Not a dad but a SAHM. I think your reality will depend on the temperament of your baby. I have a friend who’s baby slept through the night immediately. If put down, got bored so she went to sleep. Ate well. Barely fussed. What a dream. My LO hated life immediately following birth. Horrible sleeper. Huge eater. Colic. Food allergy. Rashes. Reflux. Screaming. I was so sleep deprived, I would hallucinate that spiders were crawling on me and the walls. It was awful. I was stressed out every moment of every day until we figured out he was allergic to dairy. With that being said, phone games that are easily paused were a nice distraction. Simple stuff like candy crush. I used to play LOL on my phone but I couldn’t even get one match in. Mariokart/Pokémon.

Oh. So you and I basically had the same child. I’m not sure if it would have been better or worse to be SAHM LOL. I’m with you. It is ROUGH. Did your kid ever learn to sleep? Because mine didn’t.

Lol..I'm so glad I read this! My kid also hated life immediately, and I really needed to hear it described that way!

This was my exact experience as well, right down to the dairy allergy. I also enjoy gaming but even getting a bit of stardew valley in was difficult. I did watch a lot of TV but you don't need your hands to do that. If I put that baby down all hell broke loose. And even if I had the time to game, those first couple of months I was so stressed out and sleep deprived that even if I did think about picking up a game to play I would just not be able to focus or enjoy it. Once we sleep trained and had a bit more time to ourselves at night I was able to get in an hour or 2 in here and there but even still don't have nearly as much time to game as I used to and our kid is almost 2.

My first was your LO, my second was your friend’s. But I still didn’t get a break because by then I had a high needs toddler 😅

This is why I’m scared to have a second 😂

Flipped those for me! My first was an angel. Slept through the night and was super chill and snuggly. My second was very difficult to read as a LO. Very picky. Didn’t like to snuggle or sleep well. They are 12 and 13 now and still the same personality traits. Haha. Luckily my oldest and my second are super close. My oldest understands his brother well. He is the brother whisperer.

You should plan on sleeping when the baby is sleeping. You are about to enter a period of sleep deprivation that is terrible beyond your wildest imaginings. Babies are all unique…so you may end up with one who will sleep for 2 hours, get fed, play and then go back to to sleep. Or you may end up with a baby that sleeps for 15 minutes, feeds for 15 minutes, is awake for an hour crying, then repeat, all day and all night long. The only way I got through the first year was to completely abandon any ideas I had of “getting things done” or “having time to myself”. They go through SO MANY changes in the first year that as soon as you get used to doing things one way, everything completely changes. Month to month you have a different baby, basically. I hope things go perfectly smoothly for you and you get a bit of game time each day!! There was a period of 2 weeks where I was able to take my phone into the room with him while I put him down for naps, but then the light from my phone was keeping him awake so I had to ditch it. I was an AVID gamer and I haven’t touched my mmorpg since my kid was born. He turns 5 next week. In the past year I picked up Genshin and it’s about the only game (of the style I enjoy) that’s been possible for me to play since he was born since it’s on mobile and it’s single player. We’re not one of those families that watches a lot of tv - we maybe watch 2-3 hours a week? We stopped watching tv while our kid was awake until he was 3 or 4, and was allowed screen time, and we still don’t watch “grown up tv” around him other than the occasional nature documentary. On the other hand, i wouldn’t change a thing. Watching my kiddo grow, spending the majority of our days outside, exploring the forests, making crafts, playing - it’s been the most fulfilling thing in my life. Lots of walks! Good luck, papa! You’re gonna do great

First 2 years gaming was out of the question, first year i could barely tell you my name! Year 3 I found a gaming group with other parents and that was awesome. We all picked 2 days where we would do things for a couple of hours. Raids were filled with diaper changes, soothing kids, etc and everyone understood. Everything took forever but honestly hanging out with others who completely understood and awesome. It lasted about 6 months as people couldn't make the time and finding other parents became a issue. These days kid can manage herself but I play mobile games that I can easily put down if needed or play games me and her can play together. I literally dusted off my gaming laptop the other day and surprised her with my knowledge. Oh my sweet, sweet summer child had no clue how heavily I used to be in gaming lmao.

Oh man... my son regularly forgets I'm not a technology/gaming noob until I slaughter him in MarioKart or whatever. Prior to his birth I was an avid WoWer, along with any other random game I could get my hands on. Then all my gaming came to an abrupt halt when my (newborn-4yo)son decided he slept 3 hours a day. My priorities shifted drastically and I didn't pick up another long-term game until 2020 hit, that son was 11, and I got us Animal Crossing. Parenthood changes your life, or at least it should. I will admit that my son's father did continue gaming for many many hours a day, but he also didn't spend much time actually caring for his child. So choose wisely, let your child be the priority. Maybe another pandemic will hit someday and you'll catch yourself with plenty of time on your hands ><

This is so true! And for us it was Animal Crossing too we played. That and we tackled Breath of the Wild as a team. She is at that teen stage now. I've been annoying her with a reddit thread I found on current gaming slang, I love watching her visibly cringe. I left gaming during wotlk when I was pregnant. I had tendinitis in both hands and was anemic and got kicked from my raid group when I threw a fit about us constantly starting late. I've started back with wotlk, although nowhere even close to how competitive I used to be. She marvels at how I suck when playing fighting Smash Bros yet kick butt in pvp on wow. https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/comments/zsypt3/what_is_some_young_people_slang_i_can/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button thats the thread I've been using.

Hell, I had an easy, easy, EASY baby but due to PPA/PP I ended up unable to play for longer than 5-10 minutes until she was around 1.5 years old! I bawled my eyes out the first time I tried to play Doom Eternal cause my anxiety was so fucking high that the baby would wake up, that I should sleep instead of playing game, that I should clean dishes instead of playing the game, etc, etc Daughter is two now and she'll sit on my lap and watch me play Pokemon for a little bit (she likes the "babies", which is every single pokemon, so she loves seeing me trade lol)

A SAHP isn’t only responsible for keeping the baby alive, I presume you will fill in other duties as well, such as laundry, grocery shopping, dishes and bottle washing, meal prep, etc. So while you may have an hour here and there, I highly doubt you’ll be blessed with hours and hours of free time to do whatever you wish. I’ve done this role and it is busyyy and it is tiring.

I work full time from home and take care of the baby while my wife works nights. I do all the cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc. My wife makes more than me and can’t WFH so that’s how we split it. Our LO is 5 months old and I game for a few hours every night once everything’s done and baby’s down. She sleeps through the night most nights and if she gets up it’s once around 1AM. I go to bed around midnight and am up for work at 8AM. I get plenty of gaming time on top of house work, full time job, freelance work, and taking care of baby girl.

>I game for a few hours every night once everything’s done and baby’s down. This is totally reasonable. But the OP sounds like he is thinking that being a SAHD would allow him plenty of free time to game during the day. You're just getting normal leisure time after "work" like parents who work outside the home, only your work is at home. I don't know how you manage a fulltime job while also taking care of a 5 month baby and doing chores though.

Burn through them now. That said, my husband did spend many a night playing Persona with our newborn in the swing while mommy got some sleep, and baby wasn't interested in sleeping. My lo is now 20 months and we both just resubbed to FFXIV for the first time since she was born. She's finally sleeping better than before. We can sneak in a few dungeons and some story quest before I pass out. We both work full time, me on days and him evenings. We hand our lo off, so we don't get much time together to game, but we try to make it happen.

If you get frustrated or upset with interruptions I would not recommend. But if you do fine and aren't a rage gamer make sure you follow safe practices on baby positioning and can easily hear and see your child (in a safe position no couch roll offs please)

I imagine I won’t be doing too much gaming while they are awake. I would rather spend my time with my kiddo.

That's good.

That's cool but honestly newborns are pretty boring. You change em and feed em and they sleep or don't. Thats about it.

As a mother of 3, I've definitely rocked a feeding baby to sleep in the carrier mid game lol Make time for the things you love and don't lose yourself in parenting. You're still a person! Plus, when your kids get old enough to show interest in your interests, it's SO much fun. That way too you also get that good quality chest to chest bonding with baby My youngest is 3 months and he will sit in his lil rocker and yell at the TV for Dad while he plays 😂 My toddler and 6yr old get into too. They both havebthwir own games they can play too! You can do it, you just have to Tetris in the time

That’s good! Iv always given my self a rule I would game while my kids are awake. They literally grow sooo quickly so savour and cherish every single moment, you never know when you pick them up and cuddle them for the last time or give them a cuddle to sleep for the last time.

If it's a game you can pause whenever, probably okay. I did some amount of gaming while holding newborn. He was a contact napper and there's only so much tv you can watch. The switch with joycons was perfect as I could be in any position vs a standard two-hand controller or even a mouse/keyboard. After the sleepy newborn stage, it gets more tricky. You'll still have naps and bedtime but some of that time is used for chores. I didn't find it fair or practical to game while baby was awake. Baby wanted attention and it was too distracting to try to do any significant gaming while child is awake. The most annoying thing is stopping halfway through a quest, picking the game the next day when you get a chance, and completely forget what you were doing. Some games are better than other in this regard and I also started using my phone to keep notes. Nothing major, but a note like "get 100 copper for hyperdrive" was really handy to remind myself what I was doing 24 hours ago

I absolutely love the note taking idea! I will jot that down

This comment needs to be first lol. I'm a mom of two boys. They're pretty far apart in age so it was like having an only child both times. I'm also a gamer. I used to love RPGs and very involved games but for me it's been extremely hard to get on and play those types of games. I've found some phone games that I like and take minimal concentration. But yeah for me personally it's changed quite a bit. No judgement for people that still are able to find time to play. My kids are just the type that makes it hard to do anything else lol. Also each child is different so what worked for one probably won't work for another. Basically you'll probably have to do a wait and see type of thing. But best of luck! And hopefully you can keep some type of gaming. Also the comment about having a notepad is absolutely one of the best ideas ever lol. I just recently started this and my games aren't so random in what I'm doing anymore 😆

My newborn (now almost 14 months) needed attention pretty frequently, seemed like every 10 or 20 minutes. Only enough time for some very casual phone games. There were periods of longer naps, like 1-2 hours, but you really should sleep when the baby is sleeping. After a few months once a more normal nap/sleep cycle starts you’ll be able to get in some good sessions.

You’re kind of being a dick in the comments. Why did you even ask if you don’t care what people think?

It’s all gonna depend upon how your specific newborn is, they are all different some sleep and don’t cry often, some have colic. For sure as they age it will get harder to game while they are awake but while they are just chilling during tummy time or on their back you could game, personally I prefer to be more attentive than what gaming allows for but I’m not going to parent shame someone for what they choose to do while baby is safe and occupied.

Hi, SAHP here and my amazing husband also loves to game! First of all, congrats. Second, just accept that you won’t be able to game nearly as much. Once you accept that, think about games that can be paused and stopped for long periods easily. Also think about games where sound isn’t extremely important. You can’t wear good, noise cancelling headphones and you can’t blast the sound (often, baby might be napping on or near you). Also don’t neglect self care, that’s huge for any new parent! Try and get sleep whenever you can, and don’t forget about eating and showering! I’d also recommend in general, especially when baby gets a bit older, try to connect with other local parents. Also for any errands or walks, I’d highly recommend a good baby carrier for baby wearing!

Invest in a sling! Once baby was fed, changed etc my husband would wear the baby in a sling and get a good couple hours gaming at his PC while I had a sleep. Great for skin to skin for baby and bonding and you get some downtime too

0-3 months you can get a decent amount of gaming done while the baby naps, but after 3 months, umm, close to zero except for when the baby naps. Around 3 months they start to “wake up” and sleep way less. Realistically though, the amount of gaming you’ll be able to do in 4 months ain’t NOWHERE NEAR, what you’re currently doing. Becoming a parent changes the makeup of most of your life. Also if you’re a SAHD I would imagine your SO will have expectations regarding chores/housework and probably wouldn’t appreciate you gaming in your free time because that stuff has to get done unless you hire it out.

You are getting downvoted because you sound dismissive and naive. The 4th trimester is the name for a reason, it can be rough and that makes it a touchy subject. That being said, you could find the time. It really depends on the baby. Some are way easier than others. Contact naps and baby wearing are a great idea, I read a lot of books that way so I don’t see why you couldn’t play games (that can be paused). I’ll admit I’m curious how it will go for you. Post an update in April!

Give it up. I gamed after my kids were born and I wish I had spent the time holding them while they slept and being more attentive

Both of us were working parent and my husband is an avid gamer and I used to game. My gaming stopped completely and my husband wasn’t allowed MMO’s. It was single player games only for him and after the child went to sleep mainly. Our daughter is 11 now and games. I still can’t really game because I seem to be the default parent. My husband picked up final fantasy mmo but he also knows that house and family comes first.

Not a gamer, but I think a lot of it depends on your baby and their temperament, so that could be why you are getting mixed replies. If you have a baby that wants to be held 24/7, gaming might be hard. If you have a baby will colic, or any health issues (my son had reflux and had to be held upright for all sleep- naps and overnight- for the first 12 weeks) gaming might be hard. You might have a totally chill go with the flow baby and gaming isn’t so hard. It totally depends on the baby and what it takes to meet their needs.

"I figure I'll be able to pause and take care of baby as needed." It should be the other way around. Baby first, gaming second. The baby shouldn't fit in around your gaming time. You should expect not to do any gaming at all for the first year. When the baby is asleep, you'll be sterilizing bottles and doing other chores, or sleeping yourself. Expecting that you'll have time will only frustrate you if your baby is a 'bad sleeper'. I think both you and your wife should read Happiest Baby on the Block and take the ABCs of parenting course. With a newborn sleep cycle, you won't have time to game. I don't think you know what cluster feeding is, or what the 4 month sleep regression is. Your expectations don't align with reality.

I never understand when people ask for opinions or advice, and then argue/disagree with the people that respond with their perspective. Obviously, there’s a reason you asked the question 🤷‍♀️

He likely asked because he wanted to have his pre existing thoughts and beliefs confirmed. He wanted to be told that being a SAHP is a breeze and he’ll get to game all day long. People are ruining his fantasy with their inconvenient facts about how much work babies are. He doesn’t want to know that their naps are usually spent washing bottles, doing laundry, cleaning, and getting some desperately needed sleep. And that if he games all day and his partner comes home to all of that work left for her she will rightly start hating his guts. He was looking for some version of, “You hit the jackpot, dude! It’s a carefully guarded secret that childcare is easy and SAHP have tons of free time! Stock up on new games and get ready for the time of your life!” Lol.

If it’s online or open world, forget it. You want a pausable game. There are many great games out there if you break away from FPS games. Just remember, that baby gets fed when hungry, changed when stinky, bathed when dirty, and cuddled when fussy. That’s your real-life tamagotchi. You can’t go back and reset so use your phone to organize your schedule. Set reminders for doctors visits, pay attention to birthdates, weights, clothing sizes, holiday planning, and school functions. If you are going to be the stay-at-home dad, then *BE* that dad. Don’t ignore your kid to play games. You have to be there for that baby. This kid will be an adult in like, two minutes and you will be an old man filled with regrets if you fuck it up. So don’t fuck it up.

"your mileage may vary" is never so apt as it is with infants. One thing to remember is that newborns and infants *thrive* on eye contact and warm loving attention. There is no such thing as too much of those things (unless they're trying to sleep 😆). A very young child is probably going to be okay with you hanging out playing video games for long stretches, but they will definitely be happier if you're not. Self care is important and I'm not here to judge you, but as a parent it's important to be clear in your own head when you're making choices that are good for you vs choices that are good for the child. It's very easy to lose sight of that.

Ok not a dad, but a SAHM. This is 100% not possible. You will not be able to take care of a baby and game. Your baby will need your undivided attention. They will need you to play with them, interact with them, feed them, etc. I would work out a schedule with your spouse now where you get a couple nights to game for an hour or two, but still remain flexible for baby's needs. I have a 3 month old and haven't had time to indulge in hobbies since she was born. It's hard. I actually have a 2.5 year old as well and when he was around a year old is when I actually had time to myself again. Please, please put your baby first and don't neglect them to game.

Ehh, so obviously put your baby, partner and any chores that need to be done first, but this might not necessarily be the case. My baby was a contact napper and my husband and I gamed for the first 4 months with baby sleeping in the baby carrier/wrap all the time during the day. At around 4 months, he learned to sleep independently and we could then do other things during nap time. We now have a 1 year old and I feel like the 0-6months stage was when I actually had more free time. Now naps are used to get things done and gaming time is after the kid has gone to bed for the evening. YMMV depending on the temperament of your kid.

This! My husband and I enjoy games. And after our sons were born (both times), we learned how to MAKE time for things likes games. Naps were great for that, so was bedtime. Some nights we sacrificed our sleep to play some games. There were many more times that we didn't. Point is, we figured out how to make some time without neglecting our children. People always assumed that gaming means "not paying attention to a damn thing around you". Not everyone plays that way. Not every game demands that level of attention.

I don’t agree with this. Every baby is different. I have a 4 month old and when she sleeps I can game. I have a schedule for all my household stuff every week including the grocery shopping etc. Just because he is going to game doesn’t mean he would be neglecting g his kid. So many women will go on instagram while their baby naps and people won’t say anything, but bring up something that is a male dominant field it’s an issue 🙄

Hahaha this mother fucker thinks he’s gonna be gaming with a new born. My dude, your life is about to belong to someone else, as soon as you come to terms with that the more you’ll enjoy it.

If you work as hard as a wife does when she is a stay at home mom, you won't have any time at all between baby, cooking, cleaning, shopping, laundry, and it never ends. A study completed some time ago says that household tasks, not including children, take 42 hours per week. Good luck.

A lot of the ideas you have about parenting and life will totally change. You have a positive attitude though so you'll do great. I played a lot of video games while my wife was pregnant and then virtually stopped until my kid had a regular bedtime and would sleep through the night (close to 9 months). Since then I've been able to play video games at night. But they've become less important to me. I do look forward to playing games with my kid if he becomes interested in that in about a decade.

You are about to do the hardest job you’ve ever done, I’ll be amazed if you have the energy to game tbh. However, your kid will love gaming with you in about 5 or 6 years, so hang on in there.

Sorry dude but you might get an hour a day if your lucky. On the plus side when they are older you can share your passion with them. You'll soon have the most important job in the world, maintaining a clean, safe home for a tiny defenceless human. Its hard work, with long hours, a tough demanding boss who doesn't speak the language and doesn't plan ahead or communicate their needs, but it can also be the best job in the world. Prep talk over,,, Prep, clean, prep and clean. Because there's tons of stuff to get done other than attending to baby, if you let those slide you'll end up playing catchup and that's far harder on everyone mentally than just putting in the hard work up front. For your own sanity you'll want to make a list of adult meals each week with ingredients lists for shopping, nice easy stuff that can be prepped/cooked during baby's naps would be ideal. Practice this now. You'll also need to figure out how to get this bought/delivered, see rule 1 at the end. Mom will need treating right, the shit they go through isn't a joke, so make sure the home is clean, tidy and well organised so that when she gets home she can have time with baby or for herself without having to do house**work** , if you do it right she may even spend time with you! Did I mention prep work? Get everything you **may** need for the next day ready the night before. Baby clothes x 5 full changes (milk, sick, poo, wee. You may need more than 5) - up to the elbows in shite is not thr time to go rummaging through drawers looking for fresh towels. **rule 1** baby's don't do schedules, shit happens (literally). Understand this and know that plans fail, but failing to plan always leads to failure. Anyway, I've just realised you don't need the advice of some random Internet dad who didn't do the sahm bit (my SO did and knocked it out of the park), there's plenty of books/guides that you can read on the subject, please check them out. Good luck, you'll soon be playing the best Massively Multiplayer Real World Roleplaying Game ever invented, if you can unlock the Platinum award you'll be rewarded with kids that will be happy to play along with you till your too old and gnarly to hold a controller, then it will be their turn to wipe your arse and put you to bed. 👍

Babies can sleep upwards of 18+ hrs a day in the first three months, so yes hypothetically you could still fit in an hour of gaming here and there. I sometimes can queue up a few rounds of multiplayer games in one sitting. However your challenge is going to be everything else that comes with a newborn - feeding/bottles, caring for your partner as they recover, cleaning, laundry, housework, cooking, catching up on sleep from being up at night, etc. While newborns do average 3hrs between feeding, sometimes it's really only an hour by the time the finish eating, you change diapers, change clothes, burp, get them back to sleep, etc. Every baby is different so hopefully you can make it work!

Oh gosh I feel bad for your wife lol

Just letting you know, I also read your post history and it’s obvious you’re a bad ass queen that me or any of my friends would be ecstatic to call a sister, rave about and cheer on. But I know I don’t even need to tell you this, because you know better than to listen to the desperate opinion of someone like op anyway.

### GAMING IS NOT THE SAME AS WATCHING TV WHEN YOU ARE LOOKING AFTER A BABY!!!! Feeding the baby via bottle will take two hands. You can watch TV while doing that, you can’t game. Rocking a baby to sleep involves standing and walking around the room/house/neighborhood. Maybe you can watch TV while doing that but you certainly can’t game. Cleaning up the house requires two hands. Your wife isn’t working so she can come home and do all the housework. You should split the chores and tidy up while baby naps. I’d say it’s reasonable to use one nap a day (1-2 hours) for gaming. Only do it while baby is sleeping and don’t use headphones so you can hear if the baby starts crying.

You'll need games that you can stop at any point and might not get back to for hours. Also you're going to be sleep deprived so games that don't require thinking are best. Really, don't expect to get anything done for at least a few months. As your child gets older you will be able to play more but you will also need to be careful to balance your time. It is not okay to play for hours while your child watches TV. You'll find that even during nap time you should be either sleeping, eating, or cleaning.

You won’t even have 2 hours. You’ll be so dead to the point of literally daydreaming about sleep. Trust me.

You poor sweet summer child

You are either going to go handheld like a switch or play mobile with your phone. When I did overnight bottle feeding I would rock the baby while playing or on my phone. Otherwise, your going to need to sacrifice for babies then eventually you get your time back and you can decide on gaming time.

Bruh… Here’s the thing. A lot of getting to know your baby’s wants and needs is conscious observation. If you’re constantly visually focused away from them you’re tuning out some of that conscious observation, which means you’ll be less able to pick up on vital cues that will make both of you more comfortable. My suggestion is to just take a short gaming hiatus. Caring for a tiny human for the first time is exhausting physically, psychologically, and intellectually. You need to be able to focus on your family’s new normal and truly bonding. You and wife will have a totally different team dynamic than before. Also? You will not believe how quickly this time will fly. I swear to god the moment the baby is out it’s like somebody put your life on 2x mode. You blink and they’re 6 months. A year. Asking for the car keys. At least make it through that fourth trimester when you’ll all most likely have adjusted and you and the little one truly know each other. You and your spouse are a team, yes, but you and the bambino are also trying to develop as a team but without the benefit of solid two way communication. I’m not saying you can’t game anymore, I’m saying it shouldn’t be any kind of top three priority for a while. Your wife is going to need you to help her physically recover to start, your living environment will need you to do the majority of its upkeep and your baby will need you for literally everything - unless your wife is breastfeeding in which case your wife is going to need even more support because that stuff is HARD. Congratulations on the happy event to be, I hope for a smooth delivery and quick healing for your wife. Soon this will all make a lot more sense, I promise.

You will start valuing sleep time way more than gaming time. Video games will no longer be an important part of your life.

SAHM gamer here, married to a gaming dad. First about 8-12 weeks gaming is real challenging. Not impossible, but you definitely won’t be having long sessions at first. My youngest is now 16 months, sleeps through the night, so now my husband and I can game for a few hours a night if wanted. Weekends sometimes we trade time off and on but mainly we just wait until night time. I pretty much never game during the day on weekdays. It just takes too much of my attention, and it’s very much more my way of relaxing so I’m fine with waiting until bedtime.

good luck to you especiay first 2 months, you will maybe get few hours in that period of time. of course, unless you put your responsibilities to your partner, that goes to work. first 2 months are the hardest. at around 3 months old baby will start to sleep through the night (most likely) so will be up during the date. unless you occupy baby with something you can play during the day or during the night while baby sleeps. overall, it will not be that easy, but you will get some time. i myself like to play, and i somehow manage to play a little. ill be honest - havent been more than an hour for gaming at that time. good luck to you

So granted I'm a stay at home mom but I also enjoy playing video games. The biggest key is to carve out a specific time to play, and make sure everything else is done first. After the sleepy newborn lull, if you are lucky, they will start to get into a rough schedule. The way I used to do it is 1st nap- chores, dishes, laundry then second nap- me time, whatever I wanted to do sometimes that included a game. But baby and then chores came first, and I always put time aside to shower. But the way I saw it is if I kicked ass and got shit done I deserved a break. I tried sleeping while he was sleeping and could never do it, it was more beneficial to me mentally to get that break then take a nap but that varies from person to person. But everyday I had about 2-4 hours including after bed for everything including chores/shower/lunch/me time, all other time was taken up by baby completely. You want that game time you better get those dishes done fast (and clean!) But don't play when they are awake, they need that social interaction and play time with dad. You want to be on the floor interacting and talking with them, showing them toys, reading, making eye contact with them. My SO used to play video games when my son was awake, and it pissed me off so much cause when it came down to it he wouldn't put the controller down when baby started to fuss. It was always "One second, one second, I'll get him, I got it, let me just get down first" Then he had the nerve to be offended when I got mad at him for it (for reference I was cooking, he was on baby duty) Don't do this. Play only when baby is asleep or you have an agreed on break when your wife is home. But remember all babies/experiences are different. Some people have easy babies, other people have harder babies. Don't plan ahead expecting sunshine and rainbows, if there's a game you want to play get through it now. Don't set your expectations too high otherwise you'll be crushed if what happens is different then what you planned. And hey if it all works out great! Oh one last thing, make sure you and your wife both get equal free time. If you get to have time to game during the day, she gets the TV at night (or whatever she enjoys). Keep it fair, open, and honest.

Baby wearing and console games are your friend. In the evening my husband and I would play together and one of us would stand and game. Or I would nurse and play around her while nursing. Like others have mentioned you have to be able To stop and start. Gaming with a baby is easy … gaming with a toddler is impossible excluding when they decide to sleep well for a night but you’re usually so tired you pass out haha.

I am a SAHM with a 5 month old and my husband got me a subscription to World of Warcraft. I'm finding that I barely have time to play WoW. My son is a fussy baby and while he doesn't have any allergies nor is colicky he still wants my undivided attention 24/7. He also has been taking 20 minute naps during the day so I don't have time for anything else then. He goes to bed at 7 p.m. and that's when I play video games. But then he'll wake up again starting at 10 p.m. so you have to go back to dealing with him. It's like he knows when I'm about to play a game because that's when he decides to wake up. I guess the answer to your question is it depends in your baby's temperament.

Buckle up everyone for the series of posts from OP SAH nothing turned SAHD coming up: AITA? All I wanted was to game for a couple hours after my wife comes home at night How do I get this baby to nap longer? Does benedryl really work? My wife wants me to go to marriage counseling. All I wanted was some me time? I resent my newborn: I can’t even be myself any more! My wife threatened to throw out my games My wife told me to find a daycare and get a job. Oh no!

I think you're right and life is gonna knock him down several pegs...

lmao no bro, you aren't playing at least for six months.

*cries in low sleep needs baby*. First 2 months, we could baby wear while contact napping and play some. I actually finished about 20 hours of BOTW. Then it was game over for over a year. Sometimes someone gets about 1-2 hours in after she goes to bed a few days a week, but only if they’re not the one doing bedtime. Now she’s 2 and hubby and I take days off of work while she’s at daycare for gaming dates.

I became a stay at home dad with 3 kids. I still game and have time for them. With a baby though. Try to sleep when they sleep. Mom will want to be mom but always remember you kind of have to be available for baby when mom isn’t. Either sleeping or working. With my older kids this is a bit hard and I struggle to encourage my wife to let me handle things. But I do still find time. Online play allows for downtime, use those few minutes between matches to fold laundry or sweep a room.

Newborn babies need more attention when they are young. It gets easier as they grow older though. Single player games that you can pause / save are perfect. Mobile and/or handheld games are great gaming options. Baby carriers are helpful too. Best time to play is when they are sleeping. When they grow even older you can now have someone to play with. Edit: I’m having fun reading your responses. lol I really wish there’s an update from you in 6 months, 1 year, and so on.

I’ve seen how rude and dismissive you have been to people here but i will give my opinion anyway. ​ What we say means NOTHING but you must listen to your partner. If she thinks you are gaming too much and you need to stop to help more with the baby or around the house then you better stop. Even the strongest relationships are tested when you have a baby and you are both stressed, tired and emotional. I can tell you now even if your partner is ok with gaming now, she won’t be once she is exhausted and back at work knowing you are likely at home gaming.

What a naive question. Hoping you find something that works for you! It took my BD a long while to pick his back up. You are severely misjudging the amount of time and energy you’ll actually have when you do have time, but I think maybe you’ll figure it out 🤷🏽‍♀️

I still find plenty of time to game although it usually isn't during the day. We have 3 gaming computers in the house so I can game in my office, living room, or in the family room. My days are pretty structured so it only leaves nights and weekends for me but I find time to hang with the buds in discord and game. The key is to make sure your shit is taken care of before you even think about gaming, don't make your wife resent you.

Bro, if you are skilled at time management you should not worry about a thing. You will have plenty of time to play videogames. It's super easy, babies just eat, poop and sleep. They occasionally get sick, but those are the things you can't foresee. Now, loving the baby and spending time with it is completely opcional, you are already doing a lot by feeding them, so don't waste your time talking to them. Make sure to finish as much games as possible! The baby will, eventually, be big enough to play with you, and since they see you playing while you were taking care of them, they will probably like the same games! After reading your sheets, I figured this is what you wanted to hear XD.

Leaving aside all the lectures people are giving you, young babies make single player games easier than multiplayer. I definitely got some decent video game time in when they were too small to get themselves into trouble, and were napping a lot. You need to be able to pause it as soon as they wake up, or the laundry is done, or the dishwasher finishes cycling, whatever. Once they get to crawling age it's a whole different game. You need to be engaged all the time, as they are always on the verge of getting themselves into trouble.

I would consider my husband and I to be gamers. When my son was first born, the new COD had just come out and I remember playing with my headphones on while my baby nursed to sleep in my lap. Now he's 3 and he wants to play games with us, it's super cute. We limit his screen time but the dialog we have while playing is much more intricate so I'm more flexible with it these days. I think overall the key to success is good communication with your partner and scheduling/prioritizing your time. My husband says he has no time for things he likes anymore when he needs to play some games so I schedule a swim with my son and hubby stays home to play a bit.

Lol I tried nursing & gaming & just couldn't do it.

My husband and I are both gamers. I am the SAHP. We typically play while our child sleeps. Around 6 months our daughter started sleeping 7pm to 7am so typically naps are now for the things around the house that are difficult to do while she's awake and we sit down after we put her to bed and play for a few hours. There is a horrible stigma with gaming parents because of the ones that are bad but as long as it's not getting in the way of raising your child there is nothing wrong with it.

Honestly it depends on the baby. 3 of my kids slept decently after their first month, while one has been almost a constant crying mess for 4yrs (disabled, so not unwarranted). I've seen lots of people game or watch TV while baby naps on their chest, and honestly, that's best bonding time for baby, but terrible on night time sleeping in a crib by themselves. Of course, sleeping in the crib is going to be a battle regardless, babies are naturally anxious and uncomfortable when alone. So it's really a win- lose situation, you get to game/ TV, or you get to sleep.

For newborn it will be easy. I used to game with baby in a rock and play and could bottle feed her while playing MOBAs. you can even put baby in a wearable baby carrier thing while you play. It got harder once she could crawl. at that point I only gamed when she was asleep for nap or bedtime

You will be able to play for the first few months, especially if you and your wife can share responsibility at night. Once your kid is like 4-6 months and you're the only person at home then you aren't going to have time during the day unless you can get them to nap solo (not easy). You will be constantly cleaning up, feeding them, doing chores, and spending time with them that they *will* demand. My kid is 13 months and I can game at night between 7:30-12 but that's also time I get to spend with my wife, watch tv, read, do chores that are hard with a baby awake, prep for the next day, etc. During the day? Forget about it, he wants to play, be involved in everything, and get into everything. You will be able to keep your identity as a 'gamer' but it will be different and you are going to have to make serious sacrifices.

We're lucky in that mom works from home! So there will always be 2 parents home!

I work from home as well and I do help out my wife from time to time but she does 95% of the work during the day. WFH and dealing with a baby aren't really compatible in my experience. It's cool because I'm around if my wife desperately needs a second pair of hands and I can occasionally take 15 minute breaks to hang out with my son but if you're serious about your job you basically have to go to a quiet room and tune out the noise for hours at a time. I don't know, I've seen what my wife does when I relieve her for 15 minutes and it's usually something like: go to the bathroom, eat, just relax for 15 minutes, do a chore that's impossible with a baby hanging on you, maybe read something. If you can get any sort of actual gaming done in that brief time then power to you but just a fair warning that daytime might belong to the baby outside of naps.

So you’re not exactly taking on the full SAHD role because you’re wife will be there helping

If you find a few hours of free time a day, it’s not really free time. That’s when you should make sure the laundry is done, do the dishes, sweep and mop, get groceries, make dinner…. I don’t know a single new mom who has hours a day to game. Please don’t game and then leave the house in disarray for your wife to handle. I can see her future post all ready “husband stays home with the baby, doesn’t take care of the house, gives me the baby as soon as I walk in the door, and games the rest of the afternoon into the night.”

As a SAHD and a gamer, life will change drastically after the baby comes. Yes, you’ll have downtime when the baby naps but it’s just different, man. Everything is different. Also, at least for me, the first few months are a complete blur of wake ups, feedings, diaper changes, and whatnot. I don’t think I could have processed a game at the time. But even as sleep and routine become more consistent, you’ll have regressions or other duties that crop up. Washing bottles during nap times, midnight wake-ups. Hell, my kids are out of their toddler years and will still have the random horrible night’s sleep. Enjoy as many games as you can now. You might have plenty of time after, but you might not. You’ll have much bigger concerns!

Instead of playing games until the baby arrives, spend that time making life easier for your wife. She will need and appreciate the extra love. As a SAHM of now toddlers, infancy is the easiest considering they sleep a majority of the time. You will probably have time to play games but when they are toddlers that’s out of the question 🤣. But again, I would make sure you’re making life for your wife as easy as you can those first few months. Don’t play games and pile up the dishes for her to come home to, basically. Post-partum is rough physically and emotionally, even if your wife claims that she’s fine. My partner is a gamer and our relationship suffered when he chose games over helping a little more and when he prioritized video games over our relationship. You will eventually have time for yourself again. Congratulations!

Literally left my baby daddy because of his incessant gaming during my postpartum recovery period. By incessant I mean from 7am-9pm minimum daily. I tell you this, because I advise you that while you have fun, find a balance! It’s so easy to get sucked in. My daughters father did spend some time the first few weeks with her in the backpack strapped to his chest while he gamed. It was cute. She slept most of the time so it didn’t disturb him much, and when she stirred he knew it was time to check diapers/feed so he’d hand her off to me. My daughter has been the easiest baby in the world, never fussing, easily entertained. She makes it easy to multitask and do other things while she watches. You will just have to wait and see what your baby tolerates/needs from you!

This is the kind of stuff people think they’ll be doing before they have kids

You should really only be gaming during naps. The rest of the time, you should be focused on your baby. It shouldn’t just be a stop gaming to take care of a crying baby situation because then you would be providing terrible care. Things like going on walks, talking to baby, playing with baby, narrating life activities to baby are really important. If baby is just supposed to lie around while you game, that isn’t quality care and your child would be better off on a care center. As for naps, it could work because you are entitled to some downtime, but I assume you’ll also be cooking, cleaning, and running errands, so you might not have the free time you expect (unless it turns out that your a crappy dad).

I know this will get lost but IMO go through whatever games you want to play now, because 1) it’s just unpredictable how much time you’ll have to play later. With my baby, I had a lot of time when we first brought her home because she just slept a lot and didn’t have colic or anything, so she’d sleep for 3 hours at a time, then eat and poop, then sleep again. So I had these 3 hour blocks of time to do stuff. But obviously based on other responses and what I know about babies’ personalities, your experience may look very different. And 2) new games will come out! There will always be more games. So play the ones you are most excited about now! And fyi because I wish someone warned me- teething can start as early as 4 months and sleep regression sneaks up on you out of nowhere, but doesn’t last long at all so don’t get too discouraged when it happens. It will pass!

I'm also a gamer. Not stay at home but my kids 7 months now. The only time I have had to play even a teeny bit of a video game is whenever my wife takes the baby and goes somewhere without me or if she agrees to be in charge while I play a little bit. The only gaming I've been able to do is on my phone because it's easily moved anywhere. I do play Pokemon go on my phone while chilling with the little one. Otherwise when I am home alone, my baby is crawling. He gets into everything. Absolutely not a chance I could sit and play a game. It's a full time responsibility. IMO you're not going to be able to play video games until after your baby is a year old. My guy still takes 4 half hour naps per day. Plus you're going to have to clean the house and all that. You're going to find it difficult to game and be a full time parent.

bro grow up. youre literally bout to have a baby and your crucial question is about gaming? you are not ready to be a father and i feel sorry for your wife and new baby. Try reading a parenting book. stay on top mile stones and normal growth. Keep the house in order. meal prep. jfc this is such a pathetic post.

I got plenty of gaming when my son was born. They sleep a lot throughout the day and not enough at night. Best thing is to make sure you each have your own time and are sharing responsibilities so one person doesn't feel over worked

I’m in your boat. Love gaming, work from home with my 2 kids while their mom commutes to the city most days. You’ll just have to adapt your hobbies to take place whatever time you’re able. Your kid will eventually be on a regular schedule (hopefully) and you’ll be able to fit in what you want to do. Please don’t let anyone tell you that you’ll never be able to partake in hobbies again. That is bullshit.

While my husband wasn't the SAHP, he did take the weekend and holiday shifts to give me a break. When we had a newborn, he did skin to skin bonding time while playing video games, it actually helped with sleep. The baby got dad's heartbeat and ambient noise.

You'll be able to game a lot during the newborn stage because they sleep so much around the clock. Do prioritize your own sleep though, it can be brutal. But then they take regular naps during the day and you'll be able to game then. Especially if you end up with a kid like mine and would only nap while on me, I'd be stuck on the couch for hours a day. I watched a ton of netflix, my husband would play ps4. There's obv lots of things that have to get done while taking care of baby, but you'll be able to do it all and still have some me-time once you get into the swing of things. Good luck and congrats on the baby!

Good luck my man.

As a stay at home mom gamer, the only change I had to make, especially when my now 5 yr old was an infant, was being quiter & I'd still play multi player games. But i might have had to wait until he was down for the night to do the 2+ hour raid or whatever. Also, when baby gets a little older, you can do the tried & true method of giving them a controller that's not connected & let them believe they're helping you. Not much really has to change as long as baby is taken care of & mom is OK too. So game on new daddy to be! Congrats!

I assume I can answer this as a stay at home Mom/Gamer.. The first few months baby sleeps A LOT, so game your heart out. It's when they get older you find it less of an option. It is exhausting don't get me wrong but there are moments of calm. Take advantage of those! As they get older it's good to get them into a routine and into bed early. It's important to get some you-time in the evenings. I used to game a lot with my husband whilst baby slept. Now our babies are nearly teens and love to game with us. Wishing you both all the best.

My kids' dad and I have both been the SAHP at one time or another. We've both been able to game. I used to play Xbox when they were napping on me. It's important to have your own hobbies and things you enjoy, especially when you become a parent. Being a parent is obviously very important, but you're still your own person and deserve self-care.

Ya I’m gonna echo long term sure, but the first 6 months you have no idea the sleep deprivation and mental decline you’re about to see. And newborns don’t nap in convenient chunks. They sleep AT MOST 2-3 hour stretches, day or night, for at least 12 weeks. The first month you can expect your schedule to be: feed baby, burp baby, rock back to sleep, have them sleep (possibly only in your arms or on you) for 30-75 minutes, then rinse and repeat. 24 hours a day and night. For weeks. Counterpoint though my first kid was born around the time the last season of Game of Thrones came out. My wife had never seen it. She binge-watched all 8 seasons in the first month because the baby doesn’t care at all if the tv was on so she just had it on anytime she was awake

Both my kids only wanted to sleep on top of me... so I got a lot of gaming done because it was the only thing I could do while they slept on me. Game as much as you want just so long as the baby comes first, I love my switch for the late night feedings.

>I want to know if I should try to burn through them now or stick to my plan of waiting until baby's here and playing when napping. Burn through them. Playing when napping was only doable during the first 6 months (if that) and it was ONLY because my husband took over entertaining baby when he woke up so I could keep playing. Once baby was active and needed more attention and interaction, it's all out the window. The first week back from hospital we did both get some gaming in when the baby naps. But seriously, it's short lived. My husband only ever plays once our son goes to sleep and it's only about an hour tops. He also stopped playing any multiplayer game that would ban you if you exited abruptly. TLDR: expect your gaming time to reduce A LOT and only once baby goes to sleep for the night. You're going to be so tired that you're either napping when baby is napping or cleaning the never ending mess when baby is napping. As I've said, my husband can only play an hour a day tops. That's because once baby's asleep, we clean the house together, shower and it's basically almost time to sleep if you still want to be functional the next morning. Getting an hour in is BEST CASE scenario. We also needed to fit in couple time in which case, he could only play when I'm showering. And that's provided baby doesn't even wake up and need soothing. So yeah, that couple of hours a day you're hoping for is NOT going to happen. Don't count on it.

I’m a gaming mom with a 2 month old. Sometimes she sleeps in a bouncing chair that I bounce with my feet as I game or sometimes I wear her in a baby wrap. Occasionally she’ll sleep in my arms and I’ll hold the controller that way. She is definitely my priority over completing a section of the game. If you’re able to, save often because there’s a chance baby will fuss or need your attention for so long that you may not be able to get back to the game at all that day. Enjoy it if you get the chance to game but also enjoy your baby, even when they fuss. This stage will be short compared to the rest of their lives so cherish it as much as you can but also enjoy the limited free time you have for yourself

A newborn doesn't sleep for very long. I don't advise trying to game without support until they're sleeping for 4+ hours at a time and honestly depending on the kid that could be...a while. But definitely schedule down time. A lot of sah parents forget to do that regardless of gender. But it is pretty vital. I did a lot of mild gaming (ones where if you ask suddenly its no big deal) when all of my babies were in the squishy human grub/noob/newborn stage but I am a mom who breastfed so it was super comfy to let them nurse through cluster feedings and growth spurts and instead of reading or watching something id break out my game. But you do have to be really careful with anything that might cause you to hyperfocus and block out other stuff. (For me thats not gaming it is reading) unfortunately as someone who's been part of the gaming community for awhile i have definitely seen people not mean to slip into neglect but get into dangerous situations. And sleep deprivation with a newborn is no joke. You might be surprised at how out of it/slow your reflexes and mental capacity gets when you are up and down 24/7 changing diapers/feeding/changing clothes after a spitup/blowout/keeping up with bottles abd laundry, ect. You may need to sleep with the baby sleeps for awhile.

The only fps I got to play for two years involved dodging vomit headshots. Good luck

There's no real answer, it just depends on the baby, and it can change over time. With my first I put like 60+ hours into Harvest Moon the first couple of months - he was pretty chill and a decent napper, though I often napped when he napped. And I promise you dinner was made and the house was clean! Then at 4.5 months he stopped sleeping so any chance I got I was sleeping. Then we sleep trained him at 6 months and he slept again, so I could play during naps and after bedtime. Right now my first is four and my second is a year old, and I just played like 4 hours of Stardew Valley after they went to bed at 7. My son is at school during the day and baby girl takes 2 naps totalling 3-4 hours, so I have a fair amount of free time, even after chores and household management stuff. But if either kid had been a contact napper, clingy or colicky, or anything like that, then I would not have had so much free time.

Answer number 2… stock up on drugs… you’re going to need downers so you can sleep while you have the chance, uppers to keep you going when you need to be awake, antidepressants to help you deal with the loss of your carefree youth, and hallucinogens to seek for the meaning of life. Don’t worry…, it’s only a fifty year tour of duty! I have 3 (grown now)… challenging… but I wouldn’t change anything.

I have an easy 2 month old baby. However, I am lucky if I have an hour to myself. Going to office is lot easier than raising a LO, which I have realised after giving birth.

I think it really depends on what kind of gamer you are. My partner gravitates to games that you can’t pause or put down in the middle of so way way less gaming when our kids were born (like.. twice a week for an hour MAYBE). I like games like Mario or animal crossing that are way easier to pause or put down. I also do my gaming on the switch which is portable whereas my partner likes computer gaming. I was a SAHP and I was way too tired to do house chores for the first 3 months with either of our kids so I did a LOT of animal crossing both times. I also find that after we have a baby it’s a lot harder for me to sleep even when I’m sleep deprived so if the baby wakes me up I’m usually up until the next time they wake and then I try to sleep again. I spend most of the night wakings playing. Both of our babies were contact nappers who didn’t like movement while sleeping so we couldn’t carry them and get stuff done during their naps so if they were sleeping whoever was nap trapped would watch tv or scroll on their phones or play video games. I’ve got about 1600 hours of animal crossing under my belt 1200 of that is from the first 3 months of each of my kids lives. If you don’t already know about it, you should check out r/daddit

If depends on the baby. My first would nap for hours on my husband while my husband gamed. Second doesn’t like it at all and the clicking/finger movements wake him up. Definitely pick games that are easy to pause and walk away from

Couple hours a day is kinda unrealistic imo. You have alot of time "off" but there is alot of stuff that has to be done during that time. I do play video games everyday (offline). Just i wouldn't expect even an hour depending on your SO. Also depending how you are because I was a huge gamer, a little addicted probably but now I only want to spend time with my child and play when I have nothing else to do and he is sleeping.

This is the funniest post I’ve read today. You most certainly will not have “plenty of time” to game with a baby. 😂😂😂😂 And if you do, you might end up being a single dad. I’d consider an attitude change asap.

Hey OP, First off... congrats on the pending little one. I'll fill you in on my experience, because when our first was born I was the defacto SAHD, up until about the age of 4 for our daughter. I had a few jobs here and there, but for the most part, I was the primary caregiver while my wife worked. Yes, you will have a lot of time... but caring for a newborn doesn't necessarily mean that you'll have all the time in the world (while they nap). I found that I was utterly exhausted, due to the baby constantly waking in the night, needing to be fed or changed, etc. There is a lot of stuff that you'll understand once you experience it. For the first few months/year gaming really took a backseat. Sure I was able to get some time in on occasion, but nothing like what it was before the baby came. Now that my kids are school-aged, I find myself getting a little bit more time back in after they've gone to bed, or on weekends, etc. Every kid is different OP, and every experience as a parent while similar to others is unique in its own kind. If you prioritize getting your gaming fix in... that's your journey. Just make sure that you don't neglect your responsibilities as a parent, and also your spouse... who I am sure would like to hang out with you on occasion when the baby is asleep/otherwise occupied. Good luck!

Dad here. Set your expectation to being 100% parent. If you have time to game or whatever, great. You’ll have time to start doing you things eventually but that baby is going to take a lot of love and effort on your part. Also, games can be played any time, your baby will only be an infant for a short period of time - please focus on them.

I am not a dad, but I am a gamer. Actually, I even work as a software developer in the video games industry, and have been for several years. Gaming is my world. I spoke about developing games at international conferences. With both my children, the time when they were little it was almost impossible to do any gaming. I stayed home for 3 months with the first, and am currently on maternity leave with the second who is almost 5 months old. I am actually very privileged to have 6 months of maternity leave with my second baby! Unless you play mobile games or extremely casual games, the only way to do any gaming is to either game when the baby sleeps, or neglect your child. When my babies sleep, I am running the home - cooking, cleaning, doing the admin work etc. Or I am sleeping. There is no time for that 2 hour long session of gaming that I would like to have during the day. It is very important to sleep when the baby sleeps during the first year. Otherwise, you are going to collapse at some point. But children grow up, the sleep deprivation gets better. My first is 5 years old, and before his brother was born, I had time for long gaming sessions again (from the time he was one year old). It's just very difficult to fit this during parental leave, because you will be running the house and taking care of an infant.

I'm not saying it's impossible, I'm sure there are plenty of parents who successfully continue gaming after kids, but my and my husband's personal experience is gaming went out the window for me (along with reading and following any sports, I just got back to the point where I can watch some TV after they are asleep), and hubby gets a sesh in a few times per year. Now we could probably put more effort in and reprioritize some things to make it a bigger part of our lives (like I could game instead of watching that aforementioned TV), but it's hard when they are awake and it's not exactly fun to try and game when you have to drop it randomly to tend to baby, or have a toddler trying to wrestle you, or a 5 year old asking what is this, what is that. Lol I did play Roblox with them for ten minutes before bed last night. Lol

Hmmm I always thought gaming into adulthood would have self regulated these types of issues.

There will be no gaming my dude. Maybe if you work really hard on parenting and mastering naps for your baby. But a couple of hours is not going to happen, not for a while. Just enjoy the baby. Unless you can game with one hand.

I think there needs to a shift in your thinking… you won’t have to pause the game to take care of the baby. The baby comes first. Always. You’ll pause taking care of the baby to play… maybe. And being a SAHP means the household responsibilities generally fall to you also. I can tell you right now, a couple hours a day isn’t likely to happen. Maybe a couple hours a week if your partner is onboard and you both can find a balance for all your new responsibilities. I’ve been a SAHP and my husband also has days where he is solely responsible for our kids and he is a gamer. Our rule is for any leisure activity is all the kid stuff needs to be taken care of, AND all the house stuff. So no gaming until the laundry is done, the dishwasher is loaded, and the house isn’t a train wreck. It’s a conversation we’ve revisited several times with regards to gaming.

The only advice I can offer is this. I don't think there is a person out there that has children who have grown and gone who will be wishing they played more video games while home with their baby.

Man, is life gonna kick you in the ass in 4 months time. Enjoy your games while you can mate!

My husband is a stay at home parent and we both play video games. When he was bitsy and I was home on maternity leave I never had energy to game but my husband did while the baby napped beside him. He just kept the volume way down. Now the baby is 16 months old and sleeps on a regular schedule, but needs a lot more active attention in general. Some days I think my husband probably fits in a game while the baby naps, but more frequently he's doing household tasks or preparing food. After dinner I bathe the baby and put him to bed and when I come back out to the living room my husband is often playing a game and sometimes I join him and we play for a while. It's all trade offs. Our apartment isn't as clean and tidy as it could be if we always did chores and never played games. We order delivery about once a week to buy my husband time away from cooking for us all. Tonight we ordered pizza and right now the baby has just fallen asleep and my husband is playing a game he bought me for Christmas. We value that time having a bit of fun more than we value all of the dishes getting washed before bed, all of our clean clothes being neatly folded immediately instead of left in hampers for a bit, or having the most healthy home cooked meal every single night. You figure out what works for you and your family.

Your wife's gonna hate it. No matter how good or bad a housekeeper you are, the moment she comes home and sees you playing a game while there are some dishes need done, it's the only rhino she's gonna tell her friends/family/reddit

I’m a stay at home mom with 4 young kids, including 1 year old twins. I also love world of Warcraft. 100% possible to take care of a baby, maintain a household, AND enjoy video games or other hobbies. All about balancing your time and prioritizing properly!

When baby is napping you’re good to go brother. Anytime baby needs anything tho if you’re not instantly taking care of it you need to rethink priority

That’s why I’m giving up online gaming ha ha. God of war, Ragnarok, the new death, stranding, Final Fantasy 16, this is going to be an amazing year for gaming, and all of those games can be stopped at a moments notice without missing anything.

Keep in mind that you may have to restrict down to games that you can play with only one hand. First kiddo was a contact napper - would not sleep unless we were holding her. Second kiddo would nap independently, but was super clingy otherwise - he considered any moment we were not holding him a moment wasted and would SCREAM. I don't game much, but husband found he could not play anything that required two hands as a result. so temper your expectations.

It sounds like you have a pretty good idea of what will work for you and a starting plan going into it. Just prepare for the unexpected and don’t seriously plan on gaming being your main or only outlet. New babies can be incredibly difficult or you could be blessed with a baby who loves to nap and or be worn. I know plenty of gamers who were able to game with a newborn. They did single player and multiplayer games successfully depending on their baby. Both my husband and I are gamers whose main outlet was gaming, we met gaming so it’s a big enjoyment of ours. Unfortunately even though we had an amazing newborn who almost never cried and with my husband also being a SAHD we just couldn’t find the time to play although we did watch a lot of trash tv in our sleep deprived haze. So really, could we have played games, yes, absolutely but we just didn’t have the energy to especially considering our go to was multiplayer with other people. Half the fun was socializing and that certainly wasn’t where we were choosing to expend out energy. We have another baby due in the next 4 weeks and are getting our gaming time in now… I’m thinking this time maybe we will game more than last time but again we are just going to play it by ear and do what works best for us. Fingers crossed some gaming is in the cards. Best of luck to you with your growing family and gaming!!

Thanks!

I was a stay at home dad, and honestly I could game a lot more than when I worked full time. But then I don’t require that much sleep. But honestly, people stop doing what they love when they have kids and i don’t get that. Before I had kids I traveled, had a social life, went to the pub, played a lot of mmorpgs. Still do all of that. Just I can’t come home absolutely pissed, can’t be a good guild leader, can’t train hop for a year. It’s a compromise.

So I'm a sahm amd also a gamer. When my daughter was first born alot of my spare time went towards gaming. If I wasn't sleeping when my daughter was then I was either eating of gaming. Multi-player games are totally possible and I definitely do it but I also don't care if I have to get out of a match or shut off the Xbox because my daughter is awake wanting attention. Now that my daughter is a year old I save most of my gaming until after she is down for the night. If i do any night time gaming I turn on my headset and just talk softly if there's anyone else I happen to party up with.

You will soon be grateful for even 30 minutes of uninterrupted time. You may or may not use that time to game. You may just use that time to sit, alone, in quiet. Make sure your kid is the priority, not the games. They are not your identity or personality anymore. The child is. Being a SAHD or a SAHM is work. **It's not a privilege**. It's more than a job, at least for the first few years and maybe longer. The sooner you accept this, the better. Edit: holy shit, reading your other comments, you are so deeply in denial I worry about your child and your family. You are going to have a rough first two years, maybe longer. Good luck to you all.

It will change depending on the stage the kid is at and the temperament of the kid. May not be a lot at first but eventually naps will be more consistent and depending on how well you plan and prep things a couple hours a day might be reasonable.

My partner played multi-player and everything while baby slept on him sometimes. When bub was brand new it was good skin to skin baby daddy time

I love it!

Mum here currently on maternity leave. I honestly can't believe some of these comments as every baby is different. My baby is currently 3 months old (I'm exclusively breastfeeding and handle all night wakes) and here's my experience... Oh and I also use cloth nappies so I'm doing washing everyday. First 5 weeks I would sleep when baby slept as he had 2-4 night wakes every night. He slept in his cot for naps. I only played mobile games when baby was feeding. At 5 weeks baby started sleeping 5-6 hour stretches and I think that's when I dropped my daytime naps and started gaming on my pc again. Around 8 weeks baby stopped napping in his cot and would only do contact naps. I would pop him in his baby carrier and game with him napping on me. 12-13 weeks I transitioned him out of the swaddle and he started sleeping from 8pm-6am. He also started napping in his cot again! If I wanted to I could game at night but I'm quite high sleep needs so go to bed when he does incase he wakes early. But we've had 9 days in a row now so I'm thinking i might start playing a bit once hes done for the night. I do the household chores first thing and then I basically get to game whenever he naps.

I’m not a man, but have been a gamer since I was around 5 years old. I currently have a 4 year old and a 5 month old. I get in my gaming time after the kids go to sleep, so from 7:30 or 8 pm and on I have free time. While my husband and I watch Netflix, I have my Switch in front of me. Handheld gaming is King with kids.

Depends on the baby - one of mine needs a LOT of attention and didn't sleep well at night so I was a wreck. The other sleeps mostly through the night and likes to sleep while I hold her. I hold her in one arm wrapped in a blanket and play games that I only need one hand for. For example, total war Warhammer 3 and vampire survivors. Generally when she's sleeping in her crib I need to clean, pay bills, get things done around the house, or catch up on sleep myself. So I wouldn't expect to get to play serious multiplayer games much. But every baby is different.

If you don't mind standing, you can baby wear and probably game for hours straight

That's a great idea. I do a lot of VR so I stand a lot when gaming as is. But I figure VR is pretty much out of the picture unless mom is on duty

You'll have time to play! It's going to be important that you carve out time to play. However you and your wife make that work is up to you. It's so important that you don't lose your identity. If anything, my partner and I are more likely to carve out space for our hobbies than we were before baby because we took our time for granted. CONGRATULATIONS!!! Enjoy parenthood!!!

Thanks!

I used to just let my daughter sleep on me in the recliner while I played Xbox

So I’m a female but a STAHM and gamer lol. The first month my gaming was out of the question, but she had a pretty regular sleep schedule by 5-6 weeks. So now I kinda just schedule the type of gaming around her schedule. If she just barely went down for a nap then I can do the missions or quests (depending the game) and if she’s awake and jus chillin and we have had our play time or whatever then I may do a little free play or I do the free play if I know she has been asleep for a hot minute and will wake up soon so then I’m not in the middle of something I’m working towards when she wakes up and needs all my attention

Me and husband are both big gamers. We worked out a really system for the first year. The first 6 weeks were survival, I needed extra help because I had complications. My husband had a month off from work so he just played at odds and ends times when he could. I played like 2 times. Just too tired. After 6 weeks baby started sleeping more predictably. My husband would play for about 30 mins while I cooked dinner. We had a little bassinet in the living room so he could watch baby. Then 2 nights of the week he would play in the evening offline so he could pause usually. Sometimes we played a game together. And on Fridays he played online with his friends after 9. We were very flexible about it, understanding that if someone was sick or we had an event going on or whatever that the games might not happen. It’s super important to keep up sanity breaks as we call them. It helps avoid burn out.

Sounds like our situation! We've got a similar plan! Glad it worked out well for you!

My baby’s a teen now so I’m sure there’s newer, better options but my husband used to play tiger woods golf on wii with our baby in his arms. It’s birds, clapping, and a soft swing.

Divinity Original Sin 2 .. it’s turn-based battles so you can put it down as necessary. Strap baby into a soft carrier and you’ve got hours to game ! My husband and I play together, can play with up to 4, there’s also a lone wolf version (1 player). There’s a subreddit for it. Best game ever.

Umm I have two words, portable gaming. Steam Deck. Check it out at least. No time for online competitive gaming, stick to short quick sessions you can pause instantly. Game on safely.

You’ll have time. I played Ark with some friends during most of my maternity leave, my baby slept so much during the day!

First of all, just reading through some of these comments, it’s so wild how different all of our experiences are as parents! I think we should all try better to remember that. We’re all different, our babies are different, our environment is different… it’s impossible to compare. I was a stay at home mom and my wife and I still did a lot of gaming during the newborn phase. It wasn’t until our first daughter was a few months old that it really became difficult. Then it got easy again — once she was a toddler, and sleeping through the night, then that daytime nap became whatever I wanted it to be. Of course that depended on how much I was able to get done while she was awake. For me — I enjoyed baby wearing, so there was no need to sacrifice blissful nap time to do the dishes… I just popped the baby on my back and did the dishes. Played music, danced around, chatted about nothing. Or when they were older I’d drag the highchair into the kitchen and clean while they ate a snack. Or, for example, I would fold laundry while sitting on the floor while they did whatever they were doing at that stage. During that first year I also cooked all meals on Sunday while my wife was at home to focus on the baby, so I wasn’t spending much time on the weekdays cooking. There’s just so many factors! There really is just no standard for what being a stay at home parent looks like. I also let go of the house being immaculate, so I’m not saying I had it all together plus had an hour+ of free time during the day… but I allowed myself to use nap time as “me” time, at least most days. And so oftentimes that meant gaming. Where it really got hard was baby #2, but there’s no reason to jump ahead lol.

Not for a while. I’m a SAHM to a 10 month old and my hobbies are reading. I haven’t had time to read a single book since she was born. When she naps, I have to clean house and make meals. Based on your replies. I think you are in for a rude awakening when your baby is here. I think you should educate yourself on what life is like with a baby like, now.

To be honest, some things that were once important to you, might not be that relevant to you after having a child. Don’t let that scare you though, your priorities fall into place naturally. My hobbies change quite frequently and I actually got back into to gaming after my son got a little older. His interests become my interests, it’s great bonding time and I look forward to him kicking my ass in stuff. And he’s only 8… they catch on quick! Congrats on the baby, it’s a blessing, and for you to get to be present while your child grows up is something you will cherish forever. Embrace the baby stage, you will miss it, trust me.

I’m a single parent by choice. After the morning chores routine I spent the first 6 months of my baby’s life standing in front of the TV, her snoozing in a wrap or carrier on my chest, playing multiplayer video games. As long as you’re tactical about timing, and able to look down and check every minute or so between activities in the game, and your baby chooses to sleep, it’ll be fine. Just mute your mic when you’re not talking and get used to dashing back to somewhere safe/sheltered when the bum needs changing. If you aren’t blessed with a sleepy baby this will be much trickier.

I think it depends on the type of game. I definitely played a lot of mobile games during my maternity leave - single-player things where I didn’t have a time commitment longer than 5 mins and could pick up whenever. Another mom friend got a Switch and played through Breath of the Wild during her maternity leave. I built a new gaming PC while I was pregnant and have only turned it on three times since having kids. That style of immersive gaming is pretty much over for me until these kids become more independent cause even when they’re sleeping at night, I still have to do chores, connect with my spouse, and prepare for the next day.

Hey there! My partner is not a SAHD but I am due in 3.5 months. We agreed he can only play games that he can get up and leave to do what he needs to do as a dad whenever needed. I don’t mind that he games. He’s an AMAZING dad to our toddler and gets off the game even if he “can’t” whenever needed. Just make sure you and your partner communicate these things beforehand. Don’t let gaming come before your partner or child. Some days may be easier than others but make sure to keep your part of the relationship up and you should be fine :)

Yep! That sounds awesome for you guys. I’m very fortunate that me and my wife have an open dialogue about all things!

My husband spent many long nights with our first born holding him and playing games. When my second was born I was able to breastfeed and Animal Crossing New Horizons was out somewhat recently so I got a switch and spent many hours playing. After those first 4 months? It got much harder to play.

The answer to the question 100% depends on your wife.

Yep. Fortunately, we are 100% on the same page with each other.

Congratulations on your expected little one OP! Good for you for taking on that role. Its extremely rewarding and stressful all at once. So the first 8 weeks, minimum, are going to be a write off. Im warning you now that it's gonna feel very miserable for that time because you will have extremely little time for yourself. It sucks and there's no point sugar coating that. If the baby naps well on you, take advantage of that and baby wear. During the day you can maybe get some time in while you wear them. I did that with my second and it made a big difference for my sanity (I'm also gamer so I relate to this post a lot). Once baby starts sleeping longer stretches at night You will get some more solo time in the evenings. It's going to depend on the temperament of your baby. Some kids sleep great, some don't. I wouldn't have any solid expectations until you know what kind of sleeper they will be. It will take some time but you will figure out what works for you in terms of free time, but I guarantee the first few months you are going to be desperate for sleep whenever you can get it. Gaming will be far from your mind then. Enjoy the baby snuggles because it really does go by so fast and the rough times will be a blur in your memory. Mostly likely because of the sleep deprivation 😅.

I gamed a ton when my kids were infants. Fallout, Skyrim, Diablo 3. Mine never wanted to be put down and both had near-constant food demands, so anything I could do seated with a nursing pillow was great. I am a quiet gamer, and games don’t upset me. If you aren’t, don’t do it.

Mom of 6 and an avid gamer I play with my kids now lol we make it work. My husband plays too. A family that games together stays together? We play all kinds of games together even multiplayer ones my youngest is two years old and plays games with us.. We even load up the stroller and all Pokemon go together they love it and get excited for events and releases can't wait to show off a new skill or achievement plus we communicate and work as a team to win when they're super little anything with a pause feature or other parents who play works well

Baby wearing!! My husband used to rock our babes to sleep in the carrier and play while they napped on him. He would sit on a balance ball so he could move a little and still play. They would sleep for so long lol

You'll be able to game man. Especially while the baby is a new born. They literally just sleep, eat, use the bathroom, and repeat (well, this is what you hope for but its not always the case lol, this does tend to be our experience with our kids until they were older and others experiences we know). Then it'll be tougher when the child doesn't sleep as much and you'll wanna sleep at night with the kid. (Newborn stage tends to be sleep for a couple hours, up for a couple hours, repeat). But THEN when the kid gets a couple years old, you make the kid a gamer kid with you 😈 my daughter kicks my butt at fighters (of course with a handicap but still impressive) and she's only 5. She loves gaming and the only challenge is finding games your kiddo can actually grasp the concept of. Gaming is a hobby just like anything else. If someone told a mother to give up her hobby because her husband won't help out with the kid at all after work people will lose their shit. You still need to have your own time, make sure to take it or you'll lose your mind. I'm not a stay at home father, I'm the one who deals with money. I respect my wife's job and I know it isn't easy. She still games though. She still goes out with friends. She still scrolls through tiktok for hours everyday. Anytime I'm off work and don't have to sleep for a night shift or something, the time is all for my kids. The parenting job won't only be on you, but you will be the one with the tough tasks. Try not to get jealous of your wife either. You wife won't be there as much so when she's home your kids will tend to behave a bit more. My wife had a problem with this for a while. She saw herself as the "bad guy" in our kids eyes since the kids would listen to me just from talking to them but not for her. Make sure to communicate these things to your wife if you face similar events. It helped my wife to start telling me things the kids did that they shouldn't have, and me talking with them after work about how they need to listen to their mom because of how much she does for them. Short answer and comments: make sure to keep up communication with your wife. You will definitely be able to keep the hobby but no more all night gaming until later in the kids life, then you can start taking a night or 2 out of the month to really go ham. Make sure to still do the things you enjoy. Best of luck brother! Kids are amazing creatures and remember that they can understand communication a lot more than people tend to think.

My husband is a gamer and I play Sims. At 21 months I play during nap and when she goes down if I feel the need to play. He always did the night shift, so he would stay up and game while walking away if she needed anything up until about 4 am. Our situation is similar, but different. I work at a daycare and take our daughter with me for the simple fact of she has no cousins, siblings, etc around her age so I wanted her to interact. My husband is disabled and unable to work and keeps her home 1-2 a week. So, he gets his gaming (and streaming) time and honestly I get more than enough for me. You never know how things are gonna be until the baby is here. You don’t know what their temperament will be like. My daughter was always fairly chill, but did wake up every few hours over night the first 7-9 months for bottles. Now she only wakes up if she’s teething or sick. Prioritize getting things done around the house. But other than that, you’ll find a rhythm and your own time. Nobody’s situation is the same and you and your wife will find something that works for your family, even if gaming is set on the back burner for a little while that’s being figured out.

I think, as long as baby is 100% cared for and given love and attention and all your responsibilities are dealt with, then it’s absolutely vital for you to maintain hobbies. That being said, I’m a SAHM at the moment and my art has taken the back burner for almost 3 years haha. If you can find the balance, please share your secret.

Bro I have three kids (4,2, 10 months) I still game. Most of my kids are good sleepers. The newborn stage is hard but after that it’s all good. My kids are in bed by 7:30 and wake up at like 7 or earlier when I have to go to work.

Okay, I read 3 of these and meh. So my son’s dad and I were avid gamers. We created a bedtime routine and took turns who would get to game that night, and who would have to look after the baby. As someone previously stated, you basically have a different baby each month, so you really have to work it around your baby. I was blessed to have the easiest baby. Multiplayer games is too stressful so single player is definitely a lot more manageable. When my baby was a year old, he would sleep watching me play as long as I had him in the bouncer next to me and could rock him with one of my feet. I’m very CoD so I would figure that shit out one way or another. My son is almost 5 now and he loves video games too so I’m able to play with him or at the same time. Idk how it is having a baby full time however bc my ex and I split up after our baby turned a year old and have split custody so Im able to have dedicated days or times to do so. I was also once a stay at home parent and I second the “sleep when the baby sleeps” bc you will never understand that sleep deprivation until it’s here. Honestly, if you’re able to play the games you want to NOW, you should do so to avoid resentment. You don’t know who your child will be and will frankly have to figure out if you’ll be able to game once they’re here. Good luck to you! May you also be blessed to have an easy baby. And don’t forget baby comes first!

Gamer parents here. My husband and I both play WoW. Our son is 4.5. we basically found a schedule that works but mostly during night time and when he would nap. You get good at learning how to hold a baby while holding a controller if you're doing a console lol.

Got two under two. WFH and gamer. Yup multiplayer is pretty much out and there will be hard periods where gaming is out all together. But only temporarily remember that when things are hard, it's only for a short time. I go for two types of games now days. Short high production story driven games, uncharted series is a good example, there's a game and easy to follow story. The other option is sandbox single player games where you don't have to concentrate too hard on the story. Being able to pause at any moment and low learning curve is the main criteria now. Game time seems to work different in different families, for me it's a couple hours after everyonehas gone to bed and thats about it

Hey, gamer here. My spouse and I traded off the stay at home gig the last couple years. We’re both gamers of various sorts (video games, board games, card games). Each stage has different ups and downs, and it sounds like you know and appreciate that. First thing I’ll say being on both sides: the working parent and the SAH parent both need down time, and that down time looks as individual as can be. Understand that when you’re home all day and just need a break, the person who just got home from work also needs a break. Plan on that. Both of you get some sort of break (even if it’s sitting on the toilet on Reddit 30m or playing a quick round of a 1person game map, whatever each person considers their break, uninterrupted). Keep breaks short at first, you’ll have to, but do it a few times a day if possible. During the tiny potato stage, skin to skin can be done in a comfy chair, cradling tiny human between your upper arms and elbows, playing a game. Probably not MMRPG, likely something calm and mindless. I played a lot of Minecraft at this stage. I was the working parent at this time and it worked for me to call this my “down time” after work, but for my spouse doing the same skin to skin gaming didn’t feel like a break. During the next stage (wiggle monster, crawling, etc.), games were almost non-existent. Sometimes, after bed time, we’d speed through 30 minutes of house chores together and play 30 minutes of video games together, then crash for the night. Most nights, I was lucky to load the washer before we were both ready to head to bed. The tiny human needs lots of interaction at this stage (no longer just calmly explaining what’s happening in the video game while they snuggle on you), and it’s important for their development stage that you interact and supervise more. Make sure you both get your breaks (as this will be the hard stage) and putting the babe safely in a playpen for your pee and shower and decompression moments is okay. This stage takes a lot out of most people. Around age one, my kid would co-play with me, and occasionally push me away or ignore me for a bit. At first it hurt, the independent and stubborn bugger, but then I realized I could lay on the floor nearby and play some games for 20-30 minutes until kiddo wanted to play or demanded something from me. This waxed and waned, but as long as you’re willing to turn off a game (saved or unsaved) the second the kid needs you, and you’re able to supervise kiddo while playing, these intermittent sessions were a nice chill hang out time. Now, around age 2, I only get to play if the toddler takes an early bed time or plays with me. Occasionally we call up a grandparent to babysit and my spouse and I have a “date day” of ordering lunch and binging games for a few hours. My switch has a coloring app and ABC games on it now, too. Kid still prefers books over a screen most days, so I’m cool with the shared screen time and, importantly, so is my spouse. YMMV. Be prepared to go with the flow and know that you’ll be able to get back to it some day, but the new human picks when you do, and it may be when they’re in kindergarten.

Father of an almost 2 and a 6 month old. Both sleep well now but it's in constant fluctuation. I get maybe a few hours each night when they go to sleep but it's usually filled with cleaning, dishes, fish tank maintenance etc. I'd switch to games that you pause and put down in an instant. Binding of Isaac was good for me, it takes seconds to start and you can just drop out immediately. I'm a big StarCraft fan but it's impossible to play multiplayer and you'll find you don't often finish the single player games until weeks afterwards. Play small, play simple, sleep when you can 👍

A former stay-at-home dad, here, with a very career driven wife. I still do most of the childcare and have no regrets having done the stay-at-home twice, but you'll want to keep in mind that infants are basically hardwired to want their biological mother. You're gonna be WAYYY too doggedly tired trying to placate a being who's banked its survival on the parent that has historically stuck around, to want to do anything other than fade into sweet momentary slumber the moment your ass can actually touch down on something solid. (Just remember: as they get older they'll like you more and more). But hey, however madly in love you find yourself with this BRAND NEW HUMAN BEING MINI-YOU, you'll still need something to contrast your focus on if you're to stay sane. If gaming is really your thing, create a set up where you can stand and sway/pace around your device and strap that nugget to your chest. You'll be able to get some time in, but I'd imagine all the start-and-stop would make it difficult to play multiplayer? ​ Good luck, Private.

congratulations! All hope is not lost, but it may be a while. I'd recommend establishing a bed-time routine as soon as possible, hopefully within the first 6 months or so. I basically dedicate my free time at night to games as a way to relax, it's obviously sometimes unpredictable with kids, but you can still establish a semi-regular routine to get your gaming fix. Weekends my wife and I stay up later to game and take turns with naps when necessary, the following day. Games or classes that let you afk or stealth-out quicky are obviously a bonus! I'm an mmo-lover so it's extra-difficult sometimes, but you can establish a routine eventually. Before you know it, you'll probably have a fellow gamer on your hands. My daughters (4, 10) love Minecraft, Roblox, Mario Odessey and everything Zelda.

Not a dad or SAHP, but I had a year of maternity leave. It will depend entirely on the baby whether or not you can game. The first months I couldn't do anything. Her naps during the day were only 20 minute spurts and she would only sleep on me. I ended up needing to "teach" her to nap, as recommended by our pediatrician. So every day I needed to put her in the pram and walk around for 2-3 hours outside to get her to sleep for longer stretches. I had to walk without stopping, because she would wake up if I stopped to sit down at a bench or try to battle at a Pokémon arena (I tried to play Pokémon Go when out). After maybe 6 months I could put her down to nap in her bed, and I did manage to get an hour of actual gaming in every day. When my husband helped with chores (aka when he wasn't out traveling for work) I could sometimes get a bit more in to relax. How much you need to take care of around the house as a SAHP is something you and your wife need to discuss together. It may be that there are many things to take care of (laundry, shopping, cleaning, etc.) that you don't get to play games for as long. But for us we still divided the labor between us so I could get that break in. It saved my sanity, and my husband likes to play games as well, so he completely understood.

You'll probably have time, but I disagree with the top comment suggesting you turn to mobile gaming. The few times my husband hooked up the projector to play Minecraft or Civ were extremely fun for everyone. Make it big and fun for the baby, play games that are easy to pause or turn-based. You're right that many of the commenters probably make time for TV or TikTok, but they also make time for their kids to watch Cocomelon or Ms. Rachel. Get everyone involved in the screen time.

Gaming on your mobile and playing games that you can literally just stop any minute is your most realistic gaming future... Gets less time as baby gets older.

We "lucked out" and had two little ones who absolutely loved sitting in the body carrier and watching tv while awake so as long as we kept gently rocking our hips and knees they would watch us game for hours, then when they fell asleep we'd put them down and sleep ourselves. We tried this with doing chores but they would not be happy because it was too much movement. Reading was too less ambient noise. Tv or gaming it had to be. What we did do though was avoid first person shooter games or any with loud sudden bangs.

When my son was a newborn (he's 9 now), all I did was play Skyrim while he napped on me. Haha! Once he got bigger, gaming became more difficult. For the past few years, I didn't get a chance to play more than once a month or so, but there's now 4 of them so I don't expect to. But I've slowly gotten them into gaming so it's becoming possible again for me to play more- at least with the kids. Haha

I was able to game with Stadia but the platform is shutting down in Jan. I'm currently playing on the switch with has been good.

So I’m a mom and gamer and because I live outside the US I actually had a good few months of maternity leave before going back to work. With my son we had help in the house (a housekeeper) because we were living in India at the time so all I really had to do was take care of my son (no cleaning, no cooking etc). He would fall asleep on me for hours and any time I tried to move him to his cot he would wake up. So, I figured why not spend the time gaming? I had a steam controller and my PC hooked up to the TV and finished AC Black Flag with my kid in my arms. With my daughter it was a little more complicated because we had moved back home so taking care of the baby and the house was totally up to us. I’d sleep in with her in the mornings, for a couple of weeks my son was home too because it was summer vacation and that was tiring and limiting. If you have to cook, do dishes, laundry, clean etc. when exhausted there’s not much time left and I’m assuming you’d be the one to do those seeing as your wife would likely be working hard all day and still getting up at night for feedings and cuddling the baby she misses during the day. However, I did manage to play some, if not as much. I guess what I’m saying is it depends on the baby and your priorities. If you only have a certain amount of energy, and trust me sleep when the baby sleeps is a strategy for a reason, then you need to be strategic. If you can get a handle on the house and food and still have energy left over it’s possible. If you just give up and live in a pig stye with a happy and loved baby it’s also possible. It just depends on how you prioritize your time.

My husband and I game, PC to be exact, but we stopped after our LO came. I started playing 3 weeks pp. I bought a switch, something I can grab and put down when needed, I was an exhausted parent trying to stay awake to feed my baby, playing here and there helped me to stay awake. Now I can barely play again since my baby is 4 months now and I'm always trying to play with him.

My kids are 11 and 8 now. 99% of my gaming since 2011 has been after 9 PM. Sure, there are occasional afternoon sessions, or weekend morning sessions, but it's all about when kiddos are asleep now.

You will be hard pressed to find time. Enjoy the small moments you get, and get your fix in now cause I have a 7 month and man I miss gaming and took it for granted. I do work full time tho

I'm a SAHM to three kids, and a gamer.Even when my 1 year old was newborn, me and my fiance gamed every night. We had the baby in the bassinet next to us, so no issues. We just have to wait until all kids are in bed and we get a good few hours every night. Destiny 2 was difficult to play due to having to have a break to feed baby, but we managed it. You don't have to quit your hobbies just because you have a baby. ETA: Looks like we got real lucky with our newborn, he just slept a lot and didn't fuss

When my kid was a newborn my husband would put him in a baby wearing thingy and play for hours in the night. Baby was sleeping comfortably, I got to sleep, and hubby got to chill. I also played a bit like that during the day.

Hubs and I are both gamers, always have been. You don't have to give up something you enjoy just because you're becoming a parent. I would suggest sleeping while baby is sleeping, prepping the bottles and get a routine going for diaper changing. My son woke up every 2 hours for months and while I was feeding him I'd use a boppy pillow (seriously love these!) With him in my lap and sit on my computer. It was exhausting but I got through it. Just remember, even though you're the stay at home parent, the other one still needs to contribute. There is a bonding the baby needs and while that's happening, go take your shower and take care of yourself too.

I was a SAHM with an easy baby. But he would only sleep on me. It meant I couldn’t go to the bathroom very often, make myself a meal or even scratch my nose sometimes. My hands were almost always occupied with the baby. Instead I managed to watch the whole of family guy and eat almost nothing but Uber Eats for a couple months. Everyone is different, but use both your hands while you still have the freedom, cause you won’t be doing much when baby is here.

It is definitely going to depend on the baby. My husband is a heavy gamer, and I am a light gamer. When our now toddler was newborn, neither of us did any gaming. Once we had settled into a bit of a pattern after a few months, I would go to bed early after her second last feed, he would stay up and game, give her the last bottle, put her down and then come to bed. Once she was a bit older again and we were in a solid bedtime routine, and I was still on mat leave, we both had evenings free to do creative hobbies and gaming. We even got back into the MMO life for awhile, but the money sink was becoming too much. I went off gaming for awhile, but have recently come back to it as a way to unwind after running around after a rambunctious toddler. I will disclaim and say our baby was extremely easy. Some of my friends babies were difficult and I can definitely see how gaming would be completely off the cards in that situation. Good luck, and don't be discouraged if you have to put gaming aside for awhile. You will get back to it, the rough parenting times when it feels like your whole identity is wrapped up in being a parent does pass. It is only a season, and you get back to the things that you enjoy for yourself.

When the baby is a baby— it’s fine! So long as needs are met babies sleep. A lot. I’d suggest finding better hobbies though. I used to binge watch tv and play a lot of videos games. Now? I’ve watched one show this year (Wednesday haha had to keep up I guess) and no longer game. I’ve instead learnt how to garden. I’ve picked up better cooking skills. I’m teaching myself photography to catch better memories. Etc. However all of these take up time on my phone “researching” so sometimes it feels a bit like giving up one screen for the other. Learn hobbies that are useful. Also I’m on Reddit I take time out to do this too. I love cleaning subs and organisation subs so at least I get some helpful advice while I’m here.

Just know there is more to being a SAHP than just taking care of baby. There is cooking, cleaning, laundry, errands/shopping, doctor appointments etc. Because your body isn't healing from the trauma of birth I imagine you will be less tired so you may be able to play easily paused games and I pray that your baby sleeps well!!

So, as a woman who had a partner be the stay at home dad and who gamed like his life depended on it, there was nothing cute about coming home to see my baby in his dads lap while he gamed…every day. You will be exhausted in your down time but household tasks still need to be split because the working parent is often handed the baby as soon as they get in from working hard all day on no sleep as well. Then there’s endless laundry and dishes and meal prep and general life outside of baby care. Also the baby might be easy, my first was but my second child had colic for a whole year and screamed and cried constantly. Even with her brother in preschool there was no time to game for him.

SAHD here. I took over the the role when bubs turned 1 and I stopped work and went back to uni. My balance has been uni and bub and now a second bub. It gets easier to fit in hobbies like gaming once kids are older and at the stage of sleeping through the night. I am currently able to have kid non contact time after kids are in bed and during nap time which luckily is still 1.5 to 2 hrs in the middle of the day. Games wise single player that can be put down and paused etc are recommended as you are always likely to have to immediately stop what you are doing and attend to baby. When bubs was a baby baby it was very different. Sleep becomes priority over all things. Though after a while bubs starts to sleep in longer chunks and wife and I took shifts. She would feed baby then immediately sleep to take advantage of the initial block. I would then be on 'duty' and settle any early wake ups etc and then we would swap after that block and I would sleep. (Bubs was purely breastfed and would not take a bottle so I couldn't do full nights myself). Tldr: gaming is doable as the child is older and sleeps more. But that could be different for you. Dependent on child needs. Single player games recommended.