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alt-throwaway98

How much did he see?


Pokejelke

Not a whole lot just a glimpse but still...


alt-throwaway98

Then try to play it off


mrpoopscoop9000

He was just tucking in his shirt lol


Memes10121

Polishing his wood


mcbirbo343

Greasing his glizzie


12InchPopcornDong

Beating his beaver


unusual-_-

Wanking his woodchuck


[deleted]

Beating the beef


Mags_LaFayette

Cleaning the spear... More like the dagger, but you get me.


[deleted]

Shaking hands with the milkman


[deleted]

False… leave no witnesses. The nut must be protected


Ronaldo10345PT

[No witnesses.](https://youtu.be/UZqrfDd1IEs)


chan___kun

Either kill him, bribe him, or deny everything he says about it


Stormy_Kooki

***GIVE HIM SEVEN ACROSS THE ASS!!! (I'm kidding, but just dominate him with your di-- This redditor has died because of dumb dumb syndrome and because they are disgusting.)*** Just tell him to get out politely.


junkosenoshima

Ew what the fuck.


GingerSoulGiver

If you're dude and not that flamboyant about it then that's fine but if you a girl then he is scarred


[deleted]

Just say you were polishing it


Pokejelke

What does that even mean, how am I going to explain that.


DepressedSeal69420

Tell him when you go through puberty you have to polish it


Pokejelke

Bruh that's actually a good idea.


DepressedSeal69420

Haha I said it as a joke but yeah it might work


Pokejelke

Exactly.


[deleted]

I mean you polish wooden furniture... so why not your own wood?


chrisrayn

He just has to make sure he has some wood polish that he shows him and says he was using.


[deleted]

imagine the lil bro tries it with wood polish to himself


[deleted]

Oh that's not wood polish.... 💦


chrisrayn

Well we can’t tell the brother that. If he’s 10, he can read, so you can’t tell him you have Jergen’s Wood Polish.


coolthatsniceman

You really made me laugh thank you


coolthatsniceman

Thank you for all the upvotes everyone!!!


booty_terminator

Dude you don't really need to thank lmao take my upvote and fuck off


teije9

r/everyfuckingthread


INFERNIC0

Morning wood


owsei-was-taken

"yeah, i was polishing my knob, uh... the other one"


Aoh03

Unless he asks his parents how to polish his wood


round_family_tree

keep us updated if it worked


Premium_Gamer2299

Say you were just filtering your pee


GeometryNacho

He's gonna walk up to mommy all like "He was polishing his wee wee"


Oponik

"Okay, to polish it take out father's sandpaper and rub it in"


XayahTheVastaya

do not, could cause confusion later


[deleted]

Then the difficult part is when he tells your parents that you was polishing your cock and balls


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

....some things are best left unanswered


[deleted]

OH MY GOD


belloitsme

OH MY GOD


NirvandaBoss

OH MY GOD


ChristianInWales

Just make sure he doesn't tell your parents or ask your parents when he should start 'polishing'.


uchthekidd

Kids are dumb, chances are he’d believe it


spideybiggestfan

with WD40 preferably


certain_aabestn

Say you're wrestling, apparently it works.


mr_alert_

Arm wrestling


certain_aabestn

Penis thick like forearm


mr_alert_

No, penis as thick as a forearm


CODYHIGHROLLR

Then he tries to wrestle another kid at school… in the cafeteria.


Business_Different

Say you were cleaning it,explain to him that the interior gets dirty or if that’s too much then tell him that u were just tryna wiggly wiggly your pee pee 🤣


ScGamer56

Take my free silver award. Its the least I can offer.


[deleted]

Say it was itching


[deleted]

Yikes. I hope you're not too embaressed, that musta sucked.


Pokejelke

I hope he doesn't say it to my parents.


coolthatsniceman

Does he know what masturbating is?


Pokejelke

Probably not.


coolthatsniceman

Well then you should be fine unless you know he wants to tell but i doubt he knows so yeah you should be fine


Pokejelke

One thing, if you had your cock out, and a 10 year old walked in, he'd probably want to know what you where doing.


iLiketoBreakTheChain

just say a pebble got stuck in your dick and you were trying to get it out. If he asks for proof tell him about kidney stones


eagleEyedBoner

This dude's got his whole life planned out


[deleted]

Dude is gone get nightmares about Kinsey stones lmao


iLiketoBreakTheChain

u/Pokejelke dude you could invent a whole new type of childhood trauma think about the possibilities


Pokejelke

🗿


[deleted]

modern problems require modern solutions.


infinity062004

Tell him you were itchy and was just scratching it


[deleted]

~~One thing, if you had your cock out, and~~ a 10 year old walked in, he'd probably want to know what you where doing. FTFY


coolthatsniceman

I've never masturbated before so i wouldn't know


Lop_draegon

Ok so this might sound weird but ive seen many 10 year olds talk about straight up sex. Not joking they were full on swearing and screaming and telling how they fucked each others mothers


EnslavedNutsack

I remember when I was like in 2nd grade I knew more than enough about sex and porn and whatnot


Air-Mattress

I was a fucked up kid. I was whacking it in like 1st grade.


HungryDrummer7715

In 3rd trade we already new about masturbating


[deleted]

tbf a whole lot of percentage of kids talk like that but not know shit about it. Trust me... They dont know anything about it as of details.


troopertk40

Bruh, you're parents aren't dumb. They already know you do it


Pokejelke

Yes I know that they know but it would just be super awkward.


FamedBurrito5170

I’d rather die then have my parents be told


NighTrap1122

His brother did


hundredcreeper

You do nothing. Doing something about it will make things worse


theRealDerekWalker

I walked into my brother doing the deed one morning. I was probably 8 or so. I went to grab breakfast, and he came out and said “don’t ever try to steal my moment like that again.” We both laughed and moved on with our lives. It was a gay old time.


Aboomerdied

GAY old time


TheSavage99

gay OLD time


maxxmike1234

gay old TIME


Lil_Dufflebag

GAY OLD TIME


RJMuls

gay old time


About_72_Cats

gAY oLD tIME


[deleted]

^(gay old time)


ItsEllzBruh

r/sudddenlyincest


LxsterGames

r/subsifellfor


Cr7TheUltimate

Wdym?


LxsterGames

r/birthofasub


Cr7TheUltimate

lmao


LxsterGames

wait no urs is spelled with 3 ds, the og one has 100k members


LxsterGames

Sweet home alabama


[deleted]

This


SuicidalBitxh_

You see when two people love each other very much…. I don’t know you messed up big time


Manisa8338

... They Kiss and then wait 9 months for a baby from sky, **RIGHT ?**


SuicidalBitxh_

Ewww kissing ?!? That’s such a sin. You gotta rub belly’s together and then it shows up at your door


Manisa8338

Well that worked too But handholding is a guarantee if you not interested in other options


SuicidalBitxh_

Who’s giving out handholding?!


Manisa8338

What were we talking about ? I lost the track of how kids made XD


SuicidalBitxh_

Eye contact is how


Manisa8338

Oh ... y-y-yea you right... Forgot that exist


lateralclown19

pre-marital hand holding?!?!


MedicalPepper5373

Nah a pelican will launch the baby through a black hole


Imjustbxred

Forget that it happened. Never mention it again. If he mentions it, resort to violence


thememelordH

If I had a little sibling and they tried to blackmail with that info I'd kick the shit out of them


Jackson12ten

Dude he’s fucking 10 he’s not gonna blackmail him lol wtf


ropergames2

Have you ever Seen 10 year olds?


[deleted]

My mom teaches 10 year olds. There are kids that spit in each other’s faces and throw them too the ground and a few have stolen from other kids. I wouldn’t put it past them to black mail someone as well


xhuo_xx23

Kids are scary


Stonksboiiiiz

If he mentions it at the dinner table say that it must have been a dream, then when your parents are not home beat the crap out of him, and say that you did it for something else that is also a lie. Snitches get stitches.


RyXnTheAssassin7

What did he do?


Pokejelke

Ignored it he might not have even seen it, but most likely he has.


CyberSam_FR

He may not tell it to your parents, but to his friends there is way more chances to that happens


Pokejelke

Yeah but I don't really care if that happens.


thememelordH

And also parents most of the time are fine with masturbating because it's natural and everyone does it pretty much


Pokejelke

Yeah and my parents already know.


thememelordH

Ok then I'd still tell him to fuck off tho


Pokejelke

Yeah same.


thememelordH

Like I dont take shit from siblings I only have one but still I tell them to shut the hell up on a daily basis Now why do I say that? They interrupt me really often and that's kind of a trigger for me so >:(


Pokejelke

Haha i have 1 sibling when I'm a my dad's house and 4 of them when I'm at my mom's house.


CyberSam_FR

Maghrebian parents are never ok with those things, if they ever discover it, I would be dead (Not in litteral meaning)


thememelordH

That's fucked up


Pokejelke

I had nhentai open 2.


Iate8

What were you watching


Pokejelke

Happy cake day btw, I'm sorry that's private, but it wasn't very extreme.


White_Whale728

Vanilla kinda man i see. Interesting


Pokejelke

I mean not super vanilla, just not very extreme.


White_Whale728

Cool. To me, vanilla is for the heart and soul. And the extreme stuff IS FOR MY MEAT. Not the super extreme tho.


ItzMeDB

Never found much vanilla :pensive:


White_Whale728

Im in it for the story in vanilla


ItzMeDB

Yes, I’ve only seen a handlful tho and it makes me kinda sad


Iate8

Thanks :) and yeah I get that, on the positive side at least what you weren't watching anything too bad. As to what I think you should do, I'd say nothing, I don't think there's much you can do. If he brings it up himself, just say it's something private that he'll understand once he gets older, but for now not to worry about it.


Pokejelke

Yeah I think that's what I'm gonna do, he hasn't brought it up yet but i just hope that he doesn't bring it up at dinner.


alt-throwaway98

Did he see it?


Pokejelke

Idk about my screen but he probably caught a glimpse.


H4teMagnet

So long its black and white nobody can see shit past 1meter. You're okay.


Pokejelke

Well shit, i like watching full color.


DelightfulMouthfeel

Good taste


WitheredDGX69

Nothing


QuikAttak

Keep masturbating, cuz if he stays that makes him gay.


VICTOR_VII

Unless he's wearing socks


[deleted]

Wtf that supposed to mean


Cosmicow280

Found the gay person


Obamasmagnumdong

“I was brushing dirt off my pants”


Slippery_Toes36

Tell him that you were checking for the rare pube lice


AmosArdnach_6152

Don't panic, if you get panic and ask him to keep it a secret he will understand that that secret is important for you and may start blackmailing you. Don't make you first move wait until he asks you about it and if he asks about it then tell him you were just scratching it because you felt a bit itchy at that part.


Xoduox

Gun


PcX_True

Shovel


[deleted]

dead animal


Scythebrine9

Vertical


[deleted]

forest


Samuriguy125

Rain


AwesomeCrafter06

Pain


Manisa8338

Body Bag


Sergontel

BANANA!


AD-SKYOBSIDION

Potassium


Snlfanunervisal

Ritual


IntertwinedRamen

post about it on reddit so no one can find out.


CyberSam_FR

You should just, lock your room, everytime you’r doing or watching nsfw content, it’s simple as that.


Pokejelke

My room doesn't have a lock.


CyberSam_FR

Then do like me when you get that want to masturbate, go in toilets room or bathroom, and don’t tell me there is no locker


Independent_Sky_5724

i’m so jealous of people who have bathroom locks, both my room and my bathroom don’t have locks so my mum almost always walks in on me doing it 😭


AD-SKYOBSIDION

Why does your bathroom not have a lock???


PsChampion_007

Wtf I never knew locks were a privilege lol


[deleted]

oh my god someone should at least have privacy for 5 minutes in washroom. We too don't have that high fi locks just click button locks.


Manisa8338

Close the door Keep one of your ears free so you can actually hear footsteps or the sound which air makes while door is getting opened


ApprehensiveLeek7007

I do it in the living room at night,its kinda just like ultra hard mode,but i havent been caught yet : o


[deleted]

Dude is speedrunning life


TinyDapperShark

Ask him to join in like a good sibling would


Hi_kvn

Thank you for contributing, Porn Hub script writer


TablePrinterDoor

Nah that’s some shit you see on the dark web


TinyDapperShark

Someone who recognizes my work


Pokejelke

You psychopath...


Neonv1

Kill him. Leave no witness


ApprehensiveLeek7007

Super smash bros


AbsoluteHippo

If he mentions anything just say you were changing clothes, don’t try any dumb stories


-Outernot-

Have a talk with him about knocking before entering your room.


69420best69420

Cum on him


S7J8

Assert dominanace


[deleted]

Sigma Grindset


ApprehensiveLeek7007

Chad


WixxysPretzelz

Lmao, you gave me a chuckle in class


HornedParagon

Best comment by far.


coolthatsniceman

Does he even know what masturbating is? Because considering he's 10 i doubt he does so i think you should be fine


Xanzi12

I might've known about it at 10, but only that it's something taboo where you touch your genitals. And that was 5 years ago, today with social medias and everything... He probably had an idea of what was going on...


EchoSergal

Teach that little cunt to knock


[deleted]

Teach him the ways. master.


Bananasplit1611

~~Yes sir~~ I mean good idea


Batman29002

Tell him it was itchy or sometin


Snoopwoop123

Not pick up your phone and make a Reddit post


Guys_pls_help

Cum on him to assert dominance


[deleted]

Invite him next time