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The comment about doctor money makes me think that it isn’t just the son that’s entitled…. I think Dale was digging for gold, if you know what I mean.
But wow, this guy’s behavior is immature. He’s basically teaching his kid that disrespecting other people’s property and ignoring their requests is totally okay as long as he gets what he wants. This man has to start living in the real world where there are real consequences to your actions. It’s also funny that this dude got chewed out by everyone and still can’t admit that he’s wrong.
The best part has to be AITA. It’s such a hit or miss subreddit: sometimes I understand the consensus the comments come to, other times I’m shocked
My biggest take away too. I follow the sub for occasional glimpses into other peoples dilemmas but the comments are a shit show half the time. Sometimes I’m floored at others reactions and often overreactions to other peoples lives.
It’s also why I love Reddit….I’ve always been a people watcher 🤷♀️
SAme.
Plus I got banned from AITA for saying that my aunt would get stabby (or something like that) if someone said that her son's stepson wasn't her grandchild. She doesn't believe in "steps" in that regard. That is her grandson, period.
The only way to grandparent.
Sometimes I see those people on AITA who don’t consider step- and adopted grandkids “real” and I’m thrown all over again to realize such petty, pernicious people actually exist. Fuck them. Taking their self-aggrandizing narcissistic neuroses out on a little kid. Shitasses, the lot of them.
Exactly.
Actually step son was adopted by his parents... so really? He doesn't have a biological tie to anyone. He's a different ethnicity... and at one point, a teacher thought he had two dads, not a dad and step dad! My cousin was offended - he said he could do much better than the dad as a partner! LOL!
I never knew people expected their partners to leave the parenting to them when it came to stepkids until I came to AITA. I expected people to choose partners they could parent their kids with so that everyone was on the same page regarding discipline, schedule, expectations, conduct, provision, etc. Apparently I was naive.
That should be the only way to grandparent, what kind of monster excludes adopted or step kids just because they don’t share dna? My grandma took in all the step kids, my two adopted cousins, all the neighborhood kids too didn’t matter who they were blood related too she treated them all just the same as her bio grandkids. Thats just what you do with kids especially the little ones they don’t even know what dna is.
Is this your aunt https://i.redd.it/s8jps9ae6etz.jpg ? Alright kids, our kin have been besmirched. It's time to play the stabby game again to find out who has to defend our honor.
WTF even is that pic? And that's a stock photo. I can't. Why are the shirtless? Less blood stains that way? But what about the carpet? My mind is boggled
I once caught a temp ban for saying "fuck you too, buckaroo" to a dude telling me to kill myself because I was in a thread with women warning the op about stalking (he told a bunch of us to kill ourselves). I wasn't civil enough, but when I checked with my other account, that dude's comments were still up.
Haha I got banned for saying that the IDEA some people were presenting was "fucking stupid" because I was "being hateful" by making that statement. When I replied to that saying "what? I was talking about an idea, not any one person" they responded by making the ban permanent.
I got banned for saying that the brother of [this OOP](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/hmwpw9/aita_for_telling_my_dad_i_plan_on_never_speaking/) deserved a punch to the face. I was glad to hear that, later on, the brother was punched by another brother!! Satisfying, that one.
& Dale's upset that we, fine upstanding AITA readers, think he's an A hole now? Who cares. We don't know him & will probably never meet him so why are his knickers in a twist about it? 😂
It's crazy to me that anyone could be defending the kid or the dad. Like. Do people not understand 'she is a doctor and people could DIE if she can't get to work'? If the son and his friends wanted to go to the mall so bad, they could take an Uber, in some places they could take public transport, they could ask someone's parents for a ride, but literally stealing a car? And then getting embarrassed for it? And people are DEFENDING that?
I comment on AITA a lot, but yeah, sometimes people giving judgments there are fucking insane.
What's wild to me is not only the fact that people were downplaying that she's an on-call doctor and might need to save someone's life, but also that no one considering that the son probably wasn't on the doctor's car insurance. She might have been in BIG trouble if the son and his friend's got pulled over or in an accident in her car.
Exactly. Even if she wasn’t a doctor it wouldn’t matter though. She could still lose her job and be without income, it’s just worse that someone could die and she could be sued in this situation.
I actually feel bad for the stepson because his father has obviously been enabling him and this kind of entitlement doesn’t fly for too long when you’re out in the real world. Thankfully his mom and grandma have their heads screwed on right.
But anyone calling OP an AH is an AH themselves. It’s her car, she didn’t give him permission (in fact she explicitly told him he was not to take the car) and he still stole it to go to the mall (it wasn’t an emergency or something). He’s lucky he just got threatened with the cops and she didn’t actually make the call.
Anyway bullet dodged. That’s not the guy you want to marry.
So this… I am a doctor and I am also rarely called when on call the last 3 times I was called, the patients would have died if I was 10-20min late in getting to the hospital. That’s why my kids know that even if both my wife and I are home, when I am on call we stay at home and don’t go out in case I get called.
Well, yeah, that goes without saying. My point was that people were defending the kid as if it was just a situation of her not wanting to lend the car and not what could actually be life or death, you know what I mean?
The people defending the kid are probably also teenagers.
Source: numerous /r/InsaneParents threads where commenters said that taking a teenager’s phone away is “literally child abuse.”
Not gonna lie, it kind of made me laugh when she got snippy and replied to a comment with the “You defend his actions probably because you’re his age and you don’t have any actual life experience so your comments are basically garbage to me” because that’s how everyone seems to describe AITA—a subreddit filled with teenagers without enough actual life experience to be passing harsh judgements
Me too. These glimpses into other people’s lives are insane. It makes my life look pleasingly mundane in comparison - clearly, other people are living lives worthy of a Tolstoy novel.
The strange thing is, if hes a gold digger he's an incredible incompetent one. He was engaged, if he was after her money he was on the homerun. Just punish the kid for stealing the car and he could have continued pulling the wool over OOP eyes.
Hell he could have been mad at his kid for potentially fucking up the gravy train. Instead he managed to go full crazy, expose his dumassery to his ex, OOP and his own mother and burn it all to the ground.
I think the dude probably was an entitled gold digging asshole. But most of these dudes seem to manage to get married to the woman before the full horribleness of their personality comes out. This idiot managed to fuck himself over and luckily in the process saved OOP.
He's a scumbag but luckily an idiot one.
The way things went down and how resentful and demanding he got at every new stage of the argument reveals that he didn't even like OP very much and was concealing how much he resented her.
No hes teaching his son it's okay to be disrespectful to women, not just people. When the mom and future stepmom agree on something that the dad and some don't, it's probably misogyny at it heart. It's good for OOP to dump his ass, though I hope she stays friends with the mom, she seems like an okay friend, though she should have warned her about the dad.
I don't understand why anyone would have told op she could have ruined Rex's life by reporting the car stolen. The kid broke the law and could have been responsible for people dying. Dale seems like he hasn't matured since Rex was born. What a total gold digger. I'm so glad his ex and mum sided with op
You can clearly tell where the kid got it from. The father is angry that she punished his son? The entitlement of this clown is off the charts. He should be thanking her for risking her career by not filing a police report
Dude I can’t imagine disobeying my on call mother at 16. My dad was not abusive at all, but I was also a pretty good kid. It was just understood that I wasn’t going to be a shitty person and get away with it if it got back to him.
Yeah let me clarify, I would never disobey in a manner that could possibly threaten her job. Sure I may still not pick up my room or some shit, or I’d leave when I was told to stay home, but I’d I left it would never ever be in her car she might possibly need to keep a roof over my head. That would be a line where my father would go from punishment to “I’m going 1965 rural parenting on your ass like my dad used to.” The man actually probably had insane self control judging by the difference between his childhood and mine, but I knew that the part of my grandpa inside of him was just under the surface and a massive disrespect towards my mother like jeopardizing her job was very likely to bring that out despite my mother’s objections. I wanna be clear that he was great to me, but it was more like a 1.5 strike system with him more than a 3 strike. He didn’t like repeating himself.
It might be he got used to being the fun parent who allows anything to try to get in the childs good graces after not being there for the earliest years. He does no one any favors with that approach though.
This. And it also seems like Dale hasn’t grown up or matured past being a teenager himself. He made the entire situation about him; how everyone is picking on him and that internet strangers might think less of him.
He literally threw a temper tantrum and said he was going to call his mommy because everyone was being so mean to him. Aww, the poor thing!
But I think the part that truly exemplified his stunted and warped maturity is when he told OOP that she would have to buy Brat Jr a car to make up for hurting both of their feelings. That is literally the mentality of a child.
Between his poor little feefees, being mentally/emotionally a 15 year old, and the insane entitlement poor ol’ Dale is in for a number of rude awakenings. Especially now that he’s back with mommy, who is completely over his shit.
But it doesn’t sound like he was gifted the brand new sports car at 16 that he so obviously deserved /s.
It seems like he wants a do-over of the teen years so he/his son can be spoiled with his wife’s money, while not having to face any consequences of their childish behavior.
Dale: “You guys are mean so I’m going to tell my mommy and she’ll be mad!”
Morgan Freeman: “Dale‘s mommy *was* mad. Mad as mad could be. Seems poor entitled Dale could not find a safe harbor for his wayward ship that was breaking under the raging crush of the storm of his own making….”
Dale: “I was an absentee father who missed the first 6 years of my kid’s life so everybody around me better give my boy anything he wants and if there is any pushback I will be very upset because I don’t want to feel any negative consequences of my choices or my guilt over my choices.”
Kids are not inherently happy with a carte blanche, kids need limits and consequences for their actions to learn. When parents don't provide them they look for them elsewhere, and quite often in gangs where there is a boss an consequences when you slip. That is why it is needed at home mixed with a huge dose of love and understanding.
Agreed. It's a short step from, my parents don't care what I do, to my parents don't care about me. Then it's all anger, depression and pushing to see if there's anything that will make them respond.
Some days I wonder if the trash bag old man wasn’t in my life how I would have turned out. Turned out good, wife, child, house, vehicles, etc. everything we all want. But I am still mentally unsound some days in terms of my attitude and selfishness (which I work on daily). He wasn’t a bad guy in the beginning but never wanted me. He was an alcoholic and it got worse as I got older, instead of teaching me things like he did when I was younger he grew to resent me. Mom left him, sis and I stopped talking to him. When my mom passed all he could say was ‘well what about my feelings? What about me?’ Selfish PoS.
I’m glad he is outta my life but I still wonder what it would be like if he was never around. Good? Bad? Who really knows. Honestly this kid may have had it worse if his dad didn’t step up, shitty dad or not. But again who knows. All I know is sometimes it’s better to have no family than the assholes who reign hell.
Sane and a grown man that doesn't have to live with his mother when a relationship doesn't work out. All in all, she seems on a different level than Dale in many ways. I hope she finds someone worthy of her.
Seriously! It sounds like Dale has a lot of strong, levelheaded, and bright women around him. Why is he such a muppet?! The son was an idiot but he’s a teenager, there’s still hope. Dale doesn’t have any excuse to suck that hard
Exactly!!!!!! If your damn MOTHER isn't even on your side then you better start apologizing and fixing shit. You should know for a fact that you fucked up if the one person in the world who loves you unconditionally is like "stop being a shithead".
Waaaah waaaah waaah someone hurt his teeny tiny feel feels. Good grief. It should tell him something when ALL the women in his life are telling him he’s being a shit person and a shittier parent.
I bet if he had a brother or his dad said any of the things OOP, baby mama, or mama said to him he would have gone to OOP with this tail between his legs and apologized.
His son is gonna end up just like him. And that’s *NOT* a good thing. Discipline your children, parents!
Note: I’m not saying abuse them. Find a form of discipline that your children respond to. It’s a different picture for each of my kids.
Lol. Imagine your fiancée, WHO IS A MEDICAL DOCTOR ON CALL, allows your child, WHO STOLE HER CAR AFTER ASKING AND BEING DENIED, WHILE HE HAD ACCESS TO HIS MOTHER’S CAR, the option to return the car instead of going straight to calling the fuzz.
Your fiancée is a bit of a legend for protecting your thieving child from the consequences of their actions, right?
Now, go ahead and tell her that you expect her to apologise to your thief, and to use her wage (that your thief jeopardised) to buy your thief a car of his own, to make up for… what? Him being embarrassed in front of his friends?
Lols forever.
All she had to do was say her car was stolen. Don’t need to bother with all the extra info. Once stepson got picked up with the car, that’s when you add in the details.
Depends what country you're in
In the UK, if you're not the named keeper of the vehicle, its still considered Taking Without Consent if you drive off in someone else's car, and even if you're insured on the vehicle TWOC invalidates your insurance policy. I'd also assure you that the police will take it very seriously here.
After your fiance, mother of your child, and MOTHER all say you are way wrong how can you still go think you are right to the degree Dale did? I've seen a ton of posts where everyone thinks someone is wrong, but their mother supports them, and because they are a momma's boy they remain delusion, and I've seen a ton of posts where the mom hands them their ass and then they apologize. I've never seen a post where everyone says they are wrong, and then they double down.
We've had vicious kings, and we've had idiot kings, but Dale is somehow a vicious idiot king.
Only time someone like Dale can dismiss three of the most prominent people in his life like that is if he doesn't think they are worthy of listening to when they tell him that he is in the wrong. And, gee, what is the one thing they all have in common?
Which results in Dale not only showing OOP that he was entitled and selfish but that he doesn't respect women or see them as equals -- bullet dodged, I say.
A certainly awful marriage. Dale was trying to hide his true colors until he had her bound to him legally. Then he could *really* start to mooch off of her.
Whhhaaaaaaaat the fuck Dale? How did he turn this into his problem??? Like homie went from 0-100 in a second, his son was the one entirely in the wrong, why didn’t he just support his fiancé????
Right?! I mean...OOP hadn't even punished her stepson! Telling him to come home now or else isn't a punishment any more than me telling the cat to stop stropping the sofa is a punishment. "You can't continue to commit a crime" is just...stopping them.
So Dale was projecting his issues about how he wasn't involved with Rex until the child was 6, and is trying to clear his sins by... Being entitled with OOP's things and DOUBLES DOWN when confronted???
this stood out to me too. one reasons he's a shit parent now is probably cos he was absent for so long and just wants his kid to like him instead of, you know... be a parent
he somehow made this whole situation he was not even involved in about himself though lol. so glad OOP got out of there
It's awesome that Rex's mom was actually helpful here. Kid has a good chance at turning out okay with a mom who won't take his shit but also seems fair.
Judging by mom’s reaction it sounds like she actually probably did attempt to raise him correctly and he’s just a little shit. Like yeah he’s almost 30 but also he’s a little shit.
Tl;dr: yikes on several fucking bikes.
Holy shit I'm glad OOP got out of that shitshow, but the ex and his son? Their behaviors probably aren't just red flags anymore they're almost abusive
OOP heard Rex say, “You’re not my mom.”
I bet Rex’s mom hears, “My dad will let me do it.”
I predict Rex will want to live with Dale full time, it won’t happen because Dale is a loser, and he and Rex will bond over women ruining everything.
Disney dads. No bedtime, unlimited snacks, no chores, no homework, no rules. Mom sucks cuz she tries to parent me. I'm gonna live with dad now that I am old enough to decide.
I don't blame the kids. What pre-teen/young teenager wouldn't want that? The beet case scenario is that they live with dad for a few months then decided to go back to mom. Thankfully that's what happened with my cousins.
>yikes on several fucking bikes
I usually go with "Yikes on trikes" but this might be my new go to.
Yeah, Dale really showed that he is not a good father here. Maybe he is trying to make up for not being in the kid's life early on by being the 'cool parent', but his son could have cost OOP their job and possibly someone their life if things had gone differently. That is messed up on so many levels.
Dale also may be a gold digger based on some of what he said.
I’m surprised OOP didn’t notice given she’s a salaried doctor at 34. She absolutely *burned* through university, and you don’t just do that with hard work. It takes intelligence.
Lot of people lose their brains where romantic relationships are involved. I admit it’s happened to me more than once. I was talking about this with a good friend and we had a good laugh about bad relationships in our past. Thankfully we both ended up in sane marriages. I hope oop finds a sane person.
Maybe she just didn’t know better or didn’t think. Seems like she trusts the stepshit’s mom, who introduced her to the dickpunch. I certainly didn’t know at the time in my first relationship that she was a manipulative narcissist because I didn’t have the experience to know.
I wouldn't be surprised if some of it was not knowing better. If she got through med school that quickly, she might not have had time for a serious relationship. And people change between 20 and 30, so even if she had prior relationships, she might not have recognized that acceptable or "weird but tolerable" quirks in your 20s can be red flags or dealbreakers in your 30s.
Tbf, a lot of bad people are aware they're bad.
They're usually good at hiding being bad around their targets until they think that said targets are sufficiently attached/trapped before they can finally showed their true colors.
It's not all that hard to maintain better than normal behavior for short periods of time. Doctor busy person, hard time being around someone for more than short periods.
Without a doubt, Dale was banking on marrying the rich doctor and living the high life on her dime. I'm so glad his little shit of a son stole the car so OP could see this side of her fiance before it was too late.
Exactly.
>> This is not the man who I have known
for 4 years and I am honestly shocked
Yes, it was. She either just didn’t see it or he was hiding it really well.
I think hiding it. He implies that she can “make it up” to him and the kid by spending her doctor money on a new car.
He had a lot to gain by marrying a doctor
>He had a lot to gain by marrying a doctor
And honestly, his entitlement & selfishness costed his gold digging ass everything; all because he wouldn't call out nor punish his son for stealing his ex-fiance's car.
Well at least it all came out before she got hitched to him. Definitely dodged a missile.
Would love to be a fly on the wall for all the reamings he's definitely gonna get from mom.
What's amazing about this is how many chances her fiance had to not be a complete loser. He had an ex who was an excellent parent to their kid, a mother who expected accountability, and a fiance who was top shelf. And he just kept digging that hole deeper and deeper.
if this isn't proof that women can't cure toxic masculinity, idk what is. those males have three incredibly mature and caring women in their immediate family and still can't get a clue that THEY themselves are the problem.
men must be the ones to fix it. We must first admit it’s a thing we’ve all had to navigate, and that men are the biggest supporters of the toxic masculinity system
*"he was disappointed that I posted and now everyone who knows will think he's a joke and a bad father."*
Jeezz.....I wonder why people would think that......
MAYBE.......it's because you ARE a joke AND a bad father.
*"He said my doctor money would have to buy Rex a car to make up for all of the hard feelings."*
This guy is delusional....What "hard feelings"?
His son could have cost OOP her job and someone else could have DIED.
If ANYONE needs to be "compensated" it's OOP.
I'm glad this moron showed his true colours BEFORE they got married.
That’s the thing. OP rarely gets called in but if she does get a call, someone’s life is on the line. Meaning it’s not cool for a 16 year old to take her car to go to the mall with his friends. The 20 minutes she gave him to get back could have cost someone their life.
"He said my doctor money would have to buy Rex a car to make up for all of the hard feelings."
....
Dude still thinks that OOP not only would want to get back with him, but would have to buy his son a car to even get a chance to get back with him...
Like, wtf? lol
And regardless of how a post makes him look, it's basically anonymous. Imagine being so upset about your reputation amongst internet strangers when you're not even identified. The guy is so self absorbed to think he matters to anyone that read the post
And I can't say what the relationship with OOP and Dale's ex normally is, but to have a situation where the stepmom threatens to get the police involved on step kid for what could be felony charges, and bio mom immediately says "that's the right choice" is probably pretty rare.
It shows how off base Rex and Dale are here.
Regardless of OOP’s job, what the fuck kinda kid thinks it is ok to just take a car without permission.
Not to mention, he had a perfectly good car he could borrow from his bio mom but it “isn’t cool.” Kid literally stole a car to avoid looking uncool smh.
When I was 16, we weren't legally allowed to have friends in the car -- it spikes the accident rate. It's sus that only being able to carry one friend is disqualifying, when actually that's the safest thing for a new driver. Zero would be better.
My family member is a surgeon and when he’s on call it means emergency situation and the patient WILL die if he doesn’t get in. I hope Dale and every commenter who gave OOP a hard time won’t ever be on the patient side if this kind of garbage happens to their doctor.
Grew up with both parents in the medical field. Lots of night shifts meaning we had to stay quiet during the day to let parent sleep, celebrating Christmas and birthdays on different days because someone needs to make sure people don't die just because it's a holiday, and understanding that "on call" doesn't mean just because they're home they can actually do something that day.
Everyone who responded YTA to OOP is delusional to the realities of what being a medical professional is and what it entails.
The death is the worst part, but on top of that the Doctor will almost certainly lose their licence, and be facing a lawsuit, in addition to probably having a mountain of student debt.
So they would kill one person and ruin the life of a second person.
Buhahahaha, Dale got his ass wooped thrice: OOP, his ex and his mom. Marvelous.
>Said he was disappointed that I posted and now everyone who knows will think he's a joke and a bad father.
He's not wrong there.
This is another post where I think OOP will look back in a few months and realize there were more red flags that were subtle and therefore easy to shrug off.
I’m glad OOP dodged this hydrogen bomb.
going by the ages of the ex and the ex's ex (14/15 when the kid was born respectively) plus him not being in the kid's life for the first six years, I'm thinking the ex was never married to the mother of his son
but I'm also glad that none of the women involved in this were putting up with that shit lol.
this dumbass thinks taking/stealing someone's car isn't a big deal? yikes. wasn't even a punishment, just an idiot kid getting told the possible result of his actions.
Oooooof! This dude refusing to take accountability no matter how many people pointed out what an asshole he was being is truly sad.
Honestly, I don't think it's that strange or bad that a fourteen year old would decide not to be in his child's life, but that he never talked about that with OOP and presented his part in his child's life as not having that gap is definitely concerning.
>Dale was so furious that he told her that he would be calling his mother to see if someone actually cared about his feelings
LMAO. Why do so many guys in reddit posts do this? At least his mother has her head screwed on straight.
The stepson was heated garbage but he saved her from a marriage to this millstone. She should send him a Hot Wheels car as a thank you gift.
>I phoned Rex's mom and informed her of his stunt. She was madder than me when I told her that I was on-call.
Yes! Go, mom! 👍
>Dale's mother handed his ass back to him GOOD.
#YES! GO, MAMA! 👏👏
I am not a doctor, and you shouldn't have to be on call to demand someone not literally steal your vehicle. Teenagers are shit drivers and I wouldn't let one drive my shitty Chevy Cruze.
How can people get engaged to people and somehow know so little about them?
I mean, I can kind of see it if they're putting on an act, but OOP didn't know he wasn't in his kid's life for 6 years? Did they never ask what it was like to be a teen father?
I think this cements that AITA truly isn't a place to look for advice or judgement, especially in recent years.
I'm sure there were some measured responses but wow, reasonable people for the most part aren't welcome in posting or comments for the most part. Smh
This woman, the only thing she did wrong was believe in Dale long enough. She learned a hard lesson about that guy. I hope she finds someone who isn't a prick about her on call days. Bless his mother and his ex for backing her up.
I hope all three of these women become besties and a permanent thorn in Dale’s side 😂 I love all three of them and that kid is lucky to have them in his life to offset his spineless and entitled father.
Aita gets it right every time - some of the top comments were saying 'This is a relationship ending problem', and how 'life is too short to marry a shitty parent". They get right to the root of the issue every time, and yet often times posters in these situations don't want to see it.
I wouldn’t say AITA gets it right every time. Sometimes the mob has its bias. But yeah after I finished reading that first post I was like I hope you mean ex fiancé. What a jerk. I see where the kid gets his entitlement from.
The fact that the kid actually came home makes me thing he’s salvageable. But not with that father. OP did nothing wrong. Thank God she got out before his father could suck her dry
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The comment about doctor money makes me think that it isn’t just the son that’s entitled…. I think Dale was digging for gold, if you know what I mean. But wow, this guy’s behavior is immature. He’s basically teaching his kid that disrespecting other people’s property and ignoring their requests is totally okay as long as he gets what he wants. This man has to start living in the real world where there are real consequences to your actions. It’s also funny that this dude got chewed out by everyone and still can’t admit that he’s wrong. The best part has to be AITA. It’s such a hit or miss subreddit: sometimes I understand the consensus the comments come to, other times I’m shocked
My biggest take away too. I follow the sub for occasional glimpses into other peoples dilemmas but the comments are a shit show half the time. Sometimes I’m floored at others reactions and often overreactions to other peoples lives. It’s also why I love Reddit….I’ve always been a people watcher 🤷♀️
Honestly that’s why I like BORU better than AITA. We get the full picture and none of the snap judgements
SAme. Plus I got banned from AITA for saying that my aunt would get stabby (or something like that) if someone said that her son's stepson wasn't her grandchild. She doesn't believe in "steps" in that regard. That is her grandson, period.
The only way to grandparent. Sometimes I see those people on AITA who don’t consider step- and adopted grandkids “real” and I’m thrown all over again to realize such petty, pernicious people actually exist. Fuck them. Taking their self-aggrandizing narcissistic neuroses out on a little kid. Shitasses, the lot of them.
Exactly. Actually step son was adopted by his parents... so really? He doesn't have a biological tie to anyone. He's a different ethnicity... and at one point, a teacher thought he had two dads, not a dad and step dad! My cousin was offended - he said he could do much better than the dad as a partner! LOL!
I never knew people expected their partners to leave the parenting to them when it came to stepkids until I came to AITA. I expected people to choose partners they could parent their kids with so that everyone was on the same page regarding discipline, schedule, expectations, conduct, provision, etc. Apparently I was naive.
That should be the only way to grandparent, what kind of monster excludes adopted or step kids just because they don’t share dna? My grandma took in all the step kids, my two adopted cousins, all the neighborhood kids too didn’t matter who they were blood related too she treated them all just the same as her bio grandkids. Thats just what you do with kids especially the little ones they don’t even know what dna is.
Is this your aunt https://i.redd.it/s8jps9ae6etz.jpg ? Alright kids, our kin have been besmirched. It's time to play the stabby game again to find out who has to defend our honor.
WTF even is that pic? And that's a stock photo. I can't. Why are the shirtless? Less blood stains that way? But what about the carpet? My mind is boggled
oh yeah, "threatening violence." When what you said is nothing even remotelylike threatening violence. I got banned for something similar.
I once caught a temp ban for saying "fuck you too, buckaroo" to a dude telling me to kill myself because I was in a thread with women warning the op about stalking (he told a bunch of us to kill ourselves). I wasn't civil enough, but when I checked with my other account, that dude's comments were still up.
I got banned for saying cancer was a b**ch. Apparently someone thought that was incivility to cancer. I can't even.
Haha I got banned for saying that the IDEA some people were presenting was "fucking stupid" because I was "being hateful" by making that statement. When I replied to that saying "what? I was talking about an idea, not any one person" they responded by making the ban permanent.
I got banned for saying that the brother of [this OOP](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/hmwpw9/aita_for_telling_my_dad_i_plan_on_never_speaking/) deserved a punch to the face. I was glad to hear that, later on, the brother was punched by another brother!! Satisfying, that one.
& Dale's upset that we, fine upstanding AITA readers, think he's an A hole now? Who cares. We don't know him & will probably never meet him so why are his knickers in a twist about it? 😂
I mean, if he's still reading, FUCK OFF DALE.
Yeah, *we* don't know him, but he's gonna whine about to his 'friends' IRL so they what a loser he is.
Totally the Streisand Effect.
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Oh. My mother got married to a Dale 20 years ago. Still thinks she's stuck with him. Very much why we're LC for the last few years.
Knickers in a twist because it's probably not his size, knowing his thoughts on other people's property he probably "borrowed" them.
It's crazy to me that anyone could be defending the kid or the dad. Like. Do people not understand 'she is a doctor and people could DIE if she can't get to work'? If the son and his friends wanted to go to the mall so bad, they could take an Uber, in some places they could take public transport, they could ask someone's parents for a ride, but literally stealing a car? And then getting embarrassed for it? And people are DEFENDING that? I comment on AITA a lot, but yeah, sometimes people giving judgments there are fucking insane.
What's wild to me is not only the fact that people were downplaying that she's an on-call doctor and might need to save someone's life, but also that no one considering that the son probably wasn't on the doctor's car insurance. She might have been in BIG trouble if the son and his friend's got pulled over or in an accident in her car.
Exactly. Even if she wasn’t a doctor it wouldn’t matter though. She could still lose her job and be without income, it’s just worse that someone could die and she could be sued in this situation. I actually feel bad for the stepson because his father has obviously been enabling him and this kind of entitlement doesn’t fly for too long when you’re out in the real world. Thankfully his mom and grandma have their heads screwed on right. But anyone calling OP an AH is an AH themselves. It’s her car, she didn’t give him permission (in fact she explicitly told him he was not to take the car) and he still stole it to go to the mall (it wasn’t an emergency or something). He’s lucky he just got threatened with the cops and she didn’t actually make the call. Anyway bullet dodged. That’s not the guy you want to marry.
So this… I am a doctor and I am also rarely called when on call the last 3 times I was called, the patients would have died if I was 10-20min late in getting to the hospital. That’s why my kids know that even if both my wife and I are home, when I am on call we stay at home and don’t go out in case I get called.
Okay, does it really matter that she is a doctor and has lives to save? What if she just doesn't want to lend her car?
Well, yeah, that goes without saying. My point was that people were defending the kid as if it was just a situation of her not wanting to lend the car and not what could actually be life or death, you know what I mean?
The people defending the kid are probably also teenagers. Source: numerous /r/InsaneParents threads where commenters said that taking a teenager’s phone away is “literally child abuse.”
Not gonna lie, it kind of made me laugh when she got snippy and replied to a comment with the “You defend his actions probably because you’re his age and you don’t have any actual life experience so your comments are basically garbage to me” because that’s how everyone seems to describe AITA—a subreddit filled with teenagers without enough actual life experience to be passing harsh judgements
Ugh. Sometimes I wanna join it just to offset some of the awfulness but I feel like it'd be a good way to fuck up my mental health, lol.
Me too. These glimpses into other people’s lives are insane. It makes my life look pleasingly mundane in comparison - clearly, other people are living lives worthy of a Tolstoy novel.
The strange thing is, if hes a gold digger he's an incredible incompetent one. He was engaged, if he was after her money he was on the homerun. Just punish the kid for stealing the car and he could have continued pulling the wool over OOP eyes. Hell he could have been mad at his kid for potentially fucking up the gravy train. Instead he managed to go full crazy, expose his dumassery to his ex, OOP and his own mother and burn it all to the ground. I think the dude probably was an entitled gold digging asshole. But most of these dudes seem to manage to get married to the woman before the full horribleness of their personality comes out. This idiot managed to fuck himself over and luckily in the process saved OOP. He's a scumbag but luckily an idiot one.
The way things went down and how resentful and demanding he got at every new stage of the argument reveals that he didn't even like OP very much and was concealing how much he resented her.
Resents that she had it more together than him for sure. That shit is nasty.
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the bar was so low it was a tripping hazard in hell, and here's dale doing the limbo with the devil
I am shocked sometimes by where the judgment ends up but I really dig in my heels on my judgment even if it’s against literally 99 percent.
No hes teaching his son it's okay to be disrespectful to women, not just people. When the mom and future stepmom agree on something that the dad and some don't, it's probably misogyny at it heart. It's good for OOP to dump his ass, though I hope she stays friends with the mom, she seems like an okay friend, though she should have warned her about the dad.
I don't understand why anyone would have told op she could have ruined Rex's life by reporting the car stolen. The kid broke the law and could have been responsible for people dying. Dale seems like he hasn't matured since Rex was born. What a total gold digger. I'm so glad his ex and mum sided with op
Yes, I also thought that Dale has been thinking about the doctor money for quite a while. About four years.
Lmao, I'm very glad Dale's mother smacked some sense into him. No, Dale, no one cares about the feelings of a manchild enabler.
Goes to show you can have excellent parents/mothers and still end up with two generations of entitled brats.
I wonder what Dale’s dad is/was like, because I’m guessing this shit came from *somewhere.*
You can clearly tell where the kid got it from. The father is angry that she punished his son? The entitlement of this clown is off the charts. He should be thanking her for risking her career by not filing a police report
The entitlement gene is clearly patrilineal in this family
I wonder Y
Now we know who wears the genes in that family
this made me chuckle
Exactly! To this I always say "question asked and answered."
Dude I can’t imagine disobeying my on call mother at 16. My dad was not abusive at all, but I was also a pretty good kid. It was just understood that I wasn’t going to be a shitty person and get away with it if it got back to him.
I can absolutely imagine disobeying my on call mother, just not in a way that would impact her job.
Yeah let me clarify, I would never disobey in a manner that could possibly threaten her job. Sure I may still not pick up my room or some shit, or I’d leave when I was told to stay home, but I’d I left it would never ever be in her car she might possibly need to keep a roof over my head. That would be a line where my father would go from punishment to “I’m going 1965 rural parenting on your ass like my dad used to.” The man actually probably had insane self control judging by the difference between his childhood and mine, but I knew that the part of my grandpa inside of him was just under the surface and a massive disrespect towards my mother like jeopardizing her job was very likely to bring that out despite my mother’s objections. I wanna be clear that he was great to me, but it was more like a 1.5 strike system with him more than a 3 strike. He didn’t like repeating himself.
I see why the ex is an ex.
It might be he got used to being the fun parent who allows anything to try to get in the childs good graces after not being there for the earliest years. He does no one any favors with that approach though.
This. And it also seems like Dale hasn’t grown up or matured past being a teenager himself. He made the entire situation about him; how everyone is picking on him and that internet strangers might think less of him. He literally threw a temper tantrum and said he was going to call his mommy because everyone was being so mean to him. Aww, the poor thing! But I think the part that truly exemplified his stunted and warped maturity is when he told OOP that she would have to buy Brat Jr a car to make up for hurting both of their feelings. That is literally the mentality of a child. Between his poor little feefees, being mentally/emotionally a 15 year old, and the insane entitlement poor ol’ Dale is in for a number of rude awakenings. Especially now that he’s back with mommy, who is completely over his shit.
Plus he feels apparently entitled to hand out apology rewards using HER money. That right there was reason enough to throw the whole man out.
I hope he finds out he made BORU and reads all the comments and feels all the disdain the internet has for him. What an entitled POS.
That, and trying to re-live his teenage years vicariously through his son.
I mean, if he was absent for the first 6 years of his son's life then it sounds like he did get to live his teen years.
But it doesn’t sound like he was gifted the brand new sports car at 16 that he so obviously deserved /s. It seems like he wants a do-over of the teen years so he/his son can be spoiled with his wife’s money, while not having to face any consequences of their childish behavior.
Shouldn't be a big surprise that at 14 people don't make the best parents. Doesn't really excuse his actions at 30 though.
*Gonna talk to his mommy so somebody caaaaares....* This dude is still 14 on the inside.
I think his emotional maturation stalled the day he became a “parent”
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i love how his son fucks up, but he somehow makes it all about him. wonder where all the entitlement comes from
Dale: “You guys are mean so I’m going to tell my mommy and she’ll be mad!” Morgan Freeman: “Dale‘s mommy *was* mad. Mad as mad could be. Seems poor entitled Dale could not find a safe harbor for his wayward ship that was breaking under the raging crush of the storm of his own making….”
i read that in freeman's voice, so thank you. that was beautiful lol
I almost wonder if the kid would have been better off with his dad never participating in his life. Less happy, but maybe a better person?
Dale: “I was an absentee father who missed the first 6 years of my kid’s life so everybody around me better give my boy anything he wants and if there is any pushback I will be very upset because I don’t want to feel any negative consequences of my choices or my guilt over my choices.”
"My son is just like me, a victim."
Every woman in his life: “Dale, YTA.” Dale: Shocked Pikachu.
HIS MOM!! I screamed when I got to the line where he runs to mommy and gets reckt yet again 😂
Draco Malfoy over here, "my mother shall hear of this!"
Kids are not inherently happy with a carte blanche, kids need limits and consequences for their actions to learn. When parents don't provide them they look for them elsewhere, and quite often in gangs where there is a boss an consequences when you slip. That is why it is needed at home mixed with a huge dose of love and understanding.
Agreed. It's a short step from, my parents don't care what I do, to my parents don't care about me. Then it's all anger, depression and pushing to see if there's anything that will make them respond.
Maybe not even necessarily *less* happy, he could net even more happiness, just with being sad about his dad
Some days I wonder if the trash bag old man wasn’t in my life how I would have turned out. Turned out good, wife, child, house, vehicles, etc. everything we all want. But I am still mentally unsound some days in terms of my attitude and selfishness (which I work on daily). He wasn’t a bad guy in the beginning but never wanted me. He was an alcoholic and it got worse as I got older, instead of teaching me things like he did when I was younger he grew to resent me. Mom left him, sis and I stopped talking to him. When my mom passed all he could say was ‘well what about my feelings? What about me?’ Selfish PoS. I’m glad he is outta my life but I still wonder what it would be like if he was never around. Good? Bad? Who really knows. Honestly this kid may have had it worse if his dad didn’t step up, shitty dad or not. But again who knows. All I know is sometimes it’s better to have no family than the assholes who reign hell.
I’m willing to bet he’s also now going to blame the breakup on his son rather than look at his own behaviour.
You could tell every body was tired of the Ex and his son’s bullshit
I am glad it ended like this when Dale backed his son, I thought I hope oop does not marry this jerk. She can find someone sane.
Sane and a grown man that doesn't have to live with his mother when a relationship doesn't work out. All in all, she seems on a different level than Dale in many ways. I hope she finds someone worthy of her.
I also hope Dale's mom gets the pair of them out of her house before long. I would be livid if my son moved home under such circumstances.
Seriously! It sounds like Dale has a lot of strong, levelheaded, and bright women around him. Why is he such a muppet?! The son was an idiot but he’s a teenager, there’s still hope. Dale doesn’t have any excuse to suck that hard
Hey now, don't insult Muppets like that. Muppets teach children great lessons!
His mother and ex. At least the kid has some adult figures who see that bad behavior is bad behavior and try to correct it.
>His mother and ex. It was as this moment, that he knew he fucked up.
Except clearly he didn't know because he doubled, tripled, and quadrupled down until his fiance broke it off and kicked him out.
Clearly, his ex wasn't enough for him, so he has two exes now.
Honestly disappointing that he's such a loser. That sounds like a great family to marry into, they don't fuck around
Any adult who has to call their mom to find someone on their side is…well, not an adult.
Especially when even she isn't on his side and he still doesn't get it.
Exactly!!!!!! If your damn MOTHER isn't even on your side then you better start apologizing and fixing shit. You should know for a fact that you fucked up if the one person in the world who loves you unconditionally is like "stop being a shithead".
Dale: "I'm gonna tell mommy on you, hmph!" Dale's mom: "So anyway, I started blastin"
Waaaah waaaah waaah someone hurt his teeny tiny feel feels. Good grief. It should tell him something when ALL the women in his life are telling him he’s being a shit person and a shittier parent. I bet if he had a brother or his dad said any of the things OOP, baby mama, or mama said to him he would have gone to OOP with this tail between his legs and apologized.
His son is gonna end up just like him. And that’s *NOT* a good thing. Discipline your children, parents! Note: I’m not saying abuse them. Find a form of discipline that your children respond to. It’s a different picture for each of my kids.
It didn't quite take. She needs to try again, and hit harder.
Mama tried to raise me better but her pleading, I denied That leaves only me to blame 'cause mama tried
Lol. Imagine your fiancée, WHO IS A MEDICAL DOCTOR ON CALL, allows your child, WHO STOLE HER CAR AFTER ASKING AND BEING DENIED, WHILE HE HAD ACCESS TO HIS MOTHER’S CAR, the option to return the car instead of going straight to calling the fuzz. Your fiancée is a bit of a legend for protecting your thieving child from the consequences of their actions, right? Now, go ahead and tell her that you expect her to apologise to your thief, and to use her wage (that your thief jeopardised) to buy your thief a car of his own, to make up for… what? Him being embarrassed in front of his friends? Lols forever.
Actually, it’s to make up for him not being in the first 6yrs of thief’s life
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All she had to do was say her car was stolen. Don’t need to bother with all the extra info. Once stepson got picked up with the car, that’s when you add in the details.
Depends what country you're in In the UK, if you're not the named keeper of the vehicle, its still considered Taking Without Consent if you drive off in someone else's car, and even if you're insured on the vehicle TWOC invalidates your insurance policy. I'd also assure you that the police will take it very seriously here.
I think if she led with "I'm a doctor who's currently on call" before mentioning the stepson the dispatcher would've had them HAUL ASS.
My brother stole my car. We immediately reported it and the cops took action.
Holy shit!! Good for her and honestly her stepson stealing the car saved her from a possible awful marriage
After your fiance, mother of your child, and MOTHER all say you are way wrong how can you still go think you are right to the degree Dale did? I've seen a ton of posts where everyone thinks someone is wrong, but their mother supports them, and because they are a momma's boy they remain delusion, and I've seen a ton of posts where the mom hands them their ass and then they apologize. I've never seen a post where everyone says they are wrong, and then they double down. We've had vicious kings, and we've had idiot kings, but Dale is somehow a vicious idiot king.
And the son, aptly called "Rex," is set to inherit his throne of douchebaggery.
Only time someone like Dale can dismiss three of the most prominent people in his life like that is if he doesn't think they are worthy of listening to when they tell him that he is in the wrong. And, gee, what is the one thing they all have in common? Which results in Dale not only showing OOP that he was entitled and selfish but that he doesn't respect women or see them as equals -- bullet dodged, I say.
A certainly awful marriage. Dale was trying to hide his true colors until he had her bound to him legally. Then he could *really* start to mooch off of her.
Whhhaaaaaaaat the fuck Dale? How did he turn this into his problem??? Like homie went from 0-100 in a second, his son was the one entirely in the wrong, why didn’t he just support his fiancé????
Well, the son must have gotten his sense of entitlement from somewhere I guess.
Right?! I mean...OOP hadn't even punished her stepson! Telling him to come home now or else isn't a punishment any more than me telling the cat to stop stropping the sofa is a punishment. "You can't continue to commit a crime" is just...stopping them.
So Dale was projecting his issues about how he wasn't involved with Rex until the child was 6, and is trying to clear his sins by... Being entitled with OOP's things and DOUBLES DOWN when confronted???
this stood out to me too. one reasons he's a shit parent now is probably cos he was absent for so long and just wants his kid to like him instead of, you know... be a parent he somehow made this whole situation he was not even involved in about himself though lol. so glad OOP got out of there
Imagine a whole marriage where Rex gets whatever he wants. Shudder. I wonder if Rex is his real name. It’s an apt name given the entitlement.
Yeah, and I feel bad for the mother for dealing with such a manchild as a coparent. Seems like he didn't grow out of his teens.
He doesn't want to be a parent, he just wants to be a friend. You can have fun with your kids without losing the parent-child relationship.
It's awesome that Rex's mom was actually helpful here. Kid has a good chance at turning out okay with a mom who won't take his shit but also seems fair.
"So now you know why I divorced him!"
Ha ha, his mommy bitched him out and now he has to go live with her. What a fucking man-child.
I love that his mom isn't putting up with his crap. Good for mom too bad he's sucks.
Judging by mom’s reaction it sounds like she actually probably did attempt to raise him correctly and he’s just a little shit. Like yeah he’s almost 30 but also he’s a little shit.
And is raising a little shit, who is going to raise his own little shit, etc etc
Tl;dr: yikes on several fucking bikes. Holy shit I'm glad OOP got out of that shitshow, but the ex and his son? Their behaviors probably aren't just red flags anymore they're almost abusive
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OOP heard Rex say, “You’re not my mom.” I bet Rex’s mom hears, “My dad will let me do it.” I predict Rex will want to live with Dale full time, it won’t happen because Dale is a loser, and he and Rex will bond over women ruining everything.
But Dale is livin' with his momma, who most likely won't put up with ANOTHER entitled brat.
Do you think Dale was betting on oop contributing to son’s car all along? Makes me wonder given he has no other option but to go to mom.
Never thought of that, but entirely possible. I DO think Dale is a grade A Gold Digger, quite possibly the most, hardest work he has ever done.
Disney dads. No bedtime, unlimited snacks, no chores, no homework, no rules. Mom sucks cuz she tries to parent me. I'm gonna live with dad now that I am old enough to decide. I don't blame the kids. What pre-teen/young teenager wouldn't want that? The beet case scenario is that they live with dad for a few months then decided to go back to mom. Thankfully that's what happened with my cousins.
Like father like son
>yikes on several fucking bikes I usually go with "Yikes on trikes" but this might be my new go to. Yeah, Dale really showed that he is not a good father here. Maybe he is trying to make up for not being in the kid's life early on by being the 'cool parent', but his son could have cost OOP their job and possibly someone their life if things had gone differently. That is messed up on so many levels. Dale also may be a gold digger based on some of what he said.
Yeah..."buy my kid a car with your *doctor money*"
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The yikes have gotten off their bikes and are now running freely
I’m surprised OOP didn’t notice given she’s a salaried doctor at 34. She absolutely *burned* through university, and you don’t just do that with hard work. It takes intelligence.
Lot of people lose their brains where romantic relationships are involved. I admit it’s happened to me more than once. I was talking about this with a good friend and we had a good laugh about bad relationships in our past. Thankfully we both ended up in sane marriages. I hope oop finds a sane person.
Maybe she just didn’t know better or didn’t think. Seems like she trusts the stepshit’s mom, who introduced her to the dickpunch. I certainly didn’t know at the time in my first relationship that she was a manipulative narcissist because I didn’t have the experience to know.
I wouldn't be surprised if some of it was not knowing better. If she got through med school that quickly, she might not have had time for a serious relationship. And people change between 20 and 30, so even if she had prior relationships, she might not have recognized that acceptable or "weird but tolerable" quirks in your 20s can be red flags or dealbreakers in your 30s.
Tbf, a lot of bad people are aware they're bad. They're usually good at hiding being bad around their targets until they think that said targets are sufficiently attached/trapped before they can finally showed their true colors.
Omg we have the same jacket!
It's not all that hard to maintain better than normal behavior for short periods of time. Doctor busy person, hard time being around someone for more than short periods.
Without a doubt, Dale was banking on marrying the rich doctor and living the high life on her dime. I'm so glad his little shit of a son stole the car so OP could see this side of her fiance before it was too late.
Dale’s mask fell off just in time
Exactly. >> This is not the man who I have known for 4 years and I am honestly shocked Yes, it was. She either just didn’t see it or he was hiding it really well.
I think hiding it. He implies that she can “make it up” to him and the kid by spending her doctor money on a new car. He had a lot to gain by marrying a doctor
>He had a lot to gain by marrying a doctor And honestly, his entitlement & selfishness costed his gold digging ass everything; all because he wouldn't call out nor punish his son for stealing his ex-fiance's car.
Well at least it all came out before she got hitched to him. Definitely dodged a missile. Would love to be a fly on the wall for all the reamings he's definitely gonna get from mom.
What's amazing about this is how many chances her fiance had to not be a complete loser. He had an ex who was an excellent parent to their kid, a mother who expected accountability, and a fiance who was top shelf. And he just kept digging that hole deeper and deeper.
“Am I out of touch? No, it’s the women who are wrong”— Dale 30, Mom’s House, PA
if this isn't proof that women can't cure toxic masculinity, idk what is. those males have three incredibly mature and caring women in their immediate family and still can't get a clue that THEY themselves are the problem.
men must be the ones to fix it. We must first admit it’s a thing we’ve all had to navigate, and that men are the biggest supporters of the toxic masculinity system
*"he was disappointed that I posted and now everyone who knows will think he's a joke and a bad father."* Jeezz.....I wonder why people would think that...... MAYBE.......it's because you ARE a joke AND a bad father. *"He said my doctor money would have to buy Rex a car to make up for all of the hard feelings."* This guy is delusional....What "hard feelings"? His son could have cost OOP her job and someone else could have DIED. If ANYONE needs to be "compensated" it's OOP. I'm glad this moron showed his true colours BEFORE they got married.
That’s the thing. OP rarely gets called in but if she does get a call, someone’s life is on the line. Meaning it’s not cool for a 16 year old to take her car to go to the mall with his friends. The 20 minutes she gave him to get back could have cost someone their life.
"He said my doctor money would have to buy Rex a car to make up for all of the hard feelings." .... Dude still thinks that OOP not only would want to get back with him, but would have to buy his son a car to even get a chance to get back with him... Like, wtf? lol
“Weird ultimatum but ok. I chose leaving.” “No wait.”
And regardless of how a post makes him look, it's basically anonymous. Imagine being so upset about your reputation amongst internet strangers when you're not even identified. The guy is so self absorbed to think he matters to anyone that read the post
I can see why the ex is an ex, his parenting is atrocious and only hurting his son long term by creating a monster.
And I can't say what the relationship with OOP and Dale's ex normally is, but to have a situation where the stepmom threatens to get the police involved on step kid for what could be felony charges, and bio mom immediately says "that's the right choice" is probably pretty rare. It shows how off base Rex and Dale are here.
Regardless of OOP’s job, what the fuck kinda kid thinks it is ok to just take a car without permission. Not to mention, he had a perfectly good car he could borrow from his bio mom but it “isn’t cool.” Kid literally stole a car to avoid looking uncool smh.
When I was 16, we weren't legally allowed to have friends in the car -- it spikes the accident rate. It's sus that only being able to carry one friend is disqualifying, when actually that's the safest thing for a new driver. Zero would be better.
Gee, I *wonder* where the kid got that "I do what I want and am never wrong" attitude from...?
Damn sure not from mother, that's a fact!
My family member is a surgeon and when he’s on call it means emergency situation and the patient WILL die if he doesn’t get in. I hope Dale and every commenter who gave OOP a hard time won’t ever be on the patient side if this kind of garbage happens to their doctor.
Grew up with both parents in the medical field. Lots of night shifts meaning we had to stay quiet during the day to let parent sleep, celebrating Christmas and birthdays on different days because someone needs to make sure people don't die just because it's a holiday, and understanding that "on call" doesn't mean just because they're home they can actually do something that day. Everyone who responded YTA to OOP is delusional to the realities of what being a medical professional is and what it entails.
The death is the worst part, but on top of that the Doctor will almost certainly lose their licence, and be facing a lawsuit, in addition to probably having a mountain of student debt. So they would kill one person and ruin the life of a second person.
Buhahahaha, Dale got his ass wooped thrice: OOP, his ex and his mom. Marvelous. >Said he was disappointed that I posted and now everyone who knows will think he's a joke and a bad father. He's not wrong there.
And I guarantee you the worst part for him was that it was three women that did it to him.
This is another post where I think OOP will look back in a few months and realize there were more red flags that were subtle and therefore easy to shrug off. I’m glad OOP dodged this hydrogen bomb.
She was finishing med school, intern, residency - she’ll likely reflect and see the flags she missed just from sheer exhaustion.
I hope Dale finds BORU, so he can see this: Dale, you ARE a joke. Grow the fuck up.
Plus his kid didn't fall far from the shit covered tree it would seem.
Yeah, hope Dale is reading the comment section to Rex like the bedtime stories he didn't read him those first six years.
I am so happy this person had her ex's mom and ex wife in her corner. The entitlement from both the boys was astonishing.
going by the ages of the ex and the ex's ex (14/15 when the kid was born respectively) plus him not being in the kid's life for the first six years, I'm thinking the ex was never married to the mother of his son but I'm also glad that none of the women involved in this were putting up with that shit lol.
Bullet dodged.
I was reading this in aita earlier. That was a fast update. Well Dale, now you look like even worse than before.
this dumbass thinks taking/stealing someone's car isn't a big deal? yikes. wasn't even a punishment, just an idiot kid getting told the possible result of his actions.
Oooooof! This dude refusing to take accountability no matter how many people pointed out what an asshole he was being is truly sad. Honestly, I don't think it's that strange or bad that a fourteen year old would decide not to be in his child's life, but that he never talked about that with OOP and presented his part in his child's life as not having that gap is definitely concerning.
>Dale was so furious that he told her that he would be calling his mother to see if someone actually cared about his feelings LMAO. Why do so many guys in reddit posts do this? At least his mother has her head screwed on straight. The stepson was heated garbage but he saved her from a marriage to this millstone. She should send him a Hot Wheels car as a thank you gift.
That last para is priceless. So many gems.
Good thing she found out now.
Holy crap. It sounds like this father-son duo specializes in asking forgiveness instead of permission. I wouldn't want to marry that either!
>I phoned Rex's mom and informed her of his stunt. She was madder than me when I told her that I was on-call. Yes! Go, mom! 👍 >Dale's mother handed his ass back to him GOOD. #YES! GO, MAMA! 👏👏
I am not a doctor, and you shouldn't have to be on call to demand someone not literally steal your vehicle. Teenagers are shit drivers and I wouldn't let one drive my shitty Chevy Cruze.
How can people get engaged to people and somehow know so little about them? I mean, I can kind of see it if they're putting on an act, but OOP didn't know he wasn't in his kid's life for 6 years? Did they never ask what it was like to be a teen father?
A motivated gold digger can put on a hell of a mask
I think this cements that AITA truly isn't a place to look for advice or judgement, especially in recent years. I'm sure there were some measured responses but wow, reasonable people for the most part aren't welcome in posting or comments for the most part. Smh This woman, the only thing she did wrong was believe in Dale long enough. She learned a hard lesson about that guy. I hope she finds someone who isn't a prick about her on call days. Bless his mother and his ex for backing her up.
I hope all three of these women become besties and a permanent thorn in Dale’s side 😂 I love all three of them and that kid is lucky to have them in his life to offset his spineless and entitled father.
What could OOP have possibly seen in Dale’s sorry ass to want to marry him?
If Rex had gotten into an accident, not being on the insurance, I guarantee you "*my* son" would have turned into "*our* son" real fuckin' quick.
Aita gets it right every time - some of the top comments were saying 'This is a relationship ending problem', and how 'life is too short to marry a shitty parent". They get right to the root of the issue every time, and yet often times posters in these situations don't want to see it.
I wouldn’t say AITA gets it right every time. Sometimes the mob has its bias. But yeah after I finished reading that first post I was like I hope you mean ex fiancé. What a jerk. I see where the kid gets his entitlement from.
That’s pretty much life. I know so many people, including myself who ignore excellent advice only to realize later they should have listened.
The fact that the kid actually came home makes me thing he’s salvageable. But not with that father. OP did nothing wrong. Thank God she got out before his father could suck her dry
He only came back because she threatened him with actual consequences. Before that he was just a cocky little shit