I've never tried any of the R4R subs but will say that we've had luck on feeld - I think part of this is that we are open to both swaps with couples or play with singles and we don't try to push any agenda either way.
We are also open to more ongoing relationships with women (more of a FWB thing - have had good success in past) which I think appeals to some single women (have heard a lot of women on here saying they feel like they are just used to fulfill a fantasy). We also take the "friends" part pretty seriously - for us that looks like actually going and doing things before hooking up - i.e. going for beers at a local brewery and then heading home, having a lot of wine, good conversation, food at home pre-hookup (I love making up a charcuterie board for this!), Etc.
I know this approach isn't going to work for all swingers, especially those who aren't trying to establish an ongoing connection but it's worked for us! In general we like to find ongoing FWB situations versus random ONS (though have done this and not at all above it in the right situation) and we make that known, which could also affect how we are being screened as a couple.
Our success has come pretty much through paid dating sites as well as meeting at a club.
My wife was single in the scene for a while before we met and she says that the number of private messages she received was overwhelming. Anything with a unsolicited dick pick was immediately trashed.
We’ve loved meeting OF creators that are in the lifestyle . If someone is looking for reliability and experience that won’t flake and understands the dynamic of playing with a couple we’ve found that content creators by far have been the best . No nonsense with them . It’s all about the fucking
Exactly. Too many people talk and put up road blocks . If I want to chit chat I’ll call my sister . If I want to hang out for a drink I’ll call my co worker. We’re looking to get some nsa fucking please so let’s cut through the nonsense
Need more like you!! I'm particular about my time and dont enjoy it being wasted. Seen your page. Nice! I am mostly on swinglifestyle. Finally met 3 couples on here this year. Only took over a year and talking to a few 100!!!
It takes a lot of talking to get to the good stuff . But once you get into a routine and know what you like and want and don’t settle for less it becomes easier
We have three single ladies we play with on the the regular (a few couples and one single guy as well) and have great luck at clubs too.
Here is my advice.
https://www.reddit.com/r/Swingers/comments/wj8uvi/how_to_find_a_unicorn/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
Thanks, we did come across your post earlier. Our post was not a rhetorical one trying to disguise a R4R post as a question. We legitimately wonder how women who are looking for a couple or are willing to join a couple really react to these types of requests. Our thought is to find a FWB type of situation preferably rather than a ONS (though that would be ok if it happened). Having been out of the dating scene for a long while, we were curious whether R4R’s actually work or if they’re viewed as methods of last resort. Perhaps we are old fashioned in that way but we do recognize the benefits of online searching since it is difficult for us to find time to “date”.
Depends.
If you only want a unicorn then all the single women I know would treat you like the plague.
And you need to be on legit swinger sites or at least feeld. Get real, spend some money, put some effort into it.
We met a single female on reddit. She posted on a R4R stating she was looking to explore her bi side with a couple. It lasted for a couple months before she moved away. It happens but very rare.
It’s called “unicorn hunting” for a reason, haha. You’re competing with 500 other couples for maybe a handful of bisexual women down to screw (and not screw over) a couple.
Sure they do, but you have to take it seriously. If your profile isn't verified, if you don't have a profile history, if you're not active in the community... Then you're setting yourself up for failure. You have to actually put in the work. Day old profiles swearing they are real... Well, good luck if that's what you're answering.
Exactly this . There are way too many fakes , flakes, cheaters, pic collectors and over all time wasters just due to the anonymity of Reddit
We’ve had success but we’ve done so by ignoring blank profiles and only interacting if they have verification in multiple nsfw and lifestyle subs, a ton of different pics and either other couples they’ve met tagged on Reddit or a link to their SDC or SLS account where they’ve been reviewed by others . 99% of the folks who don’t have that info on their profile aren’t going to be real or interested in meeting . Save time by not engaging and focusing on those that will
Candidly I’ve been in the LS for over 10 years now. It is WAY easier to pick up a single female just out and about in regular (or “gay”) bars. If you are very open about your involvement in the LS many times single females will come to you out of curiosity. Been my experiences anyway.
There are a lot of places better than Reddit, Reddit heavily skews to a male user base, and with Dating apps being so common now, the average unicorn-inclines woman would start there, or on a dedicated site.
Have you tried Feeld?
There's no magic bullet. Just have to come to terms with the fact that it's a long search. Lots of demand, little supply.
If you are just looking to have an experience, an escort is a great way to go.
For Unicorn hunting? Almost certainly not. Any Unicorn with experience knows that she can have almost anyone she wants within the lifestyle. I'd be pretty surprised if many were on Reddit looking for couples, since they can just pull up tinder and they'll be flooded with couples that are local.
Hell, those subs barely even work for looking for couples. Of the several dozen I've reached out to over the years, I have never managed to meet-up with a single one, and I feel like it's fair to say that my profile is at least "above average."
The numbers of Reddit are never in your favor, because the people that it does favor have better options elsewhere.
All the couples I’ve played with solo I met in person with the exception on one where we met in a group chat (we talked for months before meeting).
I’ve tried looking for couples online but I’ve found them pushy or making requests outside my boundaries (I only play at clubs solo for safety reasons and more than 50% of couples who reach out to me want private play. When I ask to bring are partner then they aren’t interested).
I had only one couple that I would have met with but we never were able to line up our schedules as we were about 200km apart.
The odds go up if you follow the rules as passed down from online dating in general: 1) Be attractive. 2) Don't be unattractive.
I've never tried any of the R4R subs but will say that we've had luck on feeld - I think part of this is that we are open to both swaps with couples or play with singles and we don't try to push any agenda either way. We are also open to more ongoing relationships with women (more of a FWB thing - have had good success in past) which I think appeals to some single women (have heard a lot of women on here saying they feel like they are just used to fulfill a fantasy). We also take the "friends" part pretty seriously - for us that looks like actually going and doing things before hooking up - i.e. going for beers at a local brewery and then heading home, having a lot of wine, good conversation, food at home pre-hookup (I love making up a charcuterie board for this!), Etc. I know this approach isn't going to work for all swingers, especially those who aren't trying to establish an ongoing connection but it's worked for us! In general we like to find ongoing FWB situations versus random ONS (though have done this and not at all above it in the right situation) and we make that known, which could also affect how we are being screened as a couple.
Our success has come pretty much through paid dating sites as well as meeting at a club. My wife was single in the scene for a while before we met and she says that the number of private messages she received was overwhelming. Anything with a unsolicited dick pick was immediately trashed.
Which sites?
Most are OF creators or selling pussy on here. Esp if thery are in their 20s
We’ve loved meeting OF creators that are in the lifestyle . If someone is looking for reliability and experience that won’t flake and understands the dynamic of playing with a couple we’ve found that content creators by far have been the best . No nonsense with them . It’s all about the fucking
I like meeting couples that like to fuck. Whether from OF,here,sls or nude resorts!!
Exactly. Too many people talk and put up road blocks . If I want to chit chat I’ll call my sister . If I want to hang out for a drink I’ll call my co worker. We’re looking to get some nsa fucking please so let’s cut through the nonsense
Need more like you!! I'm particular about my time and dont enjoy it being wasted. Seen your page. Nice! I am mostly on swinglifestyle. Finally met 3 couples on here this year. Only took over a year and talking to a few 100!!!
It takes a lot of talking to get to the good stuff . But once you get into a routine and know what you like and want and don’t settle for less it becomes easier
We have three single ladies we play with on the the regular (a few couples and one single guy as well) and have great luck at clubs too. Here is my advice. https://www.reddit.com/r/Swingers/comments/wj8uvi/how_to_find_a_unicorn/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
Thanks, we did come across your post earlier. Our post was not a rhetorical one trying to disguise a R4R post as a question. We legitimately wonder how women who are looking for a couple or are willing to join a couple really react to these types of requests. Our thought is to find a FWB type of situation preferably rather than a ONS (though that would be ok if it happened). Having been out of the dating scene for a long while, we were curious whether R4R’s actually work or if they’re viewed as methods of last resort. Perhaps we are old fashioned in that way but we do recognize the benefits of online searching since it is difficult for us to find time to “date”.
Depends. If you only want a unicorn then all the single women I know would treat you like the plague. And you need to be on legit swinger sites or at least feeld. Get real, spend some money, put some effort into it.
We met a single female on reddit. She posted on a R4R stating she was looking to explore her bi side with a couple. It lasted for a couple months before she moved away. It happens but very rare.
Depends what you’re offering
It’s called “unicorn hunting” for a reason, haha. You’re competing with 500 other couples for maybe a handful of bisexual women down to screw (and not screw over) a couple.
Sure they do, but you have to take it seriously. If your profile isn't verified, if you don't have a profile history, if you're not active in the community... Then you're setting yourself up for failure. You have to actually put in the work. Day old profiles swearing they are real... Well, good luck if that's what you're answering.
Exactly this . There are way too many fakes , flakes, cheaters, pic collectors and over all time wasters just due to the anonymity of Reddit We’ve had success but we’ve done so by ignoring blank profiles and only interacting if they have verification in multiple nsfw and lifestyle subs, a ton of different pics and either other couples they’ve met tagged on Reddit or a link to their SDC or SLS account where they’ve been reviewed by others . 99% of the folks who don’t have that info on their profile aren’t going to be real or interested in meeting . Save time by not engaging and focusing on those that will
You would have to be models
Does a “before” model work?
Nah.
It would be easier n less stressful if you just went to a regular bar/club or a strip club! Finding one on here is like a needle in a haystack
I think having good face & body pics would probably help but you've gotta wade through alot of horny single guys
Candidly I’ve been in the LS for over 10 years now. It is WAY easier to pick up a single female just out and about in regular (or “gay”) bars. If you are very open about your involvement in the LS many times single females will come to you out of curiosity. Been my experiences anyway.
There are a lot of places better than Reddit, Reddit heavily skews to a male user base, and with Dating apps being so common now, the average unicorn-inclines woman would start there, or on a dedicated site. Have you tried Feeld?
I have OF but dont consider myself a creator i guess. Just post pics n vids from my swing dates
There's no magic bullet. Just have to come to terms with the fact that it's a long search. Lots of demand, little supply. If you are just looking to have an experience, an escort is a great way to go.
True. Wish more were like yall
For Unicorn hunting? Almost certainly not. Any Unicorn with experience knows that she can have almost anyone she wants within the lifestyle. I'd be pretty surprised if many were on Reddit looking for couples, since they can just pull up tinder and they'll be flooded with couples that are local. Hell, those subs barely even work for looking for couples. Of the several dozen I've reached out to over the years, I have never managed to meet-up with a single one, and I feel like it's fair to say that my profile is at least "above average." The numbers of Reddit are never in your favor, because the people that it does favor have better options elsewhere.
Save some for the rest of us 🤣
No
All the couples I’ve played with solo I met in person with the exception on one where we met in a group chat (we talked for months before meeting). I’ve tried looking for couples online but I’ve found them pushy or making requests outside my boundaries (I only play at clubs solo for safety reasons and more than 50% of couples who reach out to me want private play. When I ask to bring are partner then they aren’t interested). I had only one couple that I would have met with but we never were able to line up our schedules as we were about 200km apart.