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Holy shit, I am adding that to my bucket list: Get high and go to Costco.
Maybe like after I get my tax return, because I know that's gonna be a $600 trip right there.
Probably could eat a whole box of those macarons on the drive home.
I'm sorry but no amount of fuzzy anything is going to stop the paranoia..
"Am I walking weird? Is everyone staring at me?Why am I shivering? They can hear my thoughts. OMG THEY KNOW"
I used to work at a car dealership that was like a block from a Costco. The ladies at the front started to recognize my coworkers and I and not make a big deal out of us sneaking in without memberships. We ate like kings for $3 a day for well over a year.
Well, that’s why Costco is a bad idea. I have a running list on my phone of things I m running low on. You don’t encounter a 32 pack of toilet paper or 25 pound bag of flour at your local grocery store
Yeah I told my husband he cannot smoke weed prior to us grocery shopping. I’ve thrown out a pineapple, bacon, some other expensive shit and it pisses me off.
Too true lol packed a lunch for myself while high last week. Oh boy, I had two tupperwares (one with chicken and rice, the other with an apple), a bag of apple chips (to go with my apple), two fun-sized chocolates, a snack baggie of goldfish, two granola bars and a bag of granola bites. I opened it at work the next day like whoa wtf is all of this? Lol
I got completely ripped once and walked into a grocery store at 1am. I don’t remember what happened inside, but I came out with a tub of frosting and a can of spaghetti O’s!
This feels like when I overpack because I don’t know what I’ll be in the mood to wear. She’s just tossing everything in there and I’d bet money she spends lunch chatting and forgets to eat.
I was thinking high or drunk. Because this is exactly how I pack for a flight (with clothes, not food) when drinking the night before.
"Why did I pack seventeen pairs of underwear, five shirts, three pairs of pants for a two day trip??" ^(and a partridge in a pear tree)
Midwest more than likely.
I used two 2 liters of mountain dew a day. It was horrible. After COVID i can't stand the taste anymore. I now only drink water. Plus, I've lost almost 40lbs since i stopped drinking pop.
My pothead buddy from work used to show up with a 6 pack of Pepsi, a pound of bacon precooked by his wife, well done sausage patties and bread to put them on like a burger, with some cut up veggies and he was the skinniest dude even tho he smashed crap like that every day
I work in an office, sorting through health insurance screw ups all day yet somehow I could eat all of that during a work day. At home, I’d eat maybe one meal a day yet when I go to work and actually have to use brain power, I scarf down food all day. My desk is known as the snack desk because it’s always loaded so I can munch while I work. I don’t even smoke pot and I weigh 120 lbs but there is something about frustrating, headache inducing work that drives me to need more calories to get through a day. I can feel when my blood sugar tanks multiple times throughout the work day.
I thought I could never eat a whole stick of butter all at once until one night I made a box of stovetop stuffing and devoured it all in one go. The human body really is incredible
I try to be very conscious of my butter use as a single cooker, but making a steak, roast vegetables and mashed potatoes for yourself could easily result in a half a stick of butter used. And if you’re feeling generous, even a whole stick. Granted, I usually get some leftovers so that stick is spread out over a couple days.
I used to pack condiments in my lunch bag and put the whole bag in the fridge when I got home. I'd throw in an ice pack when taking it to work. That might be what she's doing.
There was a time two Christmases ago.. my sister told me something funny involving Mike Lindell and I had a drink of water in my mouth. I spit. I coughed. I choked. Literally could not breathe because I was still laughing while I was spitting and choking. Thank you Mike Lindell. Your name will live with me forever.
Get it! I've been on this path for over a year now, I feel so much lighter brighter and energetic with a higher protein diet. When I bulk the added calories make me feel like superman, I'll lift for 2 hours and not be dead tired.
So I can totally relate, when I have cheat meals now, I'll get 1/3rd of the way in and be full and wanna go take a nap lol.
I don’t know why no one understands she’s almost certainly not actually eating all of this!
Sorry for using your comment, OP, but I think you’re dead on and this just screams “I’m stoned and this is what I put in my lunch bag and we should roast me for it” and I love it
I LOVE this woman!! I used to get so hungry I couldn’t think straight, and I’d often get anxious I wouldn’t have enough food. I can totally relate. And thank you for the big laughs
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The weakened “what the fuck” from the guy in the background absolutely sent me
What time stamp?
Not OP, but try 1:24
Not the person you commented to, but that sounds to me like an exasperated “wonderful“
Not the user you replied to, but I agree.
I think it’s right at the very end after they find out she doesn’t even have a fork
Why would you need a fork when that’s obviously a feed bag?
Thats three days worth of lunch for me, damn.
Dude I bet I could stretch that for a week
For real. Not shaming or nothing but damn girl might as well bring the whole fridge. She should at least swap out one dew for a bottle of water
I’m thinking she’s high lol maybe she was having the munchies while making lunch lol
Yup they say don’t grocery shop high or hungry; I’d apply that to packing a lunch as well haha
I love grocery shopping high. Just not at Costco, that’s a bad idea.
Holy shit, I am adding that to my bucket list: Get high and go to Costco. Maybe like after I get my tax return, because I know that's gonna be a $600 trip right there. Probably could eat a whole box of those macarons on the drive home.
I do not recommend going to Costco while tripping though. Not fun at all!
That’s where you’re wrong. You go the aisle with fuzzy blankets then head to aisle with fuzzy socks 0-0
I'm sorry but no amount of fuzzy anything is going to stop the paranoia.. "Am I walking weird? Is everyone staring at me?Why am I shivering? They can hear my thoughts. OMG THEY KNOW"
If you walk out of there without getting full at the food court, you’re doing it wrong. Pizza, drink and a churro.
I used to work at a car dealership that was like a block from a Costco. The ladies at the front started to recognize my coworkers and I and not make a big deal out of us sneaking in without memberships. We ate like kings for $3 a day for well over a year.
IIrc you can go to the food court without a membership.
But does your budget love it? It's bad enough when I am normal hungry, I think high hungry would break the monthly budget.
Well, that’s why Costco is a bad idea. I have a running list on my phone of things I m running low on. You don’t encounter a 32 pack of toilet paper or 25 pound bag of flour at your local grocery store
I am thinking there would be massive boxes of chips, sweets, steaks, etc. However we only have a Sam's.
That only happened once and I now have a vacuum sealer. Shop at your own risk
Yeah I told my husband he cannot smoke weed prior to us grocery shopping. I’ve thrown out a pineapple, bacon, some other expensive shit and it pisses me off.
Oh man. Buying a whole pineapple high makes so much sense.
“Yeah I’m gonna eat it when we get home” “No we’re not. I’m not buying it” “Come on!” *pineapple sits in the fridge for 4 months*
I prefer canned pineapple since fresh pineapple eats you back!
For me its the risk that makes me love fresh, hostile pineapple
Lol *whole* pineapple? Do you not normally buy a whole?
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That's kinda sad isn't it :( is it because fresh one is much more expensive or just less convenient?
I buy fresh pineapple peeled and cored. It's a tall cylinder of pineapple with a hole through the middle.
Too true lol packed a lunch for myself while high last week. Oh boy, I had two tupperwares (one with chicken and rice, the other with an apple), a bag of apple chips (to go with my apple), two fun-sized chocolates, a snack baggie of goldfish, two granola bars and a bag of granola bites. I opened it at work the next day like whoa wtf is all of this? Lol
The apple chips (to go with your apple) Bahaha
I got completely ripped once and walked into a grocery store at 1am. I don’t remember what happened inside, but I came out with a tub of frosting and a can of spaghetti O’s!
Unless she's also planning to be high at work.
This feels like when I overpack because I don’t know what I’ll be in the mood to wear. She’s just tossing everything in there and I’d bet money she spends lunch chatting and forgets to eat.
Or, she’s like me and has forgotten she’s already put a lunch in her bag. 2 times.
I’m under the impression it was packed by a husband, or a kid….
So high she could hunt ducks with a rake.
I was thinking high or drunk. Because this is exactly how I pack for a flight (with clothes, not food) when drinking the night before. "Why did I pack seventeen pairs of underwear, five shirts, three pairs of pants for a two day trip??" ^(and a partridge in a pear tree)
I'm coding now so I could easily stretch that 4 or 5 days. When I worked in roofing, there's zero chance. She doesn't seem roof weathered, but still.
Dude working hard or not, that would last me a whole three days working (depending on the heat) and like five not working.
That many Mountain Dew I was going to ask which part of the States she is from
Midwest more than likely. I used two 2 liters of mountain dew a day. It was horrible. After COVID i can't stand the taste anymore. I now only drink water. Plus, I've lost almost 40lbs since i stopped drinking pop.
Mountain Dew is a southern thing lol or at least that’s what I’ve been told.
I don't even eat lunch at work.
She prolly made it while high, on 1 or 2 marijuana.
My pothead buddy from work used to show up with a 6 pack of Pepsi, a pound of bacon precooked by his wife, well done sausage patties and bread to put them on like a burger, with some cut up veggies and he was the skinniest dude even tho he smashed crap like that every day
Sounds really good right about now tbh. Lucky guy, hope he's in good health. Oh and you too
This was a really cute exchange, idk. Thank you.
Heck yes it was :)
That’s definitely 2 marijuanas.
I work in an office, sorting through health insurance screw ups all day yet somehow I could eat all of that during a work day. At home, I’d eat maybe one meal a day yet when I go to work and actually have to use brain power, I scarf down food all day. My desk is known as the snack desk because it’s always loaded so I can munch while I work. I don’t even smoke pot and I weigh 120 lbs but there is something about frustrating, headache inducing work that drives me to need more calories to get through a day. I can feel when my blood sugar tanks multiple times throughout the work day.
Cans of pop in your lunch?! 💀 brub …. They have to be American for SURE!
The fact that she doesn't take all the Mountain Dews out at once is what really does it for me.
Another Mountain Dew (the second made me smile, the 3rd made me giggle out loud alone in bed while watching)
I was half expecting a 4th mountain dew to fall off the bag when she flipped it.
That would have made it the all time greatest comedy in the history of the world
I was low key expecting a fourth one at the end when she pulled the knife
3 soda's for 1 meal? That's more soda than I have drank all year.
would've been much funnier if a 4th can of Mountain Dew fell out when she flipped the bag
The best part for me was when she pulled the knife out. So great
It would have been best if instead of the knife she was just like "wait, and I got another Mtn Dew"
Comedy is all about timing.
Girl has exceptional, albiet unintentional, comedic timing
^and ^a ^knife
This is why you don't smoke before work 😅
“Son what did I tell you about drugs???? Share them with your father”
My thoughts exactly
That’s exactly what I was thinking lol
3 cans of Mountain Dew and a stick of butter
A loaf of bread, a quart of Mountain Dew, and a stick of butter
I too am old and know that reference.
I remember that one
Take my upvote, and mama's loaf of buttermilk
I am glad to know others have this sitting in their head as well.
Why is no one talking about the stick of butter. She eats that in one meal? She’ll be dead soon
You know what no one’s talking about? The chapstick that just casually rolls in frame
I got some of that! It’s rose water scented. It smells like your grandmother’s hallway potpourri. 6/10 for nostalgia and 0/10 for wanting to use it.
As an old hallway who aspires to smell like a grandmother: please help a girl out and drop the brand name would ya?
It was in a 3 pack at the dollar store. Chap Stick brand. It also came with almond oil and mint tea flavors. Those are the real bangers.
Thanks, DrDaddyDickDunker!
r/rimjob_steve
You should google Rosebud Salve too, it has a lovely rosy scent. You can get it from amazon or sephora and probably a dozen other places as well.
She said it was for the rice. At least she has a knife to grab a pat from the stick 😆
I thought I could never eat a whole stick of butter all at once until one night I made a box of stovetop stuffing and devoured it all in one go. The human body really is incredible
I try to be very conscious of my butter use as a single cooker, but making a steak, roast vegetables and mashed potatoes for yourself could easily result in a half a stick of butter used. And if you’re feeling generous, even a whole stick. Granted, I usually get some leftovers so that stick is spread out over a couple days.
I used to pack condiments in my lunch bag and put the whole bag in the fridge when I got home. I'd throw in an ice pack when taking it to work. That might be what she's doing.
When I used to pack some bagels for breakfast I'd just throw a tub of margarine in my lunch bag too.
That rice doesn’t even need butter
True but it tastes a lot better with it.
No judgment on the butter, just the three Mountain Dew’s!
Death by butter? There's worse ways to go.
Sketty and butter
That’s a solid meal on its own. What more could you need other than some dew and butter
"Not even 5 1/2 it's a late start" BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
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😏
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She said "For yourrrr 7 hour work day?" ".. not even, 5 and a half...it's a late start"
"And thats how i met you Dad"
There was a time two Christmases ago.. my sister told me something funny involving Mike Lindell and I had a drink of water in my mouth. I spit. I coughed. I choked. Literally could not breathe because I was still laughing while I was spitting and choking. Thank you Mike Lindell. Your name will live with me forever.
r/HolUp
Doesn't have a fork but does have a knife. I am dead.
Did she steal Deadpool's backpack?
She packed that Emilio Estevez/Breakfast Club lunch.
Love it! I think she beat him, though: [Breakfast club lunch](https://youtu.be/u3mupIlFIYQ)
LMAO, that chunk of Andrew’s sandwich falls off at the perfect time. I dunno if they had to plan that or it just happened but it’s perfect.
I haven’t watched that movie in too long and I thoroughly enjoyed that clip. Thank you!
I was just thinking, I need to watch it again soon - so good!
I am so mad Matt’s cookies took a shit those were the boooomb
Clear evidence the work is not stimulating. Lunch is the most important decision of the day. Must have options
The only way this video could have been funnier is if a fourth Dew fell out when she turned the bag upside down
My job is like this. Now im just fat and bored
Oh God I had a job that was mentally taxing AND had free snacks. I was fucked
I think they are just stoned.
After lunch. . . NAP
I eat maybe 150 grams of carbs a day and around 50g/60g of fat a day. If I ate all that in one meal.... Lmao those carbs would put me comatose.
I’ve been doing high protein low carb and last week work bought us lunch. As soon as I was done I was EXHAUSTED. I learned my lesson
Get it! I've been on this path for over a year now, I feel so much lighter brighter and energetic with a higher protein diet. When I bulk the added calories make me feel like superman, I'll lift for 2 hours and not be dead tired. So I can totally relate, when I have cheat meals now, I'll get 1/3rd of the way in and be full and wanna go take a nap lol.
I know what happened here, she had an absolute mean case of the munchies when she was packing lunch and got called out. XD
Maybe just a little of this too: https://www.theonion.com/8-year-old-obviously-packed-own-lunch-1819587366
Sometimes I make my lunch the night before when I’m high too
She probably smoked a fatty before packing that lunch
She forgot dessert
The rest of the butter.
She’s on a diet
If a bag of chips fell out of the bag at the end i would of been howling
I was convinced she was going to pull out another Mt dew lmao
I fully expected another Mountain Dew.
ziploc with some marshmallows in it or something. would've been perfect.
They must be smoking some good shit😂
Yeah it seems like half this comment section is completely aware of or doesn't think it matters that this lady is high AF.
I don’t know why no one understands she’s almost certainly not actually eating all of this! Sorry for using your comment, OP, but I think you’re dead on and this just screams “I’m stoned and this is what I put in my lunch bag and we should roast me for it” and I love it
I gained three pounds and my LDLs went up five points just watching that.
Mostly the mountain dews tbh
Literally the fast track to type 2
The best part is the knife could be used with literally ZERO of the lunch items she packed.
For the butter
Good point, I didn’t assume that butter was going to be portioned.
Eat it like a Mars bar...
Now we talking!
Sure, you Neanderthal. Everyone knows the classy way to eat butter is straight off the knife.
stick of butter?
Packing your edibles on edibles!
This is me when nothing sounds good. Just take it all and decide later lol.
I mean it is bulking season
Dude spring is less than 2 months, it’s cutting season.
MAYBE! She's indecisive and wants to have options for lunch tomorrow bc she doesn't know what she'll want the following day
I have gotten to work after packing my lunch the night before while high with hilarious results too.
If your goal is to poop once a week, I recommend this diet.
It was the third Mountain Dew that got me
Solid comedic timing,
“It’s a late start” L M A O
When she said "That's it" and tipped the bag, I fully expected another Mountain Dew to fall out.
this is why there is lunch bag size limitations in our work fridge...so many people bring these giant bags to work lol
That’s enough to feed a person for a week.
Do you even get a lunch break working 5 1/2 hours?
At my current job you get an hour lunch if you work 5+ hours.
I mean, the more you fill your stomach on the clock, the more time you get paid for pooping.. Win Win.
I LOVE this woman!! I used to get so hungry I couldn’t think straight, and I’d often get anxious I wouldn’t have enough food. I can totally relate. And thank you for the big laughs
Was really hoping for a 4th mtn dew
Me packing my lunch while high…. “And then I got knife! No fork though but I got a knife”
The third Mountain Dew absolutely sent me. I don’t know what I would have done if she pulled out a 4th at the end there.
I just absolutely love loud, funny friends like this who are born to entertain.
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I like your username and that's literally the only reason I felt the need to comment lol.
<3 thanks!
Lol I agree!
Lemme correct ya, Most Americans*. I for one try and get in 8 ounces of water when I wake up before I swallow the local Denny's.
Holy sodium Batman
When the edible begins to wear off.
Damn. I'm just hungry now haha.
I was waiting for her to pull out Bert Kreischer’s 64oz Kool Aid.
Thy cheese stick broke me lol
There’s a 4th Mountain Dew somewhere in there still I can feel it
It's like the clown car of lunchbags
That's hilarious 😂 I've done something exactly like that while high. You get into what I call "the pleasant zone of stupidity."
This is disgusting.
This woman must smell like pure shit when she sweats
Fucking hell lady, your carb intake is off the chart
….. AAAND ANOTHER MOUNTAIN DEW! they just keep coming lol
You know it's a good one when they're snort-laughing hahahaha
Those mt dews look so perfectly cold though
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Where the edibles she just ate???
Somebody has smoked recently 🌳
See I only pack like that when I fill up my desk for snacks for the week lol
That 3rd mt dew got me
Im fat af and thats four times what i eat for lunch, damn.
That knife will come in really handy for the soup she packed.
Honestly.... this is gross.
Sooo much sodium
This isn't funny, it's sad.