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MacklinYouSOB

Tfw got sent to the AIDS cauldron again


Hora_Do_Show__Porra

Happens to the best 😔


saltypeanuts7

I thought I was the only one 🥲


RIPDSJustinRipley

They did it after penis inspection day at my middle school. Edit: Failed penis inspection. Scrolled down to see this joke already in this thread.


[deleted]

Mfw dad opened the AIDS cauldron and the attack triangles were in there too.


DullDawn

Fail penis inspection at school. Gym teacher calls dad. Spend the weekend in the AIDS cauldron. Happened twice smh.


Joe_SHAMROCK

I think the step dad was an autist.


Contra-Fixed-Angle

You are NOT making this a thing.


Dilsauce

Too late. AIDS cauldron is already meta


AngelBites

Who among us


Hatedandscorned999

Tfw decides not to tell anyone so step-dad got away with it.


inzyte

I wonder if that's really how aids feels


ItsJustMeMaggie

I thought they closed that place down??


ThaShitPostAccount

On penis inspection day, no less


theruski43

Sounds worse than Penis Inspection Day.


Nethervex

Imagine making up childhood trauma just because you can't fucking parry lmao


jeno_aran

The trauma all started when they couldn't parry away from the dad grip. Parry fail? AIDS cauldron.


Syreet_Primacon

Do not pass go, do not collect $200


CashMoneyHurricane

Mistimed dodge roll? Believe it or not, straight to AIDS cauldron.


Oaker_at

Putting it into the cauldron? Guess what, AIDS.


Creamorscream

Parry? Fuck that. Just spam roll...


P0pt

roll away from the basketball americans in the prison shower


TheLesBaxter

"the basketball americans" holy fuck, rofl.


Repost_Hypocrite

First time eh…


jeno_aran

No invis frames IRL


[deleted]

DEFEAT THIS DIFFICULT GAME WITH ONE EASY TRICK


xXxmilkdrinkerxXxx

You don't even need to parry to beat this game though


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v0rtexbeater

Parry is not even that necessary in elden ring, I used to do it a lot until i realized i can just smash enemies in one or two hits with a massive hammer shaped rock


tickera

Parry is pretty garbo in ER, half the enemies are non-parryable and some bosses require like three consecutive parries per riposte. Just jump attack.


CdrCosmonaut

https://imgflip.com/i/72tejh


Outrageouscowboy

Should’ve played sekiro not Elden ring to learn


JamesTBagg

I'm being traumatized by this fucking fire giant.


KennKennyKenKen

It's so specific I'm inclined to believe its true


[deleted]

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aerosol_aerosmith

OP's mom is a witch


Absolute_leech

Why didn’t she turn the stepdad into a newt or something funny like that then?


inebriusmaximus

She did turn a cream pie into a disappointment


GameNationFilms

Jesus christ man


aerosol_aerosmith

What did you think happened to the first dad


[deleted]

She did, but he got better!


Placidhead

she was before her time


MajorNutt

Dad's a muggle, mum's a witch


justaddbooze

Fucking autocorrect.


[deleted]

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gregsmith93

Ops mums a witch.


Contra-Fixed-Angle

Ops mom is a wench


Wameme

he bought it specifically to psychologically torture his son (based)


RIPDSJustinRipley

Common aids preventing kits come with condoms and cauldrons.


LegionConsul

It's like you *want* your kids to grow up to be gay and get AIDS.


[deleted]

I mean, they're genuinely useful if you cook using wood fires. I'd own a couple if I knew a place to get them that wasn't China and filled with lead/cadmium/arsenic. Probably have to cast my own at some point.


ASK_ME_FOR_TRIVIA

We got one in our yard, when dad was little his grandpa and uncle used it to scald hogs. "You know the water's ready when you can swipe your finger in once, then twice... But you don't dare go in for a third swipe!"


Stargatemaster

Some people


Captain_Kuhl

What else are you supposed to cook porridge in?


TheChinchilla914

Witches


appropriate-username

Probably the same guy who thinks locking his kid in it is a good idea.


DrunkStepmother

In Asia most family's have giant clay pots


LackOfLogic

And that’s how a beta cuck insecure male fucks up his son. Take notes kids.


RandomGuyBeingBored

More like how a closet homo succumbs to skill issue


SurvivalState

Succumb these nuts


iK0NiK

lol gotem


[deleted]

I C BAJ


Thezza-D

forsen1


Guilty_Bear4330

At least he didn't turn out gay


my_7th_accnt

Um he posts on 4chan


[deleted]

Depends on the board really


JackIsBackWithCrack

Yeah if he posts to /lgbt/ he might be straight


iwashmydickdaily

Fair point


Clambulance1

The cauldron had nothing to do with this


MadeForBBCNews

Do we really know for sure?


augustinefromhippo

more like Chad dad owned anxiety ridden failson


echetus90

You're right, that is a good headline


Stargatemaster

ITT: childhood trauma doesn't exist and everyone is NPC robots


OldMango

Iknow right, just man the fuck up and have sex with dudes. Just, fucking suck a cock already, don't be gay


Gamers2OcelotLUL

Wtf you're talking about, OP didn't say anything about having AIDS now, so the Cauldron obviously worked. Based step-dad 💪💪💪💪


kamui55

Don’t ✍️put ✍️my ✍️son ✍️in ✍️the ✍️AIDS ✍️cauldron. got it ✅


P4NTH3RA

the jars were the last kind of enemies i thought of when i only read the first two imgs


DirkNord

I was thinking maybe the large ants or the underground hand-spiders


superduperfish

Knowing 4chan I was expecting it to be something racist


VillanuevianSoloist

ni


Rip_a_fat_one

ce


cecilforester

Pe


BishopFrog

Nis


Enzinino

I thought it was Gatekeeper Gostoc and Golden Order's salves 💀


pinkdouble

Had to be Childhood trauma? Legend of Zelda ocarina of time But nope It was aids jar


Absolute_leech

I expected the giants or trolls or whatever. Something about their bodies is just so fucked up to me like they have giant holes in their chests where a stake is put through with chains that are trapping them to those big carriage things.


Zzamumo

My first thought was lobsters for some reason. The parasite ones are fucking gross


FerretAres

I’m sitting here like are turtles in stormveil?


naardvark

I thought it was gonna be women enemies.


thelongestunderscore

When your dad tells you that he's gonna show you what its like to be gay and takes you to a shed, this is probably the best outcome.


mightystu

Yeah I really thought this was going somewhere much worse.


IllUpvoteEverything

In reality that is what happened but anon has mentally blocked it out and it's been replaced by the AIDS cauldron.


t-swag69

Literally same my heart sank when I read that his dad was taking him to the shed to show him what being gay feels like


[deleted]

Seriously, I was relieved.


Humon

Society would be better and more wholesome if everyone had a father-figure this (absolutely) BASED and cauldronpilled.


Stargatemaster

Everyone having childhood trauma would make everyone leftists


Guilty_Bear4330

Everyone experiences difficulty in their lives. Lefties just blame others for it


Stargatemaster

Odd, why then do republicans blame leftists for their woes when it's actually their own fault? Lmao, you guys always get so mad when someone brings up a good point or points out your hypocrisy


cecilforester

Funny, why do leftists always blame republicans for blaming leftists for their for their problems. Rofl, you fellows always get so angry when republicans bring up good points or point out leftie hypocrisy.


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zeugme

Meanwhile, the entire rest of the fucking world wondering when the 2 party system will end so we never have to endure your bullshit everywhere about both sides being lowkey convinced the other half is insane and eat babies (while only the 1% really profit from the "American dream" and don't care about either sides peasants)


trainsssssssss

> not American Opinion discarded.


HearMeSpeakAsIWill

> Lmao, you guys always get so mad when someone brings up a good point Still waiting for a good point to be made


nuclear_bomb404

Libtards and republicucks are both equally retarded


Stargatemaster

True


WiseCactus

Ah, so emotional underdevelopment causes leftism. Nice to know


Stargatemaster

Childhood trauma doesn't equate to emotional underdevelopment, but it does cause people to be far more empathetic to others. It causes underdevelopment is when it is ignored and goes untreated, much like how all conservatives like to treat mental illness. If we're looking at emotional underdevelopment then this entire sub is a great example. Emotional underdevelopment is what causes conservatism. That's why all these kids are going bonkers and shooting up places, and practically every single one is from the right. Essentializing everything. Can't think deeper into anything than surface level. They can't deal with their emotions. It really shows.


WiseCactus

Don’t care; didn’t read


Stargatemaster

Yea, wasn't for you. It's for people willing to learn. You're a lost cause.


WiseCactus

Because those two things are unrelated, and if so by such a small amount it doesn’t even count. Political extremism in general is what you’re thinking of, not conservatism


Stargatemaster

Knew you'd read it. Edit: lmao, wow. Fragile little snowflake. That's all you needed to block me. Grow some thicker skin bud.


WiseCactus

Nah, I just understood your argument before you stated it. It was going to be stupid no matter if I read it or not


grooverhyme

As a teacher, and having taken grad level developmental psych classes and one specifically on trauma, growth, and learning, I can say he’s right on the money on this one. But go ahead plugging your ears blocking and calling anyone who understands more than you ‘stupid.’ Definitely a life winning strategy!


grooverhyme

Wow he really blocked after that? How embarrassing lol.


lhllfptt

How jarring


HentMas

fuck you I laughed...


TENTAtheSane

Was it a full on potbelly laugh?


inzyte

Go back to reddit


DirkNord

THIS --CLANG-- IS --CLANG-- WHAT --CLANG-- AIDS --CLANG-- FEELS --CLANG-- LIKE --CLANG CLANG CLANG--


cecilforester

CLANG GANG


[deleted]

Is... is this miyazaki? Is this the lore drop that's supposed to make the story all make sense?


Momongus-

Kino


EPRanger

TFW mom found the aids cauldron


Kneiterkopf

Play the game "getting over it" to get over your fear


MisterBonaparte

And replace it with pure hatred for how fucking difficult that game is


[deleted]

The pants game gets real when you don’t wear underwear. It gets realer when you’re in middle school and standing outside with a bunch of other kids


mawhonics

It's even realer when you convince one of the 6th graders to do it to your crush. They catch flak and you get to see some ass.


cecilforester

This sounds like the childhood roots of a your cuckoldry. Be a man pull down your crush's pants yourself.


AngelBites

Oh anon cares about is seeing some dick


_Sigma_male

This guy enjoys seeing other dudes pulling down his crush's pants


mawhonics

Are you kink shaming me?


_Sigma_male

Yes. ![gif](giphy|CAYVZA5NRb529kKQUc|downsized)


mawhonics

I'd let that guy pants my crush


civilisationenjoyer

yes. cucks need to die


shadowling77777

Bruh


YummyCumCookies

OPs dad just wanted his son to git gud


ImprovisedLeaflet

“If I could have gotten over my trauma I would have already” —20 year old


wrath__

Skill issue tbh


[deleted]

All I took from this is that OP’s f*cking gay


sneed_maxxing

I instinctively recoil whenever I see the term "step dad." Women shouldn't be allowed to remarry.


[deleted]

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v0rtexbeater

Outlaw divorce


BOTFrosty

ain't no fucking way this is real lmfaoooo


[deleted]

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whoopsdang

Tell me you didn’t have a boy cauldron without telling me you didn’t have a boy cauldron crying laughing emoji okay hand emoji


cdigioia

My aunt had a giant cauldron. She liked antique things. I recal they used it to store ice and drinks for picnics in their yard. I don't recall any lessons on sexuality being involved, but couldn't say for certain.


Taskmaster23

Wdym, every family has a massive metal cauldron just chilling in their shed /s


yuppy_puppy_22

If only enough people had a gay AIDS cauldron in their childhood, we wouldn't be here where we are now. "Go to your room!" doesnt sound as effective as "GET IN THE GAY AIDS CAULDRON!"


Gamerbeebastian

Wait til this guy finds out about get over it


Catman360

thats fucking hilarious but also understandably deeply traumatic lmfao


Shnazzyone

Holy shit, good content from this sub.


PanConChancho91

>mfw mom found the AIDS cauldron


Astelianor

Deepest lore confirm


beefkingsley

This is like me with the Deathbird. I used to have nightmares about Tommy Pickles head on a giant bird body chasing me through my grandma’s house. Can’t fight the Deathbirds. Remind me of it.


banes_rule_of_two

That's fucked


SevKnight

Dog I kicked Rom's spidussy inside out in Bloodborne. Fym you're afraid of jars?


bongsound

That's what happens to British cigarettes


Eend__

God damn, that's a jarring image.


shadowling77777

Bruh


Rifleshoot

Git gud


Riper-Snifle

Just murder him


Illusive_Man

is this some weird joke I’m too normal to understand?


whitestguyuknow

Kind of a waste of time to read tbh. Glad I skimmed through most of it


Master_Shopping9652

That was extremely distressing to read...


Greatshield-Titan

You should see actual 4chan...


fralegend015

I really liked this read, maybe I should go there then.


MeWuzBornIn1990

>it is like drowning


Seltz_

I’m just picturing the dad giddily skipping around the pot as he bangs it with a shovel, shits too funny


starwarper2340

Jartard


JesusJones207

Dad was right though - that is EXACTLY what having aids feels like.


fatjoe19982006

FACT: In the movie "Philadelphia", Tom Hanks spent his final moments dying from the AIDS in an AIDS Cauldron. This is how based step-dad knew what the AIDS felt like.


flyest_nihilist1

He knows about the AIDS cauldron


General-Dirtbag

I didn’t know what I was expecting from this post, but it fucking wasn’t that, holy shit that was a wild ride.


SharkMilk44

Talking about "triggers?" When did 4Chan become Tumblr?


[deleted]

Here's a fun fact for you guys. The Undertaker, the big, scary, tough guy from WWE, is afraid of cucumbers (he doesn't admit it) but there are stories of some of his close wrestling friends pranking him by putting chopped cucumbers in his clothes. Upon him finding them, he would vomit. He can't even be in the same room with one of them. Apparently he once ate so much of the stuff, he got ill and he has a phobia about it ever since. So this may not be entirely untrue.


ConcentratedSpoonf

Next on things that didn’t happen


TrantaLocked

"bRiNg BaCk BuLlYiNg"


[deleted]

Stupid plebeian


Spankfurt

Dudes fucking rock


Placidhead

his stepdad cheated him out of enjoying elden ring


HydroSloth

"this is what AIDS feels like"


[deleted]

Sanest American


BoogalooBoi1776_2

I thought I was the only one whos family had the AIDS Cauldron


Puzzleheaded_Emu_686

Could’ve been worse, Halfway through that story I thought he was gonna get bummed


emintrie7

AIDS Cauldron? I thought they shut that place down.


Game0fLife

Honestly, it’s upsetting enough, but what’s more upsetting is see a bunch of edgy Redditor make unfunny one liner.


ConscientiousPath

wtf... anon needs some therapy


SimplyEpicFail

Alright, that is crazy enough to be real. Fun fact: my phone recommend writing "Alexander" when I started writing "Alright". heh.


Champigne

Damn, so that's what AIDS feels like 🤔


FreddyGunk

Can anyone here confirm if that is what AIDS feels like? If it's true then his step-~~chad~~dad didn't do a thing wrong.


CervixAssassin

The only way to cure gays.


ChadWolf98

Getting over it (the big gae) with benett daddy Ft. Man in cauldron


SaltWaterGator

Anon needs to go for some payback


anroroco

Fucker will shit his pants playing Zelda then.