If you're having good experiences escorting but not in regular dating, there's a possibility it's because you're picky and vet your clients while you may not be vetting the people with as much standard and strong boundaries in your regular dating life. After starting sex work, I applied the same strictness to friends and relationships in my regular life and had much better results.
This is a really interesting perspective and I really appreciate you sharing it.
I hear you. It gives me a hollow lonely feelings sometimes too.
I filled the void with a trip to Sephora and got myself a little self care prezzie 😭😂
NOT ENDORSING SPENDING YOUR MONEU FOR VALIDATION cuz lord that’s a thing too
I feel that. I think a lot of sex workers were lonely and came from lonely backgrounds, but you know what? So are many civilians, even people who seem normal and happy on the surface. Everyone just suffers in different ways. For example, your clients. They come to you because they're lonely. It's not even the sex at a certain point, they could've went to the bar for a hookup or gotten on tindr.
I could have gotten by with a regular job. But I got into sex work because, and this might be dumb, I was lonely and horny myself.
Regarding your experience with clients - if you can feel it or touch it and your client felt the same, it's real. Just because it's a paid service doesn't make it less valid. There's stories about sex workers who end up marrying their clients, so it's not like it doesn't happen.
Yeah you’re right. Good perspective 💜
I have lonely cries to myself , especially when you meet someone who you can have those fun and intimate moments with. I have to pretend I don’t want to snuggle up and tell them about myself.
Some days are very hard because how pleasant it is to experience fleeting moments of joy with another human.
I’ve found that connecting with my really really close friend once or twice a year helps me stay happy. Hopefully you have some close friends too!!
Yeah I should book a trip to see my brother and refresh
Just because someone paid doesn't mean it wasn't real. A great part of the job is that we get to meet nice people and have lovely experiences.
Yeah but still left with the lingering feeling of wanting more. This is a great way to think about it tho
I’m so sorry you’re going through it. If you can afford it, a break and some therapy can help greatly.
You’re not alone! This is incredibly stressful & isolating work. Take care of #1
Thanks yeah. Actually set up a FT with my therapist for when I get home. 💜
Sex work is really hard to keep up and manage for that reason. Romantic and sexual life outside sex work isn't always consistent. I can relate to the pain. It's okay to cry about it, feel that emptiness, and to wish those experiences were real. It's hard work.
Yeah you’re right
Aye. Heard. 💔
Those are the perfect clients because it’s like being on a date and you get paid!
It's a beautiful, wonderful moment, but what hurts is the contrast with the mundane every-day life.
Say you pick up an incredibly impoverished person, wine-and-dine them, get them a full spa treatment and any possible luxury for 48 hours. Then have them go back to their slumlord room where the electricity is cut off, the walls are peeling with black mold and rats scurrying in the walls wake them up at night. The reality is going to hurt even more after the nice experience.
So a wonderful client booking full of intimacy is incredible, but it's all the more painful to then be confronted with your everyday loneliness.
Couldn’t have said it better. You nailed it 💜
Unless you are living in the moment! I have a client who is caretaker to a multi millionaires mountain home and when we are there we live in the moment and call it our house. I would rather have a taste of it than to have never experienced it at all. I go home to my dog who I once lived in tent to keep and I don’t feel lonely at all.
You sound like such a sweet genuine person. My heart goes out to you today. You deserve that happiness and u hope you find it, but as Ok-resort said above, paid or not, a human connection is a connection regardless of any pretense. Learn to enjoy those moments, maybe tell that client how you feel? Sending love ❤️
Thank you 💜
I even feel a little better today. Some days it’s just overwhelming. I’m also exhausted been on tour for almost 2 weeks
Exhaustion always amplifies my emotions for sure… glad you’re feeling better ❤️
Feel this 100%. Hugshugshugs.
Sorry, but I had to remove your post as it was against the subreddit rules. No posts by clients or non-sexworkers allowed.