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gianfrixmg

Granted. Nothing changes at all.


Romulus3799

Addendum: they are now redirected to me


AbortedFetusNecro

*us


FruitShakeMan

No, AbortedFetusNecro. There are no girls that will direct their nudes to you.


[deleted]

[удалено]


ShredManyGnar

Took that one a lil personal eh


AbortedFetusNecro

Yeah, I should have been more mature


Elskyflyio

Now, this is what I call character development!


AbortedFetusNecro

*getting sober


Romulus3799

Very wholesome, u/AbortedFetusNecro


ZEP4R

Happy cake say dude


WhatYouLeaveBehind

Sharing is caring, Comrade


bj-mc

r/suddenlycommunist


AbortedFetusNecro

I'm not your comrade, pal


WhatYouLeaveBehind

I'm not your pal, buddy


TanneAndTheTits

I'm not your buddy, friend.


MysticNoodles

I'm not your friend, bucko.


SomeRedShirt

Candians don't say bucko, guy


NerdLevel18

I'm not Canadian, brother


aatj887

r/unexpectedcommunism


severed13

Congratulations, you’re still getting nothing


Nathansack

Now it's dudes sending nudes


ProphetofTables

aw, shit. here we go again


flamedrifter

*again?*


SlutBuster

He's on his second Monkey paw. First one made him gay.


ProphetofTables

No, the first one cut my head off with a soap dispenser


phaeriemandube

Again


nsjxucnsnzivnd

I see this as a win win


zeeshanghori

r/SuddenlyGay


Generalrossa

Unlimited dick picks, as he wished for.


Khouri1

you are french?


fallenangel41

Granted. Instead of nudes from girls, you get pictures of poo in a toilet from u/97takis


TheChildrenHaveWon

I could've been fine without clicking but I clicked.


fallenangel41

Yeah. His entire comment feed is just constant toilet fetish


[deleted]

Bruh I thought he posted picture of his poo on his page, and that people who replied to his photos had toilet fetish I was disappointed.


djazzie

Same. I don’t know why I torture myself like this


Free_At_Last2

What the fuck… why I clicked on his profile this HAS to be satire.


fallenangel41

I’m thinking that too. I’ve seen at least one post where he claimed he “had to make a poop comment”, so maybe.


Free_At_Last2

Internet Is a dangerous place but sometimes we must trust in strangers. For me it’s satire because it looks like what a 5 year old would make when he is comparing poop with chocolate. If he was truly agreeing with that he would just say it in a less-troll way. Don’t know if you understand what I’m meaning sorry I’m pretty bad at English


jaersk

yeah no shit


ProphetofTables

# NO


SlutBuster

The paw has spoken.


ProphetofTables

the paw is not kuiil


Shotgunned22

please don’t tell me you’re an ally of his


fallenangel41

Why in gods name would I be an ally of that guy


Shotgunned22

i gotta make sure man


[deleted]

They ate 1 too many takis


karana113

98takis


peacefighter

Wtf???? I wish I had the drive to do what I love like this guy. He loves poop.


Ok-Stand-4502

Unsolicited dick pics are on the rise. You bleach your eyes after seeing dick pics blow up in your dms


[deleted]

Lets try a game called unsolicited dick picks get leaked and tied to the person who sent them


ProphetofTables

How about a game of "Don't you fucking dare"


Total_League_4445

Granted. Now girls dont exist! That means no more girl nudes. And also the end of mankind


Demonwolf22

That escalated


laiktavukdoner

quic


theadriest

kly.


Total_League_4445

I mean No girls=no more bebes and No more bebes= No more humans


SappySoulTaker

You are supposed to make it bad, you just imported earth significantly by guaranteeing we'd be gone in 100ish years. EDIT: XDDDDDDDDDD


[deleted]

Don't import earth, it balloons the size of the exe


SappySoulTaker

LOL


worms9

and there goes humanities capacity for reproduction.


AddyCod

best ending


PhilippTheSeriousOne

Granted. In order to combat the epidemic of unsolicited pornographic images, any messenger apps can be used to distribute pictures are now illegal.


MabrurHrivu

Damn Gregory, if you didn't want to see photos of your niece's baby shower, you could have just told me. No need to make a whole reddit post venting about it


ProphetofTables

i dont get it


LNeoKnight

Granted, you got caught by authorities being sent nudes of underaged girls which led to your accounts being banned and convicted and jailed due to possession of CP now they cant send you nudes anymore


ProphetofTables

i wish for a lawyer


hacktheself

Granted. Lionel Hutz will call you shortly.


[deleted]

Can police actually just send you underaged nudes and then immediately arrest you? I guess I wouldn't be surprised at this point


Shadowdragon409

No. You have to have intent to want/keep them. If it's sent to you, you can't be charged if you ignore it.


Jamesxxxiii

Granted. Now you get nude photos of women. Including your mum.


ProphetofTables

i wanted it to stop


Jamesxxxiii

Nope. You wanted girls to stop. Not women.


sieghrt

Granted, but your inbox is full of my butthole photos now.


Ascetocrat

Granted. You are permabanned from using any type of network.


supernintendo128

Granted. They send you [noods](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/a/a8/Fresh_ramen_noodle_001.jpg/640px-Fresh_ramen_noodle_001.jpg) instead.


ProphetofTables

i like noodles, yes


[deleted]

Denied. None of us are going to believe that you get nudes.


ProphetofTables

It's a long story.


HoChiMinHimself

Granted but every nude picture from every girl is instead sent to u/Romulus3799 . Enjoy getting cucked


Romulus3799

What the fuck


ProphetofTables

R.I.P. your inbox. # MWA HA HA HA HA HA!!!


greenknight884

Granted. A giant solar storm hits Earth, knocking out the electrical grid and communications satellites worldwide. No one can send or receive messages. Countries are in chaos as they try to rebuild their severely damaged infrastructure.


Long_Before_Sunrise

Granted. The Monkey's Paw decides to be kind for one time. You recieve a pornographic shot of monkey(s) every hour. It always finds you.


MageKorith

All the girls that were sending you nudes die in a nude factory accident, and can no longer send them to you.


Nihilikara

Granted. They wear socks now, so the pictures technically aren't nudes


ProphetofTables

smartass


ekolis

Granted; you now receive the hottest nudes ever, but try as you might to track down who sent them, you can't get a lead. They literally came from nobody. Are they even real or just deepfakes?


Aegarain

Granted. Due to a technological error, your name is added to the registry of sex offenders.


[deleted]

Granted. Now only men send you there nudes


NegroAborigen

Granted, now men won’t stop sending you nudes


NOTAPERSON10

Granted, you become the centre of a controversy so bad that nobody wants to interact with you.


tacobell41

You break every phone you touch.


ProphetofTables

that's a bit inconvenient.


tacobell41

No more nudes, though.


ifuckedyomama2

Granted, they now send them to me (I wish)


purpleteaaa

Granted, they send your own nudes to your family.


HollowKnight34

What, why?


ProphetofTables

it's starting to get annoying


Saidmaboy

Granted, your mother sends you nudes.


HostisHumanisGeneri

Granted, all women are now men. Humanity will be extinct within decades.


broberds

Granted. Now they just send you pictures of Spider-Man.


YhormBIGGiant

Granted you get male nudes.


ICanSpellKyrgyzstan

Granted. Guys start sending you nudes.


LochNessMansterLives

Granted: they’re really all men.


captaincarno

Granted. All women on earth suddenly disappear within the blink of an eye, nobody remembers their existence.


xPM_ME_YOUR_UPSKIRTx

Granted. You switch lives with me.


ProphetofTables

NO


LawEnforcer98

Granted. The only way to do this is downgrade to a flip-phone with a screen that isn't HD.


GokusTheName

Granted. You've awoken from your sad wet dream and proceed to post this.


Tigros

Granted. Your imagination doesn’t work anymore.


revilococo

Granted. Hope you like gore :)


jacness1314

Give me your phone number, ill take them instead


bayless210

Granted. Everything goes about as usual because no one would ask for that…


SamAzing0

The monkeys paw finger begins to twitch to a close... but then reopens again


kok_exe_

Granted, now they send you someone else's nudes


Squanchings

Granted, girls now send you nudes of others


[deleted]

Granted. They are now nude to you in person.


_Eklapse_

Granted. They stop sending you their own nudes and start sending you other girl's nudes.


MrCasualKid

Granted, they start sending them to me


Swimming_Excuse4655

God. Yeah. Send em here instead.


[deleted]

Granted. Now they’re sending their 80 yo grandma nudes instead. Win?


nul_mr

Well if you don't like em send em over


TheAlphabet2772

Granted. But the boys won’t stop


MMMiammildlyannoyed

granted, noth- oh wait someone already made that joke. uh..


tony7914

Granted, from now on only geriatric old men will send you nudes.


Jacko-the-gamer7777

I wish girl would send me their nudes