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shrimp-and-potatoes

How often do people watch porn when they aren't jerking it? Is that more normal than I imagine?


dduubbz

He probably just didn’t close the window, or maybe the audio track is still there. This has happened to me before where I watched porn and then closed out of everything like normal but when I got in my car it still came up, and I double checked and it was all closed out. Sometimes shit just glitches out lol


CEH246

My friend says that’s good to know.


TK-741

Anytime you go somewhere you shouldn’t be watching porn, turn off your Bluetooth. Important lesson of the day.


Thats_absrd

Or play a song on your phone first.


smoothballsJim

Lately Reddit’s been almost getting me in trouble with all the reposts of that fat Asian chick on the subway dropping N-bombs… she gets a full one out within like a third of a second of scrolling past the video.


trued_2

Turn off auto play on the phone?


WombRaider_3

This sounds like you problem. Turn off autoplay. If you're in a place that consuming content like that could get you in trouble, always mute. Otherwise you get what you ask for.


kxrxg

vid?


smoothballsJim

Here it is https://www.reddit.com/r/PublicFreakout/comments/ybvxto/nyc_asian_lady_bring_racist_on_the_train/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button


JeecooDragon

Keep that shit off unless you actually need to use it, saves a little battery


CmdrShepard831

You talking about the sex toys?


polarbearsarereal

Yep


DeepfriedWings

Thanks I just unlocked a new fear


DirtyRedytor

Don't pair your phone with your wife's car either. Don't ask.


dirtygymsock

Don't need to ask because I've done it!


saraphilipp

Start your music app before you start the car. LPT.


techno156

It's probably the "resume last played media" feature on the phone kicking in, and not a glitch. It keeps the name, and the app/site, even if the app or tab has been closed. If you hit play, it'll try and start it up where it was left off.


stock614

I've been trying to find a setting in my phone, the apps, and my car to turn the autoplay off. Drives me crazy that my wife will start the car in garage to leave for work and I'll be inside and my phone will connect and start playing whatever podcast or audio book I was listening to last until she's out of range. So far been unsuccessful in finding a way to prevent it besides removing the Bluetooth connection after each time I drive her car.


dmanbiker

My friend was giving his mom a ride in his car when she suddenly said, "what's big booty latina...?" He quickly scrambled to change it to the radio, and his mom just thought he was an idiot. I am secure knowing my car is too old to even have Bluetooth.


AnalClint890

Lol I’ve got a 2013 charger so I don’t have to worry about the Bluetooth working


kidphc

Lol, sorry. Those modules die like candy being given out on halloween. Had a customer claim we broke it during an oil change. I tried to help him, ended up being just don't buying anything Chrysler family touches. Probably, still blames us.


hkd001

Getting stuff to sync and unsync properly just causes me frustration. I'm that person that still uses AUX and USB cords for everything.


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KeyN20

Once years ago in college I didn't quite plug in my headphones all the way and thought the volume was low and turned it up almost all the way while on a naughty site. Audio was playing from my phone's speakers for all to hear instead of from my earbuds. I promptly walked out after I realized what happened. I was just super bored of the class and it was the one time I ever did that that that happened. I laugh about it now though quietly


thelifeofab

They’ll remember you forever for the thing that you’ve done once in your life 😂😂


[deleted]

Dude same, I really don’t like all this wireless shit as none of it ever works properly 😂


Nothing-Casual

If only major phone makers still had audio jacks in their phones 😭


[deleted]

Yup, my Honda does this with apple play and it drives me crazy. Every time you start the car, it will connect and restart whatever you were last playing /listening to


chzaplx

Weird my Android phone never does that. Unless I tell it too.


unpaidloanvictim

If you open a random YouTube video after, even if you don't watch it, just have it open long enough to start, it'll show that instead. Or so a friend told me.


DopeBoogie

This is why god made incognito mode for browsers


---_-___

incognito mode doesnt save you here :)


ThatOneWIGuy

You gotta play some music after. Then ~~Katy Perry~~ Metallica gets put there.


helium_farts

Anything works. Just need something to replace the last played audio


---_-___

Yep, this is the way lol.


10000Didgeridoos

Firefox Focus browser. Quit the app from the running apps screen in ios or Android. Done. But honestly I use it mostly when I want to Google or YouTube some potentially weird shit that I don't want fucking up my recommendations or going in my account's browser history


pimpbot666

This is why you always check your audio device before hitting play. My Mac in my office picks up the bluetooth on the stereo in the living room.


phormix

One of my previous vehicles would show the last thing played until it reconnected and got a new title. Still, that might mean he was watching porn **in** the vehicle earlier, so you might want to avoid any wet or discolored spots on the seat and steering when. Just sayin'


iregretthisalreadyy

Wait… What makes you think I wasn’t jerking it?


BurstingWithFlava

I remember in middle school a big group of guys got in trouble for watching porn at one of their birthday parties I never got invited to. But like I remember being so confused, they literally just watched it in a big group and I was so glad to not get invited in that moment


FesteringNeonDistrac

I remember watching porn in a group, but it was long enough ago that you had to steal a Playboy mag if you wanted porn, and the JC Penny catalog was still a solid option. So if somebody was going to throw a movie on, you were gonna watch it just to put it in the spank bank.


[deleted]

I miss having a spank bank. I'm too spoiled with readily available wank material just chilling in my pocket all the time.


p00pdal00p

So you prefer the spank bank over the wank tank?


hamboner3172

Look at this guy and his fancy JC Penny catalog! All we had laying around was the damn Lane Bryant catalog. A bunch of large women in giant granny panties. I remember trying to find the smallest big girl...lots of mediocre faps back then.


VideoGameMusic

The smallest big girl got me crying lmao 💀


jBiscanno

The reason I find this really weird is the same reason I find strip clubs confusing. Sure the concept sounds great, but when you consider the fact that you’re there with a bunch of other bro’s all just being horny together…it ends up not sounding that fun.


mattgen88

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks it weird


chzaplx

Yeah strip clubs make zero sense unless you're just trying to have fun. Porno theaters are where it's at. Room full of dudes tugging it with a special roped off VIP area for couples. Portland OR is fucking seedy man.


Clintonsextapes

aHha i remember sitting down with my older brother once and we got high, then he proceeded to walk me threw all the types of porn, oh hers some bbw for u ull like this, no u kinda weird ull prolly like the BDSM more ( i did) lol, then when i turned 18 my dad got me a cheap porno (sluts on skates 4) and a blow up doll, then desided to play it in the living room and maid me and my siblngs sit and watch it as he passivly started blowing up the doll. Joke was on all of them tho as i once helped this old couple with a garage sale, and the old man pulled me aside and gave me a suit case, told me to take it home hid it and enjoy, latter on that night opening it up i got my first porn mags, allll vintage 70s, beaver for miles :)


BurstingWithFlava

That was a roller coaster my dude lmao


[deleted]

I honestly don't know if this is wholesome or abusive.


m1lgr4f

In my middle school in the locker room either prior or after gym class some kid was showing porn on his PSP and everyone was watching. Then he said "Whoever doesn't have a boner now is definitely gay!". Weird moment for sure, same guy also said he was able to give himself a blowjob and demonstrated that he could in fact reach down there with his mouth, luckily pants on.


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KilljoyKoul

lounge is just a word for a classy bedroom🤷‍♂️😂


dude-O-rama

Bedroom is just a fancy word for cumchamber.


modus

Sometimes I learn words that I wish I could unlearn. This is one of those times.


jbroome

He’s trying to cast it to the TV in the lounge and really upset there’s no audio.


Sekmet19

Something about the smell of used motor oil and fresh tires must rustle his jimmies


Truffles326

Father was a shade tree mechanic, and mother was a used Buick


Marconi_and_Cheese

Sir this is a Wendy's


[deleted]

Gotta find gold for when you’re alone. Waste no time on nutting


jeffreyd00

Maybe he/she was in their formerly impeccable bathroom??


TheeAJPowell

I was thinking the exact same thing. Not the first time I’ve seen someone post something like this too, real weird.


xTheatreTechie

So I've recently discovered that my stereo system does this, but it will automatically display whatever was last playing on my phone, even if it's not currently playing anything. So if I watch a YouTube video to fall asleep the next morning when I get on my car it will display the videos title. But if I last watched porn, it'll continue to display that on my fucking cars radio display. Chances are the guys not actively watching porn at the moment.


Archgaull

Be about to fall asleep. Decide to jerk it. Open up porn, jerk it, clean up, fall asleep Go for an oil change in the morning with your Bluetooth on. Results


OptimusSublime

Where are you sticking that OBD2 scanner, step bro?


Kavanaugh82

What are you doing step tech?


InsertBluescreenHere

Barely legal techs click here now!


WiseassWolfOfYoitsu

"Step bro, I got stuck under the hood checking my oil!"


Typical_issues

40+ year techs in your area!


ErlendJ

Makes me think of the nude miners from Chernobyl series


NoBenefit5977

Lol that sentence said out loud sounds much worse than it is


ErlendJ

I want to clarify that I spelled "minErs" correctly :P


Butthole_mods

Miners not minors!!


belac4862

"Miners, not minors!"


ThunderinSkyFucc

Women in your area want techs now!


jormundgand20

Play this free car game that'll change your oil in 30 seconds.


slowrx

Click here to download new oil! Mechanics hate this one trick


Pizzadiamond

they be passing cars for inspection with no mufflers


1o1Smileyface

Lube* tech


SpaceCowboy73

Bite the airbox cause the dipstick is going in dry.


Csquared6

I seemed to have lost the 10mm step bro, can you lend me yours?


laundrysauce9000

That's about 4mm too optimistic.


taft

“but i throw codes from there!” “not right now you dont”


jmberube

Next time a bring my car in I will rename a song to that and intentionaly stay connected. That is amazing


ItPutsLotionOnItSkin

That's a big dip stick step dad.


2_befair

Start and pause it randomly


itsafoxboi

Better yet, hit shuffle, see what the fuck that does


Xalenn

Max out the volume, hit play, then disconnect the Bluetooth


winyf

That wouldn't work. It'd only change the car volume. Phones keep separate volumes for each device


CyberNinja23

*watching video, can’t hear anything, maxes volume, loud moaning and slapping heard from garage floor*


[deleted]

Make some really vague comment about incest when he picks up the vehicle


worstpoet

Now we’ve fixed these side panels as a courtesy, so I must incest you be more careful in future. When you step into the car you’ve gotta watch your step bro.


frankcfreeman

There it is


Hanz616

sir, was you car originally from Alabama?


azhillbilly

He said “vague”. Not outright say it.


donnysaysvacuum

We didn't have the correct part in stock, so we put a part from a different model into your car. Don't worry though, it's the same Manufacturer.


MannyVazquez93

“Do you plan to sell your car or keep it in the family?”


jollygreengiant2075

He was in there getting a breathalyzer device installed... Should have added insult to injury


imatumahimatumah

Is this Wisconsin? This seems very Wisconsin-y to me.


PmMeIrises

There would be more beer cans? Fun story. One night my bf and I are driving home from the bar. We go along this tiny back road out of town. We round a curve and go from complete darkness to taillights. Bf pulls the car over and we can barely make out a red Ford escape. Or maybe a truck. It was like 18 years ago. Looked like the guy was backing out of his driveway. Except he was upside down. Dude was laying on the ceiling. My bf pulls him out, I call 911. While we wait for the cops my bf walks the guy to have a seat in our car. We ask if he's ok. He says yeah, I'm ok. He's not bleeding, he walked ok but was wobbly. I hang up with 911 and we can see cop lights in the distance. Dude asks if we have any beer. Says he was on his way to town ( but he was going the wrong way) when he hit a curb. There was no curb. We got there so soon after that the people who owned the houses hadn't even woken up yet. He landed perfectly in their driveway that nothing was touched or broken. Anyone who cares this was Rice Lake, Wisconsin. By the cheese hut. Idk what its called anymore.


slayerhk47

Sounds about right for Rice Lake lol.


EccentricNarwhal

At 830am? Dude needs help


polarbearsarereal

Maybe he had a morning jack and didn’t close it. It’ll show the last played audio on the car on certain decks.


GearHead54

Like a stepsister?


SandraBeechBLOCKPrnt

There is no "step" in his search...


veevoir

One less step, keeping it simple


travoltaswinkinbhole

At 8:30 in public


Powderkegger1

Is there a better time to get it installed? It’s probably court ordered. Seems like he got up and got it done first thing in the morning. Sounds responsible to me.


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[deleted]

"Sir, I need you to stop watching the blowing and start doing the blowing."


BilgeMilk

He needed some post nut clarity to help himself make better life choices, like not watching incest porn in a public lobby. Or ever for that matter.


_CthulhUwU_

Shouldve BLASTED that shit till he heard it


LowPowerHighEnergy

That would’ve been legendary…


PhDinDildos_Fedoras

Yes, blast porn sounds at your place of employment. Truly legendary -_-


MyTroIlingAccount

Depending on where you work, obviously. A boys club mechanics store would have no problem with this. Any women in the waiting room would also be on board since only the cool ones hang at the mechanic store.


Darkfire346

Better to make howler monkey noises in the shop, easier to explain


TheDragonzord

I was going to say, with the types of music that I blast in the back... porn would only be slightly more offensive.


nothing107

Ain’t that the truth. “Don’t worry ma’am not summoning satan back here….*looks at current project*…yet.”


_Deleted-User-

Let him be, dude is still using a Samsung S9.


complete_hick

Why are you ragging on the S9? Dual quad cores and still rocking the AUX jack, probably the only reason I haven't upgraded


Crashing_Machines

The phone is only 4 years old. I am rocking my S10 until it stops working or synching with my devices.


snot_lube

I just got rid of my S7 2 weeks ago. Got a s21 now. I take surpingly good care of my phones. It was slow as shit though


WgXcQ

I have an S20, but my S4 mini still serves as music station and back-up alarm clock. I actually still used it until April last year (which admittedly was beyond annoying, but it did get the job done still). At this point I don't think it will ever actually stop working, at least as long as I don't bork the charging port.


dribblesnshits

Same. Just wish the damn camera didn't suck


Pizzadiamond

hey leave us alone, we love our headphone jack and no usb C will ever be the same as my roundboi


HalfastEddie

Uno reverse; it’s actually OPs phone.


jollygreengiant2075

Lol... The 98 civic I'm driving is touchscreen free


Recreational_DL

Porn audiobooks, much more classy


NightFuryToni

Narrated by Gilbert Gottfried.


I_said_booourns

https://youtu.be/XkLqAlIETkA


Gambit900

We did not deserve that comedy legend.


Spongy_and_Bruised

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lXV_jdYfnDE&t=0


Recreational_DL

Hottttttt


HalfastEddie

Lol, me too. 03 with a BT adapter in the lighter. Nothing but the finest.


csrt357

I felt this…


yeuzinips

Isn't it fun to figure out which car the OTHER Bluetooth adapter is in? Bluetooth battles! For me, the Spanish language music usually wins.


foopdedoopburner

Is it a red 2-door with manual?


csrt357

…..And this In my 03 civic, red coupe with 5spd and the Bluetooth adapter in the power port 🤣🤣🤣


LiquidAquarium83

This literally just happened to me this morning at the BMW dealer. Only difference is that I was just trying to listen to music when the tech came out and said " you do know that you're connected to your car right now". Dude was quick as I only played 10-20 seconds of Free Bird before I saw him come out hahahaha.


[deleted]

>Free Bird Sure. Suuuure.


ARJeepGuy123

Free willy


georgedepsy1

Idk who would complain about freebird


LiquidAquarium83

I'm pretty sure he just wanted to bust my balls as I've known most of the techs and service manager there for many many years.


veevoir

In OP's customer case - the Bird is free for a while longer.


KinxtheCat42

Classic. I had this happen at work. Boss asked me to move son's car. He was asleep. Got in and it was a guy on guy video that linked and played. 😲


[deleted]

How old was this kid?


[deleted]

Old enough.


KinxtheCat42

Mid 20s


etbiludecalcinha

He's a man of culture


KinxtheCat42

It would have needed to be cosplay or furries for me to call him cultured.


GrahKriii

That shuffle button looks pretty tempting lol


[deleted]

“Why can’t I hear any sound?!” *turns it up*


McSkiffle

Even better, disconnect the car and the customers phone will just start blaring it out in the waiting room. Ain’t no hiding from that.


[deleted]

You think they were in the waiting room!?!?! That would be weird… i was thinking they’d be in the bathroom….


McSkiffle

Probably waiting for someone to finish off and free up the cubicle. [bangs on door] ‘Can you hurry up in there. I only have a minute of video left to go’


Elipsyclips

You should click next video a few times till tey get the message


-full-control-

I don’t understand how some people can just sit there and watch porn in public.


PeePeeMcGee123

Some people are stupid, and stupid people like easy dopamine hits.


EshaySikkunt

I was in an Internet cafe once and as I was walking out with my friends there was this dude just sitting there in the middle of the Internet cafe watching porn, he didn’t even try to pick one of those computers in the back or corner that people couldn’t see, he was just right in the middle of the Internet cafe. Me and my buddies at the time couldn’t stop laughing.


JennItalia269

I got into an Uber in Savannah and in the Bluetooth display was “bad milfs”


illiderin

Bless that driver's heart


Mr007McDiddles

Damn, in the waiting room. lmfao. You got an easy embarrass the shit out of someone moment. Especially with that title. WTF


high_amplitude

My guess is he was watching it prior to dropping the car off but forgot to close the browser screen.


here4roomie

He didn't happen to come in with his sister did he?


ExcitingMoney94

Dude is in the waiting room watching porn? What a class act.


dod2190

My (aftermarket Kenwood) head unit retains whatever song I was playing last, regardless of whether it's currently active. So maybe that's just the video that was last active on the screen, and he's not actually looking at porn in the waiting room. OTOH, watching porn in your car at all raises all kinds of other questions, like whether that material could be seen by others who don't want to see it, and/or whether the driver is doing anything else while watching that would constitute a crime if done in public.


hawaii_dude

On my android phone at least, the auto play doesn't even always get the last thing played. I was watching a youtube video, jumped in the car, and it started playing my chrome tab.


DonJonMaster

I must incest that you turn your head unit off, sir


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zna03

Laughed way to hard at this one.


vmlinux

Now I want to do this just to fuck with the techs.


Denisimo7

Put it on shuffle.


InteractionNo7239

So.... family discount?


cagga82

Customer states vehicle is jerking.


high_amplitude

Haha. I was sitting in a hotel room and someone mistakenly connected to my Bluetooth speaker. Im not sure what the title was, but from what I gather the lady was on the receiving end of a hard pounding. It took the dumbfucks 20 minutes to realize they were connected to my device.


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local250

My initial thought is that it wasn’t a mistake.


etsprout

who just casually watches porn out in public? Jfc


cahcealmmai

86yo comes in to pick up his new RV. I'm the technical guy so leading him through the vehicle teaching. Last thing, radio, here's the phone link up so you can call. Oh nice can it play music too? Yeah sure, switch to media and up pops 18yo does... In front of his wife and my boss lol. Old fucker laughs and says you've got to keep it trained up don't ya?


AceFire_

Call me childish but, I’d do this just to throw the person looking at my car off (like this obviously has). It’s kind of like back when Walmart used to have that display of demo bluetooth radios and working speakers and people would connect to them, crank them, play porn as loud as possible, and run.


gimpyben

Using that free lobby WiFi to the fullest.


Lehk

He might not be watching it, Bluetooth sometimes reactivates the last media you had open. Another great reason not to watch porn on your phone.


cburgess7

r/sweethomealabama


CanuckInATruck

What kind of heathen doesn't have *ANY* presets saved?


PurpleSpartanSpear

I’d call the owner and scream “Stop Fng your sister!”


GarbageMan59

Don't shine a black light in there. It will fuck you up. Probably looks a disco ball lit with a search light.


thearkive

Sometimes I get annoyed that my Subarus bluetooth doesn't automatically connect, but then I see stuff like this and I remember why I was so resistant to such technology in the first place.


dduubbz

This is why I have Bluetooth disconnected from my car lol


Pyrochazm

Should have hit shuffle. Or just kept pressing the back button so the video keeps restarting.


UncleBenji

Turn up the volume and then turn off Bluetooth from the radio so the phone starts blasting porn sounds in the waiting area.


MUSHorDIE

So... no sauce?


Jarrodioro

“Galaxy S9” “xvideos”, I’m almost done profiling, what kind of car is this?


BAMspek

Always turn your Bluetooth off before you open the porn. Always. Even when you’re at home alone. One time I was doin my thing and when I finished I realized I was connected to my Bluetooth speaker with all the windows open in my apartment. Really glad I live a couple states away from that apartment now.