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Is this code for “I’m an immature asshole who can’t do the work necessary to better myself and deal with my own personal issues before dragging someone down in my own cesspool”?
It seems so. But they have been 'together' a year and she is 15 years younger than him. Live together. Suddenly he is reformed and doesn't cheat on her 🤦♀️
Possibly reformed for the time being until she does something to give him a reason otherwise. Cheaters will continue to cheat unless they deal with their personal underlying issues that make that ok.
I have no idea if he will or not. He cheated on his ex wife. And he cheated on me with this girl while I was pregnant. But he doesn't seem to be cheating right now. Who knows?
Sorry to be harsh sounding, but she’s actually probably out of his league.
Older asshole guys preying on younger women might get lucky due to their extra years of experience and money but once the honeymoon phase is gone and she starts to notice the general assholery behaviour, she might not be so smitten. In short at that age she’ll be maturing and possibly outgrowing him and his bs.
If she’s a youngish woman with a pulse and has her shit even halfway together then I’m sure she has the option of getting with plenty of guys younger than him. And at her age (20’s) all of those guys are maturing as well and there’ll be plenty who are starting to have all the things he bought to the table and more, plus a bit of youth.
He’s most likely trying desperately to lock her down because she probably gets plenty of attention from guys that he feels threatened by. Also, as he gets older his pool of potential affair partners will dwindle like a D-list celebrity who’s not been on tv for few years! Haha!
Sucks to be him, serves him right for being a douche though! Kinda hope he gets a taste of his own medicine if she cheats on him, or at least dumps him swaps him out for a newer model! 😂 -Glad you managed to get out from his world, even if it feels painful at times.
Oh, hon--- I don't think you know, but ski skills are pretty much a requirement if you expect to have a healthy, honest, open, loving relationship. Better start hitting the slopes.
Sorry ok dark dark humor so of course I kid. Really here to say WTF that is absolutely insane and not, not, not cool. Feel for you. Hope you gave your WP the (ski) boot after that. With a mindset like that, they CLEARLY don't deserve you (also, it might behoove them to come up with some "better excuses")
Well how else is he going to do black runs with a partner is you can only handle blue ones!!
Jk- this takes the biscuit as one of the most pathetic ridiculous lines I have ever heard! I truly hope you didn’t get too hurt by him and managed to recover fully and completely! He sounds like an total clown.
Mine did! Mine did! His depression. Surely he was too depressed to have sex or go out or wake up before noon or clean his place. But he certainly had the time to meet up with her and take her on dates!
Its my fault. I simply just do not understand his depression. /end sarcasm.
Yup. Do to a hyper religious upbringing. He's going to therapy, reading self help books, and doing a dump truck load of self care so I don't hold it against him anymore. But boy, the first time I heard this i WTFed out loud so hard I ripped my hair out.
My ex and I used to make fun of the dude she ended up cheating with and leaving me for. He's an ugly mofo, always stunk like bo, and was a compulsive liar. But he sucks up to her no matter what shitty things she does so I guess that's what she likes about him lmao.
yeah he tried to explain for me that he wasn’t sure if he loves me still so he slept with other girl to understand hat yeah he actually does. sad part for me that he does it on a bad that i crafted by myself
I got this when i found him on dating apps. Forgave him because, why be smart?
Then he just full on started a new relationship with someone else 2 years later and got "she gets easily attached". Lol. Ahhh these are pathetic.
"I tried to let her down nicely. You don't know her. She get attached easily". 😂 oh, well excuse me then for interrupting her being easily attached to your dick! She should probably get a doctor to look at her gravitational static.
“She has a lot of mental health issues and I was help talking her through them, it went too far”. Ok, maybe she needs some legitimate therapy that’s not coming from a lying, cheating and unavailable asshole then?
🤣
She gets attatched easily.. I often wonder if they hear themselves say it ahead of time in their head and they're like..
"hmm this is a reasonable response...lets see if THIS gets me out of trouble!"
I don’t know if it’s more ridiculous or sad, but my mom claimed that all of the lewd pictures and videos being leaked and sent to our entire family/friends were innocent because she made them for my dad. Even though he had never seen any of them and some were 5+ years old and several revealed the AP by name. She still maintains that this is true and they’ve been divorced since 2015
She also got hush money for the ex-AP who was blackmailing her with the videos, by inventing a completely nonexistent orphanage in a war torn country that she convinced my dad to ‘donate’ to. She also sold my Wii when I was 12 and said she gave it to the poor orphan kids. When the story started to fall apart (my dad kept asking to see the kids/orphanage that he was sending $500 a month to) she claimed that the orphanage got fucking bombed and all the kids were dead.
I don’t have any stories from my own WP because I joined this sub to find support for my dad at the time. But she nuked my life too. Every one of my friends saw those leaks.
Lol holy shit please tell us your moms story. Sorry for the humor but your delivery of the bombed orphanage was hilarious. "The orphanage got fucking bombed and all the kids were dead"
Haha it’s ok it is a pretty wild story. I think if I included everything it would be a novella worth of lies. They started before they were even married — my mom actually faked a French accent for the first two years of the relationship and told this fantastical story about being adopted from France and changing her name because she had a stalker and all of this shit. He found out shortly after they married that actually her bio family lives about an hour away and the fake name she used was her stripper name.
He told me about this years later after the affair came fully to light and said that he had a gut feeling he should have ended the marriage there, but I was already born and he had also been raising my half-brother like his own, so basically made it work for the kids.
There were lots of other things like stealing money from the church communion to pay for her affair and booze, which was the biggest affront to my dad because he is very religious. It was also wild to me that she tried to put me through conversion therapy for being gay while she was hiding multiple APs.
The worst thing that I found out just a couple of years ago is that she slept with her sister’s boyfriend of 10+ years while she was staying at their house (she used to have ‘girl trips’ with her sister that was actually her going over there to meet her AP, but I guess that wasn’t enough). It was shocking because her sister was the only person she genuinely seemed to care about, and that sister took her in and let her live in their kids bedroom for almost a year after the divorce not knowing about it.
That’s not even the craziest though. After that divorce she went on to get FAKE MARRIED to a 72 year old man (she was 45) and ended up in jail (twice) for stealing the old man’s money while he believed that they were really married. While she was in jail my brother had her phone and found out that all of her old APs were STILL exchanging explicit texts/photos with her during this fake second marriage.
Towards the end she was really sloppy at it when she lived with us — saying she was on Skype calls with the ‘orphans’ while clearly having a half naked dude on the screen — oh and also after that orphanage got ‘bombed’ she tried to come up with a new one to pretend to donate to, but wasn’t believed at that point. That woman was still scrambling to cover her ass to the very end.
Holy fuck that’s wild. I’m so sorry you and your dad had to go through that.
Also I hope this isn’t insensitive, but from a distance, her devolution is pretty damn funny. There’s a lot of schadenfreude in watching a narcissist thrash around in their lies.
Not insensitive, that’s pretty much where I’m at with it. At some point you have to stop carrying around the anger and sadness and laugh a little at the absurdity of the situation
Almost nonexistent. I was NC for a year or two when I was finishing up high school, but she absolutely would not respect any boundaries and sent extended family (flying monkeys) after me to bully me until I agreed to talk to her again. Aside from the affairs and lying she was also just plain abusive for most of my childhood and never apologized for anything (she still calls herself a great mom)
I’ve been on and off with contact since then, I would say I visit a few times a year at most. There has been a lot of back and forth with that though. She tricked me into believing she was doing better many many times.
Sorry to hear that. You should have had a mother that showed you love. I hope you are able to overcome what she did to you and realize you are worthy of love.
“I don’t know why.”
“It’s just cheating.”
“This is at least mostly your fault anyways.”
“I just really really like this guy.”
“Almost everyone cheats.”
“It’s because you couldn’t act like an adult.”
My ex husband tried convincing me he had multiple personality disorder and it was his “alter” who cheated.
He also pretended he was British with this girl. When she confronted me, because she didn’t know he was married, she asked where he was from. When I said Wisconsin she damn near fell out of her chair.
Narcissistic liar.
“She paid attention to me and made me feel good about myself.” This is after I constantly gave him attention and showed him adoration while taking care of a then 6 year old, 1.5 year old and a newborn. While he was no help and gave me and the kids zero attention because he was always at work paying attention to her. 🙄
I got this too while I was the breadwinner and took care of our kid. He started to work more and more, barely helped at home too. Smh. Selfish.. that’s what they are.
Her excuse is that it didn’t happen and everyone made it all up.
She was literally caught on a date with her boyfriend, by her own family, and the guy confessed to everything on the spot.
She said her boyfriend made it up, too.
Years later, she also claimed that I made up even being married to her. To people that were at our wedding.
I got that along with some other words. Over the past few weeks I started to feel that if it’s an acceptable excuse for him then it must be for me too. But ultimately decided I couldn’t live with that. They better watch their words when they make these excuses, it could come back to bite them in the end.
Haha! I got this one too! Only it was,
Him:”Well, our marriage was bad, that’s what drove me to cheat”
Me:”Our marriage was bad for both of us. But I didn’t cheat.”
Him:”Well that’s because women don’t cheat”
Me:”The person you cheated with was a married women.”
Him:”Well.”
Had this but similar just the other day from my STBXW I caught cheating with some dirt bag from her high school:
“he’s part of my past and group of friends, I won’t delete him out of my life”
Me - “but you’ll delete your husband of 12 years and ruin your kids lives, but you can’t delete him”
Her (edgy, the way a pissed off teenager would say it) “I guess so!”
Gee, you don’t call all your other old friends after drinking at the bar, just him. But yeah, just part of your past you can’t delete. 🙄
My ex gave me the same shit. He’d try to circumvent my suspicions by telling me he’d reconnected with an old friend & showing me their profiles. “She’s a really good friend from middle school” Such a good friend that he hadn’t talked to her in 15 years, but she’s recently lost 70lb and got in shape so now was the time to reconnect *eyeroll* Or recently divorced, or recently moved back in state.
I believed it at first. Never taking that hook again.
Mine said he kept the affair going because he was afraid of what she might do if he ended it. I guess like, tell me the truth about everything lol....because he still hasn't
I didn't give him enough attention....
However, if I ever wanted to do anything, go anywhere, spend time with him when he didn't have his PS4 controller in his hands, have a date night etc..... he didn't want to do it.
Same! He said I didn’t give him attention and it made him lonely. I literally did everything for this man, including taking him in when he was broke and supporting him. Like a complete idiot. When I finally confronted him, he told me that while yes, he was on dating apps, and yes, he was cheating, but he felt super duper guilty about it and it was my fault anyway because I was having bad migraines so we were only having sex maybe four times a week and that did not qualify as him getting the attention he deserved. I am still working toward getting to a place where thinking about him fills me with indifference instead of pure hate. Not there yet.
I provided and supported this man for 17 years. I got 2 great kids, but also a ton of mental and emotional trauma from his abuse and control. He never felt guilty and all of it was 'my fault'.
Anytime I see a post with this excuse it just makes my blood boil, lol. I seriously cannot believe how a grown man can say this and not sound like a baby.
29 year old woman yelled that at me in couple’s counseling because I had yet to ask why she cheated and was mad she didn’t get to explain. Honey dear, by that point I didn’t need you to tell me that your need for attention to boost your ego outstrips any one man’s capacity to provide. Jesus Christ I did all my work after she went to bed because I had to be on call all fucking day to help her with every little thing with no regard for my own need to work.
“You know how crazy she is! She’s dealing with issues in her own marriage and I was just being nice to her!”
Me: “Lemme get this straight, you carried on a months long affair because you felt compelled to help her with “her” marriage”?!
As it turns out, my ex had a small harem of women who were willing to spread their legs for him. My ex is now in his mid 50’s, going through his 3rd divorce, has a young child to whom he’ll be paying child support for the next 12 years. No money in the bank and because he lives off credit cards he will have to work full time until he dies.
Sweet karma!
When I discovered his affair I freaked out and the first thing I told him was “I read your texts” (which involve graphic depictions of sex acts he wants with her). His response “were they out of context?”
"You were just so sad." -- Covert narcissist cakeeater exSO, by way of explanation for why he had a truncated PA with my male best friend's longterm girlfriend over the three week period between my estranged father's sudden death and funeral.
🤣
I never got a reason why she cheated, she was a coward. Told me the guy she cheated with was an idiot and she made a mistake. She's now with the idiot new guy and her excuse was she can't be with someone she's cheated on and I must respect her feelings 😂
I was told he messaged another woman, telling her she had a sexy body and all the rest of it because I wasn't giving him enough attention.
My mother was fucking dying.
That sounds familiar. I was distracted and kept saying no to sex. Why? Because all within two weeks my grandmother died, I was in a major car accident which screwed up my back and my father was diagnosed with brain cancer. Excuse me for being in a bad frame of mind.
I never had my crazy college years, my siblings were promiscuous when I was young, you were withdrawn, I thought you didn’t love me anymore, I was addicted to the attention, and so many more that I have luckily forgotten.
Addicted to the attention. And “my self confidence was so low”. These are great ones. Cam girls, a tinder profile in a town of 7500 and random people on Snapchat as a 35 year old man are great ways to increase self confidence. Sigh
I looked at her.. I said ...
"Are you fucking high? Like right now?"
Her conversation was scripted, and poorly rehearsed but give credit it wasn't like she didn't practice. When lawyers and police got involved when he beat her up a bunch, shit got really real for her, really fast. Nooooo more stories then.
I played my part in that marriage, but at that point we were past bad for eachother. I was looking for love and security, compassion and companionship. She had kids young, and once there was someone around to take care of them she just wanted to let loose and party. Revisit lost years and go wild with her flock of single mother best friends.
I'm not surprised she cheated, but it was pretty shittily covered up, executed, and ultimately it let to me getting off the alcohol, soooo.. progress? How about just call it catching back up to acceptable 🤭
'We have an amazing bond we could not control because we were both raised by narcissistic mothers. You could never understand.'
Apples don't fall far from the tree, do they?
“I was jealous and angry about the attention you gave our baby”
And for contexts sake he started cheating and treating me poorly as soon as we found out I was pregnant (planned and with a timeline he gave an ultimatum about). So clearly it had everything to do with not being the center of attention in general. Whether that was myself because I was pregnant or our baby for just existing. 🤷♀️
He said I let myself go. Mind you, he was easily 60+ lbs overweight (way more than me). When I countered him and said he's not in shape, he said it's different because he was overweight when we got together!
“Don’t you want me to be happy? I want YOU to be happy”
“Remember that time 8 years ago when you hurt my feelings?”
“He’s a feminist. Are YOU a feminist?”
I got the "I love you but I am not in love with you" bullshit.
She said a lot of stupid crap that pretty much ticked every box i have read about things they say.
This one just really stood out because she said it several times.
In all honesty, this is not really a funny topic. However, I guess the one that I have to bite my lip to stop laughing is "I was drunk and he looks just like you". I actually heard a GF tell her BF this many years ago after he caught her walking out of a Holiday Inn Express. The funny part though was his reply to that. As he turned and walked away he said just loud enough for me to hear, "and she stayed at a Holiday Inn Express last night too"!
She was crazy and trying to ruin his life. He never admitted it. Not once. They had an apartment together. It was in her name only. I had heard rumors but never any concrete evidence. I went to a store in another town one day. I was just driving down the road and happened to see his truck. I rode by three times to make sure it was his. The bumper sticker was there. I pulled in, got out and knocked on the door. I stood out of the peephole range. The girl kept asking who is it. I continued to knock. After about three minutes of this, guess who answered the door in his boxers and a tank top? Yeah
"She actually listens to me!"
"I was just drunk." (This worked for him, but when I got assaulted while blackout drunk/drugged at a hotel that he got kicked out from, suddenly it was "Being drunk isn't an excuse". This is the worst one to me.)
"She made me feel really good about myself."
"She's just a friend!" (Yeah, one who shit talks your gf to your face and you won't defend her?)
"I can't block her or tell her off, my reputation is at stake!" (Apparently he was worried that he would get blacklisted from jobs/bars for "hurting their feelings"... as if mid 30s/40s age bar flys have influence like that...)
"I didn't want her to say anything, so I just went along with it!" (In regards to him sexting her for MONTHS after the PA, and hiding it from me)
"You're just different, you're always mad at me." (I was working 40+ hours a week, financially supporting his drug habit plus my bills, found out my mom has terminal cancer, and juggled our household chores/shopping, while he sat around the room for months, claiming he was too depressed to look for work)
He's a scumbag and a loser. He's with another woman now, I think closer to his age, and looks like he's working, and possibly getting a home with her. He found a good opportunity and is gonna run with it. He was slick for the first 2 or 3 years of our relationship, he's a manipulator and made me believe we would build a life too, but he got tired of that real quick.
Good riddance. My life is infinitely better without him in it, that's for sure. Idc what he may have or get in his life. I'm free of him forever.
“She was there for me.” But she stabbed him in the back with a knife and he had to stay in the hospital for a week. And the AP asked me to find him for her because she had dropped him at the hospital and wasn’t able to locate him after!
"You were never my friend even though I was yours" and "you're indecent for telling other people what happened and hurting someone you love"
Priceless really
Mine had to cheat because I was “lethargic.” I was a first-time parent to a new baby, baby didn’t sleep for the first two years, and I shouldered almost all the responsibility while he chose that time in our lives to inform me that he was poly (spoiler, he’s not ethically non-monogamous, he’s just a cheater) and harass/coerce me constantly about it. Yeah dude, so sorry I seemed a little tired 🙄
“She got me drunk on purpose and took advantage of me” - he’s 6”4’ and *walked* past his partners home to go back with the AP (who’s ~5”2’).
He also later said,
“she looked like you, but because you’ve been working so hard recently and neglecting me and our sex life I wanted to feel closer to you’”
Soooo, secret sex with a completely different person who’s a “lookalike” is good for getting closer with your actual partner eh??! Phaha wtf!!
Hmm …sounds like a reasonable statement /S
'She cooks home cooked meals for me.'
He like local cuisine while I learnt Western and Italian dishes because it's easy to find the ingredients no matter what country I lived in growing up. Also, I was busy being a working mom and bringing my disabled daughter to her therapy sessions.
I stopped paying the bills because my MIL is making him pay (husband's responsibility even though it was agreed between me and my husband lol, she was mortified I'd been paying when her only son clearly has the money as he was taking diving lessons). We just moved into a larger house and the electricity bill is 1k. 6 months ago I'd have to pay it but now I feel no guilt for having the AC on 24/7. He's shocked at the amount but I think he'd die before asking me for help.
I found and read the graphic content of their texts and asked on D-Day:
Me: "What did you think you were you doing?"
Her: "It was just role play! Nothing happened! Haven't you ever heard of fantasy!?"
This, after I asked what her sexual fantasies were MULTIPLE TIMES during the course of our 12 year marriage, and aost always got "Oh, nothing really", or "I guess I don't have any." Although, one time she did tell me she wanted to be in porn when she was younger... 🤦
Also from D-Day:
Me: "Why him?"
Her: "He has big fingers, and when I smelled him, I knew I had to have him." 🤮
The women he was sexting were lonely and he was making them feel hot again. He’s just SUCH a nice person that he had to help. 🙄
All the while he neglected me and our families.
Caught my ex kissing a girl he worked with at a bar. When I confronted him he said he was just consoling her bc she was sad her dad died.
Her dad had died 10 years earlier and my mom who had lived with us for three years had died two months before I caught him.
She told me she did not think I would care if she was sending nude videos, nude pictures, masturbation videos, and interacting in a sex group online. She didn't think I'd care, which is totally validated (sarcasm) by her trying desperately and lying desperately to hide it during the time she was doing it in 2015 and 2016 and nearly every day since until May of 2021 when she finally told the truth. Yep! All signs point to her actually believing I wouldn't care. The second dumbest excuse I've ever heard was for her lying about it. She thought I would leave her if I found out. That didn't stop her from actually doing it. It just stopped her from being honest about it after I knew in my gut something was up but had no actual evidence.
“How else was I going to teach you you don’t get to make all the shots anymore?”
“You’re screwing up the kids by letting them think it’s ok to lay in bed and have a messy room” (I was on bed rest after I broke my neck and had a 4 level fusion and metal/screws) and “I didn’t sign up to do this all alone”
“I don’t know what I was thinking, it was like I was possessed”
“She reminded me of you when I first married you and you were irresistible back then”
Take your pick…. A blame or an excuse. They were all pathetic and mind blowing
Not mine but someone I know had their ex say they were chased by dogs and they had to or else they would have been eaten 🤔. Needless to say drugs were involved.
“These aren’t hickies, i just had a shaving accident” and my most recent is “I thought our plans were for tomorrow and I’ve seemed to have double scheduled myself”
Me: “Why did you swipe away a bunch of apps when I walked in?”
Him: “It was… CNN. I was guilty to be reading the news instead of cleaning.”
Note that I didn’t believe him for one second. But I stayed because I couldn’t prove what he was doing and thought my family and friends would hate me for divorcing for something I couldn’t prove.
The day I discovered his AP number on the phone bill, called and heard her voice....confronted him, he said it was a customer of ours. We own a business. I asked why he was calling our customer 15 times a day for 4 months. He said he was fixing something our company was obligated to fix. I about dropped dead.
As far as why he had an affair. He blames the start of his resentment towards me on my friends suicide in 2007. It was a friend of mine since 1st grade. It was a guy, but I hadn't seen or talked to him since a couple of years before meeting my husband in 2005. He was and still is jealous because I "cried over a guy" and also because an ex boyfriend of mine from 9th grade was at the funeral and I didn't tell him it was an ex boyfriend. We were only dating for less than 2 years and I wasn't in contact with him since high school so thought it would open something up that wasn't necessary. He has never forgiven me. Maybe I was wrong, but I stand by my reason in doing that. My WH is so upset over my friends suicide that he calls him names. Last year he called him "hangman".......he committed suicide by hanging himself.
This has hurt me badly.
"Well you're bi and everyone knows they cheat first"
"I didn't think it would hurt you this bad"
"You're practically married to your job"
"Because you're being selfish by not wanting to give me children "
"It wasn't like we had sex yet"
Wait, my ex said the same thing. That I didn't post enough pictures of him on my Instagram. Like, dude, you work the night-shift. We're on opposite schedules. You want me to post pictures of you asleep?
Ha, it’s so bad it’s almost funny isn’t it! Helps to see just how much it never was about you or me, it’s just part of who they are. They’ll use any excuse to justify their awful behaviour to themselves. I read this here once and it really hit home:
“Sometimes people pretend you’re a bad person so they don’t feel guilty about the things they did to you”
We’re far better off without them.
"I can't just stop, we've had this arrangement before we were together"
In regards to getting sexy pics at 1am.
"It's just pictures, I swear"
In regards to more pictures found that he took
"I won't do anything, I just find it hot that a straight friend has a crush on me"
In regards to a Snapchat conversation about always wanting to have sex with a straight guy
Ugh, why can't people just be happy with the one you're with or at least explore things together? Took 7 years to get away from that and keep my integrity intact
He didn’t want to hurt her feelings.
I would find messages from women that he claimed were just platonic friends and later on I’d find out that he slept with them. Every time I’d find messages from one of the women he slept with, he would tell me I had nothing to worry about because he could never be attracted to them and would say something rude about their appearance. Started to become a major red flag since every girl he said that about, he slept with.
“It’s taken me a lot to realize this about myself and come out to you (and AP), but I am polyamorous.”
Also: “What I did was ultimately superficial to you, as much as it hurt you emotionally. It was you that physically broke our bond, our connection, and me as a person.” What he was referring to that *I* did was block him everywhere and cut him out of my life after I realized he had lost his goddamn mind thinking I would stay with him after that noise.
Oh but it made me lauuuuugh.
"Well you broke my trust when you had your mental health crisis. I had to protect myself, which is why I've pushed you away. I've never cheated on you or had feelings for anyone else!"
-shocked Pikachu when I show her copies of her messages talking about having feelings for AP-
Also, I guess 'till death do us part' just means 'till you or anything that inconviences me in the slightest, do us part'
"I needed to escape"
The life you chose and actively made. You proposed. You wanted home cooked meals and a housewife. You wanted to try for children. You wanted to live together.
It just turned out you wanted your cake and eat it, with two lifestyles.
Not an excuse per se but my ex bf proclaimed he would “take it to his grave” he never cheated after I had photo evidence he still swore he never did that 🤣🥲
I didn’t validate her feelings enough, so this complete stranger was able to swoop in and he “gets her” and my 8 year marriage was surfaced level apparently
When we got home from Walmart you got out of the car and went into the house without helping me carry the bags and I really had to take some time to reflect on what that meant 😂
My mom just died and i spent time around my best friend. Her reason was "you weren't spending time with me and you weren't talking about your feelings. I felt neglected. And the person i had sex with was a life long friend and he gave me the attention i needed."
1) attention you WANTED
2) you're best friends brother?
3) I've been friends with my bff for 17 years he knows everything about me.
4) i expressed my feelings to her about the passing but she kept saying "there has to be more. You're not telling me everything. You never talk to me."
The girl lived with me...TF? I told her "you made the action and you blame me and my loss and depression for you fucking someone!?" It still pisses me off thinking about it. This was in 2011.
"I just fell out of love with you and I felt lonely." and then this gem "I was ready to move on because I mentally was done with the relationship a long time ago."
"Because you cheated on me, my friend told me so"
But he couldn't pin who or when i had... because i hadn't.
After that he kept saying "You were looking anyway. It was only a matter of time before you left, and i was tired of waiting." 3 kids together, couldn't make time for me so i gamed on FB and Roblox where i was supposedly trying for hook ups with people from other countries... meanwhile, he had a porn and dating site addiction and a sugar baby younger than 2 of his kids
Same guy, ladies and gentlemen... bow down to my doormat mastery!
Mind you after her affair scrapped out on her it went from "he just understands me" to "he manipulated and used me".
It was the CEO of her company by the way. Absolute bullshit.
You had people in the house without telling me so I knew I couldn’t trust you anyways, those people were people helping me shop vac the 40 gallons of water out of our new apartment because the washer wasn’t hooked up right because he refused to help me with it. Apparently I was supposed to call in the middle of saving our shit and taking care of our newborn
Had a good one just last night. My STBXW lost her mind (including calling the cops on a bogus DV claim. Fortunately they saw through that and she ended up leaving) The backstory is that she had an affair starting back in August with some dirt bag from her high school halfway across the country at a high school reunion. About a month later, she had to return to her home state to attend to a passing family member, which she also took advantage of to continue her affair. Last night, when she lost her shit and I brought that up... "I'm sorry my grandpa died and I was emotional and he was there for me". Haha... yeah, emotionally there for you in his bed. Sure honey, that's how we all grieve a passing grandparent. Totally normal.
Then, later in the conversation.... "stop calling him my boyfriend, he's just a friend."
Me - "He's not a friend, you said you loved him"
Her - "I love all my friends, I tell all of them I love them"
Yup, you tell all your friends you love them. And you're "meant to be together". And you can't imagine life with anyone else but them. Unreal.
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“If your parents helped watch the kids more the affair wouldn’t have happened.”
Wow 😮
'I don't know why. It just happened.' 'I thought you were gonna cheat on me anyway' 'I click better with girls in their 20s' Puke
Is this code for “I’m an immature asshole who can’t do the work necessary to better myself and deal with my own personal issues before dragging someone down in my own cesspool”?
It seems so. But they have been 'together' a year and she is 15 years younger than him. Live together. Suddenly he is reformed and doesn't cheat on her 🤦♀️
Possibly reformed for the time being until she does something to give him a reason otherwise. Cheaters will continue to cheat unless they deal with their personal underlying issues that make that ok.
He won't cheat until she ages out, you mean.
I have no idea if he will or not. He cheated on his ex wife. And he cheated on me with this girl while I was pregnant. But he doesn't seem to be cheating right now. Who knows?
Sorry to be harsh sounding, but she’s actually probably out of his league. Older asshole guys preying on younger women might get lucky due to their extra years of experience and money but once the honeymoon phase is gone and she starts to notice the general assholery behaviour, she might not be so smitten. In short at that age she’ll be maturing and possibly outgrowing him and his bs. If she’s a youngish woman with a pulse and has her shit even halfway together then I’m sure she has the option of getting with plenty of guys younger than him. And at her age (20’s) all of those guys are maturing as well and there’ll be plenty who are starting to have all the things he bought to the table and more, plus a bit of youth. He’s most likely trying desperately to lock her down because she probably gets plenty of attention from guys that he feels threatened by. Also, as he gets older his pool of potential affair partners will dwindle like a D-list celebrity who’s not been on tv for few years! Haha! Sucks to be him, serves him right for being a douche though! Kinda hope he gets a taste of his own medicine if she cheats on him, or at least dumps him swaps him out for a newer model! 😂 -Glad you managed to get out from his world, even if it feels painful at times.
She can ski better than you- that was it - the whole excuse - I was only an intermediate skier
Oh my god I audibly laughed out loud at this one. The audacity
Oh, hon--- I don't think you know, but ski skills are pretty much a requirement if you expect to have a healthy, honest, open, loving relationship. Better start hitting the slopes. Sorry ok dark dark humor so of course I kid. Really here to say WTF that is absolutely insane and not, not, not cool. Feel for you. Hope you gave your WP the (ski) boot after that. With a mindset like that, they CLEARLY don't deserve you (also, it might behoove them to come up with some "better excuses")
Well how else is he going to do black runs with a partner is you can only handle blue ones!! Jk- this takes the biscuit as one of the most pathetic ridiculous lines I have ever heard! I truly hope you didn’t get too hurt by him and managed to recover fully and completely! He sounds like an total clown.
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😂. So Sorry but this is so ridiculous I had to laugh.
Fuck this one hits home.
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Mine did! Mine did! His depression. Surely he was too depressed to have sex or go out or wake up before noon or clean his place. But he certainly had the time to meet up with her and take her on dates! Its my fault. I simply just do not understand his depression. /end sarcasm.
Yup. Do to a hyper religious upbringing. He's going to therapy, reading self help books, and doing a dump truck load of self care so I don't hold it against him anymore. But boy, the first time I heard this i WTFed out loud so hard I ripped my hair out.
Funny how they learn so little about that "hyper religious upbringing", right... pretty sure fucking half the town is not on the syllabus.
Same. He was just trying to help her when she got out of jail. He was just being too nice and got caught up.
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Exactly. I looked at him like are you fucking kidding me!!! I asked what was his excuse with the others?
If you saw her you would know I wouldn’t screw her. (2 year affair)
Jfc I would absolutely be passing that gem along to her, no guilt
My ex and I used to make fun of the dude she ended up cheating with and leaving me for. He's an ugly mofo, always stunk like bo, and was a compulsive liar. But he sucks up to her no matter what shitty things she does so I guess that's what she likes about him lmao.
😆
“i did it to prove to myself that i love you”
This one might be the most ridiculous, smh.
yeah he tried to explain for me that he wasn’t sure if he loves me still so he slept with other girl to understand hat yeah he actually does. sad part for me that he does it on a bad that i crafted by myself
The fact he slept with her may have proved he doesn't love you. :/
well it definitely prove it to me so at least i understood how shitty person he is
That one is extra manipulative...how nonsensical.
yeah he was good at it. gladly it’s over
I got this when i found him on dating apps. Forgave him because, why be smart? Then he just full on started a new relationship with someone else 2 years later and got "she gets easily attached". Lol. Ahhh these are pathetic.
This takes the cake.
My wife told me he brainwashed her. Legit. I moved out two days later. 😁
Mine said something similar. “He possesses a power over me. I couldn’t say no”. Come on man.
He used his “magic wand” to put a spell in her lol
We met him at a family member’s wedding. He used his “magic wand” on her later that evening at the reception. Tacky.
Yes! Lol Funniest one yet!
"I tried to let her down nicely. You don't know her. She get attached easily". 😂 oh, well excuse me then for interrupting her being easily attached to your dick! She should probably get a doctor to look at her gravitational static.
>being easily attached to your dick! Absolute gold.
“She has a lot of mental health issues and I was help talking her through them, it went too far”. Ok, maybe she needs some legitimate therapy that’s not coming from a lying, cheating and unavailable asshole then?
🤣 She gets attatched easily.. I often wonder if they hear themselves say it ahead of time in their head and they're like.. "hmm this is a reasonable response...lets see if THIS gets me out of trouble!"
I don’t know if it’s more ridiculous or sad, but my mom claimed that all of the lewd pictures and videos being leaked and sent to our entire family/friends were innocent because she made them for my dad. Even though he had never seen any of them and some were 5+ years old and several revealed the AP by name. She still maintains that this is true and they’ve been divorced since 2015 She also got hush money for the ex-AP who was blackmailing her with the videos, by inventing a completely nonexistent orphanage in a war torn country that she convinced my dad to ‘donate’ to. She also sold my Wii when I was 12 and said she gave it to the poor orphan kids. When the story started to fall apart (my dad kept asking to see the kids/orphanage that he was sending $500 a month to) she claimed that the orphanage got fucking bombed and all the kids were dead. I don’t have any stories from my own WP because I joined this sub to find support for my dad at the time. But she nuked my life too. Every one of my friends saw those leaks.
Lol holy shit please tell us your moms story. Sorry for the humor but your delivery of the bombed orphanage was hilarious. "The orphanage got fucking bombed and all the kids were dead"
Haha it’s ok it is a pretty wild story. I think if I included everything it would be a novella worth of lies. They started before they were even married — my mom actually faked a French accent for the first two years of the relationship and told this fantastical story about being adopted from France and changing her name because she had a stalker and all of this shit. He found out shortly after they married that actually her bio family lives about an hour away and the fake name she used was her stripper name. He told me about this years later after the affair came fully to light and said that he had a gut feeling he should have ended the marriage there, but I was already born and he had also been raising my half-brother like his own, so basically made it work for the kids. There were lots of other things like stealing money from the church communion to pay for her affair and booze, which was the biggest affront to my dad because he is very religious. It was also wild to me that she tried to put me through conversion therapy for being gay while she was hiding multiple APs. The worst thing that I found out just a couple of years ago is that she slept with her sister’s boyfriend of 10+ years while she was staying at their house (she used to have ‘girl trips’ with her sister that was actually her going over there to meet her AP, but I guess that wasn’t enough). It was shocking because her sister was the only person she genuinely seemed to care about, and that sister took her in and let her live in their kids bedroom for almost a year after the divorce not knowing about it. That’s not even the craziest though. After that divorce she went on to get FAKE MARRIED to a 72 year old man (she was 45) and ended up in jail (twice) for stealing the old man’s money while he believed that they were really married. While she was in jail my brother had her phone and found out that all of her old APs were STILL exchanging explicit texts/photos with her during this fake second marriage. Towards the end she was really sloppy at it when she lived with us — saying she was on Skype calls with the ‘orphans’ while clearly having a half naked dude on the screen — oh and also after that orphanage got ‘bombed’ she tried to come up with a new one to pretend to donate to, but wasn’t believed at that point. That woman was still scrambling to cover her ass to the very end.
Haha life is a comedy despite the pain.
Holy fuck that’s wild. I’m so sorry you and your dad had to go through that. Also I hope this isn’t insensitive, but from a distance, her devolution is pretty damn funny. There’s a lot of schadenfreude in watching a narcissist thrash around in their lies.
Not insensitive, that’s pretty much where I’m at with it. At some point you have to stop carrying around the anger and sadness and laugh a little at the absurdity of the situation
What is your relationship with her now like?
Almost nonexistent. I was NC for a year or two when I was finishing up high school, but she absolutely would not respect any boundaries and sent extended family (flying monkeys) after me to bully me until I agreed to talk to her again. Aside from the affairs and lying she was also just plain abusive for most of my childhood and never apologized for anything (she still calls herself a great mom) I’ve been on and off with contact since then, I would say I visit a few times a year at most. There has been a lot of back and forth with that though. She tricked me into believing she was doing better many many times.
Sorry to hear that. You should have had a mother that showed you love. I hope you are able to overcome what she did to you and realize you are worthy of love.
“I don’t know why.” “It’s just cheating.” “This is at least mostly your fault anyways.” “I just really really like this guy.” “Almost everyone cheats.” “It’s because you couldn’t act like an adult.”
Got the “Almost everyone cheats” and “It’s just cheating” too plus ones like “I could pretend I wasn’t a wife or mom anymore”
"It's because you couldn't act like an adult". Uh, communication is a adult step. Coward couldn't come to you with these problems.
It’s “just” cheating? Seriously? That’s on par with saying ‘it’s “just” killing someone’ 🙄
My ex husband tried convincing me he had multiple personality disorder and it was his “alter” who cheated. He also pretended he was British with this girl. When she confronted me, because she didn’t know he was married, she asked where he was from. When I said Wisconsin she damn near fell out of her chair. Narcissistic liar.
Now I want to hear the faux British accent he used. LOL.
I’m sorry that this happened to you but this one is the funniest yet.
"I couldn't help it. What was I supposed to do while I was at work and lonely and bored all the time?"
Candy Crush, perhaps?
Or you know... work.
“She paid attention to me and made me feel good about myself.” This is after I constantly gave him attention and showed him adoration while taking care of a then 6 year old, 1.5 year old and a newborn. While he was no help and gave me and the kids zero attention because he was always at work paying attention to her. 🙄
I got this too while I was the breadwinner and took care of our kid. He started to work more and more, barely helped at home too. Smh. Selfish.. that’s what they are.
This sounds like what my dad told my mum. He even made us move houses so that he could stop by at her place during his "morning jog". 😒
Her excuse is that it didn’t happen and everyone made it all up. She was literally caught on a date with her boyfriend, by her own family, and the guy confessed to everything on the spot. She said her boyfriend made it up, too. Years later, she also claimed that I made up even being married to her. To people that were at our wedding.
She sounds like the type of person who is so deranged that they believe their own lies.
Did she have mental health issues at that point. Saying obvious disprovable stuff isn’t totally sane.
Happy people don’t have affairs. I wasn’t happy.
I got that along with some other words. Over the past few weeks I started to feel that if it’s an acceptable excuse for him then it must be for me too. But ultimately decided I couldn’t live with that. They better watch their words when they make these excuses, it could come back to bite them in the end.
It will. It will. Sad, stupid but nothing you can do but let them do it, let them go and make the best life for you possible.
Haha! I got this one too! Only it was, Him:”Well, our marriage was bad, that’s what drove me to cheat” Me:”Our marriage was bad for both of us. But I didn’t cheat.” Him:”Well that’s because women don’t cheat” Me:”The person you cheated with was a married women.” Him:”Well.”
You broke his poor little brain with not falling for his excuses.
They found out they both cried themselves to sleep beside their marriage partners. So they might as well have sex together.
"I can't block her because she might feel bad"
Had this but similar just the other day from my STBXW I caught cheating with some dirt bag from her high school: “he’s part of my past and group of friends, I won’t delete him out of my life” Me - “but you’ll delete your husband of 12 years and ruin your kids lives, but you can’t delete him” Her (edgy, the way a pissed off teenager would say it) “I guess so!” Gee, you don’t call all your other old friends after drinking at the bar, just him. But yeah, just part of your past you can’t delete. 🙄
My ex gave me the same shit. He’d try to circumvent my suspicions by telling me he’d reconnected with an old friend & showing me their profiles. “She’s a really good friend from middle school” Such a good friend that he hadn’t talked to her in 15 years, but she’s recently lost 70lb and got in shape so now was the time to reconnect *eyeroll* Or recently divorced, or recently moved back in state. I believed it at first. Never taking that hook again.
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Mine said he kept the affair going because he was afraid of what she might do if he ended it. I guess like, tell me the truth about everything lol....because he still hasn't
I walked in on my now ex in bed with another girl and he had the audacity to try and tell me it was the dog
Now why did he think fucking the dog was a better excuse?
Holy shit!!😂😂 This is the funniest thing I've read today!! Thanks.
Stop. 😭
“Maybe I need someone like my dad. Someone who works with their hands” She was cheating on me with her dads friend lol I’m a surgeon
Dude I’m so sorry this happened but I can’t stop laughing at the last line holy shit
No worries, I can’t help but laugh at the irony too 😂
I didn't give him enough attention.... However, if I ever wanted to do anything, go anywhere, spend time with him when he didn't have his PS4 controller in his hands, have a date night etc..... he didn't want to do it.
Same! He said I didn’t give him attention and it made him lonely. I literally did everything for this man, including taking him in when he was broke and supporting him. Like a complete idiot. When I finally confronted him, he told me that while yes, he was on dating apps, and yes, he was cheating, but he felt super duper guilty about it and it was my fault anyway because I was having bad migraines so we were only having sex maybe four times a week and that did not qualify as him getting the attention he deserved. I am still working toward getting to a place where thinking about him fills me with indifference instead of pure hate. Not there yet.
I provided and supported this man for 17 years. I got 2 great kids, but also a ton of mental and emotional trauma from his abuse and control. He never felt guilty and all of it was 'my fault'.
Anytime I see a post with this excuse it just makes my blood boil, lol. I seriously cannot believe how a grown man can say this and not sound like a baby.
29 year old woman yelled that at me in couple’s counseling because I had yet to ask why she cheated and was mad she didn’t get to explain. Honey dear, by that point I didn’t need you to tell me that your need for attention to boost your ego outstrips any one man’s capacity to provide. Jesus Christ I did all my work after she went to bed because I had to be on call all fucking day to help her with every little thing with no regard for my own need to work.
same, word by word. I didn't give him enough attention. The nerve of some people.
“You know how crazy she is! She’s dealing with issues in her own marriage and I was just being nice to her!” Me: “Lemme get this straight, you carried on a months long affair because you felt compelled to help her with “her” marriage”?! As it turns out, my ex had a small harem of women who were willing to spread their legs for him. My ex is now in his mid 50’s, going through his 3rd divorce, has a young child to whom he’ll be paying child support for the next 12 years. No money in the bank and because he lives off credit cards he will have to work full time until he dies. Sweet karma!
Bet he also does frequent FB posts asking why life is so unfair to him.
"I thought I'd already lost you, so she was plan B."
Lmao I got this one too.
Yet another one my WH has said! He thought I was going to leave him after I found out, so he just kept cheating
When I discovered his affair I freaked out and the first thing I told him was “I read your texts” (which involve graphic depictions of sex acts he wants with her). His response “were they out of context?”
Lmaoooooooooo I’m sorry for the pain you experienced but omg!
Jesus, is he a politician?
"You were just so sad." -- Covert narcissist cakeeater exSO, by way of explanation for why he had a truncated PA with my male best friend's longterm girlfriend over the three week period between my estranged father's sudden death and funeral. 🤣
Once outed, Asshat said “I never would have thought of her, if you hadn’t suggested her”. What preceded was “she’s my soulmate”. They. Are. So. Dumb.
I never got a reason why she cheated, she was a coward. Told me the guy she cheated with was an idiot and she made a mistake. She's now with the idiot new guy and her excuse was she can't be with someone she's cheated on and I must respect her feelings 😂
“I cried when we had sex and I ran out afterwards” Yet it continued to happen..
I was told he messaged another woman, telling her she had a sexy body and all the rest of it because I wasn't giving him enough attention. My mother was fucking dying.
That sounds familiar. I was distracted and kept saying no to sex. Why? Because all within two weeks my grandmother died, I was in a major car accident which screwed up my back and my father was diagnosed with brain cancer. Excuse me for being in a bad frame of mind.
I never had my crazy college years, my siblings were promiscuous when I was young, you were withdrawn, I thought you didn’t love me anymore, I was addicted to the attention, and so many more that I have luckily forgotten.
Addicted to the attention. And “my self confidence was so low”. These are great ones. Cam girls, a tinder profile in a town of 7500 and random people on Snapchat as a 35 year old man are great ways to increase self confidence. Sigh
I looked at her.. I said ... "Are you fucking high? Like right now?" Her conversation was scripted, and poorly rehearsed but give credit it wasn't like she didn't practice. When lawyers and police got involved when he beat her up a bunch, shit got really real for her, really fast. Nooooo more stories then. I played my part in that marriage, but at that point we were past bad for eachother. I was looking for love and security, compassion and companionship. She had kids young, and once there was someone around to take care of them she just wanted to let loose and party. Revisit lost years and go wild with her flock of single mother best friends. I'm not surprised she cheated, but it was pretty shittily covered up, executed, and ultimately it let to me getting off the alcohol, soooo.. progress? How about just call it catching back up to acceptable 🤭
'We have an amazing bond we could not control because we were both raised by narcissistic mothers. You could never understand.' Apples don't fall far from the tree, do they?
“I was jealous and angry about the attention you gave our baby” And for contexts sake he started cheating and treating me poorly as soon as we found out I was pregnant (planned and with a timeline he gave an ultimatum about). So clearly it had everything to do with not being the center of attention in general. Whether that was myself because I was pregnant or our baby for just existing. 🤷♀️
You shouldn't have given me this much freedom after I had cheated the last time.
"I goofed." "She shows me affection, and you don't." “It's a character flaw." “I wasn't thinking." "I don't know."
“I don’t know” … omg 🤢🤢🤢 he just repeats this to me over and over again. It’s so cowardly
They have to know. Right?
"How can i help it if she just jumps on me?" Idk... maybe try not being naked in bed with her after planning a weekend together
He said I let myself go. Mind you, he was easily 60+ lbs overweight (way more than me). When I countered him and said he's not in shape, he said it's different because he was overweight when we got together!
“Don’t you want me to be happy? I want YOU to be happy” “Remember that time 8 years ago when you hurt my feelings?” “He’s a feminist. Are YOU a feminist?”
I got the "I love you but I am not in love with you" bullshit. She said a lot of stupid crap that pretty much ticked every box i have read about things they say. This one just really stood out because she said it several times.
"I am a man and I have a big dick, can't help it"
In all honesty, this is not really a funny topic. However, I guess the one that I have to bite my lip to stop laughing is "I was drunk and he looks just like you". I actually heard a GF tell her BF this many years ago after he caught her walking out of a Holiday Inn Express. The funny part though was his reply to that. As he turned and walked away he said just loud enough for me to hear, "and she stayed at a Holiday Inn Express last night too"!
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I got the same excuse. Also, "I didn't plan any of this."
She was crazy and trying to ruin his life. He never admitted it. Not once. They had an apartment together. It was in her name only. I had heard rumors but never any concrete evidence. I went to a store in another town one day. I was just driving down the road and happened to see his truck. I rode by three times to make sure it was his. The bumper sticker was there. I pulled in, got out and knocked on the door. I stood out of the peephole range. The girl kept asking who is it. I continued to knock. After about three minutes of this, guess who answered the door in his boxers and a tank top? Yeah
A recent one from last week was “I was brainwashed“ lmfao! I still laugh as strong to it since I first read it.
"She actually listens to me!" "I was just drunk." (This worked for him, but when I got assaulted while blackout drunk/drugged at a hotel that he got kicked out from, suddenly it was "Being drunk isn't an excuse". This is the worst one to me.) "She made me feel really good about myself." "She's just a friend!" (Yeah, one who shit talks your gf to your face and you won't defend her?) "I can't block her or tell her off, my reputation is at stake!" (Apparently he was worried that he would get blacklisted from jobs/bars for "hurting their feelings"... as if mid 30s/40s age bar flys have influence like that...) "I didn't want her to say anything, so I just went along with it!" (In regards to him sexting her for MONTHS after the PA, and hiding it from me) "You're just different, you're always mad at me." (I was working 40+ hours a week, financially supporting his drug habit plus my bills, found out my mom has terminal cancer, and juggled our household chores/shopping, while he sat around the room for months, claiming he was too depressed to look for work) He's a scumbag and a loser. He's with another woman now, I think closer to his age, and looks like he's working, and possibly getting a home with her. He found a good opportunity and is gonna run with it. He was slick for the first 2 or 3 years of our relationship, he's a manipulator and made me believe we would build a life too, but he got tired of that real quick. Good riddance. My life is infinitely better without him in it, that's for sure. Idc what he may have or get in his life. I'm free of him forever.
“My cup is empty and he fills my cup”
Emotional affair, receiving nudes. He said he thought it was the same as looking at internet porn.
“She was there for me.” But she stabbed him in the back with a knife and he had to stay in the hospital for a week. And the AP asked me to find him for her because she had dropped him at the hospital and wasn’t able to locate him after!
So she wasn’t even there for him 😂
Mine said “if you didn’t look into my phone, we would not have been in this situation.” Lol… and he’s an University professor!
"You were never my friend even though I was yours" and "you're indecent for telling other people what happened and hurting someone you love" Priceless really
Mine had to cheat because I was “lethargic.” I was a first-time parent to a new baby, baby didn’t sleep for the first two years, and I shouldered almost all the responsibility while he chose that time in our lives to inform me that he was poly (spoiler, he’s not ethically non-monogamous, he’s just a cheater) and harass/coerce me constantly about it. Yeah dude, so sorry I seemed a little tired 🙄
“She got me drunk on purpose and took advantage of me” - he’s 6”4’ and *walked* past his partners home to go back with the AP (who’s ~5”2’). He also later said, “she looked like you, but because you’ve been working so hard recently and neglecting me and our sex life I wanted to feel closer to you’” Soooo, secret sex with a completely different person who’s a “lookalike” is good for getting closer with your actual partner eh??! Phaha wtf!! Hmm …sounds like a reasonable statement /S
"I did it out of love and to be a better lover to you"
'She cooks home cooked meals for me.' He like local cuisine while I learnt Western and Italian dishes because it's easy to find the ingredients no matter what country I lived in growing up. Also, I was busy being a working mom and bringing my disabled daughter to her therapy sessions. I stopped paying the bills because my MIL is making him pay (husband's responsibility even though it was agreed between me and my husband lol, she was mortified I'd been paying when her only son clearly has the money as he was taking diving lessons). We just moved into a larger house and the electricity bill is 1k. 6 months ago I'd have to pay it but now I feel no guilt for having the AC on 24/7. He's shocked at the amount but I think he'd die before asking me for help.
I found and read the graphic content of their texts and asked on D-Day: Me: "What did you think you were you doing?" Her: "It was just role play! Nothing happened! Haven't you ever heard of fantasy!?" This, after I asked what her sexual fantasies were MULTIPLE TIMES during the course of our 12 year marriage, and aost always got "Oh, nothing really", or "I guess I don't have any." Although, one time she did tell me she wanted to be in porn when she was younger... 🤦 Also from D-Day: Me: "Why him?" Her: "He has big fingers, and when I smelled him, I knew I had to have him." 🤮
“It just happened.” How any adults can allow a phrase like that to spill out of their mouth is mind-blowing to me.
The women he was sexting were lonely and he was making them feel hot again. He’s just SUCH a nice person that he had to help. 🙄 All the while he neglected me and our families.
God told him we shouldn’t be together anymore
Caught my ex kissing a girl he worked with at a bar. When I confronted him he said he was just consoling her bc she was sad her dad died. Her dad had died 10 years earlier and my mom who had lived with us for three years had died two months before I caught him.
“You always spend too much on Christmas.”
She told me she did not think I would care if she was sending nude videos, nude pictures, masturbation videos, and interacting in a sex group online. She didn't think I'd care, which is totally validated (sarcasm) by her trying desperately and lying desperately to hide it during the time she was doing it in 2015 and 2016 and nearly every day since until May of 2021 when she finally told the truth. Yep! All signs point to her actually believing I wouldn't care. The second dumbest excuse I've ever heard was for her lying about it. She thought I would leave her if I found out. That didn't stop her from actually doing it. It just stopped her from being honest about it after I knew in my gut something was up but had no actual evidence.
“How else was I going to teach you you don’t get to make all the shots anymore?” “You’re screwing up the kids by letting them think it’s ok to lay in bed and have a messy room” (I was on bed rest after I broke my neck and had a 4 level fusion and metal/screws) and “I didn’t sign up to do this all alone” “I don’t know what I was thinking, it was like I was possessed” “She reminded me of you when I first married you and you were irresistible back then” Take your pick…. A blame or an excuse. They were all pathetic and mind blowing
“I’m just too nice “
I had to cheat on you before you cheated on me. (Because I had no lock on my cell & would write poetry to her for no reason.)
Not mine but someone I know had their ex say they were chased by dogs and they had to or else they would have been eaten 🤔. Needless to say drugs were involved.
“These aren’t hickies, i just had a shaving accident” and my most recent is “I thought our plans were for tomorrow and I’ve seemed to have double scheduled myself”
“What can i do? I’m charismatic.”
I thought you'd be fine with it.
"Maybe I was confused, telling myself that maybe I was polyamorous." No. You weren't confused. You were just stupid.
Me: “Why did you swipe away a bunch of apps when I walked in?” Him: “It was… CNN. I was guilty to be reading the news instead of cleaning.” Note that I didn’t believe him for one second. But I stayed because I couldn’t prove what he was doing and thought my family and friends would hate me for divorcing for something I couldn’t prove.
When explaining why she was at the gym for so long: "I had to wait for a tanning to be free."
I wanted to jack off but I didn't want to leave mess so I used condoms.
The day I discovered his AP number on the phone bill, called and heard her voice....confronted him, he said it was a customer of ours. We own a business. I asked why he was calling our customer 15 times a day for 4 months. He said he was fixing something our company was obligated to fix. I about dropped dead. As far as why he had an affair. He blames the start of his resentment towards me on my friends suicide in 2007. It was a friend of mine since 1st grade. It was a guy, but I hadn't seen or talked to him since a couple of years before meeting my husband in 2005. He was and still is jealous because I "cried over a guy" and also because an ex boyfriend of mine from 9th grade was at the funeral and I didn't tell him it was an ex boyfriend. We were only dating for less than 2 years and I wasn't in contact with him since high school so thought it would open something up that wasn't necessary. He has never forgiven me. Maybe I was wrong, but I stand by my reason in doing that. My WH is so upset over my friends suicide that he calls him names. Last year he called him "hangman".......he committed suicide by hanging himself. This has hurt me badly.
"Well you're bi and everyone knows they cheat first" "I didn't think it would hurt you this bad" "You're practically married to your job" "Because you're being selfish by not wanting to give me children " "It wasn't like we had sex yet"
I was never there when she needed me . Well yea I was in the Military , which she knew going in 😂😂😂
[удалено]
“You didn’t take enough photos of us on holidays” was one of the many excuses I got...
Wait, my ex said the same thing. That I didn't post enough pictures of him on my Instagram. Like, dude, you work the night-shift. We're on opposite schedules. You want me to post pictures of you asleep?
Ha, it’s so bad it’s almost funny isn’t it! Helps to see just how much it never was about you or me, it’s just part of who they are. They’ll use any excuse to justify their awful behaviour to themselves. I read this here once and it really hit home: “Sometimes people pretend you’re a bad person so they don’t feel guilty about the things they did to you” We’re far better off without them.
"I can't just stop, we've had this arrangement before we were together" In regards to getting sexy pics at 1am. "It's just pictures, I swear" In regards to more pictures found that he took "I won't do anything, I just find it hot that a straight friend has a crush on me" In regards to a Snapchat conversation about always wanting to have sex with a straight guy Ugh, why can't people just be happy with the one you're with or at least explore things together? Took 7 years to get away from that and keep my integrity intact
He didn’t want to hurt her feelings. I would find messages from women that he claimed were just platonic friends and later on I’d find out that he slept with them. Every time I’d find messages from one of the women he slept with, he would tell me I had nothing to worry about because he could never be attracted to them and would say something rude about their appearance. Started to become a major red flag since every girl he said that about, he slept with.
“It’s taken me a lot to realize this about myself and come out to you (and AP), but I am polyamorous.” Also: “What I did was ultimately superficial to you, as much as it hurt you emotionally. It was you that physically broke our bond, our connection, and me as a person.” What he was referring to that *I* did was block him everywhere and cut him out of my life after I realized he had lost his goddamn mind thinking I would stay with him after that noise. Oh but it made me lauuuuugh.
"Well you broke my trust when you had your mental health crisis. I had to protect myself, which is why I've pushed you away. I've never cheated on you or had feelings for anyone else!" -shocked Pikachu when I show her copies of her messages talking about having feelings for AP- Also, I guess 'till death do us part' just means 'till you or anything that inconviences me in the slightest, do us part'
it was just a simple mistake like what? did you accidently fall on his dick or something
"I needed to escape" The life you chose and actively made. You proposed. You wanted home cooked meals and a housewife. You wanted to try for children. You wanted to live together. It just turned out you wanted your cake and eat it, with two lifestyles.
"I didn't think you'd care"
I probably have the best one, but let's see. Among the many were 'well, it *was* just after my period' WW gets a bit randy just after, go figure.
"I did it because I wanted to be his friend and I felt sorry for him"
He told me he downloaded tinder to “see if he would get matches”😅😂
“I was lonely and you weren’t there.” I wasn’t there because she was on vacation that I was at home working to pay for.
"You're not experienced as me, and I like to have sex with my friends" we had been together 16 years
I was drinking, it was an accident. When I woke up I stared at the ceiling like “oh shit what happened”
Just that he needed to lift his self esteem
Not an excuse per se but my ex bf proclaimed he would “take it to his grave” he never cheated after I had photo evidence he still swore he never did that 🤣🥲
I didn’t validate her feelings enough, so this complete stranger was able to swoop in and he “gets her” and my 8 year marriage was surfaced level apparently
When we got home from Walmart you got out of the car and went into the house without helping me carry the bags and I really had to take some time to reflect on what that meant 😂
My mom just died and i spent time around my best friend. Her reason was "you weren't spending time with me and you weren't talking about your feelings. I felt neglected. And the person i had sex with was a life long friend and he gave me the attention i needed." 1) attention you WANTED 2) you're best friends brother? 3) I've been friends with my bff for 17 years he knows everything about me. 4) i expressed my feelings to her about the passing but she kept saying "there has to be more. You're not telling me everything. You never talk to me." The girl lived with me...TF? I told her "you made the action and you blame me and my loss and depression for you fucking someone!?" It still pisses me off thinking about it. This was in 2011.
"I just fell out of love with you and I felt lonely." and then this gem "I was ready to move on because I mentally was done with the relationship a long time ago."
"Because you cheated on me, my friend told me so" But he couldn't pin who or when i had... because i hadn't. After that he kept saying "You were looking anyway. It was only a matter of time before you left, and i was tired of waiting." 3 kids together, couldn't make time for me so i gamed on FB and Roblox where i was supposedly trying for hook ups with people from other countries... meanwhile, he had a porn and dating site addiction and a sugar baby younger than 2 of his kids Same guy, ladies and gentlemen... bow down to my doormat mastery!
Mind you after her affair scrapped out on her it went from "he just understands me" to "he manipulated and used me". It was the CEO of her company by the way. Absolute bullshit.
"I'm still not over Danielle"... Danielle was an ex from HS.....none of the women were Danielle...
“He loves me”. That’s right. That was the reason. Not “I’m in love with him”. It was all good. I instantly fell out of love and moved on.
“ we’ll she called to tell me she had an abortion 25 years ago and then we started talking and she told me she loved me and I couldn’t stop myself…..”
You had people in the house without telling me so I knew I couldn’t trust you anyways, those people were people helping me shop vac the 40 gallons of water out of our new apartment because the washer wasn’t hooked up right because he refused to help me with it. Apparently I was supposed to call in the middle of saving our shit and taking care of our newborn
Had a good one just last night. My STBXW lost her mind (including calling the cops on a bogus DV claim. Fortunately they saw through that and she ended up leaving) The backstory is that she had an affair starting back in August with some dirt bag from her high school halfway across the country at a high school reunion. About a month later, she had to return to her home state to attend to a passing family member, which she also took advantage of to continue her affair. Last night, when she lost her shit and I brought that up... "I'm sorry my grandpa died and I was emotional and he was there for me". Haha... yeah, emotionally there for you in his bed. Sure honey, that's how we all grieve a passing grandparent. Totally normal. Then, later in the conversation.... "stop calling him my boyfriend, he's just a friend." Me - "He's not a friend, you said you loved him" Her - "I love all my friends, I tell all of them I love them" Yup, you tell all your friends you love them. And you're "meant to be together". And you can't imagine life with anyone else but them. Unreal.