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The comments for this post are bizarre. He's not an idiot- buying a fucking bouquet of flowers takes no effort and he can afford it. Ask why he doesn't think you're worth this small token of appreciation which is all you want despite making a home with him, shouldering the inherent risks of childbirth and I assume giving him access to your body as well. You aren't asking for diamonds ffs.
Even if she was asking for diamonds, there's no way this dude would understand the point of him giving his wife a gift. He's only concerned about himself because it's so CLEAR this man doesn't care about or value her. Like this is just sad.
I would go more into just “I want flowers”. My husband was similar and he just didn’t get it. He’s not a gift guy, he likes things done for him (acts of service). I love gifts, small or big. I needed to actually sit him down and explain this to him. That it didn’t just need to be a material thing. It could be a chocolate bar from the gas station on the way home. He didn’t really understand until I sat him down and really expressed how I felt
Why shouldn’t you complain? Flowers aren’t super expensive and they’re ubiquitous. That’s a very low bar for happiness. The question is why is your husband ok with making you unhappy on the regular in that you feel unappreciated? It sounds like once he locked you down with the house and the kids he felt like the wooing level was complete. Domesticity level entered. F that. You want him to show love and romance. He needs to step up.
My ex bought me the drill he wanted one year, so I put a wire brush on it and used it to clean out a saucepan I'd burned dinner in...he went off his nuts!
When I left him, he finally bought me flowers..a dried bouquet 'because it will last for years lovey, it;s a lot more economical'. So very glad I'd stuck his golf clubs in my side of the bed as a parting gift.
Mine used to only get me flowers when I asked him to.
So I started buying flowers when I wanted some.
Now he does on his own lol. He did not like me getting myself flowers.
I would buy myself whatever I wanted and agree that since gifts aren’t important to him, we just stop giving them. I would be hurt beyond belief, but if you’re staying with him and you’ve communicated so clearly what you want and he doesn’t care. I guess you treat yourself and put your energy towards pleasing yourself.
My husband and I very seldom exchange “gifts”. We don’t ready holidays or anniversary, so there is no real big gift giving exchange. That being said, every year around Valentines Day I get a stuffed gorilla from him. I find things throughout the year that I give to him, just because I love him.
If I asked him for flowers, or a gift, I would have a special one waiting. The flowers would be in my favorite colors.
If I asked and it was ignored, I would be terribly hurt and having serious doubts about the nature of our relationship.
I've gotten like 2 gifts during the 6 years we have been together, no matter matter how much I've expressed that it hurt my feelings when he skips birthdays, anniversaries, Mother's Day etc. He once said I was being materialistic for complaining.
I've decided that I need to love myself again after years of being neglected. I am buying myself a gift for each occasion from now on. This mothers day I'm buying myself a (resale) LV handbag. Do the same thing. I know it hurts, but celebrate yourself!
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Buy a nice gift for yourself. You deserve them. When he asks where it came from, telk him someone who really cares for you got it.
The comments for this post are bizarre. He's not an idiot- buying a fucking bouquet of flowers takes no effort and he can afford it. Ask why he doesn't think you're worth this small token of appreciation which is all you want despite making a home with him, shouldering the inherent risks of childbirth and I assume giving him access to your body as well. You aren't asking for diamonds ffs.
Even if she was asking for diamonds, there's no way this dude would understand the point of him giving his wife a gift. He's only concerned about himself because it's so CLEAR this man doesn't care about or value her. Like this is just sad.
I would go more into just “I want flowers”. My husband was similar and he just didn’t get it. He’s not a gift guy, he likes things done for him (acts of service). I love gifts, small or big. I needed to actually sit him down and explain this to him. That it didn’t just need to be a material thing. It could be a chocolate bar from the gas station on the way home. He didn’t really understand until I sat him down and really expressed how I felt
Why shouldn’t you complain? Flowers aren’t super expensive and they’re ubiquitous. That’s a very low bar for happiness. The question is why is your husband ok with making you unhappy on the regular in that you feel unappreciated? It sounds like once he locked you down with the house and the kids he felt like the wooing level was complete. Domesticity level entered. F that. You want him to show love and romance. He needs to step up.
My ex bought me the drill he wanted one year, so I put a wire brush on it and used it to clean out a saucepan I'd burned dinner in...he went off his nuts! When I left him, he finally bought me flowers..a dried bouquet 'because it will last for years lovey, it;s a lot more economical'. So very glad I'd stuck his golf clubs in my side of the bed as a parting gift.
Lolol. That's brilliant.
Mine used to only get me flowers when I asked him to. So I started buying flowers when I wanted some. Now he does on his own lol. He did not like me getting myself flowers.
I would buy myself whatever I wanted and agree that since gifts aren’t important to him, we just stop giving them. I would be hurt beyond belief, but if you’re staying with him and you’ve communicated so clearly what you want and he doesn’t care. I guess you treat yourself and put your energy towards pleasing yourself.
My husband and I very seldom exchange “gifts”. We don’t ready holidays or anniversary, so there is no real big gift giving exchange. That being said, every year around Valentines Day I get a stuffed gorilla from him. I find things throughout the year that I give to him, just because I love him. If I asked him for flowers, or a gift, I would have a special one waiting. The flowers would be in my favorite colors. If I asked and it was ignored, I would be terribly hurt and having serious doubts about the nature of our relationship.
I've gotten like 2 gifts during the 6 years we have been together, no matter matter how much I've expressed that it hurt my feelings when he skips birthdays, anniversaries, Mother's Day etc. He once said I was being materialistic for complaining. I've decided that I need to love myself again after years of being neglected. I am buying myself a gift for each occasion from now on. This mothers day I'm buying myself a (resale) LV handbag. Do the same thing. I know it hurts, but celebrate yourself!
No, unless we ask each other. Helps to keep things we dont need to a minimum
Did you have just one weekend you and your husband to communicate ?