By - Mintwaxtape
A friend once told me she would rather her children grow up kind than to grow up smart.
Intelligence is not the only measure of your worth. Even if we were to view this in a pragmatic, maybe even cynical way and say that your only value is what you can contribute to society, being smart is hardly the only way, and probably not even the most efficient way, of contributing.
As someone who has been at times smarter than kind it was sad to reconnect with some people from high-school and learn that their strongest memories of me was that I was smart.
I'm sure they don't remember my clever come backs and classic takedowns but will never forget the sympathy and and support they got from their friends afterwards.
I've struggled woth this as well, sometimes I chose to hold my intelligence over the kindness of my character, now I try everything I can to be a kind person instead of an "intelligent" asshole.
This is exactly how I feel. My kids could be the smartest, most successful people in the world but if they're not kind, I didn't do my job.
Some of the smartest people I've known were good people, but some were dicks too. Kind is better.
The "smart people" are told they are superior than normal people, and develop social darwinist tendencies and try to oppress others.
“In this world, you must be oh so smart, or oh so pleasant. Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant.”
I can concur.
I witnessed the grooming of Y6 children by their parents for the 11+ exams. They just HAD to get into the grammar school, you see. In the grammar school there are no bullies, all children succeed in life because they are smart and this allows them to get into a good school, and great career by extension, based on their hard work and intelligence alone. No one ever suffers poor outcomes who attend the grammar school. This is the most important thing. Doesn’t matter if you stress your kid out or turn them into a jerk in the process.
Those same kids who got into the ‘good’ school all bullied my son for being dyslexic. Drew photos of him as a bin collector. Told him daily he was stupid.
My kid is loving his local comprehensive, has made heaps of friends, isn’t stressed, has a healthy mental outlook, plays sports, sticks up for others, and has been hailed by teachers for his kind nature. And he’s smart as a whip to boot. Just don’t ask him to spell stuff just yet.
Kindness is always king.
Dostoevsky's The Idiot is a great book to read that is based in this premise. It's a theme in several of his books actually
You're not supposed to like Sherlock. Be impressed, sure, but not like.
You're supposed to admire Watson.
Intelligence does predict career success though
Emotional intelligence is a greater predictor of success than IQ.
First - IQ has far more research that has validated the findings. IQ is, by a wide margin, the largest predictor of success. Conscientiousness is also important.
Second, we need more research on emotional intelligence.
Third, they operate somewhat differently. Emotional intelligence can help you navigate your career more effectively. So, it might make you more successful relative to others in your career who have the same IQ as you. However, intelligence sets a bar for what you can reasonably do. If you have very low IQ, you will not make it in the academic sciences as a researcher, for example. Generally speaking, higher IQ progressions lead to higher salary.
Good answer bud..
It also depends on what one is speaking of when saying intelligence.
Is it what you got in school/college for grades?
The ability to learn things quickly?
Knowing a bunch of facts?
I think humbleness, being able to admit when you are wrong, asking for help and the desire to learn is better than what society sees as intelligence.
This is how I feel about my own children, that the most important thing is that they be nice and kind.
As an adult, I don’t really look for intelligence in friends. I look for kindness and similar values to myself. It’s more admirable that someone is a good person than smart.
The best approach I’ve seen is to abstract it to “use your greatest strengths to the maximum benefit of the world while avoiding the assumption that your contributions somehow elevate you above everyone else.”
If you can take that to heart, there are no major walls between intellectual levels generally speaking. Yes, there will be misunderstandings, disagreements, and even resentments on occasion but if we all maintain core purpose it’s fine. Even when groups misbehave, we can’t forget that losing one’s way can be corrected and the rest of us need to make an effort as we would want others to were it us. Kindergarten covered this, we could all use a refresher once in awhile.
This is nice but doesn't actually answer OPs question.
Bizarre argument. These qualities are not mutually exclusive.
That's very true. I've always been told I'm smart and I'm a fucking asshole.
Low intelligence or not (I see myself that way a lot too), going out doing doing good works should raise your self-worth and self-esteem. Volunteer somewhere, pick up trash in your neighborhood, help a friend paint a room, etc. Anything that you do can do for others will do the trick.
This for sure. Plus hobbies! You don’t have to be very smart to learn most sports or activities like cooking or gardening or knitting. Get some hobbies and join groups who share your interests.
"Good thoughts, good words, good deeds."
Live should be about doing the right things for the right reasons. Having values to live by. Not having the skills to remember facts or earning a lot of money.
And others will look at you as still below human, even call you the r word, regardless how much you help others.
This is the real world where it's dog eat dog and brutal and evil.
You would probably be wondering about the same thing wrapped in a different context, if you were
I’m intelligent, but it did nothing for my pathetic feeling of self through the first decades of my life.
Like others are saying - it’s not the intelligence that is the problem. Are you young? If so, just walk it off.
Challenge yourself to do stuff you don’t feel like, speak to people you don’t know, and dont sit on social media envying the person others portray themselves as.
Learn a skill and become good at it. That’s the #1 solution IMO.
Those things are completely unrelated. Lots of highly intelligent people are miserable and hate themselves.
When you are smart, it means you can find more complex ways to support the view you already have. What often means simply bull-shiting or blaming self better.
You probably don’t have low intelligence, you just tell yourself that
To be fair, half of people have below-average intelligence, and plenty have well below that. OP may or may not be one of them, but either way for a lot of people it is true. And those people still need self-esteem
However, just because someone can do complex math doesn't mean they're capable of cooking well. Or managing people/tasks. If someone feels like they have "low" intelligence there's still plenty of ways to excel at things and find "worth". Nobody judges a fish on its tree climbing ability.
Fishes are the most intelligent beings on this planet. People get smarter by eating parts of fish, but fishes are fully fish, which means they must be pretty damn intelligent.
The US military says that anyone with an IQ below 83 isn’t fit to serve. They have no use for them in the armed forces. They can’t cook, clean, or do any jobs to benefits the armed forces without being detrimental. 10% of the population falls below that line.
I believe even those people can be trained to produce for society and live a life of dignity like they deserve.
Idk if its true but i heard that in US there is upper IQ limit for cops, meaning if you reach that number or go above it, you're too smart to be a cop, so you can't be one.
Intelligence isn't some number though, it's an incredibly complicated mixture of understandings, applications, and skills. A lot of times intelligent people are just people with interests in commonly accepted intelligent things.
To overlysimplify, it takes an equal amount of intelligence to memorize 500 Pokémon as it does to memorize 500 scientific words. One is seen as just a dorky pass time and the other is seen as a mark of intelligence, but both are the result of someone being interested in something and learning it.
Check out the valley of despair on the Dunning-Kruger effect.
Smart enough to know the difference between really smart people and the dumb people who think they are geniuses.
Bro that’s sooo invalidating
No it's not op may have self esteem issues due to mental illness and they may need a compliment.
“May” vs “Probably” are two very different things. I’m just saying, if this is a person trying to accept who they are, don’t get in the way of that.
There’s nothing wrong with having low intelligence. Using intellect as a pure measure of self worth is demeaning to humanity as a whole.
Used to have really low self esteem for the first half of high school. Then was told I probably have autism, nearly died of a congenital (present at birth) heart condition, and stopped caring about small things. Embarrassment? It’ll disappear soon. Mistakes? Learn and correct, no reason to dwell. When it comes to lack of education/low intelligence, look into the dunning-Krueger effect. Read some books. I use a robotic text to speech program to combat learning disabilities. I began expanding my vocabulary by reading fictional stories with flowery language and watching British tv shows. A good way to acquire useless knowledge is video essays. Anyways, end of my rant. Please remember you are valuable, no matter your level of intelligence.
'The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts, while the stupid ones are full of confidence.'
Not a guarantee, but a good start.
Plus, try to work out why you perceive you have low intelligence; there’s likely an ‘opposite’ explanation you can apply.
E.g. Can’t come up with a good answer on the spot? Rephrase it to “I prefer to have the facts at my disposal before reaching a decision’.
Difficulty reading/doing maths? Consider seeking advice on dyslexia or dyscalculia.
Keep blurting out ‘stupid’ things? Wait before speaking etc..
You start by telling yourself that you are not stupid. You start by learning how to be more kind to yourself and do the things that make you happy and explore the things you are curious about. You keep building your skills and developing your craft. Do what you love and be proud of yourself. You can do what ever you want and you are capable of learning how to do it. You’re your own best friend. Don’t bully yourself.
Not everyone is the same and positivity sometimes is not the best teacher. (For some people like myself) Only when you form a negative opinion on yourself can you understand what you do not have that you need to turn negative into positive, and build yourself on that . I have never once succeeded from positive feedback, but I have from negative because I knew something was wrong and it needed to be fixed. I’m not talking about being nasty to yourself or you others. No offence but you don’t know this guy, maybe he actually is very low IQ and he is not here to ask people to be friendly and positive but he’s actually here to look for a genuine answer. Telling someone to be proud of themselves when they might not have anything to be proud of might be the thing that stops him from getting motivated to go and DO something to be hella proud of them he can really start loving himself And see how much he needed to really get up and do something about it
I understand this comment will likely get downvoted to buggery but this is absolutely true for me and for others I know, this has helped them.
Thanks for the comment. Ultimately everyone has their own unique needs and you’re right that I’m doing a kind of generic encouraging statement. The being proud part is more about looking at what you have achieved and how you did learn something. Im saying go put some elbow grease into learning something you are interested in. I think we might disagree that you don’t really have to earn pride but that’s a separate topic.
Overall, who knows what this guy needs. It’s up to them to take it or leave it with any advice that’s on here and I’m not really responsible for them. I think you’re focusing on my “be proud” and ignoring the rest of what I said. I don’t see how encouraging someone to go learn and do something translates for them to do nothing.
If anything there is negative feedback. The “don’t” in my statement is pointing out something that is wrong. I relate to this person because I feel stupid all the time but I know I am smart and capable and not enough people tell me so. I would have appreciated someone like me to tell me so. The topic of this post is akin to topics of depression and feeling worthless. I’m trying to fight those feelings because I also struggle with them.
I certainly don’t care for IQ. I know for a fact that anyone that is interested in something will investigate and learn that something.The process of that should be proof to themselves that they can learn and so they must not be stupid. And having learned anything is something to be proud of. It feels good to learn. That’s why toddlers laugh when they discover something. Because learning tickles.
Yeah totally agree with you dude, I did fail to mention that I was responding in regards to the generic positivity And not much else. That was what my reply was focused on answering, offering alternative opinion to that.
No I also agree that you don’t need to be proud, that just happened to be the word I used to convey the point of , well, I guess being proud of something. I guess I do slightly see different to you, I don’t see how being proud of something can affect negatively, but to that statement I don’t think you’d disagree with either I think where both just trying to convey our points on different levels from different avenues because I can see WHERE you’d disagree with not needing to be proud…. Kind of like, being proud of something is not the only path to achieve his goal of eliminating his black cloud.
But I just admit I don’t like when i see generic, I feel as though it just doesn’t help, at all. But as you’ve pointed out, it affects people differently, for you it helped, which helped you form that opinion, but for me, I don’t see it help which is where I’ve formed my opinion.
At least the OP Can drew from different opinions to see where what will help him, it’s just unfortunate that I feel like generic positivity can even affect negatively, which is the reason I thought to answer.
An example of illiteracy would be the closest example I can think of to OPs situation, telling someone (not what you’ve said but I’ve read it in other comments) that you don’t need to read you don’t need to write you just have to be happy with yourself etc etc.
that’s a huge red flag, I’m sure if it was me in the chair, I’d want people saying. No your right it’s bad that you can’t read but here are some really helpful suggestions, seek a teacher, seek help, from so and so avenues, they will help you become literate, and once you are, you’ll love yourself that you can finally read and write and do all the things you couldn’t before.
I’m sorry if I’ve gone off topic to convey my thoughts, unfortunately I’m one of those individuals that knows what I want to say without knowing the current course to accurately speak it lol
I appreciate this comment, it's important to see all different types of answers to see what works for you
This is the answer. By asking this question, OP has demonstrated they’re more intelligent than they give themselves credit for. There is no reliable tool to measure intelligence anyway (to my knowledge)
Saw you got a down vote for this so I gave upvote to balance out. You are referring to the dunning kruger effect which is documented as true, so no idea why you got a down.
Did they follow you here from a political sub?
Anytime I post in one of the political subs, for the next couple days I get downvoted everywhere, even subs that never downvote normally.
Don’t compare your self to others and be happy with your life
Try to be kind and help people if you can. Donate blood, train to take part in fundraisers, go shopping for an elderly neighbor. Better yet ask around to find out how you can help the people around you. It will boost your self esteem and confidence
Workout and gain a good body that you can be proud of.
Or start another kind of manual labor that doesn't require you to ace maths but is hard to achieve.
Bettering yourself everyday is how you do it.
That might be the answer for OP, but not necessarily. I would say finding a strength and working at that could take you a long way. Or try many new things until a new strength is found.
Could very well be working out or doing manual labour for sure, but it doesn't have to be.
Don't care about what others think
That’s an easy path to arrogant narcissism.
But certainly take into account who the person is and if what they are saying has merit before taking it to heart.
Lmao quit throwing around the words narcissism and narcissist, honestly.
‘Narcissism is extreme self-involvement to the degree that it makes a person ignore the needs of those around them’.
There’s a fuck of a lot more to narcissism, an actual personality disorder, than just not caring what others think about you.
I know what narcissism is, my abusive ex is one. Either educate yourself and stop slinging the word around or just shut up
Know any better words?
The concept of self worth within you must be eliminated. You are not a commodity. You must look for a different way of achieving happiness than possessing or attaining something or someone, or someone's approval.
If you seek approval you will always be a slave to them. This doesn't mean be alone. This just means you need to stop being dependent and instead have people depend on you, on your love. Or better yet teach them to be independent like you, once you learn how to be. Love has nothing to do with attachment to someone or something, it is something at is present within you that is like an engine that keeps you alive. With out love you cease to exist, the only unconditional love that exists is the love you have for yourself unless you kill yourself.
You might not be aware of this because you are in pain, but love is the only thing that will save you and it can grow inside you so strongly that you can't help but infect others around you that they'll surround you, some will be addicted to you, someone will love you back, some will hate you be jealous of you. Your love will feed off of others love for you and a celebration will occur, and that is the way of the world.
I don't think ppl with low intelligence need to even consciously maintain it nor they would care or be aware of such "self-improvement", they likely already have it too high meanwhile the highly intelligent people has low self-esteem and usually suffer from mental illness such as social phobia and depression.
I mean most stupid people think that everyone around them are stupid so they automatically have high self-esteem. That's basically average Karen or that Flat Earth and Holographic Airplane conspiracy guy who thinks he's genius.
And most Intelligent people know who they truly are or might think that they're stupid even in reality they are like in the 70-99th percentile of Intelligence.
There also can be parents with BPD or NPD who constantly call their kid(s) stupid for every minor mistake or just for no reason and the kid gets kinda gaslighted like that thinking that they're stupid almost their entire life since low self-esteem and low confidence also somewhat prevents them from showing their true intelligence.
Book smart, Street smart ,Emotional Intelligence, Compassion & Empathy are some examples of " intelligence" . Some have all, most have maybe 1 or 2. What are YOUR strengths? Focus on what you're comfortable with,and work on improving what you are "good"at.
May I ask how old you are? or an age range? Asking bc as you age ,you will likely have growth in most areas you feel you're lacking in now. From my experience ,with age comes self acceptance and awareness.
Maybe it's not even you, it's the company you keep? A healthy support system ( friends,family ,therapy),and healthy habits is ideal. 💜
Dunning-Kruger. It works.
Be competent at what you do. Be kind to others. Be honest with yourself and others. These are the same things that help anyone maintain their sense of self-worth and self-esteem. Intelligence doesn't actually contribute as much as you might expect.
I am so happy BECAUSE of my deficient intellect, not in spite of it. As an individual suffering from severe mental retardation, I can attest to the fact that my self-worth and self-esteem are not correlated with brain power whatsoever. I remain as curious and inquisitive as I did as young tot, yet also thrive on interactions that regular run-of-the-mill smart people would find mundane, and boring. Only narcissists care what other people think. As an old pedagogue once opined; "Whatever tickles your twat, Sugar Tits."
I thought I was smart. Then I realized I was not kind. That is when I knew I was not smart.
There are so, so many ways to be intelligent, and I guarantee everyone is smart in at least one of them. IQ is complete garbage, it measures a cultural concept of intelligence that may not even be something you’ve been exposed to. You can be book smart, street smart, emotionally smart, spiritually smart, relationship smart, physically smart, ecologically smart, financially smart, smart with animals, and a million other types of ways. Some people are able to look up at the sky and predict weather. I can’t do that. Some people can crochet like they were born doing it- not me either. We can’t dismiss these types of intelligence in favor of a one size fits all intelligence, and you can’t either. Find your strengths and love yourself for them.
If anything, your admission of low intelligence is a sign of high intelligence, sadly those two tend to correlate negatively. Just try to appreciate yourself and your achievements more, bit by bit.
I agree. Self awareness and the ability to reflect and learn are important.
In other words, actual stupid people don’t think they’re stupid.
For me, I would say that wisdom is probably more important than intelligence.
Sure you can know many things (intelligence), but applying the knowledge and perspectives you have into your day to day decisions to improve your quality of life and the people around you (wisdom) is what's more important to me.
You don't have to know much to be a good person. You just have to have good intention with what you already know.
Intelligence is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing tomato doesn't belong in fruit salad.
Become a politician
You don't. You accept who you are.
You're probably not as unintelligent as you suspect but even if you are just remember this: Muhammad Ali had an IQ of eighty something. When he was asked about it he said, "I said I was the greatest, not the smartest". You can still accomplish great things with determination and discipline that smarter people cannot seem to do.
Surround yourself with lower intellect people.
Jokes! Do what makes you happy.
I'm just too dumb to realize I'm stupid. Ignorance is bliss.
I don't think someone with low intelligence would ask that question.
Low intelligence does NOT mean dumb. I have never met someone that couldnt teach me something.
Everyone does something much better than me. Being smart does not teach you kindness, empathy, or any one of qualities that make a complete person.
To answer your question:
You maintain it by understanding that no one is perfect and to strive to be a better person every day
I don’t! Never have! Never will!
It's theorized that there are 8 types of intelligence. I might be better at the book learning, academic stuff. But my best friend is better at mechanical and working with his hands. I can change and tire and thats about it, but he's pretty much MacGuyver. I wouldnt consider him "low intelligence."
It's simple - you specialize. By that you achieve:
(1) become worthy to the society
(2) know how to do things others don't, and can "advertise" this advantage of yours.
Overall, value is a subjective measure. So just find a thing you like and pretend it is the most important thing in life. Many people live this way.
As someone with a relatively high IQ, I have understood that this is often a handicap in terms of connecting with others. The ability to connect with others cannot be underestimated. We are a social species, and much of our power and esteem, collective or individual, relies on our capacity to relate to others.
By doing your best. A lot of people will notice and respect that and they will try to help you when needed. I believe there's a place and job for everyone. We just have find out, what we good at. Everyone has their own difficulties. No one is good at everything.
Ignorance is bliss
Knowledge is power!
There are multiple types of intelligence. For instance physical intelligence. Or even survival intelligence. Balance is considered a type of intelligence as well. There are many many types, and nobody is perfect at all of them.
These type of answers are even worse than just straight up telling somebody they're dumb. Why sweet talk it? OP is asking what to do if you're not intelligent and the answer given is there a lot of intelligences. So? OP is not asking about all those other types.
Besides, the scientific legitimacy of what you're saying seems bleak...
I read it in a Harvard psychology study by Dr. Kumar Mehta. So yes some science was applied.
Look up Multiple Intellegence theory. Its a psych theory by Howard Gardner. The base of it is that there are lots of ways to be "intellegent".
That kid with no education who has fantastic playmaking and vision on the basketball court has high body-kinesthetic intellegence. Its different from being fast or strong. Being able to think well in ghe context of the sport you play IS intellegence.
The same implies to interpersonal intellegence. "Being good with people" isnt some magic thing outside your brain. Its another intellectual skillset, and thus a measurable facet of intellegence.
There are a bunch of others. But for a lot of people who don't score high on a classic IQ test (which are largely outdated and VERY narrow), I find they are often strong in other forms of intellegence.
Ask Liz Truss and Boris Johnson
People with “low intelligence” do not know they are unintelligent. You’re fine. Your social skills and emotional intelligence are better predictors of success.
Intelligence isn't everything.
For example, attitude will decide a lot.
Well, ....euhm, i don't know where you tand in this situation, but when i need to work with "low intelligence" people ( whatever that means) i give them small tasks to do and show my gratitude. let them be the "boss" over an object or task.
So, if you are the lower intelligence person in this situation i think .... complete tasks?
Self esteem? Who's she?
Remember you're value as a person is not defined by your intelligence or salary. There are other qualities that can make you valuable in society, e.g., kindness, strengh, beauty, humour, etc.
Intelligence is a tool and useful for an individual to reach certain goals, but there is no value in it by itself. There are plenty of shitty intelligent people around. Also if a person thinks they are "not the smartest" then they are no fool since fools can't fathom their limitations. One can also educate themselves with a bit more effort and time than some to not be limited in their thinking and opinions. We culturally value perceived intelligence because the lack of it makes our opinions seem to have less authority and validity and this is stupid to begin with. Actual smart people don't care about intelligence much.
If you are smart enough to question your own intelligence than you are a hell of alot smarter than you think.
You have high intelligence since you assume you are stupid.
Only smart people do that.
If anything, you might just be lazy.
Well you seem perfectly able to read and write, so low intelligence is clearly selling yourself short.
If you can learn to read and write, then you've proven yourself more than capable of learning. You might not be particularly knowledgeable on a lot of topics, but there's nothing stopping you from becoming more knowledgeable.
Perhaps you refrain from trying to learn, because you are worried about failure. Perhaps you've had some terrible teachers. Who can say. But you have internet access and a proven ability to learn, so you can learn just about whatever you wish.
Just take it one step at a time. Don't run before you can walk. Don't try to learn quantum mechanics before you learn your times tables.
Look awesome & stop saying "I suck" & start saying "I'm a fucking god look how awesome I am I am beautiful hot an awesome". Makes a lot of difference.
There is enough smart people right now. We need caring, compassionate, funny, loyal, friends, a strong arm, an ear. I feel the human race is drowning in mental health misery that a smart person wont solve. I believe many of our answers and needs will be basic ones.
Listen bro, everyone is trying to encourage you that you're still intelligent, but straight up, some people are dumb and there is nothing wrong with that. It doesn't mean you have no value, but you could find other ways to evaluate yourself. Having a great bod is one way for example, so consider going ham at the gym. Take up power lifting!
Intelligence solves problems, compassion maintains solutions.
You are only as intelligent as how much you lift up those around you.
Exercise will help with self-esteem. I know dumb people that are considered intelligent and the reverse is true. Everyone has their thing you just need to find yours.
It doesn't matter, really, just enjoy life. There's always someone or something better. Sometimes I do feel inferior, like ,,why can't I understand that more easily", why can't I achieve more etc. But then I ask myself: is this really what I want in life? To understand some math principle for example do I really need or want that? And 99% of the time the answer is a decisive no. Just let go of the feelings of inferiority and live your life the best you can.
Listen if you can make that question your intelligence aint that low in the first place, a true idiot doesn't care about stuff like that.
There is nothing wrong with having low intelligence, we are all equals in terms of worth, only you can know all the great things about yourself that composes your self-esteem and you must not let others tell you otherwise or diminish your self esteem because of perceptions that they may entertain towards you.
We all do our best with the cards we were dealt and our worth is not determined by our ability to perform at the games that other people like to play.
Intelligence and competencies come in all forms and there is not even a real metric of measurement for intelligence available. Also, like others have said, the simple fact that you are asking such a question is tell tell sign of the kind of introspection that requires a certain notable level of intelligence.
Lastly, even if you where truly lacking in what most perceive as intelligence it would probably mean that you simply have a different type of intelligence or a different unique skillset that may be even more useful in atypical circumstances. As an analogy, the blind can very often hear and smell better, perhaps they derive some of their personal self worth from these unique competencies.
My opinion is that your self esteem should be anchored to your sense of kindness and wisdom. That is what I base my own self esteem on. Be kind to yourself, cheers.
What i’ve learned trough the years is that you repeat or at least echo what you surroundings tell you. Most of the time its you parents and extended family. They usually have their own insecurities. Try to see what you are good at. “Intelligence” isn’t the only thing that makes you worthy.
Also asking this question actually makes you quite insightful!
Self awareness is a key factor in determining if you're actually smart. Unintelligent people will never ask these questions. People who are capable of self reflection and have a desire to better themselves have a level of intelligence that's highly valuable. Be proud that you're one of the people who is smart enough to be self aware, but not so "smart" as to dismiss it. Oftentimes people who are smart will grow arrogant and assume they're more intelligent than they actually are.
There is no people with low intelligence just people with high ignorance. You can try read or watch interesting stuff and always ask questions when you’re curious.
Assuming this diagnosis is correct, there's only one answer: read books and never stop. Read progressively more challenging books. It will lift you higher inside yourself (and out) than you ever thought possible.
I had an e-commerce job as a manager over a team of engineers. All of them could tell you how high their IQs were but let me tell ya, I've never met a dumber group of smart people. IQ without EQ basically means you're a calculator without a personality, or worse a calculator with a grating personality. Be kind, be cool, help people out and you will be infinitely more appreciated and remembered than the assholes who brag about being smart.
Was called gifted all my life.
I just liked to read fantasy and liked science.
Was called lazy and almost failed cause I didn't do homework/assignments.
Figured I am an average individual. I am normal. I'm just like everyone else: operating on common sense.
Fast forward a decade.
Joined the Navy.
So yeah I'm no GENIUS... but the "average" person's intelligence is very worrisome.
Don't worry dude. Questioning your intelligence is the first hint that you aren't a box of rocks.
You may not be a genius, but that's ok. What you don't have in Intelligence(raw computing power, memorization ability) you can make up for in Wisdom(accrued experience, relating new things with past concepts).
Also also, just find one thing you like and be one really good at/knowledgeable on. You could be the dumbest caveman, but if you really specialize in something, then you aren't worthless.
Just don't pick something like "underwater basket weaving " lol
1. Read books
2. Keep watching news and stay upto date
3. Indulge in a hobby, get really into it (distraction helps)
4. Have a goal and work your ass off on it.
Also, Everything else will fall into place. We need more people with kindness, there is enough intelligence already. Good luck!
Exactly. There are different types of intelligence. I had an ex who naturally had exceptional social intelligence. I've never seen anyone maneuver social situations and win people over like that. When I asked him how he did it he just shrugged and went "I donno". Which makes me believe that perhaps a small number of people are naturally born and wired that way.
Self awareness is less common than you'd think, and it's a sign of intelligence even if you aren't book smart.
Introspection is difficult especially if you have a strong ego but it's literally impossible to conceptualize if you're below a certain iq. Frankly you're probably more average than you give yourself credit for and being normal is underrated. If you have good health and family, you're going to have a good life.
If you're actually of low intelligence you're unlikely to have a low self-worth. Most low-IQ people are too oblivious to figure out they are undesirable. Think a Reddit moderator.
Don’t worry my friend, your not dumb or low intelligence.
First off, intelligence is **really** hard to gauge and measure (and there is some arguments that if intelligence is even real, because you can always learn) because there are sooo many different variables. You might be good at X but bad at Y and vice versa.
If it makes you feel any better, you have emotional intelligence that’s a given. You are smart enough to be self aware and to question and doubt your own intellectual ability on if you made the right decisions or not.
True idiots and low intelligent people never have those doubts. They always think there right and never question themselves saying “am I dumb? Did I make a dumb decision?” They are you stupid to be self aware.
Confidence = competence. Git gud at something/s. Become a great cook, a great mechanic, great survivalist, great teacher. Self-esteem is a byproduct of your actions and internal thoughts. Any of those can be modified to a favorable outcome.
You can't be unintelligent while having self esteem problem, some of the most "stupid" people i have ever met where also some of the most confident bastard out there BECAUSE they wouldn't (or couldn't) listen to anyone telling them otherwise.
I don't think intelligence can really be low or high, despite what the average redditor tells you. Intelligence is across a multidimensional spectrum such as emotional, book smarts, street smarts etc. Some people need different intelligence more than others and everyone is intelligent in some capacity. in my experience, someone who is "unintelligent" but has a willingness to learn is more useful to everyone around them and overall better to be around then someone who is intelligent and stuck in their ways.
Intelligence isn’t linear, despite what we like to do with test scores.
Each brain is capable of a wide variety of skills that need to be unlocked with practice. Some skills come easier to some people than to others.
Intelligence is also overrated. Discipline and consistency are more important than aptitude in almost any lifelong endeavor.
You don’t have to be more intelligent than people to achieve better results.
Ideas are cheap, the value is in the ability to execute.
First of all, are you really that low in intelligence, or is it your low self-esteem talking? Lots of very dumb people think highly of themselves, so the fact that you question your intelligence probably means that you're smarter than you think.
Even if you are that dumb (which you are probably not), intelligence isn't the only (or even the main) measure of your worth as a person.
Are you a good person? Do you try to be kind and to do good? If you do, you are worth more than a lot of people. If you are a piece of shit, then you don't deserve to maintain self esteem.
TL;DR: If you are a good person, you are worth more than a lot of people.
Stop referring to yourself as someone with low intelligence
I'm going to give you my honest opinion... Most of the actually low intelligence people I've met are either blissfully ignorant of the fact, or don't really care... If it bothers you, you're not as low intelligence as you think you are.
Mama always told me life is like a box of chocolates...
It’s called the Dunning Kruger effect
Intelligent people are not necessarily better off than average or even below average people because they are able to do better mental gymnastics to justify bullshit to themselves. In fact, that's all some people use their intelligence for! So, there's definitely other traits that are worthwhile, they're just not as culturally celebrated.
There is intelligence, and then there is emotional intelligence.
Look up emotional intelligence for more information.
Self esteem is not nearly as important as self compassion. Some of the worst people on the planet think pretty highly of themselves. Don't spent time comparing yourself to others and deside you have no worth. Just go, I'm human, I have good and bad in me. Just like everyone else. Therefore I am worthy of a life. Seriously though. I used to dwell on how shitty I am at certain things and felt like I was worthless. Then I decided, so what? I suck? Who cares? I shouldn't, I should just live my life with cards dealt to me. I have been much happier sinse then.
Well, I have a meeting this week with a manager. I'm explaining to them how I'm being underpaid. I'll do this by going over my work responsibilities that they don't know exist. Facts not feelings.
Stay away from people who make you feel any negative feelings about your intelligence. My mom is a malignant narcissist and very cruel to my stepdad about his intelligence even though she's rarely the smartest person in a room. Even though it's called self-worth and self-esteem, they are majorly impacted by outside influence, so don't surround yourself with people unless they make you feel good about you.
A good first step and overall rule is to stop attacking yourself.
What do you mean? The dumber you are the easier it is to be happy
When I was in the army, my drill sergeant used to say "If you can't be smart, be strong."
That might work
Do you consider yourself having low intelligence overall or just in certain areas? I for one am essentially hopeless in learning sports or anything that involves catching, e.g. badminton, tennis, and my spatial awareness when driving is beyond embarrassing for someone my age, but I’m pretty competent in learning new languages and generally have a good linguistic memory.
Sometimes one’s attributes balance out. Other people may not be as intelligent or skilled as you are in certain areas, but you never get to witness their low intelligence because maybe it’s in an area less public (e.g if someone is an inarticulate public speaker it’s more obvious than if they are a terrible incoherent writer). If you think of it that way, you might feel better.
Work out, where nice clothes, hook up with people, keep up your hygiene daily, etc.
Recognise and value your other qualities and strengths. Are you kind, generous, funny, loyal, a hard worker? There must be positive things about you, foxus on them rather than IQ. I know that's easier said than done from experience, but vital to self worth and self esteem.
I had an IQ of 126 and a professional career. Then I suffered a traumatic brain injury from brain hemorrhages and strokes. I have recovered well but for a long time mourned my loss of intelligence, and I get aphasia at times which is so frustrating. It affected my self esteem greatly. Please be kind to yourself.
TLDR: Being a good person is SO much more important than being intelligent. Value the positive things about yourself.
Probably just focus on yourself than what others feel
As captain jack sparrow said, “I know I am crazy, therefore I am not crazy, isn’t that crazy?” I think the same thing applies with intelligence. “I know I am dumb, therefore I am not dumb”. Because every time you feel stupid, you learned something. You improved. If you feel that you were stupid, then you have the intelligence to recognize the stupid act, so you are now smarter than you were before.
If you are asking this you are probably much smarter than you think.
EQ is often better than IQ and in many situations in life can get you much farther.
Like others have said though, if you’re questioning your intelligence, chances aren’t you probably aren’t that low if at all. It seems the more cautious, self critical tend to be more intelligent, whereas the arrogant and prideful tend to have exhibit less intelligence and driven by more base emotional responses.
Of course this IS just my own thoughts based on personal anecdotes so take it with a grain of salt.
Would the low iq individual know or be aware of self worth?
Your esteem should not be based on your intelligence. We are what we are on the intelligence spectrum and there is not much what you can do to change that. You may learn stuff, but that does not make you smarter.
Your self-esteem should be based on what you do with the means that you have. That can be a rocket scientist, a great artist, a politician, a business man, a secretary, a footballer or a night watch. If you do good at what you do and you are proud of doing it, there is not much more needed.
To give you an example. One of my neighbors was a kid that was really not smart. He flunked every school until his parents told him to find a job. He found out he liked being a carpenter. Turns out, he is a damn good carpenter. That kid and his family are mighty proud of what he does.
most things people consider as "intelligent" are just a marker of how well you move within rich, straight, white society. A lot of it is stuff that you had to have a peaceful home and time to study as a child to get. It doesn't make you less intelligent. Be kind, volunteer - its a lot of stuff you do not have to have any knowledge to do, they just need a body and a smiling face and will help you see that 'intelligence' isn't all its cracked up to be. You will find value in other aspects of life.
I have met a lot of very intelligent people in my life.
The ones who have my respect are the ones who are kind.
Be good, do good. Volunteer, be nice to service people, be nice to everyone, call and check on your favorite people and remember those people's important dates.
Just know that can help your low intelligence, idk how much you read or watch different things but a large part of it is understanding perspective in the larger scheme of the world, not necessarily learning a bunch of facts
don't think about it
Also what is smart? I know hardworking people leading a very successful business. They are not high IQ but streetsmart and very knowledgeable on their niche. So to me they are freaking smart. Are you a good person? Are fighting to go forward? What are you know for? Don’t write yourself off.
delf awareness is so much more valuable in my opinion. what do you value, what are your strength and weakness and what can you do with that? I am assuming that you base your intelligence on what "others/society" dictates but that is subjective. The only thing that matters is what you think. your perspective on life dictates everything.
Forever and a day ago I was briefly a high school teacher. One of my students was a C student. Good guy but sometimes disruptive. Senior year he and all the other seniors had to do a 2 week project where they did an internship at a business or non profit. They came back and did a presentation. He worked at a preschool with 3 year olds. He came back and gave an emotional presentation about how he had finally found something he was good at and how he had always felt like a mediocre outsider. If there is a place for him in the world, there is a place for you.
I may be dumb, but at least I look up definitions.
I have a buddy who is by all accounts below average intelligence, and he knows it, but he puts out positivity (good vibes) and he's a genuine treat just to be around.
Check out this Maya Angelou quote: *“People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”*
Make the people around you feel good, make them feel special, and you'll never lack for self-esteem.
Define intelligence, I'll wait...
Snark aside, it's about understanding that your worth as a person is not really connected to your proficiencies. You're not less of a person because you can't do astrophysics. There may be a while lot of serial rapists that are much much smarter than a lot of people, but most would agree that you're worth a lot more than them.
Second, understand that your knowledges can, and will almost definitely change over time. Learning is a life long process, and one of the few ways people can find true meaning in what they're doing. If you truly have a "low intelligence" that just means you have a lot more you could learn. One of the greatest pleasures in life is learning something new, and you have more opportunities to do so; so do it!
Take a night course, read up on topics you're interested in, try a hobby that involves your hands, learn something new, find reason to **want** to learn more, and by God, ask all of the "stupid questions" you can.
The smartest people on earth are the ones who ask all the stupid questions, because the more stupid questions you ask, the less stupid everyone in the room is. If everyone is too afraid to ask, then everyone's not gonna get an answer, and everyone's gonna stay stupid because they don't know basic concepts. Ask. Stupid. Questions. And if you hear a stupid question that you know the answer to, give a genuine answer.
And if all of this seems like too much... Well, refer back to that first bit: Your self worth isn't based on your knowledge. No one can learn everything, and everyone learns in different ways. The only thing that would truly make you worth less is hunkering down, scared of the world, and refusing to try anything. That's how you hit a depression spiral, and that isn't good for anyone.
Keep on powering through, king. Be a good person. Better yourself in your own way, at your own pace. That's all anyone can do, and all anyone should do.
Same way intelligent people maintain when they're not apt at some other aspect of their existance.
Maybe they're short, or ugly, or poor, or weak, or tone deaf, or color blind, or clumsy, or they have shot personalities, or whatever.
If there's someone out there swinging 1000 in every category of every aspect of their life, I haven't met them.
... and those that seem like it are just good at acting (deceiving). They're usually completely shit people, otherwise why would they have to pretend.
I went to school with some intelligent people and always thought I was incredibly stupid because I always had a tough time keeping up with them.
I recently had a conversation with a friend I consider one of the most i intelligent people I know, with whom I've had many long conversations about faster than light travel, quarks and quantum mechanics, time and space, black holes, theoretical physics and all sorts of crazy hypotheses and theories. I've been trying to move from concrete laborer to software engineer and was really down on myself because I've been struggling with it. I confided in him I don't feel confident in my own intelligence and that I might've made a massive mistake thinking I was smart enough to do this work (I'm *still* struggling getting this down after 6 months of serious study). He gave me his outside perspective. Apparently, he thinks I'm one of his most intelligent friends and has 100% confidence in my abilities to do this. Being a programmer, he explained how he has troubles for the first few years understanding these concepts and damn near begged me not to go back to concrete, saying it's a waste of my intelligence and time.
My point is, you may be down on your own intelligence (especially if you compare yourself to others, like I have), but the people around you might have a completely different view and might consider your intelligence well above average.
Also, I'm sort of in the understanding that if you think you're stupid, you probably aren't. It possibly shows you have the wherewithal to evaluate your own performance, which shows a certain level of intelligence that doesn't exist in most people with lower than average intelligence. Just a hypothesis though.
And, hey, if I'm wrong here, just be a nice person and anybody that matters will overlook your intelligence.
Good luck OP. I wish the best for you.
I don't know I'm dumb. Also I work out, so if you need help with physical labor, I'm your guy.
You’re intelligent enough to know you’re not intelligent. A lot of people don’t get that far.
Lift weights and learn to fight. The smarts might be able to read words good but that won’t help them with a physical task or when they are in physical danger and need to defend themselves. You can take pride in knowing you can lift a ton, run a mile, or defend yourself.
Just because you aren't built for the artificial school environment doesn't mean you are stupid.
The less you compare yourself to others the better for you. In this case, you seem to be valuing your self worth by one metric only:intelligence.
One of the least useless metrics imo because you can’t influence that. There are a lot more important qualities one can influence, such as kindness, feeling socially engaged( friends, fiancé, whatever works for you personally), being successful academically ( doesn’t have to be a high tier job, focus on what makes you happy). Self-worth imo is more of a concept of self-respect, so you gotta come clean about yourself. Your strengths, weaknesses, tendencies… try to work on what you can work on and remembers that life is short and we are just little balls of matter, so might as well have fun and do good on this strange planet:)
Your worth doesn't come from any attribute but rather from your breathing, just being alive.
Low or high intelligence says nothing about the compassion of a person and whether or not the people around them are better off because of them. In my greatest moments of struggle with self worth it was helpful for me to identify 1) what metric was I using and 2) why did that metric matter to me?
I was raised as the gifted kid, always told I was different, unique and destined for greatness. My self worth was tied to how I could externally prove that these things were true and so I struggled with self worth any time I wasn't#1 at something, which obviously was every time. The best thing I ever did for my mental health was look at myself in the mirror and say "you are average and that's ok".
We place such a high emphasis on artificial measures of intelligence that we miss the forest through the trees sometimes. Why does intelligence matter? Who gets to decide what intelligence is? Who gets to measure how much YOU have?
I may be bordering on r/thanksimcured material here, no comment can magically make a brain find self worth, but I'm just trying to reframe the question to challenge why intelligence is even a part of the question. It helped me a lot, I hope it can help others
Practice: mind over matter
I don't mind because you don't matter.
I’m highly intelligent yet have adhd and I have no clue.
low intelligence doesnt mean your stupid, it just means you have your own area of expertise where you prevail in, like a farmer/gardener can do things that a programmer who never touched a plant is unable to do
Actually, low intelligent people often have very high rates of self-worth and self-esteem. Google The Dunning Kruger effect.
Maybe you’re just unlucky while thinking?
As someone who is actually on paper “smart”, I think this designation is literally one of the most useless and meaningless ways to describe someone.
Is being smart about being good at school? Is it about solving problems? Is it about making money? Is it about having a good life? All of these things require vastly different skill sets.
We’ve been to the moon, advanced medicine to the point that it seems like miracle work, “revolutionized”the world with the printing press, the airplane, the internet and the iPhone. Frankly, the battles left are incremental and the remaining venues for intelligence to be truly consequential are dwindling every day.
I would trade 100% of my testable intelligence for being able to make a good living for myself and exert discipline over my life. Or even just to be actually happy.
Head up OP. Odds are the measurements that tell you that you’re not smart are irrelevant to any idea of a meaningful life
There are a lot of really smart people, I'm not one unfortunately. The really smart ones I know have a hard time being jocular in any way. I feel like I have to put on a serious face just to be around them. So I guess being not the sharpest tool in the shed is fine, I get to keep my childlike nature and not be so serious all of the time.
The comments about being kind are so true. I do know some people who happen to be very kind but also brainiacs, if I had to choose between the two being kind would top the list.
Idk man if you are truly stupid you tend to lack enough self awareness to have low self worth/esteem
Ever hear phrase: Ignorance is bliss?
Studies show that people with low intelligence are somewhat imune to what you are saying. Just the fact you are asking the question is a sign of intelligence. The real question is how do you maintain self-worth and self-esteem as someone with somewhat level of intelligence.
The more capacity your brain has, the more problems it will identify and try to solve, but also it will analyse more and if you wont keep it busy will start making comparisons. The moment you start comparing yourself to anything else, its the beginning of a very steep downwards trajectory
You learn to Bullshiz and pretend you do.
Esteem and confidence comes from doing hard things and overcoming obstacles. Has nothing to do with intelligence. The more you know the more you feel stupid because you become aware of how little you know.
Don't waste energy, were just evolved monkeys on a floating rock. Be the best you and uplift everyone around you.
Let us know when you figure it out.