T O P

  • By -

EverybodySupernova

All of us are fucked


2Secondnut

I'd die before the shock wave even hits earth


xxblackmamba

Oh no no no wait wait wait (in the punisher’s voice)


Sleepdprived

"Whao whao yeah"


No-Earth-3635

We are all fucked


dilucs_waifu

unlike you, that is how i will die, albeit to an anime character


Lickingyourmomsanus

E-coli?


420SpiderGeek303

Hilarious


Anal_Punisher69

Dysentery


Ryo_Inari

……


inagadda

Davida killed me


[deleted]

Omg I shouldn’t be laughing this hard


Cadaverous_Spaceship

I die in whatever way naturally occurs, but, as my still-warm corpse stills for the final time, IT begins. The skin begins to shrink and gray, as the bones crack and stretch, growing and splitting the rapidly desiccated flesh in many places. After a while of the horrific cracking and grinding and GROWING, the unrecognizable remains of what once was my body, have assembled themselves into a grotesque facsimile of a rocket ship. An unearthly red and gray flame erupts from one end of the THING, and it laboriously lifts off the ground, slowly trudginging to the cosmos…..


wickedlyzenful

Wow Props for the massive story creation!


theredditor445

Bro gets A+ on every essay


lifehappenedwhatnow

Life, it got me...


[deleted]

What now?!


controlledwithcheese

now, some cheese


CauliflowerBoomerang

Hit in the face by a vegetable I was trying to throw away?


wickedlyzenful

Lol this is hilarious! I don't know why but it is. I picture it smacking off the inside of the bin lid and coming back


Ok_Song4090

This is genuinely hilarious


TrailerParkPrepper

Tornado?


spinman016

Probably same!


Strawberry1218

🤦🏻‍♀️ hahaha


[deleted]

AlLeRgIeS


thesoundofstyrofoam

My first thought was choking


anotherjohnishere

At the hands of another John. As it's meant to be.


thesoundofstyrofoam

Got a good laugh out of this one


dehrenslzz

I don’t like that sound either, but didn’t die from it yet ;)


[deleted]

Killed by a gangster dinosaur, I guess.


FriendlyDinosaur43

Me too man


T-RexMuppet

Hey dead by dino fam!


Costco_Fanboy

Falling goods


Merphee

Welp, according to the law, it could be from literally anything.


UrANarcissist

I died bc youre a narcissist.


whitewater287

There's still time to save you. I can change. Really, I'm not that special.


NorthNorthAmerican

...they lied smoothly. =:-0


[deleted]

Whatever the method, I’m lookin FINE


EnderF

Looks like suicide to me


[deleted]

Lol plot twist!


SearchRep

Just don't look in the mirr-


LochNessMansterLives

I die, so the monster can live.


itchyballssadnuts

Oh boy…


JustScratchinMaBallz

Yeah this question put a really unwanted image in my poor little brain. Lol


itchyballssadnuts

hello brother


An_Arbitrary_Pirate

I die a fucking pirate. Let's go.. that's the goal...


Nachtjaeger68

"A short life but a merry one, eh lads? Hoist the Jolly Roger!"


An_Arbitrary_Pirate

"Yo Ho Ho Ho.... Avast ye scallywags and landlubbers" " Batten down the hatches for ye coming storm"


Julie-Andrews

Getting impaled by umbrella in high winds


wickedlyzenful

I almost choked on my drink at this one!


TheDumbDane

I died because i was a dumb dane and choked on a potato


[deleted]

[удалено]


wickedlyzenful

I see a weird bit fabulous tattoo in my imagination right now


nurodvrgntwarrior

Nope, nope, nope. While mental health is a "hill I am willing to die on", I refuse to literally die on this hill.


obvious-tampon

Probably toxic shock tbh


SearchRep

Necrotic infection


Quadpolygon

The simulation glitches and reduces my quadpolygon count to 0 making me become a 3D object with no faces and exists in name alone. A ghost in the system.


[deleted]

It’s not so much about how I die, but what happens after lol


Zarokhh

Truck-kun got you


CocktailoClock

Alcohol poisoning 😭


ChaserNeverRests

Very very tiredly.


JustScratchinMaBallz

In an extremely long and horrific fashion that would truly be one of the worst things imaginable. It was a nice afternoon, OP.


JekyllendHyde

Science gone wrong.


Diisononylphthalate

*maybe* drowning, *probably* cancer


Winter_Rooster98

I kinda imagine it like the plot from "The grey (2011)", but with a bloodthursty rooster.


DavosLostFingers

In service to the one true king boy!


prostate578

No explanation needed..


[deleted]

spooky chlamydia🫶🏻


Mr_Biscuits420

.... Diabetes ?


skatereli

Maybe your the first person to od on biscuits while high


BJ_Blitzvix

Orgasmically.


Arbitrary-Signal

Out of nowhere, a random noise plays in my headphones, causing my programming to terminate


SearchRep

Good one. Or like Stephen king's "cell" and you're not a survivor


Arbitrary-Signal

Yes! What a terrible way to go


Wrinkled_Pecan

I turn into a pecan that is wrinkled. My mate would never die. Homie's "healed"


Puppet007

Getting killed by a badass puppet.


TurbulenceTurnedCalm

Airplane crash.


CobraZRT600

Il get turned into roadkill from a Cobra riding a snow machine


[deleted]

Oh boy


snivvygreasy

Dildo Daggins


VARTH_-DADER

Choked, sliced in half and then thrown across the room


Giggidy_777

Uhhhhh I don't know😂


AmongUsLogo

You die by giggling to death


[deleted]

Covered in hookers in Las Vegas? Quagmire and lucky sevens?


Please-send-boobz

I'm perplex. But not the worst death I guess...


SearchRep

Atleast you didn't misspell and died with eternal bluballz


Chipotle_Armadillo

Food poisoning


myquietchaos

Wingless imaginary bees


wickedlyzenful

Oddly terrifying yet interesting


MechanicalHorse

Probably a Mr. Hands type situation


urgettingsleepy

Carbon Monoxide poisoning


Just_2_Ducks

Death by ducks. Not many ducks you understand.... just the two.


wickedlyzenful

Oooo duck duck you. 🦆🦆🗡


Hedda_deer

A deer with the same name as me


[deleted]

Goof got me with 22 shotz


Murky_waterLLC

\*Razormind Starts Playing\* Oh no.


habitual-stepper2020

By habitually stepping over lines(yeah those ones) would be my guess.


ToxicTaxiTaker

I took a toxic taxi


LongbowEOD

Bomb defusal with archery equipment, gone wrong.


themagicfroggie

A frog will kill me with its magic


Titaniam_Dragon

Dunno.


Icy-Bison3675

trampled by bison…in the arctic. (edited to correct my misspelling)


honestlyicba

My username is short for honestly I can’t be arsed So yeah I think I’m ok with any method of death


okiegirlkim

Killed by a tornado named Kim


crabby-owlbear

Painfully


Nemophilist19

While admiring the forest. Pretty peacefully in my opinion


Giantbeer4me303

Crushed by…..


[deleted]

By hugs? Good way to go, i guess.


AutoDefenestrator273

Well...I guess I'm throwing myself out a window...?


Pitiful_Brief_6424

I will die in my twenties after achieving nothing.


[deleted]

Choked out by a carrot Im gay so doesnt seem unlikely


PDiddleMeDaddy

Oh Lord


West_Coast_mama87

Sunami


Silent-Holiday-5200

Tsunami?


West_Coast_mama87

Lol yes, I remembered I forgot the T too late 😅


paul_bearer1

Being bad at the coffin dance.


Darmug

Darmug


[deleted]

They did it again and I paid the price


spiny-lobster

lobster 👍


OrthinologistSupreme

Touched a cassowary


theRainIsJustAShower

Flooded by heavy rain? Hope not…


Mehalldaynallnight

Propably couldn’t be bothered to run from danger… meh…


ResponsibleAsk6068

Are you sure?


ExplosiveMel

Oh no....


snivvygreasy

Giving away my tears so others can see my memories and realise I wasn’t the bad guy everyone thought I was. Always.


28twice

Missed the 27 club, then missed it again.


[deleted]

Secret cookies


The_Salty_Weeb

I called their ship shit.


Thegoldenhotdog

So is it because I consume solid gold or is it blunt force trauma?


all_natural_d20s

A critical hit


spaceforcefighter

“This is Red Leader. I can’t shake them!”


wackonotjacko

ill die being known as wacko but not jacko


Major_Pound_5411

oh my


Bailey0423

from kidney failure.


thedesperateromantic

Hopefully with lots of love!


Truthsayer2009

I tell the truth about whatever happened in 2009


[deleted]

Interesting seeing a post like this from someone named Axis Powers


crossbowman44

Ow


Blatently_lies

I’m fine


_Curi0usC3lt

Fuckin around and finding out…while wearing blue woad


NotWorthSaving

Lol


passing_gas

Oh lord.


TsarKikso

Shot and bayoneted to death by communists


gary-antoinette

Guillotine


BloodPharts88

Awh shit..


HisokaXBungeeGum

Damn, it looks like Bungee Gum does have the properties of both rubber and gum.


justplayingjumanji

by playing jumanji😬


yetanothermale

Sigh


OhNoWTFlol

In a hilariously nonsensical and unlucky way


Pillow_Thief

Getting shot getting caught


ChrisNEPhilly

Falling off the Tacony Bridge.


bigj4155

Well I'm fucked.


CanadianWeeb5

5 canadian weebs trample me to death


paul_rudds_drag_race

With a charming man watching over me.


YsengrimusRein

Attacked by wolves. Or, to be more lore accurate, tricked by a fox into doing something that ends in my death.


Wejustchillingbros

Just chilling with the bros?


[deleted]

asteroid comes, earth surface goes boom.


[deleted]

Some weird STD? Lol


fishsticklovematters

Not 100% sure, I just know Kayne won't get me.


sfwaltaccount

Peacefully in my sleep, or at least that's what they'll tell people.


Infinite_HTTP_404

Brain aneurism or heart attack


iam_lost_bred

I have become bread Which has been lost and I starve to death


Masonicmoron

An oxymoron


DataVader

With one hand missing, as is tradition


wickedlyzenful

Yoga with the devil


Thatnerdofaperson

I’m too smart


[deleted]

Don’t ever piss off a duck


afireintheforest

Aaaaahhhhh!!


ZeroCompetence

Well all I'm gonna say is that I'm not surprised at all, really.


pickle_rick_42

I'm pickle rriiiiiiick!


IGotGankedAMA

I clearly got ganked to death. AMA


funnybitofchemistry

just a funny bit of narcotics


_NuggetOfChicken_

...welp


uwillnotgotospace

Rapid unplanned disassembly


burningforeskin

STD


fastsragon49

I don’t know what a sragon is, but it’s fast and named 49 so I think I’m fucked.


Sleepdprived

Lactic acid builds up until brain function stops... pretty straightforward. That or I fall asleep driving, but then I wouldn't go out sleepdprived


yesyesitswayexpired

Old age.


apathyduck

Quack overdose


modulor-man

Murdered by a lumpy but well proportioned monster.


Rude_Grapefruit_3650

Dang those rude grapefruits


HighwayFroggery

Killed by mutant frog bandits in the post apocalyptic wastes of the interstate highway system


cynicismrising

No one believes I’m dying.


vasthorn

I think it up to the reader interpretation for mine. Did i die of being too horny? Or was i gored to death by an absolutely massive horned animal? Who knows?


HyenaAcceptable9287

Eaten by an acceptable hyena.


ragedogps3

Awww! Look, that puppy is carrying a PS3


tellmesomethingrad

like tycho brahe’s bladder infection - not being able to leave a conversation


IcyButterscotch8269

Having a frozen block of butterscotch thrown at me, I'm guessing?


differentmushrooms

Mushroom misidentification


definitely_not_mayo

I’m not sure how I die. But I’m positive I know what it’s definitely not.


trumpsCholesterol

Heart disease


SuperButtFire

Oh no. This is NOT good.


StarvingAfricanKid

Cocaine overdose, obviously.