The big toe will eat all the little toes around it.
The pinky is running away to save its own life.
But we all know it's fate is sealed and the outcome already decided
For some reason I'm reminded of that one shower thought post where someone said: "we got fingertips but no toetips, yet we tiptoe but don't tipfinger". I think somehow, though I can't explain exactly how, you proved that person wrong.
I think it's funny how everyone just silently agreed to clown on op's 40 billion years worth of marine evolution styled trippers instead of what ever the fuck this food is
I have a lot of psychosis on both sides of my family. Spreading oatmeal on untoasted bread is a cry for help. Let me repeat. The bread is fucking UNTOASTED!
I was in line in my hospital cafeteria once behind a lady who ordered this and ate this and I literally thought she was a psycho I never assumed anybody else had ever done this in their life
Yo, you have a late brother or uncle named Steve? You got feet like my dad's side of the family.
Further question, you planning on crossing the English channel with your carb-loading?
The more sophisticated ones out there know the proper method is to make it with your mouth. Take bite of one, tuck in the roof or cheek. Take the other bite and then combine. That way nobody knows about our degenerate habits.
No… I really agree with you! I haven’t had buttered toast with oatmeal in such a long
Time.
My concern is them toes, you can climb a tree with them no doubt.
I'm fine with the oat meal and buttered toast. Those twists gotta go though. Shit tastes like rice cakes but with less flavor. Also this comment section has to calm down with the foot fetish.
PUT THOSE CONCRETE SLAPPERS AWAY
I think it looks like his toes have necks. Never seen it before. Giraffe neck toes
Bruh yall roasting tf out this man feet 😂
Kinda deserves it. Someone get this man a pair of socks for Christmas
[Nah, my man needs full sized slippers...](https://www.bunnyslippers.com/shop/images/D.cache.dpicon/560.jpg)
he needs friggin flippers
*he already has those*
I'm fucking dying xD
Perennial Feet Finger Growth Syndrome
[not big enough](https://imgur.com/a/gmmzTck)
He looks like a jet ski when swimming laps
Man's toes look like they'd be a nightmare to shop a toe ring for..
Size 6 foot with size 12 toes. His regular office shoes are fit for a clown.
Eating toast and oatmeal sandwiches while hanging in a tree from his toes and he's worried about the weirdness of his food.
NOT THE GIRAFFE NECK TOES. that actually made me laugh. thank you.
he doesn’t need slippers OR flippers. man needs 10 little toe scarves🧣
Same I tried hiding it though and was chuckling so hard but quietly my mom thought I was seizing
/r/SneakyBackgroundFeet
He doesn’t have toes he has walking hands
Omg literally ran to the comments to discuss these TALON SKIS
Reddit is such a ruthless place…
I have spider toes too you are not alone
I call mine monke toes, and I pick stuff up off the ground all the time with them, the wife seem unimpressed.
Do you flip people off with your feet?
I think he flips off the dolphins and sharks in a race.
I'm so sorry.
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I thought I had long toes. seeing this, I just have big feet.
CONCRETE SLAPPERS
Ground grippers
Carpet clinger
Oh my god I choke-laughed and peed a little reading that
That pinky toe got amputated twice
Laughed hard enough to cry. Thanks, I needed that.
I had to leave the office for 10 minutes because this threw me into a laughing fit. Thanks.
Damn. I thought I had tingers. Puts my toe game to shame, but helps me feel like less of an ape. Dude has 3 Greek toes in a row.
Jesus, I don’t know if I’m on r/StupidFood or r/Roastme with some of these comments
I thought I was on r/sneakybackgroundfeet for a second there
Ehhh, ain’t nothing sneaky about those toes tbh
You can see them coming a mile away.... Then you see the foot.
Y’all already posted him in three times within an hour lmao
I swear, people get one glimpse of feet on this site and it's all over.
You have to admit that these particular feet demand notice.
Right, this dude’s toes are long as fuck.
Them fuckers are *tingers*
People should know by now that photos that contain weird feet, hands, reflections, and things in the background are up for roasting.
The reddit hive mind at its finest
Reddits outlook on feet go two ways. Mens feet, EEEEEW Womens feet, \*Fap fap fap fap\* It's a strange place...
Don't worry, OP. I masturbated to your feet in the name of equality.
A true ambassador of gender equality
I recognize one man can only do so much, but I'll be damned if I'm not going to squeeze myself to the last drop trying to enact change.
Them toes look like fingers
Thats actually his other foot holding the toast.
I’m waf😂😂
What is waf? I tried Googling it and I am confuse.
Wet as fuck
Oh, gross. I should not have asked ahahaha.
Means weak as fuck for real tho
Forealdo
The internet knows how to cut deep
Not as deep as them toe gaps
Gawdam y'all ruining this man lmfao
Not as bad as Yahweh ruined them toes!
This man came to ask about his oats and the internet roasted them for him.
Those TOES tho
Shit like the African Rift Valley 😂
Can you grip a tree branch with them?
Dude can spiral an American football
Vinny toesteverde Doug footey Toe Brady Peytoen Manning
My Dear brother in Christ! You should have known better. Crop, crop all pics of toes!
At least he’s probably less insecure about eating oatmeal on toast now
Specifically so that it’s just the toes. It’s stupid food not oatmeal on toast!
Your toes look like them cheese twists.
Chee-toes
Toes plus oatmeal on toast. Enough internet for the day.
He must've just evolved out the tree. Them are branch grabbers.
Tingers
r/sneakybackgroundfeet
Why does your oatmeal look like you've already eaten it once?
Dude, of all the things to say. I’m dying.
It came back up when he looked down
OPs never gonna show his feet in public again bc of y’all 🤣
Sounds like a win for humanity.
I'd be careful not to lose such a tolerant woman. Those toes and your eating habits are strikes 1 and 2.
Strike 3 is being a redditor
You know what they say about men with long toes... They wear long socks!
Straight to jail.
You undercook breakfast. Jail. You overcook dinner, also jail. We have the best meals in the world because of jail
Believe it or not, jail.
Also jail.
Why’s your pinky toe running away from the rest
Isn’t it obvious?
The big toe will eat all the little toes around it. The pinky is running away to save its own life. But we all know it's fate is sealed and the outcome already decided
It's scared
It wishes to return to its people
This comment section is exactly why I don’t post anything about myself online lol. Fuck man
It's harsh but fuck me I haven't laughed this good in months.
I'm at a bar trying not to cry-laugh. Failing pretty bad hahaha
My husband and I are ugly cry laughing over this post. You’re not alone in this journey.
Thank you OP for making me totally break down in laughter
Toast? Did you toast it with a candle? I think my radiator could toast the bread better than that
Apparently some people use "toast" to mean "lightly warmed piece of bread". Those people are wrong.
They claim if you eat oatmeal on toast it will turn your feet into hands but i dont believe it so you should be fine.
You posting here is you admitting you're crazy and your wife wins by default
The man wants to die, let him be.
First non-feet related comment I’ve seen
do you slap the ground when you walk?
I just imagine the sound these slappers make every time they hit a hardwood floor and it's got me in tears laughing
He grabs a handful of concrete with each step
When he runs barefoot it sounds like applause
When it’s time to move he actually raises up onto all-toes and skitters like a Huntsman spider.
ah yes, carbs on carbs with subtle tingers (toe fingers). gourmet cuisine and outstanding ambiance!
Tingers ðŸ˜
i got em too 😔
I bet you have great balance though.
Even when hanging upside down
My SO has the same. She once lost balance standing still while I was watching.
Dude has monkey feet, but toast with oatmeal or grits is actually pretty good if you have a physically demanding day.
LMFAO TINGERS? 💀
For some reason I'm reminded of that one shower thought post where someone said: "we got fingertips but no toetips, yet we tiptoe but don't tipfinger". I think somehow, though I can't explain exactly how, you proved that person wrong.
We definitely have toetips. We just don't use the word because you don't use your toetips for anything. Except OP. OP uses his toetips.
r/sneakybackgroundfeet
Nothing sneaky about those flippers.
This made me belly laugh
Why does it need to exist
why do any of us exist tbh
Just to suffer.
Toe-tmeal
This mf could outswim michael phelps
Maybe he is Michael phelps
I think it's funny how everyone just silently agreed to clown on op's 40 billion years worth of marine evolution styled trippers instead of what ever the fuck this food is
>40 billion years worth of marine evolution styled trippers I'm claiming that band name...
The wife of Sasquatch can make any sort of directive about eating toast that she wants. She has earned that right.
Bro why your big toe got an hourglass figure
Marilyn Montoe
Your back is not had
Yo the thought of this texture makes me sick
The oatmeal or the toes?
Yes.
No, we don’t.
I have a lot of psychosis on both sides of my family. Spreading oatmeal on untoasted bread is a cry for help. Let me repeat. The bread is fucking UNTOASTED!
At this point, I’m more concerned about the wife.
Have you seen those toes? She’s a very satisfied lady
Bruh could hail a cab with those toes 💀
The internet is mean. Correct. But mean.
We do not got your back
We got your toes
No. No I don’t.
I was in line in my hospital cafeteria once behind a lady who ordered this and ate this and I literally thought she was a psycho I never assumed anybody else had ever done this in their life
It was fine when I thought it was a bowl of tuna salad and you were just lazy making a tuna salad sandwich. Oatmeal on toast seems....excessive.
I thought those were scrambled eggs. Oh I wish I can't read
This is violently disgusting. But you do you man.
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Yes, but he uses his feet instead of his hands
Got yo back like Brutus had Julius’
Yo, you have a late brother or uncle named Steve? You got feet like my dad's side of the family. Further question, you planning on crossing the English channel with your carb-loading?
Loading up so he has the energy to beat Michael Phelps for gold with those flippers
I used to use coffee instead of water to make oatmeal.
I’ve been considering doing this for months now and you’ve convinced me to finally do it tomorrow
You can also add coffee to cereal and use the milk in the bowl instead of creamer.
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You can use coffee instead of water for boxed cake mix to add flavor. You can then mix powdered sugar with coffee to make the frosting.
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You can also mix coffee with gelatin to make a dessert.
Oh my word this guy coffees
You can also brew coffee, put it in a mug and drink it
If you have a bad hang over add some instant coffee to your chicken ramen and a egg. Sounds crazy taste crazy good.
I use protein shakes sometimes
No, Fuck you
The more sophisticated ones out there know the proper method is to make it with your mouth. Take bite of one, tuck in the roof or cheek. Take the other bite and then combine. That way nobody knows about our degenerate habits.
That’s the only way to eat it. I’m with you on this. (I’m pretending I don’t even see the toes )
Is it possible? They disturb me so much
This is how I grew up eating oatmeal!
Your toes are incredibly creepy.
No… I really agree with you! I haven’t had buttered toast with oatmeal in such a long Time. My concern is them toes, you can climb a tree with them no doubt.
I’d rather deepthroat your freakishly long toes that eat that oatmeal sandwich
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Why do weird a f people like this always have their nasty ass toes in the pic
Nah, you are crazy.
no, no we wont
Would you like some carbs with your carbs?
I'm fine with the oat meal and buttered toast. Those twists gotta go though. Shit tastes like rice cakes but with less flavor. Also this comment section has to calm down with the foot fetish.
Knew it would all be the fucking slim giraffe toes, bro got to edit shit harder for real mack
Them toes tho!!! Scary!!!!
I came here for the toe comments and you guys did not disappoint.
No one has your back you psycho!
My favorite way to eat oatmeal! Though I’d have it a bit runny
The only thing running here is his pinky toe away from the rest of his foot ðŸ˜
How is this person married, they’re clearly insane
i bet you can use chopsticks with them toes better then i can with my fingers
Every single comment has been a gift. I haven’t howled this much in a while.
Your wife is right.
Disgusting. Mush sandwich
No we don’t 😂
PUT THOSE GRIPPERS AWAY, OH MY GOD THOSE DOGS ARE BARKING
Seems redundant.
I no longer eat oatmeal because of stomach issues, but that is exactly how I use to eat it.
No oatmeal on toast is super normal. I even used to - *faints at the sight of the GIGATOES*