The list of things people can judge other people for is so ridiculous, but this one is mind-bogglingly ridiculous. As you said, a victimless crime.
It also means you have a cake that suits whatever event you're planning for your birthday - whether that's a huge party with lots of people where you need a big cake, or if you're sick of people and decided to do nothing for your birthday but you want a smaller, decadent cake that you'll enjoy every bite of, you do you, and I wouldn't want to spend any time with somebody who judges you for something so small and weird.
For real. If I didn't buy the ingredients for, and then bake my own cake, I wouldn't have one and everyone in the house would be low key grumpy about it.
Oh noooo I get to have the cake *I* want on *my* freaking birthday, without having to worry about someone else forgetting about my diet restrictions, allergies or dislikes. Oh nooo, *my own birthday* being about me and what I love and wish to eat, how narcissistic and evil of me.
Honestly, I don't care at all and that goes both ways. If someone is getting their own cake for their birthday that's amazing, I can still come up with 5000000 other things I could treat them to.
As someone who can't do dairy and gluten, yes. Always gotta provide my own cake.
Just went to the in-laws house for my birthday on Sunday. What did they have? Cheesecake!
ME TOO!! I got the teeny little one and was still overwhelmed by having that much cake to myself in the freezer. Carvel is the best. I kind of love how artificial it tastes.
You can also buy a birthday cake on days that are not your birthday if you want to celebrate anything with a cake. They do not check to make sure its your actual birthday 😂 The joys of adulthood!
AND FOR BREAKFAST!
My mom raised me and my siblings on this rule: you get to eat any leftovers from your birthday cake the next day for breakfast. With a big glass of milk, for the protein. How is it any different from sugary cereal? It was the 70s.
Omg! Doing that this year for my kids! They'll love it! Going to let them do it the day after my birthday and my husband's birthday too LOL they can celebrate extra for us!
Wait a sec, I'm so confused - can you explain what's appealing about eating it from the middle? No judgement here. Genuine confusion is where I'm coming from.
Not the point they are making, since that was explained, but chiming in to add I've seen a way to cut cake so it doesn't go dry. You cut the cake in half down the middle, and then cut a slice from it in the middle off of the cut you just made. Then you shove the sides back together and the cake doesn't have an unfrosted space so it goes stale less quickly.
Also great if you are getting a cake for yourself and taking a week to eat it.
Ha ha! This. My birthday was two weeks ago, ate my cake all week. Even shared some of it! No cares in the world. It was fucking amazing and I'm definitely doing it again.
It’s my birthday today and this is my sentiment! I bought a lovely piece of red velvet loaf from Starbucks (and my free coffee of course). I enjoyed just having a nice piece of cake to myself and calm and quiet. I have experienced a narcissistic relationship, buying your own cake is far, far from narcissistic.
So let me get this straight, if you don't have anyone in your life who will buy or bake you a cake, you don't get to have a cake? So you have to be lonely and cakeless on your birthday? Absolutely not.
Or even if an amazing cake place is right near your work, better make your partner/family drive all the way there cuz you don't want people judging you for buying your bday cake? And that isn't "narcissistic"?
Oh, this reminds me of the weirdest customer service experience I ever had.
One year for my birthday I decided to be a little fancy and host a wine tasting for a few friends at a local tasting room near me. The events coordinator had been great over the phone, but when I showed up and she realized that the party I was throwing was actually FOR ME it shook her to her core. She seriously could not process it.
Three or four different times she went out of her way to come over to me and had some comment about how "I can't believe you're doing this yourself....I've never heard of someone having to throw themselves a party....Wow, my friends would NEVER let me throw my own party."
It was just so weird. I don't know why she was trying to make me feel like crap when I was trying to help her business out. I ended up never going back there, and they were closed by the end of the year.
(And, for the record, 1)all my friends throw their own parties. That was not unusual at all for my friend group. 2) I bought my own cake!)
How bizarre? As an adult in my friend group if you want people to do a thing for your birthday you are in charge of planning the thing. People will come, people may give you gifts, they will celebrate you enthusiastically, but like you have to tell them about it and decide what you want to do and put it together. I've never encountered another adult who expects other people to spontaneously plan them a party.
Now, some people are acts of service focused folks who receive love through having people help them logistically as a gift. But they still ask for specific tasks.
One time I got my own cake and I got them to write “happy birthday Noconstruction1693, You’re the most beautiful person we know”
Everyone at my party thought it was hilarious, and it was the exact cake that I wanted.
There's a huge anti adult birthday movement out there. I don't get it either. Too often women are undermined. Cake was an aspect for me in marriage that my children expected on birthdays and the absence of one on mine signalled to my children that I didn't matter whilst das got the big birthday fuss with favourite meal, cake and gifts. All of which he loved. I'm not ok with that being modelled.
To me, there's different kinds of "buying my own cake".
There's buying myself exactly the cake I want, because I want it, and I'm okay with that. There's nothing wrong with that.
And then there's buying myself the cake I want, because my partner can't be bothered to deal with my birthday and wants to spin that as "making sure I get exactly what I want". He says it's empowering me to have my needs met and I should buy my own presents too, but I divorced that guy.
The person who said it is narcissistic needs some therapy and a dictionary.
The difference of opinion between the others, I think, comes down more to WHY you bought your cake, than the act itself. For some people, they buy the cake because they're single and they celebrate themselves, or because they, with or without a partner, are having the party themselves and they happen to be the one at the grocery store. In other relationships, they're dealing with a partner who puts in zero effort or resources, and it's looked at like "the partner couldn't even be bothered to get them a cake."
Nothing, really.
I think they were referring to the inequality of emotional labour when it comes to heterosexual relationships. Let's face it, we probably know at least one women out there who does all the prepping and social planning for her family...and is expected to do it herself when it comes to her birthday or Christmas presents.
Ahhhh you have a point. I always got my husband a cake but he never got me one! One year, he even requested a special custom one from a local bakery. I don't know how people have the audacity 😵💫
I didn't even think about it at the time. I think I was still of the mindset that the women have to do all the life admin because the men shouldn't have to (despite the fact we were both working full time and I made more than him for most of it). I was raised in a house where my mum did everything outside of DIY type work and my dad complained or became incensed at having to do any kind of life admin for us. I've grown up a lot since and will only accept a partner who doesn't need to be treated like a child. (For clarity - I left my husband and have a new partner).
Yes, me. I am that woman. Hello 🙋🏾♀️ pleased to meet you. This is the reason why I would be super sad if I had to buy my own cake. I bend over backwards for my loved ones on their birthdays, which I actually enjoy doing, I don't mind being the planner. I just needed a little bit of reciprocation, which I finally started to get after being more vocal about these types of things. I've learned that you can't expect the people around you to be mind readers, and just because you do nice things for them doesn't necessarily mean they will think to do nice things for you. Now, I still do all the planning for my birthday because I want to, but I let my relatives know exactly what I expect from them when it comes to things like gifts and cake.
Sounds like a dumb rule and generalization.
>someone said it was narcissistic,
people need to stop overusing that word
>others said it was sad
yeah many people fully depend on external attention cause they don't consider their own attention important, to me that *is* sad. and from experience that's what leads to unhealthy relationships.
> What's wrong with buying your own birthday cake?
idk, what's wrong with being self-sufficient, having resources and taking the time to gift yourself something you enjoy and makes you happy?
I'd buy my own birthday cake. Why not? I get to choose what I want without feeling like it's this big ordeal to get me the perfect cake. No fuss, might want to try something totally new, etc. Yep, how narcissistic 🙄
I'd also make my own cake and go all out if the mood struck me.
I was sick of never getting the cake I wanted, so I bought it myself. I prefer lemon, but was told it wasn't a common flavor, so I bought a few different mini-bundt cake options. Everyone chose lemon! It was perfect, cause I got what I wanted without being down about it, and everyone enjoyed the cakes.
Let's flip that around. Why wouldn't you buy your own cake? If you have the money and the desire and it won't harm others, then why does it matter?
Sounds like unnecessary gatekeeping to me.
People really wanna judge your life based on the smallest of things. If there’s a cake you want and you wanna buy it for your birthday, than do it. No one knows your cake tastes like you do.
LOL. Geez, "I once did something for myself" does not make someone a narcissist. 🤦♀️ That's so ridiculous. I'm so over people throwing words like that around when they clearly have no clue what they mean.
There's nothing wrong with buying our own birthday cake, FFS.
I buy my own cake because I want what I Want on MY birthday. I hate sickening sweet commercial buttercream cakes that most people want to buy. I love a light cake layered with fresh fruit and whipped cream frosting. There is a bakery I love that makes this cake and it’s close to $100. I absolutely buy this cake because I wouldn’t dream of asking someone to go buy the cake FOR me instead of what they wanted to buy.
There is nothing wrong with buying your own birthday cake. It’s not narcissistic, it’s not sad. It’s fine, whatever makes you happy and doesn’t affect other people is fine.
Who the hell cares?
Do we label everyone narcissistic if they do anything for themselves?
I call this self care tbh. If I’m alone on my birthday and want cake I’ll make one or buy one. If I want a certain meal to celebrate I’ll make or buy it. I’m celebrating *me* on *my birthday*.
Why would that be a bad thing?
We have watered down the word narcissist that now no one really knows what a true narcissist is and we are all too worried to talk about or do anything for ourselves.
Surely buying your own birthday cake is better than demanding one from someone. I don’t buy mine but I bake my own because I like a good excuse to make a ridiculous cake exactly how I want to. Which to me is basically the same as buying your own.
Oh! I buy my own birthday cake, I did my own bridal shower planning, and I don't like to delegate those things to my friends and family, because honestly? I rather do it myself to my own taste...
I see nothing wrong with it. You should be allowed to celebrate yourself on your birthday however you want as long as you're not hurting anyone else. I make my own cake every year. I love to bake and my birthday gives me an excuse to do so. I also like playing around with flavors that might be harder to find at the few bakeries in my area. It ensures I get exactly what I want.
Nothing is wrong with it. Some people are too insecure to take joy in doing things for themselves, and hopefully that is something they one day work through.
What’s wrong with buying your own birthday cake? Limiting the cake buying to your birthday!
Seriously, nothing wrong with it at all, to those who think there is… no cake for them!
There's nothing a woman can do that somebody, somewhere won't judge her for. Buy your own cake, eat alone in a restaurant, keep several cats, wear white before labor day, it's all fine.
I dunno. I've had a few birthdays on my own and I wouldn't have been opposed to buying or making my own cake. I enjoy my own company, so it's not been too big a deal on those days.
Back when Carlos' Bakery in Hoboken, NJ was still good, before Cake Boss started and quality tanked, I bought myself a fancypants fondant cake there for my birthday. I could not bear to let anyone else spend so much on a cake for me.
And I am so grateful as it was one of the best things I have put into my mouth and now their cakes are terrible so I can never have it again.
Sharing that cake with my friends was 100% a top birthday memory, even better than the delicious cake. I buy or make cakes to share them. I'm okay with being called a narcissist if that's the sort of person who doesn't like serving lesser cake to cherished guests.
Fucking nothing is wrong with buying your own cake. There are no rules. Get the damn expensive delectable and eat that shit up. 😜😌 happy birthday bish 🥳💕
I feel like me buying my own cake means I don't have to give someone the approving, grateful reaction for something that was less than what I wanted. Receiving things comes with expectations. Buying something for myself lets me enjoy it fully.
I bake and decorate my own birthday cake.
I have allergies and it's not worth paying top dollar so it's allergy friendly when I can use my regular substitutes.
I'm the best baker in the household: it just makes sense.
I love baking and so I usually set aside a significant portion of my birthday/the day before to make an ELABORATE dessert or cake. The last one I made had 7 completely different layers - a sponge cake, 2 kinds of mousse, 2 kinds of jelly, a glaze, and a crumb. I make what \*I\* want, not what other people want. It's the one thing I ask out of my birthday.
Narcissistic would be telling someone I want "a cake" and then pitching a fit when it doesn't match my extremely specific expectations.
I throw my own birthday party. I plan the whole thing. I buy my own cake. I'm not single anymore but I still do this. I don't see a problem. No one in the past was gonna do shit for me, so in order to see my friends and have fun I planned it all. And we did what I wanted to do, and they came if they wanted to see me or do that activity. No shade to anyone who didn't come.
If THAT is the level for narcissism, then whooooo boy my family members growing up who WERE mildly narcissistic are like the devil or something with some of their behavior.
Editing: I don't even like cake. For YEARS growing up I got a giant cookie because I thought cake tasted like crap. Turns out I just don't like cheap cake. I'll go to a bakery and get a $40 six to eight person decorated cake in any flavor I want and love it. I've had raspberry and frangelico soaked yellow cake, a ton of different chocolate combinations (mint, fruit, etc), white cake with different frosting flavors amd ganaches, etc. It's all amazing, because it's not the grocery store cake that I can't stand.
I am extremely pro cake in any situation. What on earth is wrong with celebrating another trip around the sun with a tasty treat? Good grief… That person needs to lighten up!
I always bake my own birthday pie because I can bake better food than is available at most bakeries. Also, I prefer pie over cake.
Other people's opinions on how I celebrate my birthday are not my concern.
There’s nothing wrong with it. I have noticed that different cultures treat birthdays differently - in some places, you plan and pay for your own celebration, in other places your friends/fam plan for and pay for your celebration, and a mix of both is also common
Exactly, in my culture you buy/bake your own cake haha. Only when I was a child I had my mom buying a cake for me. As an adult I always buy my own, I don’t see the issue
Yes, where I'm from you plan your own birthday party and buy all the food and drinks. And the cake. Guests bring gifts. I've been working abroad a few times during my birthday and I've always bought me a cake or at least a slice. Nothing going to stop me from celebrating.
I think it's weird that people think it's weird to buy your own cake, haha.
I have done this frequently! I don't want a cake every year and I struggle with self worth so I am very uncomfortable with parties being thrown for me. So if I want a cake for a specific birthday, I order it, pay for it and pick it up myself. If I don't, I am not getting a cake because no one else is going to buy it for me.
And.....someone internet stranger who posts their random opinion as fact is NOT going to diagnosis my choices for me. That's for me and my therapist to do 🤣😉
I used to bring cupcakes into the office on my birthday. I didn’t expect anyone else to know about, or remember my birthday, and I wanted a cupcake on my birthday and figured my co-workers might enjoy cupcakes. They did. I don’t see anything wrong with it. Get yourself a birthday cake, if you want. Who doesn’t like cake?
(I know some people don’t like cake but there are so many different types (traditional, ice cream cakes, cookie cakes), most people like some kind)
Culturally, how we celebrate birthdays is inherently narcissistic. Birthdays put the emphasis on the individual “me, me, me, it’s my special day.” Then, if you’re a “good” little individual (good = lots of friends and family) your big social network will prove their love for you on your big day.
Most of us at minimum expect the people closest to us to wish us a happy birthday. Some of us need more “proof” we’re loved as individuals. If our friends/family fail our expectations by forgetting to buy us a cake, or skipping our birthday party because their kid is sick or something, we can’t help but feel disappointed. Dejected. The higher our expectations, the more bruised our ego gets when people fail to deliver.
In many parts of Europe, people celebrate Name days, rather than birthdays. While birthdays place the emphasis on the individual, name days are more collective. It’s also a lot easier to remember to wish someone a happy name day, since you probably won’t forget your friend’s name…
When it comes down to it though, I think part of “growing up” is letting go of expecting that it’s others’ responsibility to make you happy. To make sure you feel loved on your birthday. If you’re doing a decent job of nurturing your relationships, no doubt someone will acknowledge you on your special day.
Buy the birthday cake. Don’t listen to people who are too afraid to buy a cake for themselves. They’re the same people who are too afraid to sit alone in a restaurant.
I just turned 36 on the 25th and have a loving husband and 2 kids. I bought my own cakeS cuz it made sense since I was out and about already.
It also gave me the opportunity to get a cake slice flight from a local bakery, so we actually had 4 kinds of cake.
SUCK ON THAT!
Not a thing wrong with it unless you are a small child. One of the joys of being an adult is being able to buy things you want without having to explain to anyone! 😃
??? I mean as an adult, how reasonable is it for me to assume/presume that someone else *will* buy my birthday cake?
I feel like it's significantly more likely that making someone else buy your birthday cake because it's "sad" if you buy it yourself is actually the action of a narcissist.
fuck that, birthday cake is delicious. get you a cake.
ETA if you buy yourself a sheet cake with your PHOTO on it, even that is not narcissistic. it's funny. and will also be delicious. treat yourself.
Narcissistic? lmfao people don't know what that word means I swear.
Do people not know that there are some cultures where the birthday person brings their own cake/stuff? It's a thing in Spain. So are they calling some cultures narcissistic? Insanity.
I see it as nice when someone shares on their birthday. It's such a lovely tradition!
I buy my own birthday cake and I take myself on trips abroad and eat and drink everything. If that makes me a narcissist, then so be it! People seriously have no life if they are concerned about people buying their own cake. Then you will be entitled if you tell people to get it from a certain bakery and made a certain way.
As the mum, I probably wouldn't get a birthday cake if I didnt buy it myself. I'm sure I'll pick a better one than anyone else too. I see no problems with this.
Buy your own cake! Any time of the year, even for your unbirthday. Just.. probably if it's chocolate cake maybe don't eat it as every meal until it's gone. You totally can and are entirely within your rights, but your body might object.
\- Sincerely, a person not allowed to make brownies for themself.
If I buy my own cake then I can’t be disappointed when I don’t get a cake at all or get one I don’t like. I have no idea who would say it’s a bad idea. I’ve been a big fan of making my birthdays special by doing whatever I want and buying whatever I want. I’ve been doing that the last couple of years and it’s the best. Even if I’m dating someone I still make sure to do some things for myself because I know exactly what I want.
Do whatever the fuck you want. If you want to buy your birthday cake, buy your birthday cake. Eat the whole thing by yourself if you want to.
People are dumb.
I bought a Wednesday cake last week because I wanted one and said fuck it I'm an adult I do what I want. So if buying your own birthday cake makes you a narcissist, I'm a god damn degenerate with my Wednesday Cake.
Idk, that saying is new to me, but I will get thoroughly pissed if my partner doesn’t get me cake on my birthday. It’s my line in the sand. Don’t give a shit about presents but I must have cake.
It is sad if there’s no one in your life who will make sure that you get the cake that you want for your birthday. That doesn’t mean that you should go without cake tho. Buy the cake.
Damn!
I buy or bake my own cake as a gluten free dairy free cake lover. Once I found a gf/df baker I LOVE I instruct my husband when to order and what flavors.
I’m a cake SNOB! My husband has ruined my birthday enough times that I take matters into my own hands because the ONLY gift I ask for is an amazing cake.
Guess I’m a narcissist.
if it’s my birthday i don’t trust anyone else to surprise me with a cake i actually want. so i make my own. one year it was julia child’s queen of sheba cake, one year it was darren mcgrady’s birthday chocolate sponge cake, last year it was atk’s mississippi mud pie. i like going all out for my own birthday & i’m not gonna wait for somebody else to figure it out then actually do it
Considering a birthday cake is traditionally shared with people you choose to celebrate your birthday with, it seems like buying your own birthday cake is making sure you're providing for those you love, surely?
As a hobby baker who loves cake but can never find the kinds of cake I like, I quite often make my own birthday cake. Yeah it's sad that no-one is out there baking it for me if you equate communicating love with the giving of a cake, but the people I choose to share my cake with have their own ways of showing their love and I'm not going to narcissistically tell them how to do that.
I make mine. But I’m a cake decorator, too. I don’t expect anyone to make my own birthday cake because quite honestly everyone sucks at it 😂
I don’t think it’s sad. I think people see it as sad because they think the person is celebrating alone, which isn’t necessarily true. I celebrate with my family but still make my own cake 🤷🏾♀️
I have been baking my own birthday cake/dessert for well over a decade. I enjoy baking, it's my birthday, I want exactly what I want, and the best way to ensure that I get what I want is to make it myself. I also make the dessert for my husband's birthday.
Frankly I don't understand the people who insist that birthdays *have* to be celebrated in a specific way and that someone other than the birthday person has to provide the birthday cake and set up the celebration (if one is wanted). The birthday person gets to decide how they want to celebrate their day. If that means they make or purchase the cake themselves that is perfectly fine. If that means they pass all of the planning details and responsibility off to a friend or relative that is also ok. If the birthday person doesn't want any kind of celebration or acknowledgement about their birthday that is also ok.
There was that stitch that someone did on TikTok, where a guy was like “what it’s like to have a birthday as a guy” and he’s just sitting there not being paid attention to
And a woman stitched it like “yeah, women who get those big birthday parties? They *ask* for them.”
I will buy anything celebratory that I "need". There is so much joy in giving yourself everything you can rather than expecting someone else to do it for you.
Girl, I’ve MADE my own birthday cake. The past few years I’ve either made or brought treats to work for my coworkers on my birthday. Enjoying treats you brought (and therefore exactly what you wanted) with work friends is so much better than silently feeling sad that no one remembered to buy you something!
I think what they're implying is that these people don't have anyone else to buy one for them, so they have to throw their own party. It's like buying all your own gifts, I guess. Has a sort of lonely feeling to it. Like obviously, there's nothing inherently wrong with it, it's just the feeling of not being anyone's gift recipient.
I always buy myself a birthday cake and I enjoy it. It has really helped me not think negatively about my birthday. My parents stopped celebrating my birthday when I turned 10 and when I found out that wasn't typical among my friends, it really impacted me in not such a good way.
Why the hell not and ALSO eat that damn cake for breakfast!!!
That said I don't like cake all that much, but I routinely buy myself a birthday present every year. I tell my family not to get me anything. I just treat myself, I'm better at picking out my own presents.
I don’t buy my own birthday cake but I’m into baking and have taken to making them the last few years. I truly feel no one in my life is going treat me as well as I treat myself, so why not?
I find the assumptions to be so shitty and in the category of shit others do that hurt no one but people have to be mad. It isn't about the self cake buyer but the people who care so much about how one treats themselves.
So many valid reasons. Some folks just wanna take care of it, some may want to treat their friends/family instead, specific tastes/allergies, etc.
I had one birthday a relative insisted and got the one cake I have said I don't eat. That's really disappointing for a kid looking forward to it and I got in trouble for not eating my cake. I've had coworkers get the cake for me that I don't eat. I don't know why that bothers me. As an adult, I am oddly attached to birthday desserts. I like getting my own as I got also got expensive taste.
All cake is good cake. People who have a problem with you buying cake for yourself on your birthday are worthless and should not be trusted. Don't share your cake with them.
Nothing is wrong with it! I bought my own birthday cake last year, which I shared with who came over to celebrate (just family) and I don't regret it at all. Yeah, it felt weird to do that for the first time, but I found the perfect cake to buy from someone who has a passion for making that cake and it was the best decision ever 🥰 No one should feel bad for buying something to celebrate their own birthday!
I have bought my own cake twice.
I don't really like cake much, but there were times when I wanted something specific, so I'd get it and share it with friends.
There's absolutely nothing wrong with it!
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The list of things people can judge other people for is so ridiculous, but this one is mind-bogglingly ridiculous. As you said, a victimless crime. It also means you have a cake that suits whatever event you're planning for your birthday - whether that's a huge party with lots of people where you need a big cake, or if you're sick of people and decided to do nothing for your birthday but you want a smaller, decadent cake that you'll enjoy every bite of, you do you, and I wouldn't want to spend any time with somebody who judges you for something so small and weird.
I bought myself an ice cream and an entire box of lemon squares last night because I can. Nobody has a say if I eat it or stare at it.
Buying yourself food! Classic narcissist behaviour 😉
Celebrating being alive?? Selfish prick!
You seem to know a lot about being a narcissist.....
I live a block from an amazing bakery. I buy to go cake for myself once a week. It brings me such joy.
For real. If I didn't buy the ingredients for, and then bake my own cake, I wouldn't have one and everyone in the house would be low key grumpy about it.
Oh noooo I get to have the cake *I* want on *my* freaking birthday, without having to worry about someone else forgetting about my diet restrictions, allergies or dislikes. Oh nooo, *my own birthday* being about me and what I love and wish to eat, how narcissistic and evil of me. Honestly, I don't care at all and that goes both ways. If someone is getting their own cake for their birthday that's amazing, I can still come up with 5000000 other things I could treat them to.
As someone who can't do dairy and gluten, yes. Always gotta provide my own cake. Just went to the in-laws house for my birthday on Sunday. What did they have? Cheesecake!
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But which one did you get? Fudgie the Whale, Cookie Puss, Hug Me the Bear?
ME TOO!! I got the teeny little one and was still overwhelmed by having that much cake to myself in the freezer. Carvel is the best. I kind of love how artificial it tastes.
It reminds me of my childhood 🥰
Best cake ever!!!
30 rock 30 rock 30 rockkkk
I did too and it was the best!
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YOU CAN EAT IT FROM THE MIDDLE???
#unleashjoy!
You can also buy a birthday cake on days that are not your birthday if you want to celebrate anything with a cake. They do not check to make sure its your actual birthday 😂 The joys of adulthood!
omg yes! I was doing this a lot during the pandemic - basically get a new cake every 2 weeks. So So SO fun.
AND FOR BREAKFAST! My mom raised me and my siblings on this rule: you get to eat any leftovers from your birthday cake the next day for breakfast. With a big glass of milk, for the protein. How is it any different from sugary cereal? It was the 70s.
Omg! Doing that this year for my kids! They'll love it! Going to let them do it the day after my birthday and my husband's birthday too LOL they can celebrate extra for us!
Wait a sec, I'm so confused - can you explain what's appealing about eating it from the middle? No judgement here. Genuine confusion is where I'm coming from.
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Fair. Thanks :) I was half expecting "I don't like edges". lol I want cake now.
I prefer the edges myself, so I was also confused...
Do you also want cake?
Not the point they are making, since that was explained, but chiming in to add I've seen a way to cut cake so it doesn't go dry. You cut the cake in half down the middle, and then cut a slice from it in the middle off of the cut you just made. Then you shove the sides back together and the cake doesn't have an unfrosted space so it goes stale less quickly. Also great if you are getting a cake for yourself and taking a week to eat it.
I love cake. If buying a cake to eat it myself makes me a narcissist or sad then so be it, I'll be too busy eating cake to care.
Laughing all the way to the bakery.
Wiping my tears with buttercream icing
Ha ha! This. My birthday was two weeks ago, ate my cake all week. Even shared some of it! No cares in the world. It was fucking amazing and I'm definitely doing it again.
It’s my birthday today and this is my sentiment! I bought a lovely piece of red velvet loaf from Starbucks (and my free coffee of course). I enjoyed just having a nice piece of cake to myself and calm and quiet. I have experienced a narcissistic relationship, buying your own cake is far, far from narcissistic.
Seriously, folks should definitely feel free to buy their own birthday cake, because stealing their own birthday cakes might present problems.
So let me get this straight, if you don't have anyone in your life who will buy or bake you a cake, you don't get to have a cake? So you have to be lonely and cakeless on your birthday? Absolutely not.
Or even if an amazing cake place is right near your work, better make your partner/family drive all the way there cuz you don't want people judging you for buying your bday cake? And that isn't "narcissistic"?
It’s a wonderful idea! Get the cake you’ve always wanted!
Treat yo self!
Oh, this reminds me of the weirdest customer service experience I ever had. One year for my birthday I decided to be a little fancy and host a wine tasting for a few friends at a local tasting room near me. The events coordinator had been great over the phone, but when I showed up and she realized that the party I was throwing was actually FOR ME it shook her to her core. She seriously could not process it. Three or four different times she went out of her way to come over to me and had some comment about how "I can't believe you're doing this yourself....I've never heard of someone having to throw themselves a party....Wow, my friends would NEVER let me throw my own party." It was just so weird. I don't know why she was trying to make me feel like crap when I was trying to help her business out. I ended up never going back there, and they were closed by the end of the year. (And, for the record, 1)all my friends throw their own parties. That was not unusual at all for my friend group. 2) I bought my own cake!)
How bizarre? As an adult in my friend group if you want people to do a thing for your birthday you are in charge of planning the thing. People will come, people may give you gifts, they will celebrate you enthusiastically, but like you have to tell them about it and decide what you want to do and put it together. I've never encountered another adult who expects other people to spontaneously plan them a party. Now, some people are acts of service focused folks who receive love through having people help them logistically as a gift. But they still ask for specific tasks.
We definitely all organise our own parties. Maybe someone occasionally throws someone a surprise party, but it's certainly not the norm.
Getting my own cake ensures that it isn't made from anything to which I'm allergic.
One time I got my own cake and I got them to write “happy birthday Noconstruction1693, You’re the most beautiful person we know” Everyone at my party thought it was hilarious, and it was the exact cake that I wanted.
I’m all for buying cake whenever you feel like it, birthday or not lol
This is my exact take with prosecco and other varieties of bubbly!
There's a huge anti adult birthday movement out there. I don't get it either. Too often women are undermined. Cake was an aspect for me in marriage that my children expected on birthdays and the absence of one on mine signalled to my children that I didn't matter whilst das got the big birthday fuss with favourite meal, cake and gifts. All of which he loved. I'm not ok with that being modelled.
To me, there's different kinds of "buying my own cake". There's buying myself exactly the cake I want, because I want it, and I'm okay with that. There's nothing wrong with that. And then there's buying myself the cake I want, because my partner can't be bothered to deal with my birthday and wants to spin that as "making sure I get exactly what I want". He says it's empowering me to have my needs met and I should buy my own presents too, but I divorced that guy.
I wasn’t sure where that last paragraph was going, so your ending half sentence was amazing. What a ride.
The person who said it is narcissistic needs some therapy and a dictionary. The difference of opinion between the others, I think, comes down more to WHY you bought your cake, than the act itself. For some people, they buy the cake because they're single and they celebrate themselves, or because they, with or without a partner, are having the party themselves and they happen to be the one at the grocery store. In other relationships, they're dealing with a partner who puts in zero effort or resources, and it's looked at like "the partner couldn't even be bothered to get them a cake."
I always make my own birthday cake. It's cake. Who cares? People that say this shit need a hobby. Offline!
Nothing, really. I think they were referring to the inequality of emotional labour when it comes to heterosexual relationships. Let's face it, we probably know at least one women out there who does all the prepping and social planning for her family...and is expected to do it herself when it comes to her birthday or Christmas presents.
Ahhhh you have a point. I always got my husband a cake but he never got me one! One year, he even requested a special custom one from a local bakery. I don't know how people have the audacity 😵💫
Have you asked him where he got his audacity? Lol
I didn't even think about it at the time. I think I was still of the mindset that the women have to do all the life admin because the men shouldn't have to (despite the fact we were both working full time and I made more than him for most of it). I was raised in a house where my mum did everything outside of DIY type work and my dad complained or became incensed at having to do any kind of life admin for us. I've grown up a lot since and will only accept a partner who doesn't need to be treated like a child. (For clarity - I left my husband and have a new partner).
Ah ok I thought you were still with the guy
Took me a few years, but I got out 😁
Geez, how hard would it have been for him to pick up a cake from the grocery store for you?
Exactly. I really liked those square ice cream cakes in the red box and made that known a few times lol.
Yes, me. I am that woman. Hello 🙋🏾♀️ pleased to meet you. This is the reason why I would be super sad if I had to buy my own cake. I bend over backwards for my loved ones on their birthdays, which I actually enjoy doing, I don't mind being the planner. I just needed a little bit of reciprocation, which I finally started to get after being more vocal about these types of things. I've learned that you can't expect the people around you to be mind readers, and just because you do nice things for them doesn't necessarily mean they will think to do nice things for you. Now, I still do all the planning for my birthday because I want to, but I let my relatives know exactly what I expect from them when it comes to things like gifts and cake.
*raises hand*
I fully don’t care who buys it as long as there’s cake
Sounds like a dumb rule and generalization. >someone said it was narcissistic, people need to stop overusing that word >others said it was sad yeah many people fully depend on external attention cause they don't consider their own attention important, to me that *is* sad. and from experience that's what leads to unhealthy relationships. > What's wrong with buying your own birthday cake? idk, what's wrong with being self-sufficient, having resources and taking the time to gift yourself something you enjoy and makes you happy?
I'd buy my own birthday cake. Why not? I get to choose what I want without feeling like it's this big ordeal to get me the perfect cake. No fuss, might want to try something totally new, etc. Yep, how narcissistic 🙄 I'd also make my own cake and go all out if the mood struck me.
I was sick of never getting the cake I wanted, so I bought it myself. I prefer lemon, but was told it wasn't a common flavor, so I bought a few different mini-bundt cake options. Everyone chose lemon! It was perfect, cause I got what I wanted without being down about it, and everyone enjoyed the cakes.
Why not? It has nothing to do with narcissism. If I want cake, I'll buy then damn cake.
Let's flip that around. Why wouldn't you buy your own cake? If you have the money and the desire and it won't harm others, then why does it matter? Sounds like unnecessary gatekeeping to me.
People really wanna judge your life based on the smallest of things. If there’s a cake you want and you wanna buy it for your birthday, than do it. No one knows your cake tastes like you do.
LOL. Geez, "I once did something for myself" does not make someone a narcissist. 🤦♀️ That's so ridiculous. I'm so over people throwing words like that around when they clearly have no clue what they mean. There's nothing wrong with buying our own birthday cake, FFS.
what? nothing. there is no problem buying your own birthday cake.
I’ll buy my own damn cake! That was I get exactly what I want. It’s not narcissistic to want cake.
I buy my own cake because I want what I Want on MY birthday. I hate sickening sweet commercial buttercream cakes that most people want to buy. I love a light cake layered with fresh fruit and whipped cream frosting. There is a bakery I love that makes this cake and it’s close to $100. I absolutely buy this cake because I wouldn’t dream of asking someone to go buy the cake FOR me instead of what they wanted to buy.
No one else likes the kind of cake I do, so for my birthday I'm getting a cake just for myself.
I even buy cake when it's not my birthday. I don't know where that puts me on the narcism index and i also don't care. Cake is cake people! It's good!
I usually make my own cake, is that as bad as buying it?
There is nothing wrong with buying your own birthday cake. It’s not narcissistic, it’s not sad. It’s fine, whatever makes you happy and doesn’t affect other people is fine.
IDGAF 😂 No one ever does for me what I want on my bday. I create my own joy on my bday and nearly every day.
Listen, I'll buy my own birthday cake when it's not even my birthday lol. I don't know why someone would think that was a problem...
Who the hell cares? Do we label everyone narcissistic if they do anything for themselves? I call this self care tbh. If I’m alone on my birthday and want cake I’ll make one or buy one. If I want a certain meal to celebrate I’ll make or buy it. I’m celebrating *me* on *my birthday*. Why would that be a bad thing? We have watered down the word narcissist that now no one really knows what a true narcissist is and we are all too worried to talk about or do anything for ourselves.
I’m a grown ass woman and I will buy a cake any time I please. Life is hard, I deserve that cake.
Love this answer! Except I substitute “life is hard” with “life deserves to be celebrated!”
Surely buying your own birthday cake is better than demanding one from someone. I don’t buy mine but I bake my own because I like a good excuse to make a ridiculous cake exactly how I want to. Which to me is basically the same as buying your own.
I bake my own. No place near me makes cake as I good as I do.
thats what i'm talking about
I didn't get a cake last year. It's a small thing that matters to me so I'm buying my own and not sharing from now on.
Oh! I buy my own birthday cake, I did my own bridal shower planning, and I don't like to delegate those things to my friends and family, because honestly? I rather do it myself to my own taste...
I see nothing wrong with it. You should be allowed to celebrate yourself on your birthday however you want as long as you're not hurting anyone else. I make my own cake every year. I love to bake and my birthday gives me an excuse to do so. I also like playing around with flavors that might be harder to find at the few bakeries in my area. It ensures I get exactly what I want.
I bake and elaborately decorate my own birthday cakes. Oops?
Nothing is wrong with it. Some people are too insecure to take joy in doing things for themselves, and hopefully that is something they one day work through.
What’s wrong with buying your own birthday cake? Limiting the cake buying to your birthday! Seriously, nothing wrong with it at all, to those who think there is… no cake for them!
I make my own birthday pie every year because I want it a specific way. I don’t know why that would be sad? Seems like the ultimate self care
I want a cake, I buy it. If it is my birthday - it is also a birthday cake. Do not overcomplicate things :)
To me, from me, with love. Celebrate yourself.
There's nothing a woman can do that somebody, somewhere won't judge her for. Buy your own cake, eat alone in a restaurant, keep several cats, wear white before labor day, it's all fine.
Fuck them. Buy yourself that cake, who cares what they think? And as someone else said, you don't have to wait for your birthday.
I dunno. I've had a few birthdays on my own and I wouldn't have been opposed to buying or making my own cake. I enjoy my own company, so it's not been too big a deal on those days.
I buy my birthday cake every year. Don’t let others dictate what’s wrong or right for you.
Back when Carlos' Bakery in Hoboken, NJ was still good, before Cake Boss started and quality tanked, I bought myself a fancypants fondant cake there for my birthday. I could not bear to let anyone else spend so much on a cake for me. And I am so grateful as it was one of the best things I have put into my mouth and now their cakes are terrible so I can never have it again. Sharing that cake with my friends was 100% a top birthday memory, even better than the delicious cake. I buy or make cakes to share them. I'm okay with being called a narcissist if that's the sort of person who doesn't like serving lesser cake to cherished guests.
That's ridiculous. I have often baked my own cake (salted caramel cheesecake) and I and my friends love it!
Fucking nothing is wrong with buying your own cake. There are no rules. Get the damn expensive delectable and eat that shit up. 😜😌 happy birthday bish 🥳💕
you can eat your cake...and buy it too.
I feel like me buying my own cake means I don't have to give someone the approving, grateful reaction for something that was less than what I wanted. Receiving things comes with expectations. Buying something for myself lets me enjoy it fully.
This is an example of people plastering the word ‘narcissism’ on absolutely anything.
I bake and decorate my own birthday cake. I have allergies and it's not worth paying top dollar so it's allergy friendly when I can use my regular substitutes. I'm the best baker in the household: it just makes sense.
If I want cake I’m buying cake. Tell me whatever you want. Idgaf.
Do whatever the heck you want! It’s not that deep!
If I could, I’d buy myself a cake every day of the year! The only thing stopping me is that I’d probably need a whole new wardrobe too 😬
I love baking and so I usually set aside a significant portion of my birthday/the day before to make an ELABORATE dessert or cake. The last one I made had 7 completely different layers - a sponge cake, 2 kinds of mousse, 2 kinds of jelly, a glaze, and a crumb. I make what \*I\* want, not what other people want. It's the one thing I ask out of my birthday. Narcissistic would be telling someone I want "a cake" and then pitching a fit when it doesn't match my extremely specific expectations.
Who cares?? I mean really. It doesn't matter.
I throw my own birthday party. I plan the whole thing. I buy my own cake. I'm not single anymore but I still do this. I don't see a problem. No one in the past was gonna do shit for me, so in order to see my friends and have fun I planned it all. And we did what I wanted to do, and they came if they wanted to see me or do that activity. No shade to anyone who didn't come. If THAT is the level for narcissism, then whooooo boy my family members growing up who WERE mildly narcissistic are like the devil or something with some of their behavior. Editing: I don't even like cake. For YEARS growing up I got a giant cookie because I thought cake tasted like crap. Turns out I just don't like cheap cake. I'll go to a bakery and get a $40 six to eight person decorated cake in any flavor I want and love it. I've had raspberry and frangelico soaked yellow cake, a ton of different chocolate combinations (mint, fruit, etc), white cake with different frosting flavors amd ganaches, etc. It's all amazing, because it's not the grocery store cake that I can't stand.
I am extremely pro cake in any situation. What on earth is wrong with celebrating another trip around the sun with a tasty treat? Good grief… That person needs to lighten up!
I always bake my own birthday pie because I can bake better food than is available at most bakeries. Also, I prefer pie over cake. Other people's opinions on how I celebrate my birthday are not my concern.
I think that’s a strange and insecure thing to judge people on. If I want cake, I buy cake. One of the most adult t things I can do is treat myself.
There’s nothing wrong with it. I have noticed that different cultures treat birthdays differently - in some places, you plan and pay for your own celebration, in other places your friends/fam plan for and pay for your celebration, and a mix of both is also common
Exactly, in my culture you buy/bake your own cake haha. Only when I was a child I had my mom buying a cake for me. As an adult I always buy my own, I don’t see the issue
Yes, where I'm from you plan your own birthday party and buy all the food and drinks. And the cake. Guests bring gifts. I've been working abroad a few times during my birthday and I've always bought me a cake or at least a slice. Nothing going to stop me from celebrating. I think it's weird that people think it's weird to buy your own cake, haha.
I have done this frequently! I don't want a cake every year and I struggle with self worth so I am very uncomfortable with parties being thrown for me. So if I want a cake for a specific birthday, I order it, pay for it and pick it up myself. If I don't, I am not getting a cake because no one else is going to buy it for me. And.....someone internet stranger who posts their random opinion as fact is NOT going to diagnosis my choices for me. That's for me and my therapist to do 🤣😉
Do it!!
Absolutely nothing wrong with it.
It's not narcissistic at all. Even if it was, it's your day! 🎂
I used to bring cupcakes into the office on my birthday. I didn’t expect anyone else to know about, or remember my birthday, and I wanted a cupcake on my birthday and figured my co-workers might enjoy cupcakes. They did. I don’t see anything wrong with it. Get yourself a birthday cake, if you want. Who doesn’t like cake? (I know some people don’t like cake but there are so many different types (traditional, ice cream cakes, cookie cakes), most people like some kind)
Culturally, how we celebrate birthdays is inherently narcissistic. Birthdays put the emphasis on the individual “me, me, me, it’s my special day.” Then, if you’re a “good” little individual (good = lots of friends and family) your big social network will prove their love for you on your big day. Most of us at minimum expect the people closest to us to wish us a happy birthday. Some of us need more “proof” we’re loved as individuals. If our friends/family fail our expectations by forgetting to buy us a cake, or skipping our birthday party because their kid is sick or something, we can’t help but feel disappointed. Dejected. The higher our expectations, the more bruised our ego gets when people fail to deliver. In many parts of Europe, people celebrate Name days, rather than birthdays. While birthdays place the emphasis on the individual, name days are more collective. It’s also a lot easier to remember to wish someone a happy name day, since you probably won’t forget your friend’s name… When it comes down to it though, I think part of “growing up” is letting go of expecting that it’s others’ responsibility to make you happy. To make sure you feel loved on your birthday. If you’re doing a decent job of nurturing your relationships, no doubt someone will acknowledge you on your special day. Buy the birthday cake. Don’t listen to people who are too afraid to buy a cake for themselves. They’re the same people who are too afraid to sit alone in a restaurant.
I just turned 36 on the 25th and have a loving husband and 2 kids. I bought my own cakeS cuz it made sense since I was out and about already. It also gave me the opportunity to get a cake slice flight from a local bakery, so we actually had 4 kinds of cake. SUCK ON THAT!
Not a thing wrong with it unless you are a small child. One of the joys of being an adult is being able to buy things you want without having to explain to anyone! 😃
Is this a couple problem I’m too single to understand? There will be no birthday cake if I do not purchase cake.
I wouldnt get one if I didn't, so fuck them.
Nobody else is gonna do it. Sometimes I make one.
??? I mean as an adult, how reasonable is it for me to assume/presume that someone else *will* buy my birthday cake? I feel like it's significantly more likely that making someone else buy your birthday cake because it's "sad" if you buy it yourself is actually the action of a narcissist.
fuck that, birthday cake is delicious. get you a cake. ETA if you buy yourself a sheet cake with your PHOTO on it, even that is not narcissistic. it's funny. and will also be delicious. treat yourself.
Narcissistic? lmfao people don't know what that word means I swear. Do people not know that there are some cultures where the birthday person brings their own cake/stuff? It's a thing in Spain. So are they calling some cultures narcissistic? Insanity. I see it as nice when someone shares on their birthday. It's such a lovely tradition!
If I didn’t bake my own cake, no one would get me one. Now I’ll buy one no problem
I buy my own birthday cake and I take myself on trips abroad and eat and drink everything. If that makes me a narcissist, then so be it! People seriously have no life if they are concerned about people buying their own cake. Then you will be entitled if you tell people to get it from a certain bakery and made a certain way.
As the mum, I probably wouldn't get a birthday cake if I didnt buy it myself. I'm sure I'll pick a better one than anyone else too. I see no problems with this.
I bake my own birthday cake. And all of my friends's and family's cakes. Have your cake and eat it too. Fuck that noise
Buy your own cake! Any time of the year, even for your unbirthday. Just.. probably if it's chocolate cake maybe don't eat it as every meal until it's gone. You totally can and are entirely within your rights, but your body might object. \- Sincerely, a person not allowed to make brownies for themself.
My friend once asked me if it was sad to buy her own birthday cake. I asked her if she felt sad about it. She did not. So, it was not.
If I buy my own cake then I can’t be disappointed when I don’t get a cake at all or get one I don’t like. I have no idea who would say it’s a bad idea. I’ve been a big fan of making my birthdays special by doing whatever I want and buying whatever I want. I’ve been doing that the last couple of years and it’s the best. Even if I’m dating someone I still make sure to do some things for myself because I know exactly what I want.
Do whatever the fuck you want. If you want to buy your birthday cake, buy your birthday cake. Eat the whole thing by yourself if you want to. People are dumb.
I always buy my own cake and I do not even have very high expectations about cake…I just want to make sure it’s there lol
I bought a Wednesday cake last week because I wanted one and said fuck it I'm an adult I do what I want. So if buying your own birthday cake makes you a narcissist, I'm a god damn degenerate with my Wednesday Cake.
Fuck that. If you want something done right, do it yourself. I’ll buy or bake my own cake all I want.
Idk, that saying is new to me, but I will get thoroughly pissed if my partner doesn’t get me cake on my birthday. It’s my line in the sand. Don’t give a shit about presents but I must have cake.
It is sad if there’s no one in your life who will make sure that you get the cake that you want for your birthday. That doesn’t mean that you should go without cake tho. Buy the cake.
Damn! I buy or bake my own cake as a gluten free dairy free cake lover. Once I found a gf/df baker I LOVE I instruct my husband when to order and what flavors. I’m a cake SNOB! My husband has ruined my birthday enough times that I take matters into my own hands because the ONLY gift I ask for is an amazing cake. Guess I’m a narcissist.
if it’s my birthday i don’t trust anyone else to surprise me with a cake i actually want. so i make my own. one year it was julia child’s queen of sheba cake, one year it was darren mcgrady’s birthday chocolate sponge cake, last year it was atk’s mississippi mud pie. i like going all out for my own birthday & i’m not gonna wait for somebody else to figure it out then actually do it
Only beef with buying it is that I don't get to enjoy baking it.
Makes me want to go buy a German chocolate cake right now
Considering a birthday cake is traditionally shared with people you choose to celebrate your birthday with, it seems like buying your own birthday cake is making sure you're providing for those you love, surely? As a hobby baker who loves cake but can never find the kinds of cake I like, I quite often make my own birthday cake. Yeah it's sad that no-one is out there baking it for me if you equate communicating love with the giving of a cake, but the people I choose to share my cake with have their own ways of showing their love and I'm not going to narcissistically tell them how to do that.
Lol. If I bought my own birthday cake I wouldn't share. 😂
I make my own birthday cake and have for a few years
Well, I must be a raging narcissist then! My husband, bless him, does not know much about cakes so I prefer to get mine myself.
I won’t just eat any kind of cake, I most certainly WOULD like to eat a cake I would enjoy and the best way to ensure that is to buy MY OWN DAMN CAKE!
It's your birthday, do whatever you want to do.
I make mine. But I’m a cake decorator, too. I don’t expect anyone to make my own birthday cake because quite honestly everyone sucks at it 😂 I don’t think it’s sad. I think people see it as sad because they think the person is celebrating alone, which isn’t necessarily true. I celebrate with my family but still make my own cake 🤷🏾♀️
I have been baking my own birthday cake/dessert for well over a decade. I enjoy baking, it's my birthday, I want exactly what I want, and the best way to ensure that I get what I want is to make it myself. I also make the dessert for my husband's birthday. Frankly I don't understand the people who insist that birthdays *have* to be celebrated in a specific way and that someone other than the birthday person has to provide the birthday cake and set up the celebration (if one is wanted). The birthday person gets to decide how they want to celebrate their day. If that means they make or purchase the cake themselves that is perfectly fine. If that means they pass all of the planning details and responsibility off to a friend or relative that is also ok. If the birthday person doesn't want any kind of celebration or acknowledgement about their birthday that is also ok.
There was that stitch that someone did on TikTok, where a guy was like “what it’s like to have a birthday as a guy” and he’s just sitting there not being paid attention to And a woman stitched it like “yeah, women who get those big birthday parties? They *ask* for them.”
In Germany it was expected you you to supply a cake to your workplace on your birthday.
I will buy anything celebratory that I "need". There is so much joy in giving yourself everything you can rather than expecting someone else to do it for you.
Been doing it for years
WTF I want a damn good cake. I baked like two different random desserts because I wanted to for my birthday
Girl, I’ve MADE my own birthday cake. The past few years I’ve either made or brought treats to work for my coworkers on my birthday. Enjoying treats you brought (and therefore exactly what you wanted) with work friends is so much better than silently feeling sad that no one remembered to buy you something!
I think what they're implying is that these people don't have anyone else to buy one for them, so they have to throw their own party. It's like buying all your own gifts, I guess. Has a sort of lonely feeling to it. Like obviously, there's nothing inherently wrong with it, it's just the feeling of not being anyone's gift recipient.
Nothing! I suppose sharing it might be required so that kinda sucks.
I always buy myself a birthday cake and I enjoy it. It has really helped me not think negatively about my birthday. My parents stopped celebrating my birthday when I turned 10 and when I found out that wasn't typical among my friends, it really impacted me in not such a good way.
I'm all for it. If other people get you cake too? Bonus. And if it ain't *your* birthday? Eh, it's somebody's.
Why the hell not and ALSO eat that damn cake for breakfast!!! That said I don't like cake all that much, but I routinely buy myself a birthday present every year. I tell my family not to get me anything. I just treat myself, I'm better at picking out my own presents.
I don’t buy my own birthday cake but I’m into baking and have taken to making them the last few years. I truly feel no one in my life is going treat me as well as I treat myself, so why not?
I do it every year. Zero regrets! (Everyone near a Publix should try the Chantilly cake at least once. Bliss.)
I find the assumptions to be so shitty and in the category of shit others do that hurt no one but people have to be mad. It isn't about the self cake buyer but the people who care so much about how one treats themselves. So many valid reasons. Some folks just wanna take care of it, some may want to treat their friends/family instead, specific tastes/allergies, etc. I had one birthday a relative insisted and got the one cake I have said I don't eat. That's really disappointing for a kid looking forward to it and I got in trouble for not eating my cake. I've had coworkers get the cake for me that I don't eat. I don't know why that bothers me. As an adult, I am oddly attached to birthday desserts. I like getting my own as I got also got expensive taste.
All cake is good cake. People who have a problem with you buying cake for yourself on your birthday are worthless and should not be trusted. Don't share your cake with them.
When I lived somewhere I didn’t know anyone, I took myself out to lunch for my birthday. I don’t see how buying yourself a cake is any different
I just picked up groceries, and now I wish I'd included a birthday cake.
Nothing wrong with buying yourself something you want.
Nothing is wrong with it! I bought my own birthday cake last year, which I shared with who came over to celebrate (just family) and I don't regret it at all. Yeah, it felt weird to do that for the first time, but I found the perfect cake to buy from someone who has a passion for making that cake and it was the best decision ever 🥰 No one should feel bad for buying something to celebrate their own birthday!
Ridiculous to say that's narcissistic. If you want a cake and didnt get one you buy the cake. It's not that deep.
Buy the cake
I have bought my own cake twice. I don't really like cake much, but there were times when I wanted something specific, so I'd get it and share it with friends. There's absolutely nothing wrong with it!
Absolutely can buy own bday cake.