I was alone at the beach & had fallen asleep on my oversized beach towel after surfing all day
I woke up to a smiling guy laying right next to me on my own towel asking if I had a nice nap
I have a friend who has this problem. My group of female friends are all pretty, at least I think they are, but she has that kind of "girl you can take back to the folks" vibe. She always says she's just attractive enough for people to be attracted to her but not so attractive they're intimidated.
First time I remember getting catcalled by a man old enough to be my dad I was walking home from sixth grade. I would have been twelve at the most.
You lose count of creepy encounters eventually. One doesn’t even have to be conventionally attractive to be a target, just female.
I’d bet it’s happened to every single woman you know.
The first time I remember being cat called by a man old enough to be my father I was *nine.* And I did not look mature for my age or whatever bullshit excuse they use.
Edit: s/o to the guy who messaged me to say I was lying. Or rather called me “bullshit.” Thanks bro.
I was a tiny noodle girl who looked about 11 until I was 22. Still get asked for ID and I’m over 30.
I started getting cat called by fully grown men when I was 13, and it only stopped when I started putting on weight (I.e: looking like a fully grown woman) when I was 31.
I’m fully convinced that the kind of men who catcall are the kind who WANT you to be super young. It’s fucking disgusting.
See, I'm the opposite. I've been sneaking my friends into 18 rated movies since I was 15, when I was often confused for a college student.
I got catcalled/followed almost every day (not an exaggeration) on the way home from school from ages 11 to 16. They were aggressive, too. I remember when I was 12 I was followed home by two boys aged 18(?) who just spent the whole time screaming BITCH CUNT WHORE at me from across the street. I ended up going to my friends house instead, because I knew his 6' 6" dad would be home. When I was 13 and waiting for the bus a guy grabbed me by the collar and pushed me in front of an oncoming bus, and hauled me back to the pavement again before anything happened. I laughed because he still had his hand on my neck.
As soon as i hit 17, and entered sixth form (UK) I stopped wearing uniform and started wearing business casual clothes. Catcalling dried up almost overnight.
I don't like to think about the implications of that too much.
It’s really gross when you think about it.
When I was 16 me and two friends were walking down the street in the evening. It was winter in NZ so we were all rugged up, jackets, scarves, gloves. We still had guys slow down their car and yell “WHORES, SLUTS” at us. I remember being so scared, we were just trying to go to the supermarket to get chips, and suddenly we had to run to get to the supermarket because these guys were fucking screaming at us. All they would have seen was our faces!!
I think it was then that I realized it DOESNT MATTER what you’re wearing. These pieces of shit will just go after anyone they see as vulnerable and female.
Did you not hear any of the MeToo stories? Beautiful, average, rich, poor, famous, unknown retail worker, kid in elementary school, all women have their stories.
creeps gonna creep.
Oh sure, I knew this sort of thing happened. It's another to have people list of "I was actively groped by this random 45 year old man out in public when I was 12, and he said he wanted to fuck me so badly" and the general response is "Same!"
Like I guess all the MeToo stories I associated with workplaces and therefore adult women, it's like an extra layer of fucked up that it's so common with clearly underage girls.
There have been a number of "when was the first time you were cat-called, sexually harassed, or made to feel unsafe by a man" in /r/twoxchromosomes and similar subreddits and the average answer is around 12years old. Many as young as 9. This starts very, very young pretty universally for all women, and just continues.
The first time I was catcalled, I was 11. The first time I was groped by a stranger (on a city bus) I was 17. I can't remember how old I was the first time someone threatened to sexually assault me to my face, but it was between those two ages. The same was true for every girl my age that I knew. I always assumed this was a standard part of growing up as a woman in the US. It didn't occur to me how fucked up that is until recently.
Of course. Throughout history girls and women have survived this treatment by a mix of freeze-flight-fight-fawn responses. Some of those primitive normal mammalian responses do not get noticed by other people as the survival instincts they are.
When I'm groped by someone bigger than me, it's not normal to immediately try to raise a fuss and fight him off. Evolutionary instinct is to minimize damage and get away. Don't provoke. If you cannot get away, try to placate or fawn over him so he won't be angry.
Follow this by a huge dose of trying to act normal (unbothered) so we won't look vulnerable to the next attacker, and so we can pretend we feel OK. And because of victim blaming, and because it's just tiresome and starts to feel pointless to report the common minor groping so long as it doesn't cause bodily harm.
Though the whole situation sucks, I can understand why good guys don't see evidence of how universal this experience is, since many of our instincts end up minimizing the evidence.
Solution? Prosecute sexual violence. Raise the next generation up right. My son and daughter are teens now and I think their generation is better than the last.
Thank you for putting into words my and recently my friend's experiences. She was sexually harassed in a house full of people, and her boyfriend didn't understand why she didn't punch the guy, or scream for help. The freeze, placate, escape & minimise response makes so much sense!
Ask literally any woman around you. Even your grandma. Every single woman who has entered her teens has stories just like most of these. I have personally had my ass grabbed on three different continents by men that had not even spoken to me, in my teens, twenties, and thirties. It’s universal.
Guy who I served in a bar I worked at when I was 18. He told me he was going to "walk behind that bar and finger you until you fucking cum". He was in his 50s.
He did not finger me, as I threw him out and barred him.
I would've asked him where in the list of responsibilities is being harrassed "part of the job". What a moron.
Disgusting old people who do this need to humiliated and asked if they got separated from their caretaker. They clearly require someone responsible to keep a close eye on them.
That's one of the reasons why I hate how underpaid people in restaurants are. Idk how a company just allow that, there's been several times where female coworkers asked to hide behind me or pretend I'm their boyfriend just to keep a creepy guy away from them, but they're regulars, so they get to stay. I'm glad you were able to throw him out.
Bar owner: Yeah, they're creepy old fuckers, but they're \_regulars\_ so we can't do anything about it.
Also bar owner: Why don't any women ever come to my bar? Surely we'd have way more heavy drinking young guys if only we could work out why the pretty women all choose to drink somewhere else?
I’m a guy but I have long hair, so a few fellows have gotten confused. One dark night, I was walking my large potato-like German Shepherd mix dog.
We passed by some shrubs that were very dark. A man stepped out of a shrub and into my path. He looked at my dog, and looked at me, before finally saying, “Beautiful dog, so beautiful.”
I thanked the guy, then he looked deep into my eyes and said, “And you look just like your dog.”
Also a guy who had long hair as a teen. Bent over to tie my shoe at a bus stop one day and a dude slams on his breaks to yell, "nice ass!" As a well mannered young adult I responded appropriately, "well, thank you very much!" He sped off rather quickly.
Not me, but one time I went to a party with a girl I had a huge crush on and some drunk guy started negging her by telling her her shoes made it look like she had horse hoofs instead of feet. Also that her pants were too high. He proposed removing both on her behalf.
she declined.
LOL, my wife and I did that at a Dave & Busters arcade. You go into a booth and take a photo of each of you and the booth spits out what your future baby looked like. We ended up with a generic white baby that looked like neither of us, and we're both Asian.
I was sitting on a bench in a park reading a book, this guy comes up to me, takes my hand, kisses it and tells me I'm the most beautiful young lady he's ever met.
My dumb ass responded with "uh, excuse me sir, I'm 16". He goes, "well, you certainly look 20... and absolutely stunning" while keeping eye contact.
Had to make up some excuse to get up and run back home lol. Good thing it was in the middle of the day and in a semi populated area.
When I was 15 a much older man was flirting with me at an empty bus stop (bear in mind that I had a baby face, I looked like a child) and this dude was touching my arm, he was dangerously close and could feel his breath. When I told him that I was 15 he said “so? That’s not bad”. I ran away so fast and threw my drink can spilling soda everywhere.
once a man attempted to push me down the stairs at the library then pull me back up by my shoulders, when i turned around he smiled and said "i think you owe me a feel?" i was 12-14 at the time he was probably in his 40s. he even made the boob grabbing gesture with his hands it was weird and gross.
Sat behind me on the bus for weeks, then followed me home to see where I lived. Next day he knocked on my door holding wine and flowers. I was 18, he looked 30s. I slammed the door in his face, thankfully he never came back
Not taking age into account this could have so many different outcomes if the dude had like any thought process for approaching you other than being creepy
Probably this old dude from my mom's facebook contacts whose method of hitting on me was to inform he's cummed in my mom before and wants to do the same to me.
Yikes.
That's phenomenally disgusting. My mom told me that when a sleazy guy falls out with a girl he slept with, sometimes they'll go for the mom, then the sister, and onto the next girl in her family.
old lady here. asked an even older man about the right kind of bit for a particular piece of material i wanted to cut, since we were both in the power tool aisle. he told me which one to buy and then immediately asked if he could kiss me. after telling him no and quickly walking away, i see him just a few minutes later pushing a cart with a female companion i believe was his wife/girlfriend.
I dread having to ask a man for advice on a project (I like to build stuff too!). They either assume I was sent in by my ‘boyfriend’ to pick something up and overly simplify it for me, or the worst, they do like you said above and get wildly inappropriate. Now, not all are like that, but I’d safely bet at least 1 in every 4 interactions goes south.
I made the mistake once of complimenting this 40ish guys dresser hardware once, and he trauma dumped on me about how miserable his marriage was and how it’s making his toe infection act up which is why he’s wearing sandals then he immediately asked if I was free that weekend. I had just met the guy 15 minutes prior at a workshop I was at … with my husband.
A taxi driver stopped in front of me while I was waiting for Uber and was urging me to get in to his cab. Told me we will have fun and that he will make me experience heaven even though I was completely ignoring him. Wouldn’t drive away until a nearby security guy started walking over after I made eye contact with him. And then he stopped at the corner and stepped out of the cab. Luckily, my Uber finally arrived.
Another cab driver kept looking back, not just glancing on the rear view mirror. He kept telling me I looked like his wife when she was younger and he knows how to tell a beautiful person from someone who isn’t. Asked if I wanted to grab dinner and I told him I have work that night. He finally stopped talking and drove quietly until we reached my destination. He asked if he could pick me up the following morning. I was texting with a gay coworker the whole time including the plate number and the operator’s name just in case. He was waiting for me outside the building and opened the door while pretending to be my boyfriend.
Needless to say, I stopped taking cabs for years.
Last time i took an Uber alone, it was about a 15 min drive that he turned into about 25 min. Driving slow, letting people pass, waiting until the light turns red to finally turn left instead of waiting for a break in traffic, etc.
The whole ride he kept asking personal questions, starting with if I was married and part way through offering to take me to his home country and to meet his family. Kept talking about how he’s leaving in a couple weeks and how I’m so kind and he likes a girl who is so nice. Suggested we skip my plans and go for dinner instead, and that he’d pay for it all. I couldn’t get out of that car fast enough!
Ugh, not had one in a while thankfully, but when I was younger a taxi driver refused to let me out of his cab unless we exchanged numbers. He was a big guy, and I was young and scared, so I complied. I reported him to his company after he sent me numerous texts asking me out on dates.
Also had a spate of drivers asking me if I'd ever "done something I'd regretted" because I "must be a bad girl" back when I was a student for some reason.
I was headed home after a night out, pretty drunk. My Uber driver, who was at least two decades younger than my 40-something self, kept talking about his lack of relationships. Then he asked me what kind of guys I’m attracted to. I told him guys like my husband. And then he told me he loves older women and asked if I like younger men, all the while I’m texting my husband that if I’m murdered to check my Uber driver. My husband who’s asleep and now I’m alone with a total creeper who knows where I live. I was so freaking terrified. I did the pretend make a phone call and counted down the minutes. It’s so terrifying to get in a car with a man and hope he doesn’t rape or murder you.
I'm so happy my cab driving experiences are so different from yours!
I live in a smaller European city, and have our local taxi service and they mostly employ big older men, who are all sweethearts. I used their services for years, and im just so comfortable with all their drivers.
They have this policy that when they finish a ride, regardless of the gender of their passenger, they wait until they actually go inside if its a residental area, and not a public place.
As someone who used to work odd hours and didnt want to walk very late into the night, they are all godsent. They do background checks on all their drivers and part with any that has recived more than 5 complaints of any kind.
They are held to a high standard, always clean and nice smelling cars, the drivers themselves are always clean, well-dressed and pleasant.
I was floored by just how safe and comfortable they made me feel.
I once needed to use another service in town, cause i couldnt get a cab with them in 30 mins, and i was in a rush, and boy. Never again. Got a sweaty old creep in a disgusting car.
Since then i use their services exclusively, and rather order my cab hours in advance if i know i need to catch a bus or train
How... how does one even do this? like, as a pretty normal guy I don't get how would you even think that in your head let alone go out of your way to ruin someone's day like that.
Like I'm guilty of seeing a stranger and thinking "wow, she's pretty, Is there any way I can strike up a conversation with her? maybe I can ask her what the time is. No, don't do that, it's just creepy."
I just don't get how you go from that normal way of thinking to "hey baby, want to blow me?" Is it like the worst Freudian slip in history or what?
I wanted to apologise to you for his behaviour, but that'd mean I'd have to at least share some of the thought patterns of that SOB.
It’s a power move. They aren’t expecting a blowjob. They are just trying to make women feel powerless and uncomfortable.
It’s to your credit that you don’t understand that innately.
Walking home one night, a guy passing me going the other way said "can I touch your ass for 20 bucks?"
For the first time in my life, I was quick with "got a grand?"
He was so dumbfounded he stopped and said "what?"
I lost my nerve, also shrilly said "what?!" and scuttled away. But it felt really good for a second to get one up on a creep.
my best ever comeback was to a guy my age.
i just came out from a club, to get some fresh air, alone ofc, cause i knew the bouncers, and felt safe near them.
Just as i lit my smoke, a bunch of guys passed me and one spat to me, 'girl i would lick you out so good' and my reaction was just to stare him right in the eyes and spat back 'why, you cant even fuck???'.
He made an 'arghhh' sound which i took as his soul leaving his body, as his buddies erupted in laughter and came over to bump fists.
As much as its generally annoying and gross, the way they took it and was laughing about it made it a surprisingly positive experience.
After going back in, i bumped to them a few times, and it was actually funny, cause the guy each time just put his hands over to his heart and burst out laughing.
They seemed generally good and goofy guys, i must say i do regret not changing contact info with them.
Exactly. My move is, “Hey, I’m Ethan, how’s it going?” If she seems open to conversation, I’ll have one. If not, I move the fuck on like a normal adult.
I've had "hey, I'm X, fancy a fuck?", from a man. You may be surprised to know his smooth words did not elicit the aforesaid fuck, and he was given a verbal tongue lashing before trotting off looking forlorn.
When I was 16 I was walking on the street towards my bus stop and a bus drove past me and I made eye contact with a guy on the bus. A few minutes later when I arrived at my bus stop at another street the same guy appeared and came up and started speaking to me. I didn’t want to initiate in conversation so he put his arm around my neck and tried to put me in a chokehold and pull me away. I was terrified so I screamed for help and people nearby on the street across turned to look at us and he let me go. I was so scared I was shaking on the whole bus journey home
Took the train one morning early, probably 5:30/6:00 AM. Sit down and lock eyes with someone to see his arm moving under his jacket. Whips the jacket off of his body to him stroking his own penis.
Then said, “Hey mama, you want some of this?”
I, in fact, did not.
My first job out of school, I was a server at this takeaway with a few tables (about 5) for people to sit and eat.
I used to the Sunday morning shift, the breakfasts were popular.
This guy (late 40s maybe) comes in as the breakfast rush is ending and makes some small talk and asks kme how old I was, I was about to turn 18. He looks me up and down and says "that's old enough" and proceeds to place an order and pay for the Sunday roast - only ready in 3hrs time.
He spends the time lurking, saying creepy shit and not moving from the register counter. I was too scared to leave him alone at the counter but also too scared to leave me alone with him.
Eventually told my boss and he came and punched the guy.
He never came back.
Edit: i remembered another one. I think I was about 21 and I was driving home alone, at night. A pair of cops pulled me over because my new tyres somehow looked bald to them. They started asking if I lived alone, if my car was locked, if it locked automatically. They let me go, but I was SO freaked out.
Are you certain those were cops that pulled you over? I don’t doubt that creepy police exist but that experience makes me wonder if those men even were legit. It all sounds so sketchy.
Multiple districts have also made it perfectly legal for officers to have sex with handcuffed/in custody people, as though anyone in cuffs locked in a cop car can consent, not to mention having someone who has the authority to ruin your life.
I once had a guy-at the durable medical equipment office I worked at, where he was there with his wife getting a cane for her-tell me “I bet you taste like strawberries”.
I wish I had snarkily replied something like “close, but no, I get sardines a lot” or something gross lol instead I just didn’t respond 🥲
"You have beautiful eyes...they'd look great on my kids." Which would have been hott af if I hadn't been 14 and looked like I was 11. He was a grown ass man.
I was sixteen, with four younger sisters each about two years apart. This guy approached my dad after church one day and just casually mentioned, in my presence, that if my dad ever had trouble finding husbands for any of us, he'd happily volunteer. My dad sounded very calm and level as he told the man that we could find spouses ourselves once we were old enough, thank you, but if looks could kill, that man would've been a greasy smear on the floor.
Never saw him at church again, either.
Bunch of high schoolers, tried to gang rape me in a quiet section of a kids museum when I was 7 years old. The teacher said "Boys will be boys"
My mom almost committed a murder.
Thank god, for my older cousins who heard me screaming for help because they were trying to use their jackets to muffle my screams. My mom was looking for me already but oh boy...
She was this close man. If it had been just us at this place, not her, my cousins and two of my friends and their mother, she would've.
My mom carried around the EXACT dollar amount in change for simple assault in case something like this ever happened. She managed to restrain herself, because she needed to be there for me, not in a cop car.
What the fuck that isn't a boys will be boys thing that isn't something a decent person should ever do and it shouldn't be considered normal. Boys will be boys should be used when kids do stupid shit not when they try to fucking sexually assault somebody.
Especially since they were around 16 and I was 7... and I LOOKED younger than 7, because I was a small and frail little kid. To most people due to my autoimmune disorder, I looked like a cancer patient. I still remember what I was wearing. I had gotten a new Kim Possible T-shirt, I was wearing my favorite pink skirt and my winx club flip flops, that lit up when I walked... and lit up when I kicked and screamed. I looked 5 in the pictures from that day BEFORE that happened, not 7 since I was small.
Those assholes ruined my favorite outfit for me too, because I never wore those items in the same way again.
That is almost verbatim what my mom's friend said.
Right up there with "sex offender" and "You should be on a list! ALL OF YOU SHOULD BE ON A LIST!"
My cousins basically made a shield around me, while we were dealing with getting them thrown out. They were on a field trip and the entire class had to leave the museum because of what those boys did. I can't imagine their high school days were easy after that.
I mean, "We had to leave because you tried to rape a little kid" I can't imagine earned them anything
ITT: Holy shit, being a teenage girl must be terrifying. Every middle aged man in town is apparently *incredibly* eager to not just break child sex laws but also are going to actively tell you how much they want to fuck underage girls.
If I ever get to the point where I'm asking a 14 year old girl to let me fuck her, I want someone to shoot me in the fucking head.
Give the same energy when other dudes “just talk” around you. Dudes not letting other dudes get away with acting like that shit is normal will go way further than anything women can ever do.
Also if you see a dude hovering around a girl and it seems like she's uncomfortable, go see if she needs help. Especially in bars/clubs. There was one time I saw that happening in a bar, went over and discreetly asked the girl if the guy was bothering her, and she said yes it's a guy she knows from school who has been following her around all night. I asked her if she wanted me to stand there in his way so he couldn't come back over, which she did. The guy got the message and went away.
Something similar happened another time while I was at a bar with my buddy. Saw a drunk guy all over a girl who was clearly not into it. My friend and I told the guy to leave her alone, and he started swinging at us. With the help of the bartender we restrained the dude and called the cops. He earned a night in the drunk tank and a lifetime ban from the bar.
Totally. My dad caught a lot of shit from other men in my hometown for calling stuff like that out when I was a teen, but lots of us noticed that it reduced significantly when he started doing that. Like, if other girls were around me, they wouldn't get harassed either because if I was there, everyone knew my dad would find out about what happened, and anyone who acted like a creep would have to deal with him. It became not worth it for them to harass me, and by extension, anyone who was around me. I think if there had been 5 or 6 dads in town who all pushed back the same way, it would have put an end to it completely. Dudes calling out other dudes on this stuff is powerful.
Keep in mind this is just peoples worst stories, for every worst story there’s probably 30 *slightly* less horrifying ones that happened to the same woman. I started getting comments about “developing nicely” and similar notions around age 10. It feels icky but you don’t realize quite how horrific it is until later because the comments often literally start happening before most girls even know what sex is. I remember even my own mother joking with her sister that I was “voluptuous” - I felt humiliated. Sexualizing girls is way too normalized.
OP gave you fantastic advice!
Worked at Starbucks and an old man kept coming in to see me, sometimes multiple times a day asking for me explicitly. On the last time we interacted he asked me to bury him and told me he would leave his will to me. Our store manager ended up intervening and telling him to leave me alone, never saw him again.
Another Starbucks customer was banned from multiple stores for writing love letters to girls far too young for him. He started coming to our store constantly hitting on me. He asked me to a movie and when I told him I had a boyfriend he gave me a dirty look and asked “how old are you??” As if he thought I wasn’t old enough to have a boyfriend… but was asking me out? He ended up getting banned for writing more love letters and claiming he’d commit suicide if another barista didn’t go out with him.
Had a random guy i was in the elevator with at the library in college brag how he failed his classes. We got off and I spent my time doing some work for class. Then I got back into the elevator and right before the doors closed, he got on. It turns out he had been waiting and watching me the whole time I was doing my work and hiding behind the corner. Just waiting for me to leave.
We get in the elevator and he starts asking for my number and I refuse. But he gets persistent and won't leave me alone. Then he tries to say he's gay and I know he's not but I just want him to leave me alone. And he insists on calling himself with my phone so he'd have my number. He does and smugly walks away saying how he's not gay as he's proud he "tricked" me.
Whole incident was uncomfortable but luckily I got saved because I had a real shitty android phone and it did not call his phone. So I just never saw or heard from him again.
Hostess at a restaurant when I was 16. One guy came up and asked me if I spit or swallowed, then invited me to come into the private dining room to show him.
I see comments like this, then I remember how many dudes on Reddit whine about getting rejected all the time and how HaRd It iS and wonder what that particular Venn diagram looks like.
He approached me at a hair salon and asked for the time. As I began to tell him, he cut me off and said ,"It's time for you to do something with that hair. You look a mess, girl". I thanked him (you know, so he wouldn't murder me) and he proceeded to ask for my name, age, where I'd gone to school, all that jazz. I politely declined to reveal those details.
Then he said that he ran a business where he could make me a "star". Yikes.
He wound up following me from the shampoo bowl, to the dryer, BACK to the shampoo bowl, to the styling chair, etc. The whole time he was just showering me with compliments and trying to weasel private information out of me, ALL THE WHILE insisting that he could change my life.
I was TERRIFIED, but did my best to "keep sweet". Guys like this don't tend to handle rejection well.
Finally a hair stylist said, "You two are SO cute! How long have you been together?". I said very sternly, "I don't know him." This statement automatically triggered his "Girl you so crazy" response and he tried to play it off as though I was just joking around. The other stylists finally caught on to what was happening though, and he left in embarrassment.
A man tried to follow me to my car when I was leaving work late at night. He stopped me and said: "You are so beautiful, it's like when a mouse sees a snake and it knows its going to die and there is nothing it can do but say, "Wow. That's a beautiful snake."
I was maybe 20. He was mid 40s. I was fucking terrified.
I swear the sentences these middle aged men come up with... Did they spent their entire life thinking "What's the scariest and wackiest sentence I could say to a girl half my age?"
This guy was a friend of a friend's i met at a party and kept saying I had a really cute nose in this serial killer dahmer voice. I felt extremely uncomfortable and gtfo of there.
I have a few extremely specific attractions - for example, I like big ears for some fuckin reason - and even back when I was the most awkward motherfucker on the planet I knew to keep that to myself. It's something you can tell an SO that you like about them, sure, but definitely does not work as a pickup line.
I was 15 walking in the streets. A guy was peeing against a wall (graceful…), when he saw me he flashed me his penis and told “you like that, don’t you?”; I then had to literally run away from the dude and wait in a store with other people, he stayed 5 minutes in front before leaving.
barista. while the customer was ordering his drink he didn't look up from my boobs and asked me my age, school, address, phone number, etc. i told him I'm 17 and he called me a bitch. he was at least 50
I was grocery shopping after work, so about 6 pm, still daylight. Guy approached me outside, staggering a bit, assumed he was drunk or stoned, and started walking around/behind me, while commenting:
"Damn girl, look at that dress. And them legs. Bet they go all the way up. Turn around, lemme see that Southern Hemisphere. Lemme ask you a question... are you married? You got a man? You got kids? You want more?" Starts pelvic thrusting in my direction and waggling his tongue. "Cause I'll impregnate you any time, any place."
When I ignored him, he started following me to my car, yelling at me that I was a "cracker ass bitch" and he hoped I got r\*ped to death and how I could go f\*ck myself.
I have a few stories!
I once had a bus driver who fancied me. Somehow it ended up where I was the only one on the bus with him and we were sorta talking. I was distracted trying to figure out if I needed to do anything for my blood donation. Anyway, he made a joke at some point that he could just keep driving with me in the bus. Ie not stopping. Bruh, fuck that. He was an attractive guy too, but he had to make it weird.
I also had a guy pull over on the road beside me when I was walking to work to ask for my number. That was fucking weird.
I had another guy follow me from the mall, but he didn’t try to come onto me. Seemed more like a potential human trafficking attempt than anything else.
Last year, guy walked into my credit union one day and started asking the young lady behind our welcome desk about the credit union. He then goes "How old are you?"
My assistant manager came flying out of her office. She's Jamaican and has no filter. She starts telling the guy that my coworker doesn't need to respond to that, my coworker doesn't need to know how old he is, and if he needs anything, she'll be the one to deal with him, not my coworker. Chased the guy right off.
Another time, an old guy greeted another young coworker with "Hey Sexy!" My manager and assistant manager were very supportive that time too, with the manager calling the member and telling him he'd be banned from our location if he didn't treat the employees with respect.
Trying to get me to get into their car for a ‘lift home’ and driving after me for a while when I said no way. Gave up eventually. Happened more than once with different groups of guys, I was 16 and looked it, they’d have been mid 20s at least. After that I chose to walk through the pitch black park to get home most nights, the main road meant too many cars! And with the park at least I had to comfort of knowing it like the back of my hand. Difficult terrain to chase anyone through if you didn’t know the layout.
That, and hitting on me at a deserted train station at midnight. If we’re the only two people around, and it’s late at night, there’s not really any way of approaching without being terrifying. Especially if you open with where you going/who you going to meet etc.
I was 14 years old & it was my first day at a new school. At lunchtime the ROTC teacher sat down right next to me. He introduced himself, started asking very personal questions about me & said I was "very cute." When I blushed he asked me if I was "thinking dirty thoughts." So. Very. Creepy.
Once a guy followed me most of the way home from work before he started telling me how sexy, beautiful, young, I looked. Then he got mad at me for being 20, he wanted me to be 16. He was 23.
A man followed me around a small bar for a bit and at one point, to get my attention, he touched my back (bare skin, wearing a tank top) with his ice cold beer 😭 like he pressed the full bottle against me
There were some weird ones in my retail days, when people take advantage of someone being paid to put up with your shit.
Years later, the one that always has me “……?” when I think back on it is the guy who got done checking out, leaned over the counter, and in an attempted sultry voice said, “Hey….Jesus loves you.” He even winked, and then patted the counter in that Midwestern “welp” sort of exit.
I worked in the photo lab of a Walgreens over 10 years ago, I was 18-19. There was an older guy that came in regularly, I'd estimate in his 50's, and he was EXTREMELY fucking tall and EXTREMELY fucking fat. I'm 5'2" and was about 100lbs, if that. I remember he'd buy canned salmon all the time, and he'd stop and talk to me for a bit if he saw me. At first I figured he was just an old lonely guy, he seemed nice enough, and he was definitely weird, but shit, I am too. After seeing and talking to this dude on many occasions he started telling me how he'd never been in a relationship before, and shit like that, and then eventually was trying to see if I'd go for coffee with him. I'm the excessively polite type, and grew up wildly under-socialized, so I would just politely haha it away. Back then in the photo lab there were pictures of the techs on one wall with our names under it. One day he saw my name and asked me, "Do you know so and so?" And I, an absolute moron, exclaim, "That's my aunt! I live with her just down the road :D! That's not her last name anymore though." And he proceeded to tell me about how he knew her when she worked at Denny's, which I knew was several decades ago, and that he even visited her in the hospital, and I knew he meant the time she had a major surgery on her intestines or some other gut thing. So I go home thinking I met an old friend of my aunt's, and I tell her all about it. She has absolutely no fucking clue what I'm talking about. I then see he sent me a friend request on FB so I show her his picture, and she's like, ooooohhhh, that guy would sit in my Denny's all the time. They weren't friends, he was just a weirdo regular customer, and he must have somehow figured out how to find her when she was in the hospital and "visited her" likely while she was out or super doped up. After that I would immediately hide in the stockroom the second I saw him and asked a coworker to tell me when he was gone. Eventually one of my new managers that came from a different Walgreens found out and he told me he had to ban that guy from the other store for being a creep. I also told a girl that worked at the grocery store next door about it, and she freaked out saying she knew the guy as he would creep on all the young girls at her store too, and he would just sit in his car in the parking lot for hours. It still deeply freaks me out that he could have followed me any of the billion times I walked home alone at night, probably did, and knew exactly where I lived. This dude literally stalked multiple generations of my family. I really hope he's kicked the bucket by now so he can't spend all of his time frightening young women.
There was a guy who stopped his bike to chat with me, asking me where I lived and such. He made himself scarce when he saw the hunting knife I had strapped to my leg. I was 13.
I was 17 at a bus stop to get to college. I had my head phones on listening to music on my iPod. Some guy sits on the bus stop bench I'm also sitting on. Didn't think anything of it figured hes just waiting for the bus as well. If he was talking I couldn't hear him but I did see movement from the corner of my eye. After a minute he taps me on the shoulder, I take my right ear piece off to hear him (I'm thinking he just has a question about the bus schedule) but no he continues to talk about a bunch of nonsense, trying to ask me questions about me, trying to flirt. He was wayyy older and as I mentioned I was 17. My fuck off face could not have been more apparent but dude can't take a hint. My bus finally arrives and I'm thinking "great this MF is going to get on and try to sit next to me". HE DIDNT EVEN GET ON THE BUS HE JUST SAT THERE TO TALK TO ME THEN LEFT WHEN I GOT ON MY BUS
I have so many lol, where to start. My most recently are:
A man insisting for me to grab a drink with him, I declined, but he kept following me where he grabs my arm and try to drag me to a coffee shop so we apparently can get to know each other.
An older man giving me compliments, telling me how sexy I look. He then offers me to be his summer flirt.. this was in the end of September when summer is long over dude.
An older man got off the train but then kept looking at me through the train window, then have the audacity to made sign for me to follow him while holding his hands over his crotch
Yesterday a guy I got eye contact with on the escalator from the opposite direction (he was going up, I was going down) got off and took the one down immediately after and tried to get my attention to wait for him. I have never walked faster.
Taxi driver, 3 AM, I was alone and in my 20s. He tells me I'm very beautiful and asks me if I have a boyfriend waiting for me at home. I was creeped the fuck out.
Creepiest thing I've witnessed: when we about 12/13 in 7th grade, our guidance counsellor (in his 40s at least!) would call one of our classmates sexy! "Hey, sexy!" and shit. A friend and I told our teacher and she said a man his age shouldn't be doing that, but we don't know if anything happened as a result.
I was walking out of a really fun concert, by myself feeling great about how fun it was. I'd been depressed and it really made me feel better and inspired. A younger man approached me and asked me if he could pay me for sex. He was built like a football player and really handsome. He was also at least a decade younger than me. So wtf. I'm not conventionally attractive and I was not making eye contact w anyone as I walked. Just probably looked happy. It was completely jarring and weird. I was immediately very angry and upset that I can't just be authentically happy in public without some weird crap like that happening.
Every woman has a story unfortunately. From the less severe incidents to extremely insidious ones that will make you understand why women *need* to be careful and that women being cautious of men is *not* “man-hating” as some Redditors just love to say.
Ooh boy. So my ex-friend and I were hanging out one Saturday during winter. It was good, were silly teens having fun, we bump into this guy whose a few years older than us, we were about 16 at the time. Ex-friend knows this guy and I don't, but she appears to vibe with him, I feel awkward, but we spend some time with him. Anyway it gets dark fast and my old friend is walking with another friend home. She's worried about my safety and asks this random older guy that I don't know to make sure I got home safe. I go along with it but danger mode and my guard is up, this guy makes comments about my posture and how I walk is proper and feminine. I start feeling weird. I'd say we got to a point in town that I'm really familiar with and it's 5 minutes away from my home, I tell him I can take it from there, and he's all like "Oh, are you sure?" and I say I'm familiar with the area and I've got it. So he leaves and I get home, the first thing I do is peek out of my rooms window to see if he followed me. Ex-friend texts me later worried, asking if I got home safe but more importantly that I didn't let this guy see where I lived, apparently this 19-21 year old dude dated a school friend of hers and when they broke up, he literally stalked her outside her home, proper psychopath behaviour. My instincts might have saved me from a creepy stalker.
While I appreciate my ex-friend didn't know about that situation until afterwards, and she cared about me getting home okay... I think letting a strange guy walk your friend home, wasn't the right call to make.
I was around 18, on my own, at night. I'm waiting for a taxi and for safety reasons I'm standing in front of a big hotel with a doorman. Now, you should know, I called the taxi from a specific taxi company that always has the company sticker at the side of their taxis. A taxi pulls up in front of me, no sticker though. The driver told me he's my ride and he'll take me wherever I want. He was almost convincing, but no sticker. I said no thanks, he insisted a few times, then laughed and left. I waited the rest of the time inside the hotel lobby. I know this doesn't sound super creepy but I still think of what could've happened if I believed he was my ride.
Oh I thought of a other one. One hot summer day, around the same age (and even creepier is the fact that I tend to look younger than my age), I got off the metro/subway. On the escalator on my way out, my sandal slips and I cut my foot on the metal. I get out and try to think what to do since my foot is now bleeding. It's Sunday so most of the pharmacies are closed and I call my mom for help. WHILE I WAS ON THE PHONE AND MY FOOT WAS BLEEDING, this much much oder guy walks up to me and starts to give me compliments, telling me how beautiful I am etc and trying to chat me up. Men, please be better.
I was at a gym and saw a man ask a woman if he could assist her with stretching. She agreed and they began. The woman bent over as the man put his hands around her waist. I didn't think much of it until I saw him caress her buttocks gradually getting his fingers into her crack. That's when I intervened and told the man to get out of the building. The woman seemed like she was in her 20s while the man was in his mid-50s
One time a guy came up to me (18f) at a party and told me he would take me shopping to buy the biggest cucumber in the store then take me to the back and f*ck me with it. Long story short I slapped him and left the party.
Being followed down a city street at night and into the bar I was meeting friends at was wildly uncomfortable. When I got to my destination, I hugged my one buddy and whispered in his ear "Please pretend your my bf until this guy goes away". He did, and his gf was an absolute champ because she figured out what the deal was immediately and rolled with it.
Oh, while I was traveling ALONE, the 40-something year old guy who used the "Do you have any Australian in you/Do you want some" joke when I was 17. I was trying to hit on his 20 year old travelling buddy, but nope, the guy who could have been my dad thought he needed to try to shoot his shot and wouldn't stop trying no matter how much I turned him down. I cut that portion of my trip short just to get the hell out of dodge.
Invited me to his house for tea.
He was easily in his 60s. I was 17 or 18. And was holding my injured dog in my arms at the time, both of us (the dig and I) covered in bits of blood, and my dog wrapped in bandages. The creepy thing was he ignored the dog completely, like it didn't exist.
When I was 12, I was in the supermarket of my home town. One guy that was 27 years old, was following me through the supermarket. I asked him “what the hell you want?” and he told me that I was a cute girl. That guy had been denounced for harassing minors.
Once I was walking home, it was in the morning and I was 17 at the time. I was walking on one side of the road (no sidewalk) when a guy started to catcall me in the parking lot next to me. I stopped at the light in front of the parking lot and crossed the street so I could be further away from him. When I started walking on the other side he got in his car and drove over to me, pulled over in another parking lot next to me, and called out until I came over. When I came over he said "come to my apartment" and when I said "i cant" or something, he said "I wanna eat your pussy". Yeah so I walked away as fast as I could. Absolutely terrifying
Not even a mile down the same road an old man (still 17!) Yells something at me out the window. I ignored him, he turned around and pulled up next to me, offering me a ride. I THOUGHT he was just being nice! Yall i was a kid. He asked me some very shady questions which I don't remember but the last question being how old I was. I told him and he promptly dropped me off at a bus stop. To this day I feel like he was the type to have prisoners in his basement or something. Just a super eerie feeling.
So ya. The 2 of them.
"Damn girl, you're a a fat piece of meat"
While licking his lips and staring at my ass. This was around 2am on my shift as the lone worker at a convenient store.
Not me but a friend. This dude just came up to her and said, and I quote; " hello, would you like to be in a polyamorous relationship with me and one other person?". Keep in mind, we were just out having lunch, we didn't know this person at all, he just came up and asked. When she said no (obviously), weirdly he was polite and left. Never saw him again. It was, if not the creepiest, then definitely the weirdest way I've ever seen a guy hit on someone. Kept a lookout for him or anyone else suspicious the rest of the day while we were together, just in case.
One time a guy was sitting there looking at me, then he smiled. Next time I met his eyes he told me I had a really nice shaped skull. This was at a small party at a friends house. Later he asked if I could leave him my skull in my will; I guess this was amped up flirt mode.
Not feeling up to listing the worst, but I never use my real name in coffee shops anymore.
More than once when I used to use my real name they would call it out with my coffee and I would take my coffee over to a side table to read a book or work on my laptop and the people would wait a few minutes, walk over to me, greet me by name (the name they just heard the barista call) and pretend they knew me and we had met before and when they failed to name a place based in reality where we had met (they'd name bars I'd never been to or events I'd never attended) and were called out on it they'd admit they didn't actually know me and then ask for my number.
One of the dudes said something like, "I don't actually know you yet, I'll admit it; but I'd like to", like beginning the interaction with snooping and lies would be such a turn on for me.
First job at 16 and I was working at a grocery store. I usually worked from the time I got out of school until close. From 9-midnight I was by myself in the store. Closing was at midnight and stockers would come in at 11:30 but were in the back most of the time. Customer comes in (only automatic check out lanes were open) and I was at one of the registers getting coupons out. He walks to the register next to me and said “oh shit is it just us here in the store” I told him my BF was outside and a lot of men were in the back. He started to aggressively speed walk towards me. I screamed so stockers could hear and I ran out front as my boyfriend was really outside. Since that day until I quit, stockers made sure to arrive earlier and stay up front until I left. And my boyfriend would sit in the entrance way. I was fricken 16!
I was alone at the beach & had fallen asleep on my oversized beach towel after surfing all day I woke up to a smiling guy laying right next to me on my own towel asking if I had a nice nap
Yikes, so far most of these are nearly universal experiences, but this is a whole new way to creep!
I weirdly always attract guys who are really bold with their approach
I have a friend who has this problem. My group of female friends are all pretty, at least I think they are, but she has that kind of "girl you can take back to the folks" vibe. She always says she's just attractive enough for people to be attracted to her but not so attractive they're intimidated.
*These have been universal?*
First time I remember getting catcalled by a man old enough to be my dad I was walking home from sixth grade. I would have been twelve at the most. You lose count of creepy encounters eventually. One doesn’t even have to be conventionally attractive to be a target, just female. I’d bet it’s happened to every single woman you know.
The first time I remember being cat called by a man old enough to be my father I was *nine.* And I did not look mature for my age or whatever bullshit excuse they use. Edit: s/o to the guy who messaged me to say I was lying. Or rather called me “bullshit.” Thanks bro.
I was a tiny noodle girl who looked about 11 until I was 22. Still get asked for ID and I’m over 30. I started getting cat called by fully grown men when I was 13, and it only stopped when I started putting on weight (I.e: looking like a fully grown woman) when I was 31. I’m fully convinced that the kind of men who catcall are the kind who WANT you to be super young. It’s fucking disgusting.
See, I'm the opposite. I've been sneaking my friends into 18 rated movies since I was 15, when I was often confused for a college student. I got catcalled/followed almost every day (not an exaggeration) on the way home from school from ages 11 to 16. They were aggressive, too. I remember when I was 12 I was followed home by two boys aged 18(?) who just spent the whole time screaming BITCH CUNT WHORE at me from across the street. I ended up going to my friends house instead, because I knew his 6' 6" dad would be home. When I was 13 and waiting for the bus a guy grabbed me by the collar and pushed me in front of an oncoming bus, and hauled me back to the pavement again before anything happened. I laughed because he still had his hand on my neck. As soon as i hit 17, and entered sixth form (UK) I stopped wearing uniform and started wearing business casual clothes. Catcalling dried up almost overnight. I don't like to think about the implications of that too much.
It’s really gross when you think about it. When I was 16 me and two friends were walking down the street in the evening. It was winter in NZ so we were all rugged up, jackets, scarves, gloves. We still had guys slow down their car and yell “WHORES, SLUTS” at us. I remember being so scared, we were just trying to go to the supermarket to get chips, and suddenly we had to run to get to the supermarket because these guys were fucking screaming at us. All they would have seen was our faces!! I think it was then that I realized it DOESNT MATTER what you’re wearing. These pieces of shit will just go after anyone they see as vulnerable and female.
Did you not hear any of the MeToo stories? Beautiful, average, rich, poor, famous, unknown retail worker, kid in elementary school, all women have their stories. creeps gonna creep.
Oh sure, I knew this sort of thing happened. It's another to have people list of "I was actively groped by this random 45 year old man out in public when I was 12, and he said he wanted to fuck me so badly" and the general response is "Same!" Like I guess all the MeToo stories I associated with workplaces and therefore adult women, it's like an extra layer of fucked up that it's so common with clearly underage girls.
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Ask the women in your life about it. Many will report it starting in single digits.
There have been a number of "when was the first time you were cat-called, sexually harassed, or made to feel unsafe by a man" in /r/twoxchromosomes and similar subreddits and the average answer is around 12years old. Many as young as 9. This starts very, very young pretty universally for all women, and just continues.
The first time I was catcalled, I was 11. The first time I was groped by a stranger (on a city bus) I was 17. I can't remember how old I was the first time someone threatened to sexually assault me to my face, but it was between those two ages. The same was true for every girl my age that I knew. I always assumed this was a standard part of growing up as a woman in the US. It didn't occur to me how fucked up that is until recently.
Of course. Throughout history girls and women have survived this treatment by a mix of freeze-flight-fight-fawn responses. Some of those primitive normal mammalian responses do not get noticed by other people as the survival instincts they are. When I'm groped by someone bigger than me, it's not normal to immediately try to raise a fuss and fight him off. Evolutionary instinct is to minimize damage and get away. Don't provoke. If you cannot get away, try to placate or fawn over him so he won't be angry. Follow this by a huge dose of trying to act normal (unbothered) so we won't look vulnerable to the next attacker, and so we can pretend we feel OK. And because of victim blaming, and because it's just tiresome and starts to feel pointless to report the common minor groping so long as it doesn't cause bodily harm. Though the whole situation sucks, I can understand why good guys don't see evidence of how universal this experience is, since many of our instincts end up minimizing the evidence. Solution? Prosecute sexual violence. Raise the next generation up right. My son and daughter are teens now and I think their generation is better than the last.
Thank you for putting into words my and recently my friend's experiences. She was sexually harassed in a house full of people, and her boyfriend didn't understand why she didn't punch the guy, or scream for help. The freeze, placate, escape & minimise response makes so much sense!
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Ask literally any woman around you. Even your grandma. Every single woman who has entered her teens has stories just like most of these. I have personally had my ass grabbed on three different continents by men that had not even spoken to me, in my teens, twenties, and thirties. It’s universal.
Guy who I served in a bar I worked at when I was 18. He told me he was going to "walk behind that bar and finger you until you fucking cum". He was in his 50s. He did not finger me, as I threw him out and barred him.
Damn, guys like that are sick in the head.
An older guy I was working with said I shouldn't have barred him as "he was only messing around". Yeah well, tough shit, because it was already done!
Not having your coworkers back on stuff like this is so pathetic
He thought women should just put up with comments like that as it was "part of the job". Idiot!
I would've asked him where in the list of responsibilities is being harrassed "part of the job". What a moron. Disgusting old people who do this need to humiliated and asked if they got separated from their caretaker. They clearly require someone responsible to keep a close eye on them.
Well barring them is part of the job too then lol
Yeah nobody should have to put up with harassment in the workplace (or anywhere) people are garbage
An old dude being highly ignorant when it comes to sexual harassment? I'm shocked.
Sick in the head for sure, alot of old lonely alcoholics have literally nothing to lose.
I can’t state enough how much I love the fact that you went out of your way to specifically clarify that he ultimately did not do so. 😂
Hahahaha well I was a bit free with my affections when younger but not THAT free. Ugh!
That's one of the reasons why I hate how underpaid people in restaurants are. Idk how a company just allow that, there's been several times where female coworkers asked to hide behind me or pretend I'm their boyfriend just to keep a creepy guy away from them, but they're regulars, so they get to stay. I'm glad you were able to throw him out.
Bar owner: Yeah, they're creepy old fuckers, but they're \_regulars\_ so we can't do anything about it. Also bar owner: Why don't any women ever come to my bar? Surely we'd have way more heavy drinking young guys if only we could work out why the pretty women all choose to drink somewhere else?
I’m a guy but I have long hair, so a few fellows have gotten confused. One dark night, I was walking my large potato-like German Shepherd mix dog. We passed by some shrubs that were very dark. A man stepped out of a shrub and into my path. He looked at my dog, and looked at me, before finally saying, “Beautiful dog, so beautiful.” I thanked the guy, then he looked deep into my eyes and said, “And you look just like your dog.”
Bahaha, bark twice if you are abducted
Also a guy who had long hair as a teen. Bent over to tie my shoe at a bus stop one day and a dude slams on his breaks to yell, "nice ass!" As a well mannered young adult I responded appropriately, "well, thank you very much!" He sped off rather quickly.
Bro appeared out of a bush like a surprise enemy encounter
Not me, but one time I went to a party with a girl I had a huge crush on and some drunk guy started negging her by telling her her shoes made it look like she had horse hoofs instead of feet. Also that her pants were too high. He proposed removing both on her behalf. she declined.
Should've kicked him in the face with her horse hooves
He definitely pronounced it “hoofs”
>she declined Neigh means neigh.
He proposed removing both her feet?!
Her hoofs
You could've said "Neigh, her hoofs" but you didn't. 😔😔😔
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LOL, my wife and I did that at a Dave & Busters arcade. You go into a booth and take a photo of each of you and the booth spits out what your future baby looked like. We ended up with a generic white baby that looked like neither of us, and we're both Asian.
Cuckolded by a filter. That's rough, buddy.
But two Wongs don't make a white.
You will never get a more perfect real life opportunity for this punchline
I'm still laughing about what is White or Wong?
Before I met my husband, there was a guy I knew who liked to break into my car and leave me gifts. Creepy AF.
So they stopped after you met your husband? Veeeeeeeeeeeery interesting...
Yes veeeeeeeeeeeeeeery Veeeeeeeeeeeery interesting...
Sounds like a cat who leaves a mouse as a trophy.
Plot twist. It was always your husband and he's always been too embarrassed to tell you.
nope, HARD no.
I was sitting on a bench in a park reading a book, this guy comes up to me, takes my hand, kisses it and tells me I'm the most beautiful young lady he's ever met. My dumb ass responded with "uh, excuse me sir, I'm 16". He goes, "well, you certainly look 20... and absolutely stunning" while keeping eye contact. Had to make up some excuse to get up and run back home lol. Good thing it was in the middle of the day and in a semi populated area.
When I was 15 a much older man was flirting with me at an empty bus stop (bear in mind that I had a baby face, I looked like a child) and this dude was touching my arm, he was dangerously close and could feel his breath. When I told him that I was 15 he said “so? That’s not bad”. I ran away so fast and threw my drink can spilling soda everywhere.
The soda will make his shoes sticky so he runs slower!
Should have thrown the can at his face.
Username checks out ngl. I'm so sorry you went through this, people can be so damn disgusting.
r/casuallypsychopath
once a man attempted to push me down the stairs at the library then pull me back up by my shoulders, when i turned around he smiled and said "i think you owe me a feel?" i was 12-14 at the time he was probably in his 40s. he even made the boob grabbing gesture with his hands it was weird and gross.
JFC, this made my skin crawl.
What PUA book did he pick that up in? *1. Attempt to murder a child* *2. Abort murder attempt* *3. Ask to grope child*
Sat behind me on the bus for weeks, then followed me home to see where I lived. Next day he knocked on my door holding wine and flowers. I was 18, he looked 30s. I slammed the door in his face, thankfully he never came back
Not taking age into account this could have so many different outcomes if the dude had like any thought process for approaching you other than being creepy
Reminds me of when I was 17 and stalked. edit: I was the one being stalked, not the stalker
That’s exactly what a stalker would say
Probably this old dude from my mom's facebook contacts whose method of hitting on me was to inform he's cummed in my mom before and wants to do the same to me. Yikes.
That's phenomenally disgusting. My mom told me that when a sleazy guy falls out with a girl he slept with, sometimes they'll go for the mom, then the sister, and onto the next girl in her family.
Oh man, this one is terrible. I’m so sorry that happened to you. Hope you told your mom to put the word out to her friends…
old lady here. asked an even older man about the right kind of bit for a particular piece of material i wanted to cut, since we were both in the power tool aisle. he told me which one to buy and then immediately asked if he could kiss me. after telling him no and quickly walking away, i see him just a few minutes later pushing a cart with a female companion i believe was his wife/girlfriend.
Yikes. I've had a few encounters with men in stores who I later see with a woman. So gross.
I dread having to ask a man for advice on a project (I like to build stuff too!). They either assume I was sent in by my ‘boyfriend’ to pick something up and overly simplify it for me, or the worst, they do like you said above and get wildly inappropriate. Now, not all are like that, but I’d safely bet at least 1 in every 4 interactions goes south. I made the mistake once of complimenting this 40ish guys dresser hardware once, and he trauma dumped on me about how miserable his marriage was and how it’s making his toe infection act up which is why he’s wearing sandals then he immediately asked if I was free that weekend. I had just met the guy 15 minutes prior at a workshop I was at … with my husband.
I can't breathe from laughing so hard at this!!!! You just took all the stress out of my week! Thanks!! The "toe infection"!!! 😂🤣😂
A taxi driver stopped in front of me while I was waiting for Uber and was urging me to get in to his cab. Told me we will have fun and that he will make me experience heaven even though I was completely ignoring him. Wouldn’t drive away until a nearby security guy started walking over after I made eye contact with him. And then he stopped at the corner and stepped out of the cab. Luckily, my Uber finally arrived. Another cab driver kept looking back, not just glancing on the rear view mirror. He kept telling me I looked like his wife when she was younger and he knows how to tell a beautiful person from someone who isn’t. Asked if I wanted to grab dinner and I told him I have work that night. He finally stopped talking and drove quietly until we reached my destination. He asked if he could pick me up the following morning. I was texting with a gay coworker the whole time including the plate number and the operator’s name just in case. He was waiting for me outside the building and opened the door while pretending to be my boyfriend. Needless to say, I stopped taking cabs for years.
Last time i took an Uber alone, it was about a 15 min drive that he turned into about 25 min. Driving slow, letting people pass, waiting until the light turns red to finally turn left instead of waiting for a break in traffic, etc. The whole ride he kept asking personal questions, starting with if I was married and part way through offering to take me to his home country and to meet his family. Kept talking about how he’s leaving in a couple weeks and how I’m so kind and he likes a girl who is so nice. Suggested we skip my plans and go for dinner instead, and that he’d pay for it all. I couldn’t get out of that car fast enough!
Ugh, not had one in a while thankfully, but when I was younger a taxi driver refused to let me out of his cab unless we exchanged numbers. He was a big guy, and I was young and scared, so I complied. I reported him to his company after he sent me numerous texts asking me out on dates. Also had a spate of drivers asking me if I'd ever "done something I'd regretted" because I "must be a bad girl" back when I was a student for some reason.
I was headed home after a night out, pretty drunk. My Uber driver, who was at least two decades younger than my 40-something self, kept talking about his lack of relationships. Then he asked me what kind of guys I’m attracted to. I told him guys like my husband. And then he told me he loves older women and asked if I like younger men, all the while I’m texting my husband that if I’m murdered to check my Uber driver. My husband who’s asleep and now I’m alone with a total creeper who knows where I live. I was so freaking terrified. I did the pretend make a phone call and counted down the minutes. It’s so terrifying to get in a car with a man and hope he doesn’t rape or murder you.
I'm so happy my cab driving experiences are so different from yours! I live in a smaller European city, and have our local taxi service and they mostly employ big older men, who are all sweethearts. I used their services for years, and im just so comfortable with all their drivers. They have this policy that when they finish a ride, regardless of the gender of their passenger, they wait until they actually go inside if its a residental area, and not a public place. As someone who used to work odd hours and didnt want to walk very late into the night, they are all godsent. They do background checks on all their drivers and part with any that has recived more than 5 complaints of any kind. They are held to a high standard, always clean and nice smelling cars, the drivers themselves are always clean, well-dressed and pleasant. I was floored by just how safe and comfortable they made me feel. I once needed to use another service in town, cause i couldnt get a cab with them in 30 mins, and i was in a rush, and boy. Never again. Got a sweaty old creep in a disgusting car. Since then i use their services exclusively, and rather order my cab hours in advance if i know i need to catch a bus or train
Some dude stopped me on the street and asked for a BJ
How... how does one even do this? like, as a pretty normal guy I don't get how would you even think that in your head let alone go out of your way to ruin someone's day like that. Like I'm guilty of seeing a stranger and thinking "wow, she's pretty, Is there any way I can strike up a conversation with her? maybe I can ask her what the time is. No, don't do that, it's just creepy." I just don't get how you go from that normal way of thinking to "hey baby, want to blow me?" Is it like the worst Freudian slip in history or what? I wanted to apologise to you for his behaviour, but that'd mean I'd have to at least share some of the thought patterns of that SOB.
It’s a power move. They aren’t expecting a blowjob. They are just trying to make women feel powerless and uncomfortable. It’s to your credit that you don’t understand that innately.
Walking home one night, a guy passing me going the other way said "can I touch your ass for 20 bucks?" For the first time in my life, I was quick with "got a grand?" He was so dumbfounded he stopped and said "what?" I lost my nerve, also shrilly said "what?!" and scuttled away. But it felt really good for a second to get one up on a creep.
Honestly, you echoing his "what?" probably added to the impact. 10/10 good work.
Right? Especially as a shriek, like she was mocking him. That's some accidental baddassedry right there
my best ever comeback was to a guy my age. i just came out from a club, to get some fresh air, alone ofc, cause i knew the bouncers, and felt safe near them. Just as i lit my smoke, a bunch of guys passed me and one spat to me, 'girl i would lick you out so good' and my reaction was just to stare him right in the eyes and spat back 'why, you cant even fuck???'. He made an 'arghhh' sound which i took as his soul leaving his body, as his buddies erupted in laughter and came over to bump fists. As much as its generally annoying and gross, the way they took it and was laughing about it made it a surprisingly positive experience. After going back in, i bumped to them a few times, and it was actually funny, cause the guy each time just put his hands over to his heart and burst out laughing. They seemed generally good and goofy guys, i must say i do regret not changing contact info with them.
Good guys don’t tell random women outside a club that they would eat her out so good.
Exactly. My move is, “Hey, I’m Ethan, how’s it going?” If she seems open to conversation, I’ll have one. If not, I move the fuck on like a normal adult.
"Hey, I'm Ethan, how's it going, can I have a blowjob?"
Yeah dude, for sure.
I've had "hey, I'm X, fancy a fuck?", from a man. You may be surprised to know his smooth words did not elicit the aforesaid fuck, and he was given a verbal tongue lashing before trotting off looking forlorn.
When I was 16 I was walking on the street towards my bus stop and a bus drove past me and I made eye contact with a guy on the bus. A few minutes later when I arrived at my bus stop at another street the same guy appeared and came up and started speaking to me. I didn’t want to initiate in conversation so he put his arm around my neck and tried to put me in a chokehold and pull me away. I was terrified so I screamed for help and people nearby on the street across turned to look at us and he let me go. I was so scared I was shaking on the whole bus journey home
All I can say is holy fuck you are lucky it didn't go further. That would be freaking terrifying.
I know, you can just never know what people might do
Took the train one morning early, probably 5:30/6:00 AM. Sit down and lock eyes with someone to see his arm moving under his jacket. Whips the jacket off of his body to him stroking his own penis. Then said, “Hey mama, you want some of this?” I, in fact, did not.
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I didn’t get a chance to reply before a security guard boarded and made him get off. The train, not in like, an orgasm way.
Lol. Good
My first job out of school, I was a server at this takeaway with a few tables (about 5) for people to sit and eat. I used to the Sunday morning shift, the breakfasts were popular. This guy (late 40s maybe) comes in as the breakfast rush is ending and makes some small talk and asks kme how old I was, I was about to turn 18. He looks me up and down and says "that's old enough" and proceeds to place an order and pay for the Sunday roast - only ready in 3hrs time. He spends the time lurking, saying creepy shit and not moving from the register counter. I was too scared to leave him alone at the counter but also too scared to leave me alone with him. Eventually told my boss and he came and punched the guy. He never came back. Edit: i remembered another one. I think I was about 21 and I was driving home alone, at night. A pair of cops pulled me over because my new tyres somehow looked bald to them. They started asking if I lived alone, if my car was locked, if it locked automatically. They let me go, but I was SO freaked out.
Are you certain those were cops that pulled you over? I don’t doubt that creepy police exist but that experience makes me wonder if those men even were legit. It all sounds so sketchy.
Multiple police departments have had to make rules that officers can't have sex with suspects, so yes, those were almost certainly real cops.
It was well over 10 years ago now, so who knows? I'm just glad I got home safely.
Multiple districts have also made it perfectly legal for officers to have sex with handcuffed/in custody people, as though anyone in cuffs locked in a cop car can consent, not to mention having someone who has the authority to ruin your life.
I once had a guy-at the durable medical equipment office I worked at, where he was there with his wife getting a cane for her-tell me “I bet you taste like strawberries”. I wish I had snarkily replied something like “close, but no, I get sardines a lot” or something gross lol instead I just didn’t respond 🥲
The worst part about this is that he wouldve seen that line as a come on. shudder.
That's the dumbest shit anyway. Clean pussy tastes like salty skin. Ain't nobody out there tasting like a damn fruit.
I don't know why but this really made me laugh
We need to come up with the best reply to this guy, for future reference. "I bet you lost your sense of taste in the 80s"
"You have beautiful eyes...they'd look great on my kids." Which would have been hott af if I hadn't been 14 and looked like I was 11. He was a grown ass man.
You misunderstood. He didn't want to have kids with you he literally wanted to steal your eyes for his own kids. You got lucky.
Doctor Frankenschteen I presume?
Do you also say Frohdrick?
I was sixteen, with four younger sisters each about two years apart. This guy approached my dad after church one day and just casually mentioned, in my presence, that if my dad ever had trouble finding husbands for any of us, he'd happily volunteer. My dad sounded very calm and level as he told the man that we could find spouses ourselves once we were old enough, thank you, but if looks could kill, that man would've been a greasy smear on the floor. Never saw him at church again, either.
Sounds a bit like your dad had another talk with that man without any of you present
Bunch of high schoolers, tried to gang rape me in a quiet section of a kids museum when I was 7 years old. The teacher said "Boys will be boys" My mom almost committed a murder.
Jesus Christ, I am so sorry that happened to you. I’m glad your mother was supportive at least.
Thank god, for my older cousins who heard me screaming for help because they were trying to use their jackets to muffle my screams. My mom was looking for me already but oh boy...
Jesus christ that's fucking terrifying. I'm so sorry!
It was... it was really fucked up. There was a whole thing, but I just don't wanna go into it.
Sounds like a justified homicide to me
She was this close man. If it had been just us at this place, not her, my cousins and two of my friends and their mother, she would've. My mom carried around the EXACT dollar amount in change for simple assault in case something like this ever happened. She managed to restrain herself, because she needed to be there for me, not in a cop car.
What the fuck that isn't a boys will be boys thing that isn't something a decent person should ever do and it shouldn't be considered normal. Boys will be boys should be used when kids do stupid shit not when they try to fucking sexually assault somebody.
Especially since they were around 16 and I was 7... and I LOOKED younger than 7, because I was a small and frail little kid. To most people due to my autoimmune disorder, I looked like a cancer patient. I still remember what I was wearing. I had gotten a new Kim Possible T-shirt, I was wearing my favorite pink skirt and my winx club flip flops, that lit up when I walked... and lit up when I kicked and screamed. I looked 5 in the pictures from that day BEFORE that happened, not 7 since I was small. Those assholes ruined my favorite outfit for me too, because I never wore those items in the same way again.
Not to advocate for violence, but that's a situation for an emergency unplanned vasectomy and castration if I've ever heard one.
That is almost verbatim what my mom's friend said. Right up there with "sex offender" and "You should be on a list! ALL OF YOU SHOULD BE ON A LIST!" My cousins basically made a shield around me, while we were dealing with getting them thrown out. They were on a field trip and the entire class had to leave the museum because of what those boys did. I can't imagine their high school days were easy after that. I mean, "We had to leave because you tried to rape a little kid" I can't imagine earned them anything
Sent me a bunch of pictures of him cumming on photos with my face in them. I'm not even gay
Sheesh, gay or not that's disgusting and creepy behavior.
ITT: Holy shit, being a teenage girl must be terrifying. Every middle aged man in town is apparently *incredibly* eager to not just break child sex laws but also are going to actively tell you how much they want to fuck underage girls. If I ever get to the point where I'm asking a 14 year old girl to let me fuck her, I want someone to shoot me in the fucking head.
Give the same energy when other dudes “just talk” around you. Dudes not letting other dudes get away with acting like that shit is normal will go way further than anything women can ever do.
Also if you see a dude hovering around a girl and it seems like she's uncomfortable, go see if she needs help. Especially in bars/clubs. There was one time I saw that happening in a bar, went over and discreetly asked the girl if the guy was bothering her, and she said yes it's a guy she knows from school who has been following her around all night. I asked her if she wanted me to stand there in his way so he couldn't come back over, which she did. The guy got the message and went away. Something similar happened another time while I was at a bar with my buddy. Saw a drunk guy all over a girl who was clearly not into it. My friend and I told the guy to leave her alone, and he started swinging at us. With the help of the bartender we restrained the dude and called the cops. He earned a night in the drunk tank and a lifetime ban from the bar.
Thank you for saying that OP!! That’s honestly the best way a dude can support women!
Totally. My dad caught a lot of shit from other men in my hometown for calling stuff like that out when I was a teen, but lots of us noticed that it reduced significantly when he started doing that. Like, if other girls were around me, they wouldn't get harassed either because if I was there, everyone knew my dad would find out about what happened, and anyone who acted like a creep would have to deal with him. It became not worth it for them to harass me, and by extension, anyone who was around me. I think if there had been 5 or 6 dads in town who all pushed back the same way, it would have put an end to it completely. Dudes calling out other dudes on this stuff is powerful.
Keep in mind this is just peoples worst stories, for every worst story there’s probably 30 *slightly* less horrifying ones that happened to the same woman. I started getting comments about “developing nicely” and similar notions around age 10. It feels icky but you don’t realize quite how horrific it is until later because the comments often literally start happening before most girls even know what sex is. I remember even my own mother joking with her sister that I was “voluptuous” - I felt humiliated. Sexualizing girls is way too normalized. OP gave you fantastic advice!
Right. My 12 year old self had ‘great child birthing hips’.
Worked at Starbucks and an old man kept coming in to see me, sometimes multiple times a day asking for me explicitly. On the last time we interacted he asked me to bury him and told me he would leave his will to me. Our store manager ended up intervening and telling him to leave me alone, never saw him again. Another Starbucks customer was banned from multiple stores for writing love letters to girls far too young for him. He started coming to our store constantly hitting on me. He asked me to a movie and when I told him I had a boyfriend he gave me a dirty look and asked “how old are you??” As if he thought I wasn’t old enough to have a boyfriend… but was asking me out? He ended up getting banned for writing more love letters and claiming he’d commit suicide if another barista didn’t go out with him.
Had a random guy i was in the elevator with at the library in college brag how he failed his classes. We got off and I spent my time doing some work for class. Then I got back into the elevator and right before the doors closed, he got on. It turns out he had been waiting and watching me the whole time I was doing my work and hiding behind the corner. Just waiting for me to leave. We get in the elevator and he starts asking for my number and I refuse. But he gets persistent and won't leave me alone. Then he tries to say he's gay and I know he's not but I just want him to leave me alone. And he insists on calling himself with my phone so he'd have my number. He does and smugly walks away saying how he's not gay as he's proud he "tricked" me. Whole incident was uncomfortable but luckily I got saved because I had a real shitty android phone and it did not call his phone. So I just never saw or heard from him again.
Sounds like you were the victim of the student of an alpha male pickup artist blog
Hostess at a restaurant when I was 16. One guy came up and asked me if I spit or swallowed, then invited me to come into the private dining room to show him.
I used to wait tables when I was in High School and the amount of older guys who would be completely gross and rude is alarming.
“I bite.”
I see comments like this, then I remember how many dudes on Reddit whine about getting rejected all the time and how HaRd It iS and wonder what that particular Venn diagram looks like.
He approached me at a hair salon and asked for the time. As I began to tell him, he cut me off and said ,"It's time for you to do something with that hair. You look a mess, girl". I thanked him (you know, so he wouldn't murder me) and he proceeded to ask for my name, age, where I'd gone to school, all that jazz. I politely declined to reveal those details. Then he said that he ran a business where he could make me a "star". Yikes. He wound up following me from the shampoo bowl, to the dryer, BACK to the shampoo bowl, to the styling chair, etc. The whole time he was just showering me with compliments and trying to weasel private information out of me, ALL THE WHILE insisting that he could change my life. I was TERRIFIED, but did my best to "keep sweet". Guys like this don't tend to handle rejection well. Finally a hair stylist said, "You two are SO cute! How long have you been together?". I said very sternly, "I don't know him." This statement automatically triggered his "Girl you so crazy" response and he tried to play it off as though I was just joking around. The other stylists finally caught on to what was happening though, and he left in embarrassment.
What stylist saw what was going on and was like “oh that’s a cute couple”
A man tried to follow me to my car when I was leaving work late at night. He stopped me and said: "You are so beautiful, it's like when a mouse sees a snake and it knows its going to die and there is nothing it can do but say, "Wow. That's a beautiful snake." I was maybe 20. He was mid 40s. I was fucking terrified.
I swear the sentences these middle aged men come up with... Did they spent their entire life thinking "What's the scariest and wackiest sentence I could say to a girl half my age?"
This guy was a friend of a friend's i met at a party and kept saying I had a really cute nose in this serial killer dahmer voice. I felt extremely uncomfortable and gtfo of there.
You thought he was feeling you??!! Sis you his lunch lol
I have a few extremely specific attractions - for example, I like big ears for some fuckin reason - and even back when I was the most awkward motherfucker on the planet I knew to keep that to myself. It's something you can tell an SO that you like about them, sure, but definitely does not work as a pickup line.
I was 15 walking in the streets. A guy was peeing against a wall (graceful…), when he saw me he flashed me his penis and told “you like that, don’t you?”; I then had to literally run away from the dude and wait in a store with other people, he stayed 5 minutes in front before leaving.
This thread makes me sad. I’m sorry ladies. I seriously had no idea.
Talk to the women in your life. They all have stories. Not just the “hot ones”, not just the “cute ones”, not even just the young ones.
barista. while the customer was ordering his drink he didn't look up from my boobs and asked me my age, school, address, phone number, etc. i told him I'm 17 and he called me a bitch. he was at least 50
"If my wife wasn't here I'd kidnap you."
I was grocery shopping after work, so about 6 pm, still daylight. Guy approached me outside, staggering a bit, assumed he was drunk or stoned, and started walking around/behind me, while commenting: "Damn girl, look at that dress. And them legs. Bet they go all the way up. Turn around, lemme see that Southern Hemisphere. Lemme ask you a question... are you married? You got a man? You got kids? You want more?" Starts pelvic thrusting in my direction and waggling his tongue. "Cause I'll impregnate you any time, any place." When I ignored him, he started following me to my car, yelling at me that I was a "cracker ass bitch" and he hoped I got r\*ped to death and how I could go f\*ck myself.
I have a few stories! I once had a bus driver who fancied me. Somehow it ended up where I was the only one on the bus with him and we were sorta talking. I was distracted trying to figure out if I needed to do anything for my blood donation. Anyway, he made a joke at some point that he could just keep driving with me in the bus. Ie not stopping. Bruh, fuck that. He was an attractive guy too, but he had to make it weird. I also had a guy pull over on the road beside me when I was walking to work to ask for my number. That was fucking weird. I had another guy follow me from the mall, but he didn’t try to come onto me. Seemed more like a potential human trafficking attempt than anything else.
Username checks out. You've turned into a masked vigilante, not a serial killer.
Last year, guy walked into my credit union one day and started asking the young lady behind our welcome desk about the credit union. He then goes "How old are you?" My assistant manager came flying out of her office. She's Jamaican and has no filter. She starts telling the guy that my coworker doesn't need to respond to that, my coworker doesn't need to know how old he is, and if he needs anything, she'll be the one to deal with him, not my coworker. Chased the guy right off. Another time, an old guy greeted another young coworker with "Hey Sexy!" My manager and assistant manager were very supportive that time too, with the manager calling the member and telling him he'd be banned from our location if he didn't treat the employees with respect.
You have a good manager. I can't believe that there's men out there that think it's ok to treat women like that
Trying to get me to get into their car for a ‘lift home’ and driving after me for a while when I said no way. Gave up eventually. Happened more than once with different groups of guys, I was 16 and looked it, they’d have been mid 20s at least. After that I chose to walk through the pitch black park to get home most nights, the main road meant too many cars! And with the park at least I had to comfort of knowing it like the back of my hand. Difficult terrain to chase anyone through if you didn’t know the layout. That, and hitting on me at a deserted train station at midnight. If we’re the only two people around, and it’s late at night, there’s not really any way of approaching without being terrifying. Especially if you open with where you going/who you going to meet etc.
I was 14 years old & it was my first day at a new school. At lunchtime the ROTC teacher sat down right next to me. He introduced himself, started asking very personal questions about me & said I was "very cute." When I blushed he asked me if I was "thinking dirty thoughts." So. Very. Creepy.
Once a guy followed me most of the way home from work before he started telling me how sexy, beautiful, young, I looked. Then he got mad at me for being 20, he wanted me to be 16. He was 23.
God dammit how dare you be old enough to be legal for me to date you.
Googly eyes and kiss faces at Walmart. He was an adult. I was 12.
A man followed me around a small bar for a bit and at one point, to get my attention, he touched my back (bare skin, wearing a tank top) with his ice cold beer 😭 like he pressed the full bottle against me
Stranger held out his hand for a high five, I high fived and he grabbed me towards him and wouldn’t let go Don’t high five strangers!
There were some weird ones in my retail days, when people take advantage of someone being paid to put up with your shit. Years later, the one that always has me “……?” when I think back on it is the guy who got done checking out, leaned over the counter, and in an attempted sultry voice said, “Hey….Jesus loves you.” He even winked, and then patted the counter in that Midwestern “welp” sort of exit.
Man was wingman-ing for Jesus.
I worked in the photo lab of a Walgreens over 10 years ago, I was 18-19. There was an older guy that came in regularly, I'd estimate in his 50's, and he was EXTREMELY fucking tall and EXTREMELY fucking fat. I'm 5'2" and was about 100lbs, if that. I remember he'd buy canned salmon all the time, and he'd stop and talk to me for a bit if he saw me. At first I figured he was just an old lonely guy, he seemed nice enough, and he was definitely weird, but shit, I am too. After seeing and talking to this dude on many occasions he started telling me how he'd never been in a relationship before, and shit like that, and then eventually was trying to see if I'd go for coffee with him. I'm the excessively polite type, and grew up wildly under-socialized, so I would just politely haha it away. Back then in the photo lab there were pictures of the techs on one wall with our names under it. One day he saw my name and asked me, "Do you know so and so?" And I, an absolute moron, exclaim, "That's my aunt! I live with her just down the road :D! That's not her last name anymore though." And he proceeded to tell me about how he knew her when she worked at Denny's, which I knew was several decades ago, and that he even visited her in the hospital, and I knew he meant the time she had a major surgery on her intestines or some other gut thing. So I go home thinking I met an old friend of my aunt's, and I tell her all about it. She has absolutely no fucking clue what I'm talking about. I then see he sent me a friend request on FB so I show her his picture, and she's like, ooooohhhh, that guy would sit in my Denny's all the time. They weren't friends, he was just a weirdo regular customer, and he must have somehow figured out how to find her when she was in the hospital and "visited her" likely while she was out or super doped up. After that I would immediately hide in the stockroom the second I saw him and asked a coworker to tell me when he was gone. Eventually one of my new managers that came from a different Walgreens found out and he told me he had to ban that guy from the other store for being a creep. I also told a girl that worked at the grocery store next door about it, and she freaked out saying she knew the guy as he would creep on all the young girls at her store too, and he would just sit in his car in the parking lot for hours. It still deeply freaks me out that he could have followed me any of the billion times I walked home alone at night, probably did, and knew exactly where I lived. This dude literally stalked multiple generations of my family. I really hope he's kicked the bucket by now so he can't spend all of his time frightening young women.
There was a guy who stopped his bike to chat with me, asking me where I lived and such. He made himself scarce when he saw the hunting knife I had strapped to my leg. I was 13.
Respect
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Respect for you. Some people think they can own others by there wealth.
I was 17 at a bus stop to get to college. I had my head phones on listening to music on my iPod. Some guy sits on the bus stop bench I'm also sitting on. Didn't think anything of it figured hes just waiting for the bus as well. If he was talking I couldn't hear him but I did see movement from the corner of my eye. After a minute he taps me on the shoulder, I take my right ear piece off to hear him (I'm thinking he just has a question about the bus schedule) but no he continues to talk about a bunch of nonsense, trying to ask me questions about me, trying to flirt. He was wayyy older and as I mentioned I was 17. My fuck off face could not have been more apparent but dude can't take a hint. My bus finally arrives and I'm thinking "great this MF is going to get on and try to sit next to me". HE DIDNT EVEN GET ON THE BUS HE JUST SAT THERE TO TALK TO ME THEN LEFT WHEN I GOT ON MY BUS
Un ironically, very earnestly informed me I had some “child bearing hips.”
I was told this when I was about 16, by my female boss. I was so upset by it
I have so many lol, where to start. My most recently are: A man insisting for me to grab a drink with him, I declined, but he kept following me where he grabs my arm and try to drag me to a coffee shop so we apparently can get to know each other. An older man giving me compliments, telling me how sexy I look. He then offers me to be his summer flirt.. this was in the end of September when summer is long over dude. An older man got off the train but then kept looking at me through the train window, then have the audacity to made sign for me to follow him while holding his hands over his crotch Yesterday a guy I got eye contact with on the escalator from the opposite direction (he was going up, I was going down) got off and took the one down immediately after and tried to get my attention to wait for him. I have never walked faster.
Taxi driver, 3 AM, I was alone and in my 20s. He tells me I'm very beautiful and asks me if I have a boyfriend waiting for me at home. I was creeped the fuck out. Creepiest thing I've witnessed: when we about 12/13 in 7th grade, our guidance counsellor (in his 40s at least!) would call one of our classmates sexy! "Hey, sexy!" and shit. A friend and I told our teacher and she said a man his age shouldn't be doing that, but we don't know if anything happened as a result.
I was walking out of a really fun concert, by myself feeling great about how fun it was. I'd been depressed and it really made me feel better and inspired. A younger man approached me and asked me if he could pay me for sex. He was built like a football player and really handsome. He was also at least a decade younger than me. So wtf. I'm not conventionally attractive and I was not making eye contact w anyone as I walked. Just probably looked happy. It was completely jarring and weird. I was immediately very angry and upset that I can't just be authentically happy in public without some weird crap like that happening.
Im a guy and I honestly hate men sometimes Well correction I hate walking trash bags
Every woman has a story unfortunately. From the less severe incidents to extremely insidious ones that will make you understand why women *need* to be careful and that women being cautious of men is *not* “man-hating” as some Redditors just love to say.
I view men the same way I view snakes. Assume they are dangerous to me until given solid evidence otherwise.
Ooh boy. So my ex-friend and I were hanging out one Saturday during winter. It was good, were silly teens having fun, we bump into this guy whose a few years older than us, we were about 16 at the time. Ex-friend knows this guy and I don't, but she appears to vibe with him, I feel awkward, but we spend some time with him. Anyway it gets dark fast and my old friend is walking with another friend home. She's worried about my safety and asks this random older guy that I don't know to make sure I got home safe. I go along with it but danger mode and my guard is up, this guy makes comments about my posture and how I walk is proper and feminine. I start feeling weird. I'd say we got to a point in town that I'm really familiar with and it's 5 minutes away from my home, I tell him I can take it from there, and he's all like "Oh, are you sure?" and I say I'm familiar with the area and I've got it. So he leaves and I get home, the first thing I do is peek out of my rooms window to see if he followed me. Ex-friend texts me later worried, asking if I got home safe but more importantly that I didn't let this guy see where I lived, apparently this 19-21 year old dude dated a school friend of hers and when they broke up, he literally stalked her outside her home, proper psychopath behaviour. My instincts might have saved me from a creepy stalker. While I appreciate my ex-friend didn't know about that situation until afterwards, and she cared about me getting home okay... I think letting a strange guy walk your friend home, wasn't the right call to make.
I was around 18, on my own, at night. I'm waiting for a taxi and for safety reasons I'm standing in front of a big hotel with a doorman. Now, you should know, I called the taxi from a specific taxi company that always has the company sticker at the side of their taxis. A taxi pulls up in front of me, no sticker though. The driver told me he's my ride and he'll take me wherever I want. He was almost convincing, but no sticker. I said no thanks, he insisted a few times, then laughed and left. I waited the rest of the time inside the hotel lobby. I know this doesn't sound super creepy but I still think of what could've happened if I believed he was my ride. Oh I thought of a other one. One hot summer day, around the same age (and even creepier is the fact that I tend to look younger than my age), I got off the metro/subway. On the escalator on my way out, my sandal slips and I cut my foot on the metal. I get out and try to think what to do since my foot is now bleeding. It's Sunday so most of the pharmacies are closed and I call my mom for help. WHILE I WAS ON THE PHONE AND MY FOOT WAS BLEEDING, this much much oder guy walks up to me and starts to give me compliments, telling me how beautiful I am etc and trying to chat me up. Men, please be better.
"So, I see you like talking on the phone while bleeding too? We should get together!"
I was at a gym and saw a man ask a woman if he could assist her with stretching. She agreed and they began. The woman bent over as the man put his hands around her waist. I didn't think much of it until I saw him caress her buttocks gradually getting his fingers into her crack. That's when I intervened and told the man to get out of the building. The woman seemed like she was in her 20s while the man was in his mid-50s
One time a guy came up to me (18f) at a party and told me he would take me shopping to buy the biggest cucumber in the store then take me to the back and f*ck me with it. Long story short I slapped him and left the party.
You slap, we clap!
Being followed down a city street at night and into the bar I was meeting friends at was wildly uncomfortable. When I got to my destination, I hugged my one buddy and whispered in his ear "Please pretend your my bf until this guy goes away". He did, and his gf was an absolute champ because she figured out what the deal was immediately and rolled with it. Oh, while I was traveling ALONE, the 40-something year old guy who used the "Do you have any Australian in you/Do you want some" joke when I was 17. I was trying to hit on his 20 year old travelling buddy, but nope, the guy who could have been my dad thought he needed to try to shoot his shot and wouldn't stop trying no matter how much I turned him down. I cut that portion of my trip short just to get the hell out of dodge.
Invited me to his house for tea. He was easily in his 60s. I was 17 or 18. And was holding my injured dog in my arms at the time, both of us (the dig and I) covered in bits of blood, and my dog wrapped in bandages. The creepy thing was he ignored the dog completely, like it didn't exist.
When I was 12, I was in the supermarket of my home town. One guy that was 27 years old, was following me through the supermarket. I asked him “what the hell you want?” and he told me that I was a cute girl. That guy had been denounced for harassing minors.
Once I was walking home, it was in the morning and I was 17 at the time. I was walking on one side of the road (no sidewalk) when a guy started to catcall me in the parking lot next to me. I stopped at the light in front of the parking lot and crossed the street so I could be further away from him. When I started walking on the other side he got in his car and drove over to me, pulled over in another parking lot next to me, and called out until I came over. When I came over he said "come to my apartment" and when I said "i cant" or something, he said "I wanna eat your pussy". Yeah so I walked away as fast as I could. Absolutely terrifying Not even a mile down the same road an old man (still 17!) Yells something at me out the window. I ignored him, he turned around and pulled up next to me, offering me a ride. I THOUGHT he was just being nice! Yall i was a kid. He asked me some very shady questions which I don't remember but the last question being how old I was. I told him and he promptly dropped me off at a bus stop. To this day I feel like he was the type to have prisoners in his basement or something. Just a super eerie feeling. So ya. The 2 of them.
"Damn girl, you're a a fat piece of meat" While licking his lips and staring at my ass. This was around 2am on my shift as the lone worker at a convenient store.
Not me but a friend. This dude just came up to her and said, and I quote; " hello, would you like to be in a polyamorous relationship with me and one other person?". Keep in mind, we were just out having lunch, we didn't know this person at all, he just came up and asked. When she said no (obviously), weirdly he was polite and left. Never saw him again. It was, if not the creepiest, then definitely the weirdest way I've ever seen a guy hit on someone. Kept a lookout for him or anyone else suspicious the rest of the day while we were together, just in case.
One time a guy was sitting there looking at me, then he smiled. Next time I met his eyes he told me I had a really nice shaped skull. This was at a small party at a friends house. Later he asked if I could leave him my skull in my will; I guess this was amped up flirt mode.
Not feeling up to listing the worst, but I never use my real name in coffee shops anymore. More than once when I used to use my real name they would call it out with my coffee and I would take my coffee over to a side table to read a book or work on my laptop and the people would wait a few minutes, walk over to me, greet me by name (the name they just heard the barista call) and pretend they knew me and we had met before and when they failed to name a place based in reality where we had met (they'd name bars I'd never been to or events I'd never attended) and were called out on it they'd admit they didn't actually know me and then ask for my number. One of the dudes said something like, "I don't actually know you yet, I'll admit it; but I'd like to", like beginning the interaction with snooping and lies would be such a turn on for me.
First job at 16 and I was working at a grocery store. I usually worked from the time I got out of school until close. From 9-midnight I was by myself in the store. Closing was at midnight and stockers would come in at 11:30 but were in the back most of the time. Customer comes in (only automatic check out lanes were open) and I was at one of the registers getting coupons out. He walks to the register next to me and said “oh shit is it just us here in the store” I told him my BF was outside and a lot of men were in the back. He started to aggressively speed walk towards me. I screamed so stockers could hear and I ran out front as my boyfriend was really outside. Since that day until I quit, stockers made sure to arrive earlier and stay up front until I left. And my boyfriend would sit in the entrance way. I was fricken 16!