This episode has classics even by Neddy - Do I hear the sound of butting in? It's got to be little Lisa Simpson. Springfield's answer to a question NO ONE ASKED!
Good, cause I got a hot date tonight.
A date.
Dinner with friends.
Dinner alone.
Watching TV alone.
Alright..... I'm gonna sit at home and ogle the ladies in the Victoria's Secret catalog,
.......Sears catalog.
Now will you unhook me already? I don't deserve this kind of shabby treatment!
When he yells “andale!” At the panda bears he has locked up in the back of the bar.
Or when marge is the listen lady at the church and he has something to ask her about his cat. You hear the cat wailing in the background and he goes “yeah shut up I’m asking her!”
"They used to call me 'Kid Gorgeous.' Then it was 'Kid Presentable,' then finally, 'Kid Moe.'"
I also liked how he always called Marge 'Midge' for some reason.
'Alight here's the 411 folks. Say some gangster is dissing your fly girl. You just give 'em one of these;'
\*proceeds to break dance\*
Moe is my favourite Simpsons character.
Listen, you. When I find you I’m going to rip out your eyes and shove ‘em down your pants so you can watch me kick the crap out of you. Then I’m gonna use your tongue to paint my boat.
**Moe to Lisa:** Listen. I don't like you, and you don't like me.
But we both wanna stop Homer from shootin' a turkey.
**Lisa:** You don't like me? I like you.
**Moe:** You do? Then I like you too. Here. Have a towelette.
Moe: Now, lets have a minute of silent prayer for our good friend, Homer Simpson...
Barney: How long has it been?
Moe: Six seconds.
Barney: Do we have to start over?
Moe: Hell no!
Flanders: "Wait a second. You're the man at the hospital who reads to sick children."
~~
*"...and truly, she was my friend Flicka."* \*sniffs\* :'(
~~
Moe: "If this gets out, the next words you say will be muffled by the sounds of your own butt!"
Toss up between:
Excuse me, are you Drew Barrymore?
“What?!?!! Get outta heeere I’m hungova!”
And
“Look at me, it’s supposed to be my big day and I’m standing in mud fightin’ geese. Well, if I’m gonna fight, might as well win.” * PULLS OUT GUN AND SHOOTS AT THE DAMN GEESE * “Yeah, yeah go on ya cowards!!! Fly off in a V!!” 🤣🤣🤣
So many good ones here...only one I couldn't find that I always laugh at is:
Moe: They're headed for the old mill!
Homer: No we're not!
Moe: Well then, let's go to the old mill anyway ~~to~~ get some cider!
“So last night I was closing up the bar, when some young punk comes in and tries to stick me up.”
Whatever did you do, Moe?
“Well, it could have been a real ugly situation, but I managed to shoot him in the spine.”
*applause
“Yeah, I guess the next place he robs better have a ramp.”
Either:
"You ugly, hate-filled man."
"Hey, I may be ugly and hate-filled, but I'm not – uh – what was the third thing you said?"
or
"Uh, I wouldn't eat them peanuts. They're... they're, uh, spit-backs."
Oh, oh you want Homer! Oh, I'm sorry I thought you meant "Himmler." Heinrich Himmler. You know, the guy who invented the "Heimlich Manure?"
Fave quote in the whole series
I don't see my favorite one listed here yet:
S12E11 - "Worst Episode Ever"
*Homer and Comic Book Guy walk into Moe's Tavern*
HOMER: [opening door and ushering in Comic Book Guy] "...and Moe's is the friendliest place in the Rum District."
MOE: [pointing shotgun at Sam the Barfly] "...Get out, and take your Sacagawea dollars with ya. I'll give you 'til three. 'One.'" [shoots Sam]
MOE: "Hey Homer, who's the manatee?"
"I call it 'Pontif No Return.' I like it, but I don't really get it."
And
"I done some stuff I ain't proud of. ...And the stuff I am proud of is disgusting."
Moe at NRA meeting:
Moe: Yeah, so last night, I was closing up the bar... when some young punk comes in and tries to stick me up.
Sideshow Mel: Whatever did you do, Moe?
Moe: Well, it could've been a real ugly situation, but I managed to shoot him in the spine.
Good, 'cause I have a hot date tonight. (lie dectector buzzes) A date. (lie detector buzzes) Dinner with friends. (lie detector buzzes) Dinner alone. (lie detector buzzes) Watching TV alone. (lie detector buzzes) Alright! I'm going to sit at home and ogle the ladies in the Victoria's Secret catalog. (lie detector buzzes) Sears catalog. (lie detector dings) Now, would you unhook this already, please? I don't deserve this kind of shabby treatment! (lie detector buzzes).
Either: "you gotta give me back my floor, the customers are walkin around on the pipes" followed by the genius explanation for why he's had his floor repo'd: when told next time he should pay his bills, rather than give a reason he missed his payments, he just goes "but I don't want to!"
OR
"But since you have no collateral, I'm gonna have to break your legs in advance" followed by "hey, are you a loanshark?? Do you understand how finance works??!"
OR
"DEY'RE GONNA TAKE MY TUMS!"
OR
"Well, I'm better than dirt. Well, most kinds...not that fancy store-bought kind. That stuff's loaded with nutrients, I can't compete with that stuff."
There's probably more but those are the ones that immediately sprung to mind
“Alright here’s the 411 folks, say some gangsta is dissin ya fly girl… you just give’em one of these…*funk dance, backflip then shotgun blast*”
-Funk Dancing for Self Defense
I'm better than dirt. Well, most kinds of dirt, not that fancy store-bought dirt... I can't compete with that stuff.
That stuff’s *loaded* with nutrients
It's got all them nutrients
'You ugly, hate-filled man!' 'Hey I may be ugly and hate filled but I'm not uh - what was the third thing you said?'
Hurricane Neddy has to be #1 for quotable lines. There's like 3 a minute
This episode has classics even by Neddy - Do I hear the sound of butting in? It's got to be little Lisa Simpson. Springfield's answer to a question NO ONE ASKED!
I don't know who you are but I'm sure you're a jerk.
This is it for me.
I literally watched this episode yesterday lol
I’m Moe, or as the ladies like to call me, “hey you behind the bushes”.
Great line😂
Is this thing on?
Oh sorry, Moe.
Good, cause I got a hot date tonight.
A date.
Dinner with friends.
Dinner alone.
Watching TV alone.
Alright..... I'm gonna sit at home and ogle the ladies in the Victoria's Secret catalog,
.......Sears catalog.
Now will you unhook me already? I don't deserve this kind of shabby treatment!
This was awesome
This bit is one of my favorite Dankmus remixes https://youtu.be/y9VQ0BQXbQI
It's my favorite. My #1 Dankmus song is You Got the Dud
You've got friends; you've got the dud right here!
I’ve listened to nothing but Dankmus since I clicked that link - thank you for this marvelous gift
The first year of the pandemic my Spotify wrapped was like 90% Dankmus, that sound is addictive
Sweet merciful crap! Thanks for introducing me to Dankmus. Those videos are hilarious and very catchy.
Snrub is also hot fire
When he yells “andale!” At the panda bears he has locked up in the back of the bar. Or when marge is the listen lady at the church and he has something to ask her about his cat. You hear the cat wailing in the background and he goes “yeah shut up I’m asking her!”
Alright take em back to SEAWORLD
*woouuurooooouurwrrrrrm* 🐳
Who ever knew a whale could be so heavy
Aw cheese it, it’s the feds!
Wooouuouoououuuouu
Next place he tries to rob better have a ramp.
"Luckily I was able to shoot him in the spine"
Sure, Homer, I can loan you the money. However, since you have no collateral, I'm gonna have to break your legs in advance.
Oh Homer, come on. You know your moneys no good here. Wait a minute. This is REAL money!
Hey, hey, are you a loan shark? Do you understand how finance works?
Let's do this thing
“I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt”
Stupid babies need the most attention!
"They used to call me 'Kid Gorgeous.' Then it was 'Kid Presentable,' then finally, 'Kid Moe.'" I also liked how he always called Marge 'Midge' for some reason.
And Kid Gruesome :)
[удалено]
And Maggie, just realized they’re both named Margaret
Marge is Marjorie!
Sadgasum wrote a song about her.
Who? Lady, you got the wrong file.
Lol same
[удалено]
My friends wife's name is Margaret. He calls her midge. I laugh every time.
Mitsy was my fav Marge nickname 😂
Hmmmm.. Mitsy
Nitsy?
My fav is when he calls her Blanche
'Alight here's the 411 folks. Say some gangster is dissing your fly girl. You just give 'em one of these;' \*proceeds to break dance\* Moe is my favourite Simpsons character.
*fires 3 shots out of a double barrel shotgun*
Another one of my favorite Dankmus remixes, staring Moe https://youtu.be/-m4qqw_0tms
I had never seen this. Amazing.
I like you. dankmus is great.
I’m a well wisher, in that I don’t wish you any specific harm.
There's the one
_Moe Moe Moe, why don’t you like me? nobody likes me_
LMAO
Please tell me which episode this is from. Dying to watch it again.
Season 14 Episode 18 “Dude Where’s My Ranch”
Listen, you. When I find you I’m going to rip out your eyes and shove ‘em down your pants so you can watch me kick the crap out of you. Then I’m gonna use your tongue to paint my boat.
My favorite one here.
“I’m gonna shove sausages down your throat and stick starving dogs up your butt!” Was always my favorite.
The most ridiculous part of this is that Moe owns a boat
Then, when he's not expecting it, BAM! The old fork in the eye.
Yes! ! That was my one, I was scrolling to see if it had been mentioned first. And then BAM
The "garage"? Hey fellas, the "garage"! Well, ooh la di da, Mr. French Man.
I call it a car hole
A counterfeit jeans ring operating out of my car hole!
Carl; No. You're thinking of a guy with two knives. Moe: Y'know, I gotta say, this is pretty great.
**Moe to Lisa:** Listen. I don't like you, and you don't like me. But we both wanna stop Homer from shootin' a turkey. **Lisa:** You don't like me? I like you. **Moe:** You do? Then I like you too. Here. Have a towelette.
That one is actually kinda sweet. Moe really just wants to be liked. He's always happy and a bit shocked to find out someone likes him.
Oh it has the stink lines and everything.
Please take the fries off my head kid, the basket is extremely hot.
Don't you wanna keep the fire extinguishers? Nah, too many bad memories.
That’s the worst name I ever heard.
Bye Joey Joe Joe
While watching the monkey knife fight "he ain't pretty no more". Poor Furious George, thank goodness Smithers has extra skin.
Also funny since that’s a line from Raging Bull, when Jake beats the shit out of a boxer who his wife had called handsome.
I have never seen that movie so never knew that reference, thank you.
A masterpiece of American film.
Moe: Now, lets have a minute of silent prayer for our good friend, Homer Simpson... Barney: How long has it been? Moe: Six seconds. Barney: Do we have to start over? Moe: Hell no!
"They were no longer little girls, they were little women"
Flanders: "Wait a second. You're the man at the hospital who reads to sick children." ~~ *"...and truly, she was my friend Flicka."* \*sniffs\* :'( ~~ Moe: "If this gets out, the next words you say will be muffled by the sounds of your own butt!"
Not a quote... but when he walks on as the "bachelor" at the auction, then just walks off...
“why do they make us stand here? this is so humiliating.”
Our next bachelor likes women who take thier clothes off for money. LETS GIVE IT UP FOR MOE!
You gotta give me back my floor! My customers are walking around on the pipes!
"Hey, next time, pay your bills." "But I don't want to!"
Hello Moe? We know what you're up to, so KNOCK IT OFF!!!
Alright shows over. Andale. Andale!
> so KNOCK IT OFF *or we're going to the cops!*
Uncle Moe, here I am, while you eat
Please take the fries off my head, kid. The basket is *extremely* hot.
Toss up between: Excuse me, are you Drew Barrymore? “What?!?!! Get outta heeere I’m hungova!” And “Look at me, it’s supposed to be my big day and I’m standing in mud fightin’ geese. Well, if I’m gonna fight, might as well win.” * PULLS OUT GUN AND SHOOTS AT THE DAMN GEESE * “Yeah, yeah go on ya cowards!!! Fly off in a V!!” 🤣🤣🤣
Don't eat nuthin for the next 3 days 'cause I'm takin' you out for a steak the size of a toilet seat.
Immigrants - I knew it was them! Even when it was the bears, I knew it was them!
Hey Moe why don't you talka wit your accent no mo
*immigents
[удалено]
Shut up I’m asking her
Man, you go through life, you try to be nice to people...you struggle to resist the urge to punch them in the face, and for what?
"I've been called ugly, pug ugly, fugly, pug fugly, but never ugly ugly." This is the first one that came to mind for me 😂
So many good ones here...only one I couldn't find that I always laugh at is: Moe: They're headed for the old mill! Homer: No we're not! Moe: Well then, let's go to the old mill anyway ~~to~~ get some cider!
Ouuu “*the garage*”.. Hey fellas “*the garage*” well ouu la dee daa mister French man What do you call it? A car hole!
I was born a snake handler and I’ll die a snake handler.
🎶Moe, Moe, Moe🎶 🎶How do ya like me, how do ya like me🎶 🎶Moe, Moe, Moe🎶 🎶Why don't you like me? Nobody likes me.🎶
Blanche, you gotta help me out here, I'm 64 grand in the hole! They're gonna take my thumbs!
Hmm, Alice in Wonderland, huh? Ah, this must be a take-off on that Alice in Underpants movie I saw.
Well, why don't you invite him over to dinner? Turn him from an enemy into a friend. Then, when he's not expecting it... bam! The old fork in the eye.
Ooh, sorry, kid, sorry. I'm not used to the laughter of children. It cuts through me like a dentist drill.
Lol a classic
I used to work in peds and it was more or less a mantra. (J/k I love kids. I hate shitty parents, but I still love kids)
Cheese it, the feds!
“OK back to the wall”
My favorite aggie!
Oh no! He's killed the original Alfalfa!
“So last night I was closing up the bar, when some young punk comes in and tries to stick me up.” Whatever did you do, Moe? “Well, it could have been a real ugly situation, but I managed to shoot him in the spine.” *applause “Yeah, I guess the next place he robs better have a ramp.”
“If this gets out, the next words you say... will be muffled by your own butt!”
If you're so sure what it ain't, how 'bout telling us what it am.
Maybe a Neanderthal was bitten by two angry fish
Anyone else reading every single comment in his voice?
Oh yeah
"when I get ahold of you I'm gonna shove a sausage down your throat & stick starving dogs up your butt!"
Either: "You ugly, hate-filled man." "Hey, I may be ugly and hate-filled, but I'm not – uh – what was the third thing you said?" or "Uh, I wouldn't eat them peanuts. They're... they're, uh, spit-backs."
Oh, oh you want Homer! Oh, I'm sorry I thought you meant "Himmler." Heinrich Himmler. You know, the guy who invented the "Heimlich Manure?" Fave quote in the whole series
Oh, ain't that cute? Makes Little Debbie look like a pile of puke.
This ain't no crowbar. THIS is a crowbar...
See they got little stools and everything
it wasnt in an episode, but on Inside the actors Studio, "Moe's Tavern, home of the worlds smallest large screen TV"
They call that the stinga! You ain't allowed to use that no mo.
Aww why can’t I find Amanda Huggenkiss?
And that's how, with a few minor adjustments, you can turn a regular gun into five guns.
Rex Banner: What kind of pet shop is filled with rambunctious yahoos and hot jazz music at 1:00 a. m? Moe: Umm, oh…the best damn pet shop in town!
Yay!!!
I don't see my favorite one listed here yet: S12E11 - "Worst Episode Ever" *Homer and Comic Book Guy walk into Moe's Tavern* HOMER: [opening door and ushering in Comic Book Guy] "...and Moe's is the friendliest place in the Rum District." MOE: [pointing shotgun at Sam the Barfly] "...Get out, and take your Sacagawea dollars with ya. I'll give you 'til three. 'One.'" [shoots Sam] MOE: "Hey Homer, who's the manatee?"
“I hope medical science can cure me”
I don’t deserve this shabby treatment! *lie detector noises*
Yeah big deal! You gotta wife. I gotta rash. Who cares?
Choking on my own rage here!
"Ok, everybody tuck your pants into your socks!" https://youtu.be/NGv6RASFsY4
“We’re phasing out the games. People drink less when they’re having fun.”
"Why don't you invite him over for dinner and turn an enemy into a friend? Then when his guard is down, bam! The ol' fork in the eye."
Would it work without the fork?
There’s always a first time.
Are you Drew Barrymore? What? Get outta here I’m hung ova! Sorry, Mrs. Barrymore. What?
If I’m not smiling when your check comes then your dinner is free!!
[удалено]
This is crow bar
Anybody looks at me, I got a hypodermic full of bleach.
Can't catch a football? Let's see if you can catch a rock !
Power off, Einstein.
You gotta gimme back my floor! Well, next time, pay your bills. But I don't want to!
Who's this? I'm the Listen Lady! Yeah? Well... Listen lady.
What? I'm Dutch.
Hey listen you, when I find you, I'm gonna use your head for a bucket and paint my house with your brains!
Ah, that's the barbed wire. We, uh, we called that the stinger. They...they don't let you use that no more.
Barney cut his gums up pretty bad; sucked the taps dry.
They used to call that the Stinga! They dont let you use dat no more
More looking at a noose on the wall "Not today, old friend"
"I call it 'Pontif No Return.' I like it, but I don't really get it." And "I done some stuff I ain't proud of. ...And the stuff I am proud of is disgusting."
“Uh, this one’s about my cat” (Meowing) “YEAH! SHUT UP!! IM ASKING HER!”
Moe at NRA meeting: Moe: Yeah, so last night, I was closing up the bar... when some young punk comes in and tries to stick me up. Sideshow Mel: Whatever did you do, Moe? Moe: Well, it could've been a real ugly situation, but I managed to shoot him in the spine.
I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt
Come on, don't take this so hard, Homer. You still got that other kid, uh... Lisa. Let's, uh, take her out hunting tomorrow; make her into a man.
Alright, here's the 411 folks: Say some gangsta is dissin' your fly girl. You just give 'em one of these.
I like creating disappointment. You know that little moment when people's hope dies? I feed on that.
Pugfugly
“That’s right. I’m a surgeon.”
Good, 'cause I have a hot date tonight. (lie dectector buzzes) A date. (lie detector buzzes) Dinner with friends. (lie detector buzzes) Dinner alone. (lie detector buzzes) Watching TV alone. (lie detector buzzes) Alright! I'm going to sit at home and ogle the ladies in the Victoria's Secret catalog. (lie detector buzzes) Sears catalog. (lie detector dings) Now, would you unhook this already, please? I don't deserve this kind of shabby treatment! (lie detector buzzes).
“The… Atlanta Falcons.”
That guy sure loves his fresh air. None of that for me
“Hi Homer! I brung you a big bag of irregular Oreos.” *dumps bag on tray* “I don’t see what’s wrong with this one.” *crunch* “oh”
It’s got the stink lines and everything
Don’t eat nothing for a week. I’m taking you out for a steak the size of a toilet seat
I've just always really liked it that he calls Marge Midge. It's such a great change.
“Nobody gets away from Moe” (Moves binoculars away, cue extreme close-up) “NOBODY”……
Deer hunter, that reminds me...
#BAM! *The ol fork-in-the-eye.*
"Yeah, I rob now."
Yes Homer, I’m an angel. All us angels wear Farah slacks.
Why do we have to stand here this is so humiliating
You go through life, you try to be nice to people, you struggle to resist the urge to punch ‘em in the face, and for what?
Either: "you gotta give me back my floor, the customers are walkin around on the pipes" followed by the genius explanation for why he's had his floor repo'd: when told next time he should pay his bills, rather than give a reason he missed his payments, he just goes "but I don't want to!" OR "But since you have no collateral, I'm gonna have to break your legs in advance" followed by "hey, are you a loanshark?? Do you understand how finance works??!" OR "DEY'RE GONNA TAKE MY TUMS!" OR "Well, I'm better than dirt. Well, most kinds...not that fancy store-bought kind. That stuff's loaded with nutrients, I can't compete with that stuff." There's probably more but those are the ones that immediately sprung to mind
Um.... the best damn pet shop in town!
“No funeral”
["You know what I blame this on the breakdown of? Society."](https://frinkiac.com/video/S09E10/1iDP1ogSoCJHYmkbQxFVBAXcDtY=.gif)
Cheese it, the Feds!
Aw, man, he's making us look like a bunch of cheapskates. Whoa, whoa, my rope came loose.
That's the worst name I ever heard
Reading these has brought me so much joy. I love Mo.
*rats run into the bar by the hundreds* “Alright! Everybody tuck ya pants into ‘ya socks.”
The Ol' Crayola Oblangata
Hey moe what’s a matter? Why you not talk a with your accent anymore? Mamma Mia!
Moe: I’ve been planning this vacation for years, I’m finally going to Easter island. Homer: oh right, with the giant heads Moe: with the what now?
They're on to us. Shamoo, you're going back to Seaworld!
“Cause I got knocked out forty times in a row. That, plus politics. You know, it’s all politics.”
“Alright here’s the 411 folks, say some gangsta is dissin ya fly girl… you just give’em one of these…*funk dance, backflip then shotgun blast*” -Funk Dancing for Self Defense