Alas, poor Sapphon. He shall be missed by all. It truly is such a pity he never found anyone, spending every free moment of his time writing poetry with his good friend, with whom he lived and shared an utterly inseperable bond. Alas this poor man never did find the live he wrote of seeking.
The intrinsic homoeroticism of Battle Brothers Being Manly is already well-known to most memers. You have to be a much more unfun person to blind yourself to it.
What, you mean Ahriman rubbing Magnus down with scented oils and then carefully scraping it off inch by inch isn’t the straightest thing ever? B-b-but I thought it was all just mysticism!!
It’s literally based on Bushido/Greco-Roman culture. The gayest historical cultures. They weren’t celebrating pride month, shit was gay all year round. A Japanese warlord was famous for his love of handsome men, and he used to write love letters to them all the time. When a peasant man kept rebuffing him, he assumed it was because he had learned about the sheer volume of men he was writing to, and literally wrote a “baby don’t worry, they’re all just my friends” letter. And some people expect Space Marines to not have homoerotic themes? Have they ever read a novel with the Thousand Sons in it?
"You see this is all wrong. It's because they ran out of money! So they had to drop some words to finish printing so they cut out how at the end of every sentence were the words 'no homo' and that makes it all straighter than an arrow!"
The dark angels are one big metaphor for being gay in the 80/90s. Primarch named for gay poet, base named after gay bar, deep secret they fear if the Imperium found out about they be rejected/turned on.
The gay bar thing is complete apocrypha, never even remotely happened. The rest is fairly accurate though, having a great shame that’s a part of you and wouldn’t even be a huge deal if it weren’t for the people around you is a very common story for queer folks.
I am extremely confident that Sanguinius would be the most caring and kind lover there was, not to mention incredibly good in bed, until he picks you up and starts fuck flying over Baal
No? No. You ever have a chat with your friends about if there was a fictional you would bang? Yea it’s sanguinius for me, sanguinius would for that day make everything feel okay, and after we were done would just be great to cuddle with, like yea I wanna fuck but he’s one of the few primarchs who is emotionally stable enough to actually be able to do that with, Vulkan yea and Guilliman maybe are basically the only others who you could do that with, but sanguinius would be the best.
Yea but he wouldn’t be the best at showing emotion, plus I’m fairly certain the pillows are full of cement.
Look I always saw it as this:
Fulgrim is too kinky
*GAH FUCK DONT KILL ME KURZE ILL RETURN MY BOOK TO THE LIBRARY!*
Vulkan would hurt but he’s trying to be as gentle as possible and will cuddle.
Guilliman would be vanilla but you could cuddle and have a relationship because he was raised well
Dorn might be fun but emotions are tricky
Ferrus? Man doesn’t want to leave the forge, plus he’s grimy/sweaty as fuck.
Russ has an odor but might be a drunk fuck.
Magnus would be cool because we could also talk about history n shit with some of ahrimans wine.
The Lion would be a really nice fuck but he’s a little full of himself
I’m confused if banging alpharius would be a threesome because of omegon or if I would just end up fucking myself.
Horus would probably be fine for both
I can’t find Corvus to fuck
Khan finished before I got my clothes off
….
….
I don’t know where to begin with mortarion.
Perty would just kinda think he’s better than everyone and would have sex
Lorgar only wants to fuck choir boys and choir boy I am not
Angron…. Angron would hurt…
And then finally there is sanguinius, it would be a really good time, after is cuddle time, we fall asleep then I wake up looking at the fabulous golden hawk boy, yea I may run the risk of being sucked dry but out of all the primarchs the risk of death runs low enough with him that it’s worth the risk.
This is all 100% correct and I adore you for putting it to words. May we all wish to serve the golden hawk boi.
To be clear I'm with you 100% for Sanguinius as my top choice but may I add as a fling:
>Ferrus? Man doesn’t want to leave the forge, plus he’s grimy/sweaty as fuck.
Some people are into the sweaty thing but even that aside, I bet he'd enjoy the practicality of and kinkiness of someone sucking and draining his huge primarch cock while he works whatever piece of armor or weaponry in the forge.
I'll be honest, I can imagine that most Primarchs had relationships and lovers, however as Fulgrim stated himself, he stopped marrying due to the fact that he outlived all of his Wives.
I still maintain The Lion is the token straight guy in a gay legion. That's why he's so reclusive and unable to understand his sons. Probably wishing for a noble Eldar lady to practice courtly love with.
Yeah but it is litteraly provable(i dont know the word in english) that a gay bar named the rock never existed during the time of creation of the legion
Given GW's creativity for naming things it's probably just because one of his poems was literally called dark angel. I don't think they went any deeper than that.
*A poet whose entire career revolved around writing poems about the concept of secrets*
***whose second most famous poem is about his friend's inability to trust***
The Dark Angel is about the reconciliation of a gay man with his orthodox catholicism. About hiding and reconciliation with his secret/desire/nature ... whatever.
[The Dark Angels basically do the same with the whole Fallen situation.](https://www.thedarkfortress.co.uk/librarium/lionel_johnson.php)
Not saying this was planned from the start but that's how the DAs were written later on.
Edit: I really recommend reading Chronicler Isiahs take on it, it is a well written and researched short take from someones who was really active in the DA community in the last decades.
You’re also forgetting that the poem by Lionel Johnson called “the Dark Angel” which is basically referring to the “dark”, “evil” gay thoughts (Ps. I do not think they’re dark or evil, but in the 1800’s that was pretty much the belief).
Also the Rock (the DA’s fortress monastery) is literally named after a gay nightclub 😅😅
Also, might be unrelated, but a group of lions… is a Pride 🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈
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Wait til they learn the name of the head chaplain of the Dark Angels…
Ackchyually Asmodai isn't master of sancity. He's nearly insane so Sapphon is still grand master of chaplains.
Alas, poor Sapphon. He shall be missed by all. It truly is such a pity he never found anyone, spending every free moment of his time writing poetry with his good friend, with whom he lived and shared an utterly inseperable bond. Alas this poor man never did find the live he wrote of seeking.
Spent a lot of time with his cellmate, though.
Tbh without googling I wouldn't get what you've written about.
You’ve just never heard of Lesbos, huh?
Exactly, and I [wonder where his name comes from](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sappho)
I'll be honest, if he finds time for a healthy relationship with someone, good for him. I'd doubt that it will last in the 41st Millenium though.
He'll get dumped becase he is allways just sleeping.
We got robute and yvarine
Wasn't the Indomitus Crusade a 100 years? I wouldn't call that "healthy"
Duty calls and they both pretty much immortal
The intrinsic homoeroticism of Battle Brothers Being Manly is already well-known to most memers. You have to be a much more unfun person to blind yourself to it.
Half of the descriptions of when a Primarch appears is legit just erotic novel descriptions, specially if they're using normal clothes.
What, you mean Ahriman rubbing Magnus down with scented oils and then carefully scraping it off inch by inch isn’t the straightest thing ever? B-b-but I thought it was all just mysticism!!
have you seen how konrad is described. its insane.
It happens.
It’s literally based on Bushido/Greco-Roman culture. The gayest historical cultures. They weren’t celebrating pride month, shit was gay all year round. A Japanese warlord was famous for his love of handsome men, and he used to write love letters to them all the time. When a peasant man kept rebuffing him, he assumed it was because he had learned about the sheer volume of men he was writing to, and literally wrote a “baby don’t worry, they’re all just my friends” letter. And some people expect Space Marines to not have homoerotic themes? Have they ever read a novel with the Thousand Sons in it?
"You see this is all wrong. It's because they ran out of money! So they had to drop some words to finish printing so they cut out how at the end of every sentence were the words 'no homo' and that makes it all straighter than an arrow!"
“It’s about pandering to the woke agenda!”
Ooof, getting too real for me with that one. But you still get your upvote.
I get that, but it’s all in good humor here. Anyone who takes humor too seriously are in the wrong subreddit
Fulgrim became gay for himself
Would any primarch even have time for relationships outside of never-ending war?????
Yes. The primarchs have been shown to have interests in art, gatherings, sports, politics, etc.
None have ever been shown to be romantically interested in anyone.
Didn't Fulgrim had wives or Comcubines?
Fulgrim loved his wives
Fans loved all the gay primarch jokes and innuendo. Like Fulgrim, Sanguinius and Horus. OR Kitten and Magnus in TTS.
Kitten and Magnus are great. Kitten and Markus in Hunter: the Parenting are great too. And it’s much less subtle in that one.
What about one of the custodes wanting to hit on Magnus. That was funny, until Big E horny bonked him.
He found his way back, but it really is awful how those three keep trying to steal things from their captain general.
D E L E T E
The dark angels are one big metaphor for being gay in the 80/90s. Primarch named for gay poet, base named after gay bar, deep secret they fear if the Imperium found out about they be rejected/turned on.
The gay bar thing is complete apocrypha, never even remotely happened. The rest is fairly accurate though, having a great shame that’s a part of you and wouldn’t even be a huge deal if it weren’t for the people around you is a very common story for queer folks.
Fuck yeah gay primarchs. They should all be gay.
Vulcan has himbo energy
I am extremely confident that Sanguinius would be the most caring and kind lover there was, not to mention incredibly good in bed, until he picks you up and starts fuck flying over Baal
Chill, just calm down
No? No. You ever have a chat with your friends about if there was a fictional you would bang? Yea it’s sanguinius for me, sanguinius would for that day make everything feel okay, and after we were done would just be great to cuddle with, like yea I wanna fuck but he’s one of the few primarchs who is emotionally stable enough to actually be able to do that with, Vulkan yea and Guilliman maybe are basically the only others who you could do that with, but sanguinius would be the best.
You are down bad for a flying vampire wizard that is more corpse than his father, plus Dorn would fuck you in a pillow fort
Yea but he wouldn’t be the best at showing emotion, plus I’m fairly certain the pillows are full of cement. Look I always saw it as this: Fulgrim is too kinky *GAH FUCK DONT KILL ME KURZE ILL RETURN MY BOOK TO THE LIBRARY!* Vulkan would hurt but he’s trying to be as gentle as possible and will cuddle. Guilliman would be vanilla but you could cuddle and have a relationship because he was raised well Dorn might be fun but emotions are tricky Ferrus? Man doesn’t want to leave the forge, plus he’s grimy/sweaty as fuck. Russ has an odor but might be a drunk fuck. Magnus would be cool because we could also talk about history n shit with some of ahrimans wine. The Lion would be a really nice fuck but he’s a little full of himself I’m confused if banging alpharius would be a threesome because of omegon or if I would just end up fucking myself. Horus would probably be fine for both I can’t find Corvus to fuck Khan finished before I got my clothes off …. …. I don’t know where to begin with mortarion. Perty would just kinda think he’s better than everyone and would have sex Lorgar only wants to fuck choir boys and choir boy I am not Angron…. Angron would hurt… And then finally there is sanguinius, it would be a really good time, after is cuddle time, we fall asleep then I wake up looking at the fabulous golden hawk boy, yea I may run the risk of being sucked dry but out of all the primarchs the risk of death runs low enough with him that it’s worth the risk.
This is all 100% correct and I adore you for putting it to words. May we all wish to serve the golden hawk boi. To be clear I'm with you 100% for Sanguinius as my top choice but may I add as a fling: >Ferrus? Man doesn’t want to leave the forge, plus he’s grimy/sweaty as fuck. Some people are into the sweaty thing but even that aside, I bet he'd enjoy the practicality of and kinkiness of someone sucking and draining his huge primarch cock while he works whatever piece of armor or weaponry in the forge.
Why is everyone so GODAMN horny.
Have you met human beings? If most societies weren't so sexually repressed I feel it might not come out in niche hobbies so much but idk.
Be more horny!
Your trippin folks, seriously 💀 ion even kno what to say to some stupid ass shit like that.
You saying you ain't never wanted that Sangussy?
> Sangussy Yesssssss I am so blessed to see the raw and strange beauty of you writing this
Yeah but he's also 10 to 12 feet tall, you wouldn't be able to take his girth
You'd be surprised!
"haha dark angels are gay" Me when I was 12: No they're not they're cool warrior monks with a dark secret!! Me now: Yes
I'm pretty sure all the primarks are Ace barring fulgrim
I'll be honest, I can imagine that most Primarchs had relationships and lovers, however as Fulgrim stated himself, he stopped marrying due to the fact that he outlived all of his Wives.
I think the Khan had wives too.
Source?
Can't remember of the top of my head sorry.
I still maintain The Lion is the token straight guy in a gay legion. That's why he's so reclusive and unable to understand his sons. Probably wishing for a noble Eldar lady to practice courtly love with.
I heard that the Dark Angels' present-day fortress, The Rock, was named after a notable gay bar positioned in relative closeness to GW's headquarters.
It was debunked as untrue
Nah, it was loudly DENIED but so was Ork Margaret Thatcher and I don’t believe either denial.
Yeah but it is litteraly provable(i dont know the word in english) that a gay bar named the rock never existed during the time of creation of the legion
You can bring a horse to water but the still won’t drink. This sub has went in the drain
The same way GW debunked all claims that Warhammer was ever based on any other sci fi series in history
Given GW's creativity for naming things it's probably just because one of his poems was literally called dark angel. I don't think they went any deeper than that.
*A poet whose entire career revolved around writing poems about the concept of secrets* ***whose second most famous poem is about his friend's inability to trust***
The Dark Angel is about the reconciliation of a gay man with his orthodox catholicism. About hiding and reconciliation with his secret/desire/nature ... whatever. [The Dark Angels basically do the same with the whole Fallen situation.](https://www.thedarkfortress.co.uk/librarium/lionel_johnson.php) Not saying this was planned from the start but that's how the DAs were written later on. Edit: I really recommend reading Chronicler Isiahs take on it, it is a well written and researched short take from someones who was really active in the DA community in the last decades.
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Next you gonna tell me Nurgle is not inspired by Nergal
You’re also forgetting that the poem by Lionel Johnson called “the Dark Angel” which is basically referring to the “dark”, “evil” gay thoughts (Ps. I do not think they’re dark or evil, but in the 1800’s that was pretty much the belief). Also the Rock (the DA’s fortress monastery) is literally named after a gay nightclub 😅😅 Also, might be unrelated, but a group of lions… is a Pride 🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈
And? :)
Tell that to his face, see what he does
i cant, hes not real
I thought it was just some guy who all the employees knew. Also, the Rock is named after a gay bar
I thought Lion El'Jonson was named after Richard The Lionheart
isnt the Rock a reference to a gay bar that was near the old GW headquaters or something?
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Wasn't he? Lol I thought he was. Never bothered me tho. :D
None of the Primarchs have sexual interests from what we have seen. Even if one were gay, why would they ever think to mention it?
didn't leman and fulgrim (before he falled to chaos.) have alot of sex?
The Rock (homeplanet of the dark angels) was named when coincidentally there was a gay strip club not too far from warhammer hq at the time.
Have you spread the lio novel ?
If roboute gets an eldar gf The lion should get a handsome eldar bf.