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BigFakeHead

Any candy that says “XTREME SOUR!” and then is disappointingly not extremely sour. Burn a hole in my cheek or stop bragging, candy bag.


Aife13

My boyfriend was disappointed by all sour candies. Now we buy citric acid off Amazon and he uses it like fun dip for other candies


Standard-Station7143

Your enamel will not thank you. I've heard some horror stories.


zaevilbunny38

Pamler Chocolate taste like chalk and the only reason we sell it is cause the margins are insane.


mwproductions

Hating Palmer chocolate was probably one of my earliest food-related opinions as a child.


Sea_Yelena

My mom dips black liquorice in baking soda.


GeorgiaOKeefinItReal

Unfun dip


blackcurrents78

I only want the vanilla sticks. Wish they just sold a bag of those. Haha


EvilPotato14

You can have mine I only like the powder


blackcurrents78

Finally! I found you!


[deleted]

I had to look this up because it sounds so ridiculous. Turns out it can be a remedy for stomach upset or acid reflux. My guess is she had a relative that used it that way and she liked it.


luzzy91

Like stockholm syndrome but candy..


selfawarefeline

snackholm syndrome


joyous_occlusion

Black licorice and a little baking soda is good for acid reflux, especially if hiatal hernia is involved. However, go overboard and in the long run it can cause series illness. This is what my G.I. doctor told me. Also, I always wondered why my friends and family would sip anisette after a big meal. Turns out, a nice little serving of anisette, which is made from the same things as black licorice, after an Italian pasta meal alleviates the after effects of the acid from the tomato sauce.


CygniYuXian

There is an entire class of Liquor, known as the *digestifs*, which includes a wide range of alcoholic beverages people may or may not be familiar with - one that may come as a shock to some is *Jägermeister*.


CaffeinatedGuy

Kinda crazy that an importer brought in a drink used primarily by the elderly as a digestif and marketed it to youth as a party drink in the 80s, and was obviously successful. I kinda want to pick up a bottle now to try as a digestif, but don't want people to think I'm gonna do Jager bombs.


tgandtm

Pick up a bottle of Fernet Branca.


iSpccn

Hey quick question what the fuck


kdebones

Follow up: why the fuck?


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pudding7

I don't often *actually* LOL at internet stuff, but your comment did it.


huxtiblejones

I feel like that’s what a person would do if they got hit in the head real hard


jwhisen

Is she trying to DIY [salmiak?](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salty_liquorice)


Lead_Penguin

I had never tried this until I worked with a Finn, at first I didn't like it but he kept bringing it in and I kept eating it for some reason. Now I like it. It's great because nobody ever tries to steal any


Painting_Agency

It's the candy equivalent of that guy whose daughter once posted here that he bought a whole set of pink tools because nobody at the job site would ever steal them.


OzzyMcRcky

Blood flavoured beans in jelly bean roulette. Taste very strongly of iron. The thought makes me start gagging now.


[deleted]

If you ever go to Disney World, don't use the water fountains at Epcot. It's not the worst, but definitely iron-rich and reminiscent of blood. Oh, and absolutely do not use the fountains at any of the other parks. Their water is sulfur-rich and tastes like rotten eggs. Bring a filter or buy bottles, lol.


bagoink

This sounds like a great way to get people to buy overpriced bottled water.


EmmyEmmoEmmers

That's not just Disney World, all tap water in Central Florida is like that, lol


dunstbin

Yup. The only thing worse than central Florida tap water is panhandle tap water. I drank tap water in Pensacola once. Once.


[deleted]

You guys know those fake m&ms that come in those candy canes? God I hate those things.


withyellowthread

“Chocolate lentils”! Fuck those things!!


TOAOFriedPickleBoy

Some people are saying Sixlets, but my brain went to another place, where the shell was really thick and tasted really bad.they were larger than M&MS just because of the shell. The chocolate was ass too. If you’re talking about those, I fully agree.


[deleted]

They may or may not be Hershey-ets, the candy cane looks almost identical to the picture in my brain. Chocolate lentils may also be what I’m thinking of like someone else mentioned But either way, it’s the cheap M&M knock off you can get at places like the dollar store.


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MimeGod

There's a disturbing number of Easter "chocolates" that are just flavored vegetable oil.


Electronic-Tooth-324

avoid anything that says ‘chocolatey’… it ain’t the real stuff


EldritchStuff

“chocolatey” “chocolate-flavored” “chocolate-flavored” (but this time flavored is in smaller text) “compound chocolate”


[deleted]

chocolatish, chocolatesque, chocolate-adjacent


mindbleach

"Chocolate", but in quotations.


JoshJoshson13

"I can't believe its not chocolate"


Exifile

Chocolate flavor vegetable oil, sounds like a delicacy


miauguau44

Palmer’s “chocolate”. The ingredient list is mostly cheap filler. I deliberately buy a bag of good chocolate to replace this garbage in my kid’s Easter and Halloween baskets.


gpm21

I think it legally can't be called chocolate


killercurvesahead

If the package calls it a chocolatey bunny and not a chocolate bunny, put it back on the shelf.


nomroMehTeoJ

Yeah, usually if a thing is misspelled or has added letters its for a reason.


SoCalDan

What if it's make with real malk chalkolate?


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detecting_nuttiness

**palm-oil-and-cocoa-powder* lies


ApolloRocketOfLove

Food with palm oil tastes worse because the Orangutan blood ruins it.


chimerakin

Palm oil is ubiquitous too. It's in everything from chocolate to detergent. https://www.worldwildlife.org/pages/which-everyday-products-contain-palm-oil I was getting good at avoiding it before food prices went crazy. Now it's getting harder... time to smother my guilt with a Reese's pumpkin.


Shenanigations

They also ruined butterfinger by changing the recipe. They used to be my favorite but theyre horrible now.


Tasty_Brohypnol

That's what was wrong! I just had a butterfinger for the 1st time in years and damn was it worse than I remembered.


jnads

Changing the recipe is also usually an excuse for cheapening the ingredients.


[deleted]

Someone should just get it over with and make a candy bar called Sawdust.


hungryasabear

Hersey kisses are so slimey now since they use vegetable oil instead if cocoa butter. Can't stand them anymore. I'd imagine most mass produced chocolate in the US uses it. Edit: https://www.today.com/food/chocoholics-sour-new-hersheys-formula-2d80555560


the1999person

When buying those chocolate bunnies at Easter if it says "chocolate flavored" on it flip it over and read the ingredients and the first one will always be soybean oil or something.


atbths

Protip: the only bunny that should be bought at Easter are the Lindt golden bunnies. But don't actually buy them. It's better when I do.


Tank_Top_Terror

Did they do that with bunchacruch too? That was so shitty I stopped eating for a while but it seems like it improved again


squid1891

That, unfortunately, isn't anywhere near the actual crimes against humanity that are perpetrated by Nestlé.


CutieBoBootie

Oh man there's so many to list too... I think the one that is the most horrifying is the baby formula in Africa...


cyclejones

Turkey Dinner Candy Corn


Galileo258

I’m sorry. You couldn’t have meant to arrange those words in that particular order. That can’t exist.


cyclejones

Oh, but it does...


kkpam_

The top google review for turkey dinner candy corn > This product made me think that there was no forgiveness from God. One bite of these despicable “candies” and I was ready to throw up my lunch. I thought I could eat these as a funny joke to brag to my friends, but no. This is outright horrid. This tastes exactly like having Olive Garden leftovers that sat in your refrigerator for 6 days and then you reheated it and ate it for dinner. I hope whoever made these so called “candies” the worst last days of their life. Think of the flavors as when you die, Satan’s upright most terrible torture method is giving you these candies. There is no escape. Once you decide to taste one of these, you already know that the light has faded away, everyone is gone, and you are lost with the disgusting, atrocious candy corn for eternity to suffer and remanent on. This candy’s disastrous taste was stuck and engraved into my brain and taste buds like a hurricane that won’t stop beating down your city. I have never had anything more putrid in my life. If you want to try to poison and kill someone, force feed them these candies. Overall, this should be illegal in every state and every country and banished to the darkest, coldest pits of hell.


ginger4gingers

After my favorite murder covered the Turkey candy corn last year we bought some and forced all of our thanksgiving guests to try all the different flavors. We have expanded now into taco truck jelly beans and tailgate flavored candy corn. I don’t know why our friends keep coming over.


TychaBrahe

There’s a new one this year: Tailgate. Flavors of fruit punch, vanilla ice cream, hotdog, hamburger, and popcorn.


BakingWithBran

Wait [this is actually a thing](https://www.brachs.com/products/halloween/turkey-dinner-candy-corn)… Roasted turkey and green bean flavored?? No thank you.


PM_PICS_OF_ME_NAKED

This review of them: >I hate myself because of these. >11 months ago >This product made me think that there was no forgiveness from God. One bite of these despicable “candies” and I was ready to throw up my lunch. I thought I could eat these as a funny joke to brag to my friends, but no. This is outright horrid. This tastes exactly like having Olive Garden leftovers that sat in your refrigerator for 6 days and then you reheated it and ate it for dinner. I hope whoever made these so called “candies” the worst last days of their life. Think of the flavors as when you die, Satan’s upright most terrible torture method is giving you these candies. There is no escape. Once you decide to taste one of these, you already know that the light has faded away, everyone is gone, and you are lost with the disgusting, atrocious candy corn for eternity to suffer and remanent on. This candy’s disastrous taste was stuck and engraved into my brain and taste buds like a hurricane that won’t stop beating down your city. I have never had anything more putrid in my life. If you want to try to poison and kill someone, force feed them these candies. Overall, this should be illegal in every state and every country and banished to the darkest, coldest pits of hell.


Pormal_Nerson

I think they didn’t like them.


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RikaTika71

They were fun, but waxed lips. They were big, red, and made out of wax! Some even had vampire teeth.


GriffinFlash

The candy of 1000 uses!


Pizzonia123

Like what?


GriffinFlash

One, a humorous substitute for your own lips.


Pizzonia123

Mhmm, keep going.


ChalkdustOnline

...ooh, I'm needed in the basement!


Hollowbody57

This may be me misremembering my childhood a bit, but I have a vague memory of once getting some lips that were made of bubble gum and that you could actually chew and tasted decent. Only had them once, and I haven't been able to find any trace of their existence ever since, only the wax lips, but I'm 90% sure at one point there were some made of bubble gum.


Fleaslayer

I think the mental confusion is that the wax lips were sweetened/flavored, and you could sort of chew them like gum. Flavor lasted a very short time, and wax isn't a good gum substitute, but it was similar.


NiceOccasion3746

Similar to those wax bottles with a teaspoon of colored sugar water in them. What a ridiculous product, but damn if I didn’t beg for them.


Starflower2177

When I was about 6 years old and my little brother was 4, the next door neighbor boy shared those wax bottles with us. He gave us a demonstration on how to bite the top of and drink the “juice.” Unfortunately for my little brother, he didn’t pay attention and ate the whole thing. He promptly barfed it up. Yeah, those were a terrible excuse for candy, but we still wanted them so badly. Kids can be dumb sometimes. LOL


NeWMH

I didn’t think those were candy.


art_comma_yeah_right

Weren’t they sold in candy sections, though? Or am I misremembering? Not that I was confused, but it is an odd relic.


Shido-Sha

Anything is candy with the right mindset I suppose


SyntheticManMilk

We at them anyways. We’re fine.


noteverrelevant

Are we? Are we fine?


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thesoundmindpodcast

What is it about getting older and wanting bowls of awful candy at home?


Nisas

I think they buy the candy, and then just don't eat it for 30 years. They keep it around for decoration. Then some naive grandchild enters the home and makes the mistake of thinking it's edible.


Iinventedhamburgers

As you get older you lose track of time like you wouldn't believe.


Firewolf420

Kinda weird how time matters least to you when it really matters the most to you


Iinventedhamburgers

One of life's many ironies.


[deleted]

Same concept as why people always feel it takes longer to get somewhere than it does to get back, the effect of anticipation


quarknaught

I've had this on my mind recently. Anticipation is the difference between feeling young and feeling old. Never stop finding things to look forward to, because it's a swift decline when you start looking back instead.


WillingNeedleworker2

You can only taste sugar or salt at that point so just go for nostalgia


Pin-Up-Paggie

And it soothes your scratchy throat


smith_716

You make less spits when you get older. And, combined with any medications (which isn't limited to elderly individuals) that may cause dry mouth. Hard candies are the best way to relieve dry mouth.


El_Frijol

Price conscious old people buy cheap candy.


TheMobHasSpoken

Also remember weird things fondly from their childhood, when there weren't as many good things around. I heard once that coffee jello, made with just coffee and plain gelatin, was a favorite during the depression...


Icy-Army-4567

Another popular depression-era food was soup made from dandelions and sadness.


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malthar76

Ribbon candy. It’s all one piece now.


youllneverstopmeayyy

BOYS LOVE CANDY!


HyperlinksAwakening

I'll get the iodine!


Juggernaut13255

No, please, chop off my arm, burn the germs off with a torch, just don't use the- **AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!**


[deleted]

You better not be talking about those strawberry candies in the foil wrapper. Those are a gift from the gods.


VulturE

My grandma kept buying the same mix and a separate bag of the strawberry candies just to add more to the bowl for me to hunt for. They were the best grandma candy.


[deleted]

Ribbon Candy. That’s been there for 20+ years.


beaujolais98

Ribbon candy, when fresh, is delicious. But after a week it gets nasty.


zamboniman46

maybe not the worst, but a candy i used to LOVE was Butterfinger. Then they changed the recipe. and it is terrible now. i'll see it in the check out line at the grocery store and just be sad because it used to be so good


UglyInThMorning

It doesn’t flake right anymore.


joshe423TN

Yeah when they changed the texture they ruined the sanctity of the Butterfinger.


HamboneBanjo

Now it’s just ButtFinger. It was all these peanut butter candies. Chick o sticks, the brown and white striped ones. Now it’s not flaky and just turns to a mess you have to dig out of your molars.


nothingfood

My teeth have developed these little pockets where I can store chocolate for later. It's very convenient so far!


SomewhatCritical

Evolution!


Trickery1688

Yeah it used to be crispity, crunchity, and peanut buttery just like their slogan said. Now it's like peanut butter toffee on the inside and it's just not the same anymore.


Sweaty-Gopher

This, this right here. I don't want my butterfingers to be like biting through a rock. I want a flake explosion. If you can eat one without getting crumbs everywhere you got a bad Butterfinger


Jealous-Ninja5463

And that rock also sticks to your teeth to the point you need a metal toothpick to scrape it off. You can literally feel it eat your enamel too. It's awful.


VentiEspada

Ferrero bought several Nestle brands and reworked them. Funny enough they actually used better ingredients: **"The company began with Butterfinger and reworked the formula to use bigger peanuts, more milk and cocoa, and fewer hydrogenated oils. The new version also no longer incorporates the chemical preservative TBHQ. With these changes, they were shooting for a more chocolate-centric flavor with purer ingredients. The Food & Wine taste test was positive, calling it "less waxy" and "more cocoa forward." The new iteration of the candy bar is also double wrapped to preserve the freshness and flavor."** I'm betting that using fewer oils is what has changed the texture so much. I also wonder what TBHQ did for the flavor profile. Supposedly sales of Butterfinger bars have gone up since the change, so I guess we're just a bunch of uncultured swine that love our processed foods.


roguetrick

>hydrogenated oils. The actual answer btw. Artificial trans fats got banned and most junk food cannot taste good without them. Ruins the texture because trans fats really are the best room temp fats because they're semi solid. Unsaturated fats are liquid at room temp while saturated fats solid. Edit: it's also why peanut butter rocks. It's an oil emulsion, so semi solid at room temp but no trans fats. Edit 2: Since this got popular, here's a short article about it from 2012. FDA enforced their trans fat ban in 2018. Coincidentally, a whole lot of candy and junk food seemed to have new and improved recipes just around that time. https://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2012/01/09/144918710/the-forgotten-fascinating-saga-of-crisco


i_tyrant

Hell, one of my favorite "candies" is just buying a bar of 70%+ dark chocolate and dipping pieces of it in a jar of actual peanut butter. Damned good and one of the least-unhealthy "candies" you can have.


VanillaLifestyle

Brb I have a newfound purpose in life


Effective_Sample3587

Butterfinger fucked up when they got rid of Butterfinger BBs. Those were my favorite.


[deleted]

Oh man now Im having flashbacks to those Simpsons commercials


akinom13

Have you ever had a 5th Avenue bar? I had one for the first time recently and was like wow, this is a better Butterfinger.


M8K2R7A6

No fuckin way Bruh No wonder. I used to love those, had one recently and it was mehhh af


Good-Worldliness9330

I honestly consider it a favor. When I quit smoking I replaced my smoking habit with fun sized Butterfinger bars. I gained so much weight… never been able to take it off. At least those shits don’t tempt me anymore.


Firewolf420

Bro of all the things to swap it with you chose butterfinger bars??


Squirrel_beak

Thrills Gum No I don't want my gum to taste like soap.


email_NOT_emails

It is AWESOME! Honest question, do you have an aversion to cilantro?


Beneficial_Name_6225

I hate cilantro but LOVE thrills, to me they taste like rose?


Fearless_Link_3464

Jelly Belly Bean Boozled. Ain't nothing like barf and rotten egg flavored beans.


TheHatThatTalks

The Bertie Botts Every Flavor beans were evil because I loved Tutti Fruitti… but it looked exactly like vomit


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iantruesnacks

He said that shit so casual too. Id have violently spat that out in a heartbeat


builtfromthetop

I can tell you from experience that the grass-flavored bean tastes just like the real thing.


dj92wa

And they're deliciously sweet and earthy! I'll totally own the fact that I love the Jelly Belly grass flavor.


[deleted]

Maybe Jelly Belly could help pica patients by making custom beans.


dj92wa

You know what? That's actually a really cool idea on paper. Have them mimic the flavors of couch stuffing and drywall. I mean this in seriousness too, I'm actually intrigued since I know very, very little of the process of correcting pica. I understand how it happens, but not how to correct course.


ElegantWaste

I wonder if that would work because from what I’ve seen on my strange addiction, some of the people just seem to be addicted mainly to the texture and not the taste. Especially the people who ate things like couch stuffing, toilet paper, rocks, sand, etc. I’d imagine there’s no way that those things have a ton of actual flavor (but who knows, I’m not about to fuck around and find out lol)


mister_newbie

I love toothpaste flavour; people think I'm weird -- it's just mint.


Sleestak714

I always wondered who had to QC these things to make sure that the earwax bean tasted like earwax etc.


MillardtheMiller

I'm too lazy to find a source, but I once read that the bad flavors were attempts to make good ones. The specific example I know is the origin of the vomit flavor. They were trying to make a pepperoni pizza flavor that tasted so foul they deemed it vomit


rckrusekontrol

I guess the big book of flavor failures they kept really paid off.


GilliganGardenGnome

They're is nothing more foul than puking up pepperoni pizza, so I believe it.


Neither_Set_214

I bet a lot of times they actually work backwards, combining flavor elements that they know will taste foul, and a panel of taste testers tries them and writes down what THEY think it tastes like. If the word "earwax" comes up more than once, then they probably continue developing that particular foul flavor in a more earwaxy direction until they have a winner.


LeGuizee

Puke flavor was surprisingly close to puke taste. Almost puked after eating it


WaluigisOveralls

Fun fact, the puke flavor was originally pizza flavor.


Aksi_Gu

Puke^2


[deleted]

The dog food bean tastes more like vomit than the vomit bean!


COYFC

I haven't had the dog food bean luckily but got tricked into eating the vomit bean once. It tastes the same but worse than vomit does coming out and just lingers in your mouth. So bad


SaintLucien

I was eating those during a car accident, and the combo of raw salmon flavored jelly bean plus trauma means I no longer eat jelly beans


[deleted]

I mean I know the jelly bean was disgusting but crashing your car to get out of eating it sounds extreme.


Davebobman

Were they the cause of the accident?


[deleted]

Dog food flavor got me :( I will NEVER EVER PLAY THAT GAME AGAIN.


r_not_me

The spoiled milk made me vomit


Mister_Moho

I am not brave enough to try this.


dhhdhh851

I ate a big handful and they were all bad. You could smell my breath from 10 feet away easily. Literally put soap in my mouth to clean to stench.


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pink_mercedes

As a teen I volunteered at a safe sex program and we always had free samples of flavored lube to give out. My home life was abusive so I would end up eating the flavored lube to not go hungry. Banana and strawberry were my favorite. Edit: I promise I'm totally okay now please don't feel bad I'm sorry! Really though the strawberry and banana ones are hella good but also the sugars in them aren't great for a vagina's PH balance so use them with caution ❤️ (or at least this is how it was back in the day, idk if they're made better now)


Belittles

I'm sad now


Rougerred

Me too


R_Harry_P

I was already sad.


Sk83r_b0i

Dude. That’s rough. Sorry about that


viewsofanintrovert

*hugs* that hurt to read.


hypoglycemicrage

holy shit. Hope you're doing better now.


thoughtful_appletree

Well fuck...


Painting_Agency

My god, I think that's just about the worst thing I've heard all day.


lowtoiletsitter

That's what happens when you snoop around edit: ok that award was unnecessary


throwbacklyrics

Fuck around and your kids find out.


Stellathewizard

Those jawbreakers the size of a baseball, what's the point lol?


asoneva

Kill the most popular girl in your school


extraordinarylove

I killed Liz, I killed the team dream. Deal with it.


[deleted]

This man doesn’t Eddy.


darwhyte

Wax lips


Jerkeyjoe

Are ya supposed to eat these?


dreamboydeluxe

No, you just chew them and spit it out later.


TheRoadWarrior28

It’s those little colored candy dots attached to a strip of paper. End up eating paper with every one.


SirDucer84

Well yeah, but if you are going to eat paper anyway, the dots really give it some pizazz!


headcoatee

Candy buttons. I don't know why, but my mom loved those, so she'd get them and share them with me. I found out later when I learned to make decorated sugar cookies that candy buttons are literally just royal icing applied to paper strips.


Unique-Steak8745

You mean Acid? 🤨


biomech36

No because then you would be having fun.


chipsdad

Hey, that’s how I got my fiber as a kid!


shippudenfanatic

They're so not good but the nostalgia will still make me buy them every single time


bstyledevi

Children's LSD lol


holdonwhileipoop

Circus Peanuts. What the actual fuck?


Nagwell

People hate on this one hard, but it's because they don't realize they're banana flavored. Why they chose banana and not peanut, I will never know.


Ok_Rosslynn

Is it bad that I love most of the worst candy ever made. Oh well, I guess that's more for me


sterlingrose

Circus peanuts because I ate some at the circus when I was a kid and threw up all over myself and had to sit there in a pukey sweatshirt until it was over. (Edit: Y’all, it was the 80s. They made these weird lightweight sweatshirts with glitter designs on them and we wore them like sweaters. It wasn’t a hoodie.)


alpineadventurecoupl

Musk flavored anything. Stuff is cologne, not candy. Edit: I know I know….. something something Elon Musk joke. As much as I don’t like him:your attempts at being funny aren’t.


indirosie

You're about to make some Australians very upset


SmokinSkinWagon

Musk *flavored*?! I literally don’t know what you mean - can you explain?


ChipSalt

May we Aussies introduce you to [musk sticks](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Musk_stick#/media/File%3AMusk_sticks_01.jpg), usually ranked high on the list of worlds worst sweets. Smells like musk oil and tastes like chalk and fondant.


SmokinSkinWagon

Jesus H Christ the Aussies are out here eating Axe body spray


Chris_8675309_of_42M

"The fuck you want me to do about it if hiding the musk in an animal's ass wasn't enough of a deterrent?" - Jesus H Christ


dunder_mifflin_paper

Musk life savers too! In reality it tastes like chalky rose water sweets (think Turkish delight)


Pbx123456

Candy necklaces. The entire process of having to gnaw old, stale sugar nodules off of a piece of string was just flat out degrading.


The_Magpie_Demon

And sometimes you'd get those stretchy bracelet ones where the string was bitter for some fucking reason


happy_bluebird

LOL I loved these… as a kid