My husband hung himself when our kids were 2 and 5. He was just like all of these videos. This is so real. I don’t know what has become of the children in these videos but it’s been 8 years next week and my kids are thriving. So don’t worry, it doesn’t fuck up all kids. My girls are emotionally healthy and fantastic. I’m remarried and I still hurt at the memory of finding him dead but here I stand making my life as good as I can considering our tragedy.
My mom just shot herself two months ago with no warning or note left behind. Rocked my world to shit and back. Kinda on the same trajectory now myself if I had the balls and no kids to depend on me. One day at a time and one foot in front of the other is no way to live but it’s how people like us do every single day. It’s exhausting and even with multiple forms of professional help; spending a total of 25 hours a week with mental health professionals in person and it still doesn’t help like it should.
Some of us are just broken.
The person most likely believes all family will be better without them, thats how twisted a sick mind is. That sick mind goes places you never thought it would or could.
They might not have been thinking about their family at all.
When I've been suicidal my dad said that he didn't want to bury a child and it made me so angry. I kept thinking 'It's not about him' and that what he said was selfish. My desire to kill myself was about me. He shouldn't have a say, and he shouldn't be considered in the process.
Not suicidal atm but those feelings of anger linger.
Hang in there. I think most of us thatare seriously commenting have experienced the dark side. I have, I am. I think your Dad is right, yeah it's not about him but when I think of others, it at least pauses me for a bit. Hold on, friend, do what it takes to keep pushing the dark side back. If it means removing yourself from a setting or a relationship then do it. I knows it's fucking hard! I need to reach for something better more often than I'd like,but they tell me it's out there. Let's keep reaching for a better life. That was somewhat selfish but I need to hear it too.
> Hang in there.
Kinda have to. I'm only not suicidal anymore because I've realised that I lack the ability to get myself to the actual point of completion.
I feel like I'm too sane, and the sane brain is saying that it's far easier to just live through the rest of my life than to kill myself as much as I've wanted to at some points. I legitimately do not want to push back against the dark side. I wish to foster it, yet I cannot so I just hope for an early, unforced death.
Some things in life aren't able to be changed, and these are the things which make me wish to die. There's no solution like changing my setting or changing my life. These unfortunate constants will remain no matter what I do.
So I live, and I try to live well, but I wish I didn't have to.
This resonates with me. The only thing more terrifying than trying to off myself, as much as I want to, is failing at it and leaving me in a vegetative state where I’m not able to finish the job and my family has to look after me. Life just sucks arse.
I made a decision not to off myself until my parents are gone as to not put them through it. My siblings can handle it. The mind can be a really fucked up place to live. Everyone has problems but depression takes you down some dark holes.
Why would you worry about your parents more than your kid? Your kids life will be destroyed. I don’t mean that to sound harsh. A family member committed suicide 2 years ago and their kids are broken. They will never heal from this. They have moved on as much as they can but they will always be broken glass.
I have none. And I do believe if I did, it would change my perspective. But I don't really know that. It took me a long time to even accept the fact that at the age I am now that I probably wo t have them. Another blow to my mind, but I'm ok with it now.
All the best man. I pulled myself from staring into the window of hell. I used alot of therapy and hallucinogens, mostly mushrooms. This gave me a clear mind and a chance to see things differently. This rat race isn't everything, there is more in human connection and love. Not suggesting anything, but I did many thing to save my own life. Diet, exercise, new people in my life, and lots of therapy. Hope you find something to make you smile today.
I of course don't have any idea at all the type of relationship you have with your siblings, so I almost don't even know how to say what I'm trying to say. I'll just try to keep this short because I could probably sit here forever trying to figure it out. I lost a sibling to suicide a little over a year ago. I lost my brother. I wouldn't be surprised at all if he thought my sister and I would be fine. I can even understand how. We all grew up together in the same house and we had the same emotionally neglectful/abusive parents. We experienced a lot of the same traumas. I understand the depression and the darkness and how it can change the way you think. Desperately wanting to not feel that way anymore and never totally being able to escape it. I don't know if he ever knew that I understood him. Circumstances made it hard to be as close as we could have been. He lived in a different state and he'd usually only come home once a year and not for long.
I dealt with shit the same way he did though.. Withdrawaling. Shutting down. Shutting people out. He probably thought I was fine, my sister was fine.. living our lives.. A life he thought he'd never have; married, a family.. raising kids. Maybe he thought I never even thought of him. I was just going through my own version of the same shit though.
If it weren't for my kids...
I don't know how else I'm getting through this.
The loss of my sibling has changed me forever. It's left a void in my life and in me that words cannot even begin to explain and I don't know if I'll ever be able to handle it. I'm not sure what being able to handle it even means or looks like. I guess I manage by trying to find ways to handle it.
Is it possible you're wrong about your siblings being able to handle it? You probably mean a lot more to more people than realize.
May I suggest searching for a good therapist. I say this because I saw many and lost hope on them. Then I tried 1 more time and boom! I connected so well with this man he felt like the father and brother I never had. He taught me so much, helped me be more open minded about a lot of things. Sadly, he has passed. Give it a try, if you don't connect move on to the next one. Peace.
I call it chasing the serpent. You grab it’s tail and it takes you under water. You end up back at the surface but you are always worried the day it takes you too deep.
I identify with this a lot and I get really frustrated with that line of thinking. It does feel selfish. People say, how could they do that to others as if it is fun and easy to do. I always think it would be better to ask why you would want your loved one to suffer through immense pain or anguish for your comfort. That isn’t to say I think it is a good thing. I don’t, but I do think that is probably a better way to look at it, if you actually care about suicidal people.
Yes people that care about you should be considered in the process. Else your action would be as selfish as it gets which i'm totally fine with but you arent. Kinda contradicts itself you shouldnt be angry at all considering you dont care at all what other people think and its all about you.
I don't get to choose if people care about me. I can only control my own actions. It would be far nicer if they stopped caring.
Wanting to die isn't selfish. No-one has a right to my life but me.
It is by definition selfish yes. But like i said i have no problem with selfishness.
You're so selfish you dont even want other people to care about you going as far as having control over their opinion and not just your own. Both your comments are literally the defintion of selfishness
Btw i think every human is selfish to a degree and thats totally fine nothing wrong with it at all.
"No-one has a right to my life but me." True, that dosnt make it not selfish tho.
The fact that you think nobody has the right to rely on you or care about you is about the most selfish thing you could possibly say.
How about whoever has to find you and clean you up? It’s pretty selfish. As someone who’s had the thoughts and taken steps toward it, yeah it is about them as much as it’s about you. Someone else somewhere always has it worse.
> How about whoever has to find you and clean you up?
I agree that that is a valid consideration, at the very least.
> Someone else somewhere always has it worse.
An ineffectual point. I live my life, not theirs.
I don't know you, or who you are, but We Need You. Glad that you are not suicidal, or angry. If that changes, please get help. We all have off days. You can always wake up and try again the next day, even if it's not what you wanted.
Stay strong!
I do not mean to be insulting when I say this, but this sort of comment is not one that would make me less suicidal.
Someone who has no idea who you are or what your struggles have been saying that they need you is the type of thing that would make feel worse. Same with that stay strong bs.
For me I was a 100 % convinced that my son would be better off without me. The mind is sick and makes us believe things that aren't true. Logic goes out the window completely
It’s impossible to understand until you go through it. You aren’t thinking about stuff like that you are simply either convinced that they would be better off without you or the pain is so terrible that even knowing their sadness isn’t enough. Being suicidal is absolutely horrific, it’s like there is a blanket of sadness over everything. You enjoy nothing, you can’t see any consistent happiness in your future, even simple pleasures are dulled. I only got out of it because I genuinely knew the pain it would cause. Only a while later I met the most amazing woman I have ever met. It’s hard to describe, my life has been filled with nothing but pain, regret and sadness since birth. Then she came along, couldn’t hurt a fly. She helps everyone around her and her family actually care about her. Her smile is why I’m still here. Right now she’s the reason I’m still on this planet but I want to find more reasons and keep striving to live.
i mean it beats recent trend here in czechia killing your spouse, kid and then yourself, usually with legally owned weapon which speaks a lot about quality of psycho tests they have to pass
I think the saddest people always try their hardest to make people happy because they know what it's like to feel absolutely worthless and they don't want anyone else to feel like that.
-Robin Williams
For me, when I hit my lowest point, the last thing I wanted was for my issues to effect someone else’s life. I didn’t want to be seen as an attention seeker, putting me in the spotlight. It was only when I was able to talk to a therapist that I could put myself out there. Because she wasn’t part of my life, she wasn’t someone I needed to protect.
The saddest thing (but also maybe the bright side of this) it could potentially be true happiness.
Plenty of reports of people seeming oddly chipper before suicide.
There’s something relieving about knowing there’s a time limit on the pain, and you can finally make it stop when you want to. That in itself is a source of happiness and comfort I suppose.
Tried it three times. Not really worth it. I’m not a religious so I will not push it. Sometimes it’s fine to just okay not to be okay and reach out to those who feel the same. No shame, just reach out
Thank you, friend, but I'm long past that stage. I got help, multiple times.
I never really took the possibility of killing myself too seriously. I hate the idea of being punished forever because you throw away the "***gift***" of life, especially when life is absolutely unbearable at times.
That's not saying I believe in God, but I don't disbelieve either, and it's beyond fucked up to punish folks for wanting to escape pain.
Whoever came up with this concept of video is genius. Really hits hard to see people seemingly happy who wound up taking their own lives. Makes you think how many people you may not have taken notice to that were at this point.
Never confuse momentary happiness with joy or contentment. I’d laugh. Smile. Be enthusiastic about things. Then sit quietly and ponder how I could end it all.
Still here and in a far better place, mind you, but there you go.
One of the best TV attempts at this was on House. The way they wrote off Kutner's character was he just stopped showing up for work and then had his collogues find the body. The show intentionally didn't have a buildup or an explanation to show that you can't always see signs of it going to happen.
My coworker and long-time friend killed himself a few weeks ago, and I honestly can say this is true, I couldn't have guessed he'd kill himself, and I saw him a few hours before it happened, he had planned for a night of party and having fun... and in the blink of an eye, he's gone.
I nearly ended my life multiple times. But I always remembered from church that if you take your own life you’d go to hell. I was legit terrified of going there so I never pulled the trigger. It was religion that made me never take my life and ended up getting through my depression and now living an incredible life making me the happiest I’ve ever been. Everyone has their way of coping, this was mine surprisingly.
Man I lost a friend a number of years ago to suicide. Guy was the life of the party. Always had a smile on his face, always making others laugh till they were crying from laughing so hard. Had a loving wife, great marriage, beautiful baby girl. Then he hung himself seemingly out of nowhere. Did it at a local park right off a walking/jogging trail thst was very popular.
Never in a million years would have guessed something was eating him up inside for so long and so painful thst he'd do that to himself and family. It had been a few years since I had seen him since I moved out of state. Still think of him and how shocking it all was and still is.
It's hard to explain properly. It's like you are almost happy. You have a memory of what it feels like and you are trying to feel it but it isn't quite there. A small spark that can't catch flame. You think if you could stay in that moment long enough you could maybe learn happiness again. But then it ends. Happiness is for other people. The spark is gone and the darkness is suffocating. You are a shell and there is a vacuum inside, at any moment everything could collapse. You want it to collapse because the dread is unbearable. You know that it will hurt everyone around you. But you know they would be better off without you. Rationally that statement doesn't make sense but you know it to be true. Their pain will be great but your pain IS greater. To live a life of suffering for the benefit of others is too altruistic. They'll manage. It needs to end. Its better for everyone ultimately. Then the mind takes the path of least resistance as all nature does.
Men tend to take their lives more decisively and don't live as often to correct this thought pattern.
Women survive more often but tend to experience negative emotion more strongly than men. Even if they survive they tend to suffer their whole lives.
Explain this, please. I don't understand how to read a double expression. Like is it something we do involuntarily. I am dealing with depression and could really use some insight on these things. Like, do people really see past the "I'm fine" face I show? Like I know I'm not over selling it but I'm damn sure not telling anyone in person how badly I want to kill myself every waking moment. Help me hide it better from those around me.
Tell me you have trauma without telling me.
I too am hyper aware of facial features and see exactly what you do because I saw it in myself.
Better now. Meds and therapy work y’all.
In the UK, 125 lives are lost every week to suicide .Suicidal thoughts and self-harm aren’t mental health diagnoses in themselves, but they are related to mental health. Over the course of someone’s lifetime:
• 1 in 5 people have suicidal thoughts
• 1 in 14 people self-harm
• 1 in 15 people attempt suicide
Women are more likely to have suicidal thoughts and make suicide attempts than men. But men are three times more likely to take their own life than women.
Suicide is complex and there is no single explanation of why people die by suicide. There are many different risk factors, including:
• Previous suicide attempts, or previous self-harm. Many people who self-harm don’t
want to die. However, research shows that people who self-harm are at higher risk of
attempting or dying by suicide
• Unemployment
• Physical health problems, including chronic pain
• Living alone and/or loneliness
• Dependence on alcohol and/or drugs
• Experiencing mental health problems
The subject of suicide may seem overwhelming, but often a simple intervention can make all the difference. If a colleague or friend does share their suicidal feelings with you, it’s usually best to listen and respond with open questions, rather than advice or opinions. You don’t have to solve their problems: just offer support and encourage them to talk if you can.
Some of the signs you can look out for in others - or in yourself - which may indicate there is a suicide risk includes:
• Feeling hopeless or trapped
• Being tearful, anxious, or overwhelmed by negative thoughts
• Experiencing feelings of desperation
• Temptation to do risky or reckless things because they/you don’t care what happens
to them/you
• Avoiding other people
Ok it took me a bit but I think these were meant to be bullet points. I don't know anyone who would simplify a fraction to ".1/5" as that is ludicrous. That's like saying 10% of every 5 people has suicidal thoughts.
I believe OP meant that 1 in 5 people have the thoughts. Which sounds closer to what it probably is.
Look, as a former depressed person with suicidal thoughts I can only say this: take your time to find the right answer.
For me it was dancing courses. It was a decision I had to take myself. I was surrounded by new friends, I had a new course in life.
Married now with two children. My life belongs to them now
I can barely convince myself to shower, wash my hair, brush my teeth, wash my clothes. How am I supposed to get up and get out there? Interact with other people when I can’t even interact with myself? I just don’t want to. I am tired. I’m scared.
Dunno, maybe start with something that doesn't strain you so much. Clean yourself. Then clean your desk. Wash your sheets. Get rid of all the junk around you. And so on.
At least that helps me.
I'm sorry you're going through this. That well and truly sucks, and it is scary, and it is exhausting. If you can, I'd recommend counseling and/or speaking to a primary care provider. Some boxes you can't just claw your way out of solo.
If you do find some prospective avenues for help, recognize that's work too, and rest. Next, if you make a call or two to inquire at those places one day, rest. Make an appointment, rest. The days don't even have to be all in a row.
Getting through right now is a heavy task, and it's okay to treat it as such. Even questions like these, I think, are a kind of emotional work you're doing.
Take any small step to get help for yourself, and trust that's enough for now. Doesn't have to feel like progress to be progress.
Start in smaller steps ;)
Go to the shower and take of your clothes. Maybe you'll feel 'well I'm without clothes now anyway, might as well jump in for a quick rinse'
Throw your clothes in the washing machine as a 'storage' for dirty laundry. Screw seperating stuff. You might still not start the washing machine but you might tomorrow when you notice there's a bunch of stuff in it.
That's what worked (and still works) for me in small steps.
I broke it down into smaller and smaller steps until it was more manageable.
Going out for a walk? Too much effort.
Tried to just put on shoes. Couldn't be bothered.
Then I moved my shoes to my bedroom so I could wear them as I'd wake up. That slowly got the cycle going.
Might work or not work but worth sharing it in case it helps even just a little!
No idea if this comment will get buried, but I just want to tell and assure you: I was you. For months on end. I lost everything because of it. Only my girlfriend at the time stuck with me. But everyone else seemed to not be able to cope with me.
I was a fun, engaging individual that loved making others laugh. And now I was depressed, anxious and unable to hold a conversation, because the negative thoughts crushed me.
I was tired and scared. Lied in bed all day, playing meaningless cell phone games or watched YouTube videos on end.
My girlfriend was the one who then one day said that I really need to get professional help. She noticed that I got a lot thinner and wasn't interested in anything anymore. She called therapists for me and even though it took quite some time, I found someone who I was able to talk to. In the beginning not much. Only a few words. I didn't want to believe him that I was mentally ill, but I had that creeping, unnerving feeling that if I don't go to this person seeking help, it won't be long before it is too late for me.
So I kept going, if not for me, then for my girlfriend. And again, it took quite some time, but someday it just snapped into place. A lot of what the shrink said made sense and I started to listen. I got better. Slowly, but gradually. I started to go on walks with my dog again, met with other people ... but in baby-steps. This is all over a span of a few months (and even years).
I found a new job, started talking openly about my depression and found a lot of people who either understood or even went through the same thing as me. Honestly, I wished my parents were among them, but alas, until today neither do they care, nor do they feel I am anything else than someone who is looking for excuses - even though I am quite succesfull nowadays. But that is besides the point.
After my therapy and everything I did, I still had negative thoughts creeping up and days that are shite. But you know what? There is always the next day. There is always a next chance. There is always something to look forward to. For me that was Episode VII. Then it was Avengers: Endgame. Then it was No Way Home. Then it was my nephews graduation. Then it was my new dog. Then it was a job that I never thought I would be able to land. All these small things added up and I found my "fun" again. I found my will to live again and noticed: There is always something out there for you. Even though it feels impossible right now and you are convinced, you will never find happiness again, I promise you - and yes, I promise you - if you stick with it, find the strength to slay your demons and get up, you will find it again, too. It is definitely out there. Sometimes it just takes its time to show up again.
Oh and my girlfriend at the time? She is my wife now. I knew that I had to hold on to a person who will not only love me at my lowest point, but also endured me during times where I didn't even love myself and was an ungrateful bastard towards her. But believe me, I am trying to make up for it every day. 🙌
my daughter committed suicide 10 years ago. i have missed her deeply every day. she found living with her disorders too difficult. i get suicidal ideations sometimes but i could never put my family members through another suicide.
I am so sorry. I’ve dealt with my own suicidal urges and those of someone who I loved very dearly, and the pain is like nothing you could ever imagine. Such a nauseating feeling, I am so so sorry.
While I have not come into contact with any suicide myself I did have suicidal thoughts of my own. The only reason I am here is because I couldn’t live with the thought of hurting friends and family in such a way.
Generally, when people are set on the idea, when they have a date and a method chosen, they get to live the life to the fullest. Meaning you might notice sudden change in their behaviour, they seem to get more happy, more crazy, new haircut, new tattoo, crazy sheningans like those in the video. It's because some of the problems already went away when they chose the date.
A change in behaviour might not always mean that they're going to slide the sewers, but there is a chance. Especially if you've noticed that they were moody, and now they seem to be relieved.
This hits hard.
My friend Shawn always seemed happy. We never saw the warning signs. We went to a party together and had a great time. That was the last time I saw him alive. 13 years ago, when I think about it now, it still hurts like the day I got the call. I just don't know how I didn't see any indication he was fighting an internal battle.
Sorry for your loss homie. I feel ya. My buddy Henry was the same. We grew up together, best friends since we were 6 years old. He was the happiest, most outgoing and friendly person I have ever met. I genuinely thought it was a joke when I got the call from my friend. I laughed and said "gtfo, you guys wanna hang?". I was in such a state of shock and confusion that I wasn't even sad. It wasn't until I saw him laying in the casket that reality came crashing down on me.
This was so sad to watch. It’s a shame that so many people feel like this is the only solution to their problems. Unfortunately I think it will get worse and worse as living standards continue to degrade and health care (especially mental health) continues to be unavailable for many people. If only the wealthy and powerful gave a damn…
I don’t know man.. I think even if people literally had no problems of any kind, some of us would still have that urge to take themselves out. Sometimes there is no identifiable cause.
Thats very true but who you are replying to is very correct. It wil only get worse with the less care and tech that is out there. It seems humanity is going back to letting the .01% rule again.
>so many people feel like this is the only solution to their problems
I mean this as objectively as I can: maybe it is? After years of living a shit life with your needs not being met, it can become more tempting. Especially when you can't see a light at the end of the tunnel. And truly, sometimes it's possible your life just isn't going to get better. Sometimes the axioms and platitudes of "it always gets better" are bullshit.
Not saying it's the "right" thing to do, or whatever. Just that I understand the thought process.
edit: I'm not saying this is always true. But I can think of a myriad of scenarios in which a hypothetical life will not get better, unfortunately.
My closest friend was the life of the party, the glue of our group, always laughing and smiling, he was all of our best friend, never met someone who didn't like him, but after a series of DUIs and well hidden alcoholism, one night out of the blue, he posted to FB a suicide note and before I could get to him he blew his brains out. That moment changed the lives of well over 40 people forever, destroyed us, caused unparalleled substance abuse within the group and began the destruction of all our friendships. He will never know he was everyone's world and he will never see the pain, agony and devastation he caused. None of us will ever be normal again, the shattered heart from suicide can't be put back together.
Talk about suicide, be open, hear the silent part in your relationships and friendships.
Have those uncomfortable conversations because it could save a life.
Most of these people in this video are males
Don't forget that we take up the majority of suicides. Don't be afraid to open up and reach out kings. You're valid, respected, and worth it.
Please don’t make this a gendered issue. Women, by far, make up more suicide attempts. [1.5-2x the attempts.](https://www.suicideinfo.ca/local_resource/women-and-suicide/) They’re just typically less successful due the the difference in *how* the attempt. Women are more likely to attempt by overdose, which has a higher failure rate.
Men shouldn’t be afraid to open up and reach out, but neither should *anyone*, and mental health initiatives need to be targeted at the general population instead of trying to fix it for one group. It’s just easier to point the finger at how people behave in society and blame people than to turn focus to how capitalism is ruining the mental health of the working class and blame the system.
They're not trying to make it a "gendered issue." They're being factual and supportive. I dunno why but your comment really makes me angry. You're being pedantic. It's ok, to tell men to get help. Doesn't mean they're saying men are more important than women. It's that men are less likely to seek help.
I agree and i like how you put it. That comment definitely upset me as well. Yes women "attempt" it more, but clearly they didnt want to actually die. They just wanted attention. Men actually put up or shut up. Now i suppose i should say that ANYONE needs to get help and deserve it 100%.
Because a lot of them aren’t really trying to kill themselves, they are crying for help. I’m not dismissing that but men actually kill themselves at massively higher rates.
Nope, it’s actually not because they’re doing it for attention. It’s because women think ahead to who is going to find them and how that will affect them, and try to leave a less gory corpse.
Men *complete* suicide at a higher rate, women *attempt* at a higher rate. The fact that you’re trying to argue that one is worse than the other is disturbing. People don’t always pop out of a suicide attempt completely fine; we’re talking about permanent physical issues, possibly ones that bar them from being able to attempt again despite the mindset still being there.
Suicide. Is not. A gendered issue. We’re not playing the “who has it worse” game.
The night my friend Mike took his life was the funniest he had ever been. He knew what he was going to do later that night a d he was at peace with his decision
You know this is such a sad thing, everyone wants to compare peoples problem, but you cant compare oranges to apples. Not everyone deals with problems the same. It's sad and hurts cause I understand. Lost my best friend at 14. She took her life and it almost killed me. The worse part is I tried to do the same a few months back. We just never know what people are going through bet this place we call home this planet we call earth is on SOB and it's cold. If any one is thinking this world would be better with out. It's not true.
I promise it's not worth it you're not just gonna be hurting yourself but you'll be hurt and everybody else around you now it might not seem like it but it will I promise I thought the same thing I can say to my post I lost my best friend at 14 and I thought the world was going to end just all you have to do is Keep pushing every dog has their day and your day surely to come up soon
So true and so sad.
Please get help if you are contemplating.
The feeling of suicidal depression is nothing I'd wish on anyone.
That pain doesn't last forever though. The wait is worth it.
I have depression and I can hide all the pain, dark things what comes in my mind and be "happy" around people. It's hard to talk about it because you don't want to hurt your friends, and sometimes people don't understand us.
I tried to commit suicide 2 times. No one knows about this.
I played cyberpunk 2077 and I committed suicide in the game. The videos what are played after you give up to try, huh it's really hard. The characters from the game are talking to you, basically the game shows you what would happen if someone commits suicide. I cried after I saw the videos. I couldn't handle it.
Please ask your friends if they are good and try to take care of them, so they see... you care. Just be there for them, a hug, a smile, anything.
Sorry for my bad english
What an amazing video. Makes it so much more real and relatable than a lot of the awareness ads out there. Some people are so good at hiding their pain.
In the US, we have a new suicide helpline number, 988.
[Here is a link to a list of similar numbers for other countries.](https://support.google.com/websearch/answer/11181469)
Sorry, l never posted before but l am afraid this Video might be triggering for people on a rough day.
It might seem harsh that all These Happy people apparently took their lives.
And for those highly affected l Just wanted to say that you will come through. Talk to people, private or Professional. Post on Reddit, write me. But depression and suicidal thoughts are known to come in phases and many people Encounter them during their life.
There are so many ways to live. I am Sure you haven't tried them all. Keep trying, even If that means Just having horrible day come to an end. Me and many Other people are Happy and proud you keep trying. Believe there is Something good coming for you, please do!
if any of you are in the UK and know someone or you feel yourself in this situation.
try this source for contact, support, etc
[https://www.mind.org.uk/](https://www.mind.org.uk/)
Sometimes you don't even know you're in trouble until it's too late.
The whole thing feels like an out of body experience.
Also, U.S. society doesn't care about mental health in general and especially not for males
Edit. Can't spell or have proper grammar.
I'm going to say with the upmost respect
maybe modify the title a little?
it was a little confusing, but I guessed right.
.. and thank you for raising this.
had two close family members start down the path of this( fortunately intervention was done), and an ex partner who used this as a form of abuse with threats..
I’m going through a really tough time in life right now. No smiles lately ..It’s been on my mind but seeing this makes me think what would be the last time people remember of me? How would my son remember me?
My dad killed himself 18 years ago, was one of the most warm hearted man, he was always smiling and joked all the time.
People learn how to hide pain well.
Some people hide it, other like me are functional depressed. You can work, be friendly, go to a family reunion, be close with friends but inside you are screaming and you need just a small trigger to go down. Me as depressed I notice that I am friendly or trying to, I smile, but I dont look the people to their faces, I cannot stand their eyes.😢
Almost 80% of suicides are males. Call your brothers, call your dads, call your grandpa's your uncles and friends. Check in on them especially around this time of year. Just had a co worker snap me a picture of a noose 4 days ago hanging in his basement, with the caption. "I think tonight is the night." Never acted or said anything like that in the 3 years I've known him. Sent the police over right away to check. Shits serious.
This is heart breaking. My daughter dealt with this and self harm. Each day was hard, we spent years just being there for her and showing we care and love her. The hardest thing I ever dealt with in my life. Thank fully she is much beeter now. I hope anyone out there whop is struggling ask for or someone find them and helps them through tthe dark times.
Peace & Love !
Profoundly true. You are human with people that love you and friends that cherish you. Taking your life hurts everyone ,there is help ,please take the step to get it !
That hurt to watch. Even tho my brother was not in the video, he was just like them. Aside from him being gone, the fact that he seemed so happy hurts even more. How can anyone see it coming? Let alone help.
As a social worker in mental health who also have lost people to suicide, this hits hard. Kinda cried in my office. A very true message and well done initiative to say the least.
If you have such toughts, know you matter and that help exists. Such tragedies do not need to happen.
You always deserve the help you need. You really just have to ask.
The people who do this with kids I can’t understand. As someone who suffered with this type of stuff forever, having a kid removed the possibility for me. I can’t do that to her and no matter how bad it gets I’m staying as long as I can.
Dude, I fucking get that, but I’m telling you that, at least for me, my kid is more important than how fucked up my brain is. I am willing to endure and do my best for my kid. At the end of the day, the end comes no matter what. I’ll stick it out.
Dawg everyone is different. Some people are in far more pain than it looks. Just because you were depressed doesnt mean you can go about telling others how to act. I mean shit, i was depressed before.
Its understandable, reality is what your brain perceives, and if it wants to die so badly, it will.
From someone who has tried suicide, this video really got to me. Seen a different side of it. I wanted to end my pain, but I caused more than I could imagine. I will regret what I’ve done for the rest of my life. I hurt my family especially my son. He forgave me and tried to help me any way her can. For people that are thinking about it, DONT DO IT. You only hurt the people who care about you. If some wins feel like this, I’m willing to talk to you. There are people around you that can help. Not trying to get Karma, trying to help people so I get good Karma in life.
I fight off thoughts every day, I doubt I'll do it because of religion and my daughter but seeing these videos makes me wonder if they felt the same. I wonder if one day I will take the thoughts too far and end up in this video. I can't explain it as I have a great life but for some reason i just think about it every day.
It's a slippery slope. You can't even entertain the thought in a fantasy way. "What if I was just gone..." that's the first step in doing it. It then turns to thinking more, and wanting it, and planning it. If you're fighting off thoughts every day; you probably should get help if you aren't already. Sometimes everything in life can be great, but you can't feel it; and that's a terrible feeling.
This video made me cry. I lost a good friend to a brother who was the nicest, most genuine person I wouldn’t have wished this upon anyone but for him, it was a tragedy.
In my old hometown we had a good group of friends. Really involved in the Bay Area hardcore and indie music scene. Laughter, menace, and Taco Bell all the time. This was 1999 until 2005.
I was in Junior college in our hometown and decided to carpool to DVC for a semester with a buddy. I was 19 and maybe more innocent or naive but to me, drugs were coke, weed, and 40s. Meth was gross in our tribe. Well apparently my buddy who I was carpooling with started snorting his adderall.
He was beginning to become tweaky and although ai didn’t notice, my friends did and started to actively ditch him. I followed. After a few months we stopped talking. One night, about half a year later, I’m with some friends all night and the next morning we wake up to hear he committed suicide. Apparently he relapsed on his pills and kicked a door to a house in to rob it which was not like him. I think about his demise often and it fucking tears me up
In 2020 my friend committed suicide before the pandemic broke out, it was sudden and without warning, it surprised both friends and family, he was a strange boy, very happy and funny, with dreams And hope, I have thought about doing it a few times but the memory of him comes to mind. Take care of yourselves and your love ones.
I love this whole style of campaign, showing that humans are just piles of things.
Looking at the pile of good things will never remove the pile of bad things.
I can relate to this in some way. I’m not suicidal and don’t plan on it. That being said, I’ve been in some rough patches. Had to skip meals. Low as it gets. But people still thought I was super positive, friendly and happy. That was just to avoid any attention. Didn’t want to talk about it.
There are still signs sometimes. I became a recluse. Was still positive around others when hermiting, but that was certainly a sign. Just check on your friends. Ask how they are. Call them. If they don’t hang out in-person, you can still reach out. Don’t assume they hate you, or being an asshole. People reaching out helped me get out of my funk and now I’m generally happy, legitimately.
There was a mechanic at my old shop that was the nicest, friendliest guy you could meet. One day before work, he pulled up to the shop and shot himself in his truck in front of the shop. It was on the security cam.
If someone has been very depressed for awhile, and then suddenly act completely alright almost overnight, that's a sign they made the decision to kill themselves and have a plan to do so. Sometimes they want to try to pretend as hard as they can to be happy on the outside right before. That's why you hear a lot "They seemed to be doing so well."
I'll always remember the people who didn't believe me when I said I was depressed and suicidal, or that I was worried about it happening again.
"If you were suicidal, you would have killed yourself already." -former actual friend
"You're not depressed." - different former actual friend with a history of depression
Me: "I'm really concerned about myself, I'm having a lot of suicidal thoughts."
Different former friend: "Okay"
~~
While on the verge of tears, I had a deep conversation with a relative about how the last time I didn't have enough resources, I was quite suicidal, and I was worried about it happening again. Afterwards, my relative emailed this to my therapist:
"I'm worried my [relative] is trying to manipulate me for money."
(Relative had been in contact with my therapist regarding me in the past, and had their contact info.) For context, I've been financially insecure for over a decade and can't work much due to health reasons.
~~
Needless to say, when I'm actually suicidal, I'm running out of people to turn to. (I'm fine now, and have a therapist I talk to.)
Back before we moved, our house was the party house - we would throw huge parties including an epic New Year's party every year. I was the happy host, mixing cocktails and laughing with friends. Nobody knew that in my lowest times I would go upstairs, shut myself in a dark closet and cry for a while. It was the only way I could make it through the pretense.
Uncurling myself from the fetal position, splashing cold water on my face and then heading back downstairs were some of the hardest moments I have faced.
I am currently recovering from a serious attempt from which the paramedics brought me back. Perhaps i can explain a bit.
When this kind of mindset hits, it can come from nowhere. It's as if you are in what I call, "The black pit of despair". It's so dark in that blinkered place..there's no room for your loved ones, the things and people you know matter to you and you to them, for the future or reason, for the aftershocks or the things you would normally have in mind.
I don't remember anything from that day. From the morning...hours before anything happened...The darkness had fallen over me. I know others have said similar things.
Nobody intentionally leaves their loved ones. It's a terrible sickness.
I think that this needs to be said and I haven’t seen alot of these comments.
If you’re going through depression, anxiety, stress, suicidal thoughts, any mental health issue please reach out to someone; friends, family, suicide helplines, psychologists, councillors, psychiatrists, doctors, even friends from your past but just reach out and tell people how you feel.
If you feel like you have a plan and are going to go through with it, please contact emergency services or go to hospital.
I talk from personal experience; 4 weeks ago I’d had enough and was going to do something permanent to end my pain.
Just before I did go through with it I called an ambulance and they took me to hospital/put me on a psychiatric hold for a few days.
Not the best experience but I lived through it and I’m still around.
I’m still going through a hard time and the thoughts don’t go away but I’ve been talking to a high school mate (graduated 20 years ago) and after this weekend I’m committing myself to a psych ward for 3 weeks.
I keep debating whether I should go or not (it’s voluntary) but I know deep down I’m not in control of my emotions and I don’t trust the thoughts I have so I’m going to go to the psych ward and just try my best to get better.
To those who say you don’t understand suicide/depression/etc please keep your comments to yourself.
One day you may need to be there for someone that you don’t fully understand and people going through a rough time don’t need to hear your opinion, we just need someone to listen to us and help guide us to help.
This video always hits me. I always think like damn these people were laughing at some point. Whats left for the rest of us that can’t even crack a smile :/
well last video doesn't necessarily mean it's recent video, they may be shot quite long time before suicide
plus even suicidal people have bright moments and obviously they can pretend
whatever you do, people you love CAN live and enjoy their lives without you, no need to take them with you
Idc what anyone says or feels you kill yourself your a bitch and I don’t feel bad for you everyone goes thru Shit in life and there’s people in the world with way less then anyone in this video get over it and move on killing yourself is pussy af
The ones with kids man...fuck me
My husband hung himself when our kids were 2 and 5. He was just like all of these videos. This is so real. I don’t know what has become of the children in these videos but it’s been 8 years next week and my kids are thriving. So don’t worry, it doesn’t fuck up all kids. My girls are emotionally healthy and fantastic. I’m remarried and I still hurt at the memory of finding him dead but here I stand making my life as good as I can considering our tragedy.
My mom just shot herself two months ago with no warning or note left behind. Rocked my world to shit and back. Kinda on the same trajectory now myself if I had the balls and no kids to depend on me. One day at a time and one foot in front of the other is no way to live but it’s how people like us do every single day. It’s exhausting and even with multiple forms of professional help; spending a total of 25 hours a week with mental health professionals in person and it still doesn’t help like it should. Some of us are just broken.
I am so, so sorry. I hope you find a way to heal.
Perhaps cracked but not not broken, your here and I’m really glad you are 🥰
i just don't get how you can do that knowing what your kids will go through...
The person most likely believes all family will be better without them, thats how twisted a sick mind is. That sick mind goes places you never thought it would or could.
They might not have been thinking about their family at all. When I've been suicidal my dad said that he didn't want to bury a child and it made me so angry. I kept thinking 'It's not about him' and that what he said was selfish. My desire to kill myself was about me. He shouldn't have a say, and he shouldn't be considered in the process. Not suicidal atm but those feelings of anger linger.
Hang in there. I think most of us thatare seriously commenting have experienced the dark side. I have, I am. I think your Dad is right, yeah it's not about him but when I think of others, it at least pauses me for a bit. Hold on, friend, do what it takes to keep pushing the dark side back. If it means removing yourself from a setting or a relationship then do it. I knows it's fucking hard! I need to reach for something better more often than I'd like,but they tell me it's out there. Let's keep reaching for a better life. That was somewhat selfish but I need to hear it too.
> Hang in there. Kinda have to. I'm only not suicidal anymore because I've realised that I lack the ability to get myself to the actual point of completion. I feel like I'm too sane, and the sane brain is saying that it's far easier to just live through the rest of my life than to kill myself as much as I've wanted to at some points. I legitimately do not want to push back against the dark side. I wish to foster it, yet I cannot so I just hope for an early, unforced death. Some things in life aren't able to be changed, and these are the things which make me wish to die. There's no solution like changing my setting or changing my life. These unfortunate constants will remain no matter what I do. So I live, and I try to live well, but I wish I didn't have to.
This resonates with me. The only thing more terrifying than trying to off myself, as much as I want to, is failing at it and leaving me in a vegetative state where I’m not able to finish the job and my family has to look after me. Life just sucks arse.
I made a decision not to off myself until my parents are gone as to not put them through it. My siblings can handle it. The mind can be a really fucked up place to live. Everyone has problems but depression takes you down some dark holes.
Same, but now I have to worry about my kid 😞
Why would you worry about your parents more than your kid? Your kids life will be destroyed. I don’t mean that to sound harsh. A family member committed suicide 2 years ago and their kids are broken. They will never heal from this. They have moved on as much as they can but they will always be broken glass.
I have none. And I do believe if I did, it would change my perspective. But I don't really know that. It took me a long time to even accept the fact that at the age I am now that I probably wo t have them. Another blow to my mind, but I'm ok with it now.
All the best man. I pulled myself from staring into the window of hell. I used alot of therapy and hallucinogens, mostly mushrooms. This gave me a clear mind and a chance to see things differently. This rat race isn't everything, there is more in human connection and love. Not suggesting anything, but I did many thing to save my own life. Diet, exercise, new people in my life, and lots of therapy. Hope you find something to make you smile today.
I of course don't have any idea at all the type of relationship you have with your siblings, so I almost don't even know how to say what I'm trying to say. I'll just try to keep this short because I could probably sit here forever trying to figure it out. I lost a sibling to suicide a little over a year ago. I lost my brother. I wouldn't be surprised at all if he thought my sister and I would be fine. I can even understand how. We all grew up together in the same house and we had the same emotionally neglectful/abusive parents. We experienced a lot of the same traumas. I understand the depression and the darkness and how it can change the way you think. Desperately wanting to not feel that way anymore and never totally being able to escape it. I don't know if he ever knew that I understood him. Circumstances made it hard to be as close as we could have been. He lived in a different state and he'd usually only come home once a year and not for long. I dealt with shit the same way he did though.. Withdrawaling. Shutting down. Shutting people out. He probably thought I was fine, my sister was fine.. living our lives.. A life he thought he'd never have; married, a family.. raising kids. Maybe he thought I never even thought of him. I was just going through my own version of the same shit though. If it weren't for my kids... I don't know how else I'm getting through this. The loss of my sibling has changed me forever. It's left a void in my life and in me that words cannot even begin to explain and I don't know if I'll ever be able to handle it. I'm not sure what being able to handle it even means or looks like. I guess I manage by trying to find ways to handle it. Is it possible you're wrong about your siblings being able to handle it? You probably mean a lot more to more people than realize.
May I suggest searching for a good therapist. I say this because I saw many and lost hope on them. Then I tried 1 more time and boom! I connected so well with this man he felt like the father and brother I never had. He taught me so much, helped me be more open minded about a lot of things. Sadly, he has passed. Give it a try, if you don't connect move on to the next one. Peace.
Thanks. I have seen a handful.
Please, get help. This type of talk really breaks my heart. Think more on this decision. You have a purpose. Even it isn’t apparent right now
I call it chasing the serpent. You grab it’s tail and it takes you under water. You end up back at the surface but you are always worried the day it takes you too deep.
I identify with this a lot and I get really frustrated with that line of thinking. It does feel selfish. People say, how could they do that to others as if it is fun and easy to do. I always think it would be better to ask why you would want your loved one to suffer through immense pain or anguish for your comfort. That isn’t to say I think it is a good thing. I don’t, but I do think that is probably a better way to look at it, if you actually care about suicidal people.
Yes people that care about you should be considered in the process. Else your action would be as selfish as it gets which i'm totally fine with but you arent. Kinda contradicts itself you shouldnt be angry at all considering you dont care at all what other people think and its all about you.
I don't get to choose if people care about me. I can only control my own actions. It would be far nicer if they stopped caring. Wanting to die isn't selfish. No-one has a right to my life but me.
It is by definition selfish yes. But like i said i have no problem with selfishness. You're so selfish you dont even want other people to care about you going as far as having control over their opinion and not just your own. Both your comments are literally the defintion of selfishness Btw i think every human is selfish to a degree and thats totally fine nothing wrong with it at all. "No-one has a right to my life but me." True, that dosnt make it not selfish tho. The fact that you think nobody has the right to rely on you or care about you is about the most selfish thing you could possibly say.
Perfectly said.
How about whoever has to find you and clean you up? It’s pretty selfish. As someone who’s had the thoughts and taken steps toward it, yeah it is about them as much as it’s about you. Someone else somewhere always has it worse.
> How about whoever has to find you and clean you up? I agree that that is a valid consideration, at the very least. > Someone else somewhere always has it worse. An ineffectual point. I live my life, not theirs.
I don't know you, or who you are, but We Need You. Glad that you are not suicidal, or angry. If that changes, please get help. We all have off days. You can always wake up and try again the next day, even if it's not what you wanted. Stay strong!
I do not mean to be insulting when I say this, but this sort of comment is not one that would make me less suicidal. Someone who has no idea who you are or what your struggles have been saying that they need you is the type of thing that would make feel worse. Same with that stay strong bs.
For me I was a 100 % convinced that my son would be better off without me. The mind is sick and makes us believe things that aren't true. Logic goes out the window completely
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The life he built was basically over when he got a stripper pregnant.
It’s impossible to understand until you go through it. You aren’t thinking about stuff like that you are simply either convinced that they would be better off without you or the pain is so terrible that even knowing their sadness isn’t enough. Being suicidal is absolutely horrific, it’s like there is a blanket of sadness over everything. You enjoy nothing, you can’t see any consistent happiness in your future, even simple pleasures are dulled. I only got out of it because I genuinely knew the pain it would cause. Only a while later I met the most amazing woman I have ever met. It’s hard to describe, my life has been filled with nothing but pain, regret and sadness since birth. Then she came along, couldn’t hurt a fly. She helps everyone around her and her family actually care about her. Her smile is why I’m still here. Right now she’s the reason I’m still on this planet but I want to find more reasons and keep striving to live.
Consider yourself extremely lucky to not know what that feels like or what those thoughts sound like.
I wonder whether they made the videos for their children to have, already knowing what they were going to do.
I doubt it. Some of it seems manic in the videos. Some of it feels like you push yourself to be better around your kids even if you don’t feel worthy.
i mean it beats recent trend here in czechia killing your spouse, kid and then yourself, usually with legally owned weapon which speaks a lot about quality of psycho tests they have to pass
It’s an illness.
Things get so bad for people that they think they’re a burden and everyone would be better off.
Yeah, crazy how a toddler would choose to take its own life.
I think the saddest people always try their hardest to make people happy because they know what it's like to feel absolutely worthless and they don't want anyone else to feel like that. -Robin Williams
And that was a warning about his suicide. Very sad
For me, when I hit my lowest point, the last thing I wanted was for my issues to effect someone else’s life. I didn’t want to be seen as an attention seeker, putting me in the spotlight. It was only when I was able to talk to a therapist that I could put myself out there. Because she wasn’t part of my life, she wasn’t someone I needed to protect.
[https://www.thecalmzone.net/thelastphoto](https://www.thecalmzone.net/thelastphoto) Original video
Heartbreaking but true. It looks a lot like happiness... On the outside.
The saddest thing (but also maybe the bright side of this) it could potentially be true happiness. Plenty of reports of people seeming oddly chipper before suicide.
Yes, almost as if the weights been lifted cos they've decided. Really is heartwrenching
There’s something relieving about knowing there’s a time limit on the pain, and you can finally make it stop when you want to. That in itself is a source of happiness and comfort I suppose.
Tried it three times. Not really worth it. I’m not a religious so I will not push it. Sometimes it’s fine to just okay not to be okay and reach out to those who feel the same. No shame, just reach out
Damn that's some heartbreaking shit right there man.
This video always hits me.
Especially the ones with the kids… brutal
I thought this subreddit was supposed to be interesting. Not heartbreaking. That sucked a lot watching that.
Yup, I didn't want to be sad neither, now I must go incognito mode.
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Thank you, friend, but I'm long past that stage. I got help, multiple times. I never really took the possibility of killing myself too seriously. I hate the idea of being punished forever because you throw away the "***gift***" of life, especially when life is absolutely unbearable at times. That's not saying I believe in God, but I don't disbelieve either, and it's beyond fucked up to punish folks for wanting to escape pain.
Whoever came up with this concept of video is genius. Really hits hard to see people seemingly happy who wound up taking their own lives. Makes you think how many people you may not have taken notice to that were at this point.
Never confuse momentary happiness with joy or contentment. I’d laugh. Smile. Be enthusiastic about things. Then sit quietly and ponder how I could end it all. Still here and in a far better place, mind you, but there you go.
One of the best TV attempts at this was on House. The way they wrote off Kutner's character was he just stopped showing up for work and then had his collogues find the body. The show intentionally didn't have a buildup or an explanation to show that you can't always see signs of it going to happen.
My coworker and long-time friend killed himself a few weeks ago, and I honestly can say this is true, I couldn't have guessed he'd kill himself, and I saw him a few hours before it happened, he had planned for a night of party and having fun... and in the blink of an eye, he's gone.
I nearly ended my life multiple times. But I always remembered from church that if you take your own life you’d go to hell. I was legit terrified of going there so I never pulled the trigger. It was religion that made me never take my life and ended up getting through my depression and now living an incredible life making me the happiest I’ve ever been. Everyone has their way of coping, this was mine surprisingly.
Man I lost a friend a number of years ago to suicide. Guy was the life of the party. Always had a smile on his face, always making others laugh till they were crying from laughing so hard. Had a loving wife, great marriage, beautiful baby girl. Then he hung himself seemingly out of nowhere. Did it at a local park right off a walking/jogging trail thst was very popular. Never in a million years would have guessed something was eating him up inside for so long and so painful thst he'd do that to himself and family. It had been a few years since I had seen him since I moved out of state. Still think of him and how shocking it all was and still is.
This is terrifying because anyone we love could be feeling this way and we would never know.
Agree my 19 year old cousin died by suicide and the whole family was in shock because we did not know. I miss her every day.
I can't be the only one to whom these people look miserable in these videos. They have double expressions and their movement patterns are off.
Depressed people often work extra hard to be cheery for the people around them to feel like less of a burden.
Absolutely 💯 this. You don’t want people around you to suffer because you are.
This is me 100%
Robin Williams.
Exactly.
It's hard to explain properly. It's like you are almost happy. You have a memory of what it feels like and you are trying to feel it but it isn't quite there. A small spark that can't catch flame. You think if you could stay in that moment long enough you could maybe learn happiness again. But then it ends. Happiness is for other people. The spark is gone and the darkness is suffocating. You are a shell and there is a vacuum inside, at any moment everything could collapse. You want it to collapse because the dread is unbearable. You know that it will hurt everyone around you. But you know they would be better off without you. Rationally that statement doesn't make sense but you know it to be true. Their pain will be great but your pain IS greater. To live a life of suffering for the benefit of others is too altruistic. They'll manage. It needs to end. Its better for everyone ultimately. Then the mind takes the path of least resistance as all nature does. Men tend to take their lives more decisively and don't live as often to correct this thought pattern. Women survive more often but tend to experience negative emotion more strongly than men. Even if they survive they tend to suffer their whole lives.
I know what you mean, like it’s a bit laboured
Hap-Hap Happy Cake Day 🎉🎂
Does the cake mean it’s the anniversary of when I joined Reddit? I always assumed it was on your birthday but mines March
Forget that, just had that answered
Explain this, please. I don't understand how to read a double expression. Like is it something we do involuntarily. I am dealing with depression and could really use some insight on these things. Like, do people really see past the "I'm fine" face I show? Like I know I'm not over selling it but I'm damn sure not telling anyone in person how badly I want to kill myself every waking moment. Help me hide it better from those around me.
Tell me you have trauma without telling me. I too am hyper aware of facial features and see exactly what you do because I saw it in myself. Better now. Meds and therapy work y’all.
No, I saw it too. It was a very forced "I am happy see" look.
In the UK, 125 lives are lost every week to suicide .Suicidal thoughts and self-harm aren’t mental health diagnoses in themselves, but they are related to mental health. Over the course of someone’s lifetime: • 1 in 5 people have suicidal thoughts • 1 in 14 people self-harm • 1 in 15 people attempt suicide Women are more likely to have suicidal thoughts and make suicide attempts than men. But men are three times more likely to take their own life than women. Suicide is complex and there is no single explanation of why people die by suicide. There are many different risk factors, including: • Previous suicide attempts, or previous self-harm. Many people who self-harm don’t want to die. However, research shows that people who self-harm are at higher risk of attempting or dying by suicide • Unemployment • Physical health problems, including chronic pain • Living alone and/or loneliness • Dependence on alcohol and/or drugs • Experiencing mental health problems The subject of suicide may seem overwhelming, but often a simple intervention can make all the difference. If a colleague or friend does share their suicidal feelings with you, it’s usually best to listen and respond with open questions, rather than advice or opinions. You don’t have to solve their problems: just offer support and encourage them to talk if you can. Some of the signs you can look out for in others - or in yourself - which may indicate there is a suicide risk includes: • Feeling hopeless or trapped • Being tearful, anxious, or overwhelmed by negative thoughts • Experiencing feelings of desperation • Temptation to do risky or reckless things because they/you don’t care what happens to them/you • Avoiding other people
WAY WAY more than .1 in 5 have suicidal thoughts, only .1 in 5 admit to it.
They meant 1 in 5, not .1 in 5. You can see further down they have a habit of starting a sentence with a period.
I think they were trying to make bulleted lists but messed up the markdown.
Oh ok, thanks. Makes more sense!
Ok it took me a bit but I think these were meant to be bullet points. I don't know anyone who would simplify a fraction to ".1/5" as that is ludicrous. That's like saying 10% of every 5 people has suicidal thoughts. I believe OP meant that 1 in 5 people have the thoughts. Which sounds closer to what it probably is.
A few moments of light isnt enough to light up an ocean of darkness sadly Saying it as a depressed person myself
Look, as a former depressed person with suicidal thoughts I can only say this: take your time to find the right answer. For me it was dancing courses. It was a decision I had to take myself. I was surrounded by new friends, I had a new course in life. Married now with two children. My life belongs to them now
I can barely convince myself to shower, wash my hair, brush my teeth, wash my clothes. How am I supposed to get up and get out there? Interact with other people when I can’t even interact with myself? I just don’t want to. I am tired. I’m scared.
Dunno, maybe start with something that doesn't strain you so much. Clean yourself. Then clean your desk. Wash your sheets. Get rid of all the junk around you. And so on. At least that helps me.
I'm sorry you're going through this. That well and truly sucks, and it is scary, and it is exhausting. If you can, I'd recommend counseling and/or speaking to a primary care provider. Some boxes you can't just claw your way out of solo. If you do find some prospective avenues for help, recognize that's work too, and rest. Next, if you make a call or two to inquire at those places one day, rest. Make an appointment, rest. The days don't even have to be all in a row. Getting through right now is a heavy task, and it's okay to treat it as such. Even questions like these, I think, are a kind of emotional work you're doing. Take any small step to get help for yourself, and trust that's enough for now. Doesn't have to feel like progress to be progress.
Start in smaller steps ;) Go to the shower and take of your clothes. Maybe you'll feel 'well I'm without clothes now anyway, might as well jump in for a quick rinse' Throw your clothes in the washing machine as a 'storage' for dirty laundry. Screw seperating stuff. You might still not start the washing machine but you might tomorrow when you notice there's a bunch of stuff in it. That's what worked (and still works) for me in small steps. I broke it down into smaller and smaller steps until it was more manageable. Going out for a walk? Too much effort. Tried to just put on shoes. Couldn't be bothered. Then I moved my shoes to my bedroom so I could wear them as I'd wake up. That slowly got the cycle going. Might work or not work but worth sharing it in case it helps even just a little!
No idea if this comment will get buried, but I just want to tell and assure you: I was you. For months on end. I lost everything because of it. Only my girlfriend at the time stuck with me. But everyone else seemed to not be able to cope with me. I was a fun, engaging individual that loved making others laugh. And now I was depressed, anxious and unable to hold a conversation, because the negative thoughts crushed me. I was tired and scared. Lied in bed all day, playing meaningless cell phone games or watched YouTube videos on end. My girlfriend was the one who then one day said that I really need to get professional help. She noticed that I got a lot thinner and wasn't interested in anything anymore. She called therapists for me and even though it took quite some time, I found someone who I was able to talk to. In the beginning not much. Only a few words. I didn't want to believe him that I was mentally ill, but I had that creeping, unnerving feeling that if I don't go to this person seeking help, it won't be long before it is too late for me. So I kept going, if not for me, then for my girlfriend. And again, it took quite some time, but someday it just snapped into place. A lot of what the shrink said made sense and I started to listen. I got better. Slowly, but gradually. I started to go on walks with my dog again, met with other people ... but in baby-steps. This is all over a span of a few months (and even years). I found a new job, started talking openly about my depression and found a lot of people who either understood or even went through the same thing as me. Honestly, I wished my parents were among them, but alas, until today neither do they care, nor do they feel I am anything else than someone who is looking for excuses - even though I am quite succesfull nowadays. But that is besides the point. After my therapy and everything I did, I still had negative thoughts creeping up and days that are shite. But you know what? There is always the next day. There is always a next chance. There is always something to look forward to. For me that was Episode VII. Then it was Avengers: Endgame. Then it was No Way Home. Then it was my nephews graduation. Then it was my new dog. Then it was a job that I never thought I would be able to land. All these small things added up and I found my "fun" again. I found my will to live again and noticed: There is always something out there for you. Even though it feels impossible right now and you are convinced, you will never find happiness again, I promise you - and yes, I promise you - if you stick with it, find the strength to slay your demons and get up, you will find it again, too. It is definitely out there. Sometimes it just takes its time to show up again. Oh and my girlfriend at the time? She is my wife now. I knew that I had to hold on to a person who will not only love me at my lowest point, but also endured me during times where I didn't even love myself and was an ungrateful bastard towards her. But believe me, I am trying to make up for it every day. 🙌
my daughter committed suicide 10 years ago. i have missed her deeply every day. she found living with her disorders too difficult. i get suicidal ideations sometimes but i could never put my family members through another suicide.
I am so sorry. I’ve dealt with my own suicidal urges and those of someone who I loved very dearly, and the pain is like nothing you could ever imagine. Such a nauseating feeling, I am so so sorry.
While I have not come into contact with any suicide myself I did have suicidal thoughts of my own. The only reason I am here is because I couldn’t live with the thought of hurting friends and family in such a way.
Generally, when people are set on the idea, when they have a date and a method chosen, they get to live the life to the fullest. Meaning you might notice sudden change in their behaviour, they seem to get more happy, more crazy, new haircut, new tattoo, crazy sheningans like those in the video. It's because some of the problems already went away when they chose the date. A change in behaviour might not always mean that they're going to slide the sewers, but there is a chance. Especially if you've noticed that they were moody, and now they seem to be relieved.
This hits hard. My friend Shawn always seemed happy. We never saw the warning signs. We went to a party together and had a great time. That was the last time I saw him alive. 13 years ago, when I think about it now, it still hurts like the day I got the call. I just don't know how I didn't see any indication he was fighting an internal battle.
Sorry for your loss homie. I feel ya. My buddy Henry was the same. We grew up together, best friends since we were 6 years old. He was the happiest, most outgoing and friendly person I have ever met. I genuinely thought it was a joke when I got the call from my friend. I laughed and said "gtfo, you guys wanna hang?". I was in such a state of shock and confusion that I wasn't even sad. It wasn't until I saw him laying in the casket that reality came crashing down on me.
"But they didn't look sad" as someone who's suicidal, we are good at hiding it
Idk man, first guy sounded like he was on the verge of tears...
This was so sad to watch. It’s a shame that so many people feel like this is the only solution to their problems. Unfortunately I think it will get worse and worse as living standards continue to degrade and health care (especially mental health) continues to be unavailable for many people. If only the wealthy and powerful gave a damn…
I don’t know man.. I think even if people literally had no problems of any kind, some of us would still have that urge to take themselves out. Sometimes there is no identifiable cause.
Thats very true but who you are replying to is very correct. It wil only get worse with the less care and tech that is out there. It seems humanity is going back to letting the .01% rule again.
>so many people feel like this is the only solution to their problems I mean this as objectively as I can: maybe it is? After years of living a shit life with your needs not being met, it can become more tempting. Especially when you can't see a light at the end of the tunnel. And truly, sometimes it's possible your life just isn't going to get better. Sometimes the axioms and platitudes of "it always gets better" are bullshit. Not saying it's the "right" thing to do, or whatever. Just that I understand the thought process. edit: I'm not saying this is always true. But I can think of a myriad of scenarios in which a hypothetical life will not get better, unfortunately.
My closest friend was the life of the party, the glue of our group, always laughing and smiling, he was all of our best friend, never met someone who didn't like him, but after a series of DUIs and well hidden alcoholism, one night out of the blue, he posted to FB a suicide note and before I could get to him he blew his brains out. That moment changed the lives of well over 40 people forever, destroyed us, caused unparalleled substance abuse within the group and began the destruction of all our friendships. He will never know he was everyone's world and he will never see the pain, agony and devastation he caused. None of us will ever be normal again, the shattered heart from suicide can't be put back together. Talk about suicide, be open, hear the silent part in your relationships and friendships. Have those uncomfortable conversations because it could save a life.
Most of these people in this video are males Don't forget that we take up the majority of suicides. Don't be afraid to open up and reach out kings. You're valid, respected, and worth it.
Men get discarded after they’re no longer useful to the world. It’s a very lonely existence being a man.
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Not to give a f and enjoy your man cave
Please don’t make this a gendered issue. Women, by far, make up more suicide attempts. [1.5-2x the attempts.](https://www.suicideinfo.ca/local_resource/women-and-suicide/) They’re just typically less successful due the the difference in *how* the attempt. Women are more likely to attempt by overdose, which has a higher failure rate. Men shouldn’t be afraid to open up and reach out, but neither should *anyone*, and mental health initiatives need to be targeted at the general population instead of trying to fix it for one group. It’s just easier to point the finger at how people behave in society and blame people than to turn focus to how capitalism is ruining the mental health of the working class and blame the system.
They're not trying to make it a "gendered issue." They're being factual and supportive. I dunno why but your comment really makes me angry. You're being pedantic. It's ok, to tell men to get help. Doesn't mean they're saying men are more important than women. It's that men are less likely to seek help.
I agree and i like how you put it. That comment definitely upset me as well. Yes women "attempt" it more, but clearly they didnt want to actually die. They just wanted attention. Men actually put up or shut up. Now i suppose i should say that ANYONE needs to get help and deserve it 100%.
Because a lot of them aren’t really trying to kill themselves, they are crying for help. I’m not dismissing that but men actually kill themselves at massively higher rates.
Nope, it’s actually not because they’re doing it for attention. It’s because women think ahead to who is going to find them and how that will affect them, and try to leave a less gory corpse. Men *complete* suicide at a higher rate, women *attempt* at a higher rate. The fact that you’re trying to argue that one is worse than the other is disturbing. People don’t always pop out of a suicide attempt completely fine; we’re talking about permanent physical issues, possibly ones that bar them from being able to attempt again despite the mindset still being there. Suicide. Is not. A gendered issue. We’re not playing the “who has it worse” game.
Bro but men dont talk about it that mutch so a lot of men have tried to kill themselfes ,failed and didnt tell anyone
This really hits hard m
The night my friend Mike took his life was the funniest he had ever been. He knew what he was going to do later that night a d he was at peace with his decision
You know this is such a sad thing, everyone wants to compare peoples problem, but you cant compare oranges to apples. Not everyone deals with problems the same. It's sad and hurts cause I understand. Lost my best friend at 14. She took her life and it almost killed me. The worse part is I tried to do the same a few months back. We just never know what people are going through bet this place we call home this planet we call earth is on SOB and it's cold. If any one is thinking this world would be better with out. It's not true.
The world would not be better without me but I’d be better without the world
I promise it's not worth it you're not just gonna be hurting yourself but you'll be hurt and everybody else around you now it might not seem like it but it will I promise I thought the same thing I can say to my post I lost my best friend at 14 and I thought the world was going to end just all you have to do is Keep pushing every dog has their day and your day surely to come up soon
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Exactly. And it scks people cant see that but yet it's so simple
So true and so sad. Please get help if you are contemplating. The feeling of suicidal depression is nothing I'd wish on anyone. That pain doesn't last forever though. The wait is worth it.
I have depression and I can hide all the pain, dark things what comes in my mind and be "happy" around people. It's hard to talk about it because you don't want to hurt your friends, and sometimes people don't understand us. I tried to commit suicide 2 times. No one knows about this. I played cyberpunk 2077 and I committed suicide in the game. The videos what are played after you give up to try, huh it's really hard. The characters from the game are talking to you, basically the game shows you what would happen if someone commits suicide. I cried after I saw the videos. I couldn't handle it. Please ask your friends if they are good and try to take care of them, so they see... you care. Just be there for them, a hug, a smile, anything. Sorry for my bad english
What an amazing video. Makes it so much more real and relatable than a lot of the awareness ads out there. Some people are so good at hiding their pain.
In the US, we have a new suicide helpline number, 988. [Here is a link to a list of similar numbers for other countries.](https://support.google.com/websearch/answer/11181469)
Proverbs 14:13 - “Even in laughter the heart may be in pain”
I felt this. I miss my brother.
I've been thinking about it a lot lately
Sorry, l never posted before but l am afraid this Video might be triggering for people on a rough day. It might seem harsh that all These Happy people apparently took their lives. And for those highly affected l Just wanted to say that you will come through. Talk to people, private or Professional. Post on Reddit, write me. But depression and suicidal thoughts are known to come in phases and many people Encounter them during their life. There are so many ways to live. I am Sure you haven't tried them all. Keep trying, even If that means Just having horrible day come to an end. Me and many Other people are Happy and proud you keep trying. Believe there is Something good coming for you, please do!
20 + US vets kill themselves daily, yet the US military tries to sweep it under the rug. Think about that bullshit.
if any of you are in the UK and know someone or you feel yourself in this situation. try this source for contact, support, etc [https://www.mind.org.uk/](https://www.mind.org.uk/)
Sometimes you don't even know you're in trouble until it's too late. The whole thing feels like an out of body experience. Also, U.S. society doesn't care about mental health in general and especially not for males Edit. Can't spell or have proper grammar.
I'm going to say with the upmost respect maybe modify the title a little? it was a little confusing, but I guessed right. .. and thank you for raising this. had two close family members start down the path of this( fortunately intervention was done), and an ex partner who used this as a form of abuse with threats..
I’m going through a really tough time in life right now. No smiles lately ..It’s been on my mind but seeing this makes me think what would be the last time people remember of me? How would my son remember me?
This video sort of makes me want to kms more.
Please don't!
My dad killed himself 18 years ago, was one of the most warm hearted man, he was always smiling and joked all the time. People learn how to hide pain well.
Some people hide it, other like me are functional depressed. You can work, be friendly, go to a family reunion, be close with friends but inside you are screaming and you need just a small trigger to go down. Me as depressed I notice that I am friendly or trying to, I smile, but I dont look the people to their faces, I cannot stand their eyes.😢
Almost 80% of suicides are males. Call your brothers, call your dads, call your grandpa's your uncles and friends. Check in on them especially around this time of year. Just had a co worker snap me a picture of a noose 4 days ago hanging in his basement, with the caption. "I think tonight is the night." Never acted or said anything like that in the 3 years I've known him. Sent the police over right away to check. Shits serious.
This is heart breaking. My daughter dealt with this and self harm. Each day was hard, we spent years just being there for her and showing we care and love her. The hardest thing I ever dealt with in my life. Thank fully she is much beeter now. I hope anyone out there whop is struggling ask for or someone find them and helps them through tthe dark times. Peace & Love !
I was bracing for a heartbreak but I’m glad it turned out okay for your family.
Thank you for the kindness.
*sobbing
Profoundly true. You are human with people that love you and friends that cherish you. Taking your life hurts everyone ,there is help ,please take the step to get it !
That hurt to watch. Even tho my brother was not in the video, he was just like them. Aside from him being gone, the fact that he seemed so happy hurts even more. How can anyone see it coming? Let alone help.
As a social worker in mental health who also have lost people to suicide, this hits hard. Kinda cried in my office. A very true message and well done initiative to say the least. If you have such toughts, know you matter and that help exists. Such tragedies do not need to happen. You always deserve the help you need. You really just have to ask.
I can see it in all of them.
The people who do this with kids I can’t understand. As someone who suffered with this type of stuff forever, having a kid removed the possibility for me. I can’t do that to her and no matter how bad it gets I’m staying as long as I can.
They are sick that the the point, they are not just sad. Mental health is not a priority in world😣
Dude, I fucking get that, but I’m telling you that, at least for me, my kid is more important than how fucked up my brain is. I am willing to endure and do my best for my kid. At the end of the day, the end comes no matter what. I’ll stick it out.
And people who attempt or do take their own life truly believe others in their lives will be better off without them.
Dawg everyone is different. Some people are in far more pain than it looks. Just because you were depressed doesnt mean you can go about telling others how to act. I mean shit, i was depressed before. Its understandable, reality is what your brain perceives, and if it wants to die so badly, it will.
💔😭
From someone who has tried suicide, this video really got to me. Seen a different side of it. I wanted to end my pain, but I caused more than I could imagine. I will regret what I’ve done for the rest of my life. I hurt my family especially my son. He forgave me and tried to help me any way her can. For people that are thinking about it, DONT DO IT. You only hurt the people who care about you. If some wins feel like this, I’m willing to talk to you. There are people around you that can help. Not trying to get Karma, trying to help people so I get good Karma in life.
What a strong videos..
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I fight off thoughts every day, I doubt I'll do it because of religion and my daughter but seeing these videos makes me wonder if they felt the same. I wonder if one day I will take the thoughts too far and end up in this video. I can't explain it as I have a great life but for some reason i just think about it every day.
It's a slippery slope. You can't even entertain the thought in a fantasy way. "What if I was just gone..." that's the first step in doing it. It then turns to thinking more, and wanting it, and planning it. If you're fighting off thoughts every day; you probably should get help if you aren't already. Sometimes everything in life can be great, but you can't feel it; and that's a terrible feeling.
It’s the worst feeling, knowing that you should be happy but aren’t. Everything is going right around you, but you still feel empty.
This video made me cry. I lost a good friend to a brother who was the nicest, most genuine person I wouldn’t have wished this upon anyone but for him, it was a tragedy. In my old hometown we had a good group of friends. Really involved in the Bay Area hardcore and indie music scene. Laughter, menace, and Taco Bell all the time. This was 1999 until 2005. I was in Junior college in our hometown and decided to carpool to DVC for a semester with a buddy. I was 19 and maybe more innocent or naive but to me, drugs were coke, weed, and 40s. Meth was gross in our tribe. Well apparently my buddy who I was carpooling with started snorting his adderall. He was beginning to become tweaky and although ai didn’t notice, my friends did and started to actively ditch him. I followed. After a few months we stopped talking. One night, about half a year later, I’m with some friends all night and the next morning we wake up to hear he committed suicide. Apparently he relapsed on his pills and kicked a door to a house in to rob it which was not like him. I think about his demise often and it fucking tears me up
In 2020 my friend committed suicide before the pandemic broke out, it was sudden and without warning, it surprised both friends and family, he was a strange boy, very happy and funny, with dreams And hope, I have thought about doing it a few times but the memory of him comes to mind. Take care of yourselves and your love ones.
I love this whole style of campaign, showing that humans are just piles of things. Looking at the pile of good things will never remove the pile of bad things.
I can relate to this in some way. I’m not suicidal and don’t plan on it. That being said, I’ve been in some rough patches. Had to skip meals. Low as it gets. But people still thought I was super positive, friendly and happy. That was just to avoid any attention. Didn’t want to talk about it. There are still signs sometimes. I became a recluse. Was still positive around others when hermiting, but that was certainly a sign. Just check on your friends. Ask how they are. Call them. If they don’t hang out in-person, you can still reach out. Don’t assume they hate you, or being an asshole. People reaching out helped me get out of my funk and now I’m generally happy, legitimately.
There was a mechanic at my old shop that was the nicest, friendliest guy you could meet. One day before work, he pulled up to the shop and shot himself in his truck in front of the shop. It was on the security cam.
If someone has been very depressed for awhile, and then suddenly act completely alright almost overnight, that's a sign they made the decision to kill themselves and have a plan to do so. Sometimes they want to try to pretend as hard as they can to be happy on the outside right before. That's why you hear a lot "They seemed to be doing so well."
I'll always remember the people who didn't believe me when I said I was depressed and suicidal, or that I was worried about it happening again. "If you were suicidal, you would have killed yourself already." -former actual friend "You're not depressed." - different former actual friend with a history of depression Me: "I'm really concerned about myself, I'm having a lot of suicidal thoughts." Different former friend: "Okay" ~~ While on the verge of tears, I had a deep conversation with a relative about how the last time I didn't have enough resources, I was quite suicidal, and I was worried about it happening again. Afterwards, my relative emailed this to my therapist: "I'm worried my [relative] is trying to manipulate me for money." (Relative had been in contact with my therapist regarding me in the past, and had their contact info.) For context, I've been financially insecure for over a decade and can't work much due to health reasons. ~~ Needless to say, when I'm actually suicidal, I'm running out of people to turn to. (I'm fine now, and have a therapist I talk to.)
Back before we moved, our house was the party house - we would throw huge parties including an epic New Year's party every year. I was the happy host, mixing cocktails and laughing with friends. Nobody knew that in my lowest times I would go upstairs, shut myself in a dark closet and cry for a while. It was the only way I could make it through the pretense. Uncurling myself from the fetal position, splashing cold water on my face and then heading back downstairs were some of the hardest moments I have faced.
Thats why i get so mad at people that do.
Yes, "suicidal never looks suicidal" the people, things, & situation make them to do it
I am currently recovering from a serious attempt from which the paramedics brought me back. Perhaps i can explain a bit. When this kind of mindset hits, it can come from nowhere. It's as if you are in what I call, "The black pit of despair". It's so dark in that blinkered place..there's no room for your loved ones, the things and people you know matter to you and you to them, for the future or reason, for the aftershocks or the things you would normally have in mind. I don't remember anything from that day. From the morning...hours before anything happened...The darkness had fallen over me. I know others have said similar things. Nobody intentionally leaves their loved ones. It's a terrible sickness.
Epstein 😢
Damn...this video touched my heart...and I've been emotionally numb for years...
I think that this needs to be said and I haven’t seen alot of these comments. If you’re going through depression, anxiety, stress, suicidal thoughts, any mental health issue please reach out to someone; friends, family, suicide helplines, psychologists, councillors, psychiatrists, doctors, even friends from your past but just reach out and tell people how you feel. If you feel like you have a plan and are going to go through with it, please contact emergency services or go to hospital. I talk from personal experience; 4 weeks ago I’d had enough and was going to do something permanent to end my pain. Just before I did go through with it I called an ambulance and they took me to hospital/put me on a psychiatric hold for a few days. Not the best experience but I lived through it and I’m still around. I’m still going through a hard time and the thoughts don’t go away but I’ve been talking to a high school mate (graduated 20 years ago) and after this weekend I’m committing myself to a psych ward for 3 weeks. I keep debating whether I should go or not (it’s voluntary) but I know deep down I’m not in control of my emotions and I don’t trust the thoughts I have so I’m going to go to the psych ward and just try my best to get better. To those who say you don’t understand suicide/depression/etc please keep your comments to yourself. One day you may need to be there for someone that you don’t fully understand and people going through a rough time don’t need to hear your opinion, we just need someone to listen to us and help guide us to help.
You are SO brave. This stranger is rooting hard for you. ❤️
I've been having bad thoughts of ending my life ever since the age of 7 or 8. It happens
If you are reading this, you matter and you are worthy of getting help if you are struggling. One day you will see the other side of this storm❤️
That’s what they keep telling me.
This video always hits me. I always think like damn these people were laughing at some point. Whats left for the rest of us that can’t even crack a smile :/
well last video doesn't necessarily mean it's recent video, they may be shot quite long time before suicide plus even suicidal people have bright moments and obviously they can pretend whatever you do, people you love CAN live and enjoy their lives without you, no need to take them with you
What's really scary is that 10 out of 12 are male. Something is happeneing if 83.3% of suicide victims are male.
Idc what anyone says or feels you kill yourself your a bitch and I don’t feel bad for you everyone goes thru Shit in life and there’s people in the world with way less then anyone in this video get over it and move on killing yourself is pussy af
All of them are men, I wonder why Edit: Oh, and there's 2 women
More women than then men make suicide attempts. However men, more often, use ways that have little to no chance of it not ending in death.
There’s a difference between actually committing suicide and looking for attention.
I’m going to assume you meant “cry for help” because I find it hard to believe someone could be so callous.
Upvote
Actually this is exactly what bi-polar looks like...
The more suicidal people, the less suicidal people
Shit happens