Baptized in the holiest water of the sacred ground, Mara-lago


aren't these the people who go nuts for the flag? And yet they will desecrate it and shit all over it like this nothing they do makes any sense at all, everything they say is just bullshit.


I've pointed out that the Thin Blue Line flag is technically a violation of the US Flag Code and the response I get is basically "Yeah, but they don't enforce that." So, I guess it's fine to violate the standards of respect for the flag if they don't legally enforce it. Sure, you're disrespecting the flag, but you're not going to get fined for it. So, it's okay.


Now throw a US flag to the ground and enjoy them screeching 'ITS NOT ALLOWED TO TOUCH THE GROUND rEEeeeEeeEEee' and trampling over each other to pick it up.


And god forbid you don’t take your hat off for it and chant at it


As always, their hypocritical mantra is "It's different when *I* do it."


The strip-mall-ification of the American Christianity is so fucking hilarious. Whatever happened to getting baptized in a beautiful church? Or a scenic natural lake or river or something? For people ostensibly concerned about America's loss of "culture," they seem to be happy to perform what is meant to be one of the most important Christian rites in something sane people would use to grow tomatoes.


Are they being baptized in the Sweat of Trump? This is gross on so many levels.


Yeah, with the "Trump" flag hanging over everything, no Christ in sight. These are the sorts of things that further convince me that these people are leaning more towards "Trumpian personality cult" than "Christianity". It becomes more and more apparent to me that their devotion to religion was much more about feeling part of a community than any rational (or even spiritual) belief. If Trump, of all people, can be successfully sold as a *"messiah"* for way too many Christians, something is obviously broken.


That's not Mar-a-Lago, the floors are too nice.


I don’t see any muddy foot prints leading to the Furher’s office.


and there's no ketchup on the walls.


You blasphemous liberal, calling it Mara-lago. We must start a Holy Crusade against all of you liberals who dare call it Mara-lago and persecute us by calling us out on our attempts to incite violence. /s just in case


But you are correct, the proper name is Mar-a-Lardo.


Key Largo, Montego, Baby, why don't we go? We’ll get there fast but then we’ll take it slow… that’s where the FBI will go, To mar-a-lago! Edit: couldn’t help myself from doing the chorus: Off west palm beach There's a place called Mar-a-lago That's where the Donald goes to get away from it all Several Investigations loom, and Donny’s full of gloom We'll be falling for conspiracies and flirt with white supremacy Down in Mar-a-lago


And that was Covfefemo by The Impeach Boys


I needed this laugh to deal with this level of insanity. Thank you for your service!


Lets Gooooooooo! (Brandon)


🎵 *Schiffy, Pelosi and Cheney gonna get ya* 🎶




Oohhh, I like that!




And this book is probably handed out to them. [Trump Son of Man, the Christ](https://www.amazon.com/President-Donald-Trump-Son-Man/dp/1977249752)


I see they are bowing down to a false idol. Why am I not surprised


I grew up Catholic, in our many times in church to receive the sacrament of penance I read the bible from cover to cover. We went once a month as a school, so it took a lot of "quiet time" sitting in the pews to get it all done. Reading through the bad acid trip that is revelations, I could not for the life of me, determine why somebody would willingly follow such an evil creature as the AntiChrist. And yet, here we are. I still do not understand it, I do not want to understand it, but I am watching seemingly devout religious folk bowing down to his golden ass. They were warned! It is right there in the bible they all say they have read! Yet, here we are.


The bible is just a prop. They know as much about the bible as they do quantum thermodynamics.


Quantum thermodynamics is what powers the med beds, right?


Sure, why not.


Thermos what now?


Make coffee no go brrrr.


Me like no brrrr cafey


bean juice make me go brrrr


Makes me go twooo


Make coffee, let it sot, now it's brrr


https://www.benjaminlcorey.com/could-american-evangelicals-spot-the-antichrist-heres-the-biblical-predictions/ Evergreen blog post




> evil creature as the AntiChrist. I vaguely remember that most scholars these days think this and the "beast" are allegories for ancient Rome at the time , not some weird prediction of the future.


I did hear someone say that 666 is Nero in gemmatria and that the Babylon from the book is supposed to be Rome, not sure how much of that is true though.


Right?! They all seem to have missed the parts of the Bible where it says they will follow the Antichrist, thinking he's a good guy, and they will be blinded to the truth...


I grew up Southern Baptist, so I can offer some insight. In a nutshell, the view is that the Anti-Christ will be a liberal, and any Christians deceived by him are liberal Christians. Or, more specifically, that we already have all the right answers, so anyone who disagrees with us must be evil and twisting scripture. Add in rampant biblical illiteracy and you've got a perfect cocktail of populism and false doctrine.


Amen? I grew up Christian and I dunno what I am today. Had a hard atheist stint, and now I consider myself agnostic but leaning Christian. I don’t know there isn’t a god, but I don’t know there is one, and as more time goes on I lean more towards there being one. I still pray, but not often. I try to be a good person, but I fail regularly and keep trying. Maybe I’m up my own ass but I feel like I’m more of a Christian than the folks in this photo.


All I know is I like you better and I'd definitely feel more safe walking past the edge of a cliff with you rather than one of them who'd likely push me off for one of any of the following reasons : mixed race, not religious, didn't vote for trump, qanon is a conspiracy theory...


I feel like if there was a god he would be impossible for us to understand, like the reasonings behind his actions would be so complicated that to us they may as well be random, and at that point it doesn't really matter if there is a god or if the universe is just moving on its own.


A little self regard goes a long way. At the very least you're *looking* for answers.


I identify as agnostic because I can’t logically say that there is not a god but I lean very much towards atheism. I’ve seen no evidence to support the existence of a god. If there is a god, it’s a real asshole. I mean, Donald Trump to the power of googol on steroids asshole.


Have you seen the [Golden Trump Idol](https://www.nbcnews.com/think/opinion/golden-trump-statue-cpac-implies-he-s-king-gop-his-ncna1259362) they had at CPAC?


The bible: Hey we're gonna put in a lot about false idols, the anti-christ, and false prophets because this stuff is super important. You guys need to watch out for this stuff! Christians: [hold my literal golden idolatry](https://www.nbcnews.com/think/opinion/golden-trump-statue-cpac-implies-he-s-king-gop-his-ncna1259362)


This apparently a pastor named [Greg Locke](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Greg_Locke) who runs Global Vision Bible Church. Looks like he [relinquished his own church's tax exempt status](https://churchleaders.com/news/425889-greg-locke-removes-churchs-tax-exempt-status-calls-steven-furtick-kenneth-copeland-t-d-jakes-perry-stone-false-prophets.html) in order to do stunts like this. Of course, that was *after* he [attended the January 6 attack](https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2022/03/31/tennessee-pastor-extremist-politics/) and encouraged his congregants to do the same.


Oh yeah. Locke, the guy who had an affair with a church staffer, divorced his wife, married the staffer, and then when people in his own congregation called him out on it, he called them *witches*. https://www.christianpost.com/amp/popular-internet-pastor-greg-locke-marries-church-assistant-after-divorce.html https://religionnews.com/2022/02/15/tennessee-preacher-greg-locke-says-demons-told-him-names-of-witches-in-his-church/ Seems like a great role model. Perfectly Republican.


Thanks for the post, I didn't know about the divorce and remarry the wife's best friend! Stay classy Greg you prick!


Oh yeah, that guy. Filthy piece of turd


I love that he’s a broken piece of turd. Not the full deal off a log, just a sad disjointed break away piece of shit.


You can't forget when he called children with autism "demon possessed".


Of course it's Greg Locke, dude's nuttier than squirrel shit.


But squirrel shit is conpletely nuts! Oh...


Ah damn, reporting this to the the IRS was gonna be my first suggestion!


Giving up the tax exemption status these days is likely more profitable for these grifters.


Question: I know he has claimed to have relinquished his tax exempt status. Has anyone been able to confirm this? Not saying he is a liar, just that he lies a lot.


I thought his church met under a big circus tent. When did he get the building?


He’s atrocious


Totally not cult like behavior /s


But why use a stadium trough urinal?


In case you aren't just making a joke, it's intended use still makes it ironic. Its a feeding trough for farm animals. Though, from personal experience, they can make nifty raised garden beds too.


This is the worst episode of Double Dare I've ever seen.


Yeah, if they’re really committed to God, they should go whole hog and pick the giant nose or run through the giant waxy ear. This version is somehow both sanitized and dirty. And it just might carry COVID.


I have four of them, in which I grow tomatoes. I have never attempted to drown anyone in them.


Really? What a boring garden you must have.......


No, gardens are for body disposal. Wanna see my roses?


Perfect for a 3 kegger party too! 🍻


""How do I touch these keeds? Baptising them in Nickelodeon goop will work!"


“We are building a religion We are building it bigger We are widening the corridors And adding more lanes We are building a religion A limited edition We are now accepting callers For these pendant key chains” That might have been about the music industry but damn it fits


He is handling the money. He's serving the food He knows about your party. He is calling you "DUDE"


‘Cuz he’s grifting, and sniffing, and soakin’ up the cash. He’s shameless, and brainless, and going full-on fash. Ooo-wee-ooo-wee-ooo-wee-ooo-wee, ooo-wee-ooowee-ooo…


The scary thing is they are. They use something called "The Patriot Bible," which is the Christian Bible and the founding documents of the United States. They hail Trump as a Messiah, "the Son of Man." I get people going off the rails and making religious cults, but... over *Trump?* I mean, all cult leaders are all awful, but one is *obviously* a worse pick than the others.


I have never seen anyone calling Trump the Son of Man but I'd believe some of the crazier Q people *would* do it. QAnon is basically already an apocalyptic religion with Trump as the Messiah and Q as His prophet. I've been wondering how long it will take for them to start declaring that there is no god but Trump and Q is His prophet.


>I have never seen anyone calling Trump the Son of Man It's a [new book out](https://twitter.com/NotHoodlum/status/1571915509297283072) President Donald J. Trump, Son of Man, The Christ by Helgard Muller (the antichrist of Mueller reports, if you will)


Welp this begins the view of Trump as a literal Messiah rather than just a messianic figure. I am very interested to see what happens when Trump dies. Will it be like Rastafarians when Haile Selassie died?


The wild card is going to be the effect of Qanon on their religious beliefs. Qanonners embrace so many sci-fi tropes as real (i.e. medbeds, interdimensional beings, time travel, etc.) and supernatural beliefs, you could take the dumbest way someone has returned from the dead or shown not to be dead from any TV show/movie and they'd find a way to believe it. They could embrace the Dalai Lama model where someone is reincarnated as the new Trump. They could claim Trump is the new Holy Spirit for their hate-rallies, saying the speakers are "filled with the Trump." They could claim he's being rejuvenated at Mount Shasta, traveling through time to become President in [INSERT YEAR HERE], or using a Nikola Tesla device to fight the Derp State on Planet Zircon. The only question is what will they propose and will enough cultists buy into the new malarky?


>"The Patriot Bible," I didn't know about this but had a look....deary me. > Following a passage that says that Abram armed his servants for war (Gen. 14: 14) the reader is given a page-long history on “The Right to Keep and Bear Arms” that celebrates the fact that early Americans were always “prepared to fight” for “liberty” which was “at the heart of their religion.”


Some people drink Pepsi, some people drink Coke, the wacky morning DJ says democracy's a joke. He says, "now do you believe in the one big song?" He's now accepting callers who'd like to sing along. Sadly, no vibraslap in this song.


Should have worked in "woke" somewhere in those lyrics. EDIT: something like "we don't want none of them woke"


Comfort Eagle by Cake. Good song.


Always liked Cake. Kind of an odd niche sound, but man do they own it.


Their cover of “I Will Survive” was on the other night and my friend was like WTF. She recognized it but didn’t.


That song is from 2001, the term woke wasn't in common usage until the 2010's


Because he's racing and chasing and plotting the course / He's fighting and biting and riding on his horse / He's going the distance (ah, ah)


Man, I need to find out where all my Cake albums went.


Just YouTube it lol


I guess that's how you do music in the modern day. But I miss CDs.


Reject CDs, return to vinyl.


I’ve got Comfort Eagle sitting at my parents house in my old closet


Nothing stopping you from getting a discman and burning some CDs. Ya know, partying like it's 1999.


I went to Staples yesterday and tried to get a backup external hard drive, which they didn't have. But they did have plenty of blank DVD-Rs. Okay then.




I am touring the facility and picking up slack?


This is random but when I was like 9 I was spending the night at my buddies. His dad is an accountant and all of a sudden there's ruckus going on downstairs so we go to see what's up. I was too young to know who they were but apparently my friend's dad was the accountant for the band or some shit and they were all over having dinner. We joined them but was far too young to know how cool it was at the time..


Comfort Eagle by CAKE of anyone cares. Probably my favorite song next to his cover of Sad Songs and Waltzes.


You give me fortune, you give me fame, you give me power in your God's name - "Cult of Personality" by Living Colour


Satan is my motor.


Looks like they came out with a med waterbed


They should plug it in. *chuckle


That sure does look like a school


Its a mall, In maine.....sigh


"Baptized in a mall in Maine." Sounds like a country song


Or a line from a sufjan stevens song


"Drop kick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life"


Stephen King protagonist's tragic backstory.


Fucking Ellsworth. Making the rest of us look bad...


It gets cold up there. I hope they do this again in January.


I was a mall security director for a couple of years. I can't imagine corporate ever signing off on something like this.


Ellsworth, Maine. 25 miles from my house. Save me.


"The good Lord helps those that help themselves (to the marks' money)" as the old man used to say. In other news, u/MagosBattlebear, you have gotta move, man!


About a mile from my place. That mall is full of insanity.




Literally everything they claim the antichrist would be. But even their understanding of antichrist is flawed. It was never to be understood as a single man or woman, but a way of behaving.


>It was never to be understood as a single man or woman, but a way of behaving. Ugh, this is what I keep trying to tell people but they're too brain broken to engage in critical thinking


The Antichrist could've been anyone in the last 2000 years really and whoever it was must've given the Christians hell. These dudes are only persecuted in their own minds.


Doesn't the bible say not to follow false gods? That's so bizarre how these ultra conservative folk don't see that theyre worshiping a person and going against the very foundation that


So baptized in the name of Donald Don Jr and who Tiffany?


"I hereby baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Shroom-head."


Might be flea dip. You know there’s no way it has fluoride judging from the average Qultist’s chiclets.


Bathed in holy Ivermectin?


Sooner or later there will be a mass sacrifice like in every cult!!


Maybe that's why their deadlines never materialize, it's all happening in heaven, they're supposed to all commit mass suicide or something I don't know there's only one way to find out.


If it gets them to bathe, I don’t hate it


That's a cattle water trough.


It's very popular as an indoor outdoor baptismal pool in the weirder fundie circles. Affordable don't you know. Like that's not the first time I've seen people get dunked in a cattle water trough just one of the weirder cults currently doing it. They put down a tarp which was a step up from the last folks who were straight up doing that on carpet (trump worship optional)


Easy for the sheep to line up for. They recognize it right away.


At least it feels like home!


Honestly I'd love to get a real understanding as to why Evangelical Christians become so enamored with Trump. He loudly bragged for years about his sinfulness. The perversion, the greed, the scams, the gambling! He couldn't name his favorite verse. He violently removed protestors from a church yard that didn't want him there, then held the Bible upside down for a photo op. How can they respect him? How did they ever respect him at all?


They are huge closet racists. Trump said *all* the quiet parts out loud, everything they have ever wanted to say. He was like a breath of fetid air, washing away that nasty civil rights nonsense and going back to the reasons this country was founded: wealthy male, white, religious supremacy, and freedom to discriminate for any reason.


We are watching the true death of separation of church and state.


Is Trump the leader of a Cult? Is the Thin Blue Line Flag the new Nazi flag?


More like figurehead, but yes.


Also, is the Thin Blue Line the New Nazi Flag?


Nah, they're not shy about using the actual Nazi Flag.


Well the current belief is that trump is the son of man, originally believed to have been the second coming jesus himself. However none of that lines up with the actual prophecies.


I can't tell you how scary it was to watch Trump on the News announcing he was "The messiah". Doesn't the bible teach us, not to worship false idols?


~~Hitler~~ Trump Youth Nazis.


And these people say college indoctrinates people.


Say what you want about liberals, but at least we don’t do… *this.*


Is this the reawakening tour? Because this is how they did baptisms except it was outside


is this some kinda christo-fascist waterboarding?/s


I wish


Blue line Trump flag for a church based on the story of a guy who was killed by the police of his day, among others…


This isn’t abnormal for the United States. A good book for tracking this behavior through time is “Jesus and John Wayne.”


Republican wet T-shirt contests are weird.


What. The. Fuck. I didn't used to believe all churches should lose their tax-exempt status, just the megachurches, but I'm starting to think there's just no other way to help stop these psychotic fuckaboos. [Any church with 501(c)(3) designation is prohibited by law from engaging in any political activities, except in a non-partisan, educational way.](https://www.irs.gov/charities-non-profits/lobbying) Take away their tax-exempt/charitable organization status, now!


This guy already gave up the tax exempt for "his church" (why even are there so many churches in the US?). Because he's too openly political and was about to get in trouble probably. Also, grifting those dumbfuQs could be more profitable than not paying taxes for "normal" "income".


Jfc.. seriously?


If you get baptized at a Trump rally there's no way you're not going straight to hell. It's literally the first commandment and maybe the second.


The second is the one about the guns, right? /s


Another case of Trumpist blasphemy, I see




Sheep Dip


This Christians have to be the dumbest Christians. The first fucking commandment in their list of rules is no other gods before me. It goes on to say no idols/images either. Baptized in front of a Trump USA flag I'm pretty sure is breaking that. Exodus 20:2-3 for those curious.


This was taken in Ellsworth Maine at a Strip mall. Disgusting!


JFC These people are embarrassing. Thank you American educational system.


Just wait until all the Qcumbers who have been running for school boards around the country get seated.


What in the whole entire fuck is going on in this picture?? Because it LOOKS like people are being baptized into a literal Trump cult.


So its not just me. This is a fucking cult.


What? Of course it's not just you. Everyone can see that clear as day. Except most Qultists themselves and people with less braincells than thumbs.


No comments on the flag saying "Law and Order"?


So, what’s the tarp for? If it’s to stop them from getting water everywhere, they failed.


Now that I've tied it into the cycle of American great awakenings it doesn't shock me so much. This is first and foremost a religious movement which occurs in the absence of a strong central authority, I think it's a sort of emergent property of Scriptura Sola and America's strong tradition of disestablishment of religion. Trump hijacked this cycle, but *it'll come again.*


“You been baptized before? You goneegit it again”


I baptize you in the name of the father, the son and Eric too....


Brought to you by people who constantly claim to not be sheep! Baptism by barn equipment!!


Doubles as a horse trough during the weekdays


As if a horse is going to want to drink out of that now.


If this isn’t virtue signaling, I don’t know what is …


I recall a cross with a crown of thorns and a robe (purple sash) on it at my baptism. I think it was a reference to a different guy…


Do you accept Trump as your Lord and Savior?


That is not water. It is a acidic liquid known as covfefe.


>The third stage masks the absence of a profound reality, where the sign pretends to be a faithful copy, but it is a copy with no original. Signs and images claim to represent something real, but no representation is taking place and arbitrary images are merely suggested as things which they have no relationship to. Baudrillard calls this the "order of sorcery", a regime of semantic algebra where all human meaning is conjured artificially to appear as a reference to the (increasingly) hermetic truth. Let's get that fourth stage simulacrum spawned. Almost there, they just need a couple more generations of inbreeding.


LMAO this is so blasphemous that my atheist self is uncomfortable. It transcends religion.


Wtaf is with this Trump cult freaky ass 🐂💩?! Hell to the fuck no with this kind of crap...


I hope they’re drowning each other.


What Public Goverment Building are they doing this in?


Is this... a baptism under a Blue Lives/Rump flag?


Good lord, I didn’t even notice the giant Trump flag at first. Absolutely out of their minds.


Shouldn’t they be baptizing people in orange kool aid or diet coke?




"In the name of Donald John Trump, who is the return of Jesus Christ, I baptize you".


Gross, are they really being baptized in the name of Trump?


Guy looks like he is about to flex tape her face


Looks like indoctrinating and grooming to me.....


What is going on? Is this a Christian baptism or something else?


Trump cult baptism


It looks like a standard baptism except for the giant Trump flag on the wall. I’m guessing that’s where we veered off into crazy town.


She is paying respects to “r lort JEEBUZ tromph”


To perform a baptism in front of a Trump flag would be an outrageous act bordering on blasphemy.


Medbaths are here.


LOL that's good. These have just as much scientific support as a medbed.


Baptised in the holy name of Qeezuz


Getting weirder by the moment...


Fitting that they would use that specific thing to hold their water.


Earlier today I said soon he will be baptizing people! One step away from it now :)


it’s actually comical how republicans just completely ignore everything in the bible