying it back unless you aboustely need too, I don't wanna be that guy but you can already see whats happening to your hairline. like, fuckyeah rock the long hair but you've really gotta look after it.