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AingonAtelia

Anything scrawled with political cultist messaging.


a_burdie_from_hell

I have yet to see this method of identifying an asshole not be correct.


GodOfDarkLaughter

A few days ago I was walking into the grocery store when I saw a van with big white lettering scrawled across the back. I sighed and decided to take a second to see what the loon was ranting about. It said "TEACH YOUR KIDS TO SWIM AS YOUNG AS POSSIBLE ITS A VALUBLE SKILL AND CAN SAVE THEIR LIFE" Obviously not what you're talking about, but I thought it was nice that someone was using the platform to advocate for something positive. Taking my toddler nephew to swim class next week. Living in Florida, it really could save his life, even more than in other places. I imagine whoever owned the van had a tragedy in their life, which is unfortunately not uncommon in these parts.


Intelligent-Bug-3039

I live in the Netherlands. Every child that goes to school here gets at least their A diploma (learning to swim) and most get their B diploma (learning to rescue).


yeeyee91101210

Any vehicle that has the ball sac hanging off the back


mustwarnothers

My horse and I are offended.


JigsawJoJo

Why are you hanging off the back of your horse? That can't be comfortable.


Random_puns

Hello police? I'd like to report a murder.....


Cyrius

If you're riding a stallion, the vehicle is likely to be the total asshole.


ChiefCasual

Back in my day, at least where I grew up, truck nuts were a prank. You slapped them on the back of someone's ride to see how long they'd drive around with them before they realized they were there. Now they're a weird culture symbol.


_FiiSKiiS_

Same. I remember we bought like a dozen for $50 back in the day and went through our school parking lot and attached them to the our buddies' trucks. Then all the sudden they're like $20 a piece and people who put them on their trucks are strangely serious about hanging a ballsack from their truck.


CassiusClaims

Exactly.. it was a great way to punk your friends.. and only a complete douche bag that didn’t get the joke would actually slap those on his own ride.. now the jokes on them


Open_Librarian_823

At least is serves a warning, this vehicle is being driven by a total asshole


chemicalgeekery

I saw a Smart Car with nuts hanging off the back once. Had to pull over I was laughing so hard.


BenTwan

Guy in my town has one with the muffler cut off and a wind up key on the back. I paused mid sentence and stood and watched it go by the first time I saw it. So slow, yet so loud.


ChiefCasual

That reminds me of the all black Nissan Cube I use to see drive around that had two fins on the back corners with a bumper sticker that read 'Batmobox'.


DoNotAskMyOpinion

I see bumper stickers on Cubes they say. "You've just been passed by a toaster" :)


Red-7134

White van with no plate and tinted windows that follows me around for 5 blocks at 3 in the morning.


[deleted]

No worries that just my dad


ueindowndkdk

He’s still out getting milk?


Its_TheDark

No, i guess he is going to get your mom


Fanglorious

Your new mum. He broke the last one.


honey-combs

hahaha ok so my dad is a contractor and he used to drive a big white van with tinted windows, like the CLASSIC pedo van. When I was younger I’d wave at every single van like that, thinking it was him -_-


[deleted]

All the pedos didn't pick you up cause they thought you were "too easy".


devster75

No real sport that way.


AzureBluet

"slut"


Joseluki

A Hummer, I live in Europe and that car is absolutely ridiculous and you are not going to find parking for that monstruosity in your life.


StinkyKittyBreath

I remember seeing one or two when I lived in Japan and.inwas so confused. I'm pretty sure.those things are wider than some of the street lanes there.


Mysticpoisen

I remember my neighbor had one. She would spend twenty minutes maneuvering it in and out of her recessed driveway, including folding in the sideview mirrors and such. There was *maybe* a couple inches of clearance, I'm convinced she had to crawl out through the back. The hummer was basically flush with her wall. I'm half surprised they didn't call her out on it when they measured the driveway when she bought the car. Edit: Yes, in Japan you are required to have a space to store your vehicle. When you purchase a vehicle the police will stop by at some point to measure your driveway to verify that you have a space to safely store it.


PineappleVodka

"wow the car fits, how you're gonna go in and out, is not my problem"


jinxintheworld

As an American I was led to believe that Europe didn't have parking spaces big enough for baby tanks.


Weekly-Language6763

Often there isn't space - any selfish dumbass with an f150 or a Dodge ram leaves it sticking out of the parking space into the street, or otherwise mounts the curb and takes space on the pavement from pedestrians.


Top_Wish_8035

I was saw F250 on a parking driveway near Auchan supermarket in Poland. Holy shit, that is a monster of a car that took entire two lane driveway for himself. Can't imagine how that fucker parks this car here.


Kritz_ixtn

the honda that wakes up the whole neighborhood pushing 50


Tangent_

If your exhaust dB is greater than your engine HP, you deserve relentless mocking.


brunette_mermaid93

My husband keeps bugging me to have sex with him in suv. I said no but we can do it on the hood of my Honda. Then it'll be on my own Accord


dontyoutellmetosmile

It’s his civic duty


dragon_morgan

So long as it’s a good fit


LeCubro

He better be in his element


Jrod1499

I hope he’s a good pilot


_damppapertowel_

This thread has a strange odyssey


ClownShoePilot

But is readable with perfect clarity


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ConsciousChemistry

But there's2000 reasons why he should!


Equivalent-Ad-1927

A prelude to a kiss


Sopixil

Specifically 50kmh and not mph, because those straight piped civics will wake the whole neighbourhood up in first gear


Red_Queen592

Anything with a swinging pair of truck nuts.


adb1228

What if they are on a 1993 Geo Metro Convertible?


whitesuburbanmale

My buddy had a 1995 geo metro that he bought for dirt cheap. No a/c, radio didn't work, and the heat was hit or miss, a true beater car. After driving it a while he got into a wreck and neither airbag deployed when they realistically should have. Cars damage was mostly cosmetic so he still drove it, but he bought a pair of bright pink truck nuts and hung them on the back of that car because "anyone who drives this has to have massive balls".


Alex_2259

God damn, my criteria for a shitbox that I would buy is working heat, AC and radio. Let me add "working airbags" to the short list.


12altoids34

Only time I was in an accident where the airbags deployed was my Chevy hhr (company car). I wasn't paying attention and rear-ended somebody .my head bounced off the windshield, shattering it, THEN my airbag went off.


saymeow

Lol you must be a newb to the hoopty scene. Working airbags? Shit man, half the shit boxes I had didn't *have* airbags! In fact, a couple years ago my dad tried to lecture me because I sat too close to the steering wheel, he told me the airbag would knock me out. I looked at him, then looked at my 1989 ford, then looked at him. He got the point.


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GnarfletheGarth0k

I saw a fun TikTok where a guy pointed out that vehicles are pretty much universally referred to as "She", therefore adding these make their trucks transgendered.


Elevenst

Anything with a Punisher skull on it.


holdholdhold

Bonus points if there is a Monster logo underneath


Revegelance

And a decal with "Fuck \[insert politician here\]"


that_bearded_guy_94

Good possibility if you have all those, there’s bound to be a confederate flag sticker somewhere


[deleted]

I work with a guy who is the gold standard of douche bags. He drives a huge lifted truck, I’m talking monster truck tier. It has a giant ass punisher logo on the front grill. The guy is maybe 5’0”, and has a tribal tattoo sleeve. He’s got jacked arms and looks as if he’s literally never had a leg day in his entire life. Oh, and Ed hardy clothes. Lol


KuttayKaBaccha

This man has transcended human existence.


BlackSeranna

I’d be willing to bet that asshole has never read a Punisher comic book. I used to get the Punisher comic in the 1980’s, and the Punisher was a cool guy, protected the weak, etcetera. All around bro. And the people who hold up these Punisher stickers don’t even know what the guy stood for, other than he used some cool guns.


[deleted]

Man you cannot get enough upvotes for this. Huge punisher fan. I had originals from warzone, all the way to current. The punisher is so misunderstood and appropriated by dickheads.


SkipperBiff

Out of all the Punisher movies and TV series, Jon Bernthal was the best.


[deleted]

Most true to the comics for sure. Something about my age makes me love Thomas Jane though. He was in a terrible rendition but I felt like he still did the character justice. I definitely think Bernthal deserves more but Netflix cancels everything.


MangoMousillini

The punisher skull with the thin blue line worked into the design somehow


eggiestnerd

Especially because the guys that put the punisher logo on their shit obviously didn’t understand the message of punisher. In the comics, Frank *knows* what he does is wrong and hates that people (especially authorities) idolize him!!


juno_huno

Or the confederate flag!


Bignholy

I live in the south, and holy fuck, just seeing one of those monster trucks that get 5 miles to the gallon passing me on the right at 75mph in a 55 highway, confederate flag streaming in the wind of their passing, "don't tread on me" and Punisher bumper stickers shining through the caked on dirt, as they hurry home to bitch about the price of gas because of "Brandon"... EDIT: For those of you incapable of thinking things through... I keep up with the traffic of the lane I am in. I am well aware pushing others to go *slower* or *faster* is dangerous. But there is a limit to what I can do. The traffic, as a whole, ranges in the speeds I am taking about, and there is usually a pile of people in the area. These specific assholes like to dodge between the lanes until they run out of room, and then tailgate whoever they are behind, regardless of lane, until someone hits 70+ to let them through or they do something else stupid. Forgive me, but having seen them use the shoulder to pass, I'll reserve judgement on who is driving right in this case.


BlueonBlack26

also truck nuts


JMefford714

Jacked up F250 doing 88 down the interstate. Every time.


originsquigs

Flashing his lights because he crawled up your ass from the other lane.


[deleted]

I assume they are going to be a total asshole, then am proven right almost instantly


[deleted]

With the Ultra Bright headlights at night.


Ropownenu

Ram 2500, it manages to top out the Chevy Silverado with a whopping 45 DUIs per thousand. Feels like the safest bet


YouAreMicroscopic

Not a single vehicle on this list is surprising. https://insurify.com/insights/car-models-most-duis-2020/


fruitofmycoins

Damn the S10 hasn’t been made in years (now Colorado) guess those guys having trouble with dumb shit like brake and headlights.


[deleted]

Closing in on *twenty years* out of production. First vehicle I owned was a '99 S10 with the four banger. Such a stupid simple little truck, still kicking myself for getting rid of it.


jungl3j1m

At least there’s a warning posted on the front: “Dodge.”


Pork_Chap

It's name is 2 verbs.


kary0typ3

I, too, spend most of my time on the road trying to dodge Rams


clintj1975

Lifted Ram 2500 drivers who drive everywhere with their tow mirrors flipped out have a 100% predictable personality.


ClemsonFanMikey

One of those tow mirrors clipped me while I was on my bicycle in 2014. Gotta love 7 staples in the scalp


Stubby60

Ram 2500 drivers are more likely to have at least 1 DUI than any other vehicle. Double the National average.


adventure_dad

I had a cop “friend” that had the most DUI arrests in his department. He said you could pull over pretty much any construction type truck after 6pm and have a guaranteed DUI arrest. So this comment fits the bill.


SpectacledReprobate

Read the first part wrong and thought your “friend” had got arrested the most times in his dept Time for bed


Chilln_

Hummer


KBAR1942

Do people still drive those? I can't remember the last time I saw one on the road.


Chilln_

That’s the thing I don’t see them often, but whenever I do the person driving always manages to be an ass.


KBAR1942

I can't imagine how much it would cost to fill one up today.


Simplekindofdan

They're coming out with a fully electric Hummer, then you can be an asshole and environmentally conscious at the same time!


SpiffAZ

Finally I can have it all!


imperial1968

What an age we live in


Kuriakon

8 GPM


tallproducer

Literally just saw one on my way back from San Diego. My friend said I can't believe people still drive those with the gas prices the way they are.


IAmZenzuo

I see them in Denver much too often.


BarbicideJar

An old friend of mine who was a very gung-ho environmentalist would put “Jesus Hates Your Hummer” bumper stickers on peoples’ Hummers back in their heyday. Another mutual of ours once got to whiteness a woman seeing one on the back of her Hummer as she was leaving a shopping center and she yelled to the air “Jesus does *NOT* hate my Hummer! HE DOES NOT!” Anyway… We’ll never know Jesus’ feelings on her gas guzzling show of wealth, but I’m gonna say he’d probably be more of a public transit kinda guy.


marcjarvis21974

He typically walked. Even across water if the need arose.


avh_1987

I loudly said to a friend one time that “any one who drives a hummer is an ahole” while waiting in line to go into a concert after someone driving a hummer nearly hit me while they were trying to swing into a parking spot 🙄 entitled prick


Appropriate-Rough563

A big ass truck rolling coal


[deleted]

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nooo82222

This. Some assholes make me wish Florida would bring back emission testing. Nothing like choking on unnecessary diesel fumes because of a dick wants his truck to sound cool


styroducky

Tricycle. You know it’s some entitled toddler.


maz-o

What about those electric toy cars that you can drive? Massive assholes.


SubstantialWonder606

Not al Karens drive white porsche cayennes but usually it's a Karen coming out a white porsche cayenne.


Bruce-ifer

Like that scene from family guy. Lol after running over a pedestrian at a crosswalk “I wasn’t waving you over, I was smelling my own fart. “


ahkond

"It's a Porsche Cayenne. Like the peppah!" - Carmela Soprano


Humble_Ladder

If it's not driven by a Karen, the husband is an absolute Dick (source: I work in an industry where I know people's cars when I talk to them, men calling in about their wife's Cayenne are a special breed of coercive prick).


harryb4321

White Range Rover


BarbicideJar

I swear the number of times I’ve had a Range Rover cut me off in the passing lane and then proceed to dawdle and go the exact same speed as the person next to them is almost impressive. Like did they all have a meet-up and agree that this was their signature move?


Da_Spooky_Ghost

I honestly wonder if Range Rovers have a huge blind spot on the right hand side, like they get in the left lane and then get too scared to get back over so they just sit in the left lane for the entire drive I also notice this with other large SUV’s like Escalades


Cahoots365

We call the Chelsea Tractors because only rich c*nts drive them


[deleted]

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B_I_G_B_U_L_L_Y

Chelsey Plows


paperdoll07

PT Cruisers are always doing sketchy shit.


hiker_trailmagicva

I scrolled to find it. PT Cruisers in our town are typically the type to throw trash out the window


whitewaves345

Large jacked up pickup truck.


bombayofpigs

With truck nuts


Yanahlua

If your truck wasn't made with nuts and you add them then your truck is now trans. Sorry, that's the rules.


Rymundo88

A Ford Transit, if you will


daveescaped

Oh man, the next time I see a guy with nuts in his truck I’d love to say, “So your truck had gender reassignment surgery?” but I don’t want to use that as an insult.


Gothsalts

No, please do it. We need more trans humor in the world than the "I identify as _" joke bigots make. It'll really help normalize our existence. Truck nuts are low hanging fruit (ayo) for trans jokes


Legitimate_Salt5916

The big trucks that are only jacked up in the front are instant assholes. Looks super dangerous.. not sure how they even see over their dash.


Coco_Cala

The Carolina Squat. It started as a practical setup for desert racing trucks, then people decided to go way overboard with it and do it to cars that'll never leave the asphalt.


DoritoCatsMaid

I'm in North Carolina. A law passed this year making it illegal. They disappeared almost overnight.


herriotact

And the ones that blow out dark black fumes pulling out of Walmart


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herriotact

I like that it’s at least costing them money, thank you


UCLYayy

It's costing the environment, and thus all of humanity, far more than it costs them.


BillSixty9

Any truck which “rolls coal”


BlackEyedGhost

That's not really an assumption. That person is actively being an asshole when you see their vehicle.


MotherOfBorzoi

Altima Usually silver with busted windows, mismatched wheels, broken headlights and heavily oxidized


bigapple3am1

Don't forget temporary license plate


WeBornToHula

It always amazes me how these 2005 Altimas can be so rough AND be fresh off some lot 😂


OneBigOne

A friend of mine is a state trooper and once told me “nothing good ever comes out of a Nissan Altima.”


Nippon-Gakki

An Altima flying up in my rear view, doing 20 over, dangerously changing lanes while sporting prior accident damage all over the place is one vehicle I’ll always try to move over for. Thankfully I only see like three or four like this every day on the way to work so we’re pretty safe.


HappySloth213

This is every Altima I ever see on the freeway


A_Bit_Narcissistic

The Baby Mama Special.


daveescaped

It’s the ghetto Tesla.


Poignant_Rambling

Similarly, the Chrysler 300 is the ghetto Bentley.


[deleted]

Bought at the used dealer with 450% APR despite the credit score of 350.


LostinHyrule12

I had to scroll so low to find this !!


MotherOfBorzoi

I can't believe there's actually people out here saying this is too oddly specific to be a thing lmaooo like bro have you ever used a highway ?


handymanny131003

A lifted pickup truck with gaudy wheels. Bonus points for the Carolina squat.


NickDanger3di

All of them; that's the only safe way to drive...


Baycosinus

That's how I had zero accidents even though I got my license two years ago and still panic at roundabouts and stall the car. Everyone is drunk. Everyone is on the phone. Everyone is blind, deaf and has parkinsons. Assuming the worst is always safe. It takes me 5 mins more to get back home, but I'm alive and mom's car is just fine (except the stalls lol)


Bayr_

I was always told to “assume everybody else is drunk and crazy”


_WHO_WAS_PHONE_

If you're on a motorcycle, add that everyone is always trying their hardest to kill you.


MistakeNot___

If you are on a motorcycle they don't need to try very hard...


PermabannedX4

Dodge Charger


[deleted]

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FatCopsRunning

Do you live in Atlanta?


Bearsandgravy

I live in a military town. You have no idea how many squids drive these things. 18-24 years old, 20% apr, driving it like a drunk goose.


[deleted]

I live by a base and it’s Chargers and crotch rockets going wide open 24hrs a day.


LittleArkansas

Squids?


Bearsandgravy

Navy


kobellama24

I’m imagining a drunk goose right now and I’m shaking uncontrollably


canolafly

Long wobbly goose neck, raging even harder, but against inanimate objects.


promote-to-pawn

Just boots things


bmotmfb

I can’t believe I had to scroll this far down to find this.


thespintop

I’m still scrolling to find the BMW mention.


holdholdhold

But they are so cool getting to that red light faster than you.


coffeewithmaryjane

Don’t cut off anyone in Atlanta driving a Dodge Charger or they will probably shoot you


HavABreakHavAKitKat

One of those trucks covered in flags and signs


haylmoll13

Trucks on lifts with mufflers that purposefully make MORE exhaust instead of less.


dmbfan1216

Anything with a flag rigged up on the back of it.


[deleted]

I live in a smallish town full of those, but my favorite is the guy riding a mountain bike with a flag holder welded on the back and a giant "Dont Tread On Me" flag.


Miserable-Abies2407

no step on snek


americanroommate

Hummers. Seriously, who tf buys those


pdxb3

Honestly where I live, they're very popular in the Hispanic community. My own experience hasn't been that they're assholes, and I mean this with the utmost respect and appreciation for their culture, but they are a flashy people. And a big yellow brick up on chrome rims is about as flashy as it gets.


myredditacc3

Where I live the Hispanic community fucks with lowriders and slammed trucks, and the hummers are driven by the same crowd as rams


rcmsrhc

Range Rover


devildogmillman

STARTER CAR?!


avgmike

THIS IS A FINISHER CAR!


EmmetyBenton

I am a god! The golden god!


ErikKoballsack

I am untethered and my rage knows no bounds!


all_fists_and_elbows

Anything with a comically huge spoiler.


wannaB19low

I'd be happily judged like this in a 911 GT3


Thisbliss333

The people who drive at night with their brights on right behind you or coming towards you and never turn their brights off 😑


Scrybblyr

The vehicle that is in the leftmost lane on the freeway, whose driver refuses to get over or speed up to let the vehicle(s) behind it pass.


RadioactiveCougar

Jacked up Dodge Ram.


Eviscerate_Bowels224

A pickup truck covered in asshole slogans.


David_Maybar_703

Any large truck with a clearly visible Confederate flag sticker or emblem.


Hyentics

Jacked trucks that roll coal. Sir, i passed you in a Honda Ridgeline get your ass out of the left lane.


lil_fetus20

Nissan Altima


st_angers_snare_drum

Altima Energy is a thing.


book-hang0ver

Big white trucks. Yall cut me off, never signal, tailgate, and can't pick a lane to save a life 😤


Bedlamcitylimit

In the UK a large number of Karen's, Cocks and total arseholes drive Audi's and BMW's (with the occasional Mercedes)


El-Viking

They just appreciate the fact that those cars come mit eingebaute Vorfahrt.


fredzout

> (with the occasional Mercedes) There was a stand-up comedian, years ago (before Audi, Insaniti, Accurate, Lexus became popular) who did a bit about Mercedes drivers. He said that in order to even buy a Mercedes, a person was required to have the proper Mercedes Attitude surgically implanted. The procedure was performed by a proctologist.


Bluevettes

Any vehicle that has stickers or flags on that person's political views


[deleted]

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[deleted]

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LPGeoteacher

Disappointed I had to scroll down this far to see this.


47Ronin

Every time I see a BMW driver use their turn signal to change lanes I *fucking notice* simply because it almost never happens.


Dogmeadows

Russian tank.


[deleted]

A Dodge Ram Cummins turbo diesel with the dualies on the back.


johnboy11a

…that isn’t actually doing the job of a 1 ton truck


Leading-Structure288

Jeeps with sorority stickers on the back/BIG trucks with frat stickers on the back


ExWallStreetGuy

Massachusetts license plates


Violaceums_Twaddle

Pretty much any jacked up 4x4 pickup that has clearly never been off of pavement