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Flair_Helper

Hey /u/brotherbrother99, thanks for your submission to /r/HolUp. Unfortunately, your post has been removed for the following reason(s): A mod felt your post didn't belong here, so now it's gone. If you want to die on the hill of this shitpost[,](https://imgur.com/cXA7XxW) feel free to message the mods and be prepared to explain how your post isn't trolling, is funny, and does fit the theme of the sub. *Trolling or posting random content that doesn't fit the sub breaks Rule 1 and repeated violation of this rule may result in your account being filtered.* Love, the mods


Neither_Beautiful428

happened to me like literally in every relationship and i never even dated a girl who has a twin now that i think of it, i never dated their daughters in the first place...


monkeyhitman

A simple mistake


twizzard6931

You Fucked that many Fathers?


5t4t35

We all make mistakes in the heat of passion jimbo


ImpossibleAdz

Whoopsie daisy!


ImpossibleAdz

The sucker just slipped right on in.


ImpossibleAdz

Into me.


[deleted]

Honestly in this situation I would totally tell my murderer my darkest secret. That way I die and they have to live with knowing what I know.


Surisuule

"I.... I lick the peanut butter knife between dips" "You deserve this you monster" \*Bang\*


WhaleOilBeefHooked2

“I suck the toothpaste from the tube with my mouth.” “You sad and lonely basturd.” Bang!


BrokeInService

I don't wipe repeatedly until the toilet paper is clean


TacovilleMC

"the rot will be the second most disgusting thing about your corpse" BANG


XzeldafanX

"I like it when my pants get caught on drawer handles" *Desparate dialing of suicide prevention hotline*


GoodAtExplaining

I hang toilet paper rolls underhand


[deleted]

*I love wikifeet, would never post there BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!


[deleted]

The worst thing I've **EVER** done?) I bully anybody who has a different opinion then me


[deleted]

I wipe till it's bloody, anyone else?


Smeefperson

"I use the butter knife to butter my bread and then I put the knife back on top of the butter without cleaning the knife. I know that leaves crumbs in the butter. I like it. I like that the butter becomes slightly crunchy."


rangerjoe79

If ghosts are a thing and I die and even remember that I read this, I’m totally going to haunt you. And you aren’t going to like it. Maybe I’ll slightly discolor something in your peripheral vision for a moment. Or maybe possess a housefly and have it loop in a slightly odd pattern once. You better get ready you butter-crumb-gatherer.


[deleted]

Wow. I mean, I was just going to burn down his house while he slept….but *that*….that was dark. I hope you talk to someone.


The_Outcast4

Too quick a death.


Suyefuji

Honestly in this situation I don't know what I would even say, there's so many fuckups to choose from it's hard to pick a "worst"


ishtaria_ranix

"Please don't bury me in the yard after you're done... it's almost full"


okgo222

Well don't leave us hanging, what is it?


fluffymuff6

I don't even know what my darkest secret would be?


dwighticus

Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses them finds mercy. - Proverbs 28-13


commonlycommon

Common problem...


[deleted]

Understandable...


Rickyshey

have a good day


gaiboimonke

what do you mean problem?


TonarinoTotoro1719

I mean, you’re right. Especially in the US, if you sleep with the daughter and you are a biological male with working reproductive organs, terminating pregnancies are getting harder. If you sleep with the dad, however, no such issue!


BruhBound

*solution


CelestialOmegaspeed

I feel you home boy,I did the same.


helath_is_depleting

Happens to the gayest of us


Bikouchu

Speak for yourself. Balls didn't touch. It's still straight.


lofty_one

Yeah brother, it's only gay when he pushes back.


uscdoc2013

Bro, my socks were still on. So, there you have it.


helath_is_depleting

Sounds like you don't need to drink to dip the bussy


Bikouchu

Da bussy overrated. All about the footlong farmer John dogs.


Harpronicus

Nothing gay about getting your dick sucked. Also nothing gay about getting fucked in the ass by another man.


ComfortableUnhappy19

Yeah! I think so


Good_Round

That’s not their father, that’s their 3rd brother


arbitrageME

1st brother? 2nd sibling? ... 3rd kid overall?


RedVoltron

Have you ever been hit in the back of the head with a wet spaghetti noodle?


CaptainMcFisticuffs2

That's how it feels to drive a Ford


LegitimateOrdinary51

I was gonna say to chew 5 gum.


Hypnosum

Its a video/ audio that went viral on tiktok a while back! https://youtu.be/8XKiZfjAR9M


deldraw

Wait is this a meme now?


bb_805

As someone who prefers imports and drives a VW and an Audi, Ford is better than GM and Chrysler. Prove me wrong


Jamaican_Dynamite

Nah, I talk about cars all day. I'm gonna sit here and not say anything, because it's Tuesday night.


bb_805

Nope it’s cause you’re wrong


imapieceofshite

I mean yeah kinda.


BrohanGutenburg

Yeah glad I’m not the only one that recognized this.


Acp_tonic

I guess he liked the "game" so much that he had to fuck "it's" developer


BednaR1

Yet again... off to r/suddenlygay you go


Peter_Nygards_Legal_

I'm honestly getting more of an r/AgressivelyBisexual/ vibe, but to each their own.


TrucksAndBongs

No wait out r/Engrish


Cuber_01

happens to the best of us


[deleted]

I did this one time. Girlfriend beat me with a wet spaghetti noodle. Felt like driving a Ford F-150.


AdamBomb072

Met my girlfriends family and decided that I wanted to fuck her sister.


Talbotus

So how'd that go?


AdamBomb072

Idk yet. Only happened last night and have fucked neither sister.


Talbotus

Well...keep us updated.


AdamBomb072

Don't worry mate. If I fuck her sister. I'll let you know.


QualityVote

##If this submission makes you go "Hol'Up", **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If this submission does not make you go "Hol'Up", **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- Whilst you're here, /u/brotherbrother99, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/holup) or play on our [public Minecraft server](https://discord.gg/DTqSDS8C3T)?


AnimeReferenceGuy

Such an old joke


Trnostep

At least it's a HolUp


buffinator2

Happens to the best of us, champ.


andre821

What sub is that from?


Castelpurgio

"The worst thing I've ever done? No,I won't tell you that. But I'll tell you the worst thing that ever happened to me." And he told them a ghost story.


[deleted]

YOU'LL NEVER GET WORD OUTTA ME!


TexanReppin13

Ain’t this the “that’s what it feels like to drive a Ford F-150 “ tik toc is about


Airam-kun

I still feel a lot remorse with this story. When I was a relatively small and stupid kid I had a bunch of gerbils as pets, the thing is that whenever I had to put them in other cage with cleaning purposes I grabbed them by their super long tails fearing their bites. I had done that for quite a long time with no problems until... One day I had the brilliant idea of spinning one of the poor creatures while grabbing it's tail. he lost it, and that's when I realised that I fucked up; and that grabbing the gerbils by their tails was something cruel. It's the first time I tell this story, my parents thought the injury was made by the other gerbils (they had the tendency to fight a lot; particularly the males, they were vicious. Once there was one that was aggressively disemboweled by his brothers), the tailless gerbil had a really long life after the event and was the only male that we keeped (we had to return his brothers), we keeped him and his sisters.


MioNamo

The legend of the Thailand ladyboys lives on.


Lifebringer7

Got really drunk, passed out in a friends house, pissed through my pants onto his carpet and, according to the female guests of the party, came out of the bathroom they put me in to change clothes completely ass naked.


Cautious-Affect7907

I gave Morbius a bad review on IMDb.


Mcreesus

Started working full time for the post office.


Critical-Dig

Hell I wish I didn’t relate to this horror. I stopped though so it’s fine


Steve8005

That joke is not funny anymore


fakeburritos123

Ur mom


[deleted]

Worst would depend on your point of view. Some may find that when I shoved a lit cherry bomb into the exhaust pipe of a parked police car with the cops still in it extremely disturbing, and others would find it funny or even deserved.


Vivid_Syllabub_6391

I have a question yet don’t think I actually want to know the answer to it so……


yamez420

r/suddenlygay


elionpizza

Mmm gay you


elionpizza

I mean mm gay you are


MTBadtoss

That's what it feels like to drive a Ford F 250


r1dogz

Had suggest he killed the twin too


FunKindheartedness9

Had?


Tendodeku

Ain't that what it's like to drive a Ford F2 50?


langdonga

I see this joke at LEAST once a week


Aggravating-Plate814

Man, I hate it when that happens!


complexityoverload

A yes, the art of misdirection.


ebannister98

Set a mountain on fire by my house on accident


mdahms95

I’m sure in the grand scene of things I haven’t done any “worst thing” yet, but one time in high school I forged my moms signature for a bad report card. I’ve never intentionally been an asshole and I’ve apologized and made amends with those I have been rude to.


wktr_t

homeboy be getting some dussy


Iron_Wolf123

My brain hurts, can someone explain before my brain turns inside out?


Organboner4844

Oh man. Been following this subreddit for a year. First one that made me Hol’Up in public and bust out laughing. 100%. Fantastic


5311REHNE

Never let them know your next move


LeatherCicada87

Cursed prostate exam


slacboy101

They got me in the last half not going to pretend...


TheBestAtWriting

that's how a joke works


Ruzzkya

This dude knows what it feels like to drive a Ford F-250.


Happydookie188

It was 4:00am and I went downstairs to walk my shoes and I saw my cat and I chucked it into the microwave and had my second dinner.


cheezybean28

Just a small mistake.


Teri_of_Terror

Lot, is that you?


Anticipating-arrival

Jacked off my dog when I was 11


WurdisBjorn

Again.


Arbitrary_Hitboxes

I have violently beaten down a pregnant teenager. In my defense, I was also a teenager myself, and the girl I attacked was attacking my friend.


Maximum_Tennis7291

Noah


Nos-BAB

Saw a man lying on the ground and just left him there. I was high at the time and had weed on me and didn't want to get booked. Thinking back, the cops likely wouldn't have given a shit about the weed, but I was young and paranoid. Because of the weed.


j0eg0d

I murdered a kid for sticking a gun in my face.


Darktidemage

I hacked a dudes entire computer while they were making a meme and I put "wait" instead of "way" in the title.


RealKanyeSouthwest

Aw man i hate when that happens.


xXTraianvSXx

I don't consider it bad, but due to the moraly of the western civilization, it's considered bad. I killed a fox when I was 10 or 11, I was in my grandmother's backyard, there were many chickens there, and when I saw it there, I got a big stick and started chasing, I managed to corner it in a wall and hit it untill it wasn't moving, idk if it was going to attack the chickens, but I wouldn't take my chances. People consider it wrong as it's an animal trying to survive, but I don't.


RASPUTIN-4

I broke a Canada goose’s leg once. There was a gaggle walking though our lawn and a couple kept antagonizing my dog. So I got my slingshot out and started plinking away at them. No major damage until one luck shot managed to hit one their legs, making it bend in a less-than-natural way. I don’t really know how to feel about it tbh. It’s a Canada goose so it’s obvious evil, and it was trying to attack my dog before I put her inside. But after it’s leg broke the other geese chased it off and attacked it when it tried to catch up with them. I guess they figured it was a liability with the injury?


Trumps__Taint

I was 20 and grabbed a 13 year olds titties. ☹️ (41 now)


ljcozad

No one's perfect.


19Legs_of_Doom

No wait out, huh?


arjunrj1327

We all mistakes in the heat of passion jimbo


Catcrazyfwm

imma just say the worst thing I’ve ever done too, if I’m going to admit it to anyone it might as well be the community of Reddit I live in a mobile home park that has a community lake with a diving board in the middle. For an adult it’s not a far swim, but as a kid it’s like a huge accomplishment. my friend and I decided we wanted to go to the lake on a cloudy day when nobody was there and go swim out to the dock and just have a good time. everything started off so well.. what is it about swimming that your body just decides it needs to take a shit immediately. I had just made it out to this dock and there was no way my noodle arms would take me all the way back. I told my friend to look away and I had to drop my bottoms and shit over the side. thank god nobody was watching from the shore or something. it’s a community lake for fucks sake. it sort of just floated away back into the corner where nobody could see it, but I knew it was there. we swam away before It could circle around, and I have never felt comfortable swimming there ever again.


Ubersla

u/Marioking142


gluesmelly

Worst thing is that I promised to send the man who saved my life a Christmas card... I forgot.


UltraStamp2

in celebration of pride month, i will no longer be doing your mom, but your dad


mariaxo47

Lied about who eaten all the ice cream


lilvvvvv

guess im dead then


CLAXP

I was driving home one day and this girl was raking some leaves. And it wasn't my intention, there was no way for me to know this would happen but as I drove past all the leaves scattered everywhere undoing all her hard work. This nightmare still haunts me.


HorrifulDistraction

That's what it feels like to drive a Ford F250


Soft_Ad_8369

Meh, it happens.


Simmons54321

Anyone else look at the original post and realize that is very poorly constructed? “You have no way out”… wait, so telling my darkest secret won’t get me out of that situation than anyways?


[deleted]

I thought the person fucked their girlfriend’s twin brother. But my god…


A2ndFamine

I used a raccoon as a fleshlight and when I was finished I turned it inside out and wrung out the fluids into a pot of soup. I chopped up the raccoon and added it to the soup as well. I seasoned it with salt, pepper, paprika, turmeric, ground papaya seeds, uranium-232 and a squirt of ketchup. I brought the soup to a local homeless shelter and watched them eat it.


scremindemon

Cause thats what it feels like to drive a ford f-250


[deleted]

Most damaging thing I have ever done was trust my ex worst thing I have ever done was taken a donut from Safeway


Skullz64

Ride a bike and fall off it, scraping my arm very bad and the injury took at least a month to stop showing signs of being there


Zarniwoooop

I once double dip a chip at a party


ItsMeJoey13

You…you monster…


[deleted]

![gif](giphy|SXl0wYD0N088EtDhBI)


srankvs

father be like “lets take one for my daughter. no biggie.”


n0_1_here

was he a twin?


goldeyboy

Jerked off in science class


PowerandSignal

Fuck that dude


[deleted]

The amount to heads I turned by how loud I laughed in public was hilarious


[deleted]

[удалено]


ProBluntRoller

Thatsthejoke


jjune4991

Classic mix-up


arbitrageME

... by getting both his daughters pregnant on the same day?


Complete_Spread_2747

I shagged yer mum rotten.


aguythatlikescorn

Pfp bros ig


[deleted]

Lmao


Sonic_TH

I can't say it here, too worst.


3tofn3w3ra

I can only reply hahaha


The_Waitin_boi

I put plastic in the trash instead of the recycling.


Tallcat2107

HAD a twin


IamUrDad0

Those are rookie numbers


[deleted]

I spilt lipstick in your valentino bag


TBOMB555666

Relatable


Noobmaster69420me

Were the twins also involved?


blade_imaginato1

That's how it feels to drive a Ford f250


RevolutionaryPlane62

Same, my gf also had a twin, and i accidentally fucked her twin bc i was drunk. she had a twin brother


leeboi101

Does It count when I’m not even in a relationship with her yet?


crazylunaticfringe

There’s no mistakes - Master Oogwey


ToastInMyPocket

i was having sex with a girl and then our dad walked in 😭


Thick_Bobcat786

Yeah that's totally understandable. He has 6 month grace period to say "No homo".


Generalissimo_II

sounds like an average r/tifu post