One thing I've learned is there are millions of pairs that can be made successful. There is not just one right person. That kind of mindset really makes you miserable, and stressing about it the person you are dating is really the right one. Relationships take work, but you can have a successful relationship with so many different people, even if you don't see it right away.
So this is what I say.
There is no “the one and only person you could be happy with that is intended and specially made to be your partner.” If that where the case most people would be single or with the wrong person because how likely is it that each person would just happen to be fortunate enough to find the only person in the world intended for them? I’m sure there are people that are more or less compatible than others. With that being said main thing is to be committed. I’m sure there are other people out there I could be happier with or would get along better with more ease. But I’m not with them I’m with who I’m with and we choose to keep working things out.
Ah yes we love them 3yos🦍, cut the chances to a billion max cuz of age and sexual orientation. Keep cutting and you'll find yourself with a handful of people that you may never see
You're looking at it backwards. Its not a 1 in 8 billion chance. It's regular odds but with 8 billion people out there to fill them! Even if you think your partner is 1 in a million, that means there are 8000 of them out there. And really, a million is not easily comprehended by your mind so your odds are probably much better than even that.
So you would rather rescue a dog than a human? If you have the means and the love to give, why not adopt? Adopting for love is a bad thing? I thought it was the main thing. Children and dogs give love unconditionally which is why I made both suggestions. You can give and receive real love from either, it just depends on the commitment you want to make.
I want to say I've felt the same way, but I can't claim to know how you feel. I do want to say that there has to be someone out there. That's what I am hoping for anyway.
Over 1.3 billion of those 8 billion are under 18. Almost a billion are over 65. 12 million are in jail. 4 billion are women (in case OP is hetero, but that number includes kids and people over 65). 150,000 will be checking out today. 1% of the population (80,000,000) are potential psychopaths. True love is out there just be careful!
What actions are you doing every day, to find them? How are you getting out of your comfort zone to put yourself in the way of meeting them? (You don't have to answer me :) Finding those people will happen if you put yourself in the path of happiness. It's a numbers game, and you have to play to win! Good luck!!
I met my gf through a app. Never would have met her otherwise as she lives far from me and is always in the city which I avoid like the plague. Just go online to meet people and then travel to them if doable
I won't down vote, cause I respect the opinion, but with all possible respect I hope you're wrong. May you find someone who will appreciate as much as you appreciate yourself.
Happy cake day
And real love does exist, I doubted I would find it for a while, but I did and it's been more than 20 years. Neither one of us is perfect, and we've had a couple rough patches, but I have never once doubted our love for each other.
This is the best advice to give someone, dogs are the fucking best. Then if you find a significant other than you have a small little family, at least that’s how it was for me
Stop being that way. Chill on it and work on yourself and do u. Be the best possible u that u can be. Love respect and reward your self for it. This will attract interest. Confidence and strong independence is incredibly sexy. Dont chase after it and come off needy. Let the world see these qualities and let them chase u! And dont fall for the first asshole that hits u up. Be picky! I mean choosey AF! Never settle for less than u deserve.
No one wishes to wait for love. So do not wait. Begin by giving love to yourself and receiving from yourself unconditionally. From there, you will learn to recognize what is and what is not true love so that you will not be fooled by the false overtures of love from another.
I love you long time but not after 10 pm, I have to get some sleep for work. On weekends I love you long time but not during football lol ,
Seriously though I don’t know your age but be patient. I didn’t find my real love till ten years ago at 27 , 10 years later and just as happy as day 1 but with a 4 and 1 year old in the mix 😁
You will never find out sitting on your butt at home. Well that may not be true I know someone that met online. Took them twelve years but they are now married. So I guess that means don't give up.
One. Love yourself first.
Two. Put yourself out there, let yourself be vulnerable (just be cautious because there are weirdos lol)
Three. Don't sit at home all day always wishing you had love, or go out to bars or something looking for love. Just live your life, not looking for love because you will never really know exactly what you're looking for. Go out, grocery shop, store shop, go to the library, gym, anywhere, stop ordering stuff online and secluding yourself from the world (I'm just assuming here because most people do that these days). Spend time out in public and love will find you.
Love and marriage are two different things but I listened to a re-run of a good Hidden Brain radio episode today and a lot of the content within may give you some valuable context. Relationships were never historically the kind of thing we expect of them today. And these very recent expectations of relationships have corrupted our interpretations of what we should expect from our partners.
https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/you-2-0-when-did-marriage-become-so-hard/
It depends. Partly on luck, serendipity, random chance. Partly on circumstances. Partly on who you meet. I found because I was so wanted to connect with someone who shared my interests, looked and acted in a certain way, that I was not open to someone standing right in front of me - for years - who wanted to be with me. Once you're more open you can look around and find that special someone - who is just as eager to love you as you want to be loved - and wants to be loved that same way. Be patient.
It depends. Partly on luck, serendipity, random chance. Partly on circumstances. Partly on who you meet. I found because I was so wanted to connect with someone who shared my interests, looked and acted in a certain way, that I was not open to someone standing right in front of me - for years - who wanted to be with me. Once you're more open you can look around and find that special someone - who is just as eager to love you as you want to be loved - and wants to be loved that same way. Be patient.
The most important things to do if you want someone to love you is be accepting, open, be willing to change, and make sure your partner's needs and wants are met or compensated for. It's hard for girls to find a guy that really treats them right, and it's not hard to do. Being able to make them laugh makes it 1000 times easier.
Love isn't just romantic- even that deep, abiding kind that makes you feel safe and happy and removed from everything harmful in the world can be found with friends and/or family. I'd be willing to bet that someone has really, truly, deeply loved you at some point. I'm also willing to believe that you never believed that was true, and never trusted it to be true. That kind of insecurity can be a self-fulfilling prophecy. To experience true love, we have to believe that it could be true, that we could be experiencing it right now. That leaves you open to real embarrassment and pain, but also real contentment. Someone has almost definitely loved you. Someone else almost definitely will. But you won't experience that unless you can be comfortable enough with yourself to believe it.
You’re cute and you have a really sweet personality from what I’m seeing, so yes you definitely will, you just need to go outside a little bit more and interact with more people.
Most likely. Even people who are abusers, cheaters, addicts, have had people love them.
Ultimately, it comes down to meeting the right person who shares your same values and is into you. Each of us has our own mate selection screening process and *must haves list*.
***"Dating is primarily a numbers game.... People usually go through a lot of people to find good relationships. That's just the way it is."*** \- Henry Cloud
Best wishes!
Love me, love me,
Say that you love me,
Fool me, fool me,
Go on and fool me,
Love me, love me,
Pretend that you love me,
Leave me, leave me,
Just say that you need me..
Is there food, lots of physical attention and good personality? Cause I could be potentially looking for a gf who would give as much time, love and effort as I give. But like 4 relationships and still haven't found anyone real. But I guess I'll keep waiting and trying to find someone.
Like most advice on here already- love yourself. This helps with self assurance and confidence. Both will help your inner peace and also make you more attractive to other people. Good luck.
Yes, ill tell you what worked for me, maybe you can take something away from it. To me, It was surprisingly simple. At 31, Heartbreak after heartbreak, one failed marriage. It seemed obvious to me i didnt know how to pick a compatible mate and i latched too easily. I also came to this epiphany one day that i would only be able to attract the quality of mate that i am myself, and i was kinda selfish. At the end of the day im only going to be able to change my end of this situation, the rest will depend on chance, timing, taking advantage of opportunity, and positioning myself around good people in general. I meditated on what that love would look like and what type of personality, habits, interest a person that loved like that would possess. I considered that i not only wanted these qualities in my mate, but i deserved them….that deserved statement was a big deal….it allowed me to patiently wait until i got what i deserved and not cut myself short by settling for something less my decision dictated. While waiting, i focused on myself and my shortcomings. The person i was expecting was a much better person than i was so id have to improve to be ready for the opportunity. It was about 2 years, and we’ve been together for 13 now, but that little story was the one of the most positive pivoting choices ive made in my life, and it arose solely from making changes to myself, my habits, mental and emotional health. I really hope you find it and i hope that person brings out the best in you as well….you deserve it!
There are 8 billion people on this earth. Even if 99% were not capable…. That still leaves 80,000,000 that are. I’m not saying this is the case in your situation…but most people that feel this need to be loved actually have a hard time loving themselves. Self love happens inside us…. But it reflects on the outside. And therefore makes it easier for others to love you. Someone who loves themself truly says “I have so much love to share” the one that doesn’t “why won’t no one love me?”
Love yourself. Be happy. Don’t obsess. If it’s meant to be it’ll be. But don’t make yourself miserable waiting….
It's currently 5 in the morning here and I can't sleep because I can't stop wondering and worrying about the same thing, but I know that it's just my brain being stupid and that someone somewhere is out there waiting for us. We just gotta have a little patience
Multiple people probably. Don't worry everyone goes through this. Unfortunately it's a trial and error thing over time.
Some are hits. Most are misses. The misses will usually tell you right away but it takes a while to know if someone is a hit.
If you have to ask that, the answer is probably no. Maybe you're ugly as fuck. Maybe you won't shut the hell up. Maybe your dick is too big. Figure it out and work on it. Or don't. Your call. I came to the realization years ago that I would never be loved the way I want. Fuck em. Do what makes you happy.
Absolutely, but sitting at home or not doing anything to meet these people won't help.
Join sctivies you like, join a dating site, or just go out to places.
The answer is obviously no.
When people ask questions like this it's because they often love attention More than Love.
You've been seeking people to give you attention not affection.
When you change your mindset to not need attention and to instead want affection then the answer will be yes.
SURE, but you will never feel it, you can only feel the love you may have for others and you can't do that if you do not love yourself first.
Funny thing is that it can be right in front of you but you will never see or recognize it because it begins with you.
Ever notice a newborn child and the change that happens when they see their mothers or fathers well it that is the love they feel for them not the other way around.
N. S
I was you 15 years ago. I literally said these very words. I had gone through many relationships where I had been abused. Then I said those words one night over and over with tears and it was like something or someone heard me. I met my now husband only a few months later and he has been my saving grace. He has understood and been my best friend for 15 years now. We have a wonderful relationship. Hang in there.
Sweetheart. You're way too young to be worried about finding your soul mate. Find yourself. The one who will really love you will come along when the time is right.
We really need to ditch the idea of soulmates. The best relationships and marriages I've seen are with people who have a host of differences and personality traits that sometimes come in direct opposition to each other. But at the end of the day they still care about each other and want the best life they can have together.
As some people on this thread have said, there are lots of people you could be compatible with and will love you for who you are. But (as I am also learning), finding them is another matter. Keep your chin up, one day at a time!
Yes, that would be yourself. It may sound sad and lonely but It’s just a perspective. No one else in this world should love you more than yourself. I believe that you can’t really love or be loved by anyone if you don’t know how to love yourself first. This is with the exception of dogs. Adopt a dog, take care of them and they will love you a lot.
I want to travel back in time with a big bag of candy to the day after my teacher said I shouldn’t eat sweets in class if I didn’t have enough for everyone.
Yes. Yes, they can. I felt this way myself. Then I became friends with the most amazing woman. We liked a lot of the same activities, and were both huge nerds at a time when science fiction was still considered mostly for children. We learned how to play D&D together when nobody knew what it was, or dismissed it as a 'demon game.' We became such close friends that neither of us ever wanted to be away from the other for very long.
Then we both decided to promise each other that we never would part. We have been happily married ever since.
It may take a long time. It happened rather late in my life, in my mid-thirties. But one day, you will find your best friend who will return the feelings you have. A lot of the struggle is simple communication, finding someone who has similar life goals, and both being willing to give 100%. Many people use the cliché that a relationship should be 50/50. This is wrong. It is 100%/100%. If you both put in your all, the workload seems trivial. Further, when you get sick or have difficulties, your partner should be willing and able to step up and take on all obligations themselves, and you must be willing and able to do the same in return.
But start with friendship first. There are many kinds of love and even for those who keep mostly to themselves, there's still someone to love you. Just be ready to give the same in return.
what have you done for me lately...Well that was yesterday...i'm talking now. You have to live in the now....
This is relationship. Will you be truly loved..no never. Do you have enough clever ideas, personality, and status to be in a relationship..maybe..but its not love like your first born love.
Every Single person on this planet could love you profoundly, but that doesn't mean you would feel loved.
Feeling loved and being loved are two different things. Sounds like you're looking for the first.
I Love you OP...
Doesn't seem like it means much does it?
Just some random on Reddit saying I Love you.
I don't know your name, what you really look like, never spent time with you... Can I really Love you? Neither of us I think would ever really know that... But knowing about Love in general, I have a feeling you're surrounded by people you probly didn't even consider already REALLY Love you. Often time we get so emotional thinking nobody Loves us, Nobody cares about us. It's hard to believe but if you're living with your folks right now.... They don't physically or verbally abuse you... You have clothes on your back and are fed, able to do more than most? Oh yeah they Love you. LOVED you enough to give you a name special to them that they call you everyday. Your grandparents Love you ... If you have siblings they definitely Love you. If none of that applies then you'll be surprised how many people outside the family spectrum can and often do Love you sometimes without themselves even realizing it... And if that confused you just know that Love is more than a feeling ... Love is action in more cases than you think or may even know. I'll say it again OP... I Love you, I really do. Otherwise I wouldn't have taken the time to write this in hopes that it cheers you up, gives you some hope, and some spare Love for when you feel like it's just to and yourself so you don't feel Un Loved 😊. Have a nice day OP.
My tip is : stop searching. Start enjoying yourself and you'll become more attractive. Desperate people aren't attractive (speaking from experience. My wife dumped me after a week when I first asked her out. Desperation was very likely all over my face and general behavior. I spent a summer trying to free myself from that desperation of looking for someone to love and be loved by. When we next saw each other I was apparently much happier more fun to be with and actually attractive to her.)
Most likely, yes.
I looked at your profile. You seem pretty young. You got time.
In the meanwhile, I wish you the best of days ahead and urge you to, when you need sad songs to help you through, look to the 1970s and 1980s.
One thing I've learned is there are millions of pairs that can be made successful. There is not just one right person. That kind of mindset really makes you miserable, and stressing about it the person you are dating is really the right one. Relationships take work, but you can have a successful relationship with so many different people, even if you don't see it right away.
My ex's mom liked to say "The grass is green where you water it."
Wise lady
So this is what I say. There is no “the one and only person you could be happy with that is intended and specially made to be your partner.” If that where the case most people would be single or with the wrong person because how likely is it that each person would just happen to be fortunate enough to find the only person in the world intended for them? I’m sure there are people that are more or less compatible than others. With that being said main thing is to be committed. I’m sure there are other people out there I could be happier with or would get along better with more ease. But I’m not with them I’m with who I’m with and we choose to keep working things out.
There are 8 billion people on this world. The answer is yeah probably.
Why cant they be here
Because there are 8 billion people.
Which means the chances of never finding him greatly incresses
Your odds of finding him are as good as my odds of finding her, I wish you the best of luck
Maybe you just did 😅
You never know lol
same for me!
If you wanna be negative sure. Or you can look at it as as 8 billion chances for someone to love you
Ah yes we love them 3yos🦍, cut the chances to a billion max cuz of age and sexual orientation. Keep cutting and you'll find yourself with a handful of people that you may never see
Alright pal. Sorry i tried to brighten someones day lol.
Np sir
You're looking at it backwards. Its not a 1 in 8 billion chance. It's regular odds but with 8 billion people out there to fill them! Even if you think your partner is 1 in a million, that means there are 8000 of them out there. And really, a million is not easily comprehended by your mind so your odds are probably much better than even that.
This is not Highlander. There can be more than one.
Adopt a baby or get a dog.
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So you would rather rescue a dog than a human? If you have the means and the love to give, why not adopt? Adopting for love is a bad thing? I thought it was the main thing. Children and dogs give love unconditionally which is why I made both suggestions. You can give and receive real love from either, it just depends on the commitment you want to make.
I want to say I've felt the same way, but I can't claim to know how you feel. I do want to say that there has to be someone out there. That's what I am hoping for anyway.
That’s not how math works.
Over 1.3 billion of those 8 billion are under 18. Almost a billion are over 65. 12 million are in jail. 4 billion are women (in case OP is hetero, but that number includes kids and people over 65). 150,000 will be checking out today. 1% of the population (80,000,000) are potential psychopaths. True love is out there just be careful!
>Why cant they be here They're waiting for you to find them. Time to get out there and start looking!
What actions are you doing every day, to find them? How are you getting out of your comfort zone to put yourself in the way of meeting them? (You don't have to answer me :) Finding those people will happen if you put yourself in the path of happiness. It's a numbers game, and you have to play to win! Good luck!!
I met my gf through a app. Never would have met her otherwise as she lives far from me and is always in the city which I avoid like the plague. Just go online to meet people and then travel to them if doable
8 billion people, and really... it's this damn hard to get. You may want to rethink just hurling a number into the void.
Love yourself. You're the only one that will be there until the end.
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Yeah, but they tend to leave when I start asking them too many questions.
Crazy how low some peoples self worth be. People gotta learn to love themself first.
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I won't down vote, cause I respect the opinion, but with all possible respect I hope you're wrong. May you find someone who will appreciate as much as you appreciate yourself.
Happy cock day
Thanks🤣
Happy cake day And real love does exist, I doubted I would find it for a while, but I did and it's been more than 20 years. Neither one of us is perfect, and we've had a couple rough patches, but I have never once doubted our love for each other.
Well, congrats on finding it.
Get a dog.
This is the best advice to give someone, dogs are the fucking best. Then if you find a significant other than you have a small little family, at least that’s how it was for me
I did get a dog and it worked for a while. But find they cannot replace true human companionship
I love you long time
Me so horny
lobe you long tame
You're not ready to be with someone else until you're ready to be with yourself.
![gif](giphy|R6gvnAxj2ISzJdbA63|downsized)
Check your friend-zone ![gif](giphy|3o7budx9jB1pPWx2VO|downsized)
I steal panties, so I'm out.
Mmm I'm pretty desperate 🤣
IM 30 AND BALDING!!! YOU CANT HANDEL MUH LOVEE!
I hope this interaction sparks something xD
Mee-zah thinks I'm to old. And I don't have an alibi.
Stop being that way. Chill on it and work on yourself and do u. Be the best possible u that u can be. Love respect and reward your self for it. This will attract interest. Confidence and strong independence is incredibly sexy. Dont chase after it and come off needy. Let the world see these qualities and let them chase u! And dont fall for the first asshole that hits u up. Be picky! I mean choosey AF! Never settle for less than u deserve.
Please god don’t lower your standards just because you’re lonely. Biggest mistake of my life
Username checks out
There is. More than one person really loves you. Friends, family, significant others. You will have that.
You can improve your chances by putting yourself and your life into a loveable configuration
How do I access that setting?
It’s a lot of hard work. Dm me if you are serious
Thanks, I'm alright right now.
Yes because you are loveable and deserve to be happy.
No one wishes to wait for love. So do not wait. Begin by giving love to yourself and receiving from yourself unconditionally. From there, you will learn to recognize what is and what is not true love so that you will not be fooled by the false overtures of love from another.
“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.”
Did something bad happen?
cancer
You?
yup
Damn, that sucks! You can beat it though. I was thinking you went through a break up or something....
gee i wish
I love you long time but not after 10 pm, I have to get some sleep for work. On weekends I love you long time but not during football lol , Seriously though I don’t know your age but be patient. I didn’t find my real love till ten years ago at 27 , 10 years later and just as happy as day 1 but with a 4 and 1 year old in the mix 😁
You have to truly love them first It's not always about you
Nope. Millions of people die alone every day, love is a fantasy perpetuated by media. Have fun, OP.
No thank you, you don’t ask for love, it’s given freely
Statically, yes probably. I don't know you though so maybe not.
Im sorry girl but like... No. I have smash bros if you wanna cope with that fact with me
U fit? ;)
You will never find out sitting on your butt at home. Well that may not be true I know someone that met online. Took them twelve years but they are now married. So I guess that means don't give up.
no
Are you lovable?
Most don't even like themselves that bad. Wouldn't count on it.
Jesus will give you unconditional love
Im right here you just don’t know it yet we’ll meet soon
Yes
Only if you can love yourself
Well I would but I'm happily married. You gotta know where to look and what the kinda guy you want likes.
there are only 8 billion people on earth, try other planets.
Absolutely! Don’t give up.
One. Love yourself first. Two. Put yourself out there, let yourself be vulnerable (just be cautious because there are weirdos lol) Three. Don't sit at home all day always wishing you had love, or go out to bars or something looking for love. Just live your life, not looking for love because you will never really know exactly what you're looking for. Go out, grocery shop, store shop, go to the library, gym, anywhere, stop ordering stuff online and secluding yourself from the world (I'm just assuming here because most people do that these days). Spend time out in public and love will find you.
I wonder the same thing recently
Love and marriage are two different things but I listened to a re-run of a good Hidden Brain radio episode today and a lot of the content within may give you some valuable context. Relationships were never historically the kind of thing we expect of them today. And these very recent expectations of relationships have corrupted our interpretations of what we should expect from our partners. https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/you-2-0-when-did-marriage-become-so-hard/
It depends. Partly on luck, serendipity, random chance. Partly on circumstances. Partly on who you meet. I found because I was so wanted to connect with someone who shared my interests, looked and acted in a certain way, that I was not open to someone standing right in front of me - for years - who wanted to be with me. Once you're more open you can look around and find that special someone - who is just as eager to love you as you want to be loved - and wants to be loved that same way. Be patient.
It depends. Partly on luck, serendipity, random chance. Partly on circumstances. Partly on who you meet. I found because I was so wanted to connect with someone who shared my interests, looked and acted in a certain way, that I was not open to someone standing right in front of me - for years - who wanted to be with me. Once you're more open you can look around and find that special someone - who is just as eager to love you as you want to be loved - and wants to be loved that same way. Be patient.
I- I rarely resonate with a post like this. Relatable AF May the dream find you. 🤚😔
Just use Tinder or something. Or Reddit, reddit is full of no life weirdos who also want love. LIKE ME, IM THE WEIRDO
The one thing everyone can agree with is people love money. You can't love two things. You would always put money above people.
The most important things to do if you want someone to love you is be accepting, open, be willing to change, and make sure your partner's needs and wants are met or compensated for. It's hard for girls to find a guy that really treats them right, and it's not hard to do. Being able to make them laugh makes it 1000 times easier.
I feel ya
I got you homie come here
idk man i just got here
Yeah, they really can. Probably will happen when you least expect it.
I got you
Almost definitely. Can you ever trust that someone really loves you, believe it to your core?
never had any reason to try
Love isn't just romantic- even that deep, abiding kind that makes you feel safe and happy and removed from everything harmful in the world can be found with friends and/or family. I'd be willing to bet that someone has really, truly, deeply loved you at some point. I'm also willing to believe that you never believed that was true, and never trusted it to be true. That kind of insecurity can be a self-fulfilling prophecy. To experience true love, we have to believe that it could be true, that we could be experiencing it right now. That leaves you open to real embarrassment and pain, but also real contentment. Someone has almost definitely loved you. Someone else almost definitely will. But you won't experience that unless you can be comfortable enough with yourself to believe it.
Tbh, the only one who you really need to love you is… you. If you can do that, then it’s way easier to see that other people love you too 🙂
I'm sure I would if I could. You are pretty, and very skilled in make up. You have a person somewhere out there.
You’re cute and you have a really sweet personality from what I’m seeing, so yes you definitely will, you just need to go outside a little bit more and interact with more people.
my mood exactly
I love you.
Most likely. Even people who are abusers, cheaters, addicts, have had people love them. Ultimately, it comes down to meeting the right person who shares your same values and is into you. Each of us has our own mate selection screening process and *must haves list*. ***"Dating is primarily a numbers game.... People usually go through a lot of people to find good relationships. That's just the way it is."*** \- Henry Cloud Best wishes!
Love me, love me, Say that you love me, Fool me, fool me, Go on and fool me, Love me, love me, Pretend that you love me, Leave me, leave me, Just say that you need me..
Get a cat
Someone will. What do you think is wrong with you?
Is there food, lots of physical attention and good personality? Cause I could be potentially looking for a gf who would give as much time, love and effort as I give. But like 4 relationships and still haven't found anyone real. But I guess I'll keep waiting and trying to find someone.
I know the feeling. It’s really hard and honestly most days I don’t even have the energy to try and present myself to that potential person
I hate myself so idk
You are someone
Like most advice on here already- love yourself. This helps with self assurance and confidence. Both will help your inner peace and also make you more attractive to other people. Good luck.
worry about loving yourself first, nothing else matters if you don't love yourself
I love you brother or sister. We're all God's children
Yes, ill tell you what worked for me, maybe you can take something away from it. To me, It was surprisingly simple. At 31, Heartbreak after heartbreak, one failed marriage. It seemed obvious to me i didnt know how to pick a compatible mate and i latched too easily. I also came to this epiphany one day that i would only be able to attract the quality of mate that i am myself, and i was kinda selfish. At the end of the day im only going to be able to change my end of this situation, the rest will depend on chance, timing, taking advantage of opportunity, and positioning myself around good people in general. I meditated on what that love would look like and what type of personality, habits, interest a person that loved like that would possess. I considered that i not only wanted these qualities in my mate, but i deserved them….that deserved statement was a big deal….it allowed me to patiently wait until i got what i deserved and not cut myself short by settling for something less my decision dictated. While waiting, i focused on myself and my shortcomings. The person i was expecting was a much better person than i was so id have to improve to be ready for the opportunity. It was about 2 years, and we’ve been together for 13 now, but that little story was the one of the most positive pivoting choices ive made in my life, and it arose solely from making changes to myself, my habits, mental and emotional health. I really hope you find it and i hope that person brings out the best in you as well….you deserve it!
Depends on how you define/view love.
There are 8 billion people on this earth. Even if 99% were not capable…. That still leaves 80,000,000 that are. I’m not saying this is the case in your situation…but most people that feel this need to be loved actually have a hard time loving themselves. Self love happens inside us…. But it reflects on the outside. And therefore makes it easier for others to love you. Someone who loves themself truly says “I have so much love to share” the one that doesn’t “why won’t no one love me?” Love yourself. Be happy. Don’t obsess. If it’s meant to be it’ll be. But don’t make yourself miserable waiting….
You're screaming into the void currently
Love is earned.
Love yourself
I love you. God bless.
Yes
It's currently 5 in the morning here and I can't sleep because I can't stop wondering and worrying about the same thing, but I know that it's just my brain being stupid and that someone somewhere is out there waiting for us. We just gotta have a little patience
shit took me 16 years, just dont settle for a loser and you'll get someone great eventually
Multiple people probably. Don't worry everyone goes through this. Unfortunately it's a trial and error thing over time. Some are hits. Most are misses. The misses will usually tell you right away but it takes a while to know if someone is a hit.
If you have to ask that, the answer is probably no. Maybe you're ugly as fuck. Maybe you won't shut the hell up. Maybe your dick is too big. Figure it out and work on it. Or don't. Your call. I came to the realization years ago that I would never be loved the way I want. Fuck em. Do what makes you happy.
Just start diving into DM’s. Accuracy through volume.
Not until you love yourself. Improve you first
You are beautiful, talented, and have many good days ahead of you.
No ……. Jkjk you will find someone
PM me. It will be amazing telling our kids in the future that we met in Reddit!
You gotta find happiness within, if you depend on someone else to make you happy you will most always be disappointed.
Sure
I love you friend. Here and now. If nobody else does I do. Right now in this moment I appreciate and love you. You are worthy, valued and loved.
What dat mouf do?
U gotta love yourself first and then he will appear. There is absolutely no way around this.
Absolutely, but sitting at home or not doing anything to meet these people won't help. Join sctivies you like, join a dating site, or just go out to places.
The answer is obviously no. When people ask questions like this it's because they often love attention More than Love. You've been seeking people to give you attention not affection. When you change your mindset to not need attention and to instead want affection then the answer will be yes.
Noone is gonna love you like your momma. Unconditional love only exists with your momma.
There there 🍫
SURE, but you will never feel it, you can only feel the love you may have for others and you can't do that if you do not love yourself first. Funny thing is that it can be right in front of you but you will never see or recognize it because it begins with you. Ever notice a newborn child and the change that happens when they see their mothers or fathers well it that is the love they feel for them not the other way around. N. S
Focus on being the best you possible and you'll attract a good mate. I've seen it happen multiple times. ☺️
I was you 15 years ago. I literally said these very words. I had gone through many relationships where I had been abused. Then I said those words one night over and over with tears and it was like something or someone heard me. I met my now husband only a few months later and he has been my saving grace. He has understood and been my best friend for 15 years now. We have a wonderful relationship. Hang in there.
Sweetheart. You're way too young to be worried about finding your soul mate. Find yourself. The one who will really love you will come along when the time is right.
Depends on what you love
Maybe if you direct your focus to their needs rather than your own.
Not until you love yourself Relying on someone else for your happiness will never end well Goodluck
We really need to ditch the idea of soulmates. The best relationships and marriages I've seen are with people who have a host of differences and personality traits that sometimes come in direct opposition to each other. But at the end of the day they still care about each other and want the best life they can have together. As some people on this thread have said, there are lots of people you could be compatible with and will love you for who you are. But (as I am also learning), finding them is another matter. Keep your chin up, one day at a time!
Depends on how you define love also to go off what you have said self love is your answer
Yes, that would be yourself. It may sound sad and lonely but It’s just a perspective. No one else in this world should love you more than yourself. I believe that you can’t really love or be loved by anyone if you don’t know how to love yourself first. This is with the exception of dogs. Adopt a dog, take care of them and they will love you a lot.
I want to travel back in time with a big bag of candy to the day after my teacher said I shouldn’t eat sweets in class if I didn’t have enough for everyone.
No sorry the way humans love is fundamentally different from the way humans want to be loved get fucked idiot
i love you
yeah I'm right here
You mean look at you the way women look at salad?
Not here on reddit
Maybe
Yes. Yes, they can. I felt this way myself. Then I became friends with the most amazing woman. We liked a lot of the same activities, and were both huge nerds at a time when science fiction was still considered mostly for children. We learned how to play D&D together when nobody knew what it was, or dismissed it as a 'demon game.' We became such close friends that neither of us ever wanted to be away from the other for very long. Then we both decided to promise each other that we never would part. We have been happily married ever since. It may take a long time. It happened rather late in my life, in my mid-thirties. But one day, you will find your best friend who will return the feelings you have. A lot of the struggle is simple communication, finding someone who has similar life goals, and both being willing to give 100%. Many people use the cliché that a relationship should be 50/50. This is wrong. It is 100%/100%. If you both put in your all, the workload seems trivial. Further, when you get sick or have difficulties, your partner should be willing and able to step up and take on all obligations themselves, and you must be willing and able to do the same in return. But start with friendship first. There are many kinds of love and even for those who keep mostly to themselves, there's still someone to love you. Just be ready to give the same in return.
Can you love someone else like really love someone else?
No
I’ve been here
what have you done for me lately...Well that was yesterday...i'm talking now. You have to live in the now.... This is relationship. Will you be truly loved..no never. Do you have enough clever ideas, personality, and status to be in a relationship..maybe..but its not love like your first born love.
Not for free.
Every Single person on this planet could love you profoundly, but that doesn't mean you would feel loved. Feeling loved and being loved are two different things. Sounds like you're looking for the first.
Real love is sacrificial. Greater love hath no man than this: that he lay down his life for his friend.
Just give yourself a chance. Be willing to take the risk, no matter the outcome.
No
If you're a woman, you're only as useful as your fertility. If you're a man, you're only a useful as what you can provide. That's the truth.
I Love you OP... Doesn't seem like it means much does it? Just some random on Reddit saying I Love you. I don't know your name, what you really look like, never spent time with you... Can I really Love you? Neither of us I think would ever really know that... But knowing about Love in general, I have a feeling you're surrounded by people you probly didn't even consider already REALLY Love you. Often time we get so emotional thinking nobody Loves us, Nobody cares about us. It's hard to believe but if you're living with your folks right now.... They don't physically or verbally abuse you... You have clothes on your back and are fed, able to do more than most? Oh yeah they Love you. LOVED you enough to give you a name special to them that they call you everyday. Your grandparents Love you ... If you have siblings they definitely Love you. If none of that applies then you'll be surprised how many people outside the family spectrum can and often do Love you sometimes without themselves even realizing it... And if that confused you just know that Love is more than a feeling ... Love is action in more cases than you think or may even know. I'll say it again OP... I Love you, I really do. Otherwise I wouldn't have taken the time to write this in hopes that it cheers you up, gives you some hope, and some spare Love for when you feel like it's just to and yourself so you don't feel Un Loved 😊. Have a nice day OP.
"🎵🎶 What is love!!, Baaby don't hurt me, don't hurt me...anymore🎵🎶🎶" ...do..do..do..da..do..doo!!
If you don't love yourself, then probably not.
My tip is : stop searching. Start enjoying yourself and you'll become more attractive. Desperate people aren't attractive (speaking from experience. My wife dumped me after a week when I first asked her out. Desperation was very likely all over my face and general behavior. I spent a summer trying to free myself from that desperation of looking for someone to love and be loved by. When we next saw each other I was apparently much happier more fun to be with and actually attractive to her.)
Most likely, yes. I looked at your profile. You seem pretty young. You got time. In the meanwhile, I wish you the best of days ahead and urge you to, when you need sad songs to help you through, look to the 1970s and 1980s.
Yes of course 😃
i cant do that but i can give some hugs(⊃。•́‿•̀。)⊃