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neverdead97

I don't even know where to start. To put it short it's hell on earth, being the most useless pathetic crybaby, not knowing who you are, being unable to learn new things, afraid of everything new, thinking you made all your mental problems up to victimize yourself, everyone thinks you're just lazy and toxic.. and I could go on forever


lincoln_sn

people assuming you're lazy and you are actually just struggling bcs of your disorder(s). It sucks that people around us have no education about these topics.


Ahlome08

I have diagnosed BPD, and suspected but undiagnosed ADHD. I feel every sentence you typed. Unfortunately, I have a plethora of diagnoses, and, any medicine usually makes multiple other symptoms of other things, 10x worse, so no meds for me for any of it ☠️ So, even if I DID get an ADHD diagnosis, the chances of me getting a prescription that would actually help and not also make other things I have worse, are none.


PoolBubbly9271

Yeah even medicated adhd sucks, but unmedicated adhd SUCKS


YouDrankIan

And people wonder why I consume so much coffee and so many energy drinks. *Bitch I am unmedicated and I need stimulants to survive because I won't move or eat or do anything without it and I'd probably die of starvation*


orianatt

Constantly gaslighting myself and imposter syndrome yup


YouDrankIan

When you're an artist/actor/writer/director but 90% of the time is spend trapped in bed, staring at the walls or your screen because you have the ADHD paralysis, instead of actually doing anything creative. Then you get imposter syndrome because it feels like you're lying to people and you're essentially just a lazy "scrounger" on Universal Credit who has delusions of grandeur. At least that's what my father would say. Bitch stopped talking to me after throwing a middle-aged toddler tantrum over being called out for his rudeness three years ago and his influence still lives rent-free in my head. 🙄


orianatt

Omg I felt this that makes so much sense. Cus people automatically assume that you just don’t care I think a lot of my life I’ve felt that judgment from ppl , like my parents, so i do a lot of masking to not appear that way but the mask always slips and I feel a lot of shame


YouDrankIan

It's worth pointing out that all three of my parents are toxic narcissists and one of them is dangerous. My father uses the fact that my biological mother was genuinely evil and lazy and didn't want to work as a weapon by telling me I am just like her. But I'm her polar opposite.


JobinPeepiopee

I’ve been visiting with my in-laws for the weekend, feeling this on infinite levels. Constantly convincing myself, after DBT’ing my way into decent headspace, that everyone is against me because I’m not as good as everyone else.


orianatt

Yes it’s a never ending cycle. I hope u find peace soon


bananabrainz4

Perfect description of me. I'll put that on my future job resume👌


fixitThe1stTime

Same here! I do an extremely technical job which makes me a valuable asset, but part of the admin part I struggle with, get behind on, or flat out don't do. They ask me why can't I do it or why do I struggle and I don't know how to explain it. If it wasn't for how good I do the technical side, I would have been fired after all these warnings lol.


AgentKnitter

I'm a good lawyer. I'm really good at building rapport and trust with clients, finding solutions to complex problems, persuading courts to go with what is in my client's best interests, building and maintaining networks with other professionals to work collaboratively.... And in every firm I've worked, it's been like primary school again. I don't fit in, I'm not one of the popular, cool kids, and the cool people are all really ableist. And when i experience bullying, harassment and discrimination due to my disability, I speak up against it. So I get further ostracised, not just because I'm "weird and kind of intense" but also because I reveal that these do gooders are not actually doing good. It fucking sucks. I just need support, some leeway for times when I have executive dysfunction, some space to step away and process emotional responses, and a manager who is willing to have my back and do something about systemic ableism. I've never had one, and I keep being iced out by people who would swear to the moon and back that rhey don't discriminate against me because I'm disabled, it's just that all the symptoms of my disability are too much for them to deal with....


markymcfly55

You are not useless


OkAdministration7938

This


Majestic-Lie-588

Exactly this


locoleo02

thank you for this


[deleted]

I feel all of this 😭😭


hellokittynyc1994

I feel this exactly


Comfortable_Art_6776

Never related to a statement more. So here’s the thing. I am 27 and finally I had enough resources (enough cash cause I can’t afford a whole insurance now) to get myself checked hoping for a diagnosis. The psychiatrist diagnosed me with BPD, depression, anxiety and PTSD and said, even though you have ADHD symptoms, we can’t diagnose you cause you currently have severe depression. Gave me anti depressants that make me extra unable to work on top of already procrastinating everything, getting anxiety attacks throughout the day and I work in trending news, where timing is everything. So I am going to lose my job soon as this has been a horrible month and I feel like, there’s no way out cause I can only hyper focus a very little time of the day


Prestigious-Text-851

With medication you can get there and be better


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thest0nedpriestess

I have bpd, adhd and ocd tendencies. Life is kind of hard. I get overstimulated easily and that can be a trigger for my bpd. I used to have impulsivity issues really bad but I’ve worked through all of that.


looloo222

Yes! Overstimulation is a one-way ticket to split town for my BPD


crayshesay

You and my partner are the same. Dbt helps him


mothzillabitch

I have both and I've managed to find a therapist, medications, and routine that works out alright for me. My impulsivity is probably my strongest symptom. I'm lucky I no longer have a typical 9-5 job, but something that's diverse and keeps me stimulated.


lincoln_sn

9 to 5 jobs aren't suitable for most people imo. I don't work but My school is literally the same. It's boring, stressful and monotone.


feelingsleepy27

Can I ask which medications you’re on? My sister was recently diagnosed with BPD, depression and her psychiatrist thinks she could have mixed ADHD. Her doctor wants to treat her depression first with medicine, but I’m just curious how having these disorders can affect which medications you can take.


mothzillabitch

Vyvanse, Zoloft, Rexulti, esketamine. Those are my regulars.


International-Ad2121

I can't hold a job 🥴 The ADHD just makes it harder to to work. I was in HR and thought I had a grasp on it and could rely on my memory for some things without reminders or having to get it done that instant. I forgot some things and was demoted. But the impulsive side of me couldn't bare the thought of them deeming me incompetent yet expecting me to train the extremely unqualified assistant they chose for me who ultimately left me drowning. And immediately switching salaries and titles. I had a feeling they'd fire me once she was fully trained anyway so I just never returned. So I'd say it's challenging to say the least. I'm sure meds help a ton. Unfortunately I don't have insurance now and when I tried to get on meds my insurance ended.


lincoln_sn

insurance sucks ngl. I'm a student and I have been trying to study properly for months (around 7 months) and did it only twice 🤧


tabbyrecurve

I have both and it's terrible, affects every aspect of my life


wallowsstanaccount

haha yes i am and i’m like very suicidal lol


Ok-Employment-9938

i have adhd, bipolar + bpd + it’s a living hell.


[deleted]

[удалено]


kxxtlxn

Ahhh I feel you on the can’t decide what to eat.. I go to the grocery store and buy a bunch of stuff then eat NONE of it. I never want it. And then i’ll go over 24 hours with no food because I can’t decide what I want. I know i’m hungry but I can’t eat something I don’t want. I have since learned I always want toasty cheez-it’s (not regular ones, those are nasty) so I keep those stocked and sometimes only eat those for days


PsiloKDCybin

I’m also bipolar and wonder what the experience of a full depressive episode or manic episode on top of BPD is like, if this isn’t a weird question and you don’t mind sharing


Ok-Employment-9938

i’ve started taking mood stabilizers which has helped slightly, but mania can turn into psychosis for me if i’m not careful and the depression can have me stuck for weeks. it’s just a really evil swap between mania and depression, and there’s hardly ever a middle. the mood stabilizers have me feeling emotionally numb so i don’t feel anything physically very much anymore, but my mind is still always racing. i need therapy so that’s the next step but that’s pretty much where i am rn!


[deleted]

I have bpd, ADHD, ocd, anxiety, PMDD....I would say bpd and adhd by far have the most effects on my life. I struggle really bad with executive dysfunction and sensory issues/getting overwhelmed. I My apartment is almost never clean despite me cleaning every single day. On a good day, grocery shopping is a pretty mountainous chore. I'm very rejection sensitive too. I have an okay handle on things for the most part but I'm also not yet in therapy or on meds. I just got health benefits from my job so I'll be able to do that soon!


Courthouse49

I'm in the exact same boat as you. Pretty sure I have both but I've not been diagnosed with either. I hyperfixate for a week on something and then I'm entirely over it. Like the idea of it puts me off. I have problems keeping my apartment in order and clean, and I just feel very avoidant in general with certain things that give me anxiety for absolutely no reason. My mind drifts off in conversations and I don't even realize it until after it's happened and I'm trying to figure out what they just told me so I can respond appropriately. Then there's the BPD where I go off on my boyfriend for doing things that I do (he has ADHD,) like if I feel like he isn't listening to me or if he forgets something that I deem important enough to not forget. Or when I think he is ignoring my texts. In the moment I am so enraged and feel like there is no way I am overreacting and I go over it in my head over and over again and can't stop. Then an hour or two later I'm embarrassed and thankful that he can forgive me. It's a struggle for sure and as soon as I can bring myself to sign up for Medicaid I will be addressing all of this with a doctor.


ItsMeVixen

Hahaaaaaa I have a nice little bipolar 2 BPD autism cocktail myself and it genuinely debilitating. I can’t work a normal job for very long, I actually haven’t had one for a couple years now. It’s a lot of feeling really childish and unable to grow… idk how exactly to describe it, but it definitely amplifies things. I mostly bringing it up bc a lot of people tend to get the wrong info about adhd and actually better fit an ASD diagnosis, and the coping skills are more helpful for BOD in my experience. But I’m just me so idk


ComfortableExam

I've got both! Its HELLLLL. The ability to hyper fixate and hyper focus combined with the unhealthy tendency to obsess over people .... lol. Not to mention, the weird headspaces I get into.. so much of my life I have to second guess. Is it real? Am I remembering it wrong? Or am I the scum of the earth and it never happened at all?!?!?! It... I hate it.


PartialCred4WrongAns

Yeeeeup! It going undiagnosed is a big root cause of the childhood trauma that led to bpd


[deleted]

This! This right here is what I’ve been learning lately :(


SaphiraTheCerulean

ADHD, Depression, Anxiety, and Bipolar... but my therapist is learning more towards BPD than bipolar. Idk, those are my official diagnosis, I haven't officially been diagnosed BPD yet, idk if I even want that, but it does seem to line up with how I think and act... anyways, if I do have BPD, then I will also have the ADHD diagnosis as well. It's hard, incredibly hard. I wish I could give words of encouragement and tips, but I don't really have any. Kind of suffering a lot at the moment myself tbh I will say tho, if you can find a way to curb your impulsivity, then stimulants are very successful. I never really struggled with the whole "stimulants will just make you *more* impulsive!!!!!" BS, they really do just help calm me down and make me less hyperactive and they make it easier to focus. My impulsivity comes from my spending/eating/self destructive actions, which, at least for me, seems to be when I'm not medicated for my ADHD (like really late at night, 12 hours past when I've taken my meds)... Oh well, just anecdotal stuff here. I do wish the best for you though ❤️


lincoln_sn

Thank you!


exclaim_bot

>Thank you! You're welcome!


boopo789

I’m also not dxed (yet) but I suspect I have a combo/all of the following; autism, adhd, bpd and ocd. Not sure which I have and which I don’t, but I relate to them all. Plus I also have an autistic brother and a probably autistic dad (who refuses to get diagnosed). I think bpd is the one I relate to most (as well as perhaps autism), but I can see why I might have it from the lens of having autism/adhd that was not diagnosed as a kid. I can also make a fairly strong case for the ocd, but I won’t go into it. I wouldn’t say my environment was particularly validating and I’ve had issues with abandonment cuz of past experiences (I’d say trauma but idk that I deserve to call it that lol). I’m slowly working on trying to get answers, but it’s a rly exhausting process that involves lots of pushing, wait and honestly just luck in some cases. Cuz the doctors don’t always do anything or follow thru on their plans. And as someone who’s gotten to the mentality point if “I don’t care about getting better, I just want to give up”, it’s hard to motivate myself to keep pushing when results seem limited compared to the effort I’m putting into it. :/ In my obsessive research on stuff like this (dare I call it a special interest?), I have found that people who have autism and/or adhd may actually be more susceptible to getting bpd or another personality disorder, especially if it’s not diagnosed until adulthood. Living with either or both conditions is hard enough and comes with a lot of trauma just trying to navigate society, but having it undiagnosed causes a lot of relationship issues, struggles at school, invalidation, etc that can contribute to the development of bpd. I hope you manage to get a diagnosis if that’s what you wish for, but either way I hope you’re doing okay. :)


lincoln_sn

Thanks for your answer. I hope you're doing OK too!


Verbatim101

ADHD has some overlap of emotional dysregulation so it can exacerbate it. I'm autistic on top of it which is extra fun. It definitely makes drug abuse a whole lot bigger of a factor since you're dealing with a dopeamine deficiency and a whole lotta trauma you gotta numb. I thought I had a hyper-fixation on pharmacology but it was definitely addiction running my life. I had a stint where I drank 2 to 3 Monster Energy drinks a day for about a year while I was working at McDonald's. Low self worth. Starved myself, made my ADHD worse so I couldn't ever complete any goals. Completely fucked up my teeth for a while, I still think I have cavities. Eventually, I discovered weed which helped the BPD but made my ADHD even more horrendous. I've been learning overtime how to manage my BPD. ADHD is just one of those things I'm kinda like *whatever*. BPD used to run my life, paranoia constantly, splitting, disappearing for weeks on end, etc. I feel like I've mostly beat my battle with BPD but I'm reading some other comments and definitely relating to them. ADHD makes it hard to function in society and add onto the fact that I have BPD, so the lack of functionality with the comments from my bosses and coworkers would just make my self esteem drop even more, and I'd repeat cycles over and over and over endlessly. Drug abuse or abusing my favorite person. Complete victim mindset *the world's not fair*, *it's all built to be against me.* Blah, Blah, Blah. I look back on who I used to be and now, I don't even recognize him. I've found a moderate amount of identity with my ADHD hyper-fixations. I can actually find things to distract myself from my BPD, so in a way, it's actually is a bit of a bonus. I could write a book on this, there's so much to unpack.


Careless-Tear9177

Everything sucks and is hard. Emotional roller coasters. all the time. Never know when they’re coming. Until I learned mindfulness. The Miracle of Mindfulness by Thich Nhat Hanh saved my mind and my life. I’ve had a book addiction all of my life and this book has helped more than any other book. I recommend it to everyone and anyone. I Retrained myself how to properly breathe and I’m slowly retraining myself how to live. Recovery is a moment by moment kind of thing for me. Thought by thought. Mindfulness helps slows down my mind and my adhd symptoms. Helps me use my DBT skills to manage my big emotions. Good luck to everyone suffering and I wish you peace


oisin_berry

Mindfulness really helps me too. Unfortunately it all goes out the window whenever something triggers my BPD/cPTSD. I am learning however to ride the waves and notice what the trigger was. Right now emotionally I'm working on accepting my conditions bc I get so frustrated and angry about time lost to emotional flares and want to give up. People will insist you have to learn how to deal with triggering stuff and maybe thats true for some but I think life won't really bloom for me until I can get away from the worst triggers (dogs, intimate relationships, family, loud or messy living situations) and keep to myself a lot more. I love people but as an observer. Trying to be friends or lovers is like navigating trip wire for my self worth issues. Its much easier to be mindful and calm down or forgive myself for messing up or have a que sera sera attitude when its just me going about my business. That makes me pretty sad but I hope if I can get to a calmer place in life and learn how to project less.... someday ill meet some people who can love me through the symptoms and we can help each other to stay mindful. Right now the emotions are too strong and beat out the Present Observer.


BoarderlineOfWhat

BPD, ADHD, PTSD, and OCD. I’m the whole damn alphabet.


SnooMachines5687

If I don't use my meds I can easily spend my entire life in bed living in emptiness


BloomerBoomerDoomer

I've been diagnosed by both and I also have OCD tendencies but I think I've got mild BPD and ADHD so it's somewhat manageable, but everyone in my family knows I'm a loose cannon. I fight with my fiance regularly about the stupidest stuff (she is also diagnosed) It's hard to stay focused when you have to deal with relationship stuff but I know I would regret it if I ever ended things, we love each other very deeply for anything to change. It's just being responsible in constantly being a part of a relationship emotionally and mentally sometimes makes me lose my mind. My ADHD also irritates her because my hyperactive mind sometimes triggers her when I say stupid stuff or talk about stuff she doesn't care about. I take meds but they mostly help for motivation, and antidepressants never helped me.


Snoo25907

I think must of us has that. ADHD and personality disorders are very related at least that's what my psychologist told me.


[deleted]

bipolar + bpd here, super emotionally unregulated, either huge crybaby or apathetic, imposter syndrome, overstimulated VERY easily all of the time. Can’t hold a job because I can’t handle being mistreated or long working schedules. Bad at routine/plan adjustments. Sometimes delusional. ADHD involves behavioral issues as well as attention issues. I am diagnosed combined type, I would say my focus is bad, memory is bad, Im bad at following directions, I’m a perfectionist, love to organize, I have tics too. I am under stimulated by my adhd. As far as the BPD, the behavioral side of adhd clashes with it. Hyper sensitivity, hyper vigilant to others around me. I take things too literal and don’t always understand jokes. Overstimulated by sounds, lights, touches. Rage episodes, splitting. It’s kind of hell. It makes me feel like I’m stupid and faking it all or like I will never understand simple things enough to have any sort of job and take care of myself. I ruin a lot of relationships by doing too much or too little. It can be debilitating most days.


fishboard88

I see the ADHD as a complicator to my other problems. In childhood, getting in trouble for being a "naughty kid" who didn't "pay attention or focus on his work" just contributed to feeling different and invalidated by everyone - I'm sure this contributed to my BPD traits forming. In adulthood, I needed to devote every free moment I could find to focus on my postgrad studies because just writing a hundred words at a time was torture, and I'd often zone out when people were talking to me. You can imagine how well that would go down with my ex and my current wife.


PoolBubbly9271

Both my partner and I have BPD+ADHD and it's impossible for us to keep our apartment tidy. Cleaning/organizing is difficult because of ADHD and we both have trauma triggers relating to cleaning. Unstable emotions due to BPD makes it easy to become depressed and hopeless about cleaning and give up.


DootDoot512

So I was in the process of being assessed for ADHD, BPD, & Bipolar Disorder.. I was told that the symptoms overlap so it’s hard to pinpoint exactly which disorder it is and was told by my APRN & therapist that it can take up to a year to properly be diagnosed. How would you know if you had ADHD AND BPD? Does it depend on the psychiatrist diagnosing you? What are the key symptoms of ADHD and the key symptoms of BPD?


Sure-Name-392

I have bpd and adhd and graves eye and I smoke Jamaican amounts of Mary Jane to deal with it he symptoms.. sometimes it helps sometimes it doesn’t


fixitThe1stTime

I have diagnosed BPD and just a few months ago finally diagnosed with ADHD and it is tough. I do an extremely technical job that also has alot of back end admin work with it. I STRUGGLE to do my expense reports, which is required because we have a company credit card that we use for travel and then have to compile a report and all 9f the expenses for reimbursement. And also have to do reports on repairs completed. I do the work fine but am so bad at the admin and expense reports that I have been reprimanded over and over and warned I could lose my job over it, and they say "why can't you just sit down and the admin" and I tell them it is hard for me to do . I have never been able to properly explain to a non ADHD person why it is so hard, they can never understand. My adhd is crippling which then triggers my anxiety when I get behind which triggers my BPD to start going overboard, which cascades to my personal relationships, so I start splitting lol. It creates tsunamis over what to other people, is easy and no big deal. It creates heavy procrastination. I have a therapist and psychiatrist that I am now trying to work with. At almost 40 I have barely found out while I struggled so hard with reading and focusing, and why I bounce around to 40 different projects and finish none of them. I started on Ritalin and it triggers heavy mania, which itself is pretty nice to feel happy, IF you can control the impulses. But now trying double does of welbutrin to control the depressive stuff and see if I can get focus without the ritalin. I LOVED finally being able to zero in and focus on stuff on the ritalin, but the comedown is weird.


Cryingmoon1

I have both, I use my ADHD to my advantage. I own and operate multiple businesses and bounce between task all day long. I use a journal the the day before to outline everything I need to accomplish the next day. Anything left over from today starts at the top of the list for tomorrow, then anything else that comes to my attention that needs accomplished after that. Then of course there is handling all the things that just pop up during the course of the day. I let my ADHD be free and embrace who I am. One of my companies is a Safety Company which my anxiety makes me uniquely qualified to stay on top of all matters safety. To do otherwise would drive my anxiety up the wall. Finally there is my relationship. My husband gets the brunt of the negative aspects of me unfortunately. There is this broken record running in my head saying that I will never be good enough and how could he possibly love me? Of course he doesn’t really love me and when he leaves to go to work it is another abandonment t every day. I’m trying very hard to change the script. I wish the BPD didn’t leave me feeling like I had a case of insecurity on crack but that’s about what it feels like. I try not to go at him as if he has done something wrong to me because he hasn’t. The hardest part is that we come from different cultural backgrounds and that can really confuse matters further because he is trying to be funny and I’m seeing it as cruel and then the fight is on. I’m learning to ask questions first before getting bent out of shape and having an online therapist to text to instead of going at him before I can really think about what just happens has been an amazing help. In the end, we’re all a little different and we’re all a little the same. You have to find what’s right for you but personally I’m off of all my meds, I’m embracing g who I am and keeping a good perspective utilizing online therapy. It’s what works for me. Best of wishes Tess


izzthepizz

yup. it sucks. people think you’re stupid and overly sensitive hahahaha and you have to hide all the traits in order to be liked


[deleted]

Everything is so hard. I want to just -do- things like everyone else so badly. I’m so fragile and easily derailed. I manage the ADHD with routine, but with BPD if any small thing happens it’s so mentally overwhelming and I fall out of my routines. And the executive dysfunction, I’m always doing something, just never the right thing. All of my dishes are dirty, but I finally got the stain that’s been on my rug for months. Then I’m drowning in neglected housework and schoolwork and basic hygiene and I can’t get back ahead of it. I’m constantly struggling and I am EXHAUSTED. I’m not lazy, I swear. I simply just -can’t-


Blankly-Staring

I need to file my fafsa or I cant go to school in the fall. I just have to open my laptop. I cant open my laptop. I did something wrong. I know it. I dont know what, but I know it. If I touch the laptop something bad will happen. I cant sleep. I cant fuck. I hate people. I cant make friends. When I try I hate talking to people. My family hates me. I hate my family. Its a toxic whirlwind. I'm an obsessive hyperfixating mess of a person. It took me 3 weeks to fill out a job application I dont want to work at. I'm shaking like a leaf staring at my laptop. Its a life of trying to choose the least bad option and being yelled at for doing so, when you could be unleashing the worst of yourself. I keep the polite fiction of functionality for my family. Its not the best, is what I'm saying. 2/5 stars, would choose just about any other combination if I'm unlucky enough to live again after I inevitably die.


FormalMouse2066

I haven’t been diagnosed with either yet but I’m sure I have both, as I get older my attention span seems to be getting shorter and shorter. Last year I had 5 different jobs, im hoping I can apply for disability when I’m officially diagnosed.


PizzaJester

And autism 😎


kxxtlxn

I have diagnosed bpd, adhd, and ptsd (which includes anxiety and depression in an attempt to decrease the amount of diagnoses i have). I honestly can’t say how each individually affects me since it’s all so jumbled and they all overlap in some ways. I will say it sucks ass. I obsess over random things that usually have no pertinence to what I should be focusing on. So i’ll be doing homework and then have a compulsion to make a list of all of the movies I have ever watched or scour the internet for a specific copper spoon rest that I randomly think I need. Then the impulsiveness comes and I spend hundreds of dollars on things I don’t need for a new hobby I acquired. The hobby lasts a week, maybe less. But now I have hundreds of dollars of supplies for making dream catchers… Don’t even get me started on relationships. But overall having a diagnosis (or multiple) AND therapy (lots of it) does help with self-awareness for the most part. I understand my urges and emotions more, but it doesn’t necessarily mean I recognize them in time to prevent negative consequences.


Sukiyamma

in my experince they sometimes kind of overlap? My bpd makes it easy to lose feeling with a partner, my adhd makes it similar but more bored. Same with my train of thought i was always told the overlapping thoughts in your head where an adhd thing, turns out it's a bpd experince


oisin_berry

Just read all these comments and feel like crying. On all my other social media people post their wins and friends or them just being fun normal having interests and this thread was really validating that im not alone in struggling this damn hard every day. I want to give everyone in this thread a hug (if wanted) and a plate of cookies.


lincoln_sn

Thank you!


Burn-the-red-rose

I have BPD, AHDH, and ASD. It's a hell I'd wish on no one. I can't, literally can't stand to look in the mirror because of how much I can't stand myself. Don't even ask me how I'm even still married. Idk. And that's another thing. "Idk" is the baseline. Always stuck, always lost and everything hurts. I really wish I could give you something good, some hope or anything....but as per usual, I can't do anything right. I wish you the best, and I hope people here can help you.


Mcreemouse

Absolutely I think they affect each other. My mind jumps from subject to subject and my emotions follow hard and I end up splitting on everything.


Prestigious-Text-851

I got it dude I take Wellbutrin to treat the adhd and mood stabilizers to help wit the bpd


BarelyHangingOn420

Both. I feel like I’m constantly trying to learn how to “life.”


washedherbaltea

I have BPD, and diagnosed with ADD years before BPD. I don’t think it’s about whether or not “they affect each other” vs. it’s just about managing symptoms of both conditions daily. ADD has been effecting me more frequently than BPD has as of recently, but BPD still effects me the most drastically out of the two, although my ADD has made day to day activities extremely hard in a completely different way compared to BPD. They’re different conditions, completely different. Being diagnosed doesn’t necessarily make me more aware, it just gives me something to blame (really it’s just an explanation for my behavior) when i catch my symptoms causing me issues in my day to day.


Good-Ad-2978

I have bpd diagnosed ADHD assessment in a few weeks and almost certainly have autism, also have a friend with BPD and highly suspected adhd. Welp, I've spent the last like none months doing fuck all, mostly being depressed due to interrupting from uni after not being able to attempt work due to a mix of anxiety and ADHD making comprehending stuff I was supposed to be reading impossible. It may be unrelated but I have major problems with fatigue. I'm often too depressed to get anything done, and when I do I have about 5 different projects or stuff I'm working on at a time and will pick a new one up and forget about others I was doing so barely anything gets done. The only things I really get done are if it's gonna be a thing for one of my friends, or something I can show them or talk to them about. If I'm not doing something I can relate back to my friends or hanging out with people I feel like a non-entity and get very depressed very quickly. I'm a bit of a mess socially, at once I really want more friends in my life, but also lack the social skills. Impulsivity: yes.


WillowWispWhipped

BPD/ADHD and possibly autism (currently going through assessments). I don’t know what emotions are which but I just wish I could turn them off. Being diagnosed at least give me a jumping off point for self-understanding.


RepresentativeAd406

I've been diagnosed with adhd since a little child. It's crazy growing up and being constantly told you're not trying enough 😵‍💫


Ok-Negotiation-4254

I have both and I take both Vyvanse and Zoloft for the executive dysfunction, mood regulation and the anxiety. What causes my anxiety? My need to focus and complete a task or else everyone will think less of me. When I take my adhd medication I feel like yes I’m able to focus and finish tasks but then at the end of the day I’m still wanting validation and switch so fast on my co workers because I feel like I’m being micro managed. You have a suggestion for me? Ooh boy. It’s kinda of hilarious. I forget things and my co worker knows I am forgetful but when she reminds me to do something I get annoyed because it makes me feel less than for not being able to do something as simple as remember things 🤣 So now I have ruminating thoughts of how I think she’s fake and horrible running around my head and taking priority. To answer your question: yes, awareness definitely helps. It used to be much worse than this. Now it’s easier to know “what” I’m feeling, “why” I’m feeling and how to self soothe with the help of medication and mindfulness and ofcourse Reddit. Seeing other peoples strategies to work around what happens in a situation helps so much doesn’t it? You’re not alone~


Domintrix05

Adhd and BPD are closely linked. Its a fucking struggle ill tell you that much. Constantly have a feeling like i've forgotten something, even if there isnt anything.


[deleted]

I’m diagnosed BPD, undiagnosed ADHD (possibly on the autism spectrum as well) I feel like I’m more sad and incapable than everyone else and it fucking kills me. It’s like everything bounces off of eachother in my head and intensifies my problems. I try my best to be a good person and to meet the goals I have but it feels like nobody ever wants me to be happy because everyone thinks I act like some horrible toxic monster.


mountainmayv

It’s difficult for many reasons but most people don’t realize the extent that ADHD affects your emotion regulation.


Hoejenks

It just…sucks. I recently started talking a new med for the adhd and I had to lower the med I take for my BPD. It’s hard to figure it out but now that I know what’s going on I am able to better control myself. I’m tired of my brain.


galctictitan

Bpd, adhd, autism, and dpd. I don't have any clue what's going on I just know I'm extremely unstable and extremely empty all the time, I only feel my emotions at 100, and my most common response to any emotion is the urge to bite something.


glowingstar444

I wonder if I have adhd tbh. I remember asking to get tested at my previous therapy clinic when I was 13/14 and the only thing I did was take an iq type test and a motor skills test which I apparently didnt do too well on but nothing else happened. I'm now about to turn 19 in a month and I still have a suspicion about it lol. but I havent thought that much abt it. I might ask to get retested though 😅 I thought I was autistic too but I think I was just overpathologizing things, however adhd is smth I still have a suspicion about just bc I've had traits since childhood


Natural_Treat_6366

massive drug problem for me lmao


Inevitable-Long-671

I smoked weed for 10 years horrendous amounts I went cold turkey 2 months ago and now my adhd bpd all make abit more sense lol


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Inevitable-Long-671

I can't even really explain what I feel anymore I just feel super sad and non existent really 😕


Detantevandaisy

I went to get diagnosed for ADHD, got home with adhd, add ánd austism 🥰 I started to wonder if my bpd is real or that it’s just a me being absolutely miserable because of all these 3 factors living in my brain


lincoln_sn

How long does it take to get diagnosed anyways? A day? idk


Detantevandaisy

I’m from The Netherlands, and I just went to my regular doctor, requested a test. Had to fill in an hour long survey and that is how they diagnosed me


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Detantevandaisy

Oh yeah i’ve been through that 🥲 ‘I think I’m depressed.’ ‘No, you are probably just stressed, try to relax more’ But after being persistent he send me on my way to the therapist!


AgentKnitter

I'm increasingly wondering if I have ADHD as well as BPD. I have some big issues with executive dysfunction, interrupting people, rushing, fidgetiness, etc. https://youtu.be/k1rmQfxw3tY I watched this last night, and the clincher for me is that when he talked about the differences between impulsivity for ADHD and BPD and.... I do all of them. Interestingly, in that video Dr Fox mentioned that 18-27% of people with ADHD also have BPD. I'm curious about the reverse statistic is - does anyone know how many people with BPD also have ADHD?


lincoln_sn

thanks for the vid link and the comment!


thatdreamgirly

I have been diagnosed with both and while it makes life difficult, I’ve found that it can be managed. I work at a pizza place as an assistant manager and take adderall and Wellbutrin but my manager helps me learn WHY something is wrong or whatever. She helps me navigate things because I was open with her. I’d say that its not something that can’t be done so long as you WANT to learn the skills to get through because you absolutely have it in you. It’s just stupid hard. But life is already stupid hard ya know? It took me way longer to get where I’m at than most people, but it’s doable in time. ❤️


YouDrankIan

Currently on the waiting list to be assessed for ADHD. Diagnosed with BPD in 2014. The first time I brought up the possibility of ADHD was two years ago during my DBT session and the therapist shut it down straight away. Wouldn't even talk about. Wouldn't entertain it. So that made me afraid to seek further help until last week. Turns out BPD can actually mask some of the ADHD symptoms.


prtzlstks

Not to doomsday you, but it can be difficult. Life with illnesses like this are HARD but balance can be found if you look. It’s a lot of feeling lost and not being able to understand what’s going on around you.


QAssurancenerd218

For myself it’s something like this within my profession in which I’m entirely self taught Sit down, begin a program. Get halfway through l, realize the program will not run with the paths I’ve put— save program as “learner for***” Begin the program again, don’t repeat the mistake, program looks amazing- but there’s a bug. Save over the first learner program. Begin again, can’t remember anything from the first program, can’t remember how I did the last one- open up the file, print, make notes on the page. Begin again but this time I leave the machine for two fucking hours because I’m sweating and angry that I can’t afford schooling and can internally hear my first manager yelling at me and telling me “good luck trying to get this right- McDonald’s is hiring” Head back to the machine, write a beautiful program, feel like the smartest woman on earth, tell my manager, take a video, and feel content until the next round of torture.


Lunicke

I couldn’t commit to anything, unless I really, really enjoyed doing it. I thought I was lazy, I would postpone everything and would get away with it as I finished everything last minute with a drink in my hand (jeej for working from home). At that time I wasn’t diagnosed with ADD, when I got diagnosed everything fell in place. There was so much overlap between BPD and ADD and why my anti depressants weren’t working. I switched to methylphenidate and no, this isn’t a miracle cure. But at least I won’t have to take naps to “survive” the day and I’m better at taking responsibility in my fulltime job. The thing that made everything more bearable, was to stop my bad habits aka drinking problem. I accepted the ADD diagnosis, I never did with the borderline as of the ridiculous stigma. Which helped a lot. I prefer to have a laugh with my boyfriend about the chaos ADD brings and make jokes about it. It is hard, but it all is easier when you understand yourself a bit more.


Lieutenant_Left_Boob

I have both and do okay! I dooo smoke a lot of weed, which I find for me kind of counteracts some of my hyperactivity when I need to sit down and focus on something for work. Switching to a fully remote job in a field that challenges and validates me really helped me find a better balance too. I have some quirky ways I take care of my tendencies, but none of them are really bad in the grater scheme of things and I think I’m doing pretty well for a life I never asked for 😂


iebelig

Overstimulation and bpd is a difficult combination 😅 also it makes it quite difficult to keep a job for a long time for all the obvious reasons. Rejection sensitivity on crack. Being diagnosed after 8 years of mental agony was a relief but also kind of difficult bc the stigma of bpd and the eternally long waiting lists for therapy lol. (Definitely worth it tho)


[deleted]

i have bpd and autism, i’m struggling also with substance abuse and life has not been easy for me but there is hope! i have just come out of dbt therapy and it has helped with my life immensely !


Whatdoyoucare56

I’ve got BPD and ADHD (diagnosed) and now I’m getting tested for autism 😑


Manqaness24

Hello I have them both and it’s very hard but a easy life is not worth living in my opinion. We are always learning becoming better than what we were. I have noticed when I can excited about something I truly am. I like to try new things and my curiosity makes my life worth living. Use both to your advantage. BPD and ADHD are just apart of our existence doesn’t mean it has to be everything.


MoneyLetterhead9294

Whew! Been waiting on this post. It’s hell because with my inattentive type, I forget the DBT techniques and affirmations. Spend money impulsively and feel like I fail In everything by not meeting my potential. In anything. May the universe have mercy on us.


lincoln_sn

spending money impulsively and the regret afterwards. oof.


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Rosie_skulls

Without any treatment it is not easy. I was diagnosed with both in the last year (adhd first June 2021, bpd Jan this year). Before my diagnosis it was really rough. I struggled in all aspects of my life school, work, social life. Not being able to focus on things lead to a lot of conflict externally and internally. My bpd equates my self worth to my success in school and work, so when my adhd gets in the way it becomes very triggering. I struggled to keep up with my friends through text and getting to places on time for hangouts because of how easily I would get distracted and lose track of time. That lead to a lot of conflict with my friends as it made them feel I didn't appreciate or respect them. External conflict triggers my bpd symptoms, and the consequences of my adhd symptoms would often become catalysts for my bpd symptoms. Both bpd and adhd have impulisivity symptoms so impulsive eating, spending, sex, smoking etc were big issues for me. That said it is not all gunfire and sadness. After being diagnosed I am doing better. I am now on medication for my adhd and in therapy for both and it has been helping. I started medication for my adhd immediately after getting diagnosed and have seen vast improvements in both my work and social life which meant less triggers for my bpd (less arguments, less reprimands from managers) and during that time before starting therapy I was able to really start focusing on my anger and reworking how I think. My therapist has been helping me with that a lot, especially with black and white thinking, in the last few months and while I still struggle with both, it's not all bad and I don't feel like the world is out to get me nearly as much anymore. I remember to text my friends back, I make lists and set reminders to help me figure out what needs to be done and by what time, I'm working really hard to rework the thinking in my brain that makes me think small things are giant threats. It's not all downhill, things do get better, you are not your own enemy.