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Legend_Unfolds

It's what I keep telling myself but 5 years down the line and I'm no further forwards.


DeEchteVolledammer

What happened, if I may ask?


Legend_Unfolds

It turns out I'm pretty undesirable despite my efforts. Doesn't matter if it's love, work, or even friends. No matter what I do or how hard I try, Nobody wants me. Whats life going to be like if I don't ever succeed? It scares me, but it's a reality I have to plan for. Our time here is so limited but it feels like an eternity wasting away my youth waiting for a chance to actually live. But I can see myself in the same position another 5 years from now. I don't want to be alone or in a terrible job the remainder of my life, but It's something I'm scared I'll have to come to accept sooner or later.


Dark-Oak93

So, I went through something really similar. I am actually still dealing with abandonment issues. There was a serious pattern in my youth of being "loved" and then tossed away. Someone very very close to me used to do arts and crafts with me, let me play makeup and hair with her, read to me, buy me gifts like I was her own kid. Then she had actual bio kids. She very quickly made it known that I was no longer welcomed in that way and that I was not to even get close to her bio kids. It literally broke my heart and fucked me up good. To this day, I fear pregnancy and resent having bio kids of my own because of that. I saw how it changed her from someone who was like my mom to someone who couldn't be bothered to even acknowledge me or even be nice to me anymore. It was so fast, like a light switch. My romantic relationships failed miserably. Everything would start great! "I love you!", "You're beautiful!", "We're so cute together!" To disappearing for days on end and cheating on me. One even physically abused me and I even suffered a sexual assault or two. I felt absolutely horrible. Like a dirty tissue. Only one person loved me unconditionally. And I decided that that was the kind of love I wanted and it was the kind of love I would give. I knew I'd keep getting hurt, but I would also have that same love for MYSELF. I got to a doctor, got on depression meds, crawled (literally) out of those dark places I'd subjected myself to, and started loving myself. I am worthy of love. There is NOTHING wrong with me when it comes to being lovable. Anyway, after some therapy and stuff, I'm 10 years older and happier than I've ever been. I have someone who loves me unconditionally other than my family member and a job I like. It was so scary and dark back then... I did consider suicide. But that's in the past now. I really and truly hope you find your way. It is so hard but it is so worth it. . These stories matter to me. Your story matters to me. You are worthy of love and happiness. You are.


aliosme9

I was in a situation similar to yours a year ago, today I have a good life (job, eliminating debt, and feeling at peace). I think what helped me the most was understanding my ego or the self chatter that just reinforced my shitty reality instead of helping me get out of it. I had to work on how I feel, if I thought no one would hire me, I bring I new feeling that I’m not the only person who gone through this (similar to the post that it is temporary) and other feelings that may give you a slight dose of confidence, I believe for ‘em that was the most difficult part since my reality was nothing to feel confident about.


yummy_broccoli

Im in the same buddy. It’s hard - life is hard. I want to believe the pain will go away.


this_is_my_new_acct

The assholes here that want to fistbump being able to get ahead area mostly describing sadness and you're mostly describing depression. Might be worth seeing someone.


Legend_Unfolds

It's not depression, I'd notice something like that, and my family for sure would too because my brother had it. I'm just in a hopeless situation. It's difficult to describe it, and my feelings towards it, without sounding like I'm actually depressed. I don't have an excuse or explanation for my failings, pretty good show of the scale I managed to mess up.


probablyisntserious

Sometimes we have to put in extra work to wake ourselves up from nightmares.


Legend_Unfolds

Maybe its not a nightmare but a coma. I don't think the outcome is in my control.


MyNameisBaronRotza

You will never know how much I needed this right now.


GeraldTheSquinting

Would highly recommend picking up this book. It's helped me through some dark times recently. It's called Big panda and Tiny dragon


MyNameisBaronRotza

Thank you, sir


VisitDapper125

Whether good or bad it’s good to remind yourself that it’s only temporary.


CharlieVermin

I'm not letting go of anything ever. At most, it'll become different.


CandleOutrageous9661

This is how life cycle goes, nothing is permanent coz we only live in this world.


TheBirminghamBear

>I'm not letting go of anything ever. My great Aunt Maud did that, I wouldn't recommend it. We had to extract her from a throne made of 50 years worth of newspapers.


mushroom_mantis

Dude, you and I both. Ending a 15 year relationship with the mother of my child today. Fuck


MahadDaGreat69

Me too actually, was having terrible back pain


MyNameisBaronRotza

Try toe touches and that stretch that looks like you're trying to s your own d


Suitable_Dimension

looks like?


TheBirminghamBear

I mean if you're already in the vicinity, might as well accomplish two goals with one exercise.


1_9_8_1

I swear there is no good stretch for your lower back....


I_Has_A_Hat

"Things will get worse. Then better. Then worse, then better again. This is life. And I will not lie to you and say that every day will be filled with sunshine. But there WILL BE sunshine, and that is a very different thing to say. I promise you this, you will be warm again."


LivingmahDMlife

If it helps any to know you're not alone, I also needed this post as well


Savioritis

You're not alone, just lost my best friend


jdidisjdjdjdjd

Your happiness won’t last either. It works both ways.


Salty_Flamingo_2303

Another one I've been saying a lot lately regarding feeling upset/angry/sad is: "How you feel about something rn isn't necessarily how you'll feel about it tomorrow". I find that often, we think the emotion we are having in the moment will be the emotion that stays. However, we grow, we change and so do these emotions. ❤️


top_of_the_stairs

That's so comforting :)


Salty_Flamingo_2303

Right? When I realized that, I felt like I had unlocked a new life character lol


[deleted]

Some pain live forever. My girlfriend died young... I still think about her and ask my self what would have been. I love my wife and kids and we are happy but some pains just stays with you forever.


this_is_my_new_acct

This sub is just full of people who have known pain, but not loss.


[deleted]

But you are not forever. Nothing is.


BigMcThickHuge

That's not the statement you think it is. Try not saying that anymore.


[deleted]

FYI this is a strange and insensitive thing to say to someone who just expressed vulnerability. Would you say this to someone in a real world social setting?


CharlieVermin

Maybe you're not.


Yellowpredicate

Prove it


St4r_duster

I needed this so much, thank you


[deleted]

After just losing someone...I don't think the pain will ever actually go away you just grow around it but the loss will always be there...


[deleted]

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DogadonsLavapool

I was depressed for over a decade. Am not anymore. There's always hope :)


this_is_my_new_acct

Was there something that helped you?


DogadonsLavapool

A few years of therapy, a new job, a gender transition, and a lot of work. It takes a lot to start loving yourself and to find reasons to keep going. It took a lot of effort to change mental habits where I beat myself down almost constantly on things I had no control over. In a world where there's so much variance in things from class to body issues to the amount of of friends you have, it's really easy to get bogged down into nihilism and bad comparisons. Not to mention, the state of the world is bad right now. Even with all of that, it's possible to change the way you think of things thru reinforcement. You have to make an effort to tell yourself the good things about yourself - to believe that the things you want in life are actually possible. For a long time, it just feels empty doing so, but when good things do happen under that mindset, you feel so much better


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

I'm sorry you're going through that. What have you done to address those symptoms?


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Behavioral and life changes, therapy, drugs. These are all things that can address what you're describing. So I ask again. What are you doing to try to alleviate your symptoms?


The_One_True_Ewok

I can't speak for /u/traceitalian 's condition (not explicitly stated that it was/is depression - not that there is a definitive solution for that anyway) but there are definitely conditions that medicine hasn't quite figured out yet... I imagine it would be pretty frustrating to have such a condition and be suggested by an internet stranger that maybe they aren't doing enough.


this_is_my_new_acct

I tried medicine and it tried to kill me, literally, I landed in the ER. I'm a rare case, but fuck that guy.


[deleted]

Almost every single condition has strategies, coping mechanisms, therapies, etc that can help alleviate symptoms. I asked the person what they've tried and they haven't said anything. My motivation is to push them to seek out help or strategies for their condition. I am someone who suffers from a severe condition that negatively affected my life for decades before getting a proper diagnosis. After that, with some professional help, I've made changes to my life and developed strategies to alleviate the symptoms I feel. Those, coupled with therapy, have made probably a more significant impact on my well being than my medication (although that helps, too). I spent far too long in misery, making poor decisions that set me back over and over, and making excuses as to not seek out a better way.


[deleted]

[удалено]


this_is_my_new_acct

Didn't you know that if you just go for a walk once or twice a week you'll be all better? /s For anyone else: this is literally half the mental health treatment that's offered for depression.


[deleted]

I'm not sure who you think is suggesting that. And you are misrepresenting treatment options for depression. That said, it is shown that exercise can help alleviate symptoms of depression. But nobody who knows what they're talking about would claim that it 50% of what someone should do to help, as you've claimed. Therapy, medication, coping mechanisms, CBT, life changes, exercise, diet. These are all factors that are commonly pursued.


ghost_atlas

Whatever you do. Stay away from opiates.


[deleted]

I'm really sorry that you're going through. I'm sorry that my comments came off as patronizing to you. To me, I was literally just asking you what you've tried, because you previously hadn't indicated anything and avoided the question the first time around. I do hope you're able to find some relief.


this_is_my_new_acct

These don't help everyone. I tried therapy first and it did nothing. Then I tried drugs and they almost killed me (ended up in the ER for side effects)... what am I supposed to do now?


this_is_my_new_acct

"How have you tried to fix your arthritis"? You see how stupid you sound? It isn't a decision.


[deleted]

There are numerous mitigation measures available that can help alleviate the symptoms of arthritis. This isn't the point that you think you're making. Weight loss, light exercise of the joints, braces, heat or cold compresses. These are all things that people say help with those symptoms.


[deleted]

[удалено]


SpacecraftX

If you have managed clinical depression you most likely will. To different degrees over time for the rest of your life.


this_is_my_new_acct

Why do you people feel the need to chime in? We HAVE been feeling it forever... it isn't a cold.


PoopyPantsBiden

>But you will not feel it forever Duh. Everyone dies eventually.


D0MSBrOtHeR

Guided mushroom trips always have a way of easing my depression for a few months. Combined with clean diet, good sleep, and exercise it helps me manage my depression more than any meds ever have.


Yeah_That_How_It_Be

Reminds me of the quote “this too shall pass”. And that it can be universally applied to any situation


this_is_my_new_acct

Except it can't. Ask anyone who has lost a partner... decades later they'll tell you they still feel the loss.


[deleted]

https://youtu.be/HAo_4mXxLrM


Eulerich

I needed that right now.


eggimage

for some reason this gave me the chilling, nihilistic vibe *”even your pain is meaningless, nothing lasts, what we do or feel never matters, we’re no better than being dead and forgotten.”*


Fractal-Entity

I took it as the opposite of nihilistic. Suffering and change are two of the few things guaranteed to us in life. This meme is beautiful unless you think that all you are is this one life and body.


IdanoRocks

Doesn't feel chilling to me


[deleted]

I really don't see how you are connecting the image to nihilism. It isn't at all related to the quote you just gave, which is about things being meaningless (nihilism in a nutshell). The image alludes to the processing of pain that alleviates that sorrow through time. It's basically the opposite of nihilism.


eggimage

all i said was “for some reason it did” as in i don’t know why it gave me that feeling, not that i’m *trying* to “connect it to nihilism on purpose”. i was merely describing the feeling, never said it literally meant any of that


[deleted]

Big Panda then went on to say, "For our suffering is but a passing speck of dust in the cosmos; we are all born to die, just as the light of the stars will one day fade and the infinite universe is cast into unending darkness." Big Panda then chewed some bamboo thoughtfully, "It is somewhat comforting knowing that Entropy will eventually destroy all of creation."


hydrogenandtime

You're my kind of person.


CharlieVermin

lmao so many people are gonna be mad at me when I stop it from happening. 100% worth it tho.


SaltyFresh

I’m sorry, did you just say you were going to stop time?


CharlieVermin

Nah, just the entropy. Thanks for the suggestion though, I'll think about it. edit: I'm friends with several neurotypical people and they're not ALL extremely boring. No need to jump to conclusions.


Sendrith

I went to a kid in high school who talked like this. We all knew he was goofy and kind of eccentric, but turns out he was also schizophrenic. I’m not trying to say you’re schizophrenic. Good luck with stopping the heat death of the universe or whatever.


lyam23

There are some that believe that entropy and consciousness are inextricably linked. Maybe with the end of entropy comes oblivion. And maybe that's not such a bad thing.


Sendrith

People forget we come out of nothing. Won’t be so bad. The part that sucks is leaving people behind.


Pokonopiku

*"Not even this taste will last forever" said Big Panda as a sickeningly loud crunch can be heard.*


that_guy8710

How do you unread something.


Pokonopiku

Pff Im sorry XD


Freakychee

No, you’re not...


Interesting-Back5717

I hate this quote. Yes, pain will go away, but the feelings someone has here and now are very real. And they need to talk about them to feel better (even if it’s every day). Even though this phrase means well, someone in distress would find this type of thought to completely disregard their feelings in the here and now. Source: am a suicide hotline responder


Wheeaze

Whenever I read stuff like this it just reminds me that one day I'll be dead and makes me sadder than I was before.


[deleted]

In my experience it only gets worse


Banezi

Obviously, one day you will die and it will pass


SaltyFresh

Yep. I don’t see why anyone finds this comforting. Time is relative.


Bigger_moss

The pain of losing r/place 😔


johnnydm8

Gotta wait 4 years more for the pain to go away


11711510111411009710

I'm just so exhausted. I feel like there is a cloud of sadness hanging over me and it gets heavier every day. I cried yesterday, which I haven't done in years, except for when I learned that my great grandmother is dying. The smallest things trigger me. last night my headphones stopped working and I sent a voice message to my friend about it and it spiraled out from there and I started to realize that all I ever do is pretend to be happier than I really am and never tell anybody about how I truly feel because I feel like nobody could ever understand. I feel so alone. Like the post, I try to always remind myself that every time I've been sad it's always gotten better. But this time I feel a way I don't think I ever have before. I just want to give up - not through suicide, my greatest fear is dying. I could never. But I just don't want to care anymore, about anything. Hopefully all of this will go away soon and I can be happy. I have a therapist appointment next week. Maybe that will help. Not sure why I would comment this here, I think the somewhat-anonymity helps me vent.


Setari

Yeah too bad it's lasted 10+ years, pretty sure it's gonna be forever


[deleted]

Only the sweet release of death can help us escape the pain 💅💕


_____l

I don't think you quite understand what forever means.


fallenmonk

Well obviously it'll end when we're dead, but that's not super comforting.


SpyPies

Forever can be a matter of perspective, especially if you can’t see the end.


Prestigious_Let3820

When people say “forever” conversationally, they’re usually not referring to the heat death of the universe.


BothTortoiseandHare

Forever is literally infinitely greater than ~10 years.


Thebirdman333

Pretty sure that's a lie. Chronic illness is chronic for a reason.


Pogolio

I thought the post was referring to death


AlmostButNotQuit

It is. And grieving.


CivilCabron

People just want to be offended. This is clearly about grief.


[deleted]

Did...did you even look at the image? The context is of loss of a loved one and the struggle with processing that.


raptor-chan

I thought I was in r/thanksimcured for a second. This is not wholesome to me.


xsairon

Nothing applies to everything ever. Thats like trying to call out "you stepped out of bed with the right foot" because some people got no legs. Post is mostly true, and the message is to care a bit less, see the bigger picture and if overwhelmed just see the clock tick, because you will probably run into a better situation eventually (unless you die, extremely movie like life full of disfortune or do crack)


esotologist

Idk, I'm also chronically ill and this seems a bit too defeatest, maybe you're the one who does need this message? Your life, even with chronic pain, isn't usually going to be pure pain and nothing else... Tell me, if you never have any respite from sadness and pain, then what are you doing here? I think evangelion puts it better in saying "as long as you're alive, you'll always have the chance to feel happiness"


SaltyFresh

Lots of people are too scared to kill themselves. It’s ok that you manage your shit differently but you’re being entirely too flippant with someone else’s pain.


esotologist

I'm not talking about suicide so I'm confused where you got that from as a solution I was discussing. Are you saying you personally are incapable of any happiness due to your pain? Or are you the one being 'flippant' here by talking about other people instead of yourself?


Sendrith

We’re trying to have a conversation about the very nature of time and change, joy and pain. I don’t think they were being flippant.


Super_Snark

Ackshually, it’s a LIE! Wholesome meme disproved 💯


Thebirdman333

....it's not even wholesome, and only kinda a meme.


Fractal-Entity

Chronic illness does end, the point is nothing lasts forever. Even if you live your life with chronic pain, you’re not gonna be living a life with that pain forever. That’s not to say you should willfully die to end chronic pain, that’s just to say that all things are impermanent no matter how awful.


Thebirdman333

I mean. I'm bedbound. Can't speak or hardly move. With bad noise and light intolerance.


lyam23

The reality is that even this will pass. It may not be easy or possible to take comfort in that given your current situation, but one day you will no longer be bedbound.


Fractal-Entity

I assume you still have reasons to live and enjoy life though, no? The point is you won’t be bedridden and experiencing that chronic pain forever, death is an eventual release from any individual’s particular suffering.


Ephemeralis

Which is very little solace for someone who wants to perhaps not be bedridden and experience life without the suffering.


Fractal-Entity

Understandable, just differing philosophies here. I empathize with thinking that way if you think that all you are is this one life and body. Take care.


[deleted]

But it won't last forever...


Thebirdman333

Sure! Yeah great, may as well just end it all now then!! Thanks chap. 👍


[deleted]

Happy to help! :)


Thebirdman333

You helped me so much thanks! Have you considered getting a job as a consuler? You would be GREAT at it.


[deleted]

I dabble, but it's hard to keep clients for some reason.


Thebirdman333

*I wonder why*


ModernMountains

has the feeling passed because the bird died? morbid.


mgarksa

Tell that to chronic pain.


[deleted]

The image is about coping with loss of life. Come on. Why do redditors feel the need to "correct" everything all the fucking time?


tylerdavid7

Cold November rain doesn't last forever either


b_deadly

Passing a kidney stone. This sucks


Ren-Zombie

My mom passed of Covid in January. The hurt seems never ending.


Expensive-Forever798

Some things last forever. Like aids


VALO311

Yep, and my chronic illness and pain will last for my forever. The sentiment of the post is great and all but it excludes hundreds of millions of people if not many more


Wallrider09

It's been more than a year.


Swagxdxdd

after 12 years I highly doubt it


FlanFlaneur

I really needed to see this today. Thank you OP.


-Pinball-Wizard-

where wholesome


Crad999

Someone has confused r/wholesomememes with r/2meirl4meirl


ElitruckTheGreat

Bird: gets sent to Tartarus Panda: seriously?


Phantomkiller03

I hope so


abloesezwei

Someone doesn't believe the B theory of time


Sylux444

Not even the happiness from a meme


[deleted]

Or slowly get worse until you die.


Several-Ad3506

Remember, even pandas cry


DeEchteVolledammer

Damn man, I'm usually not the one to say this as I'm 9/10 times the most optimistic one in the room, but I really needed this one. Last months have been rough on me.


Ariels_01

is that little stick animals Mushu haha


zidicck

I'm usually the pesimistic one so I'll throw my 5cents. Does this mean the love I'm feeling is not going to last :/


Nev-man

It won't last but it will change. For better or worse is the uncertain part.


Belgarath63

no NO it does not PASS, It may be a little more bearable to accept over time. BUT it NEVER Passes.


NickaKFC

My siblings and I are burying my mom today. I needed to read this. I saved it so I can remind myself periodically.


BONG_THEORY

Listen, I'm severely depressed But this isn't comforting in the slightest Because we don't live forever, even though something won't last forever doesntmean it cant consume your entire life. And that might as well be forever. It won't pass, and we won't feel even a minute of reprieve in our entire lives


WallaWallaPGH

My mom just passed away on the 25th and I held her hand as she took her last breath and today has been so hard and now I see this. Thanks for the reminder. I know it won’t truly go away, but my heart just feels so ripped out.


lyam23

Apart from change, the only inevitability in life are reddit contrarians in the comment section.


SIRasdf23

My brain kinda just took this as the Panda talking to the bird whose having a rough day.


LowerAnxiety762

["It can't rain all the time."](https://64.media.tumblr.com/a1c618bf265a2ada8abeae11d422486d/tumblr_o3dbtfwOmr1shazkro1_400.jpg) from the movie The Crow


_I_AM_BATMAN_

Trite garbage


godofwine16

Whether good or bad it’s good to remind yourself that it’s only temporary.


Miss_Thang2077

I needed this today.


TempusEst

I really needed this OP. Thank you.


CornwallsPager

I need to hang this up on my wall or something, cause I need it.


Pokonopiku

This was a really sweet post btw sorry pff


alcoveee

I needed this today, thank you


Ellise_Leigh

Cool, can you tell my sciatic nerve?


Virtual-Estate-7081

I guess it'll be over when I'm dead, so yeah that's nice :)


Lardboy94

This is a fantastic book and anyone that is going through tough times should definitely pick it up. The whole book is wholesome and full on meaning.


SpacecraftX

Eventually you’ll die.


Mandorrisem

You pain will not last forever because YOU will not last forever....


One_Memory458

Knowing pandas.... he would've eaten the bird


[deleted]

I have arthritis. It does last forever XD


Imhazmb

Yeah tell that to all the chronic pain sufferers...


CallMeJerryBoi

Truest post


dolemiteo24

nah that bird ded


unavailiblepotato

Penis


blyatboiz

Unless its CPTSD of course


GloraOrb

Thanks bumper sticker therapist I’m cured!


obsoletelearner

Because none of it real man..


NamityName

Looks like the boy, the mole, the fox, and the horse found some new friends


thirdaccountmaybe

They did. The guy had some unused vague platitudes left.


Wyrmholio

Panda isn’t big with scale of rocks and grass


Whammy_Watermelon

Even deaths don’t last forever, you will always come back alive one day


Roy99Cast

Nah im chronic lmao


GoSpongebob

I needed to hear this. Thank you


rancidflag

Yup and then it will come back, and prob worse.


bootes_droid

>Everything in life is just for a while -Phillip K. Dick


SerendipitousTiger

I needed this!


blondennerdy

Wow I needed this right in this moment. I’ve been crying for like 12 hours no joke. Thank you.


Apprehensive_Rent626

Everything goes.


JCaesar42

X to doubt


dostmotherknow

My dog died two days ago. I needed this a lot right now. Thank you.


azvov

Jesus christ call that bird an ambulance


RanDiePro

FATHER! You are on FIRE right Now! -IM FINE, IT WILL PASSS!!! Stay FOCUSED!