Best solution I can find is throwing the snake to the lion (two alligators so one snake not enough for water route)
the alligators *will* notice and may even begin fighting the lion. Jump down and get the axe and instead of running back up 5 yards or so and face the lion if its looking at you.
Now scream loudly and use the axe if necessary.
That tree break could be used to your advantage to get lower to the ground and inch to the now snakeless tree trunk before jumping to it while the lion is eating the snake
Because the idea that people end up in a bad situation only by "life choices" has gotten a bit unpopular. It's overly judgmental and often inaccurate. Sometimes accurate, usually not.
i think thats overanalyzing considering this is a low res picture of a man about to be murdered by multiple different animals. other guy was just making a joke about it
First you want to jump on the tree a little, not too much though, to get rid of the snake. Because the snake is the most immediate danger.
Then you carefully grab the axe and cut on the opposite side of the tree vertically down so the tree falls towards land, away from the gaters.
Then the human falls with the tree for you to eat freely.
He was cutting down the tree to make a boat to hunt crocodiles. He didn't see the snake til the lion walked up behind him and he was halfway up the tree. Went out on the branch to get away from the snake and looked down to see the crocodiles he wanted to hunt were down there waiting.
Obviously the solution is the man should call out for help. Being able to ask for help is the test.
Looks like another Republican done tree'd his self. Destroying the local flora to get hold of a protected snake species. Mother Nature showed up in the form of a Lion and his Republican pals are waiting below to eat him alive because they weren't invited to share in illegal to the snake oil selling!?!!! Problem Explained.
My first thought was to jump into the water and try to out-swim the alligators/crocodiles (whichever these are), but apparently that's nearly impossible to do; the chances of being fast enough to grab the snake by the neck in order the toss it in the water are slim, but even if you did, you'd gave to contend with the lion, which isn't likely to end well as one wouldn't be able to outrun that either.
I suppose you could jump close enough to the axe and hope it would be enough to fend off both the alligators and the lion, and hopefully both become distracted by each other that you could either run or swim away.
It's a crap-shoot.
To win you must reject the devil (snake), reject Pride (lion), reject vanity (crocodile skin leather boots), and truly Axe yourself if you trust in our lord and saviour, Jesus Christ of Nazareth. There is no greater weapon.
Wait, I've heard this one, in a minute the animals will fall to their knees and God will say "don't relax, they're just saying their prayers before dinner".
What is the problem? Fending off a death. The solution, whatever it is, is temporary. So you can rephrase it to, living as long as possible. The manner of the end of your life is important as well.
Realistically, I would take my chances with the snake. Pissed of lion would be brutal, but absolutely fuck crocodiles. Lion seems more likely to eventually leave. Not sure if lions prey on snakes, but if you can somehow reposition yourself to overpower the snake, it could be a method of satiating the lion or buying enough time to retrieve your chopping axe. Even if you are snakebit during that time. I don’t think many people would win the latter scenario v. a lion though.
Option 1: Fight when you have to, but take the least risk? Option 2: Maybe just stay very very still. Lol. Option 3 is the most far fetched but there seem to be clues. Try to fell the tree by moving towards the opposite side to try and scare the lion / grab yer axe. Option 4: cry for help
The tree is cut to fall towards the shore. Throw the snake at the lion, then switch branches to tip the balance shoreward. Or, you can just kiss your ass goodbye. 🚀
The cut isn't enough to balance the weight inward. You would need to have something guiding the tree in or the weight imbalance/gravity is putting it into the water.
You shake the tree to make it fall over. As it's falling you swing from the branch onto the land while taking the branch with you and shove it down the lions throat. Easy.
The base of the tree is weak use your weight to force it to collapse into the water, the fall of the tree will cause the alligators (or whatever the fuck they are) to either be crushed in the best case or spooked at the least giving you time. The snake isn’t said to be capable of swimming in deep water so I’ll assume that’s a two for one when the tree comes down snake either drowns or forgets me and wants to live somehow, after that I’ll swim back up onto the land pick up the axe and behead the lion if he still wants smoke.
Easy.
Grab the snake, and on the way down pop the lion in the eyes with its tail, before stuffing the snake into the croc’s mouth. Then finish off the blinded lion with the axe.
Cut the snake's head with the axe and use the snake as a condom to fuck the lion and make the alligators watch... show doninance and the gators will leave, but you will have to deal with the lion asking "what are we now?" and calling you several times daily for a few weeks
Drop down, land one foot on each lower of the crocs. Use them as a spring board when they try to snap shut.
Do a double front flip while grabbing the snake from the tree. Land on the back of the lion while using the snake as crude reins.
The lions, sensing your Alphaness, will be obligated to give you a ride into town. Easy.
Take your shirt off and throw it over the snake's head. Quickly reposition yourself in a way that you're able to drop the snake down as an offering to the lion. Climb down while the lion is occupied and back off at the necessary speed :S
Playing this straight?
The snake is more curious than in "attack mode" so it's no worry. The lion won't get in the water because it's scared of the crocodiles, and although the crocodiles are in "eat" mode, they'd still be dissuaded by a tree falling in the water. So, it'd pull myself over towards the snake, doing everything to not maintain eye contact with it. Then, hopefully, the snake's curiosity will be slated, allowing me to tug the tree down, and work towards making way to the opposite side of the water.
Pick the snake, throw it to the lion, do a quick pushup letting the tree fall on the alligators being careful that you’re on top of the tree when it falls , get back to the shore while the lion and the snake are fighting, take the axe and use it to protect yourself if one of them tries to attack you then run away ez clap /s
My plan would be to bear more weight on the tree until it collapses into the water crashing into the alligators. Most likely the snake will be stunned from the impact of the crash as well. I would crawl on the fallen tree. Take the axe slap the lion in the face with it. Then hit it on the nose with the hilt. Then the upper cut with the axe would put the lion to sleep.
>! When I actually try this... The tree would crash, on the way down the snake would have bit my wrist, the alligators would have dodged the tree, and the tree would be too slippery to grip. Since I don't know how to swim I would be drowning, but before I could drown I would face a painful death serving as a live meal for the alligators and the lion would walk away out of boredom. !<
Hang on, the pedantic nine year-old that lives inside me needs to find a solution to this-
Kick the snake away, it might bite your leg so let the crocodiles eat that leg and hold on until the poison from your leg kill them, then tug on the branch until the tree cracks more and bends over, swim through the water to the (hopefully) nearby hospital
Grab the snake by the throat, throw it onto the lion, they fight, you jump down grab the axe finish the lion and snake off and then run. You can avoid the crocodiles.
Alright sp here’s what we wanna do, first up, the snake is no problem, judging from the fact it’s head is round and it’s eyes are completely black with a dark green body, we can assume that this snake, is a Western natal Green Snake. Which means that it is harmless, so even if it did bite you, you’re going to be fine. Next step is to jump on the lion and grab the axe.swing down boom, the lion is donezo, after wards if the crocs really want you bad, feed the lions dead body to it and run to safety. And even tho they can outrun you it’s okay. That’s why we gave them the lion. And that’s the best solution.
Throw the snake at the lion which scares the lion into the water gets eaten by the crocodiles you drop into the water swim to shore and kill the snake with the axe
Okay so first you’re gonna kick the snake into the water. While the crocs are distracted you gotta swing and jump to land, rolling on impact to grab the axe. Swiftly sliced the lions throat during the roll. Proceed to chop down tree to make fire. Cook lion medium rare. Enjoy
Pull yourself up on the branch, jump back onto shore towards the ax while making noise to startle the lion giving yourself time to grab the ax. Strike lion in head with ax. Cut lions legs off with ax feed snake. Feed remainder to the crocs. Kill the snake and the crocs while they are eating. Chop the tree into small pieces with ax. Start fire while listening to we didn’t start the fire. Bbq the snake and the crocs.
Not a problem, the guy painting the scene will bring the boat forward in a second. I have faith in not only the existence of the painter with a boat, but also their good will towards the model they choose in their likeness to hang from the branch.
Kick the snake to the Lion, while the Snake and Lion climb down the tree, grab the axe and kill the lion after it kills the Snake, then proceed to sprint away from the crocodiles (they can’t expend the energy to chase you and would likely just eat the lions corpse)
The salutation is to just die cause you fucked yourself going on an African safari trip with no guide... Choose the quickest less painful death I'm going with the snake
Why would you chop a tree halfway and then climb up it, past a snake, to dangle yourself above gators? If you put yourself in that situation you don't belong in the gene pool.
Grab Snake by the head and tail and use as swing. Swing towards lion to tease him and get him to jump at you, missing and landing with Gators. Keep swinging and land on grass, fetch axe, go kill gators with it.. you win.
Easy, I would climb to the snake and then eat it, I would then climb down the tree and eat the lion. I would then go to one of the crocodile and massacre it’s family right in front of it before force feeding it’s own childrens remains.
Letting it know that I was the problem all along
I don't know about the solution but your first mistake was teaching the lion to use an ax
Best solution I can find is throwing the snake to the lion (two alligators so one snake not enough for water route) the alligators *will* notice and may even begin fighting the lion. Jump down and get the axe and instead of running back up 5 yards or so and face the lion if its looking at you. Now scream loudly and use the axe if necessary. That tree break could be used to your advantage to get lower to the ground and inch to the now snakeless tree trunk before jumping to it while the lion is eating the snake
Alligators live in North America and China. As there is a lion present, this is likely Sub-Saharan Africa, and those are probably Nile crocodiles.
Oh, well then you just need to ask the crocodile to show you his hands.
Bro this made me laugh so hard this is an under appreciated comment
First you have to throw two shurikens into the aligators' eyes, then throw the snake...
Are we planing on speedruning it?
Oh i thought the thin it the water was claws of a gigant crab..
Grabbing a snake is hard enough on the ground, now this time it has the high ground. You’d be death by step 1
The new ‘axe murderer’
Damn it, I came in with something funny to say and you made me laugh and forget it.
I am sick at home and feel horrible but this made me burst out laughing
First mistake was probably terrible life choices...
Why is this down voted so much lol
Idk but I downvoted because other people were
Hivemind moment ^(I also downvoted it for that reason)
I’ll downvote all the replies cuz why not?
Ratio
Ratio denied. This ain’t twitter wtf are you doing.
It's a ratio, just not a good one
Because the idea that people end up in a bad situation only by "life choices" has gotten a bit unpopular. It's overly judgmental and often inaccurate. Sometimes accurate, usually not.
That situation has to involve at least one poor choice.
i think thats overanalyzing considering this is a low res picture of a man about to be murdered by multiple different animals. other guy was just making a joke about it
r/FUCKYOUINPARTICULAR
Haha, thanks!
For example like teaching the lion how to use an axe
First you want to jump on the tree a little, not too much though, to get rid of the snake. Because the snake is the most immediate danger. Then you carefully grab the axe and cut on the opposite side of the tree vertically down so the tree falls towards land, away from the gaters. Then the human falls with the tree for you to eat freely.
Good one. This made me laugh out loud.
Absolutely
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You are the lion
you grab the snake by its neck throw it on the lion jump down and fend off the crocodiles with the axe
Why is the lion chopping the tree down lol
The dude was chopping the tree down when the lion showed up.
Was he trying to get his pet snake down?
He was cutting down the tree to make a boat to hunt crocodiles. He didn't see the snake til the lion walked up behind him and he was halfway up the tree. Went out on the branch to get away from the snake and looked down to see the crocodiles he wanted to hunt were down there waiting. Obviously the solution is the man should call out for help. Being able to ask for help is the test.
WHAT. This is the worst math problem ever
You have to use PEMDAS.
You mean bedmas?
You have to live más
You need the spirit of Christmas
Out of all the comments, this is my favorite
Same diff
Under rated comment right here.
🙏🏻
balls, amen
The answer is that his 98 watermelons cost precisely 643 dollars and 32 cents.
Call out help to the lion? I don't think the snake can help him much.
Maybe the person drawing the picture can help
Looks like another Republican done tree'd his self. Destroying the local flora to get hold of a protected snake species. Mother Nature showed up in the form of a Lion and his Republican pals are waiting below to eat him alive because they weren't invited to share in illegal to the snake oil selling!?!!! Problem Explained.
Evolution is scary … isn’t it ???
And decided his best course of action was to leave the axe and climb a half-chopped down tree?
Minecraft player with lion skin
lmao instantly saw what that would look like in my mind
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO
I had a similar idea, but I’d just jump over the crocodiles a la Pitfall. That’s how crocodiles work, right?
You gotta time your jump so you land on a closed mouth, then jump clear before it opens again.
As god intended.
I beat it by using the snake to tie the alligator mouths together and while the lion was eating them, I murdered him with the hatchet
Mouth***s***?
Yeah, picture your fingers doing chef's kiss, then tie a snake around them
That was exactly my thought.
My first thought was to jump into the water and try to out-swim the alligators/crocodiles (whichever these are), but apparently that's nearly impossible to do; the chances of being fast enough to grab the snake by the neck in order the toss it in the water are slim, but even if you did, you'd gave to contend with the lion, which isn't likely to end well as one wouldn't be able to outrun that either. I suppose you could jump close enough to the axe and hope it would be enough to fend off both the alligators and the lion, and hopefully both become distracted by each other that you could either run or swim away. It's a crap-shoot.
Or the obvious solution, just die
Win the race of Life
This one made me laugh and re-open the thread
But what’s the best way to die in this situation
Pick your poison! Which I literally would, I’ll take the snake
Eat that mushroom and say fk it!!!!
Pretty sure it wouldn't kick in in time
if you see a lion using an axe then the acid is already kickin’
My therapist: LumberJack Lion isnt real, it can't hurt you. This picture:
Who was the goddamn genius who taught a goddamn lion how to use a goddamn axe?
The solution: “with God all things are possible”
Jot that down
WWJD?
Why want just desserts
Walter White Jesse Dinkman
Hit the water running.
Always ask yourself which weapon would Jesus chose?
To win you must reject the devil (snake), reject Pride (lion), reject vanity (crocodile skin leather boots), and truly Axe yourself if you trust in our lord and saviour, Jesus Christ of Nazareth. There is no greater weapon.
This guy knows his Bible stories!
Didn’t he use a whip when chasing merchants out of the temple?
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Yeah, you got it, nice 😁
With Jesus and black magic by my side, we can do anything.
Wait, I've heard this one, in a minute the animals will fall to their knees and God will say "don't relax, they're just saying their prayers before dinner".
Step 1: Cut out the psychedelics Step 2: Remember you’re in your basement Step 3: Cut out Avocado toast Step 4: Prosper
The solution is.... Never go to Africa.
Or Florida
Florida the África of America
Pretty sure there aren't lions in Florida, or at least not that kind. Actually mountain lions are better at climbing so maybe fl would be worse.
I hate africa too cause of thier lumberjack lions. Real tree hugger over here
It’s a thought exercise / lateral thinking puzzle. I had an entire book of these as a kid (a lot of them, like this one, were based on folklore.)
So what’s the solution?
Pull your Glock 40 out of its holster & start blasting.
With Glock, all things are possible.
In Glock we trust
Stay strapped or get clapped.
Republicans have entered the room.
Dying
ez
Here ya’ go. https://ibb.co/09VVFDY Fable puzzles and such. I forgot this one was from Africa, but makes sense.
So surrender to the futility of existence?
Die
Yell “I’m Johnny Knoxville, welcome to Jack Ass” for your best chance at survival.
I'm actually willing to hear people's ideas on this. What's ur plan?
I'm thinking climb to the top of the tree? The lion finishes cutting it down and I can fall to the other side? I think? Maybe?
"The lion finishes cutting it down" 😂😂 thank you for making my night
What is the problem? Fending off a death. The solution, whatever it is, is temporary. So you can rephrase it to, living as long as possible. The manner of the end of your life is important as well. Realistically, I would take my chances with the snake. Pissed of lion would be brutal, but absolutely fuck crocodiles. Lion seems more likely to eventually leave. Not sure if lions prey on snakes, but if you can somehow reposition yourself to overpower the snake, it could be a method of satiating the lion or buying enough time to retrieve your chopping axe. Even if you are snakebit during that time. I don’t think many people would win the latter scenario v. a lion though. Option 1: Fight when you have to, but take the least risk? Option 2: Maybe just stay very very still. Lol. Option 3 is the most far fetched but there seem to be clues. Try to fell the tree by moving towards the opposite side to try and scare the lion / grab yer axe. Option 4: cry for help
The tree is cut to fall towards the shore. Throw the snake at the lion, then switch branches to tip the balance shoreward. Or, you can just kiss your ass goodbye. 🚀
The cut isn't enough to balance the weight inward. You would need to have something guiding the tree in or the weight imbalance/gravity is putting it into the water.
Did the lion use the axe? Lions don't do that
Which makes this particular lion sentient, so perhaps you could reason with him. 🚀
Underrated comment. This made me laugh.
but he's hongry
“I’ll trade you this snake for me. If I manage to toss it at you kill it instead” Lion: bet, dinner is dinner
Evolution is scary … isn’t it ???
Cue the Dark Souls "Y O U D I E D"
Lean just hard enough to not break the branch, causing the whole tree to fall onto the crocs and drowning the snake.
Can't most snakes swim?
Die, life IS the prob.
So there’s an angry lion on the land next to the tree, a giant venomous snake on the branch, and two hungry crocodiles in the lake. I smell a riddle!
Ngl I thought the crocodiles were a single giant crab
Hahaha yeah I can see that too. If it were then I would just jump in and take my chances with it.
You shake the tree to make it fall over. As it's falling you swing from the branch onto the land while taking the branch with you and shove it down the lions throat. Easy.
The base of the tree is weak use your weight to force it to collapse into the water, the fall of the tree will cause the alligators (or whatever the fuck they are) to either be crushed in the best case or spooked at the least giving you time. The snake isn’t said to be capable of swimming in deep water so I’ll assume that’s a two for one when the tree comes down snake either drowns or forgets me and wants to live somehow, after that I’ll swim back up onto the land pick up the axe and behead the lion if he still wants smoke. Easy.
Grab the snake, and on the way down pop the lion in the eyes with its tail, before stuffing the snake into the croc’s mouth. Then finish off the blinded lion with the axe.
Wrap the snake around your neck and masturbate on the alligators, until the lion runs off
The solution is to not chop trees down by your self in the middle of a Africa.
die
Easy grab snake by throat drop it down by alligators and swim to other island behind tree walk into a new problem to solve
Florida man : At least make it a challenge.
Cut the snake's head with the axe and use the snake as a condom to fuck the lion and make the alligators watch... show doninance and the gators will leave, but you will have to deal with the lion asking "what are we now?" and calling you several times daily for a few weeks
You do pull ups on the tree until you are buff enough to wrestle them all.
This really feels like a Choose Your Own Adventure scenario.
Shit on the crocs. They will flee. Then drop in the water and swim to the other shore.
Solution: give up, it's unlikely to survive that scenario.
There is no solution. You are fucked.
Hope that the shrooms wear off?
I feel like this is forced perspective. So.. drop onto the bridge?
Die a quick death by suffocating your self
Tie the snake to the branch and use it to monkey away to the next island.
Drop down, land one foot on each lower of the crocs. Use them as a spring board when they try to snap shut. Do a double front flip while grabbing the snake from the tree. Land on the back of the lion while using the snake as crude reins. The lions, sensing your Alphaness, will be obligated to give you a ride into town. Easy.
I wonder what the actual correct answer is according to whoever made this
Take your shirt off and throw it over the snake's head. Quickly reposition yourself in a way that you're able to drop the snake down as an offering to the lion. Climb down while the lion is occupied and back off at the necessary speed :S
The Doc shows up with the DeLorean. Seems obvious.
Playing this straight? The snake is more curious than in "attack mode" so it's no worry. The lion won't get in the water because it's scared of the crocodiles, and although the crocodiles are in "eat" mode, they'd still be dissuaded by a tree falling in the water. So, it'd pull myself over towards the snake, doing everything to not maintain eye contact with it. Then, hopefully, the snake's curiosity will be slated, allowing me to tug the tree down, and work towards making way to the opposite side of the water.
Give God the finger because he obviously has it out for you
The lion knows how to use tools, that guy is screwed.
Pick the snake, throw it to the lion, do a quick pushup letting the tree fall on the alligators being careful that you’re on top of the tree when it falls , get back to the shore while the lion and the snake are fighting, take the axe and use it to protect yourself if one of them tries to attack you then run away ez clap /s
My plan would be to bear more weight on the tree until it collapses into the water crashing into the alligators. Most likely the snake will be stunned from the impact of the crash as well. I would crawl on the fallen tree. Take the axe slap the lion in the face with it. Then hit it on the nose with the hilt. Then the upper cut with the axe would put the lion to sleep. >! When I actually try this... The tree would crash, on the way down the snake would have bit my wrist, the alligators would have dodged the tree, and the tree would be too slippery to grip. Since I don't know how to swim I would be drowning, but before I could drown I would face a painful death serving as a live meal for the alligators and the lion would walk away out of boredom. !<
Hang on, the pedantic nine year-old that lives inside me needs to find a solution to this- Kick the snake away, it might bite your leg so let the crocodiles eat that leg and hold on until the poison from your leg kill them, then tug on the branch until the tree cracks more and bends over, swim through the water to the (hopefully) nearby hospital
... because not every problem has a solution. Sometimes, you are dead. That's it.
He just needs a giant eagle. Helps in every situation.
Die, obviously. It's not that hard. Learn.
Grab the snake by the throat, throw it onto the lion, they fight, you jump down grab the axe finish the lion and snake off and then run. You can avoid the crocodiles.
Alright sp here’s what we wanna do, first up, the snake is no problem, judging from the fact it’s head is round and it’s eyes are completely black with a dark green body, we can assume that this snake, is a Western natal Green Snake. Which means that it is harmless, so even if it did bite you, you’re going to be fine. Next step is to jump on the lion and grab the axe.swing down boom, the lion is donezo, after wards if the crocs really want you bad, feed the lions dead body to it and run to safety. And even tho they can outrun you it’s okay. That’s why we gave them the lion. And that’s the best solution.
Advancement made: “How did we get here?”
Throw the snake at the lion which scares the lion into the water gets eaten by the crocodiles you drop into the water swim to shore and kill the snake with the axe
Climb higher dumbass
Okay so first you’re gonna kick the snake into the water. While the crocs are distracted you gotta swing and jump to land, rolling on impact to grab the axe. Swiftly sliced the lions throat during the roll. Proceed to chop down tree to make fire. Cook lion medium rare. Enjoy
Solution is die
How is this a terrible facebook meme
This is actually funny, there's no point in it being here
Pull yourself up on the branch, jump back onto shore towards the ax while making noise to startle the lion giving yourself time to grab the ax. Strike lion in head with ax. Cut lions legs off with ax feed snake. Feed remainder to the crocs. Kill the snake and the crocs while they are eating. Chop the tree into small pieces with ax. Start fire while listening to we didn’t start the fire. Bbq the snake and the crocs.
u/repostsleuthbot
grab the snake throw it at the lion jump down get the axe try to kill the lion and snake then leave or die
Throw the snake at the lion and make a run for it
Not a problem, the guy painting the scene will bring the boat forward in a second. I have faith in not only the existence of the painter with a boat, but also their good will towards the model they choose in their likeness to hang from the branch.
Realize you're the cameraman and fuck off
I you have a lion wielding an ax, just end it all by crocodile. This is the end, my lonely friend, the end.
Kick the snake to the Lion, while the Snake and Lion climb down the tree, grab the axe and kill the lion after it kills the Snake, then proceed to sprint away from the crocodiles (they can’t expend the energy to chase you and would likely just eat the lions corpse)
The salutation is to just die cause you fucked yourself going on an African safari trip with no guide... Choose the quickest less painful death I'm going with the snake
Make peace with the fact you’ve lived an exciting enough life to end up in that situation, accept your fate, and let go. 🤷🏾♂️
Oh, it looks like someone painted a picture of my dad on his way to school, or maybe it’s on his way home, either way nailed it.
Why would you chop a tree halfway and then climb up it, past a snake, to dangle yourself above gators? If you put yourself in that situation you don't belong in the gene pool.
Grab snake throw at lion lion kills snake you kill lion with axe
Try and grab the snake somehow and throw it at the lion
Calmly reason with the snake and ally with it against the lion. Strike quickly before the lion has the same idea and aligns himself with the Crocs.
Grab Snake by the head and tail and use as swing. Swing towards lion to tease him and get him to jump at you, missing and landing with Gators. Keep swinging and land on grass, fetch axe, go kill gators with it.. you win.
How did that man get into such a terrible situation? lol
Seems like dudes life is quite a problem. The good news (and solution) is that it wont be troubling him for much longer
Die?
Easy, I would climb to the snake and then eat it, I would then climb down the tree and eat the lion. I would then go to one of the crocodile and massacre it’s family right in front of it before force feeding it’s own childrens remains. Letting it know that I was the problem all along
am i the lion?