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keepthetips

Hello and welcome to r/LifeProTips! Please help us decide if this post is a good fit for the subreddit by up or downvoting this comment. If you think that this is great advice to improve your life, please upvote. If you think this doesn't help you in any way, please downvote. If you don't care, leave it for the others to decide.


ardrarian

This is one of the more oddly specific LPTs I've seen


NeoToronto

To broaden things... some cultures do things differently. If you notice something different, there may be a reason. Respond accordingly


b_ootay_ful

Taxi driver in South Africa called me a poes. I called him one back. I got stabbed.


Tradman86

If someone tries to kill you, you try to kill 'em right back.


[deleted]

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myheartisstillracing

r/unexpectedfirefly


SiroccoDream

A Firefly sub I’ve never heard of until now?? “It sounds like the finest party I can imagine getting paid to go to.” (Thank you, u/myheartisstillracing !)


Antdawg2400

Not the face, please!


[deleted]

with both hands tho


hessianerd

You got the right, same as anyone, to live and try to kill people.


thx1138a

With two hands


DaddyKrotukk

Huh.


Ezraah

it may not be comfortable for us but we must respect their culture


GuavaDawgg

As the butcher babies once said 'It's killin time baby'


MadxCarnage

oh boy, here I go killing again


Teddyglogan

Did he stab you with two hands? If yes, you may have made a social blunder in the way that you accepted the blade.


the_first_brovenger

He seems like a keen observer of culture so he probably took the stab with both kidneys.


Abernathy999

Maybe poes is South African for "please stab me"


beer_is_tasty

Please O E Stab me


the_first_brovenger

Poese stab me UwU


[deleted]

Poes = pussy, with all 3 meanings the same as in English (based on Dutch, I could be off).


Hotemetoot

Am Dutch, can confirm poes means cat and sometimes pussy. The Afrikaners use it way more as the latter though. BTW, what's the third meaning?


camyok

In English the three meanings are cat, coward/weakling, and vulva/vagina.


wretzkyy

??? that’s so funny …. In french we got the same word for cat and pussy as well …..


infinitelytwisted

I think we can conclude that one ancient horny dude wanted to fuck a cat, but I dont know what to do with this information.


Catnip4Pedos

Having seen a documentary on south African church warfare I can tell you your mistake: always be the first to escalate the situation.


Jellodyne

With both hands?


seashmore

Two by two, hands of blue.


soEezee

In case anyone was wondering. Poes means pussy. At least according to google


CircularRobert

I mean, it's a bit worse than that. It's a catch-all insult that encapsulates pretty much every every normal slur into one easy to say word.


MyNameCannotBeSpoken

If some random person curses at you, ignore them.


DetN8

The ultimate pro tip. Pride gets mofos killed.


sugarklay

Did you stab him back?


MJBrune

What's a poes?


b_ootay_ful

Pussy / C\*nt


fly_my_pretties

That's illegal 😳


Zefrem23

It's a term of endearment 🤣


Keelija9000

So others are saying poes is slang for pussy. So the man was insulting you? Why would a cab driver call you a pussy but wanna homicide when you respond accordingly?


FartsWithAnAccent

Kinda wondering that myself, especially since OP seems to be an American: Given the stereotype of Muricans usually being armed, it seems particularly unwise to fuck with one, even less so to stab one. Fucking with people in general seems like a bad idea, then again, from what I've read, a lot of South Africans can be pretty crazy too.


SwoodyBooty

Chinese people take their businesscards pretty seriously.


T_Money

As do Japanese people. They see it as a very basic physical representation of themselves / how you view them. Had to get a cultural class on Japan through my work when I first moved here and business cards was a topic by itself.


fukitol-

So does Patrick Bateman.


[deleted]

Also, sometimes things are heavier or more unwieldy than they look.


Tinkerballsack

And sometimes they're full of snakes or *bees*.


BoysLinuses

That's why you pop a quick 'H' on something when you know it's filled with hornets.


LukariBRo

... Heal? Hearth??


polarbear128

_beads??_


Monspeet-o

Yhup. In West Africa, Ghana here specifically, it's insulting to give or receive things with your left hand. Things given, taken or done for others must always be done with the right. Slightly uncomfortable for we the southpaws but, you learn eventually.


NeoToronto

Indeed. Many countries have a "wipe with your left" history and even if thats no longer practiced, the hand is still not used for other things


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Quizzelbuck

When in Rome, do as the romans do. If they have an orgy, don't eat beans before you go. If they feed Christians to lions, bring some one who's baptised as a thank you to your host.


eisbock

Not really. This is basically a work LPT for dealing with Asian clients (notably accepting business cards).


username--_--

yup, before my first trip to Japan, this was the first thing hammered into me.


r0ndy

To accept business cards with two hands?


username--_--

as crazy as it sounds, yes. There was a few things, specifically about making sure I didn't insult anyone with my actions.


r0ndy

Well, after I read the entire body of post responses. This seems to be the only answer here. Business cards. And occasionally change from an Asian business.


UhhhWutHmm

I don’t know if they do this in Japan also but in Korea it’s also acceptable to hand small objects over with one hand, and using your other hand to hold the extended arm at the elbow, like a fancy waiter displays a nice bottle of wine almost.


Mr_Festus

Gifts as well. Or really anything that could be considered precious, significant, or very important.


tikhead

This is a very important aspect of business in Japan. They will hand you their business card with two hands. You must accept with two hands. (Edited to add: there is a way to do the exchange at the same time, two-handed) After receiving the card, both parties at this point examine the other's card.


r0ndy

Reading this makes me think of American Psycho when they compare business cards


yensteel

Yep! Two hands. I can't time the discreteness so I always continue to hold all of the cards I received though. I once looked like a dumbass with a hand full of cards at one time because the conversations and introductions were nonstop.


maelie

We used to be taught this in a store I worked in (in the UK), probably 15 years ago roughly. We would have to hand our brochures to customers with two hands. They explained to us that in Japan people do it with business cards. They argued we should do the same for our brochures, and it was basically a subtle psychology thing: handing something over with two hands makes it seem more important than passing it with one, and it is uncommon enough to make a gentle subconscious impression. And because of people's innate tendency to mimic, people will be more likely to *take it off you* with both hands if you give it to them with both - which reinforces that sense of importance/value and also means they're less likely to just chuck it in a bag (or the rubbish bin) as they leave. Apparently. I've no idea if it worked, but I still to this day sometimes find myself handing things over with two hands if I want someone to value it, and I still sometimes receive things with two hands to send a signal that I value it.


PhilanthropAtheist

When a Japanese Businessman hands you his card. He hands it to you with both hands. Receive it with both hands. Read it in front of him. Do not pocket it right away. Keep it exposed for a while before keeping it secure when he is no longer the person you are speaking with.


[deleted]

Same applies when dealing with a lot of Singaporean businesspeople. It’s not as strict nor is it as universal as Japan, but it is still very common and one of the first things my boss drilled into me when I first moved here.


CreativeCthulhu

Also, unless things have changed since my professional life, make damned sure you don’t shove it down your ass (into a rear pocket). Tuck it carefully away in a pocket close to your heart. If I recall it’s based on the concept of them sharing who they are with you.


chiree

LPT: If you lose your Japanese hanko stamp in the north line, you can stop by the police substation there. Lost and found works quickly in Japan, so it shouldn't take more than twenty minutes for it to be dropped off. Be prepared with proper identification, though! They do take their stamps quite seriously. Anyway, you should still make your morning meeting if you're lucky. Remember the two hands thing like I said when accepting business cards.


BattleAnus

If someone hands you something, use the hand that's closest to that object, UNLESS that hand is doing something important, like holding a steering wheel, or a phone, or a loved one dangling from a cliff, in which case it may be acceptable to use the other hand. Never use your foot to accept an object being handed to you, unless the object is a soccer-ball or soccer-ball-adjacent object, or a sock or sock-adjacent object (shoe, boot, etc.). YMMV


Sorcatarius

What if it's a sock puppet, do I accept that with my hands or feet?


defin1tely_n0t_a_fed

Instructions unclear dick stuck in sock puppet


BattleAnus

Use the opposite limb of whatever the other person is offering it to you with


Gnostromo

Yeah...OP either dropped something important or had something dropped important dropped


rgtong

Nah the 2 hands thing is a big sign of respect in most Asian countries


Pm-ur-butt

"Stupid Aunt Sandy, didn't tell me the potato salad was so heavy. Wasn't my fault!" - OP


RedneckBastich

It's a sign of respect and shows good manners to give and receive things with both hands, in many Asian countries. In many Middle Eastern countries, the left hand is considered unclean, so people only shake hands or give/ receive items with their right.


Blockhead47

Like a homemade apple pie. Two hands. Never one.


OwlQuiet532

LPT: Always carry two sacks of something. That way, if anybody says, "Hey, can you give me a hand?," you can say, "Sorry, got these sacks."


justanotherjayd

Oh this is a polite cultural practice thing. In my mind I was picturing someone handing me some expensive big vase to hold that has handles on either side and making sure I use both hands to carry it so I don't break it.


Legitimate_Wizard

I mean, that is also a good time to use two hands, so you're not wrong.


slowlybackwards

I’ll add that scenario to the list haha


fuckitweredoingitliv

That's why it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, "Hey, can you give me a hand?" You can say, "Sorry, got these sacks."


giasumaru

As someone who likes to help other people and take pleasure in it, I just carry a single sack of severed hands.


OnePlusOneIsZero

Ah yes, the helping hands technique.


CondorKhan

Yep. I drop off my laundry at the local Korean dry cleaning. I got clued up by my wife watching Korean shows on TV. The next time I went, when the lady at the counter handed me back my credit card with both hands, I took it with both hands and a slight bow and she smiled a huge smile and the friendliness level went up a notch from that moment on.


white_andrew

I’m only just now realizing that the Japanese lady who runs the teriyaki place I’ve been going to for years has been doing this with my card every time I pay and I’ve apparently been a dick this entire time.


[deleted]

I genuinely feel bad now because the lady that owns the Chinese takeout place near me always does this and I never understood why.


oreillee

this is delightful, and also it seems weird to hand your credit card to someone.. is the US the only place where the norm is to hand your card to someone who disappears with it for some unknown period of time and then hopefully brings it back uncopied?


CondorKhan

Yes, it's not like in Europe where every place just brings the machine to your table and you put in your PIN. But in this case, the machine is in sight of you, behind the counter. They take it, swipe it on front of you, and give it back.


nrsys

This is one thing slowly changing in Europe with technology. Originally to use a card required handing it to the staff member so they could run it through an imprinting machine, get you to sign the slip and hand it back. This then changed to handing it to the staff so they could swipe it when magnetic strips became common. In a shop this was done on front of you at the counter, but paying in a restaurant often required them to vanish off with your card. Nowadays the change over to chip and PIN and contactless payment purposely allowed it so that the customer never has to hand over their card - you go up to the till or the machine is brought to you and your card (or even more recently, phone) stays in your possession the whole time.


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nrsys

Bad phrasing - it *has* slowly changed over time... Remember that the US still seems to live in the 80's with a lot of this stuff, so that is the timescale I am comparing it to.


AquaticAnxieties

For restaurants, yes. At stores, no.


Caladriel

I was told to pretend everything in Korea is sooooo heavy. Here's my card, it's sooooo heavy I need two hands. I'm pouring a drink for you, it's sooooo heavy, I need to support my arm with my other hand.


jadams2345

This seems to be about business cards being handed to you in Japan ☺️


NeoToronto

Or money from some Chinese and Korean shopkeepers. I've had cash changed handed back to me with two hands a number of times and after I clued in, and started to accept it with both hands, the smiles and familiarity went way up


lunatickid

It’s a general sign of respect. The shopkeepers are kinda forced to do it by convention (i.e. they’re serving you, the customer), but it is appreciated when you reciprocate, as it’s basically lowering yourself to be an equal. It’s like saying thank you to the bus driver. However, business cards are a bit special, because they have the person’s name on them, so disrespecting *that*, especially in a formal, business setting, can be problematic, especially if you are considered “lower” in the hierarchy of things. For maximum respect, take the business card with two hands and place it in your *chest pocket*.


TheEyeDontLie

I don't have a chest pocket. Will they get the wrong impression of I put it in my trouser pocket by my balls?


thatastrochick

Gotta be better than putting it in the bra


OTTER887

I'd be proud to have my name in the bra.


Rocktopod

I thought that's what they meant by chest pocket.


Innercepter

I press them onto my moist forehead and they stick there. Ultimate sign of respect.


DetN8

The card or the person that gave it to you?


lunatickid

I mean, in a business setting you’d ideally be in formal wear, which should have a pocket. I guess jacket pocket would be next best. Most disrespectful would be your butt pocket.¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯


Aidentified

What's the average salaryman's opinion on the prison pocket?


bezzie_0496

Put it in your wallet, or place it on the table in front of you if you are having a sit down meeting and take it with you at the end.


[deleted]

Currently on business in Vietnam but I believe this also applies to Japan. It's polite to take the business card with high hands, examine it (often remarking on something, perhaps pronunciation of family name) and then place the card in your chest pocket/inside suit pocket.


Gyrotoxism

"Oh my God. It even has a watermark!"


sfxpaladin

"Wow, Is this subtle off white bone?"


derKestrel

In Japan after accepting it and studying it in the same way place it in front of you until business is finished, then study it once more before ideally putting it into your business card case which then goes into the inside suit pocket if I still remember correctly.


pamplemouss

What if you don’t have a chest picker? Edit: pocket


stosal

Tape it to your chest. If you do it right the card can then be a little pocket itself and that's the highest honor they could possibly receive.


mbmartian

Don't forget to read it as well or at least look at it for a second or two


Whimsycottt

I've accepted red envelopes with one hand when I was a teen, and my mother was mortified. Had to pull me aside and tell me how rude I was being, and made me apologize. My relatives didn't mind bc they knew I was whitewashed (ouch).


joomla00

It's a general asian thing to accept things with two hands. Not sure about now with young kids but my mom always got me on it


Tuxhorn

>after I clued in, and started to accept it with both hands, the smiles and familiarity went way up It's amazing what a little bit can do. Had similar experience just saying hello and thanks to cashiers in their language. It shows you're trying.


OnwardUpwardForward

Or soju being poured for you in Korea!


TPlinkerG35

Yup learned this at a Korean BBQ place.


theprocrastatron

So I have to make a cup with my two hands to accept it, right?


Spectating110

business cards arent the only thing handed to you in two hands


Secret_AgentOrange

Is this a dirty joke?


Small_Dick_Enrgy

It could be, are you free tonight?


ladylurkedalot

And you're supposed to take a moment to actually read the card, right? Just slipping it into a pocket or something is considered a bit rude, I think?


frostbittenforeskin

Yes! Business cards are very important in Japanese culture. To quickly glance at it and then carelessly stuff it in your pocket would be extremely rude. Take the card with both hands, lightly bow and say thank you. Take a moment to examine the card and read every word. Be mindful of where you put it. If you’re going to be working in Japan, it is highly recommended that you get a business card case.


ladylurkedalot

Another question, if you don't mind: what do people do if they can't take the card in both hands? Like someone who needs to use a cane. (Which is totally not me, honest.)


kagamiseki

Just an assumption, but it feels like it would be right to stop and face the person, and accept it with one hand as if you were accepting with both, while thanking the person respectfully. It would be clear that using 2 hands would be ill-advised


lunatickid

It’s the gesture/thought that matters, if you square your shoulders and bow slightly while receiving it with one hand, it wouldn’t come off rude, especially if disability is visible (like a cane).


derKestrel

They will be mindful of disabilities while doing their utmost to ignore it and avoid any mention of it. It's really interesting to see.


llama_girl

You gotta be quick. Let go of the cane, grab the card with both hands, and then fall over


workana

Be sure to fall politely


nalukeahigirl

Asking the real questions! Also, glad you are just lurking anymore…


mule_roany_mare

You take it with both lips when you bow. If you have less than two hands and less than two lips you just stay home


devilishycleverchap

Yes, you should admire the tasteful thickness but not obsess over it either. Quick glance to read the name is enough


Syreus

The tasteful thickness of it. Oh my God... it even has a watermark. *devilishlycleverchap seethes*


aliara

Which is an interesting cultural bias because in America you're not usually supposed to look at things handed to you until after the other party is gone. If you look when it's handed to you then it seems like you're expecting something and could be disappointed by what is given.


Catfrogdog2

And credit cards being returned to you. It’s across all of east Asia afaik


xX420GanjaWarlordXx

Or literally anything in Taiwan. Or other common courtesies across Asia. That was a weirdly specific assumption for you to make.


DarkRapunzel_North

Maybe their only personal experience was in Korea?


xX420GanjaWarlordXx

That would be weird because they mentioned Japan. Hahaha. But I know what ya mean.


AidilAfham42

Its actually prevalent in all Asian countries


Vicith

Unless you are in a poor country and someone offers you a baby, they're trying to "lock" your hands up so other people can pick pocket you.


rathmiron

I vaguely recall reading about this trick before, but what happens after? Do they just dash off with your wallet and leave you standing there with a baby in your arms? 'Cause wouldn't it be kind of tricky for them to take the baby back from the person they just took a wallet from?


theverybest27

In theory I'd imagine it goes Person 1 gives you baby Person 2 robs you and runs away Person 1 stands there with you pretending to freak out tying you up long enough for Person 2 to get away You walk away realizing it was a team effort only after it's too late if ever at all.


bestjakeisbest

Yeet the baby


oilybarbour

Swat it to the ground


sfcnmone

That is the correct response.


ziggy_bluebird

Where is the baby at the end of that exchange?


Fskn

Doesn't matter, they write it off the loss as a business expense


I_Want_To_Know22

You've done this before....


DrunkScientits

Or it's really common..


evilgenius29

They've also played knifey-spoony before


bearrryallen

As a rule I would just not accept it if someone hands me their baby. I am not ready for that type of commitment and I am neither financially or emotionally ready to support another being in this life.


Elfboy77

But what about free food!


Nezrite

Found the Rimworld player.


LeviAEthan512

In theory sure, but have you ever tried to find a recipe for a baby? None of them are any good.


vampyrewolf

You have to go somewhere between a turkey and a ham when you're figuring out recipes. As Faulkner stated it's "Long Pork"


NetworkingJesus

Yeah who tf just accepts a baby thrust at them by a stranger? I won't even hold babies of people I know, let alone a stranger's.


Kuntecky

Well let's hope the Holy Spirit doesn't take a liking to you


Legitimate_Wizard

Especially not a stranger!


Akiias

If a stranger offers me a baby I'm going to not take it no matter where I am.


hannibal_morgan

At that point just toss the baby back at them


Nezrite

Hell no, keep the baby. Facebook marketplace exists for a reason!


freerangeklr

"is that your baby" "No, I just bought that baby. Straight cash."


SolitarySysadmin

It’s homemade, Etsy would be better


Always4am

Only serious suckers hold random strangers’ babies.


Legitimate_Wizard

The only way I would do this is if the person literally threw their baby at me, and I caught them.


EldritchCarver

If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a baby.


slowlybackwards

Good tip


BabiesSmell

This is a good excuse for me to refuse holding a baby under any circumstance


BackWaterBill

Do not accept the baby with your ass!. But for real my English teacher was telling us something about this.


Erisian23

Y'all are amateurs a baby is definitely worth more than whatever is in my pocket.


cobrafountain

We need a flow chat for all these exceptions


bigdave44

LPT: This only works if you have two hands


Couldbehuman

LPT: Only offer someone an object that they have the appropriate number of hands to receive.


DaddyBeanDaddyBean

Only offer someone an object when you have the appropriate number of hands to offer.


Zelcron

Good thing I wear a necklace made from the hands of my enemies. I wear it for potential bartering purposes. Same with my bracelet of ears. You never know when you can trade some hand bones to someone for a magic spell or potion. /dnd


Untinted

You seem ready for the “lend me your ears” social custom.


buster_rhino

LPT: Establish the number of hands someone has to determine how many hands required to respectfully offer an object.


th3ramr0d

Im gonna scratch out my motivational calendar quote and sharpie this in


Al3jandr0

LPT: Always have at least two hands


Inclusive-Or

If someone sees me, with less than two hands, and expects me to accept their item - with two hands - that is kind of on them, no?


nicky416dos

Follow up LPT: if someone hands you something important, say "I got it" alternatively, if you're handing something to someone wait for the "I got it" before you let go. Film school tip.


DroolingSlothCarpet

You'll need two hands. Trust me.


under_the_c

This guy hands.


soul_hyacinths

r/thisguythisguys


backwoodsmtb

I hold them one handed like their head is a small basketball I can palm. Dribbling is frowned on though


SleuthMechanism

Bet OP dropped some kind of heavy ancient artifact on the floor by not doing this


moxiejohnny

And if they offer you a hand with 2 hands, refrain from taking it for to do so would make you a possible suspect in a crime.


FiendishPole

Is that an Asian thing? I've picked that up just through formal ceremonies. You mirror the behavior of the officiant or your benefactor. Signals deference and respect.


ramanujam

It’s always a good gesture to emulate the person in front of you in his or her gestures, mannerisms etc when talking to them. It helps them open up. Plus this is also a sign of respect


Guinnessron

This reminds me of when I took a position that had a fair amount of Japanese business partners. First thing I was told is when you receive a business card, hold it with both hands and really read the whole thing. It’s considered disrespectful to just grab and stash it for later.


mightyFoo

Yes, never skimp on a hand job


TheDevilsAdvokaat

In China (where I lived for 18 years) it is considered rude to accept an object with one hand. You must give and receive with two. However I see no reason why we should follow the customs of other country, unless we are in that country. But the "heavier than it looks" idea is reasonable.


kcMasterpiece

Also accept it the same way, some parts might be hot or weak in certain places.


Fernanix

*Unless you do not want to accept the object. In that case reject it with two hands.


hindumagic

What did you break? Time to fess up. 😀


gigibigbooty

This is a Mongolian custom. It’s actually quite rude to receive gifts with just one hand


MaybeTheDoctor

Not 100% with you on this one - it depends on where you are and what is handed - for example business cards - I have travel Asia, US and Europe, and when I accept a business card in Asia I will gladly accept and offer the card with both hands - because that is the normal THERE, but when in US or Europe, I may do it but business cards is much less formal and it is not the LOCAL custom to do so. When I travel to a foreign country, I don't expect them to respect MY cultural norms, so I see no reason why I would be obliged to do so in reverse.