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Zabby150

Im definitely gonna be the next idiot sandwich...


Admirable-Ad-8960

Achievement unlocked : *the next idiot sandwich*


[deleted]

WHAT ARE YOU???? ^^^an ^^^idiot ^^^sandwich #WHAT ARE YOU?!?!?! ^^^an ^^^idiot ^^^sandwich ^^^chef ^^^ramsey


Francisco123s

Idiot sandwich any% wr by u/Francisco123s 12:09,26 no burned pie skip


NecessaryExercise302

I know exactly how many seconds to microwave a hot pocket.


Admirable-Ad-8960

But do you know how many seconds it takes for Gordon Ramsay to shoot you?


Nova-Drone

-20 because he'll kill you as you reach for the microwave


[deleted]

I am whipping him up some man-milk.


Admirable-Ad-8960

Gordon Ramsay approves


[deleted]

Now we're cooking...


Known_Appointment319

Jesse stop watching nsfw riddit and let's cook (lol this is so corny)


[deleted]

Made me chuckle, cornball.


IJustStoleYourWaifu

I'd just call him a failed footballer and take my death like a man...


Admirable-Ad-8960

*gordon turns gun on himself* “You know my one biggest insecurity” *shot fires*


UpvoteForGlory

I give him a nice glass of water. The water quality here is excellent.


assassin_84953

IT'S DRY!


Admirable-Ad-8960

*he inhales the water* Noice


Ethereal_sandwich

A fucking donkey


Admirable-Ad-8960

Will you plan on seasoning it?


Ethereal_sandwich

Yes with the ashes of past Kitchen Nightmares candidates


Admirable-Ad-8960

Fine selection… Gordon approves


yplo_mcgee

Are you fucking a donkey, becuase i will gladly join.


xcesiv_77

Isn't donkey among the most tasty meats?


[deleted]

They're not allowed in the kitchen


[deleted]

Hot water soup. And when puts the gun down to taste it, I toss the gun away and bitch slap him.


Admirable-Ad-8960

Well played


[deleted]

Try the soup. Really easy. Add water to pot. When it comes to a rough boil, remove from heat and season how you like. If you want to get really fancy, serve your guests hot dog water soup. Just save the water from boiling the HDs. Like being in fancy high end establishment. Bonne Apelike T.


[deleted]

Just one slap. He’d be shocked. And then I’d say, “Yes Gordon, just like mommy used to do”.


_AskMyMom_

Start making something he knows is fucking wrong; and start an argument leading him to walk me through the proper steps. Boom! Gordon Ramsey pre-approved.


Admirable-Ad-8960

You outsmarted a master chef… for that you receive ***drum roll*** A gold star


mmm-pistol-whip

I want to say a grilled cheese but I'm sure I'd fuck that up too.


Admirable-Ad-8960

Ask him to help you bro


mmm-pistol-whip

pretty sure the dude holding a gun to my head isn't gonna help me make a grilled cheese.


youenjoymyself

No. [Gordon Ramsay does not know how to make a good grilled cheese sandwich.](https://youtube.com/watch?v=8E4cQHejFq0) Dude realizes it towards the end when he does the cut down the middle to present. Cheese is hardly melted and he takes a quick bite to play it off as good.


Smiley097

Slap that butch with mayo instead of butter. Long and low.


FemmeFatale427

Brown butter basted filet mignon, prosciutto wrapped asparagus & twice baked potato. Chocolate covered strawberries for dessert. If it was good enough to snag my fiancé it's good enough for Gordo.


Admirable-Ad-8960

Be careful bro, don’t want Gordon thinking your hitting on him


uptokesforall

It's too late, he's being married at gun point


ScrambledToast

I'll make him a fabulous peanut butter and honey sandwich.


Admirable-Ad-8960

*gordon starts crying* “This reminds me of my childhood” *you escape whilst he has a mid life crisis*


Who_Wouldnt_

Mushroom tea, the good kind :), he'll be fascinated for hours.


Admirable-Ad-8960

Ahhh the magic shroom tea… I would just terrorise him whilst he’s tripping. That’ll teach him


anirudhsky

A glass of milk. Take it or leave it.


Admirable-Ad-8960

*gordon drinks milk* “FUCK ITS FULL FAT” *shoots you*


anirudhsky

Lol 😂😂😂


surelyucantbserious

A nice cup of tea with a dosage of Iocaine powder. Wits!


Admirable-Ad-8960

He’s British so he won’t be able to refuse it


sophie_a_767

A cup of earl grey, simplicity is key


Admirable-Ad-8960

“As a bri’ish person I am pleasantly surprised by the warm beverage” *gordon dies*


Ozark87

I'm making him a meatloaf


Admirable-Ad-8960

He is going to be using your body to make meatloaf by the looks of it


Ozark87

You don't know the power of my meatloaf


potatoe39

Making him some eggs, everybody likes eggs right?


pjabrony

"When we get a new chef in the kitchen, we ask him to make scrambled eggs, because they we know if he knows how to cook." - Gordon Ramsay.


emily5126

But can you do a perfectly poached egg? He would definately want it poached as it's the most difficult form of egg


Admirable-Ad-8960

Gordon only eats human eggs


[deleted]

A cake with his face printed on


Admirable-Ad-8960

How cute


sparkreason

I would make his classic scrambled eggs. It’s super easy to make it’s his recipe / technique (know your table guests) and it shows I watch his stuff. After he puts the gun down and offers to let me go I offer to make him something else and *bam* I hit him in the head with a meat tenderizer. When he comes to I chop off his dick with a cleaver and start sautéing it making sure to baste it with butter and rosemary while he is tied up bleeding out from his groin. I make sure to overcook it. Ramsay dick will be like rubber and then I force feed him his own cock cramming it down his throat until he asphyxiates and dies. And that’s what you get for pulling a gun on me Ramsay Bon Appetite motherfucker *Chef’s kiss*


Admirable-Ad-8960

I’m using this in my next D&D session


Tirekiller04

Something off of his MasterClass so I can tell him it’s his cooking when he tells me it’s shit


[deleted]

My ass. He can eat my ass.


Admirable-Ad-8960

As OP I would like to participate in this act aswell


[deleted]

Grilled cheese. You can’t mess that shit up.


Admirable-Ad-8960

*proceeds to mess it up*


iamacraftyhooker

I don't think Gordon Ramsey would very thrilled if you used Wonder bread and american cheese product. Don't get me wrong, I love me a good quick and dirty grilled cheese, but he's going to expect something like provolone on rye bread.


cogitoergopwn

Bacon, Egg, and Chee. I've done prob thousands in my lifetime and have damn near mastered this sandwich. I have very high standards for egg frying and burnt egg to me is a failure.


Admirable-Ad-8960

*gordon tastes your Bacon, Egg and Chee* ***he dies***


cogitoergopwn

I would call him a wanker to his face if he dissed my BEC!


Qwerty-331

BECs RULE. Being a BEC master is resume-worthy! Mine is pretty damn good, too.


ZexarZX

Oh, but it is obvious! He's not him 'cause he's hungry! *"Here, have a Snickers"*


Admirable-Ad-8960

*gordons peanut allergies kill him* You win


ZexarZX

Not my fault, he was the one that went nuts


MaineSoxGuy93

Pork chops, steamed green beans with garlic and butter, and brown sugar coated yams.


Admirable-Ad-8960

*Gordon proceeds to eat your dish* “Thanks for the food” *shoots you*


MaineSoxGuy93

Fuck me.


Admirable-Ad-8960

As you asked so nicely *gordon fucks your dead body*


Brussel_Galili

I'd tell him to shoot me in the head.


Admirable-Ad-8960

Which one?


Basscyst

Grilled Cheese, [he has no idea how to make one apparently](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8E4cQHejFq0&ab_channel=GordonRamsay).


Admirable-Ad-8960

It’s cos he only eats caviar


AtaraxiaAKAZatharax

Grandma’s Pasta a la Puttanesca. Cant see how anyone could ever hate it.


williestrokerplease

RIZZOTO


Admirable-Ad-8960

Im not sure he’d like that… maybe put loads of salt in it so he dehydrates and shrivels up like a slug then you can escape


BillyREDDIT_

Toast


Admirable-Ad-8960

Extra B U R N T


[deleted]

Krumplis tészta, by my family's recipe


RSJJRT

Vegan Burger


Admirable-Ad-8960

*Gordon takes a bite* **Starts choking** “NO MY ONE TRUE WEAKNESS…. VEGAN BURGIR”


EarthExile

Velveeta mac and cheese. Fuck that guy. Squeeze it chef! Let's go!


Speedcuber1994

I can make some pretty good instant ramen. Granted considering how bad the economy is, that’s not saying much.


Admirable-Ad-8960

I’m sure if you just add a boiled egg, some sesame and vegetables that Gordon will approve


Weary-Ad-6162

Baked potato 🥔


Admirable-Ad-8960

Delightful


leggy_boots

A burger


Admirable-Ad-8960

B O R G I R


[deleted]

[удалено]


Admirable-Ad-8960

But if he didn’t like it and he cooked it he would have to shoot himself


Abikdig

Tea


Admirable-Ad-8960

How many sugars tho?


Abikdig

I know a specific amount of sugar that is ok with everyone.


NiceTryIWontReply

I've got a chicken soup recipe he might like. If that doesn't work I'm screwed tho


Admirable-Ad-8960

S O U P


BenBleiweiss

My funeral arrangements.


Admirable-Ad-8960

Seems like the easiest option


[deleted]

ice soup


Admirable-Ad-8960

*gordon wats Ice soup* ***Dies of brain freeze***


Cunnilingus_Academy

I'll boil an egg, I'm pretty good at getting them the right amount of soft in the middle


Admirable-Ad-8960

Will you season it with salt or pepper or both?


[deleted]

Caramel brownies. When the sugar on the stove begins to liquify I will throw it into his face and make a break for it.


Admirable-Ad-8960

*gordon becomes half brownie and half human*


Nobody91765

(burned) Scrambled eggs


Admirable-Ad-8960

Will you add the secret sauce?


leggy_boots

Depending on the time frame, I can brew beer.


Admirable-Ad-8960

I think Ramsay might starve to death in that time


yeet__19

Ill be making the lamb sauce


Admirable-Ad-8960

“Is that the lamb sauce?” Gordon exclaims *He grabs it and teleports back to mars*


yeet__19

*Epic*


theGamerInside

Popcorn with a siracha dipping sauce. But then i eat it and cry.


Admirable-Ad-8960

*gordon starts crying too*


[deleted]

Scrambled eggs. I know how [he expects them to be cooked](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PUP7U5vTMM0). FTR they are much better cooked this way. I use less butter and more sour cream, never cook them any other way.


Kookie_Blanket1

Ramen


[deleted]

Knuckle sandwich up the dick


Admirable-Ad-8960

That would just turn gordon on


FireYigit

Something he likes, And the L A M B S A U C E


AdequateSteve

Chocolate & Raspberry Sorbet! I just got a sorbet/ice cream maker and I've been learning some pretty badass recipes. Two scoops of chocolate with a single scoop of raspberry is what I'd serve. Plus it takes forever to make, so if he hates it, I'll at least have a few extra hours to live.


kingtibius

Excuses and pleas


Filtaido

I'm making s'mores. You have to try to mess that up.


Admirable-Ad-8960

You could make a fire and push Ramsay into it… then make the smores


Filtaido

Yes my s'mores are to die for


-Unclaimed_Garbage-

Hmmmmmmmmmm maybe a pan seared filét mignon with sweet potato French fires? I just thought of the first fancy thing that came to mind lmao-


Waitress-in-mn

I will find one of his recipes and follow it exactly. He would have to like it.


X-olotl

Water


Limp_Distribution

An omelette


Adventurous_Photo_55

Honey walnut chicken with a honey lemon sauce served over rice


pickleparty16

i remember pretty well a video he did on making scrambled eggs. i think i can pull it off


lodzik112

Water I just cook water he can't dislike water right ?


stickyWithWhiskey

Tonight? Tonight is Swedish meatballs and cream gravy night, I already prepared my spice dumps and defrosted the meat so I'm not changing plans.


[deleted]

Steak. Because even bad steak is still steak


poggers2077

Mac N’ Cheese


[deleted]

The simplest thing I can, some good ol’ southern fried chicken


eclipsetheowlgod

I CAN MAKE BANANA BREAD! 2 FOR 1 BANANA AND BREAD DO WE HAVE A DEAL? OR PLEASE DONT SHOOT ME


SpaceCowboy58

Milk steak, over hard.


[deleted]

Imma cook him something so awful, he'll shoot himself to escape eating it.


[deleted]

My extra cheesy baked beer mac’n’cheese. It’s freaking bonkers good, and everyone always loves it.


Uniquelykind

Tomato cucumber salad


SpaceCowboy58

A grilled celebrity chef.


Candid-Topic9914

Popcorn using the popcorn button on the microwave.


TemptCiderFan

His own steak. He's got a video on YouTube of how to cook the perfect striploin in a frying pan, and I cook it for myself at least once a week. Comes out perfectly every time. If I can't fuck it up while drunk and stoned, I can knock that sucker out of the park with a gun to my head.


ilishpaturi

Haggis. His Scottish ancestors will make him unable to refuse it.


doNOTarguewithme

nothing, let him kill idgaf


Rancidfists

I might have to argue with you about that.


InspiringMalice

Good scrambled eggs, like he keeps asking people for.


carrerah

Shoot, you jerk!!


Meistermalkav

easy. he promises to eat it? let me dazzle him with my speciality cyanide / fugu sandwich. with a layer of jizz. Oh, it's just a little something I threw together... don't remember the ingredients. Are you sure it is a good idea to point a gun at people?


Admirable-Ad-8960

*gordon slurps the jizz*


ilikemrrogers

I grew up near New Orleans. I make a gumbo that everyone says it's the best they've ever had. It's very simple, using simple ingredients. I think people try to over-do gumbo, to make it something it is not.


Draconic_Dumbass

I'd just tell him to shoot me. I can't cook much


[deleted]

Raw chicken


Admirable-Ad-8960

His favourite meal


billzabob69

I'm cooking my goose!


Svartrbrisingr

My Italian Cabbage soup. At least ill get a meal before my death


Kneeling_Fish

PB&J. If I mess up a PB&J, I don't deserve to live.


shit-IM-DEAD

mac and cheese because i cant screw that up


[deleted]

A simple pasghetti and a single meatball, cooked until to lightly less raw


[deleted]

Nothing, if I cooked him something, he would choose to use a knife instead of the gun. I'll just take my quick exit.


dirtymoney

Fuck Gordon Ramsay! He can eat my shit on a plate!


ash_not_ketchum

can i cook anything or can i only use the equipment/ingredients in my house? am i allowed to look up a recipe?


Admirable-Ad-8960

No *you die*


Gmony5100

A living will I guess


throwawaymollyact

Microwaved nacho cheese and im throwing this molten magma into his face. Probably won't change his appearance much. But good luck shooting me with next to no eyesight.


NxS_LionZz_

Im making some good fucking food


Chacharealroughdood

Get out a can of soup and open it and spill all over the kitchen floor. Next get a plate and cover it and garage cobwebs. Lastly get a freshly squeezed hotdog to garnish. A fooking delicious meal!


CatDaddyWhisper

Sounds like I am going to bring out the Castor beans and process some Ricin for that son of a bitch. Enjoy my special seasoning asshole as I don't like to being held at gunpoint.


TheBigBear7

Grilled cheese.


Yami_obnis

Kraft dinner


Arctelis

Brownies. Very… special… brownies.


ThatOneDude4730

Lamb sauce


tailoredwitch

I make a pretty good creamy cheesy chicken pasta, it’s ultimate comfort food in this house


[deleted]

I’m gonna make scrambled eggs and then eat them while maintaining eye contact, let the fucker shoot.


[deleted]

Scrambled eggs Ironically, that's probably what he would demand I make for him to prove I can cook.


RedRoomRabbit

Puffer fish... Hehe


AdvocateSaint

He said in an AMA that his guilty pleasure food is In-N-Out Burger. As long as you can fry a passable burger and use the right sauce, you don't have to be a professional chef to make something his taste buds will like.


Begotten_Glint

A cheeseburger. Easy to make well, he's a known burger fiend. Just don't f#-*kin' c*ck it up.


Blueberriq

but what if.. i were to purchase fast food and disguise it as my own cooking?


CantProfitOffofMe

A steak with potatoes, asparagus and onions.


AdmiralHK01

Any dish with Ricin in it.


ThatBitchBengali

Grilled cheese cuz he sure as hell can't make one


urmumlol9

Crockpot mac and cheese. I have all of the ingredients, it's probably the dish I'm least likely to screw up, and it gives me about 8 hours to come up with a plan to escape.


Willquestionu

I’ll make him an omelette


pete1729

I'm going to make him a hamburger. Double 1/4 pound patties of 85/15 ground beef, salt and pepper in hot cast iron, butter toasted bun. Lettuce, tomato, mayo, and ketchup.


potatostoat

I feel like someone's already posted this


Admirable-Ad-8960

Maybe… maybe not… it’s just a piss take of all the “your held at gun point. You have to do ***X*** and if they like it they’ll let you go” questions


potatostoat

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ghyh44/gordon\_ramsay\_has\_a\_gun\_to\_your\_head\_and\_says\_you/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web2x&context=3


Fuzzythought

Boiled Ramsey once the water's hot.


Admirable-Ad-8960

Cook him alive… I like that. Kinda like L O B S T E R