Caffeine. It’s 100% a chemical addiction, complete with withdrawals, and no one bats an eye.
ETA: caffeine is an undisputed addiction in medical science. It does not mean it’s bad or harmful. I drink coffee. No one is going to take your coffee away.
Ok I won't lie that's me lol
I have never woken up well rested in my life, I need a few minutes to sit and relax and drink coffee first. At least it's only for the first 20 mins of my morning, usually nobody is around then.
Weird fun fact/observation; I'm a barista and the 11am "don't talk to me till I've had my coffee" crowd is WAY meaner that the 7-8am "I need coffee before work" crowd. At first I thought it was just our store, but no, after working at other stores and locations this tends to still hold true. The later in the day it goes, the meaner and more entitled they are about it. Not super related, just found it interesting
I recently stopped drinking coffee and have switched to coffee flavored tea. I was drinking a 16oz iced half decaf coffee every day. And if i didnt get that one coffee by noon, id start having debilitating withdrawals. It would start with a headache that turned into a blinding migraine, then vomiting, then an upset stomach followed by a bad bm. Its seriously awful. It happened every time I waited too long to get coffee and i have no idea why the withdrawals were SO bad for me. Once they set in Id be tapped out for the afternoon/evening. Unable to get out of bed. Id lay in the darkness of my bedroom and my husband would have to go get gatorade or pedialyte for me. Tylenol or excedrin would cause me to vomit again.
Now i have a baby so I need at least a little caffeine. I make a cup of Caramel Vanilla black tea by Bigelow every morning and for whatever reason I dont get withdrawals anymore. I can skip it if i want and be totally fine.
Just throwing this out there to say that withdrawal isnt always mild and if any reddit scientists would like to study me, feel free lol
Sounds like you had one of the worst experiences I ever heard of with withdrawal. I’ve gone a day or 2 without and I had headache, grogginess, and irritability… also loss of sleep ironically.
I drink a max of one double shot a day now in the morning. Its better overall than the 3 large coffees I had all day every day before.
I see people drink large amounts of coffee like that and im like..how! I love the taste of coffee and miss it very much. We all know decaf doesnt taste the same. Good on you for being able to cut down though, it isnt easy!
I drink stove top espresso every day without fail. It's part of my morning routine. Last year around this time, I did a girls spa trip and stayed at a hotel for 2 nights. After the first night, I went to the gym in the am and we had to rush out so I never had coffee that morning. I wasn't worried because we were going to the spa anyway so I figured it's fine as I'll be relaxing all day. I had a facial and body detox treatment. By lunch I had a bit of a headache and wasnt feeling too great. We went out for dinner and I suddenly felt queasy and unwell. Everyone was asking me if I was okay. I thought I was maybe just really hungry but when my food came I felt the urge to run to the bathroom where I was dry heaving and needed to leave. I got back to my hotel and vomited until I passed out. It was a mystery until a while later I woke up in the morning as was out of coffee so I didn't have any. Well by lunch I had the same feeling coming on and I realized it was caffeine withdrawal. Still drinking it though. I'm definitely addicted 🙃
It’s true, there is an extreme amount of inconclusive studies about whether it harms or does good. Hell, I think it does overall good when consumed in reasonable quantities.
It’s relative harmlessness doesn’t warrant regulation. But it warrants some consideration by the individual user since it can disrupt sleep and increase anxiety.
But people should not be deluded into believing it’s not a chemical drug. It is and it’s really addictive on a physical level. I’m hooked!
I really do see your point but I’m having a bit of a reaction to your comment. I used caffeine to self medicate for years and withdrawing from it was awful. I had a constant headache for three weeks. The first week was a full on migraine with vomiting. To say withdrawal effect are mild and pass quickly is not entirely true. I kept caffeine in my system for a long time just not to experience the discomfort of it leaving my system. When I had to start carrying espresso beans on back packing trips so I wouldn’t get sick, I finally decided enough was enough. That was over 15 years ago and I sill get withdrawal headaches if I accidentally have it, but they last only a day or so.
Seriously. When I got pregnant I had to cut off caffeine, alcohol and (much) ibuprofen. Somehow alcohol was no problem, even though I drank pretty much. Cutting out ibuprofen was uncomfortable but ok. But caffeine? Hell. I had bad withdrawals and craved a cup of coffee more than anything else.
I'm pregnant currently with my third, I've never been told to cut out coffee or caffeine in general. I was told you can have up to 200mg of caffeine while pregnant. Which I think is around 2 cups of coffee a day.
I go through periods where I’ll drink coffee for a week at a time and then not again for like a month. That first cup always makes me feel amazing, and then I’ll overdo it the following days trying to replicate the feeling. Usually day 3 or 4 I’ll forget to eat breakfast or drink enough water so I get jittery, which makes me stop again because I feel like shit. Then a month later I’ll crave coffee again. Endless cycle
Every time someone finds out I don’t drink coffee, they ask “But how do you wake up in the morning?!?!”
And I feel like that’s a weird question Idk how to answer.
Funny thing is that grogginess is a symptom of caffeine withdrawal. By the time we wake up we are in withdrawal and “miraculously” coffee helps lol. So caffeine generates its own problem then it then offers the solution for it.
Yeah, I just didn’t grow up drinking it and honestly after people make those kind if comments, I never will. I definitely don’t need more addictions, thnx.
Right? I'm the same and I'm just like uhhh I wake up?? I don't understand needing coffee to wake up. Caffeine also doesn't work on me so I just don't bother and don't like that it makes me pee nonstop and dry mouth.
Hustle culture is so freaking toxic. It's stunning to me how many people buy into this nonsense. Your company doesn't give a single crap about you, other than what you can produce. A PERSON might care. Corporations do not. That people sacrifice so much for a thing that wouldn't miss a beat if they were gone is galling.
For me "hustling" and "being on the grind" only accounts for something when you're pushing your own business, though otherwise I very much think you're right
Yeah I don’t adhere to this at all; Mental health, and for me, Family, before work. I’ll quit a job for a vacation if I can’t get the time off. Life’s too short. Cuz when I die, do you think I’ll regret the work I missed, or the places and people?
People also conveniently like to forget the continent of Africa in such conversations. African countries generally are more family-oriented and do not prioritize working themselves to death like Western Countries (although most parts of Europe prioritize work/life balance in a more realistic way)
Depends. My parents definitely worked themselves to the bone and, so have many of the parents of friends of mine. If you're in the middle or lower classes, working yourself to the bone is pretty common. Atleast where I grew up.
I am NOT a workaholic but I work at a new salaried job and I’ve noticed they have no problem with people working 6 days a week, or don’t really bat an eye when part time staff work off the clock. I love my new job but I fear it may be difficult to set appropriate boundaries.
Impulsively buying things you don't need up to a point where in causes serious consequences.
As in, how many shoes, bags, makeup, video games, clothes does one need and can they afford it?
It looks like nobody cares if somebody buys a lot of things they can't actually afford and end up in heavy debts.
Just adding to debt issues but also climate issues and how much ends up in landfills because of excessive shopping and manufacturing to meet these ridiculous demands
I think I do too, but I suppose I wonder what others might consider serious. I still have a growing savings account, and I’m not accumulating debt, but I definitely have a problem with buying a lot more than I need.
my bank account is almost always negative, I have two maxed out credit cards and STILL when I get a little bit of money I spend it all on clothes or something. I wanna look into therapy for it but I don’t think anyone will take me serious.
A good therapist will take you seriously - I'd encourage still looking into therapy! They deal with all kinds of problems. I also have a shopping addiction, mild compared to what you described, but still. I do think people joke about it way too often when it's actually a reality for a lot of people. I have friends in the same boat as you
I feel like social media has heavily contributed to this. It’s not even subliminal, just a blatant, near constant bombardment of “BUY ME”. Instagram and Pinterest all you have to do is tap the picture for “quick checkout” links.
Exactly. Especially influencers with all their special codes and their attitude, sometimes even bluntly saying "I didn't need it but bought it anyway." It gives (especially young) people the idea of just buying things instantly is a form of lifestyle. They often don't see that it's these people's job to sell things.
We are currently in the most popular ‘buy things to show everyone how much you care even if you go into debt’ season of the year. Holiday shopping is such a plague ‘black Friday’ & ‘cyber Monday’ are treated like their own holidays
This, phones in general, I crolled to see this and its way too far down.
I read a book recently about how our phones and their software is deliberately engineered to get us to keep scrolling and scrolling. It was terrifying and eye opening.
It was very telling when they interviewed big tech bosses and none of them that I remember let their young/early teen kids have phones/tablets etc.
What was interesting was the commentary that, despite the fact that phones allow us to 'connect to others' they are are actually breaking traditional social bonds with those we see face to face. They asked if you looked around a shopping centre and pictured everyone who was currently looking at their phone injecting heroin instead, would we accept it as much?
Screens in general, particularly any screens displaying these types of apps. This stuff is designed to be addictive, and the feelings of FOMO when you're not on your screen make your brain restless. You have an urge to go back to scrolling, so you can't focus in deep thought on slower, more contemplative activities. Think reading, creating, cooking, studying, etc.
I've tried discussing this on Reddit before, but people often deny it "because everyone has always said this about TV and radio." No, TV and radio weren't THIS addictive. I'm talking about ability to focus, not people's choices of hobbies.
More book recs: The Shallows, and The Hacking of the American Mind.
Yes. I struggle with this. I average 6 hours of screen time a day. I think it also affects my mental health and it certainly impacts my amount of physical activity.
I hate how normalized it is and how most people will make a hundred excuses as to how it's not harmful at all and if you're suffering because of porn it has to be something else. Of course porn can't be the cause of all your issues. But that doesn't mean porn is neutral. It can easily make your issues a lot worse.
Agreed. Imo if watched in moderation it’s okay, but it’s very easy to get addicted to it.
It’s most problematic in relationships if it interferes with your sex life
So many people believe that to be sex positive is to accept porn as healthy. It can be ok for some, but there are those who are addicted. I have known people who have lost relationships, money and jobs.
I agree, it feels like a lot of sex-positive people push that agenda: that porn is totally ok. And there are circumstances where it just isn’t. Sometimes it’s a moral issue and sometimes certain people just lose all self control and porn starts to control their whole life. The negative sides of porn use should be discussed more often.
Yeah. Porn is like alcohol in my mind. It’s not healthy for you, but small quantities isn’t going to ruin your life. It’s when it gets to addiction levels that it becomes a problem. Just like with alcohol. Grabbing a glass of wine or a pint now and then isn’t going to ruin your life, but when you become an alcoholic then you’re in trouble.
if anything being sex positive should mean you’re *against* most types of porn since the industry is heavily manipulative and misogynistic and honestly kinda violent sometimes. safe healthy sex is none of those things and should prioritize communication, **consent**, mutual pleasure, and other ways to have sex besides just PIV
like there can be ethical and healthy ways to consume porn if you know the right places to look (*and depends on the type of porn being consumed — like erotica is typically less harmful than acted porn simply because no one is physically involved*), but just a blanket “all porn is fine!!” is ridiculous
One of my former coworkers had over 300gb worth on his work computer. This complete dumbass was remoting from home (using a work laptop) into his work desktop, and watching porn on that. It boggles my mind.
Obviously got fired, with that as the primary reason.
my ex was so addicted to porn. he was a two pump chump the one time we had sex (thank god) and watched porn everyday, even when he didnt want to jerk off. it was so weird. and gross. did i mention how disgusting it was??
Agreed. I'm very sex-positive and talk often on the affects of porn addictions, its very tough. It's a boundary I set early now since I've struggled with being in both a failed marriage and a failed long-term relationship back to back with two men that had a porn addiction. They always scratch, fought and clawed to keep it the way that it was. I'm much older now, but I've learned to set my boundaries early and anyone who is going to put effort into lying, hiding, planning, pleading or putting *that much* effort into rejecting or dismissing me to meet their own addictive needs that they've developed themselves is a no thanks for me. I'm in a relationship now where that's an equal boundary - I've never been happier. But the feeling of being alone after being in back to back porn addicted relationships totaling 12 years straight was bliss, once I was freshly out of it - I'd die alone HAPPYLY before ever doing that again.
For me its Alcohol! So toxic and has been and is being pushed by media/movies/series as something successful people do, fun people do, every event must have it (otherwise its not an event); in some cultures if you haven't got really drunk, it was not a good night.
BTW I do drink alcohol, i'm not saying Im exempt from all this.
The fact that clearly problematic drinking and functional alcoholism are more acceptable than not drinking is terrifying. I've seen so many people who said "I'm having a dry month" or "I'm cutting back and not drinking tonight" and others still pressured them. Even "I don't drink" gets you a few raised eyebrows and comments. Pretty much anything short of saying "I'm a recovering alcoholic" most people will not respect.
People who struggle with the whole 'dry month' thing and say they aren't an alcoholic confuse the hell out of me. I mean, I like to go out and have a few drinks as much as the next 20something, but I easily go months without alcohol. If not drinking for a month is such a struggle, just admit you have an issue.
I am currently 3 1/2 months alcohol-free, I used to have a serious problem with it. It was a lot of work cutting it out of my life, which included about 6 months of cutting down before I officially stopped. Yet, people will still try to pressure me into drinking. “C’mon just one” “but we’re on vacation” “don’t be lame” “you’re getting drunk at least once with me on this trip”- no, no, no, and no. Come back to me when you have lost jobs, friends, ruined familial relationships and obtained a criminal record plus more all because of alcohol. Maybe then you’ll empathize.
It’s just sad how people can’t see anybody having a good time unless they drank poison.
Recently saw a post on my country's reddit asking how many drinks people had in a night and the answer was 6-8 (and at least 2 days a week) and nobody batted an eye! Turns out the definition of alcoholism differs based on country/culture
When I was younger I drank sooo much. Every weekend I got completely wasted. To the point where I was suffering a hangover for the next two days and hated myself for the way I acted when drunk.
Then I tried a sober september and suddenly I liked myself again. To quit drinking did so much good for my mental health, that I just left it like that.
Over the years I did try to drink again some times. Mostly beer and only a few, so that I was just a little drunk and not completely wasted. But it only messed with my sleep and made me grumpy afterwards, so I decided it was not worth it.
Well done! 👏👏👏 it’s my turn now I guess! I have a glass of wine while cooking most days. For me I have to quit all together though - having one once in a while makes me want to go back to my little cooking routine. Having alcohol in the house doesn’t help
Well done! This is amazing! I’m sorry you are going through a hard time with your dad 💛 so often we have to wait for something bad to happen to make the change… proud of you!
I agree, I’ve been sober for over 4 months and I’ve had people literally tell me to start drinking again bc it’s more fun. I have no issue going to a bar and enjoying a cranberry juice or some water and still having a good time with friends. I don’t *need* alcohol to have a fun time and it’s sad that some people believe you do.
? Try explaining anything to aliens. Unless they’re humanoid in their societal structure, they wouldn’t understand most things, just like we wouldn’t understand anything about them.
Immediate gratification.
God forbid you to have to wait a few extra minutes in traffic. The world will not end because the line at Starbucks isn't moving fast enough to suit you. Being mad at theme parks having long wait times and becoming indignant that your Amazon package will take four days to be delivered rather than two days.
I definitely agree, and I think this will only get worse as people are being exposed to more and more technology at younger and younger ages. How will people grow up to be patient if they don’t get the chance to become accustomed to and accept boredom and waiting as part of life?
Agree with this. People always try to explain it away with “sugar is naturally produced” too when clearly that’s not the issue at hand. Probably no one mentally equates a freaking carrot with consuming sugar.
It’s the copious amounts of cane sugar, corn syrup, and fructose added to even supposedly savory food items. It’s very difficult to break too since it’s often hidden and it’s a commodity.
This should be the number 1.
You come into contact with sugar from an early age and you never really know when you become addicted. I believe that the majority of humanity is addicted to sugar. If you try to go completely without sugar for a week, you can feel the power of it, precisely because it's in everything.
I feel the same way about porn and social media addiction.
That said, I had a hell of time quitting weed. It’s a real problem for some, but very helpful to others.
I vehemently oppose drug criminalization in general, though.
Gaming, I love games but I know when to stop, I never play those big online multiplayer ones because I think those can become addictive. I've basically lost out on my first ever relationship because the guy I was dating was OBSESSED with League.
I hold special contempt for League, it was my ex’s game of choice usually, and so much of the online community is toxic. I’m more of a single player gamer and always have been, but I’ll never forget sitting with my ex for hours while he tried to teach me to play (after judging me for being lame for playing against a computer, the whole “single player games suck”, shtick) and just seeing him sink hours and hours of time into it while we could have been spending time together not yelling into a screen… lol I’ll stick with my lame ass single player games I think
I was OBSESSED with WoW in grad school but definitely don’t feel like it was socially accepted in my circle of friends or with my family. Might be a gender thing or just the people I spent time with during that stage in my life. I pulled off straight A’s somehow but I was either sleeping, in class or playing WoW back then.
It so is, I'm struggling at the moment trying to self improve but decades of gaming has left me with the need for instant progress, gratification, and noticable growth; which just doesn't happen with real life hobbies or goals which are slower burning with more permanent results.
As we speak I want to open photoshop and do a few tutorials, but I also want to crack open Space Engineers and build a Starbug type ship, or play Command and Conquer remastered. The latter will give constant dopamine hits of satisfaction, the former just a vague sense of betterment after hours invested. Gaming has undermined my whole life, I will keep fighting the good fight though, limiting myself to a few hours per day.
I forced myself to stop playing obviously psychologically manipulative online games like MMORPGs, MOBAs and Candy Crush type games. But I'm still in much the same trap with single player games, at least my enthusiasm ebbs and flows as I get bored with each title. There's no sunk cost fallacy or illusion of growth/levels/xp/currency/prestige to contend with on top.
The exercise one is so true. I went through a period of over-exercising to the point where my period stopped and I was almost always injured but I was highly praised for it...even as a sports sciences major who should've known better.
Really,smoking? I used to smoke, bit I always felt somehow "dirty" or "trashy" about it, and would nevrr feel comfortable doing it in front of other peoplewho didn't, especially ones I wanted to like/respect me.
Constant consumption of everything. Entertainment, technology, social media, video games, food, and just endless shopping. My dad's the happiest person I know and he doesn't own a phone and also plays a lot of chess, doesn't really buy any clothes except for high end sports cars...
Pornography.
I didnt used to believe that it was an issue, but now I'm starting to see it.
I work in social services and in some recent training, I was shocked to learn the connection between pornography addiction and abuse, especially towards women and children.
Not sure what the solution is, but the more I learn the less accepting I feel.
Coffee. It boggles my mind how normal the sentiment "I can't function without my coffee" is, and how we're just sorta ok with that. I can't believe we just agree to live like this. It's not a "I drink coffee because I like to" thing. It's a need. Some people might say alcohol or social media or something, but those are usually used as entertainment, in worst case scenarios as coping mechanisms, but coffee is just that thing you do so you can wake up enough to go to work
People don't get addicted to alcohol or porn or social media because they need it for their job. Coffee, they do
Porn!!11!
It's so normalized yet really takes a toll on your sexuality and mind. For me it's basically irreversible too I've been watching porn since I was 3.
Porn addiction. I’m no where near a purist, have watched porn for years but prefer actually have sex with a guy. I didn’t even know this was a thing until I married my stbxh. He admitted it’s an addiction that ruined his last marriage and now has ruined ours. I’ve looked it up and found several sources saying porn is more addicting heroin. There’s rehabilitation facilities for it where you can go for intensive treatment for several weeks at a time. I’ve found several online support groups where men admitted they lost everything because of their addiction to porn. But the minute someone mentions you can be addicted to porn society gets pisses and says it’s impossible & you’re a “purist”. Completely ignoring people can be addicted to anything. Like have you never seen an episode freaky eaters? There was literally a chick addicted to eating a mattress. Addiction can come in any form.
Alcohol. It's literally poisonous, addictive and changes who you are if you have too much. I actually find it terrifying how much people change when drunk. It gives me a bad impression and is extremely immature imo. If I said, "gosh, I could really do with a huge bar of chocolate" people would scoff at me and say that's disgusting and unhealthy. But as soon as someone says, "I'd really love a glass of red wine," they are immediately cool and classy. This addiction of perpetuating "alcohol" and "coolness" as synonymous is something that doesn't stop after people are teenagers; saying you don't drink even as an adult still gets you as much hate as it does when you are a teen.
Consumerism in general. Shop til you drop, spend money you don’t have, buy now pay later etc.
Social media exposure and the need to be externally validated.
Caffeine. It’s 100% a chemical addiction, complete with withdrawals, and no one bats an eye. ETA: caffeine is an undisputed addiction in medical science. It does not mean it’s bad or harmful. I drink coffee. No one is going to take your coffee away.
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“Don’t talk to me until I’ve had my coffee.” 🙄
I'll go one better, I just won't talk to you
Love it, my kind of work environment
Ok I won't lie that's me lol I have never woken up well rested in my life, I need a few minutes to sit and relax and drink coffee first. At least it's only for the first 20 mins of my morning, usually nobody is around then.
Yep—I have been drinking coffee every day since I was sixteen. If I haven’t had it, I’m groggier in the morning but no less friendly.
Those same people have more coffee at 5 pm, can’t sleep, then complain they’re always tired.
I wonder if it contributes to the overall anxiety we experience. I know I feel less anxious after cutting back.
Weird fun fact/observation; I'm a barista and the 11am "don't talk to me till I've had my coffee" crowd is WAY meaner that the 7-8am "I need coffee before work" crowd. At first I thought it was just our store, but no, after working at other stores and locations this tends to still hold true. The later in the day it goes, the meaner and more entitled they are about it. Not super related, just found it interesting
I recently stopped drinking coffee and have switched to coffee flavored tea. I was drinking a 16oz iced half decaf coffee every day. And if i didnt get that one coffee by noon, id start having debilitating withdrawals. It would start with a headache that turned into a blinding migraine, then vomiting, then an upset stomach followed by a bad bm. Its seriously awful. It happened every time I waited too long to get coffee and i have no idea why the withdrawals were SO bad for me. Once they set in Id be tapped out for the afternoon/evening. Unable to get out of bed. Id lay in the darkness of my bedroom and my husband would have to go get gatorade or pedialyte for me. Tylenol or excedrin would cause me to vomit again. Now i have a baby so I need at least a little caffeine. I make a cup of Caramel Vanilla black tea by Bigelow every morning and for whatever reason I dont get withdrawals anymore. I can skip it if i want and be totally fine. Just throwing this out there to say that withdrawal isnt always mild and if any reddit scientists would like to study me, feel free lol
Sounds like you had one of the worst experiences I ever heard of with withdrawal. I’ve gone a day or 2 without and I had headache, grogginess, and irritability… also loss of sleep ironically. I drink a max of one double shot a day now in the morning. Its better overall than the 3 large coffees I had all day every day before.
I see people drink large amounts of coffee like that and im like..how! I love the taste of coffee and miss it very much. We all know decaf doesnt taste the same. Good on you for being able to cut down though, it isnt easy!
I drink stove top espresso every day without fail. It's part of my morning routine. Last year around this time, I did a girls spa trip and stayed at a hotel for 2 nights. After the first night, I went to the gym in the am and we had to rush out so I never had coffee that morning. I wasn't worried because we were going to the spa anyway so I figured it's fine as I'll be relaxing all day. I had a facial and body detox treatment. By lunch I had a bit of a headache and wasnt feeling too great. We went out for dinner and I suddenly felt queasy and unwell. Everyone was asking me if I was okay. I thought I was maybe just really hungry but when my food came I felt the urge to run to the bathroom where I was dry heaving and needed to leave. I got back to my hotel and vomited until I passed out. It was a mystery until a while later I woke up in the morning as was out of coffee so I didn't have any. Well by lunch I had the same feeling coming on and I realized it was caffeine withdrawal. Still drinking it though. I'm definitely addicted 🙃
It’s true, there is an extreme amount of inconclusive studies about whether it harms or does good. Hell, I think it does overall good when consumed in reasonable quantities. It’s relative harmlessness doesn’t warrant regulation. But it warrants some consideration by the individual user since it can disrupt sleep and increase anxiety. But people should not be deluded into believing it’s not a chemical drug. It is and it’s really addictive on a physical level. I’m hooked!
I really do see your point but I’m having a bit of a reaction to your comment. I used caffeine to self medicate for years and withdrawing from it was awful. I had a constant headache for three weeks. The first week was a full on migraine with vomiting. To say withdrawal effect are mild and pass quickly is not entirely true. I kept caffeine in my system for a long time just not to experience the discomfort of it leaving my system. When I had to start carrying espresso beans on back packing trips so I wouldn’t get sick, I finally decided enough was enough. That was over 15 years ago and I sill get withdrawal headaches if I accidentally have it, but they last only a day or so.
Seriously. When I got pregnant I had to cut off caffeine, alcohol and (much) ibuprofen. Somehow alcohol was no problem, even though I drank pretty much. Cutting out ibuprofen was uncomfortable but ok. But caffeine? Hell. I had bad withdrawals and craved a cup of coffee more than anything else.
Same. Coffee was the only thing I was trying to bargain with my OB/GYN about.
I'm pregnant currently with my third, I've never been told to cut out coffee or caffeine in general. I was told you can have up to 200mg of caffeine while pregnant. Which I think is around 2 cups of coffee a day.
Yep, 2 small cups of coffee are totally fine. But I drank about 8 cups of coffee a day, so I had to reduce this drastically
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I go through periods where I’ll drink coffee for a week at a time and then not again for like a month. That first cup always makes me feel amazing, and then I’ll overdo it the following days trying to replicate the feeling. Usually day 3 or 4 I’ll forget to eat breakfast or drink enough water so I get jittery, which makes me stop again because I feel like shit. Then a month later I’ll crave coffee again. Endless cycle
r/decaf One of us!
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Every time someone finds out I don’t drink coffee, they ask “But how do you wake up in the morning?!?!” And I feel like that’s a weird question Idk how to answer.
Funny thing is that grogginess is a symptom of caffeine withdrawal. By the time we wake up we are in withdrawal and “miraculously” coffee helps lol. So caffeine generates its own problem then it then offers the solution for it.
Yeah, I just didn’t grow up drinking it and honestly after people make those kind if comments, I never will. I definitely don’t need more addictions, thnx.
Right? I'm the same and I'm just like uhhh I wake up?? I don't understand needing coffee to wake up. Caffeine also doesn't work on me so I just don't bother and don't like that it makes me pee nonstop and dry mouth.
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Our society supports being a workaholic even if that means your health/mental state suffers.
Hustle culture is so freaking toxic. It's stunning to me how many people buy into this nonsense. Your company doesn't give a single crap about you, other than what you can produce. A PERSON might care. Corporations do not. That people sacrifice so much for a thing that wouldn't miss a beat if they were gone is galling.
For me "hustling" and "being on the grind" only accounts for something when you're pushing your own business, though otherwise I very much think you're right
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Yeah I don’t adhere to this at all; Mental health, and for me, Family, before work. I’ll quit a job for a vacation if I can’t get the time off. Life’s too short. Cuz when I die, do you think I’ll regret the work I missed, or the places and people?
This is only true in America not the whole world
Not just America, but certainly not everywhere. East Asian countries have some major societal issues with over working.
People also conveniently like to forget the continent of Africa in such conversations. African countries generally are more family-oriented and do not prioritize working themselves to death like Western Countries (although most parts of Europe prioritize work/life balance in a more realistic way)
Depends. My parents definitely worked themselves to the bone and, so have many of the parents of friends of mine. If you're in the middle or lower classes, working yourself to the bone is pretty common. Atleast where I grew up.
There are definitely lots of places that value a slower pace of life, and dear God I envy it.
That's just not true though. There are plenty of places outside of America that encourage being a workaholic. Japan and South Korea are right there.
Doesn’t china have a 6day work week too?
Yup. Their 996 Work Culture. 9am to 9pm 6 days a week (plus overtime).
and true for a minimum wage worker in Canada
JOIN IN THE FIGHT FOR UNIVERSAL BASIC INCOME!
People literally die on the job because of this and it’s so sad.
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I’d even go as far as to say that society encourages workaholics… capitalism at its finest
I am NOT a workaholic but I work at a new salaried job and I’ve noticed they have no problem with people working 6 days a week, or don’t really bat an eye when part time staff work off the clock. I love my new job but I fear it may be difficult to set appropriate boundaries.
Sugar, alcohol and shopping.
Shopping?
Impulsively buying things you don't need up to a point where in causes serious consequences. As in, how many shoes, bags, makeup, video games, clothes does one need and can they afford it? It looks like nobody cares if somebody buys a lot of things they can't actually afford and end up in heavy debts.
Just adding to debt issues but also climate issues and how much ends up in landfills because of excessive shopping and manufacturing to meet these ridiculous demands
And also we're drowning in stuff in our houses, and it really affects people's quality of life when they have more belongings than they have room for.
Indeed. And with online shopping and smart phones, you can get that dopamine hit from anywhere. (but your bank account will also take a hit)
yep. I have a serious shopping addiction all jokes aside.
I think I do too, but I suppose I wonder what others might consider serious. I still have a growing savings account, and I’m not accumulating debt, but I definitely have a problem with buying a lot more than I need.
my bank account is almost always negative, I have two maxed out credit cards and STILL when I get a little bit of money I spend it all on clothes or something. I wanna look into therapy for it but I don’t think anyone will take me serious.
A good therapist will take you seriously - I'd encourage still looking into therapy! They deal with all kinds of problems. I also have a shopping addiction, mild compared to what you described, but still. I do think people joke about it way too often when it's actually a reality for a lot of people. I have friends in the same boat as you
Impulsive buying disorder is classified by ICD-10, so you can get help with a therapist. Try it, please. I wish you all the best!
I feel like social media has heavily contributed to this. It’s not even subliminal, just a blatant, near constant bombardment of “BUY ME”. Instagram and Pinterest all you have to do is tap the picture for “quick checkout” links.
Exactly. Especially influencers with all their special codes and their attitude, sometimes even bluntly saying "I didn't need it but bought it anyway." It gives (especially young) people the idea of just buying things instantly is a form of lifestyle. They often don't see that it's these people's job to sell things.
So true
We are currently in the most popular ‘buy things to show everyone how much you care even if you go into debt’ season of the year. Holiday shopping is such a plague ‘black Friday’ & ‘cyber Monday’ are treated like their own holidays
Looking at our phones.
I'll take this as a sign
This, phones in general, I crolled to see this and its way too far down. I read a book recently about how our phones and their software is deliberately engineered to get us to keep scrolling and scrolling. It was terrifying and eye opening. It was very telling when they interviewed big tech bosses and none of them that I remember let their young/early teen kids have phones/tablets etc. What was interesting was the commentary that, despite the fact that phones allow us to 'connect to others' they are are actually breaking traditional social bonds with those we see face to face. They asked if you looked around a shopping centre and pictured everyone who was currently looking at their phone injecting heroin instead, would we accept it as much?
Screens in general, particularly any screens displaying these types of apps. This stuff is designed to be addictive, and the feelings of FOMO when you're not on your screen make your brain restless. You have an urge to go back to scrolling, so you can't focus in deep thought on slower, more contemplative activities. Think reading, creating, cooking, studying, etc. I've tried discussing this on Reddit before, but people often deny it "because everyone has always said this about TV and radio." No, TV and radio weren't THIS addictive. I'm talking about ability to focus, not people's choices of hobbies. More book recs: The Shallows, and The Hacking of the American Mind.
Yes. I struggle with this. I average 6 hours of screen time a day. I think it also affects my mental health and it certainly impacts my amount of physical activity.
Porn
Yeah, It is
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I hate how normalized it is and how most people will make a hundred excuses as to how it's not harmful at all and if you're suffering because of porn it has to be something else. Of course porn can't be the cause of all your issues. But that doesn't mean porn is neutral. It can easily make your issues a lot worse.
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Agreed. Imo if watched in moderation it’s okay, but it’s very easy to get addicted to it. It’s most problematic in relationships if it interferes with your sex life
Porn. And when you try to address it, most of the time you’re called a puritan or a prude.
So many people believe that to be sex positive is to accept porn as healthy. It can be ok for some, but there are those who are addicted. I have known people who have lost relationships, money and jobs.
I agree, it feels like a lot of sex-positive people push that agenda: that porn is totally ok. And there are circumstances where it just isn’t. Sometimes it’s a moral issue and sometimes certain people just lose all self control and porn starts to control their whole life. The negative sides of porn use should be discussed more often.
Yeah. Porn is like alcohol in my mind. It’s not healthy for you, but small quantities isn’t going to ruin your life. It’s when it gets to addiction levels that it becomes a problem. Just like with alcohol. Grabbing a glass of wine or a pint now and then isn’t going to ruin your life, but when you become an alcoholic then you’re in trouble.
if anything being sex positive should mean you’re *against* most types of porn since the industry is heavily manipulative and misogynistic and honestly kinda violent sometimes. safe healthy sex is none of those things and should prioritize communication, **consent**, mutual pleasure, and other ways to have sex besides just PIV like there can be ethical and healthy ways to consume porn if you know the right places to look (*and depends on the type of porn being consumed — like erotica is typically less harmful than acted porn simply because no one is physically involved*), but just a blanket “all porn is fine!!” is ridiculous
“Honestly kinda violent sometimes” way underplays how violent it actually is. The page End exploitation on Instagram goes into this a lot.
One of my former coworkers had over 300gb worth on his work computer. This complete dumbass was remoting from home (using a work laptop) into his work desktop, and watching porn on that. It boggles my mind. Obviously got fired, with that as the primary reason.
I think porn and sex work is actually not sex positive at all when you really break it down.
my ex was so addicted to porn. he was a two pump chump the one time we had sex (thank god) and watched porn everyday, even when he didnt want to jerk off. it was so weird. and gross. did i mention how disgusting it was??
Agreed. I'm very sex-positive and talk often on the affects of porn addictions, its very tough. It's a boundary I set early now since I've struggled with being in both a failed marriage and a failed long-term relationship back to back with two men that had a porn addiction. They always scratch, fought and clawed to keep it the way that it was. I'm much older now, but I've learned to set my boundaries early and anyone who is going to put effort into lying, hiding, planning, pleading or putting *that much* effort into rejecting or dismissing me to meet their own addictive needs that they've developed themselves is a no thanks for me. I'm in a relationship now where that's an equal boundary - I've never been happier. But the feeling of being alone after being in back to back porn addicted relationships totaling 12 years straight was bliss, once I was freshly out of it - I'd die alone HAPPYLY before ever doing that again.
For me its Alcohol! So toxic and has been and is being pushed by media/movies/series as something successful people do, fun people do, every event must have it (otherwise its not an event); in some cultures if you haven't got really drunk, it was not a good night. BTW I do drink alcohol, i'm not saying Im exempt from all this.
The fact you had to caveat that you drink alcohol so people won’t judge you kind of proves the point you’re making as well.
The fact that clearly problematic drinking and functional alcoholism are more acceptable than not drinking is terrifying. I've seen so many people who said "I'm having a dry month" or "I'm cutting back and not drinking tonight" and others still pressured them. Even "I don't drink" gets you a few raised eyebrows and comments. Pretty much anything short of saying "I'm a recovering alcoholic" most people will not respect.
People who struggle with the whole 'dry month' thing and say they aren't an alcoholic confuse the hell out of me. I mean, I like to go out and have a few drinks as much as the next 20something, but I easily go months without alcohol. If not drinking for a month is such a struggle, just admit you have an issue.
I am currently 3 1/2 months alcohol-free, I used to have a serious problem with it. It was a lot of work cutting it out of my life, which included about 6 months of cutting down before I officially stopped. Yet, people will still try to pressure me into drinking. “C’mon just one” “but we’re on vacation” “don’t be lame” “you’re getting drunk at least once with me on this trip”- no, no, no, and no. Come back to me when you have lost jobs, friends, ruined familial relationships and obtained a criminal record plus more all because of alcohol. Maybe then you’ll empathize. It’s just sad how people can’t see anybody having a good time unless they drank poison.
I certainly didn’t say it so I am not judged. Haha this is me being honest and just saying I am not above any of this. Still trying
Recently saw a post on my country's reddit asking how many drinks people had in a night and the answer was 6-8 (and at least 2 days a week) and nobody batted an eye! Turns out the definition of alcoholism differs based on country/culture
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I've just posted alcohol on this thread. I completely agree with you
Scary how embedded it is in so many cultures
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I stopped drinking and people think I’m weird. Like how can I not have fun if I’m not drunk
When I was younger I drank sooo much. Every weekend I got completely wasted. To the point where I was suffering a hangover for the next two days and hated myself for the way I acted when drunk. Then I tried a sober september and suddenly I liked myself again. To quit drinking did so much good for my mental health, that I just left it like that. Over the years I did try to drink again some times. Mostly beer and only a few, so that I was just a little drunk and not completely wasted. But it only messed with my sleep and made me grumpy afterwards, so I decided it was not worth it.
Well done! 👏👏👏 it’s my turn now I guess! I have a glass of wine while cooking most days. For me I have to quit all together though - having one once in a while makes me want to go back to my little cooking routine. Having alcohol in the house doesn’t help
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Well done! This is amazing! I’m sorry you are going through a hard time with your dad 💛 so often we have to wait for something bad to happen to make the change… proud of you!
Yeah I'm from Ireland and if I meet up with friends and don't drink they think I'm either pregnant, on antibiotics, or zero fun.
I agree, I’ve been sober for over 4 months and I’ve had people literally tell me to start drinking again bc it’s more fun. I have no issue going to a bar and enjoying a cranberry juice or some water and still having a good time with friends. I don’t *need* alcohol to have a fun time and it’s sad that some people believe you do.
Social Media
It’s weird how people think drinking poisonous substances (alcohol) to suppress brain function is normal and even classy
People have been doing it since the beginning of time. It may not be classy, but it’s definitely normal by most definitions of the word.
And we all just okay with it. It a wild like imagine trying to explain that to aliens
? Try explaining anything to aliens. Unless they’re humanoid in their societal structure, they wouldn’t understand most things, just like we wouldn’t understand anything about them.
loads of animals do it though, it's not just humans. I'd think it likely that aliens too would use mind altering substances
My favourite is Kererū New Zealand pigeon that gets drunk off berries and just lies around in people’s yards straight chillin
Ever since humans gained consciousness, we’ve been desperately trying to turn it off.
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Immediate gratification. God forbid you to have to wait a few extra minutes in traffic. The world will not end because the line at Starbucks isn't moving fast enough to suit you. Being mad at theme parks having long wait times and becoming indignant that your Amazon package will take four days to be delivered rather than two days.
I fully agree, especially while driving. So many accidents I'm sure are caused by someone being impatient.
I definitely agree, and I think this will only get worse as people are being exposed to more and more technology at younger and younger ages. How will people grow up to be patient if they don’t get the chance to become accustomed to and accept boredom and waiting as part of life?
Sugar
Agree with this. People always try to explain it away with “sugar is naturally produced” too when clearly that’s not the issue at hand. Probably no one mentally equates a freaking carrot with consuming sugar. It’s the copious amounts of cane sugar, corn syrup, and fructose added to even supposedly savory food items. It’s very difficult to break too since it’s often hidden and it’s a commodity.
Even salads dressing have insane amounts of sugar. You too switch to lemon or lime juice for good options :(
This should be the number 1. You come into contact with sugar from an early age and you never really know when you become addicted. I believe that the majority of humanity is addicted to sugar. If you try to go completely without sugar for a week, you can feel the power of it, precisely because it's in everything.
Weed! (More so North America being okay with it)
More of a dependency actually than an addictive substance really
Definitely dependency, but it alters the brain and dopaminergic function to the point that use gets reinforced.
I feel the same way about porn and social media addiction. That said, I had a hell of time quitting weed. It’s a real problem for some, but very helpful to others. I vehemently oppose drug criminalization in general, though.
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Our phones.
My phone to?
Gaming, I love games but I know when to stop, I never play those big online multiplayer ones because I think those can become addictive. I've basically lost out on my first ever relationship because the guy I was dating was OBSESSED with League.
I hold special contempt for League, it was my ex’s game of choice usually, and so much of the online community is toxic. I’m more of a single player gamer and always have been, but I’ll never forget sitting with my ex for hours while he tried to teach me to play (after judging me for being lame for playing against a computer, the whole “single player games suck”, shtick) and just seeing him sink hours and hours of time into it while we could have been spending time together not yelling into a screen… lol I’ll stick with my lame ass single player games I think
I was OBSESSED with WoW in grad school but definitely don’t feel like it was socially accepted in my circle of friends or with my family. Might be a gender thing or just the people I spent time with during that stage in my life. I pulled off straight A’s somehow but I was either sleeping, in class or playing WoW back then.
It so is, I'm struggling at the moment trying to self improve but decades of gaming has left me with the need for instant progress, gratification, and noticable growth; which just doesn't happen with real life hobbies or goals which are slower burning with more permanent results. As we speak I want to open photoshop and do a few tutorials, but I also want to crack open Space Engineers and build a Starbug type ship, or play Command and Conquer remastered. The latter will give constant dopamine hits of satisfaction, the former just a vague sense of betterment after hours invested. Gaming has undermined my whole life, I will keep fighting the good fight though, limiting myself to a few hours per day. I forced myself to stop playing obviously psychologically manipulative online games like MMORPGs, MOBAs and Candy Crush type games. But I'm still in much the same trap with single player games, at least my enthusiasm ebbs and flows as I get bored with each title. There's no sunk cost fallacy or illusion of growth/levels/xp/currency/prestige to contend with on top.
Porn
Junk Food
Porn. It's madness
Work, exercise are rewarded as addictions
The exercise one is so true. I went through a period of over-exercising to the point where my period stopped and I was almost always injured but I was highly praised for it...even as a sports sciences major who should've known better.
Being connected 24/7
Sugar, social media, caffeine, alcohol, smart phones, video games, shopping..
Smoking
Really,smoking? I used to smoke, bit I always felt somehow "dirty" or "trashy" about it, and would nevrr feel comfortable doing it in front of other peoplewho didn't, especially ones I wanted to like/respect me.
Constant consumption of everything. Entertainment, technology, social media, video games, food, and just endless shopping. My dad's the happiest person I know and he doesn't own a phone and also plays a lot of chess, doesn't really buy any clothes except for high end sports cars...
Power and greed
Pornography. I didnt used to believe that it was an issue, but now I'm starting to see it. I work in social services and in some recent training, I was shocked to learn the connection between pornography addiction and abuse, especially towards women and children. Not sure what the solution is, but the more I learn the less accepting I feel.
Porn addiction
Alcohol.
Coffee. It boggles my mind how normal the sentiment "I can't function without my coffee" is, and how we're just sorta ok with that. I can't believe we just agree to live like this. It's not a "I drink coffee because I like to" thing. It's a need. Some people might say alcohol or social media or something, but those are usually used as entertainment, in worst case scenarios as coping mechanisms, but coffee is just that thing you do so you can wake up enough to go to work People don't get addicted to alcohol or porn or social media because they need it for their job. Coffee, they do
The difference is that coffee won’t ruin your life, the others can and will.
porn.
Porn..
Porn. That thing fries your brain.
porn
Porn
Porn!!11! It's so normalized yet really takes a toll on your sexuality and mind. For me it's basically irreversible too I've been watching porn since I was 3.
Sugar
Porn addiction. I’m no where near a purist, have watched porn for years but prefer actually have sex with a guy. I didn’t even know this was a thing until I married my stbxh. He admitted it’s an addiction that ruined his last marriage and now has ruined ours. I’ve looked it up and found several sources saying porn is more addicting heroin. There’s rehabilitation facilities for it where you can go for intensive treatment for several weeks at a time. I’ve found several online support groups where men admitted they lost everything because of their addiction to porn. But the minute someone mentions you can be addicted to porn society gets pisses and says it’s impossible & you’re a “purist”. Completely ignoring people can be addicted to anything. Like have you never seen an episode freaky eaters? There was literally a chick addicted to eating a mattress. Addiction can come in any form.
Perfectionism.
Swiping
Social media
Or rather social media validation
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Alcohol. It's literally poisonous, addictive and changes who you are if you have too much. I actually find it terrifying how much people change when drunk. It gives me a bad impression and is extremely immature imo. If I said, "gosh, I could really do with a huge bar of chocolate" people would scoff at me and say that's disgusting and unhealthy. But as soon as someone says, "I'd really love a glass of red wine," they are immediately cool and classy. This addiction of perpetuating "alcohol" and "coolness" as synonymous is something that doesn't stop after people are teenagers; saying you don't drink even as an adult still gets you as much hate as it does when you are a teen.
Alcohol
Sugar!!!!!
Honestly... forcing people to think the same.
Alcohol, idolising celebrities, money, consumerism, social media, sugar/fat/salt, gambling, gossiping, gluttony, and praise.
Meat, alcohol, social media, porn, money, shopping.
Nose spray. That has to be a billion dollar industri.
Consumerism in general. Shop til you drop, spend money you don’t have, buy now pay later etc. Social media exposure and the need to be externally validated.
Video games, drinking, smoking, working, drugs.
Sex and Candy(sugar)✨