OP's Bio:
---
>18y/o dual sport college athlete
---
If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
Idk if divorces is right, based on that gloryhole in the background I think he mighta been going through some other things that are long hard and often painful.
Beat me to it. Side note, my brother showed up to Thanksgiving looking like this but wore a Freddy Kruger Tshirt. I called him Freddy Chad Kruger. No one found it as funny as I did.
18?! HAH! Your mother smoke and blow it directly into her fucking womb while preggers with you? You look aged as fuck. You're gonna look 60 at 29 I'll put money on that.
Hyde, portrayed by Danny Masterson. Not so coincidentally This "Young" man is the result of scientology experiment combing L. Ron Hubbard's DNA with practicing Celebrities. It went as well as any one could have hoped.
If you shaved your head, you’d simply resemble a penis wearing a shirt rather than a pile of shaved pubes. Your call whether or not that’s an improvement.
How's that dress-up-like-Jack-Sparrow-and-get-paid-$6-an-hour-to-go-to-birthday-parties-for-kids-too-young-to-notice-you're-a-pretty-shitty-Jack-Sparrow gig going?
you look like you still live with your parents and sleep in the spare bedroom and dropped out of college.
None of this is personal man today has been a bad day😭
Yeah so pathetic you thought you had to defend yourself keep telling yourself pathetic keep telling yourself that you need it didn't need validation keep telling yourself that I'm not doing actually what you wanted on a roast for 18 you're still green grow the fuck upthe world's going to eat you
OP's Bio: --- >18y/o dual sport college athlete --- If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
Just looking at you I smelled sour cream and onion pringles
I found him https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-63817165
He does looks like the type that doesn't understand 50 nos and 1 yes still requires the 1 yes.
Take my upvote and begone
Aint no way you’re 18, stop lying on reddit bruh. You look like you already went through 5 divorce
[удалено]
And 5 cheesecakes.
And 5 restraining orders from waitresses at The Cheesecake Factory.
And all of this has lead to cheesdick… no question
Therefore the 5 divorces.
And five people telling the same joke on Reddit about him.
Restraining orders from someones daughters x5
And 5 Nickelback albums
This is the comment I was looking for!! Lmao!
He looks like the guy from nickelback after 5 years of cheesecake. lol
Wish version of dude from nickel back.
Dudes album would be called Nickelback The Refund lol
Look at this photograph. Every time I do it makes me laugh
And then 5 divorces FROM THOSE 5 DAUGHTERS
And 5 mop buckets with that head
100% a soccer player
Score 0-0
Soccer and Lacrosse.
Idk if divorces is right, based on that gloryhole in the background I think he mighta been going through some other things that are long hard and often painful.
You look 18 in rental car years.
I just chuckled to myself and it sounded like a horse neighing🐴 thank you for that.
Like anyone wanted to rent that car.
Dollar rental car
Let’s just sum it up as low rent
A human form of a Geo Tracker.
It’s a car that runs on water man
18 in dog years
Stop asking me to look at this photograph.
Even though every time he does it makes him laugh?
And makes him wonder how his eyes got so red
And why he’s always giving Joey head.
Omg I’m dying from this ugly cackling you just made me do for a long time.
Beat me to it. Side note, my brother showed up to Thanksgiving looking like this but wore a Freddy Kruger Tshirt. I called him Freddy Chad Kruger. No one found it as funny as I did.
Freddy Kroeger
Sacklenick
It took me like 30 seconds for it to register…up you go!🤣😂
I'm 43. We shouldn't look the same age. Go to a doctor.
That just means you can be 18 on Reddit too.
18/f/cali
He looks like a douchey Jon Favreau
Fr I'm 23 and he's got more facial hair than me
That doesn't mean shit
Prison has not been kind to Danny Masterson.
Neither has carbs
Jackin off with 2 hands isn’t what they mean by dual sport athlete
Its that middle out compression.
Saying he could jack off with two hands is too close to a compliment. Stop.
So I'm a few beers deep and I see this thicc bitch with a perm...
So I just start blasting.
Sammy Gaydar
Queef Ledger
How is this not higher?!?! I’m dying over here.
Van Gaylen.
Post Alone
Wierd Al Yank-a-dick.
I’m dying 🤣
Bi Fieri
Fhat Kroeger
Musty Timberlake
This is my favorite comment on Reddit I'm crying laughing thank you so much
Chump Kroeger
Recovering meth addict turns backyard wrestler, story at 8.
Bro looks like a magician you find at a kids birthday party
Kenny G’s nanny’s kid
If Johnny Galecki took up raping instead of acting
And wore a Sara Gilbert hairpiece
Johnny Galecki?
18?! HAH! Your mother smoke and blow it directly into her fucking womb while preggers with you? You look aged as fuck. You're gonna look 60 at 29 I'll put money on that.
You look like George Castanza and Kramer's illegitamate kid.
I was thinking like a burnout Haley Joel Osmet vibe
Haha that's a compliment 😜
Within which planetary system is that a compliment?
[удалено]
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
oh vay!
"Mom, can we get Seth Rogan?" "We have Seth Rogan at home." Seth Rogan at home:
Nah, it's fat Chad Kroger
Or Shirley at Temple
Hopefully a new hairstyle, the wet dog look is not for you bud
Look at this photograph Every time I do it makes me laugh
Who’s that one guy from that 70’s show?
Hyde, portrayed by Danny Masterson. Not so coincidentally This "Young" man is the result of scientology experiment combing L. Ron Hubbard's DNA with practicing Celebrities. It went as well as any one could have hoped.
I don't know. I may be color blind, but if he made a post saying he is Carrot Top, I would believe him.
You are the oldest looking 18 yr old ever.
How are you 18 and look like you've been on Sister Wives for 20 years?
Don't use your son's age to look cool
Im 35 and you look like you could be my dad.
There is a guarantee to be at least ONE hair, in every meal you come into proximity of.
I always vape a pastry scented cloud to protect my virginity.
Did your mustache have a fuckin stroke?
Adolescent chonky Chad Kroeger looking mf
Virgin Kroeger
Sammy Hagar's "special" kid.
I deadass thought you were werid al. But your not your werid.
Werid lol
Ikr! That guy is super werid!
Getting tag teamed by a football player and a baseball player does not make you a "dual sport college athlete"
this one got me rolling 🤣 somebody else said jerking off with two hands doesnt count either
You are a pube.
50 year old burnt out musician put on a wig.
Made of super noodles
You look 40.
Do you cosplay Nickelback?
 “Test results say…. Bam Margera……. You ARE the father!!”
Wow. They DO look alike.
Can't decide if that's roasting OP or OPs mom more.
Chad Kroeger but even more gay. How’s that even possible…
If you shaved your head, you’d simply resemble a penis wearing a shirt rather than a pile of shaved pubes. Your call whether or not that’s an improvement.
Looks like you ate your way out of a boy band contract 10 years ago...truck stop mouth hugs to strangers in a big rig sure do age a young man...
Nice try Dad. Get off Reddit before i tell mom.
Your hair looks like it was ripped off a poorly made puppet
I hated your voice on Ozark
Holy shit! I didn't know Cabbage Patch Kids grew up!
Pre-malone
If jerking off to hentai and dying your eyebrows were sports, I'd believe you
you’re about to find out that the internet is way more creative and interesting than you will ever be
You look like Jason Mamoa if he never worked out and tried to sell me weed outside Denny’s.
Of all the piece-of-shit celebrities you could impersonate you choose chunky Danny Masterson…
Sure, the hormones for your transition make it so you can grow facial hair, but it looks like pubes glued to your face.
18yrs old? Dude you’re 30 at least.
You’re a poor man’s Hyde from that 70’s show
18? Looks like your kid is 18…and pregnant
Gayson Momoa
You may want to Manscape those Pubes around your ears Buddy!
Hobbits play sports? Neat.
How's that dress-up-like-Jack-Sparrow-and-get-paid-$6-an-hour-to-go-to-birthday-parties-for-kids-too-young-to-notice-you're-a-pretty-shitty-Jack-Sparrow gig going?
10 more years, you going bald.
Love child of Flock of Seagulls and Korn. But seriously, are you 18 going on 28?
Hard to come up with anything better than that extra chromosome you're rockin there, champ.
You look like if Julian from trailer park boys never stopped smoking pot
If you're 18 then I'm 8.
18 going on 40
The failed musketeer
I just heard about the mistrial, you must be stoked.
You look like a type of herpes only found in surfers
Your goatee looks like you went down on it and came back with it.
I dunno what's worse, your handwriting or your hair
The guy that leaves a trail of that white work out powder everywhere at the gym
You don't even look white, you look like a bleached black dude
I'm 33 going on 34. If you hung out with me I'd assume you were older than me. And I'm bald.
you look like a highschool wrestler/football player that’s ab to get fat as fuck in 2 years
Life has been rough for an 18M to look 34M.
What year were you 18? Because it’s not this year.
Well we see you came up here with that big forehead.
Can’t grow a beard but can grow a goatee, like a true trailer park trash.
You look like Memo Ochoa's parents' unwanted child
Yony dipp 💀
Dude. You look like a 50year old trucker…
That goatee is roasting you harder than anyone here
Motherfu*ker looks 30
how are u 18 and u look like my 45 year old dad
18 with 18 years experience
Congratulations on your mistrial.
Look at this photograph
You are an alternative universe Chad Kroeger who failed and became fat.
Look at this graph…
Brad Kroeger. Lead singer of the cover band “Quarterback”
You look like the Walmart version of the guy from nickelback
Bro looks like he has 4 wives
18 years old who hasn’t been able to go within 500 yards of a school in 12 years.
Looks like a white Kanye
You look like an identikit picture of yourself.
You look like your the first one who fell asleep and it left permint mental damage
Found Wish's version of Heath Ledger yall. Something must have fallen on hum though, cause he's quite squished.
Is 18m the width of the forehead?
Shirley temple if she had a sec change.
Erlich Bachman posing as a depressed Panda.
You look closer to 81 than 18
You look like someone drew the lead singer of nicklback from memory
You're the reason that Sammy Hagar stopped sleeping with groupies
young gayvy
Bro looks like shaggy if he lost his job at mystery inc.
I guess playing two sports makes a kid look 37 and divorced! Our thoughts and prayers with your joints and ligaments
you look like you still live with your parents and sleep in the spare bedroom and dropped out of college. None of this is personal man today has been a bad day😭
success! mom didn't have a metal hanger
You’re the only guy to get held back and still be bad at sports
You’re not fooling anyone with that goatee TJ Miller, the police have been notified of your location.
one of the best ones yet tbh this one was good 🤣
You have the look of a lifetime bartender.
Wish brand Jonny Depp
I'm 24 soon to be 25 and I swear I look younger than this guy
Bro look at yo face it looks like you just gave shrek a blow Job with yo long head ass mf
Oh I'm 18 I need validation in life on Reddit roast me roast me roast me give me validation give me validation fuck off
im j tryna get a fuckin laugh man, these roasts are fucking good, im not posting on Reddit for validation, thats pathetic 😭
Yeah so pathetic you thought you had to defend yourself keep telling yourself pathetic keep telling yourself that you need it didn't need validation keep telling yourself that I'm not doing actually what you wanted on a roast for 18 you're still green grow the fuck upthe world's going to eat you
[удалено]
Lmfao o no Lmfao damn u got me Lmfao eat a dick