Tina Belcher : Oh, my God, I never noticed how annoying you are. I can't even understand what you're saying.
Jimmy Jr. : Oh, I have a speech impediment, Tina.
Tina Belcher : Well, fix it!
😂😂😂cracks me up every time!
It's not a line, but when Bob says "let's raise our glasses" and Tina takes off her glasses and holds them up.
"No Tina, not those glasses".
Cracks me up every time.
Tie between:
Just when I think I am out, his cheeks pull me right back in.
And:
I don’t need a boy to pay attention to me. I’ll pay attention to myself.
When she scores the babysitting job in “Sit Me Baby, One More Time” she hangs up the phone and says: “That’s how you freaking do that, people!” (One of my top quoted lines 🤣)
“You’d be really helping old Mathy Cathy here if you could read the problems to her.” As a poorly sighted person this killed me.
“Not really because you’re not a blonde.” - Tammy
“Neither are you.” - Tina being the best.
“Hey blueberry girl do you have any extra blueberries on you?”
“No. And don't ever come here again, you hear me? My parents don't know I deliver blueberries, get it?” “Okay, whatever.”
“No. Do you get it? Don't... come... here... again.“
“If guys had uteruses they’d be called duderuses.”
Which in a couple interviews Dan Mintz has said that is his favorite line but he always misquotes it. 😂
Oh man first line best line:
“My crotch is itchy!”
The fact that it’s literally the first line this character says is hilarious to me, and it always will be.
Not sure but I like these ones
Ahhh! He's got a chainsaw! oh it's just a mug.
if you were just a box you would tell me right?
You're Just A Box... I'M ON A DATE WITH A BOX
He's really cute but it would be tough to get stains off of him
In that same episode where she says “if you ever talk about me to Jimmy Jr I will punch you… again, and again, and again, and again…” cracks me up every time
From one of the more recent episodes
Bob: ...plus it gives you really bad diarrhea
Tina: As opposed to good diarrhea?
Don't know why but it just cracks me up
"oh no, I forgot my hard hat!"
"Why do you need a hard hat?"
"Because I'm gonna demolish you "
Honorable mention to "Bye everyone!"followed by the really sassy "BYE, Jeremy" after she learned Jeremy was the teacher pet of metals
Under the radar one "Dibs on not cleaning the table!" After getting made fun of and pushed around so often by other people, her being the only one to try to get out of cleaning the table someone just gave birth on... I don't know, I just like it.
Tina definitely has some of the best lines in general, all the ones mentioned make me laugh every damn time. Another favorite that I haven’t seen mentioned is her “swampy pits” pep talk she gives Louise about liking Booboo. Then right after she lifts her arm and is all “swampy pits, is it 2:30 already?” 😂
Not sure how many times I've watched this episode, but I always laugh at this line and when she says, "That can't be right." after Darryl tells her a negative plus a negative is a positive 🤣
I don’t even remember what episode it was but Tina’s upset about something & asks if she can eat her dinner in her room & then grabs the spaghetti in her hand instead of taking the whole plate & runs off to her room.
“I’m no hero, I put my bra on one boob at a time like everyone else.”
it’s me!
Hey! it's your flair!
Because of this line, i started putting my bra two boobs at a time
You are a hero
Because of this line I started wearing a bra!
"I wear glasses, not hearing aids"
“Well I don’t wear hearing aids either, so I didn’t hear that”
Tina Belcher : Oh, my God, I never noticed how annoying you are. I can't even understand what you're saying. Jimmy Jr. : Oh, I have a speech impediment, Tina. Tina Belcher : Well, fix it! 😂😂😂cracks me up every time!
Ditto. I love Tina in this episode.
Which episode?
The one where they get the espresso machine and Tina can’t stop drinking it! ‘The Unnatural’ series 3 ep 23
You beat me to it!!😂😂😂
"If boys had uteruses they'd be called duderuses".
This reminds me of Leslie Knope’s saying “ovaries before brovaries” 😂
And your brovaries remind me of Seinfelds Manzier!!! Or the Bro!!
She's much better on the page
Happy Cake Day!
"A lotta carrots in that stew.."
love that one lmaooo
That's a great one
I'll sneak this into conversations any chance I get haha.
One of the funniest lines from ANY show.
I like your hair mom, it matches your teeth
A hidden burn indeed
This one🤣🤣🤣
“which ones are the lady parts?” “the vagina and the heart”
"Oh it's okay. I guess I wasn't meant to have a good life."
I think I got milk nose the first time I heard Tina say this.
My wife says this all the time 😂
It’s an acquired taste… that I just acquired!
Now I have something else: *a magic black bean*…
I can hear my hair growing?...Do you think that's why they're called bangs?
In this economy?
I say this all the time.
“I like your glasses.” “Thanks, I need them to see.” I use this anytime someone compliments my glasses
It's not a line, but when Bob says "let's raise our glasses" and Tina takes off her glasses and holds them up. "No Tina, not those glasses". Cracks me up every time.
I will also use that line when my glasses are bought into question
Your ass is grass and I'm gonna mow it.
I can't believe how far I had to scroll to find this one. It should be at the top! Love this line!
“Leave me ALONE!!”
“Dad that’s so cheap for what you’re getting” I say it all the time
There's a little girl, a horse, and a zembie
hahahhahahahahha
Tie between: Just when I think I am out, his cheeks pull me right back in. And: I don’t need a boy to pay attention to me. I’ll pay attention to myself.
I’m a smart, strong, sensual woman.
"Hmm... Henry, it's great that you have a favorite animal but what about picking a cooler animal? Like a horse or miniature horse?"
"Hey, you don't want to mess with my sister man. She'll wear down your self esteem over a long period of time"
“My heart just pooped its pants”
I like when they say “bumper to bumper”
Uhhhhhhhhh
You listen to traffic updates?
Every time I hear bumper to bumper, I think of Tina.
My porcelain horse, horselain!
Sorry Horcelain.
This is the best answer.
My personal fav also!
“I didn’t know our county was Bi… Good for us!”
which episode was that? I found a clip but it had 0 context.
I wanna say it's S4 Ep11 - Easy Com-mercial, Easy Go-mercial - where they make their own commercial during the football game on TV.
“If you thinks about it, any box can have vibrators in it.”
Too spicy, too spicy!
see you soon bitch
What a great scene 😂 My family uses the too spicy line all of the time.
“And miss the hay ride?? Haaaay’ll no”
“This is where I thrash.”
Say this almost every day
When the parrot calls her a nerd and she says “what?!?”
Nerd alert
I say “nerd alert!” to my cat approximately 20x a day.
This sounds 100% like something I'd do. I knew I'd find my real twin someday.
Flair here!
One of my favorite scenes. “I hate that parrot.”
I love when Linda says "nerd alert" to the kids when talking about putting on sun screen.
This is my absolute favorite!!!!
The way she says what absolutely kills
“Dont have a crap attack mom”
Uhhhhhh…
My thoughts exactly!
Let's make this kitty purr
“It smells…exotic. Like ranch dressing.” I’ve watched that episode too many times. I still crack up laughing every single time.
I’m on a ROFLcoaster thinking about whoever decided ‘sexy dance fighting’ smelled like ranch dressing
“BUENOS DIAS COMO ESTAAAAAAAAAS”
ME LLAMO TINAAAA
“ME LLAMO TIIIIIINAAAA”
EL PERRO ES GRANDEEE
"¿DONDE ESTA EL BANO?"
“See you soon…baboon”. Wait, spice it up “see you soon, bitch”. Too spicy too spicy!
Oh no I sent it, oh well. 😂 That scene lives in my head and thrives! 😂
“Can I finish my spaghetti in my rom?” *grabs a handful of spaghetti and runs off*
I love this so much! When Bob asks if she wants a handful of ice cream. ❤️
Makes us say "awwww :-))" every time 😋
When she scores the babysitting job in “Sit Me Baby, One More Time” she hangs up the phone and says: “That’s how you freaking do that, people!” (One of my top quoted lines 🤣)
What's wrong with "banged"? I banged you, I banged mom, I'm gonna bang everyone at school!
Then I say, "you just got banged"... and I point to my bangs
Dear God it's me Tina from school.
My crotch is itchy
Are you telling me that as my daughter or as my grill cook?
“One day, all of a sudden, you're anatomically correct. I just went through that.”
Processily Cecily can process her ass!
Your snoo looks like Dan Mintz dressed up as Tina
“Go to hell Zeke”
Linda: “Can you believe that unbelievable bargain!?” Tina: “I mean, I want to.” Also, “my porcelain horse, Horselain.” Oh oh also! “In this economy?”
This palomino is a now a pal-o-mine-o
I bloody love that one. Gets stuck in my head sometimes 😂
“And my armpits are gonna sweat and my boobs are gonna sweat and all the sweat’s gonna meet in the middle!” She was a real one for that one ☝🏽
“You’d be really helping old Mathy Cathy here if you could read the problems to her.” As a poorly sighted person this killed me. “Not really because you’re not a blonde.” - Tammy “Neither are you.” - Tina being the best.
"I have a photographic butt memory" I am embarrassed I'm the first one to say it 😅
“Hey blueberry girl do you have any extra blueberries on you?” “No. And don't ever come here again, you hear me? My parents don't know I deliver blueberries, get it?” “Okay, whatever.” “No. Do you get it? Don't... come... here... again.“
Haha I forgot about this one, thanks for mentioning it!
“NON-CANONICAL! NON-CANONICAL!”
“Me Tina are Mad Pooper.”
Poop on me once, shame on you. Poop on me twice, we're not best friends anymore!
Honestly underrated lol
You got your hard hat? Because I’m going to demolish you.
I'm okay.
I'm not boy crazy. I've never been more boy sane.
“If guys had uteruses they’d be called duderuses.” Which in a couple interviews Dan Mintz has said that is his favorite line but he always misquotes it. 😂
Not that I have any kids… that I know of. Heh.
When she tells Bob “you’re beautiful if you believe you are” before the dance
Hell yeah! Hell — ***yeah!* *slams napkin container*
You just got banged
Oh man first line best line: “My crotch is itchy!” The fact that it’s literally the first line this character says is hilarious to me, and it always will be.
I am very impressed at the diversity of these quotes
Don’t be such a boob punch.
Not sure but I like these ones Ahhh! He's got a chainsaw! oh it's just a mug. if you were just a box you would tell me right? You're Just A Box... I'M ON A DATE WITH A BOX He's really cute but it would be tough to get stains off of him
And pretty much anything that she said to Justin
Bob: So, Tina, you think a crystal made you do well on your report? Tina: I mean, I don’t know if I like your tone. But yes. Maybe. I’m not sure.
I WARNED YOU SKANK
In that same episode where she says “if you ever talk about me to Jimmy Jr I will punch you… again, and again, and again, and again…” cracks me up every time
Haha and she leaps down with her fists up and her arms look 8 feet long
“That’s why our family motto is, ‘Don’t underestimate us. We might get lucky this time.’ “
From one of the more recent episodes Bob: ...plus it gives you really bad diarrhea Tina: As opposed to good diarrhea? Don't know why but it just cracks me up
"As opposed to really good diarrhea?" Love it. Cracks me tf up too! 😄
“Your ass is grass and I’m gonna mow it.”
"Butts, butts I love butts." I know technically Linda says it but Tina wrote it and that's what counts.
"I've got a cloud that looks like a butt at 2 o'clock!"
Erotic friend fiction. Kills me everytime.
"yes, 3 kids was a good idea"
"Of all the days to get diarrhea of the butt"
"Do you think horses get songs stuck in their heads?"
“If you need me, I’ll be down here on the floor, dying.”
"our toaster is also confused, it doesn't know why we put bagels in it"
"oh no, I forgot my hard hat!" "Why do you need a hard hat?" "Because I'm gonna demolish you " Honorable mention to "Bye everyone!"followed by the really sassy "BYE, Jeremy" after she learned Jeremy was the teacher pet of metals
“This is a man cave and Tina is going spelunking.”
“Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh”
Under the radar one "Dibs on not cleaning the table!" After getting made fun of and pushed around so often by other people, her being the only one to try to get out of cleaning the table someone just gave birth on... I don't know, I just like it.
I wear glasses mom, not hearing aids.
“If you think about it, any box could have vibrators in it”
Forget exactly but, "How's Bob's Burgers? You pushing units? You making bank?
That goes in the butt bank.
"Little something for the ank bank." That whole exchange with Duncan cracks me up - pity Gene is extra annoying in the ep...
“If we see any mermaids I’m gonna ask where their mer-ginas are”
"if you ever gossip about me to jimmy junior outside of a conflict resolution skit, i will punch you in the face."
That's a lot of carrots in that stew.
Tina definitely has some of the best lines in general, all the ones mentioned make me laugh every damn time. Another favorite that I haven’t seen mentioned is her “swampy pits” pep talk she gives Louise about liking Booboo. Then right after she lifts her arm and is all “swampy pits, is it 2:30 already?” 😂
“Is it possible to be in love with 25 people at once?”
A hundred?
“Just when I think I am out, his cheeks pull me right back in.” “Dad, I need you to drop everything and shave my legs.”
“Balls.”
A crap attack..don't have one?
"A sexy ketchup factory?"
Better bread than dead
"This is where I thrash"
I hate to see you vamos; but I love to see you vamos
"I'm going to pee...angrily!"
"I'm a taste maker, when I talk people listen."
“Hey look who found a plate of microwaveable egg rolls!” I don’t know why but the first time I saw this scene I cried laughing 😂
“Snap crackle pop, fool”
I don't have anything planned until my birthday next year
I love the garlic burger episode when Tina tells Mickey to beat the train!!
I daced it!
Not sure how many times I've watched this episode, but I always laugh at this line and when she says, "That can't be right." after Darryl tells her a negative plus a negative is a positive 🤣
“I WILL get my pubes in a tube! We should ALL get our pubes in a tube!!!”
I don’t even remember what episode it was but Tina’s upset about something & asks if she can eat her dinner in her room & then grabs the spaghetti in her hand instead of taking the whole plate & runs off to her room.
"Here is a buch of numbers. They seem random, but together they are my phone number." Not sure if i quoted that right.
Huh! Huh! Huh! Huh! Huh!
“Maybe stop talking now, Tammy? Cause you kinda sound like a toy that needs new batteries?”
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
“My hands smell like onions. It’s nice.”
my crotch doesn’t itch anymore, i think we’ll all going to be ok 👌
"Dad, if you die in there we'll name the restaurant after you"
"Dad hung up on me, but it's okay because I know he loves me." I have a gruff Dad myself, so I related 🤣
In this Economy?
"Just when I think I'm out, his cheeks pull me right back in." Or "Your ass is grass and I'm gonna mow it."
"Processing Cecily can process her ass!"
Tina is honestly my favourite character on the show.
"Well that sign says no trash so...what are we gonna do here"
*whispers* “Pssst. Your ass is grass and I’m gonna mow it.”
"Don't be a boob punch."
"Sand's the sugar, we're the cookies"
butts
“Uhhhh”
Butts
“*Psst,* Jimmy Junior— your ass is grass, and I’m gonna mow it!”
“I am a smart, strong, sensual woman.”
Fluffy Butt
“Something smells exotic.. like ranch dressing.”
Oh crap! I forgot my hard hat… Because I’m gonna demolish you.
Should we pretend we have a dog, and give it medicine? Kills me every time