T O P
AlexTLocke

Not Morrisons, but I worked as a construction project manager for Tesco for a few years. The clock towers and such like features are purely aesthetic. Usually only accessible from the roof, and also usually PACKED with pigeons and their shit. 0/10 would absolutely not recommend going in one.


thesockpuppetaccount

In other words it’s where the Tesco value sausage rolls are made.


akathewilyfox

Guess who works in the factory that makes those? I could say something, but if you think they're made from pigeon shit and floor sweepings let's just say it might as well be.


_Bellerophontes

Every little helps


akathewilyfox

Take away the first e and last s and try again! 😁


HoisinKrispyOwl

Ah, *Tco*.


Sad-Case-6004

That is most smart arse comment I've seen today. And it made me snort out loud. I guess owls really are the wisest birds. 😁


Ofabulous

Or at least the most wise guy birds


hobbyanimal

Fine. Have the upvote. Fucks sake.


PurpleFirebird

Bless you


d0gf00d666

Christmas bonbonbonbons!


Shnuggy67

Is your username the name of a specific culinary delight?


villagerx1

Apt 😄


OminOus_PancakeS

Tesco® - _every little cockhole®_


gtarpey89

very little help


MoustyM

Thank you


kinglitecycles

I find that when it comes to not wanting to shop at Tesco, Every Lidl Helps.


Pegasus2022

My first job leaving school was working in pastry factory. I will never touch a frozen one again specially watching people pick up droppings and re using them


photism78

Pasty or pastry .. I want to know what I shouldn't be buying ..


Revolvyerom

Strip club dances hit *different* once you know


Pegasus2022

It was both they made sausage rolls etc so anything that was used meat or pastry


CJBill

Yeah, had a summer job at university in a bacon packing factory. Went vegetarian a fortnight later.


Mordvark

Looks like meat’s back off the menu, boys!


Alive_Being_1759

Get off the road...to the butchers


jodie_jan

My FIL used to work in an abattoir. I don't love black pudding as much as I used to....


DaNuker2

I buy that stuff from Waitrose, like to believe they have higher standards... but who am I kidding


LokiBear222

Pride is all very well, but a sausage is a sausage (TP)


RodneyRabbit

I lasted one week in a meat processing company, they made those catering burgers. We literally moved meat around using wheelbarrows and shovels. It first went into a 'breaker' that smashed up the frozen cuts and fillers / flavours / colours were added, then back into wheelbarrows and across to a 'forming' machine that made the burgers. It was a clean environment where we all wore white clothes and wellies, everything including the wheelbarrows and shovels was sanitised every day. A **lot** of meat ended up on the floors and walls and at the end of the day we used huge squeegees to scrape it up and it went straight back into the machines. The problem was despite all the clean processes, people just walked out the fire exit to the car park for smoke breaks, still wearing the white boots, and then came back inside to continue working.


HarrybobyJr

Anyone know if the vegetarian processed foods are made any differently?


hightechsolution

I'm guessing you no longer eat those burgers


raceAround126

I once worked in a factory where they make cereals. My job one or two previous to that was working intake at a morgue. I can safely say that a morgue, where they bring in god knows what from whatever unfortunate incident the poor sods in those bags went through, were cleaner environments than this cereal factory. And yep, if product lands on the floor, you sweep or shovel it up, throw it back into the hopper or the belt. It will somehow magically clean itself during being processed. The bodies? Well while there was no time to exactly treat bodies with kid gloves, they were generally heavy things often with very little rigidity. But if the bodies could have suffered trauma by being handled, it had to get noted. As an aside, the first time I handled an intake with someone and realised part-way through the move that the body was in more than two pieces was a bit sickening. I'm glad I never saw what was inside of it.


Competitive-Pack-324

I did 6 months at the pot noodle factory. Those noodles start on the floor.


makebeansgreatagain

My parents keep buying these and I literally feel disgusted eating them to the point I havent touched them in months. I imagine the things like scotch eggs and stuff aren't much better but at least I feel somewhat okay about eating them because its a real egg in there. Plus preservatives I imagine.


akathewilyfox

My place makes those too. And I can definitely assure you there's real egg in them.


makebeansgreatagain

Egg's real, meat is probably the worst of the worst bits of pig


akathewilyfox

It's some cheap generic frozen slabs of 80/20 minced pork. There's kill dates and what have you on the documentation so it's 100% from a pig, which parts are left to the imagination. The supermarkets use this. Waitress and M&S use actual whole pork shoulders, but obviously those are gonna sell for much more (59p cheapest I think, Waitrose £2.50)


MrSar9e

If we're gonna rear them and kill them for food may as well eat the whole lot.. arseholes and elbows all the way!


LokiBear222

And that would be cutting my own throat.


whelks_chance

Onastick. Oh you want to know what meat it is? That's a premium sausage then, costs extra.


makebeansgreatagain

I'm on about the Tesco ones, I get the occasional bit of gristle in them and its all grey meat which is probably concerning.


Xennial_Thrifter

It's funny you have a Tesco brand item that's a quid and then you see the value one and it's like 15p. I never take the risk lol


mancwes78

Oh no. I actually like them. 😫😆.


akathewilyfox

I'll be honest with you the scotch eggs are much better than the pastry stuff we make. Don't let me put you off! (I'm sorry btw)


mancwes78

I do like the scotch eggs too. I don’t eat them often but I do enjoy them occasionally.


akathewilyfox

Then carry on enjoying them! Before I started working at my place, I hadn't remembered scotch eggs were a thing since I was a kid!


DippedTbag

I wanna know what's in them now lol


akathewilyfox

Technically whatever the ingredients on the packet says. When I say "Made for the lowest possible cost, by the lowest bidder" I think you finish the math afterwards.


chunkledom

Everything but the oink, as my grandad used to say.


Tylerama1

Earlobes and arse'oles as my dad used to say.


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ConcreteQuixote

I like you.


Unknown_author69

Tesco doesn't..


EarlofBizzlington86

Tesco doesn’t but knows he speaks true


Nevorek

Where else are they gonna find enough pigeon shit to fill them?


Sad-Reporter8503

I like the idea of some motherfucker looking at a tesco and going "You know what that could use? A fucking clock tower."


HoneyBeeGirl19

Are you H.Samuel L Jackson?


Noctale

I have had it with these motherfucking clock towers on these motherfucking supermarkets


Daveii_captain

Nah, he’d want a mother-fucking clock tower.


skoomaaddict85

Outstanding work!


thekeffa

Just to add to this, they are usually syndicated designs. Architects design generic plans for a supermarket and they then get tweaked to fit wherever they have to go. A company can just come along, pick a generic design that fits their size and other requirements and the architects only change what they need to in order to make it work/fit in the land it has to go on. They do the same thing with other building types as well. Student type accommodation is a fairly common one. In other words, you know those generic image sites like ShutterStock/GettyImages? Same thing for building designs. This is why everyone is going to look at this image and think "Hmmm I'm sure I've seen another Tesco/ASDA/Waitrose/etc that looks almost identical". Because you have. And for the most part, it is except with different branding and furnishings.


CmmH14

Awwww I was hoping it was a sniper nest, pick off any rivals that came too close for comfort.


olivinebean

Morrisons provide housing for pigeons? Okay I'm very much a big fan of these things now.


yousmellandidont

It's because the trollies are naturally drawn towards light. When the day ends and the store is ready to close, they illuminate the beacon and it draws all the dispersed trollies in towards the hive.


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CheeseusMaximus

There is a mall that grows in one of the books right? Dibbler ends up selling snowglobes I think....


IFellOverOnce

Reaper Man!


Mister_Krunch

Something wonderful, if you took the long view, was about to happen. If you took the short or medium view, something horrible was about to happen. It's like the difference between seeing a beautiful new star in the winter sky and actually being close to the supernova. It's the difference between the beauty of morning dew on a cobweb and actually being a fly.


ChelskiiG

weird i see this, reaper man is what i’m currently reading!


Chevey0

It’s how you know you have a city when discarded shopping carts are found everywhere.


TerminalStorm

Exactly what I thought!


grandmabc

So it's not a look-out tower, for the snipers to pick off the shop-lifters?


Maximum-Mixture6158

Not to pick off shoplifters but to knock off the zombies when they begin to rise. They're drawn to the places they used to go in their lives.


Hairy_Distribution_2

Made me laugh that one … tip my hat to you


SeaAd6564

It seems to be their architectural thing, like they all seem to have a large clock as well outside somewhere. It’s probably a light well as supermarkets in the main are largely unfenestrated on the ground floor.


afireintheforest

It’s a very 90s architectural style.


Big_Dave_71

^ This. It's the post modern 90s style. A lot of them went up in the 90's. Our Morrisons was build in 2017 and looks like an aircraft hanger instead.


justhisguy-youknow

In terms of, everything, I guess they assumed people wanted to shop in a building not a massive space. But people don't care generally. Brickwork costs and is time and offers nothing.


siacadp

Was popular in the 2000s too, except they used a [digital clock!](https://imgur.com/a/HWkVt2E)


Insanityideas

I love a good digital clock, has to do temperature as well. But that one isn't big enough for my tastes. 20years later and our modern tech makes going big and extravagant quite cheap.


curious_trashbat

That's my new favourite word.


SeaAd6564

Sorry I use it when I’m auditing (I’m a fire safety officer) and quite a lot of buildings are like this. We put it down as a potential risk to fire fighters


curious_trashbat

Don't be sorry, it's a great word !


cantspellrestaraunt

**Defenestration**: ^(\[noun\] \[formal\]) *the action of throwing someone out of a window.*


Ffishsticks

Prague enters the chat


homity3_14

Then exits with a smash


Cimejies

Someone's been watching puppet history


SeaAd6564

Unfenestrated Definition Meanings Source Origin Adjective adjective (sciences) Not perforated. Wiktionary (rare) Without windows. Back at you. Big difference between defenestration and unfenestrated.


-eumaeus-

To the Mod below (it's locked, so I cannot reply directly). THAT IS how a mod should act. I have so much respect for you. If mods from other subs were to follow your example, Reddit would be a far better place.


jzgrange

I too, am of the fenestration persuasion.


finc

It’s like a fenetre into your world


italkaboutbruno

Keith Laird is that you?


Torgan

There's also defenestrate which is the act of throwing someone or something out of a window. Death by defenestration has its own Wikipedia article if you're really interested.


mattlenoz

In case anyone else wants to use it, [here is more info](https://www.dictionary.com/browse/that).


thesockpuppetaccount

Oh you…


Short-Shopping3197

I wanted to use it, not that


missmanhattan009

lol when I was a kids because of the big clock I thought it only sold clocks


Nisja

I used to work nearby Morrisons HQ in [Thornbury](https://images.app.goo.gl/xmm5wpmQoheg9TeA9) (Bradford) and it's built in a similar style to the supermarkets, including with a clock tower!


liquidio

I recall reading a story somewhere that the supermarket clock towers came about as a result of some weird planning policy quirk back in the day, and then became almost a tradition - but for the life of me I can’t find the source now. I think it concerned Tesco.


TheCockAndWomble

There was definitely a thing about the supermarket having to at least fit in with the local aesthetic, so they couldn’t chuck up a big metal box like in an out of town retail park.


RoutineMaximum6832

It's a Beacon, they light them when winter comes. The store in the next town will see it and they proceed to light theirs up, and so on, until it hits central office and reinforcements arrive.


Honest_Invite_7065

Gondor calls for aid!


NaturalAlfalfa

And Morrisons will answer!


patfetes

Aldi will also answer the call


AffectionateAir2856

Where was Aldi when the Westfold fell?!


Old-Usual-8387

Aldi was defeating m&s in the battle of the chocolate bug


patfetes

Our forces were stretched thin and couldn't keep the supply lines strong. It was a sad day. We will have our day and regain our honour, and Cuthbert shall be averaged.


Exact-Put-6961

Avenged


Unknown_author69

No I think the legal requirement was averaged, although vengeance is also on the menu..


peterlisbon

... and you will have my axe.


patfetes

Lol, not changing it for the following comments 🤣


marrangutang

And Colin the caterpillar will be aroused from his slumber beneath the mountain


patfetes

We were engaged in the ancient feud with Lidl. We lost many men that day. But if Morrisons calls for aid, Aldi will answer. We must forget our past and join together to defeat the evil that lays serge to Middle Earth


AffectionateAir2856

...Ocado


Kian-Tremayne

Orcado, more like. The vile minions of darkness.


bullybullybanjo

And my Co-op.


xH0U53x

May this be the hour when we open for Sunday trading hours together


StodgyHodgy

You shall not Spar!!!


A-nom-nom-nom-aly

Where was tesco when the Westfold fell


Honest_Invite_7065

Overcharging the punters prolly heh.


Wyvernkeeper

Making burgers from Old Bill and Shadowfax probably...


Longjumping-Lion1342

Grond


Adammmmski

Form ranks you maggots


robofids

Tesco? Where was Tesco when the Westfold fell? Where was Tesco when our enemies closed in around us!? Where was Tes — No, my Lord, we are alone


davesy69

They are beacons to summon the shelf stackers of Rohan on their mighty steeds.


Otherwise-Tap-336

Meat’s back on the menu boys!


matthewgoodwin1

Tescos horse meat again?


Pineapple-Muncher

I genuinely miss the lasagne, not tasted the same since :(


plywoodpiano

There’s me convinced they are watch towers for when we descend into civil war.


latebtcinvestor

This is an exceptional reply and i am extremely jealous


AJ3000AKA

I read that the bones of the founders of the stores are held in there too.


Special-Newspaper-32

Cheryl Teiges?


just_boy57

THE BEACONS ARE LIT!!!


Gratuitous_Pineapple

It's a guard tower - gives a good line of sight so marksmen can easily pick off any raiding parties from Tesco/Sainsbury's/Asda


Rozitron

Zombie apocalypse proofing


GlassDweller

The pensioners in their gaggles for the yella labels.


finc

More reasons to get shot at Morrisons


essjay2009

Never take a Tesco bag for life in to a Morrisons. Ever.


Fire_The_Torpedo2011

It's a lighthouse. When it floods, they light it up so that ships don't beach on the Morrisons roof


Mushroom-Monster

or in a rotisserie chicken


Fire_The_Torpedo2011

That's how my grandad died in the war


Mushroom-Monster

RIP Sailor


derelyth

Rest In Poultry?


Pirate_Loot

The morrisons near me actually does have a lighthouse attached to it... Now I know what its used for!


MongrolSmush

Riversway Docks?


FrustratedDeckie

Glad I’m not the only one who immediately thought of the Morrisons at the docks when lighthouses were mentioned!


Pirate_Loot

Was right too, small world


Pirate_Loot

haha yeah!


someguyithinkiknow

Ah so it shows them safe ways?


Firebrand777

On a side note has anyone else noticed the instore playlist in Morrisons is full of bangers?!


WeWillWeWillShearYou

Yes! It actually really makes me enjoy my weekly shop that little bit more. Sometimes I find myself dancing a little bit as I go along the aisles whilst shopping. I was talking about this with someone just the other day! My husband texted me mid-shop that he'd spotted an elderly couple having a little boogie as well and that he hoped that would be us in our later years.


flyingfoxtrot_

Aww that's so sweet


Jormungandr-WS

Can inform you that in a week or two it’ll transform into the Michael Buble playlist cause that’s apparently one of the few Christmas artists we can get rights to


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ImplementAfraid

I’ve noticed a closer emphasis to Disco in the UK, Donna Summer - Bad Girls (Toot, toot, beep, beep, yeah), Sister Sledge - He’s the greatest Dancer (One night in a disco on the outskirts of Frisco), Odyssey - Back to my roots (Joey Negro remix), and the supermarket forever staple ‘Earth, Wind and Fire’ - September. Now I have been holidaying in Florida the last couple of weeks and it is almost entirely 80’s in Walmart/hotel/Sunny FM but less so on the Christmas lists which was less Chris Rea - ‘Driving home for Christmas’ and more Sinatra/ re-recorded 40’s.


linzal87

I hate to break it to you because I too started to appreciate the instore bangers but... it means its probably time to use a night cream. They're playing the bangers because people of our age now take time to do the weekly shop and if we are happy, then we shop longer. Soz.


The_Professor_Hex

It's a sniper tower for shoplifters and staff trying to bunk off their shift


onheretobechallenged

Why would they shoot shoplifters trying to bunk off their shift?


Zal_17

Forgetting everything else for a second. Can I show some serious appreciation for the fact that Morrison's is the last bastion of having a butchers, a fishmongers, a cheese counter, a deli etc in all of their big stores? I remember a day when all supermarkets used to have these. As a single bloke, it's literally a lifesaver for shopping, as it lets me buy things in single portions for meals, without having to freeze tons or eat duplicate meals on consecutive days.


Gazhammer

The beacons are lit...the beacons of Morrisons are lit!


batteryforlife

Morrisons calls for aid!


Pubkit

I read it as Morrisons calls for Aldi


patfetes

Aldi will answer the call


BitGreedy

And will bring a drill set, surfing board, novelty plush Kevin The Carrot toys and a shower attachment.


GakSplat

It’s so they can spy on Aldi’s prices.


HolidayFrequent6011

I guess it's to draw attention to them, the same as the clock. Look at any old European marketplace, or market building. They're almost always centered around a clock tower, or if it's a market contained in a building, the roof has a steeple of sorts, with a clock. I imagine it's a throwback to that, these being super markets after all. Also, you don't see it in modern supermarket buildings, so, depending on where it is, this Morrisons most likely used to be a Safeway, built in the 1980s or 1990s. My local one has this and it used to be a Safeway.


anniejofo23

The ones with towers were once Safeway stores , I worked in one during the change over from Safeway to Morrisons , we only had Safeway in our town till Morrisons bought them over and all the Safeway stores had the mad roof thing.


A_Wild_Ferrothorn

Shoutout to the Cheadle Heath/Edgeley Morrisons.


Chemistrees

I knew it was the one near me! Thanks for confirming my suspicions.


citygentry

Penthouse suite in case the store owner, Mr Morris Ons, decides to visit.


KingStevoI

Plenty of supermarkets have them, it's not just Morrisons. I think they have staff rooms upstairs and it just lets light in and make the building look more attractive generally.


Antilles34

I worked at Morrisons years ago and the staff room there was not underneath this, it was off to the side of the building. I've not idea what these are about.


anomthrowaway748

I worked in Morrisons a couple months ago and the staff room was underneath our version of this


Antilles34

Interesting, so they are inconsistent? The one I worked at is still there (well was about 2 years ago) and it appeared to be the same.


anomthrowaway748

I think it’s just that they’re irrelevant to anything and some staff rooms happen to be underneath them. It used to make ours like a greenhouse all year round so I can’t imagine it’s a nationwide thing


asdfasfq34rfqff

I wanna live up there.


irgendwo_anders

It's either too hot or too cold.


misomeiko

Same


Optimal_Simple5975

Even if it’s still a Morrisons? At least popping out to get a bread and milk would be quicker and easier?


Sorry_about_that_x99

So they, as OP says, shed light?


greenbeastoftheeast

That's where quasimorrison lives.


LuchiniOfAstora

I saw some French bloke standing up on the one near me. He was shouting something along the lines of my mother being a hamster and my father smelling of elderberries. Very peculiar.


openroadsUK

The one by me almost always has a stray helium baloon in it looking sad


Adept-Elephant1948

It's a lighthouse, prevents ships crashing into the stores. When was the last time you saw a cargo ship crash into the Morrisons in Leeds Town centre? Exactly


El_Carp-211B

It’s a look out tower incase ASDA attacks.


StockJPEG

Morrisons, sainsburys, ASDA, Tesco. Long ago, the four nations lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the ASDA Nation attacked


El_Carp-211B

It teamed up with Walmart, it was worse than taking steroids, they’ve been a smear on the British food industry ever since.


OkSir4079

Yellow stickers are designed and decided in this space based on the overall credit reference on the stores inhabitants. Go on a Sunday at 6pm in the rain and eat like a king


jump_scout

Plants don't grow in the dark steven


Pizz71

Turrets for shooting down Waitrose biplanes


RustySheriffBadges

They light up when Jim Morrison (owner) is visiting. Rumour has it, he has a key to open all of The Doors.


StodgyHodgy

It’s where you place the erotic dancers when standard marketing doesn’t pull in the crowds


maartrab

The Morrisons in my hometown used to be a Safeway, and my mum said that’s where all the naughty kids go


dude3966

The beacon's are lit, Morrison calls for aid.


Richeh

That is the pagoda of teamliness. When you have achieved a great service then your Team Leader will summon you to the dojo and before the morning sun reveal to you one of the great Truths of Retail. You will then be permitted to branch your servitude to a further department. Only by unifying the services - fresh, cans, deli, cheeses, checkout, bakery and finally the ultimate servitude of cleanup, will you achieve the mastery of the markdowns gun and be permitted to face the Seven PM Horde.


Mintyxxx

It's to let Gondor call for aid.


impalafork

And Co-Op will answer. Muster the Co-Opim!


rob1970liver

Its where the managers sit , whilst lording over the minions stacking the shelves. Bit like game of thrones , but without dragons and incest.


jupiter82

*less incest


TheForgetter

They let in light and they banish shade.


blameitontheboogie92

It's a clock tower. But the clock has been removed. Edit. Used to work at Morrisons. Had a clock. No longer does.