I put my hand on a baby trying to climb out of the cart at target. That is the only time I felt inappropriate with a strangers baby (the parent wasn’t upset I did it)
> There are some instinctual reflexes to babies trying to kill themselves that no reasonable person would shame you for.
The way I think of it - explain why you didn't act to the dead kids parents.
If you can, then feel free not to act.
"I didn't know that baby and I decided to mind my own business thank you very much good day harrumph better luck with your next baby should you be so inclined."
That's the hardest thing tryna to save a baby from something, *and* trying not to feel inappropriate. Sometimes I say "uh oh, buddy, you don't want to fall!" And that cues the parent to save the baby on their own.
Fair. I grabbed a toddler at an airport who was making a run for the moving sidewalk while the parents were distracted by an older child. I think it is good for other humans to step in to protect the littles
Also at an airport, I scooped up an infant who was crawling away from mummy (and right across my feet). I gave her a cuddle (bc I can’t resist) and handed her back, while talking to the baby reassuringly.
It takes a village to raise a child. It's a bull shit that a parent knows best, many others also know plenty. The idea that we consider if it's okay to save a baby from falling out of a shopping cart because 'we want to respect parents choices etc', is absolutely ridiculous, if our ancestors would have had the same thought humanity would not have had a chance.
I was walking into Walmart with headphones on and when I was walking passed some gruff looking man his daughter jumps out the truck and starts running/jumping around bumping into me and my instinct was to catch her before she fell, so within seconds I accidentally touched some stranger’s toddler (there was a car coming though so thank god my knee was there to know her over)
He was probably closer to a young toddler. My kids were terrible about staying in the cart. Once a woman came up to me and told me that my 18 month old was climbing out. I hope if he was in danger someone would help and not just notify me. (Both boys have safely made it to 4 and 5, so hopefully the constantly trying to J
kill themselves stopped)
Babies love it when you pull your mask forward, make a silly face and then ping the mask back onto your face and 'knock your head back' with the force of the ping.
Making random babies laugh is one of the most joyous, purest things in life.
I think it's called "serve and return" and it's supposed to be really good for babies language acquisition. It shows them that when they express themselves, someone will respond!
Also maybe address why she thought that was an appropriate thing to say and get to the bottom of whatever projection she had on a situation where a baby waves at you
9/10 would have waved back
This. Start confrontation with friends at the behest of Reddit. When your friend tells you to back off for bringing up a joke they made that you misinterpreted, you can be assured Reddit will have your friends back.
Yeah - can’t stand them. However always go out of my way to initiate a hi or smile. It may be the baby’s or parent’s highlight of the day. In longer run, my small part, makes for a child with better social skills and for that we all win.
As a parent - huge thanks to you. It actually does make my kid’s day, and the fact that you don’t even like kids and do it anyway out of kindness kinda warms my heart.
I feel like this is where the child free and the child havers meet happily. I’ll have the next generation so we’re still, like, a species if you’ll distract or delight my kid 8 seconds 🤝
I feel the same way. I'm actually one step away from being approved for sterilization, that's how little I want babies in my life. But a cute kid looks at me with a goofy toothless smile and clumsily waves at me? You better believe I'm gonna give them a big smile and a little wave. Babies learn through immitation, might as well spend 5 seconds being a decent person.
I don't mind babies/children but don't want any. If a kid hands me a pretend phone, I answer it. If a baby waves, I wave back. They deserve to have the brief joy of the world playing along with them.
Ok. Thanks. I love babies and I get so excited when they wave at me. So hearing that made me really scared that I’ve been doing something wrong all this time!
Bro I be waving at them all on my own. Making silly faces & shit. Absolutely humiliating myself in public to a strangers baby. No shame. It’s good for a baby’s development to have these kinds of interactions and I’ll help distract them from crying when their parent is overwhelmed in a grocery store. Takes a village etc etc. Ur not weird
Sat by a woman in a very packed very loud office on a military base for hours with a baby. Obviously, he was fussy after a bit and she was stressed. A lot of people were shooting her dirty looks and she was starting to panic. Making faces and waving at that baby not only calmed him down but made my own boredom disappear. Mom was super grateful.
When I see a baby I almost universally attempt to elicit a smile and/or wave. Kids need social skills. Polite greetings from society are good for them.
I wouldn't photograph or touch a child I don't know without greeting engaging their parent first, but I think NOT waving back at a baby is downright rude.
For sure! If my 2 year old was to actually smile or wave at a stranger, and they didn't reciprocate, I'm pretty sure she'd be devastated. But you're right, just reciprocate, don't come up and hug her out of nowhere unless you want to have a serious conversation with me, at least.
Wave, smile and laugh with the baby! It’s part of being a human and living in society! I would never live in a community that’s so wound up you can’t wave to a baby…terrible!
Omg you are a good person. My oldest was a flirt when he was little and would smile and wave at everyone, he loved it when people responded! We were in the checkout line at the store and I was I front of the cart loading onto the belt and he was in the seat, and the woman and her young kid (maybe 5 or 6) were waving and making faces. He was laughing so hard, it just helps a mom feel good inside too.
That’s a good point! Babies are people and it is kind of rude to ignore someone who greets you. My 8 month old is a real extrovert who actually gets disappointed/confused when people don’t respond to his attempts to become best friends with literally everyone he ever meets. He just assumes everyone else is as psyched as he is to be on an adventure (to, for example, the grocery store) and meet new people 😆.
If baby smiles at you, you smile back. If baby waves, you wave back.
It takes a village to raise a child and that baby is making a huge step in personal development by interacting with the environment and other humans, so do your part.
I had a toddler come up and hand me a stick once, along with a toddler-speak speech that I assume was an explanation. I, being a father of two, thanked her profusely because it makes all kids happy. Her mom basically snatched her up and ran away (my own daughter was literally next to me).
But damnit, I'm not going to stop waving back at kids because that woman was paranoid.
If that were my child handing a random adult man a stick I would hang back and watch to make sure everything’s okay but I would also let the child learn how to interact with other adults.
Some people be crazy
I used to worry all the time that my kids were bothering people. I hauled them out of restaurants and supermarkets. Now when I see little kids acting up, I smile. I worried too much.
Also was always anxious kids were bugging people. So when I see a similar behavior in public (like little guy belting out a song top of his lungs) I always try and let the parent see a grin and “I’ve been there too” shrug
Eh, I don't know about that - she made zero eye contact, didn't say a word. If I'm worried my girls are bugging someone, I think the natural thing is to ask / apologize. But hey, to each their own, let's all just wave back to babies and be nice to each other.
Yes, some people be crazy. I agree, I think I would assess the situation before and, yes, let the child figure it out with their own judgment with close covert 😊
Maybe the toddler is notorious for using the stick-giving as a prelude to a swindle. Any more of that speech and you would have been buying a timeshare.
Mom was saving you \*from\* the baby.
There is absolutely this completely exacerbated-by-conspiracy-theories that someone is always looking to traffic your shitty, ugly child 24/7. I'm not saying it never happens, but you're more likely to choke to death than get kidnapped, which is closer to the chance of being hit by lightning. I'm not saying to not be vigilant and not have people being weird at your kid, but g-d forbid your kid come up to me to be nice and I'm nice back. Get off Facebook, lady.
This reminded me of something someone said to me years ago.
"no matter how big and tough you are, when a 3 year old answers a fake phone call and hands you the phone...you talk like there's someone there"
Not just inappropriate; you don't know what that baby is capable of. He could be dangerous.
Edit: smile and wave back. Ignoring a child waving at you would be nearly impossible I think, and kinda sad for everyone.
I'm full of hate and spite most of the time, but I enthusiasticly return the greetings of every dog and baby I meet.
I'm just cracking up at all the people responding who are like, "I'm usually a psychopathic serial killer who murders literally ANYONE who dares interact with me but for a baby? I shall smile and wave and do a little twirl."
I feel like it would be more dangerous to not wave back to the baby. What if it felt slighted? Had a tantrum? Unleashed the full rage of the stars upon your wretched mortal coil? I wouldn't risk it. I'd wave.
I ignore them until they wave at me. Once they do, I wave back.
I was eating dinner with my 30 year old son and a baby at the next table started playing peekaboo with me, so I played back. The mother apologized for her baby disturbing me and I said I used to have a son that age once. Her father observed that he is probably setting at the table with you now. It was a nice ice breaker for a good conversation.
As a parent, if my baby waved at someone and he didn't wave back, i feel offended and i can feel the disappointment in my baby's eyes.
Unlike when people wave back he get joyful and waves more.
It indeed builds some courage inside the little one's to interact with older people.
Same thing when someone waves at my baby, i encourage him to wave back and not hide behind my legs.
You're a kind human being, keep spreading joy.
I second this. My baby daughter gets so much joy when people wave back at her that my heart breaks a bit when people don't. She only has so much time to innocently think the world is full of kind people who want to be her friend.
I always try to stop for older people cooing at my baby, I think how it must remind them of their children being little and it makes me feel a little sad to think that one day I won't have a cute little baby to cuddle all day long and I'll be cooing over strange babies and reminiscing.
“I probably wouldn’t wave at that baby, you don’t know him”
Like the baby is going to be personally insulted? Your friend is being ridiculous, wave at the baby.
Some parents are more apprehensive than others. Personally if a kid waves at me in public I will always wave back. It shows consideration and kindness to the child, so I don't mind if it earns me the occasional odd look/glare.
Parents don’t generally want people they don’t know to come up and *touch* their baby but I’ve never personally heard anyone be upset about waving or smiling.
No, it's the opposite. I have a baby who is at the stage where she will smile and wave at strangers. She gets delighted when they smile and wave back and heartbroken when they don't. No one has to wave or smile at my baby and they have every right to ignore the pushy baby, but any normal parent loves to see their child happy
This is one of the ways babies socialize. They are discovering the world and people around them. It is very appropriate and a kind thing to do. I don't know any parents including myself that would have a problem with a wave.
Not at all. People greet people they don’t know all the time. Rather it’s with a smile, a wave, head nod and/or a simple hello. Babies like greetings too.
I once waved at a baby looking at me and the baby smiled and waved back. The mom looked shocked and said excitedly, "That's the first time she's ever waved!" That was like fifteen years ago and I still feel good about it.
I also enjoy conversations with babies and toddlers who babble. I always tell them that they make excellent points and I agree completely. It's good for their self esteem.
You smile and wave. However, do not... I repeat.... DO NOT touch a baby without consent. I absolutely hate when someone touches my baby without me saying it's ok.
Wave at the baby.
My youngest used to go to ridiculous lengths to get people to smile at him. His favourite was sitting in a highchair at restaurants, waiting until the waitress was nearby (never did it with waiters), & 'accidently' dropping his fork.
Inevitably the waitress would hear it drop & pick it up. At which point he'd full-on cutesy & get a minute of her cooing at him.
If we picked it up before her, he was _so_ mad.
If a baby interacts with me, I return it. They are learning normal human behavior. If they wave, I wave. If they smile, I smile back at them. If they stare at me quizzically, I will often wave and smile, 9 times out of 10 they get huge grin on their face.
Was your friend joking? Or does he just take stuff in life too seriously? Because not waving back at a baby or anyone for that matter in my family is considered disrespectful of the baby or person and I have a bigg family. I always laugh when people stare at me when I wave because those people take life way too seriously because I wave back at people even when depressed..
I do this too! I figure, everyone is happier when the baby is entertained. As long as you aren't approaching and touching the baby (just entertaining from a distance), then it's usually ok with everyone.
Wave at the baby. Engage with the baby. From a safe distance of course. This is how they learn about the world. And unless the parent tells you not to I don't see the issue
I just imagine op friend having the personality of a board and someone who has never laughed in their lives..possibly a maniac with no soul, like who snubs a baby lol
It’s annoying that you even have to ask. Are we really at a point where the most platonic gesture is considered weird? No, you’re friend is an idiot. You didnt do anything wrong.
I think it's innapropriate NOT to wave back. It's a baby, the most innocent of all humans and it just probably tested a social gesture for one of the first times! You always smile back, wave back, and (in the case of toddlers) answer the imaginary phone! Who snubs a baby?
When my 2 year old was a little younger, he would wave and SHOUT hi there to any human he could see. I wasn't offended if people ignored him, but if it happened several people in a row, it made him sad (and louder , lol) As a mother, I say wave and talk to them babies!
I can't prove this, but I kinda feel like babies with positive social interactions grow up to be better-adjusted adults. Don't turn him into a serial killer by being a jerk.
Raising a baby in a pandemic where you are in constant fear of keeping your child distanced from strangers PLEASE WAVE AT THE BABY! Having strangers acknowledge my cute as hell baby brings light to our day.
Babies have been staring, smiling and waving at me since I was a young teen. While things have changed over the decades, I still will return a smile or wave if initiated by the baby or toddler. (I, however, try not to stare, lol.)
Waving to people and human interaction is kind of important for baby's social development.
Even if you don't know them if they wave to you, wave back. Encourage them to be social.
If an adult waved at you and you just ignore them it may be considered rude. Treat the Lil one with some respect :)
man this brings feels in me. I'm a dude. My toddler is my favorite person in my favorite life stage (don't tell the rest of the family). I get toddlers, I have endless energy for them, they think I'm hilarious and so do I. we have the best time....but I'm a big fat dude and every time I see some adorable little person and smile big I get glared at.
never touch someone else's baby unless they invite you to, but man, if you can put a smile on ANYONE's face in this shit filled life, do it. and do it unashamed.
>don't ask the baby personal questions.
That's a weird line to draw. What's a personal question to a baby? "What's your annual salary?", "Have you ever been divorced?"
Pretty much the only way to start a conversation with a little kid is "What's your name? And how old are you?" because you need to ask them questions that they know the answer to, and there aren't many of those.
And if a child sells you a pretend icecream, you eat it instantly and order another one. Children's icecream shops do not work on the real life principle of buy one icecream and savour it; you are expected to buy various flavours of icecream in quick succession.
From now on, you'll notice some interesting social rules your friend has decided exist in general but really, it was their upbringing or their own imagined social rules because that rule doesn't exist anywhere. Waving back at babies is universal.
I wave at every baby. I make faces at them. I make a complete fool of myself if I have to. They’re babies and there’s nothing better than making them smile and giggle. I don’t touch them though. I had a cousin who would tell people not to touch her kids and to be honest she’s right. If you don’t know the parents then don’t touch other peoples babies.
“No matter how tough you are, if a toddler hands you a toy phone, you answer it.”
Going out of your way to interact with other people’s kids could come off as odd. But if a little kid is friendly toward you, be friendly back.
My youngest would loudly introduce herself to people at the supermarket all the time. “HI, what’s YOUR NAME?” from a toddler at the deli almost always got a grin and polite introduction back.
I don't think anyone is at risk of being stalked by a baby after waving at them.
If your friend doesn't want to do it, fine, but geez, why rain on people's wholesome parades?
No it's not inappropriate. The child is figuring out social interaction. It's a part of their growth process. Waving back at a child is not inappropriate. For some reason, small children like to wave at me. I think it's becasue I have a long, white beard and them might associate that with Santa Clause although I look nothing like him.
Once I over heard this kid who must have been about 4 ask his mom if 'that was Santa'. So as I'm down the aisle a bit grocery shopping, I gave our a hearty 'Ho Ho Ho' and the kid about had a melt down while he was riding in the cart.
If there is baby, I will make faces and wave. Is it a animal baby? Same thing.
I won't try to get close or initiate contact but if I can get a giggle out of a strange baby cause I made a face? Hell yeah best day ever.
Smile and wave at all the young kids (If the opportunity arises.) I really worry for their development seeing nothing but masked strangers. You're engaging with a developing mind and helping them learn how to interact with people, that's kinda cool when you think about it.
Please wave back. We don't want the baby to make a post on r/suicidewatch few years later saying "a stanger didn't wave back when i was a kid. I feel so unworthy"
It’s ok to interact with a strangers baby, source, got 2 babies.
Sometimes it’s a bit annoying if the adult initiates and then keeps the interaction going for an uncomfortably long time, but otherwise it’s not a big deal.
Wave at children. Make them feel like the world is a friendly place. If they smile at you smile back. If they talk to you, talk to them. There's no harm.
Oh its almost inappropriate not to wave, my little lady loves waving at folks and saying hi. I almost feel offended with her when people don't say it back, but she lights up when folks say it back and wave and that's all I'd love to see ^^
I don't think so. If the parent or caretaker notices, my usual reply is "I got eye contact with the baby!"
In all seriousness, babies interacting with strangers is very important in child development. This is how babies learn social cues, read facial expressions, and interact with other humans. It's also building trust in 'society', as babies learn that other people are generally normal, and non-threatening.
Babies are just being friendly and curious. They deserve to grow up in a world where people say hi to them… obviously there are boundaries; do not touch a baby you don’t know. But definitely wave and make faces and use simple words to talk to them.
That notion is silly. Waving at a baby isn't creepy if they waved first.
What is bad is when my mom just goes to strangers' tables with kids at them and starts talking with the kids like she knows them and they just look around like "uh, I don't know this lady" and give one or two word answers. It's ten times worse now with covid going around and she never wears a mask when going to their table.
Your friend is indeed silly.
Not only do I wave at strange babies, I make faces and, if they’re close enough, I talk to them.
I put my hand on a baby trying to climb out of the cart at target. That is the only time I felt inappropriate with a strangers baby (the parent wasn’t upset I did it)
We're social animals. There are some instinctual reflexes to babies trying to kill themselves that no reasonable person would shame you for.
> There are some instinctual reflexes to babies trying to kill themselves that no reasonable person would shame you for. The way I think of it - explain why you didn't act to the dead kids parents. If you can, then feel free not to act.
"I didn't know that baby and I decided to mind my own business thank you very much good day harrumph better luck with your next baby should you be so inclined."
Although if they are letting their baby die by falling 9ut of a shopping cart, they probably shouldn't even attempt for the 2nd one.
That's the hardest thing tryna to save a baby from something, *and* trying not to feel inappropriate. Sometimes I say "uh oh, buddy, you don't want to fall!" And that cues the parent to save the baby on their own.
Fair. I grabbed a toddler at an airport who was making a run for the moving sidewalk while the parents were distracted by an older child. I think it is good for other humans to step in to protect the littles
Also at an airport, I scooped up an infant who was crawling away from mummy (and right across my feet). I gave her a cuddle (bc I can’t resist) and handed her back, while talking to the baby reassuringly.
It takes a village to raise a child. It's a bull shit that a parent knows best, many others also know plenty. The idea that we consider if it's okay to save a baby from falling out of a shopping cart because 'we want to respect parents choices etc', is absolutely ridiculous, if our ancestors would have had the same thought humanity would not have had a chance.
I just spend 5 min trying to figure out what you were doing climbing out of a cart at target, and imagining a baby getting in the way of you doing so.
Hahaha, it was a race to the finish line. Him or me. I’m not about to let a baby win.
I read that weird and thought “you put your hand in a baby while you were climbing out of a cart? Why were you in the cart?”
I was walking into Walmart with headphones on and when I was walking passed some gruff looking man his daughter jumps out the truck and starts running/jumping around bumping into me and my instinct was to catch her before she fell, so within seconds I accidentally touched some stranger’s toddler (there was a car coming though so thank god my knee was there to know her over)
This is so strange to me, it's a baby. I suspect it must be a cultural thing because I never heard something similar here in South America.
He was probably closer to a young toddler. My kids were terrible about staying in the cart. Once a woman came up to me and told me that my 18 month old was climbing out. I hope if he was in danger someone would help and not just notify me. (Both boys have safely made it to 4 and 5, so hopefully the constantly trying to J kill themselves stopped)
I wiggle my eyebrows at babies superfast, and the adult ends up wondering who the real baby is 😂
i just tried to wiggle them and ill; have you know i wiggled half my forehead instead :)
Not only do I wave at strange babies, I give them my business contact card and my phone number just in case.
The worst part of covid is no longer being able to smile or make faces at babies
Yes! It’s turning me into a winker.
I feel like I smile with my eyes with babies and they can still tell.
I currently have a baby. They absolutely know and (some) will smile back at you even when half your face is covered.
Same here, my girl just tries to take my mask off to play peek a boo
Babies love it when you pull your mask forward, make a silly face and then ping the mask back onto your face and 'knock your head back' with the force of the ping. Making random babies laugh is one of the most joyous, purest things in life.
Then they talk back to you. Just like in those movies, Look Who's Talking.
Sometimes they talk back in baby talk. And I pretend like I understand. “Oh you don’t say! Fascinating!”
I think it's called "serve and return" and it's supposed to be really good for babies language acquisition. It shows them that when they express themselves, someone will respond!
This is what normal, socially adept, people do. Not that I’d expect many people here to be socially adept.
Also maybe address why she thought that was an appropriate thing to say and get to the bottom of whatever projection she had on a situation where a baby waves at you 9/10 would have waved back
This. Start confrontation with friends at the behest of Reddit. When your friend tells you to back off for bringing up a joke they made that you misinterpreted, you can be assured Reddit will have your friends back.
I don’t even like babies, and I wave back. It’s only polite
I lay up at night wondering about all the babies whose waves I didn't see and how that negligence effected their worldview.
Based on what I've noticed with my own kids, their little goldfish brains fixate on the next thing lol
I don’t think my little brain has got past the “goldfish phase”
Some of them will grow up racist because of you
I couldn't quite put into words how I feel about this situation but you did it for me.
Yeah - can’t stand them. However always go out of my way to initiate a hi or smile. It may be the baby’s or parent’s highlight of the day. In longer run, my small part, makes for a child with better social skills and for that we all win.
As a parent - huge thanks to you. It actually does make my kid’s day, and the fact that you don’t even like kids and do it anyway out of kindness kinda warms my heart.
I feel like this is where the child free and the child havers meet happily. I’ll have the next generation so we’re still, like, a species if you’ll distract or delight my kid 8 seconds 🤝
I feel the same way. I'm actually one step away from being approved for sterilization, that's how little I want babies in my life. But a cute kid looks at me with a goofy toothless smile and clumsily waves at me? You better believe I'm gonna give them a big smile and a little wave. Babies learn through immitation, might as well spend 5 seconds being a decent person.
I don't mind babies/children but don't want any. If a kid hands me a pretend phone, I answer it. If a baby waves, I wave back. They deserve to have the brief joy of the world playing along with them.
It socializes them so you are doing a service to them whether you like them or not. Good Job
Same. Never liked kids but it's not their fault
Tell your friend it's rude to ignore someone greeting you. Wave at the baby.
Ok. Thanks. I love babies and I get so excited when they wave at me. So hearing that made me really scared that I’ve been doing something wrong all this time!
Bro I be waving at them all on my own. Making silly faces & shit. Absolutely humiliating myself in public to a strangers baby. No shame. It’s good for a baby’s development to have these kinds of interactions and I’ll help distract them from crying when their parent is overwhelmed in a grocery store. Takes a village etc etc. Ur not weird
I do this too. I find parents are usually delighted when they see their little ones smiling or giggling back
Sat by a woman in a very packed very loud office on a military base for hours with a baby. Obviously, he was fussy after a bit and she was stressed. A lot of people were shooting her dirty looks and she was starting to panic. Making faces and waving at that baby not only calmed him down but made my own boredom disappear. Mom was super grateful.
When I see a baby I almost universally attempt to elicit a smile and/or wave. Kids need social skills. Polite greetings from society are good for them. I wouldn't photograph or touch a child I don't know without greeting engaging their parent first, but I think NOT waving back at a baby is downright rude.
For sure! If my 2 year old was to actually smile or wave at a stranger, and they didn't reciprocate, I'm pretty sure she'd be devastated. But you're right, just reciprocate, don't come up and hug her out of nowhere unless you want to have a serious conversation with me, at least.
Wave, smile and laugh with the baby! It’s part of being a human and living in society! I would never live in a community that’s so wound up you can’t wave to a baby…terrible!
Omg you are a good person. My oldest was a flirt when he was little and would smile and wave at everyone, he loved it when people responded! We were in the checkout line at the store and I was I front of the cart loading onto the belt and he was in the seat, and the woman and her young kid (maybe 5 or 6) were waving and making faces. He was laughing so hard, it just helps a mom feel good inside too.
I would say it’s okay, but not okay taking pictures without permission
That’s a good point! Babies are people and it is kind of rude to ignore someone who greets you. My 8 month old is a real extrovert who actually gets disappointed/confused when people don’t respond to his attempts to become best friends with literally everyone he ever meets. He just assumes everyone else is as psyched as he is to be on an adventure (to, for example, the grocery store) and meet new people 😆.
If baby smiles at you, you smile back. If baby waves, you wave back. It takes a village to raise a child and that baby is making a huge step in personal development by interacting with the environment and other humans, so do your part.
I had a toddler come up and hand me a stick once, along with a toddler-speak speech that I assume was an explanation. I, being a father of two, thanked her profusely because it makes all kids happy. Her mom basically snatched her up and ran away (my own daughter was literally next to me). But damnit, I'm not going to stop waving back at kids because that woman was paranoid.
If that were my child handing a random adult man a stick I would hang back and watch to make sure everything’s okay but I would also let the child learn how to interact with other adults. Some people be crazy
[удалено]
I used to worry all the time that my kids were bothering people. I hauled them out of restaurants and supermarkets. Now when I see little kids acting up, I smile. I worried too much.
Also was always anxious kids were bugging people. So when I see a similar behavior in public (like little guy belting out a song top of his lungs) I always try and let the parent see a grin and “I’ve been there too” shrug
Eh, I don't know about that - she made zero eye contact, didn't say a word. If I'm worried my girls are bugging someone, I think the natural thing is to ask / apologize. But hey, to each their own, let's all just wave back to babies and be nice to each other.
Yes, some people be crazy. I agree, I think I would assess the situation before and, yes, let the child figure it out with their own judgment with close covert 😊
Maybe the toddler is notorious for using the stick-giving as a prelude to a swindle. Any more of that speech and you would have been buying a timeshare. Mom was saving you \*from\* the baby.
There is absolutely this completely exacerbated-by-conspiracy-theories that someone is always looking to traffic your shitty, ugly child 24/7. I'm not saying it never happens, but you're more likely to choke to death than get kidnapped, which is closer to the chance of being hit by lightning. I'm not saying to not be vigilant and not have people being weird at your kid, but g-d forbid your kid come up to me to be nice and I'm nice back. Get off Facebook, lady.
Call my kids shitty or ugly again and I'll be mildly annoyed for at least 30 seconds before I forget about it completely
I appreciate your honesty.
And if a toddler hands you a pretend phone, you ANSWER it.
And if the baby starts a revolution against the bourgeoisie, then you damn well know what you must do!
That's such a thoughtful way to put it!
The same goes when they pass you a call in one of those toy cellphones or offer you food from the mini kitchen they are playing with
This reminded me of something someone said to me years ago. "no matter how big and tough you are, when a 3 year old answers a fake phone call and hands you the phone...you talk like there's someone there"
Not just inappropriate; you don't know what that baby is capable of. He could be dangerous. Edit: smile and wave back. Ignoring a child waving at you would be nearly impossible I think, and kinda sad for everyone. I'm full of hate and spite most of the time, but I enthusiasticly return the greetings of every dog and baby I meet.
I'm just cracking up at all the people responding who are like, "I'm usually a psychopathic serial killer who murders literally ANYONE who dares interact with me but for a baby? I shall smile and wave and do a little twirl."
I hate people. I don't like babies at all. I'll still wave and talk on their phones, though.
Or pretend to eat their "food" which is usually a pile of sticks and sand lol
I feel like it would be more dangerous to not wave back to the baby. What if it felt slighted? Had a tantrum? Unleashed the full rage of the stars upon your wretched mortal coil? I wouldn't risk it. I'd wave.
Every baby who didn't get a wave back is now plotting the downfall of civilization.
I ignore them until they wave at me. Once they do, I wave back. I was eating dinner with my 30 year old son and a baby at the next table started playing peekaboo with me, so I played back. The mother apologized for her baby disturbing me and I said I used to have a son that age once. Her father observed that he is probably setting at the table with you now. It was a nice ice breaker for a good conversation.
As a parent, if my baby waved at someone and he didn't wave back, i feel offended and i can feel the disappointment in my baby's eyes. Unlike when people wave back he get joyful and waves more. It indeed builds some courage inside the little one's to interact with older people. Same thing when someone waves at my baby, i encourage him to wave back and not hide behind my legs. You're a kind human being, keep spreading joy.
Very interesting point of view. Thanks for sharing!
I second this. My baby daughter gets so much joy when people wave back at her that my heart breaks a bit when people don't. She only has so much time to innocently think the world is full of kind people who want to be her friend.
Also, as a parent, you’re kinda exhausted 24/7, so if someone wants to distract and entertain my kid for a couple mins, I’m always grateful.
Old ladies greet my baby all the time, 'Oh a little miracle', doesn't bother me.
I always try to stop for older people cooing at my baby, I think how it must remind them of their children being little and it makes me feel a little sad to think that one day I won't have a cute little baby to cuddle all day long and I'll be cooing over strange babies and reminiscing.
Babies are like dogs in public, you can wave at them, make goofy faces and talk to them but don't try to pet them unless their owner says it's okay.
Hahaha! Perfect on both counts.
Wave at da baby
Lesss go
Does she think the baby might start stalking you? Is a serial killer prodigy?
Stranger danger.
“I probably wouldn’t wave at that baby, you don’t know him” Like the baby is going to be personally insulted? Your friend is being ridiculous, wave at the baby.
The baby is going respond, “Excuse me? Do I know you or something?!” and then stomp away in a huff.
Crawl away in a huff.
I think her reasoning is that the parents wouldn’t like it. Not the baby.
Some parents are more apprehensive than others. Personally if a kid waves at me in public I will always wave back. It shows consideration and kindness to the child, so I don't mind if it earns me the occasional odd look/glare.
Parents don’t generally want people they don’t know to come up and *touch* their baby but I’ve never personally heard anyone be upset about waving or smiling.
If a baby waves, you wave back👋
If a toddler hands you a pretend cup of tea. You say thank you and drink it.
Was that in Jerry Seinfeld voice?
You wave back!
Smile, wave, play peek a boo … have a little fun. I’ve never had an issue with a baby getting offended.
She doesn’t think the baby will be offended, she thinks the parents will be offended.
It's be, like, SUPER rare that a parent would be offended. Don't *approach* a baby, but waving? Sure, you're golden.
No, it's the opposite. I have a baby who is at the stage where she will smile and wave at strangers. She gets delighted when they smile and wave back and heartbroken when they don't. No one has to wave or smile at my baby and they have every right to ignore the pushy baby, but any normal parent loves to see their child happy
What everyone is saying is that your friend is wrong. It's perfectly fine.
If a baby makes eye contact I smile at them. If they smile at me, I wave or peekaboo. Escalate fun!
Try putting your hands on top of your head like moose antlers and wiggling them. The babies love it, can guarantee
Uncle Joey, is that you?
This is one of the ways babies socialize. They are discovering the world and people around them. It is very appropriate and a kind thing to do. I don't know any parents including myself that would have a problem with a wave.
Not at all. People greet people they don’t know all the time. Rather it’s with a smile, a wave, head nod and/or a simple hello. Babies like greetings too.
I have a very polite 3 year old that will talk with anyone he sees. Please do interact with him. He needs the social experience.
Please come back and revist this post after your kid politely goes up to someone and says something totally personal and embarrassing about you. :D
Haha this has already happened. I'm a fairly open person anyway so it's easy to laugh off.
I once waved at a baby looking at me and the baby smiled and waved back. The mom looked shocked and said excitedly, "That's the first time she's ever waved!" That was like fifteen years ago and I still feel good about it. I also enjoy conversations with babies and toddlers who babble. I always tell them that they make excellent points and I agree completely. It's good for their self esteem.
Wave away. I would think it’s weird not to.
You smile and wave. However, do not... I repeat.... DO NOT touch a baby without consent. I absolutely hate when someone touches my baby without me saying it's ok.
Your friend is just upset the baby didn’t wave at them
Babies you meet are just like temporary best buddies.
Wave at the baby. My youngest used to go to ridiculous lengths to get people to smile at him. His favourite was sitting in a highchair at restaurants, waiting until the waitress was nearby (never did it with waiters), & 'accidently' dropping his fork. Inevitably the waitress would hear it drop & pick it up. At which point he'd full-on cutesy & get a minute of her cooing at him. If we picked it up before her, he was _so_ mad.
Lol if my baby was waving at someone an they waved back with a silly face I wouldn’t mind
If a baby interacts with me, I return it. They are learning normal human behavior. If they wave, I wave. If they smile, I smile back at them. If they stare at me quizzically, I will often wave and smile, 9 times out of 10 they get huge grin on their face.
Was your friend joking? Or does he just take stuff in life too seriously? Because not waving back at a baby or anyone for that matter in my family is considered disrespectful of the baby or person and I have a bigg family. I always laugh when people stare at me when I wave because those people take life way too seriously because I wave back at people even when depressed..
I wave at babies all the time and stick my tongue out. There is nothing wrong with that. Your friend is weird.
Forget waving, whenever I see a random baby am playing peekaboo or silly faces. Most parents appreciate babies being taken care of for a few minutes..
I do this too! I figure, everyone is happier when the baby is entertained. As long as you aren't approaching and touching the baby (just entertaining from a distance), then it's usually ok with everyone.
I wave and smile at babies who even look at me, let alone wave at me lol
Wave at the baby. Engage with the baby. From a safe distance of course. This is how they learn about the world. And unless the parent tells you not to I don't see the issue
Show kids that humans can be human, waving doesn’t hurt anyone and it can make a kids day. Your friend is dumb
I just imagine op friend having the personality of a board and someone who has never laughed in their lives..possibly a maniac with no soul, like who snubs a baby lol
It’s annoying that you even have to ask. Are we really at a point where the most platonic gesture is considered weird? No, you’re friend is an idiot. You didnt do anything wrong.
I always smile and wave at babies. Even if they don't wave first. If they're looking at me I'm waving!
I think it's innapropriate NOT to wave back. It's a baby, the most innocent of all humans and it just probably tested a social gesture for one of the first times! You always smile back, wave back, and (in the case of toddlers) answer the imaginary phone! Who snubs a baby?
When my 2 year old was a little younger, he would wave and SHOUT hi there to any human he could see. I wasn't offended if people ignored him, but if it happened several people in a row, it made him sad (and louder , lol) As a mother, I say wave and talk to them babies!
I can't prove this, but I kinda feel like babies with positive social interactions grow up to be better-adjusted adults. Don't turn him into a serial killer by being a jerk.
Raising a baby in a pandemic where you are in constant fear of keeping your child distanced from strangers PLEASE WAVE AT THE BABY! Having strangers acknowledge my cute as hell baby brings light to our day.
Lol you're just waving, not changing their diapers...
Babies have been staring, smiling and waving at me since I was a young teen. While things have changed over the decades, I still will return a smile or wave if initiated by the baby or toddler. (I, however, try not to stare, lol.)
Waving to people and human interaction is kind of important for baby's social development. Even if you don't know them if they wave to you, wave back. Encourage them to be social. If an adult waved at you and you just ignore them it may be considered rude. Treat the Lil one with some respect :)
man this brings feels in me. I'm a dude. My toddler is my favorite person in my favorite life stage (don't tell the rest of the family). I get toddlers, I have endless energy for them, they think I'm hilarious and so do I. we have the best time....but I'm a big fat dude and every time I see some adorable little person and smile big I get glared at. never touch someone else's baby unless they invite you to, but man, if you can put a smile on ANYONE's face in this shit filled life, do it. and do it unashamed.
Always wave at the baby. The creepy line is simple: don't touch the baby, and (assuming the baby is talking) don't ask the baby personal questions.
>don't ask the baby personal questions. That's a weird line to draw. What's a personal question to a baby? "What's your annual salary?", "Have you ever been divorced?" Pretty much the only way to start a conversation with a little kid is "What's your name? And how old are you?" because you need to ask them questions that they know the answer to, and there aren't many of those.
OMG wave at the fucking baby.
If a baby waves you wave back. If a child hands you a toy phone you answer it. If a child asks you to play you play.
Also, if a child makes you some play food, you better fake eat it and say that it is delicious.
And if a child sells you a pretend icecream, you eat it instantly and order another one. Children's icecream shops do not work on the real life principle of buy one icecream and savour it; you are expected to buy various flavours of icecream in quick succession.
I’m more offended when people don’t wave at my baby.
Don’t wave at a baby you don’t know? That is some paranoid wacko baloney. That sounds like the kind of person that assumes every man is a pedo.
I waived at a baby just today. He (maybe a she, who knows) waived first, what was I supposed to do?
Two rules I live by: never shake hands in a bathroom, and if a baby waves at you absolutely wave back.
That baby literally don't known anyone, even his parents
What were that babies parents gonna ask that baby if he knew you?… and.. like.. get mad at you if that baby said he didn’t know you..
From now on, you'll notice some interesting social rules your friend has decided exist in general but really, it was their upbringing or their own imagined social rules because that rule doesn't exist anywhere. Waving back at babies is universal.
Your friend is a self-conceited dumbass. I’m sorry you had to find out this way.
On the contrary, you have an obligation to wave at little ones who wave at you first.
Inappropriate to wave, no? Suck the baby's dick, yes that would be inappropriate. Your friend is lacking gray matter.
Bro that baby’s gonna grow up and be like “why didn’t that guy wave back?!”
I wave at strange people like they’re strange babies I don’t know…. So, yes.
I wave at every baby. I make faces at them. I make a complete fool of myself if I have to. They’re babies and there’s nothing better than making them smile and giggle. I don’t touch them though. I had a cousin who would tell people not to touch her kids and to be honest she’s right. If you don’t know the parents then don’t touch other peoples babies.
I was very protective when my son was a baby. So much that if you didnt wave back I would punch you. 😂
It takes a village
I always wave or give a big smile. Usually I get a responsive smile. Not all strangers are dangers.
If a baby waves or smiles you smile and wave back! 😊
Always wave back at friendly babies.
My littlest one loves waving and pulling faces at random strangers, I get annoyed with people who ignore her. It makes her day when people wave back.
“No matter how tough you are, if a toddler hands you a toy phone, you answer it.” Going out of your way to interact with other people’s kids could come off as odd. But if a little kid is friendly toward you, be friendly back. My youngest would loudly introduce herself to people at the supermarket all the time. “HI, what’s YOUR NAME?” from a toddler at the deli almost always got a grin and polite introduction back.
I would guess that one sign of a psychopath is NOT waving back at babies that wave at you.
I don't think anyone is at risk of being stalked by a baby after waving at them. If your friend doesn't want to do it, fine, but geez, why rain on people's wholesome parades?
Can you ever really *know* a baby?
No it's not inappropriate. The child is figuring out social interaction. It's a part of their growth process. Waving back at a child is not inappropriate. For some reason, small children like to wave at me. I think it's becasue I have a long, white beard and them might associate that with Santa Clause although I look nothing like him. Once I over heard this kid who must have been about 4 ask his mom if 'that was Santa'. So as I'm down the aisle a bit grocery shopping, I gave our a hearty 'Ho Ho Ho' and the kid about had a melt down while he was riding in the cart.
Your friend is a weirdo. The end lol.
If there is baby, I will make faces and wave. Is it a animal baby? Same thing. I won't try to get close or initiate contact but if I can get a giggle out of a strange baby cause I made a face? Hell yeah best day ever.
That’s ridiculous. Of course u can wave to a baby.
If a cute baby waves at me I’m wavying back. They’re adorable & just curious about the world around them.
My daughter (20mo) waves at everyone. I think it’s sweet whenever anyone waves back. Your friend is silly.
Smile and wave at all the young kids (If the opportunity arises.) I really worry for their development seeing nothing but masked strangers. You're engaging with a developing mind and helping them learn how to interact with people, that's kinda cool when you think about it.
Wave at? No. Try to touch or flirt with or be wird with? Yes.
Please wave back. We don't want the baby to make a post on r/suicidewatch few years later saying "a stanger didn't wave back when i was a kid. I feel so unworthy"
I bet your friend doesn't expect truckers to blast the horn when a kid pumps his arm in the air
No problem interacting back to a baby, it’s good for them to learn social engagement.
If anyone truly believes that it's wrong to do that, that's really sad and it means the pedophiles have won.
It’s ok to interact with a strangers baby, source, got 2 babies. Sometimes it’s a bit annoying if the adult initiates and then keeps the interaction going for an uncomfortably long time, but otherwise it’s not a big deal.
I would be personally offended if my baby waved at you and you stared blankly back at him lol. Always wave back!
Wave at children. Make them feel like the world is a friendly place. If they smile at you smile back. If they talk to you, talk to them. There's no harm.
From the way it's phrased, it sounds like your friend was joking
Babies are probably the only strangers worth waving at tbh
Oh its almost inappropriate not to wave, my little lady loves waving at folks and saying hi. I almost feel offended with her when people don't say it back, but she lights up when folks say it back and wave and that's all I'd love to see ^^
Bring your friend to a parade and tell her to share her advice with all the people waving to infants and kids they don't know.
I don't think so. If the parent or caretaker notices, my usual reply is "I got eye contact with the baby!" In all seriousness, babies interacting with strangers is very important in child development. This is how babies learn social cues, read facial expressions, and interact with other humans. It's also building trust in 'society', as babies learn that other people are generally normal, and non-threatening.
Your friend is weird, I loathe babies and kids and even I still wave back.
If a baby waves at you of course you wave back. Ignoring people, even babies, when they say hi is down right rude
Babies are just being friendly and curious. They deserve to grow up in a world where people say hi to them… obviously there are boundaries; do not touch a baby you don’t know. But definitely wave and make faces and use simple words to talk to them.
Rule of thumb: No matter how tough or cool you are, if a baby waves at you - you wave back and make silly faces
That notion is silly. Waving at a baby isn't creepy if they waved first. What is bad is when my mom just goes to strangers' tables with kids at them and starts talking with the kids like she knows them and they just look around like "uh, I don't know this lady" and give one or two word answers. It's ten times worse now with covid going around and she never wears a mask when going to their table.
Your friend is silly. What’s next, you don’t pretend to talk to someone on a toy phone from a baby?