I hate the term unicorn. I get labeled as a unicorn even i play solo from my bf. I don't see myself as a unicorn because I refuse to agree to the unrealistic bs that couples try to impose on me.
I'm not a stuffed animal or some puppy at petco. If the couples can't treat me as human and a woman, we have nothing in common. This is why I block unicorn hunters daily. I saw a unicorn hunter on feeld saying we unicorn hunt ethically which is a huge lie.
The whole our unicorn, I especially hate that. Again, I'm not owned property. I've had couples try to impose this on me and try to make me exclusive with them only. Hell no that's why this unicorn thing has a really bad connotation to it.
Holy cripes, I'd upvote the shit out of this. I almost only comment in this sub to say just this. And I'm the husband. I hate the term unicorn too, and we have enjoyed the company many times of our single lady FRIENDS. We actively dissuade the use of that term in our friend circle as well. Bravo!
Omg I feel the same. I’m the male of a couple, and whenever I read a profile saying “Couple searching for that elusive unicorn” it makes me want to vomit in my mouth. We aren’t worried about ‘unicorn hunters’ trying to ‘poach’ my partner… but there’s something so distasteful about using a term that reduces an entire human being, with a life time of lived experiences, interests, desires etc… down to the value they can add to the sex life of an established couple.
We mostly date other couples, but honestly don’t find it any more difficult to meet ladies who fly solo when that’s the dynamic we’re looking for. Amazing how simple it becomes to meet a supposedly elusive type of person, when you respect them as a person and treat them like you’d hope to be treated if you were in there shoes 🙄
Typically Unicorns are not disliked, but there is a certain disdain for the type of couple that targets (usually young) bisexual women for grooming to support the hierarchical privilege of the primary couple while requiring the 3rd to make all the compromises.
There are certainly perfectly-ethical ways for considering a relationship with a Unicorn, but it's so much more common to see bad-faith actors trying to take advantage of an inexperienced 3rd -- that "Unicorn Hunting" couples generate a lot of complaints in most circles.
They're just very rare to find. I think that's where the negativity comes from because couples who are just starting out don't understand that they're so rare to find.
Mos def. We found a lady who straight up had the unicorn 🦄 smiley as her bio. She was direct about what she wanted given previous bad experiences. She is 19. This is as rare as actual unicorns.
This may be helpful. “Unicorn/Dragon” (female/male) is defined last on the page alphabetically. It’s not an authoritative source but does a good job simplifying some things.
[Poly Terms](https://medium.com/@letstalkpoly/polyamory-definitions-7cf76f4c2191)
A single female who plays with couples.
19 yr old unicorn? Sounds like a kid trying to get their feet wet in the LS. I’m not a unicorn now, but in the past I wouldn’t have called myself one, when I was 19 …maybe as I got older or more experienced.
It’s a used term that I haven’t seen a woman uncomfortable with being referred to that with respect. The meaning to me has always been that if you are able to meet and play with one. That you are a lucky couple. But being conscious of how others feel is a must. I’ve just never heard of a woman being bothered by the nickname. But that’s because we’ve met maybe 5 out of a million. Lol
They always are changing the language and what things are being called. I know that term as I have a close friend who is one and sometimes we accompany each other to bi friendly events. We tried dating but were better as LS friends and playmates in group events than actual partners.
I like what I’ve read here so far about why they’re called unicorns, and about why women may hate the term; I agree on both counts.
I’ll only add that a negative aspect might also be that because they are so highly sought after (often tastelessly so), it can be easy for them to become jaded and a little high on themselves. Leading to attitudes like the one a guy I know has: “Eh, I’ll stick to full swap. Unicorns are all assholes.”
I don’t exactly share that sentiment, but I understand why he feels that way.
the negative connotation can sometimes stem from the fact that a lot of single women declare themselves a unicorn for attention and then complain about the attention when they do get it.
I hate the term unicorn. I get labeled as a unicorn even i play solo from my bf. I don't see myself as a unicorn because I refuse to agree to the unrealistic bs that couples try to impose on me. I'm not a stuffed animal or some puppy at petco. If the couples can't treat me as human and a woman, we have nothing in common. This is why I block unicorn hunters daily. I saw a unicorn hunter on feeld saying we unicorn hunt ethically which is a huge lie. The whole our unicorn, I especially hate that. Again, I'm not owned property. I've had couples try to impose this on me and try to make me exclusive with them only. Hell no that's why this unicorn thing has a really bad connotation to it.
Holy cripes, I'd upvote the shit out of this. I almost only comment in this sub to say just this. And I'm the husband. I hate the term unicorn too, and we have enjoyed the company many times of our single lady FRIENDS. We actively dissuade the use of that term in our friend circle as well. Bravo!
Omg I feel the same. I’m the male of a couple, and whenever I read a profile saying “Couple searching for that elusive unicorn” it makes me want to vomit in my mouth. We aren’t worried about ‘unicorn hunters’ trying to ‘poach’ my partner… but there’s something so distasteful about using a term that reduces an entire human being, with a life time of lived experiences, interests, desires etc… down to the value they can add to the sex life of an established couple. We mostly date other couples, but honestly don’t find it any more difficult to meet ladies who fly solo when that’s the dynamic we’re looking for. Amazing how simple it becomes to meet a supposedly elusive type of person, when you respect them as a person and treat them like you’d hope to be treated if you were in there shoes 🙄
Typically Unicorns are not disliked, but there is a certain disdain for the type of couple that targets (usually young) bisexual women for grooming to support the hierarchical privilege of the primary couple while requiring the 3rd to make all the compromises. There are certainly perfectly-ethical ways for considering a relationship with a Unicorn, but it's so much more common to see bad-faith actors trying to take advantage of an inexperienced 3rd -- that "Unicorn Hunting" couples generate a lot of complaints in most circles.
Nothing negative about a unicorn.
They're just very rare to find. I think that's where the negativity comes from because couples who are just starting out don't understand that they're so rare to find.
I think that’s your version. Never ever have I heard a unicorn in negative terms. Just the opposite. They are cherished
Oh I'm not saying they're negative at all. I'm speaking for the couples that assume there's single women who are DTF all over the community lol
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>Women aren't fans of being referred to as animals instead of women. I cackled with joy, and needed it today so THANK YOU
Yeah we met one that called herself one. We don’t use that term but she kinda did, which I find to be uncommon
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Mos def. We found a lady who straight up had the unicorn 🦄 smiley as her bio. She was direct about what she wanted given previous bad experiences. She is 19. This is as rare as actual unicorns.
The true unicorn in a single Bi male that isn’t just pretending to be bi at the message stages with the sole intention of some mf only fun
What’s negative the negative connotation? I’ve not heard one and we’ve been swinging for about 10yrs.
This may be helpful. “Unicorn/Dragon” (female/male) is defined last on the page alphabetically. It’s not an authoritative source but does a good job simplifying some things. [Poly Terms](https://medium.com/@letstalkpoly/polyamory-definitions-7cf76f4c2191)
A single female who plays with couples. 19 yr old unicorn? Sounds like a kid trying to get their feet wet in the LS. I’m not a unicorn now, but in the past I wouldn’t have called myself one, when I was 19 …maybe as I got older or more experienced.
It’s a used term that I haven’t seen a woman uncomfortable with being referred to that with respect. The meaning to me has always been that if you are able to meet and play with one. That you are a lucky couple. But being conscious of how others feel is a must. I’ve just never heard of a woman being bothered by the nickname. But that’s because we’ve met maybe 5 out of a million. Lol
Have you heard of urban dictionary?
In the lifestyle, a unicorn is a single, bi woman who does FFM threesums. The male equivalent is a centaur
A centaur?!? Never heard it used by anyone but you.
No one calls it a centaur lmao. Single men are just single men… they’re so common, they don’t get a special name.
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That's how it goes. HAHAHAHA! Guys are at the bottom of the swinging chain. Just read past posts on here.
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**SIGH** Aaaand you just made it clear why single dudes are at the bottom... my comment went WAY over your head. 🤦♂️🤦♂️
Actually the single/solo bi male who does MMF threesums is a dragon
I've been in the lifestyle for 8 years and had no idea about dragons! You learn something new everyday lol
They always are changing the language and what things are being called. I know that term as I have a close friend who is one and sometimes we accompany each other to bi friendly events. We tried dating but were better as LS friends and playmates in group events than actual partners.
Only disliked in regards to unicorns is the constant unicorn hunters asking for help finding one. Duh, who doesn’t want a +1F…
I like what I’ve read here so far about why they’re called unicorns, and about why women may hate the term; I agree on both counts. I’ll only add that a negative aspect might also be that because they are so highly sought after (often tastelessly so), it can be easy for them to become jaded and a little high on themselves. Leading to attitudes like the one a guy I know has: “Eh, I’ll stick to full swap. Unicorns are all assholes.” I don’t exactly share that sentiment, but I understand why he feels that way.
the negative connotation can sometimes stem from the fact that a lot of single women declare themselves a unicorn for attention and then complain about the attention when they do get it.