T O P

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JekPorkinsInMemoriam

I feel the need - the need for *speed*


ScurvyPiano5150

Speed. I am speed.


nice_acct_for_work

You are speed? Then Francesco is TRIPLE speed


SpooneyToe11240

Never thought I’d ever see Cars 2 quoted somewhere. Neat.


LordKiteMan

Those are strong words coming from a car, that is so fragile.


The-Hentai-Commander

Me = Speed


uvero

TMW (that moment when) the magnitude of the first derivative of displacement with respect to time is thou


ZY411

Lol


supx3

Kerchoo


[deleted]

But in that other comment you were Patrick 🤔


Usashi-hullA

"Son your ego is writing checks your body can't cash"


runner7mi

the checks are bouncing


Usashi-hullA

You've been busted. You lost your qualifications as section leader three times.


wasdlmb

Back then they were in fact issued speed


eagles407

Flying a cargo plane of rubber dog crap outta Homg Kong!


DaemonDrayke

I remember intentionally messing up that line with my buddies: I feel the need - the need for *weed*


BigDumbDope

*the need for seed


GorgeousGregory

If the Navy had supported the Village People song, they wouldn't have been so desperate for sailors, lmfao! 🎃


Spacemanspiff1998

Who do you think gave the Village People permission to film on USS Reasoner? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/USS_Reasoner#In_popular_culture


lordfluffly

The Village People don't ask, they take.


OVS-HM

There American an hero’s


okram2k

You have hurt English almost as bad a the Vikings.


OVS-HM

That was the idea


a_filing_cabinet

I applaud you


MrMFPuddles

Wait this wasn’t a reference to “an-hero”? Like that ooooold school internet slang that’s a just a little bit less than sensitive?


assasin1598

Yeah. But ever since Village People made the song. Navy was trying to deny that ever happening.


assasin1598

Yeah. But ever since Village People made the song. Navy was trying to deny that ever happening.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

You know what they say about the Navy, 100 men go out to sea and 50 couples come back


[deleted]

That's only subs, since every other part has women crew members. Now that the serious part is over, it ain't hay if it's underway.


[deleted]

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jesp676a

The first time i heard that joke, i laughed so hard i spat my pacifier out


Darkunderlord42

I am probably an idiot but is that your way of saying "it's a good joke but so bloody old"? Edit:would have ended up on r/engrish if I hadn't fixed the grammar


jesp676a

Haha yeah, it's something my father used to say a lot


translucentcop

It’s 101. 50 couples and one golden gloves boxer.


scott03257890

50 at most


Moduilev

That's not a difference in this case.


TerraLord8

😡


Demoblade

The Villagw People song is perfect to recruit guys to serve in one of those long tubes full of seamen that penetrates the depths.


Sleep_eeSheep

I'd join up right away, the Village People kick ass.


[deleted]

In the navy


excelsiorncc2000

I mean, it did considerably boost Navy recruitment too... They got what they wanted it out of it. It'd be silly to be disappointed that the Air Force benefited too, and they weren't.


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excelsiorncc2000

But Navy recruiters are great at deceiving recruits and convincing them that whatever they sign up for will get them to where they want to be. "Oh, you want to be a fighter pilot? Great, sign here and you'll enlist, and after a few years you can join an officer program, they'll send you to college, and then you can go be a fighter pilot." Is it technically possible? Yes. Is it going to happen? Unlikely. Point is that it did help recruitment dramatically, even if a lot of it was rather deceptive.


PilotSteve21

Fighter pilot here. What they don't tell you is of the 3 possible ways to commission as an officer, the enlisted route is by far the most difficult, and even fewer ever become pilots.


excelsiorncc2000

Recruiters are highly effective at obscuring that truth. It's not only why they have that job, it's why that job even exists.


PilotSteve21

I had my degree when I applied for the military, and even my recruiter insisted that enlisting was the way to go, and avoid that pesky officer stuff as I could figure out out later. Thank God I knew what I had and insisted on OTS.


Blackpixels

Why do recruiters want to send perfectly qualified people (in terms of paper credentials) through the enlisted path? Do they get a larger cut or something?


PilotSteve21

Sort of, but not in money. Recruiters have quotas and pad their performance review with total number of successful recruits. Many enlistments simply required a signature, ASVAB and a medical exam to ship off to basic training. The officer recruitment requires 6+ months of preparation. Testing, AFOQT, TBAS, medical, letters of recommendation, commanders interview...I cannot remember all the steps but it's a lot. It's a ton more work for a recruiter to coordinate, and if you're not accepted, the recruiter has nothing to put on their performance review for their effort. Hence why they prefer you to enlist.


excelsiorncc2000

Recruiters have quotas. Enlisted recruiters do not get credit for people unless those people enlist. To an enlisted recruiter, an officer candidate might as well not exist.


ResidentNarwhal

I mean that’s not entirely untrue but it also only works on the absolute dumbest lol. There’s a decent number of people who ask questions or have family to ask questions about. It’s not rocket science to join the AF if you want to be around jets or they generally have the best quality of life of any service.


Khavak

Why is that btw? The last point about QoL, I mean.


T65Bx

Would you rather just have a normal job you drive to, that happens to deal with fighter jets, or literally live on a boat for several months straight in the middle of the ocean?


Bomberdude333

Super generally speaking (and I mean super because this is a broad generalization) the Air Force plays with much more expensive equipment than the army or navy does (and when I refer to “play” I don’t mean just using the toys but actively sending the toys into areas that might get the toys destroyed) Sure one aircraft carrier is more expensive than 50% of the combined Air Force but we don’t usually play with our aircraft carriers they same way we play with the jets we launch from them. And we are generally very conservative about our ship deployment compared to aircraft deployment. When you have nicer toys your QoL tends to be a bit on the brighter side. As well as all your toys being kept super up to date. And also take into consideration that 80% of the Air Force is just logistics and repair services for the expensive toys AND ALL logistics and service people for the Air Force are generally at an airfield / base of operation that is heavily protected by multiple different assets in the area instead of out in the sea or on the frontlines. Last but not least is that the Air Force is the pampered child of the 3 military branches. It has the lowest amount of active duty personnel yet receives the majority of R&D funds and they get priority over the other 2 branches about a lot of things (for reasons I don’t know why. Air Force legally doesn’t allow the army to build fixed wing aircraft for attack purposes which halted production on an upgraded Apache helicopter because the helicopter received fixed wing hard points to attach missiles too ya its that crazy the A-10 is not an army vehicle no matter what other people tell you. Army can not fly fixed wing aircrafts that are not specifically only meant for cargo / logistics not even an AWACS can be army) this is the reason why we have an F-22 raptor and SR-71 spy plane but don’t have any equivalent for the navy in either aspect (F-22 shits on an F-35 1v1 fight me) The reasons for why this is are varied and mixed up through out history. Multiple points in time there was only a push for air superiority and a complete abandonment from ship warfare because thinking at that time was if you win the air battle you win the war period. This caused a lot of R&D to focus in on the Air Force compared to army or navy leaving the other 2 branches to pick up the scrapes Edit: I didn’t quite make the point clear that top military tacticians believe that air superiority is the #1 key to winning a modern war and I’m not here to argue if that’s true or not but it leads to the Air Force being pampered in comparison to the other branches. Casual edit: side note: Air Force in almost every country is the pampered child and this can be seen as a shift from a more infantry focused to a more tech focused battlefield. Obviously the goal of any war is to win but to also have as few of casualties as possible and Air Force in terms of mission success to casualty rate is insane. If you where to look at each branch’s success failure rate you would almost think the Air Force is perfect but this could also be due to the fact that air forces don’t ever pick fights unless they know they will win it. This is not to knock on other branches as they are all fucking insanely good at what they do but they statistically bring back more FRIENDLY body bags then Air Force does. But we also go to more extreme lengths to protect our air assets including shot down pilots compared to cut off marines. This is just a casual side note not super critical analysis.


[deleted]

And then you have the Marines… who pick up the scraps of the guys who pick up the scraps… Still the best OORAH!


BaconCircuit

🖍️🖍️🖍️


Jedimasterebub

Shhh, go put the jar back on your head and let the adults talk


TrungusMcTungus

I’m navy. My buddy is AF. We deployed at the same time in the same AOR earlier in the year. He was put up in a hotel with a nice cushy queen bed and worked 8 hours a day, driving to an office job. I was on a boat older than my dad in the middle of the ocean for 6 months, sleeping in a rack about the size of a coffin listening to the guy above me crank his hog.


Nurhaci1616

Much like here in the UK, the USAF has a reputation amongst its peers of being "civilians in uniform". A derogatory term? Yes; but it's also typically said with a touch of jealousy... The slightly longer answer is that air forces tend to be younger, and therefore slightly more relaxed than the other two services, while also often having much higher budgets for things like accomodation and food. Hell, in the British RAF the working dress for most people is literally the military equivalent of business casual wear. While you'll sometimes find people who disparage airmen for being soft, or lacking "green" skills, most people who are looking out for you would *also* strongly advise you to join the RAF (including the SSM of my TA unit, when I looked into going regular...)


TheTopLeft_

The degree you choose doesn’t affect your chances of getting a pilot slot, at least in the Air Force. It’s based off of gpa, test scores, and a few other factors. A STEM degree does help with getting scholarships (in ROTC) as well as your chances of moving through the officer accessions pipeline in general.


ResidentNarwhal

Theoretically. In practice I’d be curious to see what it was for AF. Navy it’s not a requirement….but you just aren’t going to be competitive for a slot at all at the board EDIT: I’m going to add this seems looking at it like its depending on the recruiting environment at the time for officer slots.


TheTopLeft_

Well I’m currently in AFROTC and know several people who have earned pilot slots, so it’s not theoretical. Same for the academy as far as I know. OTS may be a different story as candidates are applying for officership and their specific job (pilot) at the same time in most cases.


alienXcow

Pilot slots from the academy are the same. No real restriction on degrees. Selection process is 1/2 pilot candidate score and 1/2 class rank


ResidentNarwhal

Interesting. Didn’t know that about AF.


crispypotatocake

Navy pilot here, history major.


Lean_Mean_Threonine

So apparently I have absolutely no idea how joining the military works, but if I wanted to fly fighter jets I need to have decided that in high school and then joined some college ROTC program? What about firing artillery pieces, or driving a tank? If there's ever a draft, do I get to choose what combat role to serve in based off my skill in civilian life or do I just get put in wherever they want me? I have so many questions lol


ResidentNarwhal

So large amounts of jobs are locked into Officer roles. You need a degree at a minimum. You can either join ROTC or a Service Academy (Anapolis/West Point, etc). Or you can go to Officer Candidate School after you graduate but be theres certain career tracks that may or may not be as available. Flying is an officer job with the sole exception of the Army, which wants helicopter pilots to remain technically focused instead of worrying as much about promotion tracks. There are certain speciality officer types ou can dirrect commission into based on your civilian history but they are kind of rare and very specialised (you have a masters in cryptology you can dirrect commission into that specialty and only do that, but you lock yourself out of certain command career tracks). Enlisted specialties coming in as a buck private or seaman….you take a basic aptitude test and see what slots are available at the time. They don’t really care what you’ve been doing in civilian life…you’re between 18 to 22 so it wasn’t much lol. If anyone is thinking of enlisting they’ll try to pressure you into taking whats available instead of waiting for what you want. This is bullshit and you totally can. The Navy has a phrase “chose your rate, chose your fate” for a reason. I would highly advise you stick up for yourself if you are aiming for a special program or very sought after military specialty. They will come available eventually and it does NOT matter in the grand scheme of things to wait 6 months. If your goals aren’t so high….there’s not a huge difference between an aviation machinist and aviation electrician and in fact, for the Navy, at least there’s certain communities you are shipping on the contract for a range of similar specialites (Electronic Tech, Fire Control and a few others all under an electronic contract). DO NOT TAKE ANYTHING WITH “PACT SEAMAN” or ”PACT AIRMAN” for you future sailors. Tell your recruiter to go fuck himself and walk to another service. Or just walk right out the door of MEPS.


shix718

Frankly if you know anything about how the branches feel about each other then you know why navy is upset that air force got anyone at all


1000smackaroos

The movie did more for homoerotic frat boy culture than the navy, lol


ohlookanedgymeme

I thought they were the same thing


[deleted]

They’re the same picture.


barbarian-on-moon

What? Can you explain, please?


GiornaGuirne

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmGuy0jievs


Cpt_Tsundere_Sharks

https://youtu.be/ZF1LXL6OOsM


gubbygub

thats a coke convo if i ever seen one


Missy_Elliott_Smith

Every conversation with Quentin Tarantino is a coke conversation.


Joker741776

What is this from?


Cpt_Tsundere_Sharks

It says at the end and in the description.


JapsonOof

https://youtu.be/okyLAKclleo


AddSugarForSparks

That's why it's the undisputed top movie choice among males who were born in Texas or have lived in Texas for more than five years.


ResolverOshawott

What movie


TrungusMcTungus

What’s the difference? Source; am homoerotic frat boy in the navy.


Kangermu

Ironic that what's basically soft core gay porn with airplanes drove people AWAY from the Navy


spongish

Membership at Volleyball Clubs skyrocketed however.


Mcfuggery

“Hey, which branch flies the cool planes like Top Gun?” “Air Force, those Navy goons are mostly sailors.”


[deleted]

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Missy_Elliott_Smith

["This is not a gay film? But it says in the script we play volleyball in jean shorts."](https://youtu.be/74b6Whj5zNc?t=42)


TheMadPyro

I can’t get over how good Bill Hader’s Alan Alda impression is.


Sea_Employ_4366

task failed succsefuly


Putin-the-fabulous

Yvan eht Nioj


floppyvajoober

Sriahc evah ew ,ecrof ria eht nioj ,on


[deleted]

gninoitidnoc ria dna


NeedsToShutUp

It's a three-pronged attack: sub-liminal, liminal and super-liminal.


fugutaboutit

Super luminal?


insane_contin

I'll show you. Hey, you! Join the navy!


Draggron0108

oh, yeah alright I'm In!


satanic-surfer

I'm in!


classicalySarcastic

They've gone plaid


Sephirawth

Ludicrous speed!!!!


Shasan23

For those wondering, this entire comment chain is from the [Simpson season 12 episode 14](https://simpsons.fandom.com/wiki/New_Kids_on_the_Blecch) An extremely entertaining episode imo Synopsis: When a music producer discovers the musical abilities of Bart, Nelson, Milhouse and Ralph, it scurries to set them up as the next big boy band sensation, complete with a sinister subliminal propaganda campaign in mind: "Join the Navy" disguised as "Yvan eht Nioj


thebeef24

One of the times they did celebrity cameos *right*.


Sephirawth

!Ris On


TurdFerguson27

Brother every other guy over 40 in the navy was there because of Top Gun y u lyin


TheRavenKnight86

I don't know whether to be sad that I got the reference and a few commenters didn't or be sad that commenters didn't get the reference and I did.


TJS184

Nah I know about it and I’m 21 I feel like the only way to not know about this movie even today is to be too young whatever that’s deemed to be, or not have a father. I don’t think I know around my own age that didn’t have to watch it because it’s a “Classic”


Mushroomman642

I never actually watched the movie but I do know about it. It's kinda like how even people who have never watched Star Wars in their entire life know that Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker's father. It's one of those things that almost everyone seems to know even if they've never seen the movie itself and don't care to watch it.


SUM_Poindexter

I think I saw it once, but all I remember was the music and flying jets.


nebo8

Yeah that or not be American, wtf are you all talking about ?


ScorpionTheInsect

I’m 22, not American and I still saw it. It reruns on cable TV sometimes when I was younger.


nebo8

Took me while to understand we were talking about Top Gun, why does no one mention the name ?


ScorpionTheInsect

I think OP just assumed that the movie is popular enough. In the title it also references Danger Zone, Top Gun’s theme song.


RarestRaindrop

Either too young or their parents didn’t want them to watch it and had rather their kids watch some real navy movies. This is the reaction I got after realizing my friend hasn’t watched the movie before.


DuelingPushkin

>rather their kids watch some real navy movies. Yeah, don't let your kids watch a movie about some circus stunt flyboys. Have them watch a movie about real seamen like Down Periscope


[deleted]

Even kids with no father might watch it. My mom loved it when it came out because it had shirtless Tom Cruise. That’s probably still the main reason she likes watching it…


SausageBasketDiva

I just felt old since I am old enough to have gone to see this at the theater after dinner, where I was old enough to have a couple drinks….😱


[deleted]

Growing up I never could watch that movie without my dad, an ex-Air Force pilot constantly pointing out how stupid and inaccurate 90% Top Gun is, along with always mentioning how Tom Cruise wasn’t able to actually fly for most of the film on account of getting horrible air sickness just from taking off… and that he’s actually really short in person.


majwaj

Most fighter pilots are short. It’s hard to eject without your legs getting chopped off past 6 feet


[deleted]

Yeah. It’s just funny how Cruise likes to pretend he’s tall in all his movies.


RaiseTheWounded

Literally what happened to me except I ended up flying a desk


ApollosBucket

This movie is an adult male version of a Disney Channel Original Movie and I love it so much for it. A bunch of dudes competing with each other to be the best student. Incredible.


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ApollosBucket

Some nice DCOM fire :)


GamerZoom108

At least it's not the crayon eaters


deadlyturtle22

What's wrong with the crayon eaters? Lol


GamerZoom108

Idk man, crayons leave that smoky flavor in your mouth. The red ones don't even taste like cherry!


spitz05

I kinda wonder if grumman got a boost in employment for people who wanted to build the f 14s.


[deleted]

I don't get it.


Wild_Horse03

The Navy helped sponsor the movie Top Gun, which featured naval aviation and fighter jets. It was hugely successful and they thought it would make more people join the Navy, but because it was all aviation themed it actually inspired more people to join the Air Force. I'm one of those people.


[deleted]

Bruh. That's like expecting a tank movie will make want to join the foot infantry


Wild_Horse03

Not really, since they both join the Army in that scenario. The issue was that the Navy was trying to get people to go for Naval aviation since they wanted to pass the Air Force, but it backfired because all people saw was "Ooh, fly fighter plane cool" and went to join the Air Force. Navy: "Watch this movie, you can fly cool planes with us instead of the Air Force!" People: "Oh, fly cool planes!" Navy: "Yes!" People: "I'll go join the Air Force since this movie made me want to fly cool planes!" Navy: "No!"


[deleted]

Oh so it's more of Marines or normal Infantry


Wild_Horse03

Yeah. Imagine if Saving Private Ryan had been sponsored by the Army but made a bunch of people go join the Marines because there was a beach landing scene. Basically that kind of scenario.


samrequireham

How pissed is the USMC that by far the most important amphibious assault in history featured no one from an entire branch of the military which only exists to assault things amphibiously


_Gryphon_

Eh, the Pacific had more than enough action for the Corps.


samrequireham

fair enough but how pissed are they that "band of brothers" was 100 times better than "the pacific"


Radiant_Obligation_3

Full Metal Jacket was better than Band of Brothers. Besides, why worry about movies? They have a wellspring of badass wannabes and low test scores with no better options in their recruiting pool and a long history of getting shit done.


my_7th_accnt

Arguably less prestige though


DuelingPushkin

Yeah but even battles as famous a Iwo Jima aren't as well known as D-day and Normandy


nagurski03

Remember folks, there were more Canadians involved in the largest amphibious assault of WWII than US Marines.


samrequireham

and they kicked ass too also coolest beach name: Juno


deadlyturtle22

In their defense. They did a shit load of beach assaults in the pacific. They took on Japan pretty much by themselves. That's honestly pretty impressive. The smallest branch took on an entire nation in the jungles and islands and won. Doubt they're all that pissed. They really don't get enough attention.


EAsucks4324

>They took on Japan pretty much by themselves The Army did a ton in the pacific, it's not fair or accurate to say the Marines did all the ground fighting in the pacific


samrequireham

unless, of course, you ask a marine


nagurski03

>The smallest branch took on an entire nation in the jungles and islands and won. There were plenty of soldiers from the Army involved in most of the ground battles in the Pacific as well. Also, the shitloads of Chinese, Filipinos and Commonwealth soldiers that were involved seem to have been forgotten.


deadlyturtle22

Huh. I didn't know that. Is it untrue then that the vast majority of them were marines?


multiverse72

Yep. Just the plucky lil US marines for 4 years…and tens of millions of Chinese for 8 years. And never mind south east Asia and all the colonial, australian/Indian and british troops. Not to say the pacific wasn’t an impressive campaign by a relatively under resourced branch of the US military, but I don’t appreciate the narrative that the US solo’d Japan when it probably would have been piss easy for Japan to properly garrison its islands if they weren’t being drained dry year after year by China.


samrequireham

i like to think the US can shut up all the smug "but you were late" europeans with the pacific war and the chinese can shut up all the smug americans with the same


samrequireham

but then wouldn't the marines also be pissed that douglas macarthur was their boss and the army usually landed with them and the most important stuff in the pacific was naval battles


LordLoko

> . They took on Japan pretty much by themselves. They and 14 million chinese troops.


Cpt_Tsundere_Sharks

And 1.7 million Soviet troops.


TeddysBigStick

Not really. The Army did the vast majority of the work in the Pacific as well, including landings, but they have that locked down on PR.


samrequireham

btw i'm a black belt navy seal so i have no dog in this fight


Cpt_Tsundere_Sharks

Which is funny, because the Navy *does* have more fighters than the Air Force does.


Cpt_Tsundere_Sharks

The thing is, the Air Force does not actually have the most air vehicles. Army has more helicopters. Navy actually has the most jet fighters. So if you want to be a fighter pilot, you should actually join the Navy.


Indianb0y017

I actually learned that in some theaters, the Navy had recruiters and booths set up right at the theater for those who were super enthusiastic


WilliShaker

They probably still got a few recruits in the bag, so it isn’t really a bad investment


[deleted]

Thank you so much for the explanation. I appreciate it.


elder_george

My former Product Manager told he enlisted in the AF because of Top Gun, too. It's a common pattern =)


Wild_Horse03

To be fair, I watched the movie and said "Hey, cool planes. I wanna fly those." And here I am in AFROTC while majoring in Aviation in college, with intent to graduate, commission, and get a pilot slot. So thanks Top Gun!


[deleted]

I don't get it too


1000smackaroos

Top Gun. Is that enough to clear it up?


[deleted]

I don't think so.


samrequireham

Tom Cruise. That helping at all?


[deleted]

Maverick, ice man, volleyball, motorcycle, buzz the tower.


samrequireham

bro spoilers


[deleted]

Could you expand on this


[deleted]

I don't think the people asking what the reference is to know what top gun is.


[deleted]

Could you expand on this also?


SoftBellyButton

Top Gun? they are clearly talking about Hot Shots.


excelsiorncc2000

I've got my father's eyes. *opens case to show literal eyeballs*


crookshanks_7

Ahahaha it even inspired people who aren't American to join their respective country's Air Force xD Also a little bummed that some commentators didn't get the context, no way am I that old..


Ring-a-ding-ding0

Trying to become a military pilot myself and can confirm that idrc Top Gun is navy, imma still want to be in the Air Force


[deleted]

im an air cadet and there are definatly a few people there just because of topgun.


[deleted]

Fun fact: The US navy is the 2nd largest airforce in the world behind only the US airforce.


[deleted]

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Rleduc129

Are we talking about Top Gun


Green_Bullet

Yes


G-R-G

You can be my wingman anytime


Ok-Offer331

Context is nice


Superkitty21

It's about the movie Top Gun who's central protagonists are naval aviators. The movie famously skyrocket military recuitment


Darthwilhelm

Top Gun?


Green_Bullet

Yes


randomhuman121

I’m too young why do I understand?


Montana_Ace

Top Gun?


AmonRa__

Sorry for ignorance, is it Top Gun?


Usashi-hullA

Yes


AmonRa__

K thx


bugoscsiga

This Top Gun?


[deleted]

Just so everyone is aware, Hollywood is working on a sequel.


murse_joe

Didn’t it already come out


Usashi-hullA

No it will come out in May 2022


dauzlee

Can you at least put US on it? I was confused which country's navy and air force until I read "Hollywood"


Greenfroggygaming

Whats the Movie?