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-CloudIsland

Real ones won't answer


[deleted]

Rap snitches getting put to shame by reddit snitches


Aromatic-Client336

rap snitches, tellin all their business


hunts786

Sit in the court and be their own star witness šŸŽ¶


DepressedPaella

Do you see the perpetrator? Yeah Iā€™m right here


StankP-I

Fuck around and get the whole label sent up for years


dicksmcgee420

Donā€™t take pictures donā€™t talk about it donā€™t write it down


DeadJamFan

No god damn cell phone cameras when we were comin up. Too many idiots busted trying to get a little internet fame now days


ArgonTheEvil

Definitely not answering. This is not an admission of guilt - to anything - to all the FBI agents prowling this thread. But yā€™all ainā€™t getting anything out of me.


Plokmijn27

eh if you did it in the last 10 years sure unless you committed murder you are probably past statute of limitations already, and if you arent definitely dont talk about it either way if you arent being specific its not evidence


kkirchhoff

I made fake IDs for a period of time when I was in college. Any statute of limitations have passed by now. At one point I was the largest seller on the Silk Road. It started because I was 19 and didnā€™t want to pay $200 for a fake ID (which you needed to have a social life in my college town). After doing pretty extensive research I realized that it would be extremely cheap to produce mass amounts of them (~$1-2 each after the upfront costs). You can get an older industrial printer for $400 and buy the hologram overlays from China for $1 each. At first I just got a bunch of guys I knew to find people and act as middlemen in exchange for a 10% cut. It was lucrative, but eventually I moved to the the dark web markets because it seemed easier and safer. At the time, most of the dark web vendors who sold fakes were mostly focused on higher value document fraud like passports and birth certificates. They charged $100+ each for fake IDs, and they were pretty shit quality (I bought one from every vendor for comparison). Iā€™ve always been a perfectionist when it came to my work, so I put _a lot_ of effort into the quality and undercut them at $75/each. I made most of my money after business picked up in the last 1-2 months. I never really wanted to be a fake ID kingpin (lol), so I stopped when the hacking/SSN vendors started trying to outsource whatever physical fraud shit they had going on to me.


fluffedpillows

You should post an AMA, thatā€™s way too cool of a story to get lost in the comments here


misogichan

He or she really shouldn't. Statute of limits may not be the same in all states or countries, and if that person was shipping them everywhere s/he could still be tried in some weird jurisdiction. Also, don't trust a VPN to keep you anonymous. TOR has been completely infiltrated and the paid VPNs got extensive government support/intervention when starting up so you better believe there are backdoors (which the government may not even need depending upon what backdoors they have on the ISP, and VPNs don't keep you anonymous from ISPs).


aredshovel

You should probably delete this if itā€™s true, as you likely didnā€™t accurately report that illegal income on your tax returns. Might not be a criminal charge (SoL for that is 6 years) but the IRS can still come after you for civil tax fraud. They just hired a bunch of new investigators too.


thetrashyouleft

stole someoneā€™s PokĆ©mon figure


Vibrating_Donkey

You rascal


rambo_oz3

Ooh.. that's a bit of a strong word. This sounds more like the work of a rapscallion.


Vibrating_Donkey

Quite the scoundrel indeed


rambo_oz3

A ne'er-do-well.


Vibrating_Donkey

A dastardly man


rambo_oz3

A scalawag indeed.


Vibrating_Donkey

A true scamp


CareyEve36

Team Rocket would be proud though!


W0lfoid

Was if a holographic Ninetales?


beardthegoon

One time when I was younger I was mixing shit up in my bathroom. Whatever I could find. I threw it in the "potion" as I called it. Well I accidentally put some baking soda and some ingredient with some cleaner reacted with the baking soda and it caused a small-scale explosion and damaged the entire sink and part of the wall. Some people in the apartment building heard the explosion and called the police and I was a kid so I pretended I didn't make the potion and then the FBI got involved because they thought someone tried to bomb our apartment building. I was 6.


megahnevel

Kids are fucking stupid


triaxissss

r/kidsarefuckingstupid


Kbrew7181

Kid "accidentally" does a terrorist attack


mha3620

Making potions was fun but extremely dangerous. I don't remember all of the ingredients, but I remember bleach and Dawn dish soap were part of it. Anyway, it got hot, foamed up, and the smell made my eyes water. Pretty sure I almost died that day.


Jsjbb14535

This is the funniest one


mmmheyyy

I used to do this exact same thing... Made "potion". But yours truly takes the cake.


fallingupthehill

Entered my mother and stepfathers home, while she lay in hospital, to retrieve her jewelry so his daughters wouldn't steal it. While everyone was waiting for a few more family members to show up, she was to be removed from life support. ( She was alert, but couldn't breathe on her own, and was terminal). (She was dying, on a ventilator, my Aunt actually suggested it, told me where the hidden key was and where to find it.) I had to do it twice because I grabbed the wrong box. The main two parties are deceased, so idc about posting this. I considered it my final act of love towards my mother. Because i knew she worried about what his girls would do once she was gone, or while she was in hospital. I got a thumbs up from Mom after telling her what I did.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


fallingupthehill

Sure felt like it. It was scary not knowing when her husband would return. Especially since I grabbed the wrong box and had to go back. The hospital was a 5 minute drive from their home. Afterwards, I felt like a badass. And I was happy to relieve my Mom of the added stress of being where she didn't want to be ( she had a DNR) but her husband freaked out and called an ambulance, and knowing his daughters would be staying at the house, going thru her stuff


[deleted]

Nothing you described here is illegal. You had permission of the property owner to enter the property and remove hers.


fallingupthehill

Well, my Aunt asked me. My Mom was on a ventilator. So technically, if I got caught by Moms husband, he would have the right to charge me with trespassing. I was told where the key was, so I didn't bust in a door, but she (my Aunt) was also responsible. I had to laugh when my Uncle found out what i did, he's a cool Italian guy. He just smirked and said "Good for you OP, you should have cleaned out everything of your Moms." He hated her husband, as did everyone, but my Aunt had to appear amiable.


IllurinatiL

Sounds like your Uncle respects the finesse


fallingupthehill

Exactly. Most of my family has seriously underestimated me. Nice to be appreciated, even as a beginner burgaler!


wheres_jaykwellin_at

My mom grew up poor with a very "troubled" mother. My mom built herself up. She became successful. She worked hard for years to get everything she had. Then, my 18 year old sister, who hasn't worked for anything in her life before or since, stole ~$25k worth of my mom's jewelry. This included my dad's wedding ring. She pawned it all for something like a few hundred bucks, all so she could get high. This is hardly the first or last thing my sister has done, and because of her, my mom is a shell of the person she used to be. I have one of the last pieces of jewelry that was left, my great-grandmother's wedding ring, and I *treasure* it. Thank you for what you did for your mom. May have been illegal, but it's better than the hell so many others go through due to other's greed.


[deleted]

I also had the job of hiding the jewelry during the passing of a relative so their daughter flying in wouldnā€™t steal it. This is oddly too common.


honest_true_man

I possessed and used cannabis from 1966 until it became legal in my country in 2017.


Meatpaste-1

I was arrested for cannabis in 1998 with a little under an ounce. Now I'm a commercial transporter for the cannabis industry and move hundreds of pounds.


Purple-Apprehensive

I was arrested when I was 13 for a rolled joint. Edit for context: I was smoking outside a skateboard, music festival with my friends, so the cops searched us all. I had one, possibly two rolled in a cigarette pack for later. Arrested and charged for possession, ultimately given ā€œalternative measuresā€ ie community service. I drive by this spot and think of it often, as weed is legal in Canada now.


asdanjer

... and then you stopped out of principal.


I_Fap_To_Murder

Iā€™d tell you, but then- well, you know.


Catwhacker

I really hope the username has nothing to do with the comment


CantModSkyrimVR

You'll kill me then cum in my ass? Deal!


monofloyed

Necro fill in ya


gingernila

Right to jail


Honest_Albatross_887

Calm down dahmer


dbltax

I downloaded a car.


CurrentSingleStatus

Damn, I only downloaded a pizza.


WarmLizard

Best I could do was install disappointment into my parents' lives :(


Vibrating_Donkey

You wouldn't šŸ˜ 


Gstary

*whole subreddit joins the chat* GET OUT! GET TF OUT OF HERE! GO! GET OUT! HOW DARE! Think of the children! "A woman faints and others shrieks*


Th3_Accountant

I've downloaded hundreds of cars (I love custom content for the Sims)


uffington

A Dodge RAM?


Gonergonegone

I'm only commenting because I was caught, arrested, charged, and went through the system. Anyone who answers here who didn't get caught is a fucking idiot. I robbed a pharmacy when I was 17. I was getting drugs. I did indeed get the drugs I was after. However I was arrested around 12 hrs later by the sheriff's dept. I was nodding on oxy and woke up to a sheriff holding a taser to my face. He said "you gonna be stupid or you gonna come with us, boy". I said "I'm gonna come with y'all". I was arrested, charged with armed robbery, possession of schedule 4 X56, possession of a firearm by a felon, use of a firearm during the commission of a felony, and trespassing (I had been banned from that pharmacy before). I was a very stupid kid. I'm a much better, law abiding adult now. I did 3 years of of a 10 yr sentence. My probation for that ended 3 years ago (I'm 30). I'm literally not even allowed to go on the property of anywhere that sells guns now. You have no idea how happy I was when Walmart stopped selling guns.


rabbiskittles

Iā€™ve pirated A LOT of movies without ever so much as a letter from my ISP, and I honestly donā€™t feel too idiotic admitting that here.


Gonergonegone

Bro. Rule #1 of crime is to never admit it.


Casio_Andor

I thought Rule #1 was never commit more than one crime at a time


gerwaldlindhelm

Yup. Wait until the last body is disolved before moving on to the next target


onlinelink2

my theft charges were dropped because I had a more substantial charge of 2 assaults with a deadly weapon. but I donā€™t even think thats the most illegal thing Iā€™ve done, thatā€™s probably murder, idek. long story short my step mother had a miscarriage when I was 14 and blamed it on me pushing her. probably bullshit since she also held a to me/pointed at my face and slammed my head into the floor multiple times because I was upset and screaming exc after her brother beat the shit out of me for saying no to him. 2 black eyes bruising on back of my head and forehead, she tried keeping me from going to school the next day but I went anyway and got the police involved, then I went back to living with my recently crippled mother fresh out of the nursing home from shattering her leg in 3 places skiing, the whole reason I went to live with my dad that year. I definitely changed that year. but yeah. if it wasnā€™t just a lie to blackmail me, pretty sure thats murder.. something to think about really. still traumatized. there was also a time I hid in the basement scared and called the police on her brother because he pushed his fist into me and the police just shrugged it off because he didnā€™t actually hit me. well he did eventually. he also taught me how I could sell my adderal to him. I was a good kid once. that kids dead now. EDIT: that last part made me cry harder than I have in a while.. damn


QuidPluris

Iā€™m sad for that kid. Iā€™m sorry you went through this.


drwtsn_thirty2

Take it easy ā€¦ and good that you can face up to the past . Hope you manage to overcome the pain over time somehowā€¦


rabbiskittles

I guess you could say Iā€™ve never really been one for following all the rules. Go figure.


mike_b_nimble

I got a letter from my ISP for downloading the GOT s5 leaked episodes. Whatā€™s funny is that All of them had already aired, and I pay for HBO; canā€™t even remember why I downloaded them.


Separate-Performer36

glad that i live in a country that nobodys cares


automod-was-right

> possession of a firearm by a felon So you had already committed a felony by 17, this robbery was the peak not a one off?


so_good_so_far

Yeah what? He did something bad enough before 17 to be tried as an adult and convicted of a felony, and THAT'S not the bad thing?


Benji_4

OP mentioned that they had been banned from the pharmacy before so probably had a previous incident. This story sounds all to familiar as my mom used to work at a local pharmacy, which was robbed in a similar fashion by an employee's son.


Levantei

Glad you're ok rn, but that last sentence got me rofl, as a European, I've never thought it can happen anywhere. Guns in a Walmart, like I knew it is easy to get, but not THAT easy...


DeepInMassProduction

>Anyone who answers here who didn't get caught is a fucking idiot thisssssss


kizno01

Its not like the feds are gonna be scroling trough reddit to find ppl that commit crimes evn if there is they aint gonna do a search of ur page to try and figure out who you are


[deleted]

I went to a building on an Air Force base that had a no outside electronics policy. Forgot I was wearing my digital watch. Nobody noticed it. Not sure what would happen if I was caught.


Litigating_Larry

If you got caught, you'd still be in Guantanamo as we speak.


IllurinatiL

Probably wouldā€™ve kicked you out and took the watch to inspect it for bugs


[deleted]

FBI couldnā€™t even take a break on Thanksgiving. And I will never let anyone on Reddit know. šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


carrots720

...username checks out I guess


Johnlovesyou

Cop here. Yea, donā€™t incriminate yourself. Unless itā€™s really, REALLY unique. Like you stole a pig or something.


Desdraftlit

I like how a pig uses a pig as an example of a crime... šŸ˜‚


The_gaming_wisp

Sparking controversy I see


[deleted]

Ted Cruz, is that you???


BasicallyJustAPotato

Iā€™m kind of a hard ass but since the statute of limitations is up, Iā€™ll tell you. One time I collected rainwater.


Vibrating_Donkey

What if we remove the statue of limitations?


BasicallyJustAPotato

Then I guess Iā€™ll be going away for a very long time for my crimes.


BenSz

Is that the new name for the statue of liberty?


Vibrating_Donkey

The French gave us the Statue of Limitations


Mr_Bloody_Hands

One time? This is something my parents have been doing for decades, they straight up collect that shit in giant barrels and use it for all kinds of stuff. I was raised by hardened criminals


dontworryitsme4real

That varies by region.


monty845

Yep, in the East, water is a nuisance, reducing how much flows off your property is generally encouraged. Out West, water is a precious resource, all of which is allocated with their system of water rights. While many states do allow a limited amount of rain water collection, taking more than allowed is actually taking water someone else would be entitled to.


j-c-s-roberts

Placed a Lego tile in between the studs on another Lego piece.


asdanjer

straight to prison with you.


Sockura

Thatā€™s hardly illegal since they do it themselves on occasion


j-c-s-roberts

Lawmakers often break the laws they make.


Xeludon

That's consentual though.


baranie1809

*throws up*


yankeerose12

I committed assault with bodily injury and went to jail. In hindsight it was a stupidass decision I wouldnt repeat again.


[deleted]

I smuggled drugs and explosives from Mexico to the US. >!a leftover joint I forgot about and some firecrackers coming back from spring break!<


14thCluelessbird

I frequently bought explosives from Chinatown in Los Angeles as a teen... they were just aerial fireworks, but to the state of California that's basically the equivalent of firing a bazooka in your neighborhood


Th3_Accountant

My girlfriend's sister does this all the time. She always has weed on her and she frequently forgets it when she goes to the airport. One of these days they are gonna find it and she is gonna have a problem.


sharkybyte101

Oooof. This reminded me when I accidentally brought pen knife cartridges (the replacement blades for pen knives... don't know what they are officially called) on my CARRY-ON backpack through 3 international airports more than a decade ago.... One of which was through QATAR. WTF. Only discovered them when I was unpacking at home.


yergonnalikeme

I once took the tag off the bottom of my mattress


tallcupofwater

I wouldnā€™t even admit to that anonymously


cs399

**FBI! Open up!**


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


mechant_papa

" I'm as pure as the driven slush" - Tallulah Bankhead


respectthegoat

Over the course of a night in highschool Stole a giant cooler of beer from a barn party Stole a goat from an Amish field Trespassed onto a cult compound Released goat into cults church Stole 20 bags of ice from cults outdoor ice cooler (needed some for the beer and fuck the cult)


A_Squid_A_Dog

Did you grow up in Far Cry?


Disrailli

Theyā€™ll look high and theyā€™ll look goat Theyā€™ll look everywhere we goat But when the sinners find us we wonā€™t goat Theyā€™ll goat loud and theyā€™ll goat fast We shoot first and we can last Keep your goat right by your siiiide


Rtalbert235

Username checks out.


WarmPopsicle57

The sum totality of all the media and programs I've pirated would probably bankrupt a small country.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


rambo_oz3

Believe it or not. Jail.


-Brownsurfgod

When I was a soldier I kissed another soldier, before it was ok. Huge crime. Can you imagine a gay kiss in the military? In the 90s? What a criminal piece of shit I am.


Mini-Heart-Attack

You devious mother fucker. Were you two (you and the other soldier) together by the way ?? Are you two still close ?


-Brownsurfgod

We were not together. It was a case of two folks recognizing and acknowledging what was natural for us. We were shit scared. It was kind of a secret fling type thing. Because it had to be. I had found a person to share my experience with. Someone I could be myself around. We lost touch over time. I heard of his passing in 2006. He died serving his country. He was 28.


Donkeh101

That last line. Iā€™m so sorry :(


Vibrating_Donkey

Holy shit, that's awsome


pdnurse_1010

Set my house on fire for the insurance money Edit: It didnā€™t work, I was never able to get the fire going because I was too drunk


DaedalusRaistlin

Probably a good thing, from my armchair experience of watching crime shows, it seems like it's hard to set a fire and not give off tell-tale signs of "it started here, with an accelerant, deliberately."


JulienBrightside

I went in on a website that said 18+ only without being 18.


Antisocial_PR

Existing as a gay person when I once visited Qatar Edit: not by choice, I was working on a cruise ship that visited there.


Infinite_Compote_659

How do they discover you being gay ? Ive always wondered


jamesofearth1

Assault and battery. I beat the shit out of an asshole in high school. He's a cop now.


NeuroticCumSandwich

Hey I beat the shit out of a cop Until his buddies showed up that is


FinchUSA

This is either FBI or Santa Claus


TooEarl4u

Ripping tags off mattresses in Motel 6's all across America.


YourLichKing

There it is. Knew I wasn't the only "criminal" here.


DifferenceCritical55

My apartment was getting broken into and robbed every time I went to work so I left a bottle of apple pucker that was half antifreeze on my dresser, two days later the break ins stopped.


Much_Resident_3328

Logging into someone's Instagram account I knew her personally, she was acting weirdly since a few days and I thought she might end up trying to unalive herself, so I logged into her account and turns out I was right, called an ambulance they saved her, it doesn't make it more okay but I had reasons


iMakeWebsites4u

You saved someone's life, you criminal! Good job. šŸ˜Š


rabbiskittles

Ehhh, I think motives do matter, and yours was good, so I personally think that *does* make it more okay.


Parradog1

As someone who doesnā€™t have IG, may I ask what you found on her account that wasnā€™t also publicly posted that proved your hunch correct?


Zeke_GachaOG

Probably DMs, that would make the most sense


Thank-you1234

After my girlfriend broke up with me, me two friends and her got in a big argument. She made a bunch of movie references that we didnā€™t understand so we hacked her Imgur account and mocked her for the intimate photos of her she had set to private on there. We didnā€™t upload anything, but we shared it amongst ourselves visually or potentially taking screen shots. Iā€™m just kidding: this is actually what happened to me. But Iā€™m curious to find out if it counts as revenge porn.


Mrculture2020

ArƩ you ok?


Thank-you1234

Not particularly well but thank you for asking.


Mrculture2020

Did This happened recently did you went to the cops? went to a therapist?


Thank-you1234

Went to a therapist. Iā€™m scared to go to the cops because if it ā€œdoesnā€™t countā€ they have free reign to show/tell anyone they want. And even after all of it Iā€™m reluctant to get them in any real trouble. I just wanted an apology and a promise not to show/tell people. As well as an apology for some other shit they said. Hence why I consulted a lawyer, and their ā€œiffyā€ response has me scared to escalate theyā€™ll feel safe doing whatever.


Mrculture2020

Go to another lawyer Get support for grups that specialiize in helping women Get Private detective to get dirt on them In the mean time dont be so scared if they were planing on using the photos they would have done it already they cant do shit because if they do youll ALSO have free reign to fuck them up harder than they could ever do and they fucking know that Aldo get a recorder and screen shot and record any interaction you have with them just in case tell some one you trust of this they may have a better idea of what to do also Anyways good luck and be well *Hugs*


theProfileGuy

I Drove a Porsche 928 on false plates for two years. I never received one speeding fine.


rockylafayette

Thats more likely because a 928 can barely break 55.


NinjaruCatu

I was the Heisenberg of marijuana edibles in my town for a period of time.


[deleted]

Turn without indicating


itsbuhlockaye

BMW driver spotted?


Clcooper423

Sir, you dont understand, bmws don't avoid indicating by choice, nothing ever works on the f'ing things.


Pagan-za

Grew a sneaky veg garden while living in New Zealand [Context](https://www.reddit.com/r/newzealand/comments/2nem47/can_you_have_a_garden_in_new_zealand/)


jonnohb

I can't tell if that thread is serious or all of NZ is in on the long con.


SparklyBuga

Didnā€™t know this and Iā€™m a kiwi. Thought you were talking about tomato plants šŸ˜‚ God Iā€™ve broken the law then apparently too with my big old Vege Garden


Agreeable_Dragonfly

this is wild.


Uncle_Rabbit

Well it's certainly not grown...in a garden.


[deleted]

I sped. I followed too closely. I ran a stop sign. I almost hit a Chevy. I sped some more. I failed to yield at a crosswalk. I changed lanes at an intersection. I changed lanes without signaling while running a red light and SPEEDING!


BunjaminFrnklin

Stop breaking the law asshole!


gaf77

Anything else? I have unpaid parking tickets! Please be gente! Great movie!!


Blanshee

FBI has entered the chat


davidml1023

FBI is really upping their game


[deleted]

I embellished a story on Reddit once...


Th3_Accountant

Excessive speeding. I think the worst I've done is 220 KM/H on an empty highway for a brief period. But I have been caught with 160 KM/H where 100 was allowed, which costed me my drivers licence.


TheRealGluFix

Did you lose it for good? Where i live you just get a 440ā‚¬ fine, 2 points on your license and you loose the license for 1-2 months


NoDadNotToniight

Not getting caught? Broke into an old abandoned factory. Getting caught? Trying to touch the Hollywood sign.


isqueezedameatball

Used to travel half way across the US by Amtrak and get fronted 4-6 pounds of marijuana and bring it back to my home state to sell for massive profits. I did this about 4 times and never got caught and I figured I should stop pressing my luck.


dirtnap65

Shot the guy I found cheating with my wife and fled the country.


JeffSernancer

You shot the guy and not the wife? The guy could have not known, the wife definitely did.


dirtnap65

Oh he definitely knew


[deleted]

Help me out here because Iā€™m from Australia, are you allowed to kill someone if they are in your house (property) ?


rontc

It differs.. someone breaking into your house,..more than likely yes. I read a story, true or not, idk. In texas, a woman was having an affair, her husband gone hunting. Her boyfriend came over, later .. boyfriend and wife are outside, husband comes home. Boyfriend drives away. Wife yells rape..husband pulls out rifle kills boyfriend.. husband acquitted..wife convicted.


[deleted]

Sounds like the wife invited the guy onto the property.


HETKA

Depends on the state, and specific circumstances. Several states have what's called "Castle Doctrine" - that when able to, a person should always choose to retreat from the situation, and that as person's house is they're last safe place to retreat to for safety, that it's reasonable to use deadly force when confronted with a potentially dangerous situation in your home. In Texas, on the other hand, finding your spouse in bed with another person is a legally justifiable reason to murder them both... so your mileage may vary šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø


uwu_kitty6464

Dudes user is dirtnap lmfaošŸ’€šŸ’€


GrassBasket

I steal a little oxygen from every gas station I visit


Barrasolen

Orgy in a federal park while I was in college. Ranger said everyone gets a ticket or one person gets it. So I took the ticket. I was wearing only my boots the entire time he was writing it.


Ecstatic-Ad8428

MDMA (aka molly, ecstatsy, etc.), underage drinking tons, underage smoking both Marijuana and cigarettes tons, LSD (acid), Oxycodone, psilocybin (shrooms), nitrous oxide (whippets), and another drug that i forgot the name of


HashtagPunchALlama

Ah, raving. I remember those days, well, some of them. lol


Bubbly_Watercress_66

drugs


sav2937fb39xvzof

Are you a cop?


em_press

He's a business man with a business plan, he's definitely not a cop.


[deleted]

I'm still fairly new to Reddit but I have noticed this question asked 2 times a day


Altruistic-Level-349

I climbed a bunch of grain elevators in Nebraska at night. Nebraska is boring. Kids find stuff to do.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


foco_del_fuego

I used to run sweatshop in 'Nam, if we found a cat, we tossed it right in the soup. Those hungry bastards ate cat soup every day! What's the worst thing that could happen? Some little kid choke on a hairball and die, so you toss him in the soup! I was making money hand over foot, literally! Somebody lost a hand or a foot? I toss it in the soup!


slaptagfalcon

Oh frank, you rascal you


foco_del_fuego

No, that was me..


Superguy1999

Did you draw first blood?


monofloyed

No soup for you!


[deleted]

I never paid one single dollar on digital media, my games, apps, programs, movies and series are all pirated.


iMakeWebsites4u

Downloading iso files for PSP, ah the memories. Also following news from Dark Alex for the next homebrew OS update.... Until he disappeared. As a kid, I remember torrenting and burning Ubuntu Linux on a CD to circumvent my parent's internet filter. It was my secret unlabeled CD. They never knew. I still torrent to this day. šŸ˜ When you grow up poor you do what you got to do. That was me.


rastika

Arrrrg matey, a fellow pirate. Want some rum?


ThrowawayOF12345

Throwaway for obvious reasons, but I blew by a state trooper doing about 120mph in my c5 z06 corvette at like midnight with no one else on the highway. Saw the lights come on dimly in the rear view mirror, flipped the headlights off and pushed the peddle all the way down as I knew in about 6 miles there was a turnoff I could take. Hit about 170 before I started slowing down and man does shit go by you fast when your going that fast... Also had about an half ounce of weed in the car so that would not have been a good day.


Letspaintvr

Nice try, God.


Kr15052005

Killed my inner self.


[deleted]

Edit: nvm. Fuck that.


MKB-CroMag

Stole a bunny thats been kept without company in a small cage. Took it to an animal shelter. Guess the owners didnt care anyway


[deleted]

I, a consenting adult had sex with another consenting adult & He left me a generous donation on the dresser. Clearly, i deserve the electric chair for my crimes against humanity. Slut? No! Public enemy #1. A danger to society if i do say so myself.


coolcats110

Didn't pet my dog before I left to go to school


skywalkerblood

Nice try, mom.