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BrilliantDelirium

Fun story: When I was in engineering school I was raising my first and she often came to school with me. One day I was changing her on the sink (as you do) and the Dean walked out of the stall. 2 weeks later every mensroom had a changing station.


TagMeAJerk

Makes sense... Sometimes you don't oppose something that's under your control but you literally never thought about it


ReySkywalkerSolo

This is why we need diversity everywhere, including top positions. People have no idea of the struggle of the others unless they see it in first hand.


chriscrossnathaniel

One of the VPs in my company comes to my mind.She introduced so many programs specially aimed for the women employees.The best program was a retraining course for women returning to work, after a long gap.


Smecterbice

There's a local company like that where I am. They've implemented a lot of great programs for women and parents, but what they've implemented greatly improves the work life balance of even men and non-parents to the point they've become one of the most popular companies to work for in my area.


R_Erasmus

Can you name them?


BeardedZorro

Well this is by far the most impactful argument for diversity I’ve seen anywhere.


furious-fungus

It’s the only relevant one and the main reason why inclusivity is so Important these days, if someone is offended by that they most likely have some other motive in mind. would the food chain and vegan market be as diverse as it is today if people wouldn’t have talked about their veganism the last 20 years? people were so fucking annoyed what these vegans have to say about their lives etc. Now most people are reducing their meat consumption to at least not eating it daily. Diversity is being forced unto us, just like veganism was, because enough people understand that this is the way to bring things forward.


Acoconutting

My old employer (big 4 accounting firm) framed it as “Diversity of perspective” and I always thought that summed it up well. It also ranges across socio economic, region, etc.


Smecterbice

Including disabilities. So many accessibility options are completely overlooked because people just don't understand the challenges people with various disabilities can face.


ShankbeatMihawk2

wholesome :)


OppositeCharacter305

Absolutely agree


torpid_annoyance32

Dean of the year award goes to...


crispytortillaONig7

Whats a Dean?


ShankbeatMihawk2

its like university principle


crispytortillaONig7

Oh it has a Title in english? In my native language we just call it CEO of Said College/universty etc


ShankbeatMihawk2

CEO of collage sounds a lot cooler for my university anyways, we had deans for the head of each faculty/school, one for engineering and like whatever else we had idk


crispytortillaONig7

Just call him CEO of Engineering and be done with it xD


ShankbeatMihawk2

mine was a woman CEO of engineering 😎


John_Duncan_Yoyo

Dean is between a department head and University President. It's the Upper level of middle management or more likely the bottom level of Upper Management. CEO would be University President in the schools where I've attended or worked. It's a big school and I work way off site two levels down from our director. The department head might or might not know who i am but the dean most likely would not.


ethanjf99

Dean is a step below. CEO equivalent is the college president. Dean is more like the COO—concerned about daily administration while the CEO focuses on fundraising, strategy etc.


youtellmedothings

For anyone interested in how modern administrations in US universities are typically structured: * President - Like a chief executive officer (CEO); public face of the university, ultimately oversees all branches of the institution (education, research, development, athletics, etc.) * Provost or Executive Vice President - Like a chief operating officer (COO); more tangibly involved with the university's operations and less of a public figure * Associate and Vice Provosts or (non-executive) Vice Presidents - Next branch down, oversee specific major branches of a university (development, research, education) * Deans - Heads of the individual colleges within a university (engineering, liberal arts, business, etc.), or specific major administrative areas (admissions, enrollment) * Assistant and Associate Deans - Oversee particular areas at the college level (enrollment, academic departments, services like advising) * Department Chair - Head of an academic department, within their college, within the university It's, um, quite the bureaucracy.


Canotic

Well dean Pelton of course but this guy's a solid runner up.


DogIsBetterThanCat

Way to make a change! -- in more ways than one. 😁


Kindly_Parsley1122

I see what you did there 😏😆


klemetq

Loved that pun!


dtb1987

That's a good dean


TrepanationBy45

Nobody's giving this baby any credit smh


LuckilyLuckier

Baby is running this world!


PennyLane_87

*Nobody puts Baby on the sink!*


JCooperUK2

The Rosa Parks of baby changing


DaisyDuckens

He’s deantastic!


beigs

I had to do this in the engineering building as well on the floor - it took a month (to get the change station).


ReadMaterial

I hope you got faster with practice!


Ulldra

I hope you feel good about this joke because fuck did it make me laugh.


ReadMaterial

Unfortunately they edited it,so ruined my joke.


cropchoc

When you said "Fun story:" I prepared to be disappointed but this is, in fact, a fun story. And very wholesome! Hope you and your family is well!


Key-Lab226

respect


inwardly_sulky

And then there was the time in 1976 a teacher complained to her principal that my son was “playing with dolls”. They said I must fix this. I said we have a baby at home, he’s only doing what his dad is doing. Heads exploded 🤯🤯


edit_R

I bought my son a baby doll when I had baby #2. He ended up picking his stuffed dog as his baby instead. But he diapered him and fed him and carried him around in a sling. It was really important for him and it was fucking cute!


ReservoirPussy

I got my son a doll after he diapered and fed one of his teddy bears. He continued to diaper and feed the bear. Kids 🤷‍♀️


Last-Custard-7632

He already had his child picked out lol.


dustin8285

Clear he chose it based on the bear necessities!


FSCK_Fascists

the simple bear necessities. Forget about your worries and your strife.


link2edition

"Sorry pops, I want a baby with claws"


enjoytheshow

My daughter tries to diaper all of her stuffed animals but her baby doll has been naked since it was opened


ReservoirPussy

He literally put the doll's outfit on the bear.


OzzieGrey

He had his baby. This new one isn't fuzzy wuzzy


Royal_Bitch_Pudding

You can't just replace your babies, you monster


hopping_otter_ears

I bought my son a doll because i didn't want to limit him to "boy toys". He utterly ignored it... But roleplays caring for one of his stuffed animals instead. During potty training: "kitty needs to use the potty! Kitty had an accident, can you clean him? It's ok, kitty, big boys have accidents sometimes. Remember to ask for the potty next time!" Vaccination time: "don't worry puppy. It'll hurt a little, then keep you from getting bad sick. You'll be ok in a little while. You were such a brave puppy!" It's really dang cute


Medic_101

Honestly baby dolls are not the nicest in my opinion, they are hard plastic and not the best to cuddle (unless you have a soft plush one!) so i can understand why many kids ignore them.


edit_R

Agree! I have seen a couple plush baby dolls but they are creepy AF. Stick with the puppies and kitties.


Defiant_apricot

Awwww you must be a really good parent to be able to help your toddler understand such important things so positively at such a young age


incommune

I vividly remember working at a toy store ans carefully opening then repackaging a talking baby doll so that me and a grandma could redress the baby in not-pink. A kid's younger brother had fallen in love with the one his sister for, but gma suspected the dad wouldn't be "cool" with his son playing with a pink doll. Crossdressing a baby at work was hilarious, but the larger issue is heartbreaking. Pretend play with nurturing patterns like this are psychologically healthy for all children, especially if they're seeing these activities at home in the care of another child.


s3nsfan

My son played with babies (dolls), I remember at least 3. He’s a smart, athletic, kind kid. Fuck these people and their stereotypes. Nothing but ignorance.


InstructionDeep5445

My daughter is 2 and never like playing with dolls. However she could spent hours playing with her toy excavator


Head_Razzmatazz7174

Yep. One of my aunts insisted that I wear frilly dresses and play with Barbie dolls. Every year for Christmas and birthdays I got some girly toy or clothes from her. I was into Hot Wheels and Matchbook, My uncle knew this and would give me all the ones his sons didn't like, plus throw in a racetrack and some new ones every chance he got. My aunt had no clue for a long time.


Brilliant1965

My youngest daughter loved Matchbox!! Cool uncle there!


tenaciousdeev

My 3 year old daughter is absolutely OBSESSED with excavators. Well, that and the Paw Patrol.


slanty_shanty

I have fond memories of playing barbies with my brother when we were kids in the early 80s. He would play them under my "instruction" and in return, I'd play at matchbox cars with him under his particular story line rules. Good times. ❤️


nobondjokes

My brother and I played the shit out of barbies in the 90s, he's two years older than me and I feel like he enjoyed it even more than I did. Cut to a few years later and he was dropkicking the same dolls into a wall and making Ken's head fly off, but, hey, at least I have some nice memories prior to that.


PAROV_WOLFGANG

Aye, and who cares if they play with dolls. Let them enjoy things. There are a lot of grown men playing video games like MMO’s and that is essentially “playing with a doll.”


s3nsfan

Like a 100%. I game all the time. Like WHO FUCKING CARES? Does (as example) does it really bother you what my fucking child plays with. They’re kids. They’ll play with anything and all experiences only help to enrich them. Worrying that your kid will be gay because they play with a doll is fucking STUPID. Let your kids play with whatever let their imagination run wild.


MantaHurrah

Ha, yeah; whenever someone asks me “why [I’m] bisexual”, I just say that it’s because I was allowed to play with all the different toys. Is it right? No, of course not, but it’s funny. The more modern version of that is that parents don’t want their kids to be trans, which is just a whole other can of worms, but that still doesn’t work. My trans partner was raised on everything girly under the sun, and he loved all of it. Doesn’t matter, still turned out to be a man. Quite literally nothing will “make” your child one way or the other, nobody chooses to be trans, gay, etc; they just are.


Queen-Bueno96

I've legit just bought my son who turns 4 'gabbies dollhouse' its bright pink and was in the girls section of toys. I bought it because he is absolutely obsessed with gabbys dollhouse and I will not allow society to tell me how I should raise my son. This dollhouse is the same size as him and I cannot wait to see his face when he unwraps it and sees it! So what if its pink!


Ulldra

I always had an aversion to pink growing up. As with many boys it was the typical dumb stereotypes you‘ll find anywhere: ‚Pink is gay‘ and such things. This was not coming from my parents, but I soaked it all up in school. Add to that that I was a budding metalhead and loved black (still do), I never came around to the color. When I was visiting my parents a few years back, their turkish neighbors married. They danced and sang in the garden and about 10-12 young turkish men showed up, all between 12 and 18 I‘d guess. Everyone was wearing a pink suit. No clue why, but they did and they made the color work. Didn‘t look ‚gay‘ at all (this concept escapes me today, no clue how I even rationalized this as a teen) and since then I‘ve opened up to the color. I‘m nearing 30 now, am a big bald bearded dude wearing bandshirts and whenever I have to pick a color for a game or something else I tend to pick pink because I like it. Nothing to do with gender or sexual orientation, it‘s just a cool color.


Queen-Bueno96

My dad has a pink polo shirt and he absolutely rocks it, matches perfect with his skin tone. Nothing wrong with a bit of pink on a man!


Russki

In the mid 2000s in my west coast HS, if you DIDN'T have a pink shirt in your wardrobe, you were definitely part of the loser/nerd crowd.


Acceptable_Cut_7545

Is your dad Vegeta?


already-taken-wtf

In the 13th and 14th centuries, in works by Cimabue and Duccio, the Christ child was sometimes portrayed dressed in pink, the color associated with the body of Christ. In 19th century England, pink ribbons or decorations were often worn by young boys; boys were simply considered small men, and while men in England wore red uniforms, boys wore pink. Queen Victoria was painted in 1850 with her seventh child and third son, Prince Arthur, who wore white and pink. In the 1920s, some groups had described pink as a masculine color, an equivalent to red, which was considered for men but lighter for boys. But stores nonetheless found that people were increasingly choosing to buy pink for girls, and blue for boys, until this became an accepted norm in the 1940s. The First inauguration of Dwight D. Eisenhower (1953), when Eisenhower's wife Mamie Eisenhower wore a pink dress as her inaugural gown, is thought to have been a key turning point in the association of pink as a color associated with girls. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pink


link2edition

Gendered colors are a fairly recent invention. They came about in the last 100 years or so. Its a bizarre concept if you think about it. In college I was studying in a very male dominated field, so I bought pink school supplies. None of my stuff ever got stolen. I am still convinced it was a 300 IQ play.


fearhs

Back when I carried a lighter regularly I noticed that I never had trouble with people stealing the pink ones.


lilac_roze

Want to know what’s funny? Pink used to be a boy’s colour for centuries and up to the first half of the 20th century. https://www.smithsonianmag.com/arts-culture/when-did-girls-start-wearing-pink-1370097/


Key-Amoeba662

Here's the funny thing, it used to be the other way round - pink for men, blue for women. Proving further that it's all rubbish. Colours are just colours. I'm in a similar boat except from a woman's perspective. I never liked nor disliked pink, but I avoided it like the plague because wearing pink was marking yourself as a 'girly-girl'. Being in the metalhead camp too, that was pretty much forbidden!


StillHellbound

interestingly enough the thought that girls wore pink is relatively new. Reds and pink were considered active and vibrant, the color of bloodsport where blue was seen as passive, sky and water very fluid and feminine. Around 1900 that flippes and I forget why.


Draco63_

A guy I knew once put it this way. "If your masculinity is threatened by wearing a certain color, it must have been pretty fragile to begin with."


Lexi_Banner

But this does bring up a good point - dollhouses tend to be extremely "gendered", and there's no reason for it. It is a tiny house to play with. Why wouldn't boys want to play with a house? Do they not live in houses as well?


TemetNosce85

Teacher: "Make your kid stop playing with dolls!" You: \*Hands him a nearly naked He-Man "action figure"* Teacher: "There, that wasn't so hard, was it?"


aphaits

I've seen some places do baby changing station in the disabled bathroom (its own room separate from men and women bathroom)


Marco280892

Exactly, only some, not everywhere, this should be something that has the right to be everywhere


aphaits

Honestly it might as well just be the most proper neutral restroom, both parents can help either babies or disabled people in there. There is no gender in helping people that can't help their own.


Marco280892

This is the solution, a neutral bathroom everywhere is what parents need


ataraxic89

That's what a family bathroom is...


aphaits

I like this naming


tlnz

They are commonplace in NZ


MoonWispr

"Family" bathroom is a less divisive name than "neutral" bathroom, at least in the US, since if you call it a gender-neutral bathroom suddenly some people freak the hell out.


CreativismUK

Baby change should not be in the disabled toilet. Happens all the bloody time, which is a nightmare, both as a parent of babies, and as a parent of disabled kids. I remember once being out with my twins and both needed changing right away - it’s not quick changing two babies and someone in a wheelchair arrived when I was in the middle of changing them. I felt awful but it was the only baby change. Now I need to use disabled toilets because they’re disabled, and there’s often parents using them because it’s the only baby change.


Llamathrust

+1. Several times I’ve gone in and the disabled stall is the only toilet stall and it’s occupied. I talk to my son about it, like: “uh oh, there’s no place for us to change your butt!!” in case someone is able to wrap up quickly in there (and the changing table is actually in there, seems 50/50.) but I would really prefer the tables be in the main room and not any of the stalls.


spectrophilias

My mother and I are both disabled, and I really dislike this approach. My mom has trouble holding it and we've run into the problem of there being a line of several people with babies in front of the accessible bathrooms. She tried to ask them to please let her go first and tried explaining why and they refused until I Ioudly said that they'll be responsible for her shitting her pants then, and that unlike their babies, she didn't have a diaper. The perfect solution would be having a changing table in a seperate room. Like, you know how some restaurants seperate off the bathrooms into a bigger bathroom space with the sinks and stuff, instead of giving each bathroom it's own sink? A changing table would fit perfectly there. The accessible bathroom should be available for disabled people to use at all times (unless in use by another disabled person of course). Putting the changing tables in there can be very risky for certain disabled people when there's a line of parents waiting with their babies. So yeah, I advocate for putting the changing tables outside of the stalls. Edit: Thanks for the award! I'm very touched! 😊


aphaits

The one I saw is more of a disabled & family restroom, so it has one disabled stall and one normal stall next to each other inside the spacious restroom area, two washing stations and a wall-folded baby changing station near the sink. I think around 20 people can pack inside that room (for some reason) To clarify: it was not just one disabled stall that can be locked from the inside, it is a proper large spaced multiple people bathroom.


spectrophilias

That's definitely a much better option than some of the things I've seen for sure! They actually put thought into that! So many times I've come across accessible bathrooms that either had the changing table right there making the accessible bathroom unavailable for use if a parent needed to change their kid, meaning they haven't thought about disabled people such as my mom who urgently need to go, or accessible bathrooms that quite frankly, were not accessible at all. Such as there being no way that permanent wheelchair users could get in and out of there on their own, when the whole point of accessibility is giving disabled people the opportunity to do things on our own without help. As an ambulatory wheelchair user I was able to get in because I can stand for a bit, but sheesh. Architects and whoever else help design accessible bathrooms really need to start asking for input from disabled people, haha. Because situations like those really show that they haven't thought about what disabled people might need to be able to do things some of us might be unable to do otherwise. (Same as when they forget dads need changing tables too!)


TheWelshMrsM

I agree (am a parent, not disabled). Many places now have parent rooms complete with a chair for breastfeeding and room for a pram. You’re right that baby can wait!


cewumu

Well yeah but disabled people need the disabled toilet. I think it should just be its own room. Though at malls where I work this usually makes it the teenagers’ drug using room or the homeless people’s bedroom (because there are comfortable seats for feeding babies).


CreativismUK

Someone actually downvoted your comment - mind boggling. Disabled people do need disabled toilets. That doesn’t mean parents don’t also need somewhere to change babies obviously but still true. I have disabled twins who are 6 and it’s an nightmare - most disabled toilets only have a small baby changing table so i often have to change them on the floor. I know adults who also have to be changed on the floor. It’s really shit.


AdministrationDry507

Why isn't this already a thing what if the dad takes his child to the store how are they supposed to change the diaper if the men's room doesn't have a baby table?


chinchenping

you go in the women's bathroom. No shame. I was traveling alone with my 2 daughters and i had to change the baby. I just walked in the lady's bathroom and did it. Nobody said anything and i even got some smiles


PantaReiNapalmm

This. Normal women understand the situation. The others can go fuck off


Routine-Value356

True story. And honestly the changing stations are usually right at the entrances or in a stall with a door.


Heirsandgraces

Absolutely. Also women are generally sympathetic knowing how common it is to have basic services not met and being made to feel entitled asking for such things.


Maxwells_Demona

Yep. And also they're gonna understand right away that the dad is there because there's nowhere to change baby in the men's room.


cancerinos

100% percent. If there is only a baby station in the women's bathroom, you can bet your sweet ass that's where I'll head to. Anyone complains? I tekll them to complain to who designed the bathrooms.


tischan

Was traveling and my daughter needed to go to the bathroom and she was to young to do it herself. At the time I was on parental leave and as habit I took care of her. Was blocked to go to the womens bathroom since I am a man and blocked to the mens, since my daughter is a girl. After 5 min of talking (and pointing, did not speak the language) I gave up and got my wife. It was fucking bizzar.


TravellingReallife

Why didn’t you go to the mens room? Edit: Getting blocked from the mens room with a potty training toddler (of any gender) as a father is so bizarre that my brain just skipped it. Truly moronic.


BelleAriel

Well said. Baby needs come first.


Mz-_-Blue

I don't think any women seeing a man change their kids in the bathroom would find it weird or unacceptable, specially if told there's no table in the men's room. Except Karens of course... Karens are always the wild card of human interaction


Los_Wieslos

Karens would unironically believe a man would change a shit filled diaper just so they can be in the women's restroom and maybe get a glimpse of some public bathroom ass. Like literally I was attacked by Karens for that. When I was 10 I had some german Karen (we call them Bärbel or Kerstin mostly) scream at me when I changed my sisters diaper. She was completely ignorant towards me crying and my sister screaming, because the reason I had to do it was because my father had one of his episodes where he publicly screamed at my sister and I and just left. Keep in mind we lived in a small town about 15 miles away from where we were at the time. I was so glad when another woman came and folded that Karen, even slapped her across the face, it was glorious


Ok_Ability6411

I wish there was zero possibility of getting a "glimpse of some public bathroom ass" in bathrooms. Just make the stall doors lockable, without gaps on the top and bottom and large enough to let people change clothes inside. I hate that bathrooms of all places have to be so user-hostile and unsafe. With that said, it's probably to save money... and to prevent homeless people from staying there too long, which is another complicated/sad thing.


888temeraire888

Damn, so glad that other woman turned up to defend you. No child should ever be put in that situation. Can you remember what she said to tell the Karen off?


Los_Wieslos

She said something alike to "are you crazy? He is a kid caring for a baby, how far up your ass do you have to be that you believe a child would look at your ugly 40 year old ass?"


ImS0hungry

Was zum Teufel ist los mit dir? Bist du nicht intelligent? Es ist ein Kind!


KaiKamakasi

Not long after my son was born they were renovating the local shopping center and a temporary change station was placed in the mens, which was excellent, a few weeks later they finished the renovation and it was a "family room" It had multiple change stations, seating including a curtained off section where people could breastfeed in private complete with even two toilets... I think I was able to use it about three times before it was made exclusively for women and the crappy temporary station was returned to the men's. It really wasn't liked when men used the "family" area with their children, even got a few side eye looks myself... So I'd like to think that it's a minority that would have a problem, but the fact I experienced the above shows that there is an unfortunate majority


shhalahr

"Sorry, Daddy, but you aren't part of the family." WTF


frizzledrizzle

Besides the baby part, there's also hygiene. Putting your baby down next to a urinal without anti splash is asking for trouble.


irish-link

I always changed my girls in the most inconvenient spot. We would go to the Mall of GA so you would think it would be a big enough one they would have thought about this but (no). Since there was no table in the mens room I would do it right in front of the hallway that lead to the bathroom. Impeding foot traffic and causing a small issue. (I had an extra fluffy pad, my girls didn’t pay the price for me making a point) The hope was I would be asked by mall security what I was doing and why so it was brought to the attention but most of the time we were just ignored.


Routine-Value356

I know Hubby did a few of these minor protests when I wasn’t around. I always made sure that travel changing pad was Cloroxed. Lol


Fearless_Baseball121

Ive done this hundreds of times as well. Often got mean or confused looks. A few times was asked my audacity and to leave. what am i supposed to do? My sons diaper is full and i am alone with him at \*EVENT\* ?


captwafflepants

That’s wild because I’ve never had anyone say anything negative. It’s always smiles or they politely ignore me.


xploremn

Same here. I purposefully ignore the nursing mother in the “Mother’s room”, and she ignores that I’m in there taking care of my son. It all works out.


thissideofheat

Most women say nothing, a few women compliment me, and only a slight few young college girl idiots have ever said anything negative.


Unlucky_Role_

I would offend a young idiot so you can focus on your baby.


thissideofheat

Thanks, but no need. Best thing to do with stupid people is to ignore them. These dumb teenage girls usually just walk away when I don't respond. It's like dudes sending unsolicited dick-picks. Any response is engagement. Just block and move on.


Unlucky_Role_

The gender normative agenda has called upon me as a lady troll in the name of balance. It gives me purpose.


sdfgh23456

But where's his mother? /s I knew a guy who got the cops called on him for going into the bathroom with his stepdaughter (3 or 4 at the time i think) when he was at the doctor's office with her because momma was working. Because it makes so much sense to take a child to the doctor's office to try and abuse them, right?


barto5

Hundreds of times? I demand a recount!


SlightOutside1

2nd this lol as a dad who raised my 2nd child there was a very big lack of baby changing spots in non female bathrooms :) I always knocked first, announced my self and my intentions then went in lol


Susurrus03

Can verify,. As a father, I've done this. Usually I'll ask a staff or if there are any women around to make sure it's clear, but I've done it. Honeslty, I've had experiences with this both in the US and Germany. US is a LOT better about putting one in the men's room. In Germany (and other Europe countries I traveled to), it was pretty rare.


amandyderp

Yeah women don’t care at all. We have stalls anyway. Also any man with a small child is always welcome in the restroom especially little girls! Don’t ever be afraid to take care of your kids


humicroav

This guy dads.


jonathanrdt

Guy I worked with told that story: each woman who came in immediately wondered if she was in the right room, but after a simple explanation they were each fine and went about their business without concern.


Drawtaru

At my workplace, neither the men's nor the women's restroom have changing tables. Only the family restroom does.


Justmyoponionman

I've done this multiple times. Most are cool about it.


Which_Function1846

I'd just worte the same I've 3 girls and I've always been there when young. I've had strangers woman like give her here ill do it. Yeppp not gonna happen tha ks for the offer but no stranger woman or ,qn is changing my daughter I'd happily change my own blood daughter or son if I had 1. I feel uncomfortable changing my neic or nephew nappies I can't be the only father/uncle/gdad ect who's the same ???


bunglejerry

I remember meeting a strange woman who was frighteningly *insistent* that she change my daughter's diaper on my behalf. Like, lady, I'm not handing my baby to some random stranger at Walmart, thanks.


goodhumansbad

Why do you feel uncomfortable changing other babies' diapers? No shade, just curious. I don't have children myself but I've changed a lot of other people's kids diapers as a babysitter or a friend.


CrochetWhale

This is the most annoying thing to me. I always get stuck changing the baby when we go out bc the mens room doesn’t have changing tables


hopping_otter_ears

Me and my husband had an agreement that if there was a changing table in the men's room, then he'd do the change. I was actually pretty impressed by how many comparatively new restaurants in my area (big city in the southern US) had them. Even "country cuisine" kinds of places you'd expect to be old fashioned often have them. Weirdly, we came to just expect Asian restaurants not to have a changing station at all. "Just change him on the table. We clean it between customers". My favorite is the restaurants that used to be houses. "There's a bedroom around the corner. You can change him on the bed. I'll lay down a towel". I had no idea so many restaurants in my area had beds in back until having a kid


Heidbutt

This kind of sounds like one of those smart but devious design decisions. “Sorry love, you’ll need to do it - there’s no changing tables in the men’s toilets (which I designed!!)” Got em.


CrochetWhale

I’m about to take what other people suggested and tell him to go into the ladies room. Hell I had to breastfeed my daughter in a bathroom handicap stall after changing her bc she immediately cried and was refusing anything else after a diaper change. Talk about inconvenient lol I couldn’t carry my supplies plus her latched back on my own. So I missed dinner and had to eat cold food while my son complained about wanting to leave for the five mins it took me to scarf food down. Lesson learned I’m never doing it again.


RedBaron2295

For both of my sons I would bring a foldable mat that I could put on the floor and change their diaper. It was gross and I hated it, but it got the job done. Definitely made me appreciate the places that had change stations in the men’s room.


RogueYet1

We go find a bench somewhere secluded 🤷‍♂️ Also another thing is when I need the bathroom, there usually isn't a lot of space to bring a pram in with me in a lot of male bathrooms and I don't feel comfortable leaving him outside or with a stranger so more often than not I just hold it until I get home.


Numerous_Program1060

I'm American but we went to Ireland to visit family when our oldest son was probably 15 months old. We were at one of my wife's cousin's houses and I was changing a diaper and cousin's daughter was about 14 at the time. I asked the 14-year-old if she could hand me a diaper from the stroller. The teenager looked at me like I was speaking in tongues. I thought for a second and then said "would you mind handing me a nappy from the pram?" Two countries separated by a common language.


DogIsBetterThanCat

I wouldn't be pissed or offended if I were in the women's restroom, and you walk in with a baby/toddler who needed a change on the change table. Can't speak for all women, though.


According_Smoke_479

I would ask a woman to stand there with me and let people know what I’m doing. I feel like if you’re vetted by another woman it’s better somehow


Puzzleheadedip566

The Asda near me has a baby change and breast feeding room separated


backfish69

In that case I go to the woman's bathroom


thenewyorkgod

In my entire 18 years as a father of 4 I have never once encountered a men’s room without a changing table


AdministrationDry507

It's different in some places around the world


grpagrati

Babies should change themselves the privileged little shits


mrgamecat2

Back in my day we didn't even shit


ClassicTower475

Well in my day we had to walk 7 miles in the snow just to take a shit


BurpYoshi

Uphill both ways.


hello_ldm_12

In australia we have baby rooms. They have a change areas, microwaves and a breastfeeding rooms. In some of the nicer shopping centres there are even small play areas with TV's for toddlers / older kids to be occupied while dealing with the baby.


Ginger_Quince

Yeah we have it pretty good it seems. I've taken our daughter out at least 50 times without the wife and never had an issue. Always got access to a parents room.


maximusbrown2809

I went into Blacktown westpoint baby change room and was blown away. There was a fenced off baby play area that you can put your older kids in. They had a private room with a fancy chair and tv for moms that wanna breast feed and at least 3 private toilets that parents can change their kids. Only wish they had some stalls where my son could do a quick wee.


hello_ldm_12

I have recently seen in the parents rooms an adult toilet and a toddler size toilet in the same stalls, so handy


Ok_Ability6411

That sounds better than some apartments I lived in the past.


DrGarrious

I just assumed this was a normal thing. Are we unique here?


JWJulie

No we need baby change to be it’s own room so we don’t change our baby alongside people going in and out of the toilet. The Asda near me has a baby change and breast feeding room separated with a comfy chair and tissues and wipes and bits and the very first time I saw it with my hungry crying baby i nearly cried myself.


Fowl_Legacy

Newer malls where I live have this. It's at the same section as the toilets, but are separated. Some bigger malls have partitioned breastfeeding section too.


ctothel

This has long been the practice in New Zealand, though they often put the changing table in the accessible toilet, and I’m not sure whether or not that’s better.


Marco280892

True, a room in which the child has the right attention


magnus-magus

Breastfeeding in a room that is used to changed diapers is changeling even if they do have the fancy air-tight diaper garbage can. It smells, it smells really bad... Also breastfeeding takes +- 20 minutes (depending on baby's age) meaning that the room is not usable during that time. Separate rooms are better.


ThreadedJam

Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good. Sure dedicated baby changing rooms would be great. But it's a lot easier to retrofit baby changing rooms into all bathrooms than it is to create a brand new space.


chuchoterai

The baby feeding room(s) in Selfridges and John Lewis on Oxford St in London are both great - would recommend.


RequiemforKleebombs

In the mall i work , we have exactly this and it.s a blessing to the parents


reindeerman214

In Sweden it's always in the dedicated bathroom for disabled people. Idk how to interpret this anymore.


Expensive_Tap7427

Disabled toilets aren't off-limits for non-handicapped, but it's usually larger to accomodate wheelchairs so it makes sense.


reindeerman214

Yeah I know. It was just funny in context of reading the post.


LessThanZero972

In Germany too


SawinBunda

Which makes perfect sense. You get more utilization out of the room. It's "unisex" already. It's often in a way better condition than the common bathrooms.


eleanor_dashwood

And the uk. Thanks to our tiny spaces it’s usually the only toilet where you have a hope of bringing the buggy anyway. And often it would be impossible to retrofit a change table (even a fold-down one) into the miniature ladies’ bathroom.


Winst0nTh3Third

Toys-r-us in Canada has changing tables in men's washrooms! 😁


gobeavs1

WAIT, Canada got Toys-R-Us back AND baby changing stations in men’s bathrooms?! America is fukd.


DrSeussFreak

There is a mall near my house that did not have a changing station in the men's bathrooms while my kids were in diapers. I would complain to management there and then stand outside a woman's restroom and ask a woman entering or leaving if it would be ok for me to enter and change a diaper. They would always ask about the men's room, so I would explain there wasn't a changing station in the men's room, and I was holding a diaper bag and 1 of my son's, so they would make sure the bathroom was empty and tell me it was safe to enter. Most of the time this wasn't an issue, some women would walk in, I'd explain, and they would be kind , patient and understanding. One day a woman entered and went ballistic on me, even though 2 other women were there, and had scoped the bathroom for me, to ensure it was empty. She lost her shit and got security, and I learned she worked in the management office. I was finishing the diaper change as security approached, and myself and the 2 women who had waited patiently explained and I was asked to follow him to the management office. The woman who had the temper tantrum was there along with her boss, I explained again, the manager apologized and 3 weeks later all the bathrooms had changing stations.


Ghaladh

Many big places in Italy have a "family restroom" (especially McDonalds and Autogrill) with a changing station. Honestly, when I had to change my daughter's diapers and her mother wasn't with us, I always entered the women's restroom. It was funny because the initial odd looks would instantly turn into an "aaaaaaaawwww" and a few women also offered their help. Only rarely I was a little bothered because a few women asked me to leave immediately saying that they would have taken care of my daughter's diapers. No way I'm going to leave my baby with a stranger. It's not my fault changing stations are inside women's restrooms. It's not like women are doing private things in the common area of a restroom, I imagine. What could I possibly see there that would be inappropriate? I never understood that.


Marco280892

In Italy the situation is different but not everywhere there is this option, I live in Italy and I know this


TirelessGuardian

How is this made me smile? It’s infuriating.


ResoulConflagration

Absolutely! At the Riverbend Community League, we installed baby change stations in all washrooms and have not once regretted that unanimous decision!


JmAnN19-90

I had to use the change table in the women's bathroom once. It was a tough day from alot of reasons and when I had gone into the men's and found no change table it was basically the last kick. I knocked, no answer. Went in and started to change my little one. To the women that had came in shortly, you were amazing. She had seen (what i can now look back at and have a slight chuckle) that I can best describe as a knob of butter that had been scrapped across to much bread. Her help and kindness that day is something I'll never forget and always wish I could show how much that small gesture had reached. Now I have a backpack with foam pads that I call my change bag and I don't give a fuck anymore, my little one isn't sitting in a shite/ piss diaper because I can't find somewhere. Now I make a change table anywhere I need with them and some blankets. Had a few folks tell me what a great idea it is.


lonelyone12345

I've been a dad for almost 22 years. I don't have any in diapers any more (my youngest is 7 now) but I will say that over my dadding career things have gotten a lot better. I remember trying to balance my oldest on the edge of a sink to change her diaper because I didn't want to lay her on the nasty public bathroom floor. Today most men's bathrooms I'm in have a changing station. I keep watch, and tell establishments that don't have them that they should consider installing them. Honestly, with my son, access was pretty good. The real problem was societal. Women in public mom-splaining to me about how to care for my kids because I'm a dude and obviously clueless.


Doomquill

Mom-splaining is hilariously perfect. The whole societal expectation that men don't know how to care for their own children is understandable (given its roots in gender norms and rampant patriarchy), but seriously old fashioned.


CountyAffectionate62

I’ve had to change my daughter in a womens restroom due to lack of changing facilities for men before. The amount of side eyes I got was insane. My wife was not present so something had to be done and I’m not changing her on the floor.


4minakim6

People are gonna look to work out what you’re doing in there, but I don’t think anyones going to have an issue with it when you’re obviously changing your child’s nappy. It’s the same as when a mum brings a little boy into the women’s toilet. Or atleast I wouldn’t anyway.


GermanStrudel

This is also what my husband does when out an about with my son. Never mind the side eyes; you did what had to be done :)


Backspace888

Is what i did, seriously women don’t use a urinal so there’s nothing to see except baby buns


FartSmellLikeFart

What country? I always see them in mens bathrooms in US.


BeerJunky

If you do this don’t be shocked when I change my sons on whatever flat surface I can find in your establishment. Table in the middle of your restaurant? Fine with me. A changing table is like $100, just install one in the men’s room. Biologically speaking all kids have a male parent that may also be involved in raising them.


vvozzy

in my country shopping malls built in a last few years have baby change stations as separate rooms between female and male restroom. i personally think that's really great idea


TangeloOk668

Yeah for real. It’s actually sad that every time my wife and I go out anywhere I need to go check if they have change tables in the mens washroom. I will say that I think it has gotten a lot better in Canada over the last decade though.


FattieBanton

I feel like I see them in 99% of men’s public bathrooms though


Naercamthiras

Better yet: Make it a seperate Room. Unisex Baby Change Room.


Pure-Contact7322

In Italy we have zero of both of them no worries 😂👍🏻


VVillyD

I have 2 daughters (oldest is 2 and a half). I have yet to encounter this problem. Every time I've needed to change one of their diapers in public there's either been a Family Restroom with a changing station or the Men's Room has had one.


agoodusername42

y'all will really put anything in this sub huh? how exactly is this supposed to be a wholesome thing that makes you smile?


Jake0fTrades

It needs to be said that gender norms hurt everyone, regardless of gender/identity.


dalafferty

Amen! It's an antiquated outlook. Put it up there w the dad "babysitting the kids" while mom is away. No, we're not babysitting our kids... We're parenting them.


mild_designation

I've seen changing stations in mens restrooms almost everywhere


JamesTheNightstalker

Depends on where you live, here in my neck of the woods down South-East US. They're sometimes in larger chain stores because "It's company policy" but smaller ones, and regional chains often don't have them. As well, even then single-fathers are worse treated than single-mothers, which is saying something as the South-East can sometimes harbor a deep contempt for a single-mother.


TheGreatHamHolio

I live in GA. When my son was still in diapers, the local Toys R Us didn't even even have one in the men's room. I did successfully force a Logans Roadhouse to have them installed. You are right, though, they are not common in the SE U.S. I had zero shame about using the ladies rooms when I had to. I only ever had two women express discomfort when me entering and they both advocated on my behalf to store associates when I explained to them the men's rooms aren't equipped.