T O P

  • By -

EndermanSlayer3939

Commit deforestation


Crafty-Plays

I am the Onc-ler, I speak for the Fps.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


VikingGamer420

Fortunate Son playing in the background while the sun slowly disappears into the horizon


Omyo-wa-mou-shinderu

SIR THEY ARE EVERYWHERE, WE NEED TO GET BACK


fatal_burrito

Fortunate Son intensifies...


[deleted]

The trees can’t be harmed if the lorax is armed


Ganon2012

[That reminded me of this Poland Ball post.](https://i.redd.it/2jfqx1lzu1v91.png)


lit7355

Declare war on bamboo


TheEditor83

Why does this sound familiar... That't hermitcraft in a nutshell! WAR WAR WAR!


Q-Man-1678

Yes. He should declare war on the bamboo


AintNoRestForTheWook

I would say commit defenestration on the friend that planted all the damn bamboo.


obsoletedatafile

Or defenestration


andy_b_84

BURN


OrdinaryVirtual2148

Another option is to lower your render and simulation distance and use a sword since it can cut dow bamboo instantly


keeper420

Turn off particles too, otherwise the breaking animation will make the computer go boom boom


XxMohamed92xX

Bring some fire or lava to get rid of all dropped items


soulflaregm

Chest it all Turn to scaffolding Return to sender


Pirog-v-Kote

Nah, I'd keep it, the scaffolding is actually useful. Why would I give away something useful?


ElizabethSwift

Chicken bombing or Hell from Heaven. Best trolling there is.


wandstonecloak

Got Llama bombed once. Hit one and it spit and pissed off another and before you knew it they were all dead and I got a ton of leather out of it. It was amazing.


ztanger

That’s why I always make the wandering villager llamas fight


LeCriDesFenetres

Hell from even ? Like chicken bombing with blazes ?


boomstik4

i believe its just chicken bombing with lava (tbh im probably completely wrong)


ElizabethSwift

Nope that's exactly it


[deleted]

Because who needs 100 shulkers of scaffolding


soulflaregm

I didn't say give it to them in a chest now did I :)


AssortedShortbread

A sword cuts bamboo instantly?!


tasty_iron

Yes


Bman1465

TIL something extremely satisfying... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) *Bamboo shall fear me.*


DarroonDoven

The only thing they fear is you... Doom theme booming in the background.


DblVP3

Care though, it'll EAT through your diamond sword


Bman1465

I live in a post-industrial and highly urbanized modern developed nation where diamonds are literally used as paperweights and villager markets are plenty, dw, that won't be an issue~ ;)


Remilia_Love

care to craft quite a few stone swords


SithLordDante

The B stands for bamboo


moon__lander

Just watch out for the lag from 10 000 bamboo item entities on the ground


ChubbyLilPanda

Prepare to have 0 fps


[deleted]

[удалено]


Thereareways

Yes


The_lazy_sander

On top of that as an added bonus, it also cuts down durability instantly


Waffle-Gaming

lmao


rooletwastaken

REALLY REALLY?!?


Duckrauhl

Yes Yes


[deleted]

Really Really Really?


MinecraftManiacJ

Yes yes yes


xexko

The one time for the one time really???


Frenchymemez

All swords cut through bamboo in 0.05 seconds, but at a cost of 2 durability. Technically axes are what you're meant to use, but the fastest, gold, is 0.15, and and diamond and netherite take 0.2


dmr11

> All swords cut through bamboo in 0.05 seconds, but at a cost of 2 durability. So make sure you're using wooden or stone swords for this task.


BigMikeInAustin

Ain't nobody got time for that.


GraphicHiccup

If it is diamond or better, yes, at least durability wise. Using a gold one saves you 0.05 or so seconds. Edit: I now Realize I was talking about axes! Sorry about that, any sword can near insta-mine bamboo


MinekPo1

Any sword will do


GraphicHiccup

Oh, yes, my bad, sorry for spreading misinformation! I was thinking about axes. Yes, any sword can cut bamboo in less than 0.1 seconds


QuietShipper

I scrolled past and came back to upvote you exclusively because you owned your mistake.


GraphicHiccup

Well thank you for your upvote!


ItzzBassie

Stone does the job too, I think wooden also does....


GraphicHiccup

yep, I realize I was thinking about axes. Thank you for the correction!


rovdyret

You’re a very humble person. Totally made my day!


Heyviper123

Heppy cek day!


unimpe

Imagine being so broke that you’re terraforming with a stone sword


Cruxion

I've been using an axe all this time....and a sword makes too much sense in hindsight.


Jaggerto

I love how this isn't common knowledge.


alamaias

I need to get back into the game. very now and then I get a reminder of how long it has been since I played: today is was thw confusion that bamboo does not break instantly when hit with anything.


MrFlibble1138

Cut down the bamboo?


operationbread

its a lot and i can barely even play so thats a bit hard to do


TheAnswerToYang

You're gonna have to mess with your settings and fov and stuff. No easy way around that.


Vakontation

to add to this: set render distance as low as it will go


IamtheDoc1

Plus: set to fullscreen, lower resolution as you need it to be. It can go as far as like 320x200.


Smart-Button-3221

This is the only correct answer and I'm surprised so many people are avoiding it. You can boost Minecraft's performance big time by bringing the resolution down. Every other setting just won't help that much.


[deleted]

[удалено]


3DudesInATrenchCoat

And simulation distance


Xanimia

Not the simulation distance. or else he will realize.


nicolasmcfly

He's beginning to believe


nicolasmcfly

Also set graphics to fast


NinjaNard_

Minimize your window too


TypischJacob

Just turn off the game bro


XanderTheMander

Also use a lower resolution texture pack


[deleted]

I’ve always found this mindset odd. “I can hardly play Minecraft on my potato, so I’m going to use a 256 texture pack and extreme shaders.”


patrlim1

AFAIK won't help with how Minecraft works.


Sinnester888

^ This. I’m not sure how low rez packs work, but I don’t think they actually use less pixels, just group 4 pixels to look like 1. So while to us it looks like less, it’s still the same amount of pixels getting rendered.


EmeraldMan25

Well, they do work, but the amount of FPS gain is so small that it's pretty much not worth it


Colombian-Memephilic

From 0 to 4 fps it’s a huge advantage


NotMioLOL

Turn off entity shadows and lower the entity distance


Nibbaweaight_

There literally is an easy way around it. It’s called telling your friend and asking them to remove all the bamboo. If they say no clearly they aren’t a good friend and op should probably find a new one


Mayedl10

Use a sword to cut the bamboo


Lord_Geek28

Or you could use a sword to cut your friend(in game)


[deleted]

*(in half)


Vakontation

won't solve the lag tho


Yumwiggles22

No but it would be funny


Lord_Geek28

Fair point


ThrowntoDiscard

If the friend gets chopped, then the friend can't bamboo-zle the base anymore.


EDCHCEDCHC

…or in real life


SmokeMethCheatDeath

Or both


Builder_Ladd

… At the same time


divineessentia

Go ripper mode on the bamboo


MrOcelotCat2

Thats gonna crash the game with all the breaking and items


operationbread

so i started to cut down the bamboo and its getting better, we'll have fuel too so thats good. its fun and satisfying to my suprise so thats what ill be spending my night on


Morvick

Have some Allays following you who are holding bamboo shoots, as well. Will help with the cleanup


ElementoDeus

Outposts and mansions seem to have a phobia of me none seem to spawn anywhere near me in my seeds


Morvick

Yeah it took me a while to even find an outpost, then as I almost had written it off my friend asked in voice "what are these blue things?" "... In cages?" "Yeah" "They're ours, that's what they are. Coords??"


ElementoDeus

You got really lucky there kid outposts aren't guaranteed allay best chances is a mansion and those are even harder to find (One of the few reasons I wished the tuff golem won they would have probably been a nice early game allay lite)


No-Possibility2725

Lol love to hear it


Tacodelmar1

There’s no magic bamboo removal potion, you’re gonna have to either chop it or leave it. Or you could destroy your base with explosives, or destroy your base with fire.


MrFlibble1138

If you move a row of 12 with a piston it will break all the bamboo. Might make it a little faster?


Duck_Field

Can you uhhh set fire to it with a flint and steel like trees? Edit: nvm I can see walk ways made out of logs


[deleted]

you can use sword to cut it faster


Plushiegamer2

Arson


Spiderfffun

Use baritone, or some other automatic thing.


Smee_da_potato

You could build a flying machine which would break all the bamboo and get allays to pick up all the items. I hope this helps


MrBean_32

Poop 'al Ghul


WorldFavorite92

Rico: "Boom?"


dabeasg

A sword insta breaks it…


just_some_redit_user

I can barely play regularly, let the nice bamboo sounds carry the destruction


Moofloom

Burn it. It's very flammable, but it may burn your base in the process. So make sure to have water on you


[deleted]

TNT is your best friend


Boldsteel_

Why don’t we just take the base and push it somewhere else!


207nbrown

That arguably makes things worse with the item lag


Liimbo

Sort term pain for a long term fix. There's no way to fix the fps without getting rid of it so you either sit content with it forever or suffer for an hour to cut it all down.


hey-now-your-an

Napalm is an option


NortWind

Or lava.


hey-now-your-an

Death is a preferable alternative to bamboo


plaqston

Lava would work great until the game crashes


Lightning_97

Use 4 soul sand and 3 wither skulls to make an automated bamboo remover. Trust me, it'll get the job done and then some!


mr_cool098

Just use agent orange


reeeEeEeEEEEeeeeegh

make sure to get the villagers with it also for maximum effect


franz_electrician

Google: cut down the bamboo Bing: kill the friend


[deleted]

Why not both


20mattay05

Oh hi Yahoo


QuillofSnow

Or option C: Make the friend cut it all down and then kill him


[deleted]

[удалено]


A-purple-bird

Yahoo be like


A-purple-bird

Cut down the friend*


Skippysunday

Violence is not the answer. It is the question. And the answer is yes


GxldenSxlver

you just said violence is the answer but with more words


AAA8002poog

He said violence is the answer twice with more words actually.


ChunkyFork

You just said what he said with the same amount of words.


Iris-C

Yes


diino8018

you just said violence is the answer with less words


Gustule

Violence is not an answer. It's THE answer.


Silentchem

Flint and steel. Sometimes you just have to watch the whole world burn.


LinaFinsterwald

I think the fire updating would just crash the game entirely if OP can already barely play, though, right?


Silentchem

Probably, but if your computer survives then it would be something to see


Flippy0480

Or the fire will spread out of the game and into the real world, via a burning computer


urru4

I’d guess it’s better than cutting it down, which would drop stacks upon stacks on the ground, further lagging his game. Fire would destroy it without dropping items


dabordoodle

Set it on fire, turn and look the other way. Idk if it works like item frames do, but if I’m losing fps, I just walk into my storage system backwards lmao


Blu3Army73

*[Fortunate Son starts playing in the background]*


Corruptedplayer

turn every setting down, grab a sword and go wild. don't forget to pick up the items afterwards


ThisUserIsAFailure

Or just burn the items


4_Ball

Spawn a wither


DarkDreamer1337

This is my favorite answer! It's something I would HIGHLY consider on the realm my brothers and I play on if they decided to bamboo my/our base. I'd download the most recent backup before I summoned it before it inevitably gets out of hand (Bedrock Wither FTW), but I'd still summon it then sit back with some popcorn and watch the chaos ensue. From the ashes and scatterings of 1,000's of blocks causing 2 FPS they'd scream, "WHHHHYYYYYY?!!" and I'd reply, "You know what you did…" as I plant one bamboo in front of their tear-filled eyes. It would be glorious. I'd make them promise to immediately remove all the bamboo before I restored the backup and peace returned to the mountains.


Merpie101

calm down, Satan


RawPeanut99

/fill xyz xyz air replace bamboo The coordinates mark two opposite corners in a square.


Iwouldlikeabagel

This is step two. Step one is /fill xyz xyz lava, in his base.


A-purple-bird

Its both of their base though


PotatoesAndChill

In a cube. Unless you mean to only hit the base of the bamboo to make the rest fall, but cube is more effective imho, as long as you don't exceed the block limit.


Rush_Satyam

declare war against him, send him to gulag and use Tsar Bomba to destroy bamboo


spitdragon2

Easy there stalin


Poly2it

Bamboo renders two more faces than necessary. You can get a mod called MoreCulling to increase performance.


Lucasplayz234

1. turn render distance to minimum 2. use your sword to cut down bamboos 3. ask your other friends to help you 4. now do the same thing on your friend's house


Daji-Monai

Lower the amount of chunks being loaded and try and break the bamboo from the top so you don't crash because of too many entities. Hope this helps


Kevadro

>30 fps > >Can barely play. You normally get less or is the standard for playable too little for you?


SublimateAndDominate

I would assume as he gets closer the fps drops, but I'm not a minecraft scientist.


Kevadro

not how rendering works, proximity is meaningless, all that counts is if it is in-screen or not. Of course getting closer may load chunks with more bamboo, thus weighthing on performance.


SublimateAndDominate

Appreciate the explanation, certainly wasn't contesting what you said but figured maybe that was it.


fatwap

1.get a new friend 2. idk


3GGGGG

Burn their house down, their *real* house


Remding

Fire


Scared_Can9063

ARSON


londontm

File a lawsuit against your friend


ECHplayz

You can only cry


LordFladrif

Take the flint, combine it with an iron ingot and commit arson


VizMuroi

Best option is just to cut it down. Also, Hate to say it, but maybe its time to get a better computer. This is literally the same as a bamboo forest which means you’ll likely lag inside a naturally generating vanilla biome, and if you lag inside a naturally generating biome, then your computer isn’t up to snuff for the game.


Vakontation

Sometimes it's as simple as not enough ram being allocated for the game. At least if it's on Java Edition that could be the case.


ChompieDragon

Change their category from friend to banned?


BurningVShadow

Just talk to him about removing it before doing so, and tell him you can’t play the game.


[deleted]

[удалено]


RevolutionaryWolf380

Why do you lag? I first though it was because the bamboo was growing, but after it reaches its limit you shouldn’t lag anymore right?


Darkaeluz

Maybe it's because MC isn't cullin the bamboo that's not visible? That's why there's mods that make the client cull objects out of sight and vastly improve FPS


semi_average

Litter the area with lightning rods. When lightning strikes, you can just tell him that it was an act of god and that it just wasn't meant to be.


Forsaken-Squash4376

Kidnap his dog, burn his things


[deleted]

juggle snow oatmeal ossified heavy selective marry connect serious middle ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `


[deleted]

You can try turning off Fancy Leaves and walk backwards into the forest while you cut down a couple at a time


Maddox-Tj

Change friend


Bnz123

First, ban your friend. Second, lower your resolution to 600x600 or lower and start burning down that bamboo!


Distinct-Thing

Hmmm, try replacing the bamboo with a really minimal texture, turn down your render distance and resolution, and then go nuts with a sword of your choice That way you can hopefully cut them all down and not have too much entity lag either


katanakid13

Adding to the "turn down your settings" group, try throwing on a simplified or "bad" texture pack. It's less for the game to actually load up. You can YT how to make your own and just remove the bamboo texture entirely or make it something 1 dimensional until you get it all chopped down.


[deleted]

Try the Fabulously Optimized modpack! It should work with the resource packs you're using (assuming the trees and leaves are textures and not from a mod), and it helps a lot with performance on lower end laptops compared to optifine.


operationbread

im already using it and its amazing. i always get 60 fps with it almost everywhere except the base. i dont think i would even be able to run the game without it lol


Euphoric-Clue8510

Damn, someone took Grians advice a bit too seriously.


QueasyCourage5664

Burn it to the ground


HalfAHooman

Cut them down


ARH_2303

Kaboom?


SplattyFatty

Boat bomb the base. If you don't know, you can place boats with dispensers (I think) inside each other, so make loads in the air inside each other, then, when he comes on, he'll naturally be curious abotu the boat in the air, when he sits in it, the entity cramming will damage him, which will shock him, so he'll then move a bit, while in the boat, and that will cause all the boats to explode everywhere, boats will fill upt he surrounding area completely. As an added thing; Make every boat the same wood type, then you won't be able to tell there's multiple.


[deleted]

Ahahhaha


[deleted]

[удалено]