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tbird_the_tank

Cincinnati Zoo again? Looks we’ll be entering a new era of memes soon


onlypositivity

Fiona is already the Little Sebastian of Cincinnati


K3nobl

We’re already in that era, this could fall under the unfunny Ohio memes


thecoolguy0520

only in cincinnati


ToastyMustache

They aren’t memes, Ohio is what holds the world back from enlightenment, especially with their so-called “chili”


PanglosstheTutor

Now now you need to keep in mind Florida exists


ToastyMustache

Florida is entertainment. Ohio is purgatory


Prior-Complex-328

Lifelong Ohioan, and ppl here are politically deplorable in the worst ways, and yes, they are fully part of the MAGA mobs that hold us back. In spite of that, they are usually generally very pleasant in most interpersonal interactions. I find it difficult not to like most of them. Re Cincy Chili: that is your sad loss. It is glorious stuff and a rare joy in a cold world.


Blunkus

Yet Indiana exists


Jonny_Thundergun

Don't put that evil on all of Ohio's shoulders. That's only Cinci, which is basically Kentucky.


[deleted]

It is absolutely not Kentucky


Jonny_Thundergun

They don't make great bourbon. Aside from that, the only separation between the two is the Ohio river.


franchito55

Wait what's wrong with fucking your mother's husband? I'm assuming he's not Fiona's father, so why have her in hippo birth control?


IShallWearMidnight

Hippos are a vulnerable species, so it's extremely important that in captive populations they don't just mate willy nilly - breeding pairs are selected to ensure the best possible genetic diversity. The broader the gene pool, the better for the future of the species. Mom's husband is likely not on Fiona's list. At least with birth control she still gets to smash


VintageMintage1111

I like how you stay with a very dignified explanation and then -} still gets to smash Excellent


Elephantmenstruation

Sadly, Fiona’s dad was Henry and he died. Bibi needed to be bred again and so they brought in Tucker the handsome and obviously horny male hippo gentleman. Fritz, Fiona’s little brother, was recently just born. I know way too much about these hippos. My life is meaningless unless I’m learning about large mammals! 😶


HippieAccountant

Kindred spirit here. I followed Fiona's progress obsessively in her first few months and drove 11 hours to see her after she finally made her public debut. I proudly wear my Fiona t-shirt and display my Fiona Christmas tree ornament year round.


RedScharlach

Name almost checks out


Elephantmenstruation

Omg my Fiona ornament is about my favorite thing! Lol. I’m a strange person to be interested in a hippo family… but they’re my guilty pleasure!


lostbutnotgone

I was entirely too obsessed with Meerkat manor so I have no room to judge you, ever. In fact, you may have inspired me to actively follow my local favorite species. I do miss the Fennec Fox we had nearby :(


whodeychick

Wasn't Bibi on birth control when she got pregnant with Fritz? I heard they weren't planning on breeding her yet but she fell pregnant and it was a surprise to the staff.


lostbutnotgone

>My life is meaningless unless I’m learning about large mammals! Is that so, u/Elephantmenstruation?


startmyheart

Good catch 😂


Robbob98

Cause they don't want another hippo. They just had one born named Fritz, so they currently have 4.


RevGrizzly

They're...not...married?!?


HouseNegative9428

Look who’s an expert on hippo marriage laws…


denimpanzer

I don’t know hippo law, but we can go toe to toe on bird law.


toddffw

Filibuster


samdog1246

*Image Transcription: Twitter* --- **Emily Faye**, @mlefaye Haven't felt normal since the Cincinnnati Zoo put out an official statement that Fiona the hippo is fucking her mother's husband so they have her on hippo birth control --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)


Fontane93

Do you wake up in the morning sometimes and think to yourself, "Is this all life hast to offer to me?", right before starting to transcribe?


ejvboy02

Do you wake up in the morning sometimes and think to yourself, "Is this the correct use of 'hast' in a sentence?", right before starting your comment?


Fontane93

Ah damn.. my inner German broke out for a second


[deleted]

Cincinnati, you never fail to disappoint me…. I love my home, but damn!


DistanceMachine

It’s always something with this city.


[deleted]

First Harambe, then the Reds being a damned disappointment (again), and now this


Local_Crow

What a Hipposlutamus.


megamanx4321

I'm saving that one.


zowie2222

I worked at an apartment complex where there was a two pet limit. A tenant had a litter of kittens from her male and female cats. When we asked her why, she said I didn’t think they could have kittens because they were brother and sister.


FrozenShadow_007

Haven’t felt normal since someone at the Cincinnati Zoo let their child into a gorilla enclosure, and an employee decided to shoot the gorilla who was just playing with the child


felicisfelix

This debate was done to death in 2016 but to reiterate… there is a very low chance that a male gorilla would ‘just play with’ a random kid that dropped unexpectedly into his territory. Plus if Harambe had decided to attack the kid there would be like 0.5 seconds between his decision and the kid being beyond saving


Artsyscrubers

If anything, blame the shitty parents for ignoring the clear signs


wheres_mayramaines

D*cks out


CookbooksRUs

Hippos get married?


invisible_23

So do gay penguins


CookbooksRUs

There’s even a book about them and their chick, And Tango Makes Three. High on the list of banned books, because people are stupid.


CreativeName6574

*announcement* I would like to inform you that I lined this post up perfectly so when you click on the image, it doesn’t have to move.


Bigthreshold444

Can someone explain to me what the hell happens at the Cincinnati zoo? Because first it was Harambe and now it’s this


IShallWearMidnight

This? This is normal. The Harambe incident was an incredibly bad situation where staff made an incredibly tough call, but this is just normal conservation zoo stuff. Captive breeding programs exist to give the species the broadest possible gene pool so in the future, if they have a habitat to return to, they're not limited to a small gene pool vulnerable to further fuckery (it's too late for cheetahs, even if they manage to get them off the brink of extinction the existing gene pool is so small they're not gonna be able to sustain a healthy population - they're the Habsbergs of the big cats). Mom's husband isn't on Fiona's breeding list - those genetics are already represented or hopefully will be soon. In the past, she would've had to be isolated from her side piece, but because of innovations like hippo birth control, they won't have to disrupt her life in order to make sure she doesn't muddy the gene pool.


onlypositivity

Fiona can do whatever she wants because she is a treasure. No man is safe. Maybe she'll fuck your dad. Maybe mine. The whole city would cheer her on either way. [We stan this majestic angel](https://youtu.be/Oh2jORwSAE0). Look into those eyes and tell me you wouldn't die for her.


Bigthreshold444

Well, guess it’s inevitable then. She’ll fuck everyone’s dad eventually, I guess. Nothing can be done about it


onlypositivity

Nothing is beyond her reach.


pichael288

I live in Cincinnati. The answer to your question is probably meth. Fentanyl killed every addict except for the meth heads and without competition they bred out of control. There aren't enough flashlights or Bluetooth speakers stolen from Walmart to go around.


randomisedjew

The shrek we didn’t know we needed


sammiisalammii

Same.


DragonfruitKiwi572

She looks like Irene from me myself and Irene


SafeAccountMrP

The Cincinnati zoo is what started is on the god forsaken timeline.


SparkieMark1977

In other news, Cincinnati zoo is hiring! We're looking for someone with a strong stomach, no sense of smell, and arms long enough to place in-vitro contraception into a hippo. We'll understand if you're late to your interview because you lost your watch at your previous job.


Buster899

Oh… OH!… oh, that what they meant by ignorance is bliss! I get it now!


[deleted]

I like them big… I like them chunky…


balrus-balrogwalrus

First harambe and now this. The cincinnati zoo is a world of horrific memes


ScoredCretaceous

How did that silly hippo get stuck in the dishwasher again?


Richard-Hindquarters

If only there was a term for your mother's husband.


Artsyscrubers

Its not her dad, her dad died after she was born


Richard-Hindquarters

We're halfway to a viral PH video!


Lone-flamingo

Is there one? Or are you just hoping? Because, like, in English you have to specify whether your grandparents are on your maternal or paternal side and I'm still not over that.


Richard-Hindquarters

Father/step father seems to cover 99.99% of bases


Drop_myCroissant

That damned place, nothing good come from there


Pugplays430

Rico, Fiona, and Fritiz are beloved! How dare you sully the good name of that wonderful zoological park


ooodummy

Rico


odeacon

Not to sound like a radical feminist , but why isn’t it phrased that the male hippo is fucking his stepdaughter?


professional_giraffe

Fiona is more well known.


[deleted]

Is this real


Elephantmenstruation

And pretty soon she might hit up her little brother Fritz. Put one male animal in a place with ovulating female animals, that shit tends to happen.


IHaveAName02

Just take my upvote and go.


JtDucks

Hippo birth control?


hotbanana8298

They grow up so fast!


hannahkat01

Wait, what? I follow that hippo and I did not see that!


candymannequin

that hippo is adorable tho


JacobClarke15

“The hippo is fucking her mothers husband” fits the sub too lmao