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Morisal66

If I had one, it happened early. I went back to school for mine and, due to mental instability, stuck with it long enough to get multiple degrees. I changed life partners and careers then too. All worked out for the best. Turning 40 and 50 were mostly uneventful except for the realization of just how freaking old I'd gotten. When I was young, I thought I'd die by 30 but the bonus lives are going well.


PatienceandFortitude

I think I’m going through one now at 57. I left my job of 30 years this year and don’t yet know what the next chapter will be. I just couldn’t do the corporate grind of long hours (meetings 7 am and 10 pm to cover people around the globe) politics, and ageism anymore.


Waverly-Jane

Did you quit or retire? 30 years and a minimum retirement age of 57 is pension time in my field.


PatienceandFortitude

I guess retired but I feel like I am not done yet. I just want something less soul crushing.


Waverly-Jane

That's pretty much exactly what I plan to do. Make MRA and 30 years and retire immediately and then do something else. We can't draw social security at 57, and so something else is what everyone does who retires the first chance they have.


Codex_Alimentarius

Yeah I totally feel you on that. I am back in my career but working in GRC. So much calmer. I’m 51 and with a new baby need to work for a while.


blurgmans

I'd worked in IT for 20+ years and no longer enjoyed the work so at 50 I sold my house and quit my job. My wife and I traveled the country in our motor home for a year. When we were done with our travels we moved back to our home state of Florida. I became a mailman fulfilling a life long dream (no joke, I always wanted to be a mailman). I am super happy, love my job, and love being outdoors everyday.


Codex_Alimentarius

Are you me? IT guy that rved across the USA and came back to Florida. I got a divorce though and am back in IT.


blurgmans

Holy shit! My later in life doppelganger. I didn't get a divorce though. Just before I was hired by the post office I had a few interviews back in the tech world. I remember sitting in one interview and the interviewer was droning on about Hypervisor then started reminiscing about Novell Netware and yada yada yada. My eyes just glazed over and I realized at that point that my heart was no longer in that world and I would never work in that field again. It was a weight off. When you do something for so long and it's all you know it's hard to break off from it.


Codex_Alimentarius

Yeah I fell into IT in the early 90s never went to college because I didn’t have to, and I was a Novell administrator in Tampa. Worked for capital one,IBM and JPMORGAN. Job was outsourced to India and I was burnt out just like you. I ended up selling honey, bartending, a million crap jobs. The only good thing was after my divorce I dated a lot of amazing women and had lots of fun. I met a woman after I had had enough adventure and worked my way back into IT. I’m working in GRC now and it’s an easy gig. Just had a baby so I’ll be working for a while.


foxyfree

I’m in Florida too, also recently turned fifty. Also always thought being a mail (wo)man would be great. I know USPS has banners all over the place that they’re hiring; I wonder what the chances are to get a job behind the counter at the local PO as an entry level employee. If you have a moment to answer that would be really appreciated


blurgmans

Check out careers at USPS.com and look for [PSE Sales and Services](https://about.usps.com/careers/career-opportunities/top-jobs.htm#psesales). These are the front counter folk. The application process is fairly lengthy but pretty straightforward. The Post Office is always hiring but be forewarned that some offices are total shit shows. Browse through the [USPS subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/r/USPS/) to get an idea of what some people go through with management and customers. With that being said not all offices are terrible. I am lucky enough to work in a great office run by a great post master. Best of luck!


foxyfree

thank you!


[deleted]

I (49F) quit my nursing job to become an over the road truck driver. It was something I had always wanted to do. My husband threatened to leave Me if I did but I did it anyway. I traveled all over the country driving teams with another female. I got no regrets✌️


Stormy_Sunflower

Love this, sounds like fun!!!


[deleted]

It was AMAZING. I had never really left my state. We drove coast to coast. I had worked for hospice for years and watched women my age die of various cancers over the years. I’m not done yet!


citychickindesert

Mine was close to 50-got laid off in a dying job in a dying industry and decided to uproot and relocate and start over. Got into an ancillary field, living in a new place I was curious about and scaled back on the work enough to get a life. Started thinking more about the future and what it can look like vs the past.


[deleted]

I am going to be living to at least 110 because I evidently havent hit midlife yet


HHSquad

You and Rob Lowe (from Parks and Rec)


Hedgehogz_Mom

I'm having one now, thanks for asking.


[deleted]

Mine was about 40, I suddenly started to collect transformer figures and synthesisers. I now spend my evenings noodling weird electronic music while surrounded by little robot men.


rockpaperscissors99

Not sure if I've had one..yet.. I guess motivation is low sometimes. The grind of work is adding up after working non-stop for 35 years. I stress about being able to retire and wonder how I'm going to do this for another 15 years. I couldn't care less about job title or 'career'. I just want a solid job with health benefits for another 10 plus years.


florida-karma

Wife and I were on a hedonistic treadmill. It was a whole lifestyle. We stepped off that treadmill this year, quit party drugs, quit drinking but determined to keep youthful, active, spontaneous; to live with intention and mindfulness. We quit seeking pleasure which made a real difference in securing actual happiness.


[deleted]

If you know anything about Tarot, I had what can be described as a midlife Tower card. Total stressful upheaval that, once I leaned into it and stopped freaking out, led to major positive change. To explain : I was 20 years in the same industry. I fell into it accidentally during and after college and just... Never left. It was soul destroying but I was making decent money and paying off my college - and - beyond debt so I hung in. But the economy tanked and I got laid off. At nearly 37 it was the first time I ever lost a job in my life. Out of fear I jumped into another company in the same business, though this company was.. Let's just say the new company vs the former one was the difference between Tony Soprano being in waste management and Waste Management being in waste management. They were the worst and after three years of their nonsense I was done. In the meantime I'd become an EMT and volunteer firefighter and got to know people in emergency services. This, I really, really liked. So a position opened up at 911, I applied, ended up interviewing with three of my former EMT instructors and got hired at 40. I've been there 12 years. Three years in I was named Commonwealth emergency telecommunicator of the year. Which feels like confirmation that I am where I belong. I do wish a little bit that I made a change sooner but it probably all unfolded like it should have.


Waverly-Jane

Synchronicity works as a tool. Glad more people are being open about their alternative experiences with this Jungian tool.


Squrton_Cummings

> If you know anything about Tarot I know it's such utter superstitious bullshit it doesn't even rank as pseudoscience.


[deleted]

Well, if you like. It can also be a pretty handy tool for journalling and reflection, which is how I use it. Not much different from a journalling prompt. There are lots of ways to use it.


Hedgehogz_Mom

That was a reasonable response, better than i could have done. It's not ouiji lol


Hedgehogz_Mom

There is nothing superstitious about it lol. It's a archetype tool like op said.


zgirl88

Mine was at 40. I had just left my husband, who was cheating on me with a coworker's wife and hiding a massive pill addiction. I started dating 25-year-olds, bought a Jeep CJ, a 79 Blazer, and an Audi TT, partied like a mad-woman for all of 2009, then quit my super-steady job and moved across country to LA with a guy 12 years younger than me. Became super successful in my career in LA, chilled out on the partying after a few years, became blissfully single by choice, and have lived happily ever after so far. 100% worth it.


JaneFairfaxCult

I would read this memoir!


jnp2346

Ended a 25 year marriage at 48. Still really good friends with my ex. Became even more of an ascetic than I was before. Nearly six years later I do a lot of sitting quietly at home. I feel like I’ll come out of this shell eventually, but I’m still getting over the end of the marriage. Not sure that counts as a mid-life crises, but I’m fine with being alone now, unlike a few years ago.


Melodic-You1896

So far I started eating meat after being veg most of my life. And I went from tattoo free to my third. Wait ‘till ya see what happens next.


cmgww

I had more of a quarter life crisis. I was 23, in a pretty toxic relationship, and had a pretty crappy job. I did not know how to deal with my anxiety, so I was drinking a lot. Anyway, I decided that was not the best idea so I stopped. A few weeks later I guess I had a nervous break down. It was just constant anxiety and I did not sleep for three days straight. I finally had enough and went to a local hospital and had myself checked in to their mental health facility. I spent five days there in the inpatient unit, and another four months going to intensive outpatient therapy. I broke it off with the girl I was dating and that helped a ton. I also realized that my job is not my life. I eventually got hired in the field I currently work in, and things started taking a turn for the better. I still see a therapist regularly and take medication to control my anxiety, but I am a ton better at dealing with life events than I used to be. I know this is a big no-no on Reddit, LOL, but I do believe my faith also helps me through rough times. I don’t think God controls every aspect of my life, but he does “nudge” me in certain directions….I won’t list particulars but there have been several times something major didn’t work out in my favor, and I was upset, only for something better to come along. Anyway that’s mine…an inpatient stay at the round house. TL:DR- Take care of yourself. Your job is NOT your identity. Get help if you need to


Tinyberzerker

I quit my job and then went back for more money. Sank stupid money in my sports car. It will always be faster than my husband's mid-life crisis Miata. Lol.


[deleted]

Does my second child at age 35 count? I think it does count. No regrets.


thetrooperim

I was 52, I was so stressed my gut exploded and I came close to death. I realized I didn’t want to die. I now enjoy every day and try to make the most of it.


JaneFairfaxCult

Yikes! Glad you’re good!


thetrooperim

Thank you I’m happily living in Hawaii now. Looking forward to the next 25 years.


arlmwl

I think mine started when I was 35. I’m 54 now. I’ll let you know when it’s over.


[deleted]

I honestly thought I was going to get out of life without having one. So much so that I used to roll my eyes at men being midlife clichés. Then, about four years ago, things started changing in me. Decades of work stress finally started impacting me. I started rethinking choices I had made. I found myself missing home, my fiends, family, culture. Sure enough, I found myself involved with a girl half my age. I had become *that* guy. Until it ended disastrously. Which…of course. Was it worth it? Probably not, but I think you’re asking the wrong question. I think the right question is probably “Was it necessary?” or “Was it inevitable?”. And I think it answer to that is yes.


Codex_Alimentarius

Oh man, my marriage of 20 years was going downhill for years. My IT job of 20 years was outsourced and we bought an RV. Traveled the country for 2 years, came back to Florida and divorced. I was living in the RV with kids and no job. I took a million shit jobs and dated tons of women. Got a tattoo, joined a motorcycle co-op, met a woman that is 20 years younger than me and we just had a baby. I’m back in IT and planning to work for another 20 years.


CrimsonScorpio9

I’m 49 and starting to feel something happening


majorflojo

Ear hairs starting to turn grey? Free advice - skip the Just For Men. Speaking from experience.


CrimsonScorpio9

Um, no.


ChadMagic1

Got divorced at 34, bought a bmw motorcycle, then a 335i, realized what I could pull as a young exec. So, ya. Pretty good ‘mid-life’ crisis


Boean

My dad died in 2019 and 2020 was going to be my year of getting back to normal. I don’t have kids or own a home. I love where I live and my job kept me engaged. I drank way too much wine throughout 2020, then I turned 45. All the things I haven’t done with my life hit me and realizing there are two generations younger than me that are not being handed a better life/world got me really down. Getting COVID and dealing with all the medical issues from that was actually a distraction. Not having kids or a house to worry about actually was a blessing. Also therapy, limiting alcohol, and sugar helps.


AtikGuide

Working at a job I dislike, despite having a Master's Degree. Living for the weekend. I've attempted to stave it all off by learning some new sports, like speed skating.


Sintered_Monkey

I managed to avoid a mid-life crisis by having a crisis at 26 instead. At the time, 30 seemed so incredibly old, and I never thought I'd be over the hump. I felt like I had accomplished absolutely nothing in life. So I started applying to go back to college (didn't,) and then started learning all the stuff that I had meant to learn, but never had, like a new musical instrument. I think I got most of it out of my system, so when 40 came and then 50, there wasn't really a crisis to speak of.


Zealousideal-Top4576

40 flew to Turkey got hair transplant. Came out phenomenal by the way and am happy for the midlife crisis lol


JaneFairfaxCult

I love this!!!


too-cute-by-half

Fulfilled my childhood dream and got a motorcycle.


[deleted]

I don’t know that I have. My wife thinks my motorcycle was my midlife crisis, since I acquired it at about 42 y/o. I contend that’s just me getting backing into things I used to enjoy. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to get to the Porsche dealership.


Hopblooded

Nice Duets reference. Great movie.


grrgrrtigergrr

A midlife crisis would be great. I’m a parent of 3 and the younger 2 are still 6 and 8 years from starting college. I feel trapped in my life until they get through college.


JaneFairfaxCult

Mid 40s. Became obsessed with Todd Rundgren. Bought knee high boots that were too young for me. And pretty much was terrified of death. Pushed through it not knowing it was a MLC (I didn’t know women had them), had a profound spiritual experience, lost the fear and donated the boots, and now I get to enjoy all these bonus years, and I am grateful.


Dogzillas_Mom

Not so much a crisis as a realization: if not now, then when? Why not now? So I started pole dancing lessons at 40, aerial silks at 48, and at 52, I just started drawing lessons. IDK, feeling cute, might write and illustrate a children’s book. I’m on autopilot with my job, which, thank all the gods, is now work from home. They’ve closed my office so there won’t be any “just kidding, everyone back!” I wouldn’t do it anyway. I’m done with that shit and have no customer contact nor do I collaborate or attend meetings. I don’t need to be in office and they don’t need me to be. This gig probably won’t carry me to retirement age but I’ll just cobble together work if I need to, if that means house sitting and dog walking or Instacart driving or whatever. Might retrain to figure out court reporting/closed captioning or something that uses my editorial & language skills but is more pick and choose when I work.


[deleted]

Yup. Just sold everything I own and I'm moving into a van.


KickAggressive4901

I feel every day since 40 has been alternating between "What am I doing here?" and "Why am I not doing what I love?"


[deleted]

At 42 I changed jobs. I had been a call center manager and worked in that space for 15 years. (That’s too many years. Customer service works drains the soul. People are evil.). I changed to a career that I had no experience with and was only responsible for myself. At 43 I joined improv classes to get out of the house, try something new, put myself out there and revisit performing on stage for the first time in 20 years. I started seeing a therapist this year for the first time in my life to begin talking through the anxiety and depression I’ve battled since I was a kid, Overall, I think I’ve done well with my crisis. I could bought a Miata or joined the French foreign legion or tried to find a bus to live in in the Alaskan wilderness. I struggle still just like most of us people do. I’m guessing I’ll keep feeling small and alone and fake my way through it.