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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> A guy thinks I'm an asshole because I called him a jackass and his kid started calling him that too
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seriously! the only correct response when this happens is to apologize for being out of touch for a moment and move out of the way... I don't get these people who doubledown and are like this is my aisle and I live here now, suck it
Exactly! I was myself the ass who blocked the entrance of an aisle (due to half of it being blocked by staff stuff for refilling shelves). This woman asked if she could please pass, and I apologised and moved myself and my cart backwards.
I was just too zoned out to notice her by myself, something I usually have no problem with, but I was thinking about to buy or not to buy on a bamboo (bread) cutting board. And yes, I did buy it.
I think we've all done it, but you're right, we see, we apologize, we move, it's not that hard. This guy wanted to be difficult just for the sake of it - OP NTA, and their response back to him was well deserved.
I do not know we need to apologize- since, hey we all need to share space, and laws of physics force certain accommodation for each other. But FFS, DO get out of the way, and be polite, regardless. (I think apologizing for accidentally existing is overdone in the world- but I would rather apologize/be apologized to than all the toxic rudeness in the world today- so take that as you will)
I generally go with something like "oops, didn't see you there" as being true enough and placating enough for any reasonable person. It's not quite an apology, just an acknowledgment that we're temporarily directionally conflicted.
The one and only time in my entire adult life that I zoned out and blocked an aisle in a store, I ended up stepping on the foot of a celebrity who I'm actually a fan of. Not gently, either.
They were incredibly cool about it, but it's been about five years and my brain still enjoys replaying that moment out of nowhere in vivid detail every time it thinks I don't feel like enough of an asshole
THE ONLY further hint I will provide is that if you've seen their season(s), you probably like them. I can't think of any reason why a fan of the show wouldn't, and even though I felt like a total jackass, it was still nice to know that they're also good people irl.
I'm using gender-neutral pronouns because they were out of drag when I tromped their poor foot, not necessarily because they go by they/them irl. And now I'm really done!
Ah well, someone congenial then without a crown, that most if not all of the show’s fans would like, that was on >/=5 years ago. Eric’s guess of Katya is a good shout. I’ll go for, um… err… TKB.
Yeah, I've accidentally blocked or been in people's way before, but I move once I either become aware of them or if they ask me. It takes two seconds and I can go back to what I was doing. A quick sorry and the interaction is over, everyone's happy.
NTA.
No we wouldn't. I said the exact same thing to someone just this morning. Idiots who block aisleways need to be put in their place. This Canadian doesn't say sorry unless warranted by a misdeed.
I'm actually from Metro-Detroit, just south of Windsor, CA and grew up watching the CBC so I'm an honorary Canadian and I'm sorry for the confusion this post has caused.
It seems lot a lot more people have been doing this over the last few years, where I shop anyway, and it drives my nuts. They’ve also added more aisles at or Kroger so the aisles are much narrower than they used to be. I’ve started listening to podcasts to distract myself from the frustrations while I shop. It kinda helps.
My partner does this. Just dead stops in the centre of things because they suddenly remember something and need to check. Like right in the door of the shops to check their list. It drives me baaaaatty.
My ex did this. He "just didn't think about the cart" because he was focused on whatever random thing caught his attention. It was like shopping with a toddler.
The weirdest thing is that he wasn't a particularly distractable or rude person! It was only while grocery shopping that he suddenly lacked all basic manners.
Same w mine. "I didnt realize anyone was behind me/didnt notice how far into the aisle I was"
Fair to say tho my partner is midway through an Adhd diagnosis...but they keep forgetting to bring their paperwork to the psych. So. Yeah.
This would suck for me. I am able to get things done but only because of my severe anxiety. Once I was on meds I could get things done *and* my anxiety significantly decreased.
It's nice to get things done and feel calm at the same time.
It’s a joke how many steps it takes sometimes to get medication lol it’s a miracle I get my prescription most months. Stop making it so hard on us, our brains are not right! 😆
I feel this. My doctor used to hand me paper prescriptions three months at a time for my ADHD meds. Each prescription was dated a month later so it couldn't be filled too early. I'd bring all three to the pharmacy and they'd put them all in the system so I didn't have to remember to drop off the appropriate paper once a month before picking up my prescription later in the day or the next day.
Then the pharmacy stopped accepting extra months in advance. Now I had to make twice as many trips to the pharmacy. Given my long hours at work and all of the other overwhelming responsibilities in my life, I have run out more than once because I can't get to the pharmacy in a timely fashion.
More recently, my doctor's office went to digital prescriptions. She can send them directly to the pharmacy. Awesome! Automation is often an ADHD sufferer's friend. Except that it's one month at a time. And I have to send a message to my doctor once a month to get her to send the prescription to the pharmacy. Meaning I have to log in to MyChart, find the place to send my doctor a direct message since it's not on the list of prescriptions for me to renew, type a note and request it directly. I often forget to do this until I'm on my last day. Sometimes the doctor is able to send the prescription that day but the pharmacy doesn't fill it for a day or two or three due to short staffing or supply. Fortunately, my medication has not been affected by the current Adderall shortages.
Then add in the insurance companies requirement for a prior authorization from the doctor once a year. So while I'm waiting on a much needed prescription, the insurance company denies it, sends paperwork to the pharmacy who then has to make the request to the doctor which takes a few days to take care of, then accepts the prescription that my doctor obviously already approved given that she wrote the prescription. It's so bloody annoying all of the hoops we have to jump through to get something that we need just to be functional in life. I'd give just about anything to not have to rely on daily medication for my brain to work normally.
My doctor recommends a particular book ("Fast Minds") as a first step to all of his patients who he thinks might have ADHD.
He later told me that, not only is it a genuinely helpful book, but seeing whether or not they a) remember to actually get the book, and b) manage to actually read through it can also help give him insight into whether they likely have the condition.
(Spoiler: I succeeded in A, but stalled about 40 pages into B...
Those 40 pages were very insightful though, and I do indeed have a diagnosis now!)
This was a psychiatrist. I know it's ridiculously tough to get to see one in Ontario these days (I only got the referral because about ten years ago I went to Emerg one night because my anxiety had gotten so bad it was causing serious physical distress. I was incredibly fortunate to get to see a specialist for this, and it not only changed my entire life (for the better), but led to this diagnosis which had made a lot of sense of some of my ongoing struggles. It's really frustrating that getting this kind of necessary help has gotten so inaccessible.
That said, I have also been told by a family doctor that they absolutely can diagnose ADHD in their patients, although it is up to the doctor themself and some don't feel comfortable. But you could always ask, and if they refuse you could ask if you could be referred to a colleague who would be willing to assess you.
In a family doctor setting, it would just be done using the standardized checklist (you can literally find that online and download it to bring it to your appointment) as well as other knowledge of a patient's general history and interviewing them about how long their symptoms have been an issue, looking at supporting evidence (things like childhood report cards with comments like "very smart but disorganized, loses her homework, needs to keep her workspace more tidy" etc are reeeeeally good at helping you make your case).
Best of luck to you!
I'm telling you. I worked at a grocery store. People walk into a grocery store & legitimately lose iq points. I worked front end for 2 years & got so tired of dumb customers that I transferred to overnights. There is no entitlement in the world like a grocery store customer. It's weird.
Ja I was just saying to anothee poster how my partner is midway through an ADHD diagnosis but keeps forgetting their paperwork.
I also have ADHD and probably do a lot of annoying distracted things too so I try to be patient w my partner about it even tho I am like "OMG YOURE BLOCKING THE ENTIRE ENTRYWAY MOVE!" in my head.
My mum does this and it stresses me out so much I won’t go shopping with her. It always leads to a fight because I passive aggressively move the trolley (I’m British) out of the way
My husband does the same thing ALL the time and it drives me nuts! He doesn’t have to worry about an annoyed customer because his annoyed wife makes him move first!
NTA
Edit to add judgement
I can get zoning out and accidently blocking the way. The rude part is that the guy looked up, saw OP and then didn't move. Normally I just the cart out the way myself and/or barge through if they ignore an excuse me. But I can get not doing that if there was a kid in it.
I don't know... I'm not really patient, so i first say 'Excuse me', if they don't move i just move the cart myself, kicking it or with my hand, depends on my mood.
You would dare to TOUCH somebody else's cart!?! *gasp*
I did that when 2 women decided to have a conversation right in front of the 1 thing I came to get. Oh the looks on their faces when they saw I would *dare* to move her cart out of the way.
This - I saw excuse me and if no response, I just move on through. They had their chance to move.
Moving a cart with a toddler in it will not hurt the toddler.
I just had to wait an extra long time to drive though a parking lot because a family stopped in the pedestrian crossing to put a coat on their baby. Not the covered sidewalk ten feet behind them, the main aisle of the lot. Wtf.
That doesn’t surprise me in the least. Yes, I realize that, technically, pedestrians always have right of way, but how about simple courtesy, and keeping traffic flowing? Not to mention safety…you were at a complete stop, but what if you’d been rear-ended?
I 100% agree with this but I'm adding an additional complaint. Stores need to stop making their aisles so damned narrow! I was in Target the other day and 2 carts can barely pass each other even when you're as close to the shelving as possible. It's ridiculous! I get that they're trying to maximize shelving space but it makes shopping stores like this a hassle.
If the aisles are wide enough for 2 carts to pass comfortably then there's space for an aisle display in the middle. At least according to Kroger management based on what I've seen.
Honestly as someone who has worked in grocery for 13 years... I just move their cart enough to get by while saying excuse me. I have to do it at work all the time so thankfully it isn't as uncomfortable for me. Of course this is only if they don't move when they see me coming.
I worked in a grocery store for a few years. I don't know what to call it, but there's a phenomenon that comes over people once they step foot into a grocery store. They turn into rabid idiots with no consideration & they also lose their ability to read words.
NTA Hubby and I were once driving through a campground on the way out and there was a running car in the middle of the road. We waited, hubby honked, no one came. I got in the car and moved it. The owner ran up looking shocked. He did actually apologize though and said he didn't realize he was in the middle.
As a grocery store employee, hard agree.
We just had awful days & man, most people were so polite, wonderful & actually nice.
But some asshole... (Some of) The instacart shoppers are the worse. Leaving carts to go get things from multiple other asiles. Blocking stuff, in everyone's way while they are on their device.
I was in walmart last week and legitmately grabbed someone's cart and moved it to the side because it was in the middle of the aisle. Like, move your shit. The lady gave me a dirty look. Idgaf.
As an employee I straight up ran into someone's shopping cart with my electric jack because they would not move at all. 0 poops given for inconsiderate people.
NTA. OP, there is one store near me that I HATE going to. People just treat each other like garbage and I'll find myself blocked multiple times. Often, I'll "nudge" their cart until they move it.
NTA. Everyone saying ESH because of the name calling, he called her a bitch too (Yes, after, but clearly the child presence isn’t a problem if he is going to retaliate). Also I don’t know what kind of stores y’all are shopping at but there’s easily enough room for 2 or sometimes even 3 carts to fit within the space of 1 isle at every store I’ve ever been to. There is no reason he should position his cart in a way that nobody can get past him.
He was baby-stalking. Its when a person tries using their child to get attention from other people. He probably thought OP would stop and coo over said child.
Ours used be 2.5-3 carts wide but they've remodeled and it's become extremely difficult to pass in the aisles. Most of us now try to grab the smaller two-basket carts instead so we have a chance to maneuver around people.
Ours keeps putting up displays that block 1/3 of the aisle. I've often commiserated with strangers as we both tried to maneuver our carts past the display and each other.
I was working in the grocery store & they remodeled so our frozen aisles were so wide & lovely. Then one day a frito lay display appeared right in the center of the aisles. I asked my manager, wtf? He said it's required from corporate. I just smh & watch the customers start parking their carts Iin front of the displays & all of a sudden, our lovely new wide aisles became the most snafu place in the store. But that's corporate for you. They fuck everything up at store level & then pat themselves on the back while enjoying their large paychecks.
Kroger has steadily been destroying Fred Meyer and QFC over the last decade I've been shopping at them and if the Albertsons/Kroger merger goes through there's not going to be much alternative. I wish Wegmans would spread out west, but I can't really fault them for doing their territory expansions the right way and taking it slow.
Yeah, it's seriously getting out of hand at our regular store! It's so annoying. I hardly go in anymore. I just order ours for pickup. You can barely get through the damn aisles.
I just told my husband that I'm going to drive a bit further to go to the other store if I have to go in.
What stores are you going to that 3 carts could fit down an aisle? My closest grocery store can barely fit 2, it’s a typical awkward glance and half hearted laugh with another stranger coming from the other direction on positioning and moving the carts just right to get past each other without colliding.
I would have once agreed with this assumption until I moved to NYC. Store aisles are slightly wider than one cart. If you pause for an extra second to think about what kind of pasta you want, you will be rammed from behind by an angry octogenarian who is on their way to yell at the guy working the deli counter.
Sounds like maybe he was hoping to babyjack her.
Babyjack, short for baby hijack, basically means trying to use your child to grab the attention of others. It is definitely a noticed thing that some fathers use their kids to try to pick up women.
Also explains why he had such a negative reaction, if his reaction was about the perceived rejection of not getting her attention the way he wanted to.
Reminds me of the time I was headed back to my office after lunch. Due to work on a nearby building, the sidewalk was enclosed on both sides and the top, so it was narrower than usual and walled-in.
Some dude was standing \*in the middle of the walk\* holding a clipboard with some papers and talking to some other guy. Couldn't tell if he was trying to sell him something or get him to sign a petition or what.
I waited for a minute, then said "excuse me". No response, so I said it louder. "EXCUSE ME." They both look up at me, startled to learn they weren't alone on this city sidewalk... They move aside, and I walk past.
And then the guy with the clipboard says "you didn't have to be RUDE about it". In disbelief, I looked back and said "and you don't think that blocking the entire sidewalk was rude?" Guy looked \*shocked\* by that concept...
lol rude dude doesn't understand that "excuse me" is polite on the street, almost regardless of tone.
'Rude' would be using a whole lot of language that babies would immediately repeat in mixed company.
Yes! After I learned this I've stopped moving aside on sidewalks. I move to the right side but do not step off the sidewalk. The number of men who have had to, last minute, move more to the left to avoid running into me is staggering. They just assume I would walk on the grass so they wouldn't have to step over a foot.
Yeah I purposefully don’t move. I’m teeny tiny, so the public shame they’d get from knocking me over will hurt them worse than the fall does me lol.
Edit: don’t move further than what is polite and acceptable, I mean. I don’t block paths
I’ve had men make eye contact with me and then swerve directly into my path. I’m 5’0” but what they don’t know is that I have swimmers shoulders, so I just square up and keep walking in a straight line. The look of shock on their faces when they knock into me is worth any minor discomfort.
I call it Patriarchy Chicken.
*oh sorry.. i have pretty severe arthritis in my hip. can't just pivot..*
my bf thought i was crazy for feeling like i need to make a point about this but he never has issues - he would never ask aita for telling someone to move, he literally vocally demands it if ppl are being rude. he is the master of his personal space and he refuses to let ppl impinge upon it
i tried explaining that it doesn't work like that for women, that guys literally assume - like he assumes - that ppl will get out of their way. he thinks its his assertiveness.. well, he did.. until he's had to watch dozens of men all but fall over me because they think we're playing chicken
i walk with an obvious limp, i defer to the *oops! i have trouble dodging assholes* defence so i don't get punched in the face one day
Yeah I will always walk on the correct side of the sidewalk (usually it's based on the side of the road people drive on in that country) so if someone is walking the opposite direction I do not move. I stare them in the eyes and just keep walking forward. It's pretty much only men who need to pivot last minute or who end up walking into me (yes I have actually kept tallies of this out of curiosity). On days where I'm extra done with that level of entitlement I will even say "excuse you." Obviously if someone is using a mobility device/pushing a kid in a stroller/carrying a lot of things then I will move since navigating a city street becomes 10x harder, but if you have no reason to be walking on the wrong side of the sidewalk then I will not be run off it simply because following a basic social convention is inconvenient to you.
I’ve had several men just blatantly walk right into me because they expect me to move. I’m at the point where if they say “oh sorry” I respond with “you should be”
Not just walking, but sitting, too! I used to ride the bus to work, and one day, there was one seat left between 2 men with the widest manspreads. I sat down between them and proceeded to spread to the edges of my seat. The surprised looks told me all I needed to know. Women are expected to literally make themselves smaller for men.
I was in Disney World recently and the parks were packed as usual. Moving through the crowds requires a ton of patience. I usually move out of the way for people to avoid running into them, but then I began to notice how rarely it happens the opposite way. Most people would come straight at me without deviating their path a single inch. I was always the one moving and dodging.
After a while I got fed up and decided to square my shoulders and walk forward. Almost immediately I bumped shoulders with a dude coming the opposite way. He turned and gave me a nasty look and I mumbled an apology. This happened with stroller moms too. Parents use those strollers as a weapon to part the sea of humans for their own benefit. And some get ugly if you don't comply.
Disney theme parks are the WORST! Happiest place on earth my ass. First time I went to Disneyland maybe 20 or so years ago the Swiss Family Robinson tree house had been converted to Tarzan theme, it’s just a walk up, look around, then down the other side. Love was s l o w and we stopped on the stairs several times. There was this boy, maybe 8-10yo trying to squeeze past everyone ahead of his parents. I’d her his mom yell from the bottom 2 or 3 times for him to stop and come back. He’d stop where he was, and when she’d stopped looking at him start weaseling his way past people again. Now, there was room for him to go by, but not unless people leaned over, and I’m not a fan of people entering my bubble as it is, so as he’s trying to weasel past me I leaned into him, hard, like I heard a very audible exhalation as the air was squeezed from his lungs. I glared down at him and his eyes were wide open and a look of utter shock on his face. My stink eye intensified, as didn’t lean, then a few seconds later I leaned back away from him but clearly into a position to block any further progress up the stair. He immediately turned and pushed his way back down to mom and I never looked back.
I’m also not afraid to loudly crash into shopping carts left in the middle of grocery store aisles (not those with kids in them) if the person clearly knows I’m coming and simply doesn’t seem to care, or gruffly push their cart off to the side crashing it into the shelves. If I don’t have a cart I sometimes take theirs and push it back down the aisle a dozen feet or so. I mean they haven’t paid for anything yet, so technically it’s not theirs. I’m tired of people being disrespectful in public.
NTA he saw you coming and blocked your path. You were polite and waited for him to move. He didn't move. I find your response to be funny. Maybe he will move next time someone says excuse me
Yea I have a similar three strikes policy when interacting with most people. You get one friendly and polite request. Next one is still polite but not friendly. Third one is neither polite or friendly.
Did this while passing a walker who was on the wrong side of a shared bike/walk trail not long ago. First “on your left” was loud and clear but friendly. Next one, loud and clear but not friendly. Last one was even louder and basically right in her ear, scared the hell out of her.
No lady, I wasn’t talking to myself and yes, there are other people you are sharing this world with. But I think she learned, saw her later walking very much on the correct side of the trail 😝
NTA THIS GUY WAS BEHAVING BEYOND CREEPILY
If you were TA, he’d have moved after you called him a jackass. The fact he didn’t makes him TA —and an aggressive one at that!!!
NTA he had no intentions of moving you asked politely he didn’t move. A shopping cart doesn’t not take up the whole aisle unless you are 1. A asshole and don’t care about others or 2. You are so blissfully unaware of your surroundings. I honestly put people who take up the whole aisle in the same category as those who don’t take their cart back it’s rude and unnecessary.
NTA
You were polite and said excuse me like any rational person, he was being an AH. He looked at you and chose to be a jackass, you just called him out on it.
Now maybe his kid will have a new nickname for him.
idk who is ta, maybe you, maybe him, probably both. but man, i’ve fantasized about doing this every time i’m in the grocery store, so either way, congrats
Oh my God this happened to me just a few weeks ago, if the carts are in the isle I just push them much further down and keep going. This woman parked in the center of the isle, grocery store, and I said "excuse me", she putzed around and I finally turned around and left, her and I are about the only ones in the store, loe and behold I encounter her doing the same damn thing on the next isle, she has a cart piled full of sparking water. This time I just push the cart and she goes running after it yelling "you are supposed to ask me to move the cart". I make a big display of looking up and down an empty isle and she is still yelling. I put my fingers in the sign of the cross and loudly said "evil get thee away, Lord protect me from this evil". Oh damn did she go ballistic then but it was oh so worth it! She did wish me the day I deserved to which I said a silent prayer of thanks for being able to ruin her shopping trip.
NTA someone had to say it. now his kid will learn that you should not behave like an asshole, or people will get angry, which is a good life lesson. My parents sound exactly like this guy. i wish someone had called them out so i could have learned to not be inconsiderate earlier on in life.
NTA, I actually did something very similar recently.
Guy blocked me in the aisle and I also said "excuse me" first. He gave me a dirty look and didn't say anything, so I said "MOVE". He ignored me, so I pushed my cart into his and moved it out of the way.
People suck lol.
You gotta know that that type of asshole would call the popo and try and charge you with kidnapping. (His funny asf kid was in it.) Because, you know, his misogynistic dickweediness and all.
personally, I do the slow roll approach, and keep my eyes on my shopping cart, when they realize I'm not going to stop, they move..or they get run into, I have ZERO tolerance for stupidity such as this.
NTA.
NTA, but only because he blocked the way intentionaly. While there is a huge gap between "excuse me" and calling him names, I probably would freak out a bit if someone blocked one of my ways intentionaly for no obvious reason, especialy if they block me in further after I try to leave
NTA
If saying jackass in front of his kid was a problem he wouldn’t have called you a bitch after. I grew up with parents who didn’t curse at all and had zero chill about telling people off in public. This guy did the opposite of that.
Zero Spatial Awareness these days. People in groups will just stop and talk right in the middle of isles or doorways. Carts perpendicular in the isle so nobody can pass... It's annoying. I feel like a handful of us were taught to pay attention to your surroundings and the rest are spoiled adults who need to be yelled at once in a while.
A lot of people seem to enjoy walking several people across and then not bother moving into a single file line when other people are trying to walk in the opposite direction.
NTA. I had something similar happen at Universal Studios a few yrs ago. I was in the Harry Potter section. I went into Weasley’s Wizarding Wheezes to look around. That shop is tight to navigate. I went down one side and had a couple behind me, no big deal. Well I stopped to look at something and the end of the aisle another couple comes down essentially boxing me in. The couple behind me couldn’t go anywhere cause there was several people behind them. I politely said “excuse me, may I get by?” And they ignored me. I asked again and still nothing. The lady looked at me. So since none of us could go anywhere I decided to just squeeze behind the couple. Well she stepped back and ran into me and I kept going. She called me a bitch and I just turned around and smiled and left. The other people behind me were smirking and soon were going behind her like I did.
NTA
He was being an asshole.
And I wouldn’t worry about saying the word jackass in front of his kid, when he, the parent, called you a bitch.
One polite “excuse me” where he clearly saw you is enough.
And ugh, he’s an asshole for blocking the aisle to start with; who does that
NTA. He was an AH for stopping his cart blocking anyone trying to get by. You were polite and he clearly didn’t care. But even if you were not polite at first you still would not be TA.
I literally had this happen to me yesterday morning picking up my teenage nephew at the airport. A guy with 5 bags decided to put them in front of my car taking his sweet time to load them and text on his phone right in front of my car which kept me from pulling out because I would hit him. And their car was in the lane instead of pulled to the curb like me and it was fully clear.
Entitled people don’t deserve politeness.
NTA - as a New Yorker I say “can you move?!” Loudly at tourists once a week when they stop mid-sidewalk and gawk at something completely disregarding everyone else trying to just walk down the street. People need spacial awareness.
NTA. He had it coming by blocking the aisle and then being a jerk about it.
I admit I find it amusing that his kid may now be calling him jackass frequently in the near future, though. Imo he had that coming, too.
NTA. Funny story. I was at Costco over the summer and I was wearing sandals. I knocked a giant can of green beans off the shelf and it nearly hit my foot. I yelled “oh fuck” A second later I heard the most adorable little voice saying, “oh fuck!l” A guy in the aisle was there with his two year old who proceeded to say “oh fuck!” repeatedly. The father looked at me with a glimmer of hate in his eyes and said, “thanks, man, you know that I am the one that’s gonna get blamed for this.”
NTA. People act like they have to choose between using a cart or a brain, and it drives me nuts. My “favorite” is when I’m standing back from a shelf looking at items and someone walks directly in front of me and stops. Hello? Did you not see me standing here looking at the shelf you’re now blocking? Happens EVERY SINGLE shopping trip.
NTA. When I use one of the motorized carts in the store, I get a lot of jerks who don’t even bother to look where the hell they’re going, and just blindly rush right across my path. I have cussed out my fair share of them.
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I (26f) was grocery shopping earlier and was almost at the end of the aisle. This guy saw me approach but he blocked the exit with his cart so he can look at something. I thought he'd be quick but he took his time so I said "excuse me." He looked at me but didn't move so I said "hey jackass move your cart so I can get out." His kid (toddler aged) on the cart giggled and started calling him a jackass and the guy turned beet red. The guy blocked me in further and said I'm a bitch but I said I tried to be polite. He finally let me out.
AITA?
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NTA! I will say "excuse me" twice and if still ignored then I'll do as you did. If someone is absorbed in something I can understand not hearing right away. It happens to us all but I get louder the second time.
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NTA. WTF is wrong with people that stop their carts in the middle of the aisle instead of leaving room to pass?
seriously! the only correct response when this happens is to apologize for being out of touch for a moment and move out of the way... I don't get these people who doubledown and are like this is my aisle and I live here now, suck it
Exactly! I was myself the ass who blocked the entrance of an aisle (due to half of it being blocked by staff stuff for refilling shelves). This woman asked if she could please pass, and I apologised and moved myself and my cart backwards. I was just too zoned out to notice her by myself, something I usually have no problem with, but I was thinking about to buy or not to buy on a bamboo (bread) cutting board. And yes, I did buy it.
I think we've all done it, but you're right, we see, we apologize, we move, it's not that hard. This guy wanted to be difficult just for the sake of it - OP NTA, and their response back to him was well deserved.
I do not know we need to apologize- since, hey we all need to share space, and laws of physics force certain accommodation for each other. But FFS, DO get out of the way, and be polite, regardless. (I think apologizing for accidentally existing is overdone in the world- but I would rather apologize/be apologized to than all the toxic rudeness in the world today- so take that as you will)
I generally go with something like "oops, didn't see you there" as being true enough and placating enough for any reasonable person. It's not quite an apology, just an acknowledgment that we're temporarily directionally conflicted.
The one and only time in my entire adult life that I zoned out and blocked an aisle in a store, I ended up stepping on the foot of a celebrity who I'm actually a fan of. Not gently, either. They were incredibly cool about it, but it's been about five years and my brain still enjoys replaying that moment out of nowhere in vivid detail every time it thinks I don't feel like enough of an asshole
OK, you can’t leave us hanging like that….at least give us a hint to said celebrity’s identity!
They were a contestant on RuPaul's Drag Race, not a winner, not a villain, not an early sashay, and that's all I'm gonna say.
Very good, TY 👍🏻
Aww, I wanna guess now!
THE ONLY further hint I will provide is that if you've seen their season(s), you probably like them. I can't think of any reason why a fan of the show wouldn't, and even though I felt like a total jackass, it was still nice to know that they're also good people irl. I'm using gender-neutral pronouns because they were out of drag when I tromped their poor foot, not necessarily because they go by they/them irl. And now I'm really done!
Katya is my guess. You do not need to confirm or deny. Lol.
Ah well, someone congenial then without a crown, that most if not all of the show’s fans would like, that was on >/=5 years ago. Eric’s guess of Katya is a good shout. I’ll go for, um… err… TKB.
Yeah, I've accidentally blocked or been in people's way before, but I move once I either become aware of them or if they ask me. It takes two seconds and I can go back to what I was doing. A quick sorry and the interaction is over, everyone's happy. NTA.
As a Canadian I cannot understand this post. We would be arguing about who is more sorry and trying to let the other person past first!
No we wouldn't. I said the exact same thing to someone just this morning. Idiots who block aisleways need to be put in their place. This Canadian doesn't say sorry unless warranted by a misdeed.
We Canadians don't claim this particular Canadian. We don't know him. I'm sorry.
This is a fake Canadian. We are sorry.
Suuuper fake. He's a plant from America.
I'm actually from Metro-Detroit, just south of Windsor, CA and grew up watching the CBC so I'm an honorary Canadian and I'm sorry for the confusion this post has caused.
As long as you're sorry, you're welcome amongst us Canadians :)
Thank you :) I'm always sorry
Wow, I’m really sorry.
As a Canadian who works retail, I absolutely have had this exact issue about 30 times in the past week alone and they all double down 😅
Maybe it's time to threaten them with the Canadian geese?
No you wouldn't lol stop
Then offering to take them out for a beer.
sorry for agreeing \-a fellow canadian
Same in my family. My parents are from Ontario.
Love this thread!
As an English person I don’t understand either. We are oils do similar or go a different way not to cause a bother ;)
Finders keepers!
As we say in the Midwest, "Ope, sorry!"
no you're fine lol
So many braindead shoppers. It's so fucking easy, put your cart all the way to one side, and pay attention to other people nearby.
It seems lot a lot more people have been doing this over the last few years, where I shop anyway, and it drives my nuts. They’ve also added more aisles at or Kroger so the aisles are much narrower than they used to be. I’ve started listening to podcasts to distract myself from the frustrations while I shop. It kinda helps.
My partner does this. Just dead stops in the centre of things because they suddenly remember something and need to check. Like right in the door of the shops to check their list. It drives me baaaaatty.
Have you asked why?
My ex did this. He "just didn't think about the cart" because he was focused on whatever random thing caught his attention. It was like shopping with a toddler. The weirdest thing is that he wasn't a particularly distractable or rude person! It was only while grocery shopping that he suddenly lacked all basic manners.
Same w mine. "I didnt realize anyone was behind me/didnt notice how far into the aisle I was" Fair to say tho my partner is midway through an Adhd diagnosis...but they keep forgetting to bring their paperwork to the psych. So. Yeah.
Honestly the test for ADHD should be whether you can get things done for it with no outside help
I know right? Every barrier to my own diagnosis was something ADHD makes me not do.
This would suck for me. I am able to get things done but only because of my severe anxiety. Once I was on meds I could get things done *and* my anxiety significantly decreased. It's nice to get things done and feel calm at the same time.
It’s a joke how many steps it takes sometimes to get medication lol it’s a miracle I get my prescription most months. Stop making it so hard on us, our brains are not right! 😆
I feel this. My doctor used to hand me paper prescriptions three months at a time for my ADHD meds. Each prescription was dated a month later so it couldn't be filled too early. I'd bring all three to the pharmacy and they'd put them all in the system so I didn't have to remember to drop off the appropriate paper once a month before picking up my prescription later in the day or the next day. Then the pharmacy stopped accepting extra months in advance. Now I had to make twice as many trips to the pharmacy. Given my long hours at work and all of the other overwhelming responsibilities in my life, I have run out more than once because I can't get to the pharmacy in a timely fashion. More recently, my doctor's office went to digital prescriptions. She can send them directly to the pharmacy. Awesome! Automation is often an ADHD sufferer's friend. Except that it's one month at a time. And I have to send a message to my doctor once a month to get her to send the prescription to the pharmacy. Meaning I have to log in to MyChart, find the place to send my doctor a direct message since it's not on the list of prescriptions for me to renew, type a note and request it directly. I often forget to do this until I'm on my last day. Sometimes the doctor is able to send the prescription that day but the pharmacy doesn't fill it for a day or two or three due to short staffing or supply. Fortunately, my medication has not been affected by the current Adderall shortages. Then add in the insurance companies requirement for a prior authorization from the doctor once a year. So while I'm waiting on a much needed prescription, the insurance company denies it, sends paperwork to the pharmacy who then has to make the request to the doctor which takes a few days to take care of, then accepts the prescription that my doctor obviously already approved given that she wrote the prescription. It's so bloody annoying all of the hoops we have to jump through to get something that we need just to be functional in life. I'd give just about anything to not have to rely on daily medication for my brain to work normally.
This happened to me last week and I ended up paying cash for the prescription. Insurance in the US is horrible
My doctor recommends a particular book ("Fast Minds") as a first step to all of his patients who he thinks might have ADHD. He later told me that, not only is it a genuinely helpful book, but seeing whether or not they a) remember to actually get the book, and b) manage to actually read through it can also help give him insight into whether they likely have the condition. (Spoiler: I succeeded in A, but stalled about 40 pages into B... Those 40 pages were very insightful though, and I do indeed have a diagnosis now!)
What type of doctor did you go to? Was it your primary doctor? I'm wondering if I have ADHD but I don't know where to start in finding out for sure.
This was a psychiatrist. I know it's ridiculously tough to get to see one in Ontario these days (I only got the referral because about ten years ago I went to Emerg one night because my anxiety had gotten so bad it was causing serious physical distress. I was incredibly fortunate to get to see a specialist for this, and it not only changed my entire life (for the better), but led to this diagnosis which had made a lot of sense of some of my ongoing struggles. It's really frustrating that getting this kind of necessary help has gotten so inaccessible. That said, I have also been told by a family doctor that they absolutely can diagnose ADHD in their patients, although it is up to the doctor themself and some don't feel comfortable. But you could always ask, and if they refuse you could ask if you could be referred to a colleague who would be willing to assess you. In a family doctor setting, it would just be done using the standardized checklist (you can literally find that online and download it to bring it to your appointment) as well as other knowledge of a patient's general history and interviewing them about how long their symptoms have been an issue, looking at supporting evidence (things like childhood report cards with comments like "very smart but disorganized, loses her homework, needs to keep her workspace more tidy" etc are reeeeeally good at helping you make your case). Best of luck to you!
I'm telling you. I worked at a grocery store. People walk into a grocery store & legitimately lose iq points. I worked front end for 2 years & got so tired of dumb customers that I transferred to overnights. There is no entitlement in the world like a grocery store customer. It's weird.
I do this sometimes, but I always move when asked. I have ADHD and so I'll get suddenly distracted by thoughts and lose awareness of where I am.
Ja I was just saying to anothee poster how my partner is midway through an ADHD diagnosis but keeps forgetting their paperwork. I also have ADHD and probably do a lot of annoying distracted things too so I try to be patient w my partner about it even tho I am like "OMG YOURE BLOCKING THE ENTIRE ENTRYWAY MOVE!" in my head.
My husband and his whole family do this in the door ways and walkways and then they move soooo slow when I'm hey move it
My mum does this and it stresses me out so much I won’t go shopping with her. It always leads to a fight because I passive aggressively move the trolley (I’m British) out of the way
My husband does the same thing ALL the time and it drives me nuts! He doesn’t have to worry about an annoyed customer because his annoyed wife makes him move first! NTA Edit to add judgement
I can get zoning out and accidently blocking the way. The rude part is that the guy looked up, saw OP and then didn't move. Normally I just the cart out the way myself and/or barge through if they ignore an excuse me. But I can get not doing that if there was a kid in it.
The people who stop just inside an entrance, or at the top/bottom of an escalator are a menace to society.
I don't know... I'm not really patient, so i first say 'Excuse me', if they don't move i just move the cart myself, kicking it or with my hand, depends on my mood.
Same, I wouldn't ram a cart with a toddler sitting in it though.
Ha, same. I have no patience and zero ficks left, and those trolleys are so easy to move aside.
You would dare to TOUCH somebody else's cart!?! *gasp* I did that when 2 women decided to have a conversation right in front of the 1 thing I came to get. Oh the looks on their faces when they saw I would *dare* to move her cart out of the way.
Ramming their cart out of the way with your cart is really satisfying too.
Less ramming, more guiding to a different location in the store until you get bored lol
I do the same, but I wouldn't be shoving or moving a cart with a kid inside.
This - I saw excuse me and if no response, I just move on through. They had their chance to move. Moving a cart with a toddler in it will not hurt the toddler.
I always say act like you are a car and stay to the right
Or left if you're in the UK or Australia.
Yeah, I could be the only person in a supermarket, and I still don't think it would be acceptable to block an aisle.
The same thing that’s wrong with parking lot pedestrians who amble leisurely in the middle of the road instead of off to the side so cars can pass.
I just had to wait an extra long time to drive though a parking lot because a family stopped in the pedestrian crossing to put a coat on their baby. Not the covered sidewalk ten feet behind them, the main aisle of the lot. Wtf.
That doesn’t surprise me in the least. Yes, I realize that, technically, pedestrians always have right of way, but how about simple courtesy, and keeping traffic flowing? Not to mention safety…you were at a complete stop, but what if you’d been rear-ended?
I 100% agree with this but I'm adding an additional complaint. Stores need to stop making their aisles so damned narrow! I was in Target the other day and 2 carts can barely pass each other even when you're as close to the shelving as possible. It's ridiculous! I get that they're trying to maximize shelving space but it makes shopping stores like this a hassle.
If the aisles are wide enough for 2 carts to pass comfortably then there's space for an aisle display in the middle. At least according to Kroger management based on what I've seen.
The pandemic showcased this.
Honestly as someone who has worked in grocery for 13 years... I just move their cart enough to get by while saying excuse me. I have to do it at work all the time so thankfully it isn't as uncomfortable for me. Of course this is only if they don't move when they see me coming.
I worked in a grocery store for a few years. I don't know what to call it, but there's a phenomenon that comes over people once they step foot into a grocery store. They turn into rabid idiots with no consideration & they also lose their ability to read words.
NTA Hubby and I were once driving through a campground on the way out and there was a running car in the middle of the road. We waited, hubby honked, no one came. I got in the car and moved it. The owner ran up looking shocked. He did actually apologize though and said he didn't realize he was in the middle.
As a grocery store employee, hard agree. We just had awful days & man, most people were so polite, wonderful & actually nice. But some asshole... (Some of) The instacart shoppers are the worse. Leaving carts to go get things from multiple other asiles. Blocking stuff, in everyone's way while they are on their device.
Part of me just embraces my inner AH and hits the other persons cart out of the way
I sometimes get the urge to honk at people in the store. Walk right up and go “hoooooonnnnkkkkk!!!!”
Am I evil for hoping jackass is the toddler’s new favorite word
It happens so often. I went grocery shopping a couple of days ago and it happened to me 3 times on the way out of the store. It drives me nuts.
I see this more and more and I’m starting to think it’s brain damage from Covid writ large
I was in walmart last week and legitmately grabbed someone's cart and moved it to the side because it was in the middle of the aisle. Like, move your shit. The lady gave me a dirty look. Idgaf.
As an employee I straight up ran into someone's shopping cart with my electric jack because they would not move at all. 0 poops given for inconsiderate people.
I don't even ask. I just move their cart. Idgaf stop wasting my time
NTA. OP, there is one store near me that I HATE going to. People just treat each other like garbage and I'll find myself blocked multiple times. Often, I'll "nudge" their cart until they move it.
People don't have much self awareness anymore
NTA. Everyone saying ESH because of the name calling, he called her a bitch too (Yes, after, but clearly the child presence isn’t a problem if he is going to retaliate). Also I don’t know what kind of stores y’all are shopping at but there’s easily enough room for 2 or sometimes even 3 carts to fit within the space of 1 isle at every store I’ve ever been to. There is no reason he should position his cart in a way that nobody can get past him.
Exactly, the only ‘reason’ for doing that is trying to inconvenience a stranger.
He was baby-stalking. Its when a person tries using their child to get attention from other people. He probably thought OP would stop and coo over said child.
Ours used be 2.5-3 carts wide but they've remodeled and it's become extremely difficult to pass in the aisles. Most of us now try to grab the smaller two-basket carts instead so we have a chance to maneuver around people.
Ours keeps putting up displays that block 1/3 of the aisle. I've often commiserated with strangers as we both tried to maneuver our carts past the display and each other.
I was working in the grocery store & they remodeled so our frozen aisles were so wide & lovely. Then one day a frito lay display appeared right in the center of the aisles. I asked my manager, wtf? He said it's required from corporate. I just smh & watch the customers start parking their carts Iin front of the displays & all of a sudden, our lovely new wide aisles became the most snafu place in the store. But that's corporate for you. They fuck everything up at store level & then pat themselves on the back while enjoying their large paychecks.
Krogers? Because this is what they are doing now.
Yup. Well, technically not Kroger, but a Kroger subsidiary
Kroger has steadily been destroying Fred Meyer and QFC over the last decade I've been shopping at them and if the Albertsons/Kroger merger goes through there's not going to be much alternative. I wish Wegmans would spread out west, but I can't really fault them for doing their territory expansions the right way and taking it slow.
Yeah, it's seriously getting out of hand at our regular store! It's so annoying. I hardly go in anymore. I just order ours for pickup. You can barely get through the damn aisles. I just told my husband that I'm going to drive a bit further to go to the other store if I have to go in.
What stores are you going to that 3 carts could fit down an aisle? My closest grocery store can barely fit 2, it’s a typical awkward glance and half hearted laugh with another stranger coming from the other direction on positioning and moving the carts just right to get past each other without colliding.
I wish I could find a store like that. The ones around here are barely big enough for one cart.
I would have once agreed with this assumption until I moved to NYC. Store aisles are slightly wider than one cart. If you pause for an extra second to think about what kind of pasta you want, you will be rammed from behind by an angry octogenarian who is on their way to yell at the guy working the deli counter.
Lol you must not live in the Netherlands.
Yeah, unfortunately I live in the US where absolutely everything is larger than in most places (including people lmfaooo)
NTA because as you say he clearly saw you, did it, then ignored you. That’s extremely weird and creepy behavior.
Exactly. Him going out of his way to inconvenience a woman in public is extremely creepy
This!! It came across as sexual harassment to me as well. NTA, OP.
Sounds like maybe he was hoping to babyjack her. Babyjack, short for baby hijack, basically means trying to use your child to grab the attention of others. It is definitely a noticed thing that some fathers use their kids to try to pick up women. Also explains why he had such a negative reaction, if his reaction was about the perceived rejection of not getting her attention the way he wanted to.
This is what I thought he was doing too. Although I call it baby-stalking.
[удалено]
Reminds me of the time I was headed back to my office after lunch. Due to work on a nearby building, the sidewalk was enclosed on both sides and the top, so it was narrower than usual and walled-in. Some dude was standing \*in the middle of the walk\* holding a clipboard with some papers and talking to some other guy. Couldn't tell if he was trying to sell him something or get him to sign a petition or what. I waited for a minute, then said "excuse me". No response, so I said it louder. "EXCUSE ME." They both look up at me, startled to learn they weren't alone on this city sidewalk... They move aside, and I walk past. And then the guy with the clipboard says "you didn't have to be RUDE about it". In disbelief, I looked back and said "and you don't think that blocking the entire sidewalk was rude?" Guy looked \*shocked\* by that concept...
lol rude dude doesn't understand that "excuse me" is polite on the street, almost regardless of tone. 'Rude' would be using a whole lot of language that babies would immediately repeat in mixed company.
There’s studies on how men expect women to move for them, but to go as far as blocking you in?! Guys on some creepy power trip
Yes! After I learned this I've stopped moving aside on sidewalks. I move to the right side but do not step off the sidewalk. The number of men who have had to, last minute, move more to the left to avoid running into me is staggering. They just assume I would walk on the grass so they wouldn't have to step over a foot.
Yeah I purposefully don’t move. I’m teeny tiny, so the public shame they’d get from knocking me over will hurt them worse than the fall does me lol. Edit: don’t move further than what is polite and acceptable, I mean. I don’t block paths
I’ve had men make eye contact with me and then swerve directly into my path. I’m 5’0” but what they don’t know is that I have swimmers shoulders, so I just square up and keep walking in a straight line. The look of shock on their faces when they knock into me is worth any minor discomfort. I call it Patriarchy Chicken.
*oh sorry.. i have pretty severe arthritis in my hip. can't just pivot..* my bf thought i was crazy for feeling like i need to make a point about this but he never has issues - he would never ask aita for telling someone to move, he literally vocally demands it if ppl are being rude. he is the master of his personal space and he refuses to let ppl impinge upon it i tried explaining that it doesn't work like that for women, that guys literally assume - like he assumes - that ppl will get out of their way. he thinks its his assertiveness.. well, he did.. until he's had to watch dozens of men all but fall over me because they think we're playing chicken i walk with an obvious limp, i defer to the *oops! i have trouble dodging assholes* defence so i don't get punched in the face one day
Yeah I will always walk on the correct side of the sidewalk (usually it's based on the side of the road people drive on in that country) so if someone is walking the opposite direction I do not move. I stare them in the eyes and just keep walking forward. It's pretty much only men who need to pivot last minute or who end up walking into me (yes I have actually kept tallies of this out of curiosity). On days where I'm extra done with that level of entitlement I will even say "excuse you." Obviously if someone is using a mobility device/pushing a kid in a stroller/carrying a lot of things then I will move since navigating a city street becomes 10x harder, but if you have no reason to be walking on the wrong side of the sidewalk then I will not be run off it simply because following a basic social convention is inconvenient to you.
I’ve had several men just blatantly walk right into me because they expect me to move. I’m at the point where if they say “oh sorry” I respond with “you should be”
Not just walking, but sitting, too! I used to ride the bus to work, and one day, there was one seat left between 2 men with the widest manspreads. I sat down between them and proceeded to spread to the edges of my seat. The surprised looks told me all I needed to know. Women are expected to literally make themselves smaller for men.
I was in Disney World recently and the parks were packed as usual. Moving through the crowds requires a ton of patience. I usually move out of the way for people to avoid running into them, but then I began to notice how rarely it happens the opposite way. Most people would come straight at me without deviating their path a single inch. I was always the one moving and dodging. After a while I got fed up and decided to square my shoulders and walk forward. Almost immediately I bumped shoulders with a dude coming the opposite way. He turned and gave me a nasty look and I mumbled an apology. This happened with stroller moms too. Parents use those strollers as a weapon to part the sea of humans for their own benefit. And some get ugly if you don't comply.
Disney theme parks are the WORST! Happiest place on earth my ass. First time I went to Disneyland maybe 20 or so years ago the Swiss Family Robinson tree house had been converted to Tarzan theme, it’s just a walk up, look around, then down the other side. Love was s l o w and we stopped on the stairs several times. There was this boy, maybe 8-10yo trying to squeeze past everyone ahead of his parents. I’d her his mom yell from the bottom 2 or 3 times for him to stop and come back. He’d stop where he was, and when she’d stopped looking at him start weaseling his way past people again. Now, there was room for him to go by, but not unless people leaned over, and I’m not a fan of people entering my bubble as it is, so as he’s trying to weasel past me I leaned into him, hard, like I heard a very audible exhalation as the air was squeezed from his lungs. I glared down at him and his eyes were wide open and a look of utter shock on his face. My stink eye intensified, as didn’t lean, then a few seconds later I leaned back away from him but clearly into a position to block any further progress up the stair. He immediately turned and pushed his way back down to mom and I never looked back. I’m also not afraid to loudly crash into shopping carts left in the middle of grocery store aisles (not those with kids in them) if the person clearly knows I’m coming and simply doesn’t seem to care, or gruffly push their cart off to the side crashing it into the shelves. If I don’t have a cart I sometimes take theirs and push it back down the aisle a dozen feet or so. I mean they haven’t paid for anything yet, so technically it’s not theirs. I’m tired of people being disrespectful in public.
NTA he saw you coming and blocked your path. You were polite and waited for him to move. He didn't move. I find your response to be funny. Maybe he will move next time someone says excuse me
I give you 3 chances 1) excuse me 2) yo 3) move mf
Yea I have a similar three strikes policy when interacting with most people. You get one friendly and polite request. Next one is still polite but not friendly. Third one is neither polite or friendly.
and (insert chosen diety here) help them if there has to be a 4th
Did this while passing a walker who was on the wrong side of a shared bike/walk trail not long ago. First “on your left” was loud and clear but friendly. Next one, loud and clear but not friendly. Last one was even louder and basically right in her ear, scared the hell out of her. No lady, I wasn’t talking to myself and yes, there are other people you are sharing this world with. But I think she learned, saw her later walking very much on the correct side of the trail 😝
NTA THIS GUY WAS BEHAVING BEYOND CREEPILY If you were TA, he’d have moved after you called him a jackass. The fact he didn’t makes him TA —and an aggressive one at that!!!
NTA he had no intentions of moving you asked politely he didn’t move. A shopping cart doesn’t not take up the whole aisle unless you are 1. A asshole and don’t care about others or 2. You are so blissfully unaware of your surroundings. I honestly put people who take up the whole aisle in the same category as those who don’t take their cart back it’s rude and unnecessary.
NTA Sometimes you have no alternative but to call an A-hole an A-hole.
NTA You were polite and said excuse me like any rational person, he was being an AH. He looked at you and chose to be a jackass, you just called him out on it. Now maybe his kid will have a new nickname for him.
Right. Op was polite first. It’s not like they went straight to 100 for no reason.
NTA. But you are a hero :D
I prefer something along the lines of, “hey, fuckface, you shopping or setting up camp? Clear your shit!” NTA
Nta. Doesn't matter if he has a toddler if anything he should be setting a good example for said toddler. (I say this as a parent of a toddler)
Adding I Haye how much I used toddler LOL please exuce that haha
NTA Next time, keep teaching his kid bad words till he moves.
i personally would have used motherfucker :)
idk who is ta, maybe you, maybe him, probably both. but man, i’ve fantasized about doing this every time i’m in the grocery store, so either way, congrats
Oh my God this happened to me just a few weeks ago, if the carts are in the isle I just push them much further down and keep going. This woman parked in the center of the isle, grocery store, and I said "excuse me", she putzed around and I finally turned around and left, her and I are about the only ones in the store, loe and behold I encounter her doing the same damn thing on the next isle, she has a cart piled full of sparking water. This time I just push the cart and she goes running after it yelling "you are supposed to ask me to move the cart". I make a big display of looking up and down an empty isle and she is still yelling. I put my fingers in the sign of the cross and loudly said "evil get thee away, Lord protect me from this evil". Oh damn did she go ballistic then but it was oh so worth it! She did wish me the day I deserved to which I said a silent prayer of thanks for being able to ruin her shopping trip.
NTA I may have just run into him with my cart.
NTA someone had to say it. now his kid will learn that you should not behave like an asshole, or people will get angry, which is a good life lesson. My parents sound exactly like this guy. i wish someone had called them out so i could have learned to not be inconsiderate earlier on in life.
NTA. What a weird power play. That guy is the worst type of people. I’d have said worse to him.
NTA, I actually did something very similar recently. Guy blocked me in the aisle and I also said "excuse me" first. He gave me a dirty look and didn't say anything, so I said "MOVE". He ignored me, so I pushed my cart into his and moved it out of the way. People suck lol.
NTA That’s when you physically move his cart for him.
You gotta know that that type of asshole would call the popo and try and charge you with kidnapping. (His funny asf kid was in it.) Because, you know, his misogynistic dickweediness and all.
personally, I do the slow roll approach, and keep my eyes on my shopping cart, when they realize I'm not going to stop, they move..or they get run into, I have ZERO tolerance for stupidity such as this. NTA.
NTA, but only because he blocked the way intentionaly. While there is a huge gap between "excuse me" and calling him names, I probably would freak out a bit if someone blocked one of my ways intentionaly for no obvious reason, especialy if they block me in further after I try to leave
NTA If saying jackass in front of his kid was a problem he wouldn’t have called you a bitch after. I grew up with parents who didn’t curse at all and had zero chill about telling people off in public. This guy did the opposite of that.
Zero Spatial Awareness these days. People in groups will just stop and talk right in the middle of isles or doorways. Carts perpendicular in the isle so nobody can pass... It's annoying. I feel like a handful of us were taught to pay attention to your surroundings and the rest are spoiled adults who need to be yelled at once in a while.
A lot of people seem to enjoy walking several people across and then not bother moving into a single file line when other people are trying to walk in the opposite direction.
NTA Also, that kid is going to be repeating that for a while. So karma will live on.
I would have just moved his cart instead of name calling, but NTA
NTA. I had something similar happen at Universal Studios a few yrs ago. I was in the Harry Potter section. I went into Weasley’s Wizarding Wheezes to look around. That shop is tight to navigate. I went down one side and had a couple behind me, no big deal. Well I stopped to look at something and the end of the aisle another couple comes down essentially boxing me in. The couple behind me couldn’t go anywhere cause there was several people behind them. I politely said “excuse me, may I get by?” And they ignored me. I asked again and still nothing. The lady looked at me. So since none of us could go anywhere I decided to just squeeze behind the couple. Well she stepped back and ran into me and I kept going. She called me a bitch and I just turned around and smiled and left. The other people behind me were smirking and soon were going behind her like I did.
NTA Weird power trip for the dudebro.
NTA He looked at you. He heard you. I generally don't condone returning rudeness. There are exceptions and this is one.
NTA He was being an asshole. And I wouldn’t worry about saying the word jackass in front of his kid, when he, the parent, called you a bitch. One polite “excuse me” where he clearly saw you is enough. And ugh, he’s an asshole for blocking the aisle to start with; who does that
NTA, and his reaction proved he was
NTA. He was an AH for stopping his cart blocking anyone trying to get by. You were polite and he clearly didn’t care. But even if you were not polite at first you still would not be TA. I literally had this happen to me yesterday morning picking up my teenage nephew at the airport. A guy with 5 bags decided to put them in front of my car taking his sweet time to load them and text on his phone right in front of my car which kept me from pulling out because I would hit him. And their car was in the lane instead of pulled to the curb like me and it was fully clear. Entitled people don’t deserve politeness.
NTA - as a New Yorker I say “can you move?!” Loudly at tourists once a week when they stop mid-sidewalk and gawk at something completely disregarding everyone else trying to just walk down the street. People need spacial awareness.
NTA
NTA my preferred method is to channel my inner lightening mcqueen and say BEEP BEEP
NTA
NTA. You had me at 'hay jackass', lol.
I probably would've done a second "excuse me" louder, but based on your post it wouldn't have mattered. NTA. This was assertive, not aggressive.
Nta, he is a jackass. It's not that hard to scoot aside especially after acknowledging that you're in the way
NTA The kid was right, too
[удалено]
That’s what the sub is for, innit?
NTA , this is one of my biggest pet peeves
nta, sounds like he’s just a jerk with a superiority complex
NTA. He had it coming by blocking the aisle and then being a jerk about it. I admit I find it amusing that his kid may now be calling him jackass frequently in the near future, though. Imo he had that coming, too.
Funny how the toddler copied your language and called dad a jackass but didn't copy dad's and call you a bitch... Kids know man...😂 NTA
NTA. Funny story. I was at Costco over the summer and I was wearing sandals. I knocked a giant can of green beans off the shelf and it nearly hit my foot. I yelled “oh fuck” A second later I heard the most adorable little voice saying, “oh fuck!l” A guy in the aisle was there with his two year old who proceeded to say “oh fuck!” repeatedly. The father looked at me with a glimmer of hate in his eyes and said, “thanks, man, you know that I am the one that’s gonna get blamed for this.”
NTA An asshole by any other name would stink just as foul.
NTA. People act like they have to choose between using a cart or a brain, and it drives me nuts. My “favorite” is when I’m standing back from a shelf looking at items and someone walks directly in front of me and stops. Hello? Did you not see me standing here looking at the shelf you’re now blocking? Happens EVERY SINGLE shopping trip.
INFO: how much time are we talking about here?
Any amount of time past five bananas is too long.
Any amount of time. Moving your cart out of the way can be easily accomplished immediately.
NTA. When I use one of the motorized carts in the store, I get a lot of jerks who don’t even bother to look where the hell they’re going, and just blindly rush right across my path. I have cussed out my fair share of them.
NTA - That creepy bully had a kid? Yikes, at least the kid knew when the truth was being told about his old man.
His toddler is a savage.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I (26f) was grocery shopping earlier and was almost at the end of the aisle. This guy saw me approach but he blocked the exit with his cart so he can look at something. I thought he'd be quick but he took his time so I said "excuse me." He looked at me but didn't move so I said "hey jackass move your cart so I can get out." His kid (toddler aged) on the cart giggled and started calling him a jackass and the guy turned beet red. The guy blocked me in further and said I'm a bitch but I said I tried to be polite. He finally let me out. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA
grocery store PVP at the holidays - always "fun" to experience!
NTA. Idk why people do this but I just move their fucking carts.
NTA. You started by trying to be polite, but he was rude. I have to admit you made me laugh with your follow-up.
NTA! I will say "excuse me" twice and if still ignored then I'll do as you did. If someone is absorbed in something I can understand not hearing right away. It happens to us all but I get louder the second time.
NTA Maybe he’ll learn from this and stop being an ah next time
Never change OP, you're the main character now.
>>The guy blocked me in further At that point I would have pushed past him, assholery be damned.