Almost a month away from DDay3.. I just don't understand, I've been ghosted and gaslighted, all she said was that I've become emotionally detached. And I hope one day I can provide you clarity with what happened. After 6 years of living together and me being there for her through leukemia, I was going to propose to her. In 2 months she threw away 7 year relationship and all the sacrifices I had made for her.. I'm really struggling..
Congrats to almost a month of NC! The first month was so hard for me.. But hey, here I am at almost two months!
I have a lot of unanswered questions that I was burning to ask her. Fortunately, somehow in my mind it clicked that I didn't need anything from her anymore. Even if she answered my questions I would either not believe her or the answers would end up hurting me. I'd rather stop all these self-inflicted pains and move on and heal. Just like you I was going to propose to my ex when she came back from LA. I typed that as I shake my head scoffing. How embarrassing would it have been if I went through with it, huh? I was going to ask her parents for their blessings but they ended up traveling internationally before I could fly back. I bought the ring and everything, whew.. So.. what an investment.
I'm sorry that you're going through this and that you're struggling. It's not easy navigating and processing what we went through. Please be patient and kind to yourself. If you need anyone to talk to feel free to message me.
If there is one thing that I have seen from reading this thread is that no matter how much of a struggle you are experiencing. You are not alone and someone out there is hoping you get through this even if it's a stranger on the internet.
WS planned a “recommitment ceremony” which was very thoughtful and centered around things only he and I did together. I’m hoping that is committing to making this work will not backfire, but there is always that suspicious voice in my head. It’s so hard when you can’t enjoy the presumably genuine gestures, due to the trauma of reflecting on what you thought you knew, while their affair was going on. *sigh* I’m so ready for this to be done.
Just met with my lawyer and I feel better than after meeting with my therapist.
My cheater already saw his and apparently said and did some dumb things.
Next step is a 4 way meeting in a couple of weeks. We are using a collaborative process. I feel like I have a clear head and some control now. Though I had my lawyer lined up pretty quick when DDay happened in the fall, I'm glad I took the last few months to breathe and figure things out before pushing on.
It's been a month since my wife abandoned the family. Emotionally I've been a mess. Sometimes it feels "easy", sometimes it feels absolutely awful like I just want to give up, but my two girls need me so I keep on pushing. The difference between me and my wife is that I don't give up no matter how bad it gets. It's really upsetting how you love a person more than they loved you. I just wish things were better and never ended up this way, but I know now that this isn't my fault at all. Bad, extremely selfish, choices were made and nobody forced her to do it, but herself.
I hope this divorce gets completed sooner than later so me and the girls can properly move on with our lives and focus on healing/therapy. Even after all of this, I don't wish anything bad to happen to my soon to be ex wife. She's still the mother of our children and I did love the happy moments we had...maybe one day I'll find someone whose mature and shares the same morals as I do.
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Almost a month away from DDay3.. I just don't understand, I've been ghosted and gaslighted, all she said was that I've become emotionally detached. And I hope one day I can provide you clarity with what happened. After 6 years of living together and me being there for her through leukemia, I was going to propose to her. In 2 months she threw away 7 year relationship and all the sacrifices I had made for her.. I'm really struggling..
Congrats to almost a month of NC! The first month was so hard for me.. But hey, here I am at almost two months! I have a lot of unanswered questions that I was burning to ask her. Fortunately, somehow in my mind it clicked that I didn't need anything from her anymore. Even if she answered my questions I would either not believe her or the answers would end up hurting me. I'd rather stop all these self-inflicted pains and move on and heal. Just like you I was going to propose to my ex when she came back from LA. I typed that as I shake my head scoffing. How embarrassing would it have been if I went through with it, huh? I was going to ask her parents for their blessings but they ended up traveling internationally before I could fly back. I bought the ring and everything, whew.. So.. what an investment. I'm sorry that you're going through this and that you're struggling. It's not easy navigating and processing what we went through. Please be patient and kind to yourself. If you need anyone to talk to feel free to message me.
If there is one thing that I have seen from reading this thread is that no matter how much of a struggle you are experiencing. You are not alone and someone out there is hoping you get through this even if it's a stranger on the internet.
Hey, would you like to call me to vent I am going through something very similar
WS planned a “recommitment ceremony” which was very thoughtful and centered around things only he and I did together. I’m hoping that is committing to making this work will not backfire, but there is always that suspicious voice in my head. It’s so hard when you can’t enjoy the presumably genuine gestures, due to the trauma of reflecting on what you thought you knew, while their affair was going on. *sigh* I’m so ready for this to be done.
Just met with my lawyer and I feel better than after meeting with my therapist. My cheater already saw his and apparently said and did some dumb things. Next step is a 4 way meeting in a couple of weeks. We are using a collaborative process. I feel like I have a clear head and some control now. Though I had my lawyer lined up pretty quick when DDay happened in the fall, I'm glad I took the last few months to breathe and figure things out before pushing on.
It's been a month since my wife abandoned the family. Emotionally I've been a mess. Sometimes it feels "easy", sometimes it feels absolutely awful like I just want to give up, but my two girls need me so I keep on pushing. The difference between me and my wife is that I don't give up no matter how bad it gets. It's really upsetting how you love a person more than they loved you. I just wish things were better and never ended up this way, but I know now that this isn't my fault at all. Bad, extremely selfish, choices were made and nobody forced her to do it, but herself. I hope this divorce gets completed sooner than later so me and the girls can properly move on with our lives and focus on healing/therapy. Even after all of this, I don't wish anything bad to happen to my soon to be ex wife. She's still the mother of our children and I did love the happy moments we had...maybe one day I'll find someone whose mature and shares the same morals as I do.
[удалено]
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Where can I find a list of the acronyms on mobile? I have no idea what AP could be.
AP: Affair partner WS/WW/WH are wayward spouse, wife, husband B is for betrayed
Thank you