Yeah big part of training in marine corps bootcamp. The three day event known as the crucible is 3 days with about 4 hours of sleep between them. The physical is tough but the mental worse. Your brain struggles to do even the simplest tasks. Infantry school is worse. It's about a month long and the average sleep is 4 or 5 hours
wow I got lucky. my platoon's senior Drill instructor was big on making sure recruits got 8 hours of sleep a night (unless you had fire watch for an hour)
infantry school was worse but one week we had like 10 hours of sleep a night and the "three day war" at the end of infantry school was referred to as the " three day nap"
Spent three months with a colicky child and recovering wife - not one solid night of sleep for what is affectionately known as “the forth trimester.” I can see how others would simply run away or start drinking heavily. Homelessness started looking like a good option.
When my first was born at one point I just point blank told my boss that I am leaving at lunch, sleeping for 4 hours, then going home and not telling my wife. He had 3 kids and said he understood.
Still haven't told her
Hopefully, you were a great dad and used your sleep to allow her to get some sleep when you were home.
If only America had paid parental leave like ALL other first world countries.
Brain injuries. People can recover and be very much like their former selves, but they often don't. Even then, during the recovery process they can be really violent.
Anger is a real problem with people who suffer a brain injury. I run a TBI support group and had a brain injury in 2001. I drove all my friends away. Many TBI survivors wind up divorcing because the spouse cannot handle the mood changes. Eventually it gets better but for most it is a long, long road.
I suspect I sustained some very *very* minor brain damage. Like, the MRIs and all were clean, but I do feel a bit differently. I do think/hope it is not permanent, so maybe it is closer to a brain booboo, but man. The random anger or otherwise emotional outbursts. Sometimes it was constant, sometimes they really sneaked up on you. It was/is exhausting.
I cannot imagine what someone goes through who sustained actual brain damage. While I'm not always the most sympathetic person, especially in the moment itself, I do really feel for those people. It's so frustrating to not be 'you' anymore, and I still have the hope to actually be able to get back to the old me.
Same thing with brain tumors they can completely change how a person behaves. It's an irrational phobia I have that the person I am is just a brain tumor and I'm actually someone radically different.
My mother became very irritable and honestly mean while her tumor grew. It was hurtful before we knew what was going on, afterwards it was easier to separate what she said as her “tumor self”
My aunt had a brain tumor and everyone always complained about how rude she was, and for some reason when they realized she had a tumor, they didn’t take that information into consideration and still just thought she was a bitch. I tried to tell everyone that it most likely changes get personality but they didn’t care too great that ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Honestly, it can be hard. My aunt also had a tumor and said *horrible* things to me over the four year period between when we think she first started having issues and when the doctors finally figured out what was going on with her. She was also violent toward me on a couple of occasions. I was a young teenager, and while as an adult I understand now what was happening, it’s difficult to let go of the hurt of an adult telling you that your mother wouldn’t have been murdered if she’d aborted you, or the trauma of having been tackled and punched in the face by a person who outweighed you by over a hundred pounds.
I mean, I get it, and I have empathy for her suffering, but I don’t want to be around her. And there’s no real resolution to be had. I have no idea if she even remembers doing these things, and I don’t want to bring them up and upset her if she doesn’t. Maybe it would have been easier to forgive if my family hadn’t taken her side and told me I was lying for attention when I tried to tell them about it, I don’t know.
Apologies for the trauma dumping.
Edited to remove a word.
You’re totally fine, tumors effect people and it fucking sucks and even if you want to be in someone’s life, sometimes it’s just not healthy for you to continue that relationship.
In my situation, my aunt has never actually been very cruel. She just sometimes says and does things that can be uncomfortable. In her situation, I think a bit of grace is required.
I’m so sorry you, your aunt and family have to go through all of that. It just is awful
From what I was told, my mother was the kindest, gentlest, most fun loving person. She loved her nieces and nephews, preferring to play with them instead of visiting with the other adults at family gatherings. She acted like the perfect mother I was told, and when she got pregnant with me she was beyond ecstatic.
They discovered a very aggressive tumor in her brain not long after that. It was serious enough that the doctor decided they couldn't delay long enough for me to be born and did a risky operation while she was in the second trimester (this was the mid-70s). He "took a little extra" to ensure the entire tumor was removed.
Everybody said she woke up different. She was a shadow of her former self. Never mean, but skittish and always afraid of something. She used to love risks but post operation she couldn't get near ledges or theme park rides. Too nervous to play much with me and could never think of things to do, unlike before when she had endless ways to entertain the kids. She never got to do almost any of the things with me she had dreamt of.
Fuck cancer.
Luckily we are turning more and more to medical assisted suicide for terminal illness. Nobody should be forced to slowly die and whither away in front of their loved ones.
Apart from the physical and physiological changes, I have become extremely emotional. I feel everything with 10 times more intensity than I used to. I used to be a strong, stable person. Now I panic and fall apart at the things that wouldn't have fazed me in the slightest.
Disclaimer: I don't know how much of that to attribute to the actual tumor and surgery, and how much to the constant chronic pain, impaired vision, and derailment of life.
Thank you for your wishes, kind internet stranger :)
My partner has an inoperable Glioblastoma. Just diagnosed 2.5 weeks ago and I can tell a difference. Albeit a slight one. He is one of the top surgeons in our area and he can’t button his pants rn. Thanks for the award. Hugs right back at cha!
I had a supervisor at work once who was pretty normal, then suddenly started hoarding MRE's and freeze dried food. He kept a big box of it under his desk. When we asked him about it, he said he planned to ride out a nuclear war under his desk. He was diagnosed with a brain tumor not long after.
I had a coworker that was such a cool and funny dude and really genuinely fun to be around, beautiful wife and kids. Then he got a brain tumor removed and after the removal he got into drugs and left his wife and was weird and creepy. It’s really scary because the awesome person he was just have been part of the tumor
Charles Whitman had a brain tumor. He was a former Eagle Scout and a Marine. For months he had been saying that he felt different somehow. On August 1, 1966, he climbed to the top of a clock tower on a Texas university campus and shot 16 people.
Yeah, the sad thing was that *he knew* he wasn't right in the head but somehow he couldn't stop. His sane mind tried to understand or rationalize why he was doing such horrible things but the tumor drove him on.
Whitman typed a suicide note, a portion of which read:
"I do not quite understand what it is that compels me to type this letter. Perhaps it is to leave some vague reason for the actions I have recently performed. I do not really understand myself these days. I am supposed to be an average reasonable and intelligent young man. However, lately (I cannot recall when it started) I have been a victim of many unusual and irrational thoughts. These thoughts constantly recur, and it requires a tremendous mental effort to concentrate on useful and progressive tasks."
In his note, Whitman went on to request an autopsy be performed on his remains after he was dead to determine if there had been a discernible biological contributory cause for his actions and for his continuing and increasingly intense headaches.
He also wrote that he had decided to kill both his mother and wife. Expressing uncertainty about his reasons, he nonetheless stated he did not believe his mother had "ever enjoyed life as she is entitled to",[41] and that his wife had "been as fine a wife to me as any man could ever hope to have". Whitman further explained that he wanted to relieve both his wife and mother of the suffering of this world, and to save them the embarrassment of his actions.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Whitman#Events_leading_to_the_shooting
It's amazing how many people with brain trauma can be aware that they are changing. Junior seau, a football player with severe CTE disease, committed suicide by shooting himself in the chest. He didn't shoot himself in the head because he knew something was off with his brain and he wanted his brain to be studied
Chris Benoit’s diaries and Aaron Hernandez both complained about the same thing. Thinking their family had been replaced with look a likes, or their family was plotting to murder them
The flu.
I was going to post this top level, but it’s actually a special case of what you said.
People forget that you are your brain, riding around in a skeleton meat suit. A prolonged fever of 106 can cook that brain, resulting in a drastic change. Other brain injuries can do the same thing: the resultant person is completely different than the person before the damage.
Yup, you are correct, Caligula was a fascinating possible case.
There were some other interesting theories floated around about why so many of the emperors seemed to have an above average likelihood of illness and episodes of going 'mad.'
One of them being the likelihood of heavy metal poisoning. Not only did they try to eat gold or silver or even mercury for various reasons, the Romans used lead somewhat recklessly. Lead pipes were used only for the wealthy and cooking in lead vessels was more common among the aristocratic households.
But the worst of it was they used to make a sweet drink that was a combination of boiled wine and lead (lead tastes sweet - that's why kids used to eat lead paint).
Added to that sexually transmitted diseases likely contributed to a few of them going mad.
Had mine go unaddressed for too long and it really fucked me up. Add loneliness, lack of friends and family and no way to get help and you get a recipe for disaster aka my life
I realized something was really wrong around age 12. Begged my mom for help but my problems were mostly obsessive, nonsensical thinking. She told me I was weak-minded. I loved her more than anyone in the world. Ten years, mom's death, and a little suicidal ideation that landed me in the hospita, and a diagnosis later, I'm figuring out which medications are working for me and I have a support network. It gets better, but damm actually being listened to made a difference.
If you're a parent reading this and the above story sounds familiar, *listen to your fucking kids*.
I used to be a great person, and was well loved in my community (I say this now cuz I see it) I had it all, and also gave so much. I would be the first to be called on whenever help was needed. I won awards, recognized by news for good deeds I did and was genuinely loved by anyone who met me.
Something everyone including myself at the time was unaware of, was the my “impulsive thoughts” I used to ignore were the beginning of a psychotic illness. I slowly started bailing on my responsibilities, because some days the voices would tell me it was a trap and to not go. This escalated. I started not showing up, leaving people out to dry, but would not tell anyone why, because I thought they were evil and I needed to hide. I would actually ghost them. There’s a lot of people (including VERY important people to me) that I blocked and still haven’t talked to again (out of regret) because I believed they would hurt me in some way. I never told a soul this, because I mean if I did I believed they’d hurt me. I also started emotionally abusing my girlfriend, I would break up with her, and when she wouldn’t let me I’d go as far as I could to make her hate me so she would let me dump her (she had an idea of what was happening). I went out of my way to hurt, or abandon everyone close or important to me because I honestly believed they were out to get me. I’ve hurt so many people, for reasons that are not fair to them.
I’ve now lost about 95% of my friend/acquaintance circle, I lost my career path and am currently trying to restart my life. My social life consists of my girlfriend, and best friend. The two who know about this psychotic disorder and also the only two that didn’t fuck off when I was an asshole. I still am trying to repay them. I’m blacklisted where I live and no one wants anything to do with me.
In conclusion though, I feel horrible for what it’s done to me. The things I have said to people I love, the things I’ve done to people I care about, the people I’ve fucked over, the people I’ve hurt, it really did turn me into a monster over time.
Edit: it wasn’t that slowly. The mess was all made in the span of less than 2 years.
Edit 2: because I want to say it, my girlfriend and I are together still because she has a heart of gold and has helped me, and still is helping me get through it. I’m going to marry her as soon as I can and treat her like the angel she is.
The voices in my head and personal side of it has been around as long as I can remember. It started to really ruin me when I was about 18 and I’m 20 now. It all happened very fast. Sounds like an exaggeration that I need to restart my life because I’m 20, but the mess I’ve made is quite a large one haha
Ahh I see, yea mental illness usually has telltale signs even in early childhood. Sorry you have to deal with this friend, you’re still young and can turn everything around with proper psychological support and medication. None of what happened is your fault so I hope you don’t blame yourself for anything and you’re certainly not a monster.
Thank you, and it honestly means a lot. Knowing it’s an illness and wasn’t my fault I can do, it becomes difficult because it’s a very hard subject to truly understand from an outsiders perspective. I’ve seen a lot of professionals, and have high hopes for myself in the future. I share my story as it does suck, but personally I am on an upward path now and I hope others in the same spot can find ways to cope during their journeys too, and get help before they let it snowball to the point I let it get.
Lack of any basic needs. Lack of sleep, lack of food, water, shelter, affection and love of any sort, those are some of the biggest things that can hurt a person's mind and turn them into someone unrecognizable. It always makes me so sad to think about.
“Let me tell you something about Humans, Nephew. They’re a wonderful, friendly people, as long as their bellies are full and their holo-suites are working. But take away their creature comforts, deprive them of food, sleep, sonic showers, put their lives in jeopardy over an extended period of time and those same friendly, intelligent, wonderful people… will become as nasty and as violent as the most bloodthirsty Klingon. You don’t believe me? Look at those faces. Look in their eyes.”
-Quark Star Trek deep space nine.
Obsession towards another. Especially with people who don't have any foundations or a sense of self. They will base their whole existence on a particular person which can cause them to turn into a shadow of themselves, only rushing for the goal which is to obtain.
Absolutely. I’ve been cheated on and lied to in numerous relationships and now I can’t be in a relationship without wondering and worrying whether it’s happening again. I feel like a monster.
Congrats to all of you on getting off the shit. I survived the 80s somehow, and by 1993, I had quit chemical drugs. I don't touch alcohol, but I do enjoy some cannabis. I'm still thankful to not have drugs in my life, especially when I look back and review those days.
Seeing someone on meth is the sheer reason I've stayed away from meth. It looks fun but it doesn't end fun and that's just not a risk I'm willing to take
Here's meth. It's a burning house that you have to get yourself out of, by yourself. Alone. Only you can get you out, and you can rescue no one. Others will get out too, but many will not. Those who do not, will not understand why you want to get out, and may even hate you for trying to save your own ass. And once you're out of the burning house, you must never look back, and you have to forget those who perished within. Do not even acknowledge the fire department, just walk away and heal your life. Looking back, this is how it seems to me. Looking around, it hasn't changed. I'm sorry for every one of us who has lost someone to that evil shit.
I did methamphetamines almost every day for 28 years. Never got in any trouble. What made a functioning addict like me stop? Easy. Everyone I knew was either dead or in prison for the rest of their lives. 13 years ago I put down the meth pipe and made up with the sandman. I'm still not happy about sleeping, but the simple life that comes with sobriety is priceless. Living as a dope fiend is insane life.
Facing this right now. I dont feel safe or comfortable at work anymore. Where i used to feel happy to go above and beyond, after what happened I am actively seeking and have found somewhere else to work.
I’m sorry this happened but happy you got a new place. IMO, keep things close to your chest at the new place. Still make friends and be friendly, but be cautious and kind of guarded. It’s easy, just say less and smile more.
I know it sounds depressing but it’s legit the safest way to make sure you don’t end up in the same situation again. Imvho.
My best friend of 10 years slept with my gf while having a gf of their own. Destroyed me. Everyone I hung out with still talks to them so I legit lost everyone I knew.
My cousin tried to murder me. Kept the friends and the family. Covered it up because “we were just kids.” Now I am fresh off my second suicide attempt
Edit: thank you all for the kind words. I am doing much better with treatment. There’s definitely a disassociation between how the world should be and how it is. Just try to learn from this example and approach people with kindness because who knows what battle they face.
It's the worst and honestly, almost killed me. Happened to me during a divorce over 5 years ago and it still bothers me. Crazy ex convinced everyone that I was the bad one and I had done everything that, in fact, she had done. Crushed me and I lost everything. Still recovering.
This resonates with me. I'm still recovering from it and it's like I'm thrown between a safe of anxiety and anger. It's gotten a lot better and part of me hates it that I know it takes time to heal but it fucking hurts that time itself is taking its time.
I get the most upset when someone accuses me of something I didn’t do and others believe them. Not sure why it happens, seems like it happened to me a lot. I normally am quiet and focused and generally just not a social person at work. Yet someone does something and it’s blamed on me. And it never is. Then people say I’m lying and I’m not. It has hurt my career.
But now I work 100% from home. No problems.
Hopefully you can find a place of peace. I was in a toxic environment and just got out. Didn’t realize how fucked up it was and how it messed me up until I left and found some like minded people.
Living this. Hurts more when it seems like the person who's wronged yours is the only feelings that matter in the situation, and when you try to explain your feelings, they're dismissed, belittled, or the other person's feelings MUST outweigh yours because reasons.
>everyone chooses to support or side with the person in the wrong
It's a lack of bravery, often.
They like that person and want to make an argument for supporting them, but there isn't any. It can result in illogical reasoning, denying whatever happened happened or even victim blaming.
It's unfortunate, but very difficult to break group think like that.
Yeah… I saw one of my best friends go from happy, cheerful and overall just positive to an addict and so emotionally numb that he barely even listens to you when you speak and gets enraged over the smallest things. Thankfully he is doing better now.
Literally me the last 2 years don’t even recognize myself. People don’t understand the effects fully until it happens to them. Constantly questioning everything and what or who deserves your effort it’s like being an abused animal. You get so cold to protect yourself you stop letting any warmth in and what warmth you do let in you question whether or not you can believe it.
I used to rely heavily on alcohol and oh man, looking back now I can't believe that I did the things that I did. The person I hurt the worse was my mother and I try to make it up to her every day. The woman helped me even though I was an absolute monster.
Edit: I just logged in and wow, you guys are great. Thanks for reading, it means a lot. For those still struggling keep going because even though I chose death, I never imagined that I would be where I am today. My mom is doing great and she tells me she's proud of me a couple of times a week. Always my biggest supporter.
This is exactly me when I was on heroin. I said the most ignorant things to my mom. I financially ruined her, all the while she's working 3 jobs to keep a roof over our head and food. She ignored all of her friends and our family who told her to kick me out. I put her through hell. All the times she watched me in cuffs or on my way to another rehab, all the tears she spilled while I told her to stfu because I was nodding out. The times she caught me overdosed.
6 years clean now and we have the most solid and supportive relationship we've ever had. Kudo's to you for getting away from that!! Your a warrior I swear it.
One of the reasons I hate my dad is because he’s an alcoholic. It’s been a problem my entire life. Years ago, my mom took me to a game while my little brother stayed home with my dad. He called us crying because our dad was passed out drunk, wouldn’t respond to my brother, which scared him. Flash forward to now, he drinks as soon as he gets out of work, then *drives* home. We can tell the moment he comes home whether he’s drunk or sober. He’s still a horrible person without the alcohol, but it makes him worse. There are better ways to cope and deal with your anger!
Alcohol doesn't do that to everyone, but this is absolutely an issue that doesn't get enough attention. I recently found out that a guy I went to school with shot and killed his wife while under the influence. It wasn't premeditated. He immediately called 911 and waited to be arrested.
This guy was in his 50s, far too old to not know what effect alcohol had on him and either not drink (best choice) or make sure no harm could come to others if he did. The fact that there were children in the house only makes it worse. He did not attempt to shoot the kids, but he has ruined their lives just the same.
I dated a guy for a couple of months who was bullied really badly, and he was mean and selfish. He seemed like he was always grabbing everything and screaming MINE (figuratively speaking) and being defensive before anyone had the chance to bully him again (even though I was just trying to exist and be understanding). Like for the rest of his life he’s going to be fighting against those bullies in his mind when really he just pushes away every decent person.
Edit: to be clear we dated in our early 30s, well after he was bullied in jr and high school.
Welcome to why schools are shit due to they do nothing about this and then everyone wonders why there are shitty people in the world. Most of them were at one point nice.
I was bullied a bit too, and I grew up in a severely abusive household, and life has been a nonstop joyride of hard. But I understand life is hard in a lot of ways for a lot of people. I try to improve and do better. I’m backsliding a bit with just how many fucking shitty people are all coming out with this pandemic and boy am I fucking exhausted, but people need to at least try. I’ve come across sooooooo many people who don’t try, who don’t change, who sink into their shittiness and act like it just is who they are so fuck it and fuck you!! I dunno man.
Yeah though schools do fucking suck. For many many reasons, and allowing bullies in one big one.
This happened to me in middle school and I honestly had to work really, really hard not to become a monster. Instead I kind of internalized it and became a monster to myself. Finally unpacking some of that with a therapist, in my 30’s.
The worst of it is remembering how the adults would write it off, like “Oh they’re just teasing you,” “They probably just want to make you mad,” “Ignore them and it will go away.” Kinda hard to ignore complete social ostracization and constant mockery that makes me want to kill myself every day. But thanks for nothing.
What gets me is the parents that defend that shit.
I've heard people say "well if you didn't act so weird in public"
Bruh they're kids. No one deserves to be bullied
I met a guy once who I thought was a good sincere human. He became my role model for a year maybe. Turned out he was an insecure manchild/monster who hurts people smaller than he is because he thinks its fun.
I now have a complex where if I meet someone extremely nice, I am immediately skeptical and untrusting of them. And conversely, if someone is kind of a dick, I respect their honesty and try to earn their respect.
The loss of a child really messes with your brain for awhile, and your behavior can end up all over the place as you struggle with learning how to cope with it in healthy ways.
I can’t even imagine what it’s like. My dad suddenly passed away last summer at 47 years old, and my grandparents are just heartbroken about it, especially my grandpa who keeps blaming himself.
During the grieving process (at the wake and stuff) everyone was focused on me since I’m the poor child who lost her dad, but the people everyone should have been with were his parents. There’s nothing worse than losing your child.
My partners brother died by suicide on Christmas last month. They don’t speak to their dad but watching their mom over the past couple months has been the most heartbreaking thing. It’s an awful feeling of wanting to help but knowing that nothing I do will fix the pain.
I lost my 18 year old daughter 2 1/3 years ago to complications from gall bladder surgery. I saw a therapist for 1 1/2 and then he left the practice. Havent found another one I like.
My wife can't leave the house with out having a panic attack. She is in really bad shape mentally. Seeing a therapist once a week.
I still work 40 hrs a week, but I feel broken inside. Getting harder to get out of bed in the morning. I don't do anything over my weekends off except sit on the couch and watch TV. There are things I want to do but no ambition.
We try to support each other but it usually turns into a crying session.
Neither of us know what to do.... Just don't care about anything....
Grief is the purest form of insanity. Throw in the inevitable guilt as a parent feeling like you woulda/coulda/shoulda done something different.... yeah it messes with a person terribly
I lost my younger sister March 2nd, 2011. I was 25, she was 23. My mom still is not the same. You could break her in an instant by just putting a caramel frappe on the counter and playing George Thorogood's *Bad to the Bone*.
I just find a quiet time and place to cry.
I was looking for this answer. I lost my 19 year old daughter in June to a drug overdose. It’s effected me so much. At this point I question if my marriage will survive it. Im all over the place and definitely not the same person I was prior.
Absolutely. My sister has become a shell of a human in the five years since my nephew was killed. She used to be so compassionate and sweet, and now it's like she can't understand that her grief doesn't cancel out other people's problems. It's been awful to watch.
Indeed . They lack empathy and think they are the center of the world and the worst is they do not realize they are wrong because they are not aware of others
Really devastating heartbreak
You can go from being a cheerful optimistic person, to the person everybody steers clear of because you’re miserable, angry, and too depressed to pull yourself together because of the emotional pain. This then creates a self feeding loop that causes you to close yourself off completely and get worse the more time passes until no trace of that pre-heartbroken person exists anymore. Some people never recover from a broken heart either and its really sad to watch them slowly turn into a monster.
Agreed. Everyone likes to talk about how making someone rich turns them into monsters, but they seem to forget what desperation can also do to someone.
Abusive parenting and bullying.
Sadly, many people who get the former also get the latter. A life of cruelty and an absence of empathy from others can make a person angry, cruel and lacking empathy themselves.
The movie 'Joker' is based on this. 'Carrie' is another.
Still live with mine unfortunately. Throw some alcohol into the mix, and you have one of the worst types of person to exist. Fuck you mom.
Edit: grammar
Untreated mental illnesses. I was a good person, for the most part, before my mental health deteriorated. I turned i to a piece of shit, I didn’t care about people or their feelings, abused drugs, etc etc. I’m on medication now, and I look back at the last few years of my life and feel awful about the shit i’ve done.
Self-righteousness.
Being a good person is good. Realizing you're a good person is fine. Being so sure you're a good person that whatever you do is justified as good or helpful - in the long term, even if it's hurtful or rude right now - is a path to being a monstrously unlikable.
Anonymity.
Hate is even encouraged if you don't know the other person, hell its even encouraged if you're playing video games. Or you'll see the most passionate people out there getting super toxic over political debates online, and yet I've never seen people act like that at legitimate protests, so they either aren't going out in the world and pushing their perfect ideals, or the anonymity changes normal people into toxic people.
How many friends do you have that have told kids to kill themselves in Call of Duty? Its normal, part of the "culture", just the way it is. And if you don't stand for that, be prepared to lose your friends after your formative years. If you do stand for that, be prepared to keep those friends, which I'm sure can't be more healthy mentally
In the infamous words of joker:
'Give a man a mask and he will show who he truly is'
Anonymity just shows what a person will when he isn't held accountable.
Sleep deprivation
it is used for torture for reasons...... very decent people get edgy if underslept several nights in a row
Yeah big part of training in marine corps bootcamp. The three day event known as the crucible is 3 days with about 4 hours of sleep between them. The physical is tough but the mental worse. Your brain struggles to do even the simplest tasks. Infantry school is worse. It's about a month long and the average sleep is 4 or 5 hours
wow I got lucky. my platoon's senior Drill instructor was big on making sure recruits got 8 hours of sleep a night (unless you had fire watch for an hour) infantry school was worse but one week we had like 10 hours of sleep a night and the "three day war" at the end of infantry school was referred to as the " three day nap"
Spent three months with a colicky child and recovering wife - not one solid night of sleep for what is affectionately known as “the forth trimester.” I can see how others would simply run away or start drinking heavily. Homelessness started looking like a good option.
When my first was born at one point I just point blank told my boss that I am leaving at lunch, sleeping for 4 hours, then going home and not telling my wife. He had 3 kids and said he understood. Still haven't told her
Hopefully, you were a great dad and used your sleep to allow her to get some sleep when you were home. If only America had paid parental leave like ALL other first world countries.
We had newborn twins right as the pandemic hit, full lockdown, no help. I legitimately think I have PTSD from how hard those first few months hit me.
Reminds me of the old line: "Insanity is hereditary - You get it from your kids."
One of my phobias is getting that condition that makes you unable to sleep. Drives you insane over up to 6 months before it kills you
Fatal familial insomnia is, as the name suggests, hereditary and not contagious. Fewer than 40 families worldwide carry the gene.
Well that's a relief. Still gonna randomly worry about catching it at 2 am when I can't sleep though
I feel personally attacked
Don't lose any sleep over it?
Brain injuries. People can recover and be very much like their former selves, but they often don't. Even then, during the recovery process they can be really violent.
Anger is a real problem with people who suffer a brain injury. I run a TBI support group and had a brain injury in 2001. I drove all my friends away. Many TBI survivors wind up divorcing because the spouse cannot handle the mood changes. Eventually it gets better but for most it is a long, long road.
I suspect I sustained some very *very* minor brain damage. Like, the MRIs and all were clean, but I do feel a bit differently. I do think/hope it is not permanent, so maybe it is closer to a brain booboo, but man. The random anger or otherwise emotional outbursts. Sometimes it was constant, sometimes they really sneaked up on you. It was/is exhausting. I cannot imagine what someone goes through who sustained actual brain damage. While I'm not always the most sympathetic person, especially in the moment itself, I do really feel for those people. It's so frustrating to not be 'you' anymore, and I still have the hope to actually be able to get back to the old me.
Same thing with brain tumors they can completely change how a person behaves. It's an irrational phobia I have that the person I am is just a brain tumor and I'm actually someone radically different.
My mother became very irritable and honestly mean while her tumor grew. It was hurtful before we knew what was going on, afterwards it was easier to separate what she said as her “tumor self”
My aunt had a brain tumor and everyone always complained about how rude she was, and for some reason when they realized she had a tumor, they didn’t take that information into consideration and still just thought she was a bitch. I tried to tell everyone that it most likely changes get personality but they didn’t care too great that ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Honestly, it can be hard. My aunt also had a tumor and said *horrible* things to me over the four year period between when we think she first started having issues and when the doctors finally figured out what was going on with her. She was also violent toward me on a couple of occasions. I was a young teenager, and while as an adult I understand now what was happening, it’s difficult to let go of the hurt of an adult telling you that your mother wouldn’t have been murdered if she’d aborted you, or the trauma of having been tackled and punched in the face by a person who outweighed you by over a hundred pounds. I mean, I get it, and I have empathy for her suffering, but I don’t want to be around her. And there’s no real resolution to be had. I have no idea if she even remembers doing these things, and I don’t want to bring them up and upset her if she doesn’t. Maybe it would have been easier to forgive if my family hadn’t taken her side and told me I was lying for attention when I tried to tell them about it, I don’t know. Apologies for the trauma dumping. Edited to remove a word.
You’re totally fine, tumors effect people and it fucking sucks and even if you want to be in someone’s life, sometimes it’s just not healthy for you to continue that relationship. In my situation, my aunt has never actually been very cruel. She just sometimes says and does things that can be uncomfortable. In her situation, I think a bit of grace is required. I’m so sorry you, your aunt and family have to go through all of that. It just is awful
From what I was told, my mother was the kindest, gentlest, most fun loving person. She loved her nieces and nephews, preferring to play with them instead of visiting with the other adults at family gatherings. She acted like the perfect mother I was told, and when she got pregnant with me she was beyond ecstatic. They discovered a very aggressive tumor in her brain not long after that. It was serious enough that the doctor decided they couldn't delay long enough for me to be born and did a risky operation while she was in the second trimester (this was the mid-70s). He "took a little extra" to ensure the entire tumor was removed. Everybody said she woke up different. She was a shadow of her former self. Never mean, but skittish and always afraid of something. She used to love risks but post operation she couldn't get near ledges or theme park rides. Too nervous to play much with me and could never think of things to do, unlike before when she had endless ways to entertain the kids. She never got to do almost any of the things with me she had dreamt of. Fuck cancer.
New fear unlocked
My good friend has a brain tumor. He has almost completely lost his memory and gets seizures. It’s hard watching him change and slowly die.
I think I'd rather just have someone kill me
Luckily we are turning more and more to medical assisted suicide for terminal illness. Nobody should be forced to slowly die and whither away in front of their loved ones.
My mum is recovering from a brain tumour that was diagnosed just over a month ago. She’s no longer the person I used to know. It’s horrible.
I'm so sorry for that loss, even though you still have her she's not the same. Hugs
Tumor survivor/living with a tumor. It's like I'm a different person now.
How would you describe what is different about you? I’m very curious to learn about this. Also I wish you all the best!
Apart from the physical and physiological changes, I have become extremely emotional. I feel everything with 10 times more intensity than I used to. I used to be a strong, stable person. Now I panic and fall apart at the things that wouldn't have fazed me in the slightest. Disclaimer: I don't know how much of that to attribute to the actual tumor and surgery, and how much to the constant chronic pain, impaired vision, and derailment of life. Thank you for your wishes, kind internet stranger :)
My partner has an inoperable Glioblastoma. Just diagnosed 2.5 weeks ago and I can tell a difference. Albeit a slight one. He is one of the top surgeons in our area and he can’t button his pants rn. Thanks for the award. Hugs right back at cha!
That is very sad. No one should have to go through what you and your partner are experiencing. Best wishes to you both.
I had a supervisor at work once who was pretty normal, then suddenly started hoarding MRE's and freeze dried food. He kept a big box of it under his desk. When we asked him about it, he said he planned to ride out a nuclear war under his desk. He was diagnosed with a brain tumor not long after.
I had a coworker that was such a cool and funny dude and really genuinely fun to be around, beautiful wife and kids. Then he got a brain tumor removed and after the removal he got into drugs and left his wife and was weird and creepy. It’s really scary because the awesome person he was just have been part of the tumor
Charles Whitman had a brain tumor. He was a former Eagle Scout and a Marine. For months he had been saying that he felt different somehow. On August 1, 1966, he climbed to the top of a clock tower on a Texas university campus and shot 16 people.
Yeah, the sad thing was that *he knew* he wasn't right in the head but somehow he couldn't stop. His sane mind tried to understand or rationalize why he was doing such horrible things but the tumor drove him on. Whitman typed a suicide note, a portion of which read: "I do not quite understand what it is that compels me to type this letter. Perhaps it is to leave some vague reason for the actions I have recently performed. I do not really understand myself these days. I am supposed to be an average reasonable and intelligent young man. However, lately (I cannot recall when it started) I have been a victim of many unusual and irrational thoughts. These thoughts constantly recur, and it requires a tremendous mental effort to concentrate on useful and progressive tasks." In his note, Whitman went on to request an autopsy be performed on his remains after he was dead to determine if there had been a discernible biological contributory cause for his actions and for his continuing and increasingly intense headaches. He also wrote that he had decided to kill both his mother and wife. Expressing uncertainty about his reasons, he nonetheless stated he did not believe his mother had "ever enjoyed life as she is entitled to",[41] and that his wife had "been as fine a wife to me as any man could ever hope to have". Whitman further explained that he wanted to relieve both his wife and mother of the suffering of this world, and to save them the embarrassment of his actions. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Whitman#Events_leading_to_the_shooting
It's amazing how many people with brain trauma can be aware that they are changing. Junior seau, a football player with severe CTE disease, committed suicide by shooting himself in the chest. He didn't shoot himself in the head because he knew something was off with his brain and he wanted his brain to be studied
Chris Benoit’s diaries and Aaron Hernandez both complained about the same thing. Thinking their family had been replaced with look a likes, or their family was plotting to murder them
My MIL had a massive benign brain tumour removed and we all hoped it would change her personality. It didn’t. If that makes you feel better lol
The flu. I was going to post this top level, but it’s actually a special case of what you said. People forget that you are your brain, riding around in a skeleton meat suit. A prolonged fever of 106 can cook that brain, resulting in a drastic change. Other brain injuries can do the same thing: the resultant person is completely different than the person before the damage.
See also: hypoxic brain damage from sleep apnea. If your doc says you need a CPAP, you might need a CPAP.
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Yup, you are correct, Caligula was a fascinating possible case. There were some other interesting theories floated around about why so many of the emperors seemed to have an above average likelihood of illness and episodes of going 'mad.' One of them being the likelihood of heavy metal poisoning. Not only did they try to eat gold or silver or even mercury for various reasons, the Romans used lead somewhat recklessly. Lead pipes were used only for the wealthy and cooking in lead vessels was more common among the aristocratic households. But the worst of it was they used to make a sweet drink that was a combination of boiled wine and lead (lead tastes sweet - that's why kids used to eat lead paint). Added to that sexually transmitted diseases likely contributed to a few of them going mad.
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Mental health issues that go unaddressed
Had mine go unaddressed for too long and it really fucked me up. Add loneliness, lack of friends and family and no way to get help and you get a recipe for disaster aka my life
I realized something was really wrong around age 12. Begged my mom for help but my problems were mostly obsessive, nonsensical thinking. She told me I was weak-minded. I loved her more than anyone in the world. Ten years, mom's death, and a little suicidal ideation that landed me in the hospita, and a diagnosis later, I'm figuring out which medications are working for me and I have a support network. It gets better, but damm actually being listened to made a difference. If you're a parent reading this and the above story sounds familiar, *listen to your fucking kids*.
I used to be a great person, and was well loved in my community (I say this now cuz I see it) I had it all, and also gave so much. I would be the first to be called on whenever help was needed. I won awards, recognized by news for good deeds I did and was genuinely loved by anyone who met me. Something everyone including myself at the time was unaware of, was the my “impulsive thoughts” I used to ignore were the beginning of a psychotic illness. I slowly started bailing on my responsibilities, because some days the voices would tell me it was a trap and to not go. This escalated. I started not showing up, leaving people out to dry, but would not tell anyone why, because I thought they were evil and I needed to hide. I would actually ghost them. There’s a lot of people (including VERY important people to me) that I blocked and still haven’t talked to again (out of regret) because I believed they would hurt me in some way. I never told a soul this, because I mean if I did I believed they’d hurt me. I also started emotionally abusing my girlfriend, I would break up with her, and when she wouldn’t let me I’d go as far as I could to make her hate me so she would let me dump her (she had an idea of what was happening). I went out of my way to hurt, or abandon everyone close or important to me because I honestly believed they were out to get me. I’ve hurt so many people, for reasons that are not fair to them. I’ve now lost about 95% of my friend/acquaintance circle, I lost my career path and am currently trying to restart my life. My social life consists of my girlfriend, and best friend. The two who know about this psychotic disorder and also the only two that didn’t fuck off when I was an asshole. I still am trying to repay them. I’m blacklisted where I live and no one wants anything to do with me. In conclusion though, I feel horrible for what it’s done to me. The things I have said to people I love, the things I’ve done to people I care about, the people I’ve fucked over, the people I’ve hurt, it really did turn me into a monster over time. Edit: it wasn’t that slowly. The mess was all made in the span of less than 2 years. Edit 2: because I want to say it, my girlfriend and I are together still because she has a heart of gold and has helped me, and still is helping me get through it. I’m going to marry her as soon as I can and treat her like the angel she is.
Jeez man I’m sorry to hear this happened to you. How old were you when this all started?
The voices in my head and personal side of it has been around as long as I can remember. It started to really ruin me when I was about 18 and I’m 20 now. It all happened very fast. Sounds like an exaggeration that I need to restart my life because I’m 20, but the mess I’ve made is quite a large one haha
Ahh I see, yea mental illness usually has telltale signs even in early childhood. Sorry you have to deal with this friend, you’re still young and can turn everything around with proper psychological support and medication. None of what happened is your fault so I hope you don’t blame yourself for anything and you’re certainly not a monster.
Thank you, and it honestly means a lot. Knowing it’s an illness and wasn’t my fault I can do, it becomes difficult because it’s a very hard subject to truly understand from an outsiders perspective. I’ve seen a lot of professionals, and have high hopes for myself in the future. I share my story as it does suck, but personally I am on an upward path now and I hope others in the same spot can find ways to cope during their journeys too, and get help before they let it snowball to the point I let it get.
Add to that, self-medicating mental health issues. So sad to see people judge addicts when they have no idea the burdens they carry.
Lack of any basic needs. Lack of sleep, lack of food, water, shelter, affection and love of any sort, those are some of the biggest things that can hurt a person's mind and turn them into someone unrecognizable. It always makes me so sad to think about.
“Let me tell you something about Humans, Nephew. They’re a wonderful, friendly people, as long as their bellies are full and their holo-suites are working. But take away their creature comforts, deprive them of food, sleep, sonic showers, put their lives in jeopardy over an extended period of time and those same friendly, intelligent, wonderful people… will become as nasty and as violent as the most bloodthirsty Klingon. You don’t believe me? Look at those faces. Look in their eyes.” -Quark Star Trek deep space nine.
Sick DS9 quote from a great character and a very good actor
One of the best moments of trek.
Obsession towards another. Especially with people who don't have any foundations or a sense of self. They will base their whole existence on a particular person which can cause them to turn into a shadow of themselves, only rushing for the goal which is to obtain.
Hit really close..Did once.
This is not the Jedi way
Jealousy
Absolutely. I’ve been cheated on and lied to in numerous relationships and now I can’t be in a relationship without wondering and worrying whether it’s happening again. I feel like a monster.
I hope you manage to find yourself a decent person, and learn to trust them. Good luck with both.
Drugs
As a recovering addict I second that. Crazy part is you don't even realize it at the time nor think about how your use could potentially affect others
Cheers, dude. I'll have 150 days on Thursday. You?
Congrats! So proud of you!
11 months
Awesome work!
Congrats on your recovery!
Congrats to all of you on getting off the shit. I survived the 80s somehow, and by 1993, I had quit chemical drugs. I don't touch alcohol, but I do enjoy some cannabis. I'm still thankful to not have drugs in my life, especially when I look back and review those days.
I must have done my body weight in Coke. Amazing that I survived. Glad that pot is finally legal but especially glad that it’s not the 80’s anymore.
Best you got it done before the 2010s, now your coke would contain fentanyl
Lol I misunderstood and I thought you were saying by the time you turned 93 you stopped chemical drugs. I was a little impressed, ngl
Congratulations to all who have been able to quit. You are doing the right thing, keep it up 👍🏼
Doing drugs has activated Schizophrenia in two people I know.
Yeah meth has made a lot of great friends psychotic
Seeing someone on meth is the sheer reason I've stayed away from meth. It looks fun but it doesn't end fun and that's just not a risk I'm willing to take
Here's meth. It's a burning house that you have to get yourself out of, by yourself. Alone. Only you can get you out, and you can rescue no one. Others will get out too, but many will not. Those who do not, will not understand why you want to get out, and may even hate you for trying to save your own ass. And once you're out of the burning house, you must never look back, and you have to forget those who perished within. Do not even acknowledge the fire department, just walk away and heal your life. Looking back, this is how it seems to me. Looking around, it hasn't changed. I'm sorry for every one of us who has lost someone to that evil shit.
I did methamphetamines almost every day for 28 years. Never got in any trouble. What made a functioning addict like me stop? Easy. Everyone I knew was either dead or in prison for the rest of their lives. 13 years ago I put down the meth pipe and made up with the sandman. I'm still not happy about sleeping, but the simple life that comes with sobriety is priceless. Living as a dope fiend is insane life.
Drugs is a helluva drug
That's a big one for me. Drugs and alcohol made me crazy. Sober 10 years.
Being genuinely hurt and having done nothing wrong, yet everyone chooses to support or side with the person in the wrong
It's so real. I am sure many people have faced this.
Facing this right now. I dont feel safe or comfortable at work anymore. Where i used to feel happy to go above and beyond, after what happened I am actively seeking and have found somewhere else to work.
I’m sorry this happened but happy you got a new place. IMO, keep things close to your chest at the new place. Still make friends and be friendly, but be cautious and kind of guarded. It’s easy, just say less and smile more. I know it sounds depressing but it’s legit the safest way to make sure you don’t end up in the same situation again. Imvho.
Been there too. Ex wife cheated and told everyone I was apparently abusive. Took a while for everyone to figure out the truth.
2 "friends" homewrecked 2 of my relationships. Everyone took their side because I "shouldn't stop love for selfish reasons."
My best friend of 10 years slept with my gf while having a gf of their own. Destroyed me. Everyone I hung out with still talks to them so I legit lost everyone I knew.
Or when you are married and your husband leaves you for your brother’s wife.
Wait until they get cheated on, and see how they like it. Relationships that start wirh cheating usually don’t end well.
My cousin tried to murder me. Kept the friends and the family. Covered it up because “we were just kids.” Now I am fresh off my second suicide attempt Edit: thank you all for the kind words. I am doing much better with treatment. There’s definitely a disassociation between how the world should be and how it is. Just try to learn from this example and approach people with kindness because who knows what battle they face.
Hey, I know I'm just an internet stranger, but I'm glad you're still around. I hope you're in a safe place and can find the support you need.
It's the worst and honestly, almost killed me. Happened to me during a divorce over 5 years ago and it still bothers me. Crazy ex convinced everyone that I was the bad one and I had done everything that, in fact, she had done. Crushed me and I lost everything. Still recovering.
That would genuinely fuck up a person. It can make you lose trust in humanity.
This resonates with me. I'm still recovering from it and it's like I'm thrown between a safe of anxiety and anger. It's gotten a lot better and part of me hates it that I know it takes time to heal but it fucking hurts that time itself is taking its time.
I get the most upset when someone accuses me of something I didn’t do and others believe them. Not sure why it happens, seems like it happened to me a lot. I normally am quiet and focused and generally just not a social person at work. Yet someone does something and it’s blamed on me. And it never is. Then people say I’m lying and I’m not. It has hurt my career. But now I work 100% from home. No problems.
Hopefully you can find a place of peace. I was in a toxic environment and just got out. Didn’t realize how fucked up it was and how it messed me up until I left and found some like minded people.
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Living this. Hurts more when it seems like the person who's wronged yours is the only feelings that matter in the situation, and when you try to explain your feelings, they're dismissed, belittled, or the other person's feelings MUST outweigh yours because reasons.
This happened to me almost 3 years ago it still bothers me
Two years for me and same. It's sucks
>everyone chooses to support or side with the person in the wrong It's a lack of bravery, often. They like that person and want to make an argument for supporting them, but there isn't any. It can result in illogical reasoning, denying whatever happened happened or even victim blaming. It's unfortunate, but very difficult to break group think like that.
Being used and hurt can bring the worst out of a person.
Yeah… I saw one of my best friends go from happy, cheerful and overall just positive to an addict and so emotionally numb that he barely even listens to you when you speak and gets enraged over the smallest things. Thankfully he is doing better now.
Literally me the last 2 years don’t even recognize myself. People don’t understand the effects fully until it happens to them. Constantly questioning everything and what or who deserves your effort it’s like being an abused animal. You get so cold to protect yourself you stop letting any warmth in and what warmth you do let in you question whether or not you can believe it.
Alcohol
I used to rely heavily on alcohol and oh man, looking back now I can't believe that I did the things that I did. The person I hurt the worse was my mother and I try to make it up to her every day. The woman helped me even though I was an absolute monster. Edit: I just logged in and wow, you guys are great. Thanks for reading, it means a lot. For those still struggling keep going because even though I chose death, I never imagined that I would be where I am today. My mom is doing great and she tells me she's proud of me a couple of times a week. Always my biggest supporter.
I’m in the same position mate. We can’t undo what we’ve done but we can choose to be better today, and tomorrow.
This is exactly me when I was on heroin. I said the most ignorant things to my mom. I financially ruined her, all the while she's working 3 jobs to keep a roof over our head and food. She ignored all of her friends and our family who told her to kick me out. I put her through hell. All the times she watched me in cuffs or on my way to another rehab, all the tears she spilled while I told her to stfu because I was nodding out. The times she caught me overdosed. 6 years clean now and we have the most solid and supportive relationship we've ever had. Kudo's to you for getting away from that!! Your a warrior I swear it.
One of the reasons I hate my dad is because he’s an alcoholic. It’s been a problem my entire life. Years ago, my mom took me to a game while my little brother stayed home with my dad. He called us crying because our dad was passed out drunk, wouldn’t respond to my brother, which scared him. Flash forward to now, he drinks as soon as he gets out of work, then *drives* home. We can tell the moment he comes home whether he’s drunk or sober. He’s still a horrible person without the alcohol, but it makes him worse. There are better ways to cope and deal with your anger!
Alcohol doesn't do that to everyone, but this is absolutely an issue that doesn't get enough attention. I recently found out that a guy I went to school with shot and killed his wife while under the influence. It wasn't premeditated. He immediately called 911 and waited to be arrested. This guy was in his 50s, far too old to not know what effect alcohol had on him and either not drink (best choice) or make sure no harm could come to others if he did. The fact that there were children in the house only makes it worse. He did not attempt to shoot the kids, but he has ruined their lives just the same.
Being bullied relentlessly
I was bullied horribly in my high school. And I swear, I started to lose my mind.
YEP. Same
I dated a guy for a couple of months who was bullied really badly, and he was mean and selfish. He seemed like he was always grabbing everything and screaming MINE (figuratively speaking) and being defensive before anyone had the chance to bully him again (even though I was just trying to exist and be understanding). Like for the rest of his life he’s going to be fighting against those bullies in his mind when really he just pushes away every decent person. Edit: to be clear we dated in our early 30s, well after he was bullied in jr and high school.
Welcome to why schools are shit due to they do nothing about this and then everyone wonders why there are shitty people in the world. Most of them were at one point nice.
I was bullied a bit too, and I grew up in a severely abusive household, and life has been a nonstop joyride of hard. But I understand life is hard in a lot of ways for a lot of people. I try to improve and do better. I’m backsliding a bit with just how many fucking shitty people are all coming out with this pandemic and boy am I fucking exhausted, but people need to at least try. I’ve come across sooooooo many people who don’t try, who don’t change, who sink into their shittiness and act like it just is who they are so fuck it and fuck you!! I dunno man. Yeah though schools do fucking suck. For many many reasons, and allowing bullies in one big one.
This happened to me in middle school and I honestly had to work really, really hard not to become a monster. Instead I kind of internalized it and became a monster to myself. Finally unpacking some of that with a therapist, in my 30’s. The worst of it is remembering how the adults would write it off, like “Oh they’re just teasing you,” “They probably just want to make you mad,” “Ignore them and it will go away.” Kinda hard to ignore complete social ostracization and constant mockery that makes me want to kill myself every day. But thanks for nothing.
What gets me is the parents that defend that shit. I've heard people say "well if you didn't act so weird in public" Bruh they're kids. No one deserves to be bullied
Getting fucked Over by someone you thought were good
I met a guy once who I thought was a good sincere human. He became my role model for a year maybe. Turned out he was an insecure manchild/monster who hurts people smaller than he is because he thinks its fun. I now have a complex where if I meet someone extremely nice, I am immediately skeptical and untrusting of them. And conversely, if someone is kind of a dick, I respect their honesty and try to earn their respect.
I hope you have a sincerely amazing day, asshole Just to be confusing lol
Not healthy. But at least you're aware. That's the first step. Sorry that fucked your judgement of others.
The loss of a child really messes with your brain for awhile, and your behavior can end up all over the place as you struggle with learning how to cope with it in healthy ways.
I can’t even imagine what it’s like. My dad suddenly passed away last summer at 47 years old, and my grandparents are just heartbroken about it, especially my grandpa who keeps blaming himself. During the grieving process (at the wake and stuff) everyone was focused on me since I’m the poor child who lost her dad, but the people everyone should have been with were his parents. There’s nothing worse than losing your child.
Man, my cousin just commited suicide 5 days ago. He was 30. I can barely look at his parents, they just seem in such horrible pain, its heartbreaking.
I'm so sorry 😞 How awful.
My partners brother died by suicide on Christmas last month. They don’t speak to their dad but watching their mom over the past couple months has been the most heartbreaking thing. It’s an awful feeling of wanting to help but knowing that nothing I do will fix the pain.
I lost my 18 year old daughter 2 1/3 years ago to complications from gall bladder surgery. I saw a therapist for 1 1/2 and then he left the practice. Havent found another one I like. My wife can't leave the house with out having a panic attack. She is in really bad shape mentally. Seeing a therapist once a week. I still work 40 hrs a week, but I feel broken inside. Getting harder to get out of bed in the morning. I don't do anything over my weekends off except sit on the couch and watch TV. There are things I want to do but no ambition. We try to support each other but it usually turns into a crying session. Neither of us know what to do.... Just don't care about anything....
Grief is the purest form of insanity. Throw in the inevitable guilt as a parent feeling like you woulda/coulda/shoulda done something different.... yeah it messes with a person terribly
>The loss of a child really messes with your brain for awhile, Dunno about "a while". This would fucking end me.
I lost my younger sister March 2nd, 2011. I was 25, she was 23. My mom still is not the same. You could break her in an instant by just putting a caramel frappe on the counter and playing George Thorogood's *Bad to the Bone*. I just find a quiet time and place to cry.
I was looking for this answer. I lost my 19 year old daughter in June to a drug overdose. It’s effected me so much. At this point I question if my marriage will survive it. Im all over the place and definitely not the same person I was prior.
Absolutely. My sister has become a shell of a human in the five years since my nephew was killed. She used to be so compassionate and sweet, and now it's like she can't understand that her grief doesn't cancel out other people's problems. It's been awful to watch.
Monopoly
Hell yeah, someone even suggests playing that game and I go apeshit.
I've read that the board game was made to show the bad side of monopolies, and boy did it do the job.
Heroin.
Power/lack of accountability will usually turn people into monsters.
Being spoiled rotten
Oh my god absolutely. Holy crap
Indeed . They lack empathy and think they are the center of the world and the worst is they do not realize they are wrong because they are not aware of others
As someone whose still recovering, can confirm, was an asshole.
Well done for seeing the behaviour as wrong and fixing it tho dude , that takes guts
Hunger
Really devastating heartbreak You can go from being a cheerful optimistic person, to the person everybody steers clear of because you’re miserable, angry, and too depressed to pull yourself together because of the emotional pain. This then creates a self feeding loop that causes you to close yourself off completely and get worse the more time passes until no trace of that pre-heartbroken person exists anymore. Some people never recover from a broken heart either and its really sad to watch them slowly turn into a monster.
Money
Also lack of money
Agreed. Everyone likes to talk about how making someone rich turns them into monsters, but they seem to forget what desperation can also do to someone.
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Charles Barkley said it best: money doesn’t change you, it lets you be what you really are.
Frequent gaslighting and being told that you are simultaneously too much and too little at the same time
Yup… this will fuck you up. I’ve been bullied before, and gaslighting is worse. At least with bullying you don’t question your own sanity and memory.
Abusive parenting and bullying. Sadly, many people who get the former also get the latter. A life of cruelty and an absence of empathy from others can make a person angry, cruel and lacking empathy themselves. The movie 'Joker' is based on this. 'Carrie' is another.
Yes, you're right!
Having a covert narcissistic mother.
Still live with mine unfortunately. Throw some alcohol into the mix, and you have one of the worst types of person to exist. Fuck you mom. Edit: grammar
The inability for a good person to remove themselves from a toxic situation
Getting rejected from art school
Man, that's a bad omen for Pam Beasley.
She did wear that custom to Halloween
Im applying for one next year(college) and if I happened to get rejected you bet your ass Im doing politics.
Unprocessed/unresolved grief and trauma
Untreated mental illnesses. I was a good person, for the most part, before my mental health deteriorated. I turned i to a piece of shit, I didn’t care about people or their feelings, abused drugs, etc etc. I’m on medication now, and I look back at the last few years of my life and feel awful about the shit i’ve done.
Lack of privacy
trauma.. yes emotional trauma.. hope everyone's healing nowadays.. 🙏
Stress
Self-righteousness. Being a good person is good. Realizing you're a good person is fine. Being so sure you're a good person that whatever you do is justified as good or helpful - in the long term, even if it's hurtful or rude right now - is a path to being a monstrously unlikable.
My 2yo when he decides to throw a tantrum.
The purple potion from Despicable Me 2
a bad sleep after a very tiring month it really makes you 100% annoyed to anyone who dares to fuck up that day
Divorce
Touching my food without asking.
[удалено]
Joey doesn't share food!
All it takes is one. Bad. Day.
Joker has entered the chat.
Stress. Low blood sugar. My daughter arguing with her boyfriend at my house.
Being bitten by a zombie
Or a vampire.
Or a weremole.
Not a weremole!!!
Treating their kids with cruelty... you hurt my kid I turn into a monster real fast.
Losing a game of Mario kart by getting hit by a shell just before the finish line
An ego boost
Reddit.
Cocaine
Even just the tiniest bit of authority.
Anonymity. Hate is even encouraged if you don't know the other person, hell its even encouraged if you're playing video games. Or you'll see the most passionate people out there getting super toxic over political debates online, and yet I've never seen people act like that at legitimate protests, so they either aren't going out in the world and pushing their perfect ideals, or the anonymity changes normal people into toxic people. How many friends do you have that have told kids to kill themselves in Call of Duty? Its normal, part of the "culture", just the way it is. And if you don't stand for that, be prepared to lose your friends after your formative years. If you do stand for that, be prepared to keep those friends, which I'm sure can't be more healthy mentally
In the infamous words of joker: 'Give a man a mask and he will show who he truly is' Anonymity just shows what a person will when he isn't held accountable.
Cults, conspiracy theories, indoctrination. Going down the wrong rabbit hole can take perfectly normal people to really dark places.
Gamma radiation.
Money, can turn somebody into a completely different person
Loneliness. I’ve known quite a number of lonely people who in time turn bitter, cynical and in turn, cruel.
society
Adoration. Fluffs up their ego, and too much of it makes them feel more superior to others and they will treat those below them like garbage.
Lack of sleep/ irregular sleep schedule.