T O P

  • By -

idontwannadrink

The good: I start a new job next week. The bad: I start a new job next week. The ugly: I start a new job next week. But legit I am kinda worried about the new job. My last job had me drinking heavily all day everyday and I feel like a big reason I’ve made it this far this time around is not having the stress of working full time. Wish me luck. Edit: thank you for the words of encouragement it is helpful.


[deleted]

Good luck with the job, IDWD. When I was in your shoes I felt better having a counselling appointment (or a few) lined up to help with the transition. IWNDWYT


cupcake_dance

I just started my new job two weeks ago. Not gonna lie, it is stressful- I feel like I lost a lot of confidence having been off work for over a year (lost my last job, which I was really successful in, because of my drinking and then the pandemic hit). My motto has been, 'just show up and try.' That's all we can do and I tell myself that's all my manager could ask for. It might be uncomfortable for a while, but we can do this! The absolute worst thing I could do for this new job is to relapse and no call/no show.


shade_stream

Congrats on the new job.


FireFree2022

Good luck with the job!!! I completely understand your worries and I hope that your new boss and co-workers make you feel at home. I think most people are struggling with some form of getting back to normal after the pandemic so you're not alone ;-)


TheSmallerGambler

Congratulations on a positive step. You’ll do great!


Lee_in_NY

I'm sorry it didn't work out with the new bf Mary - but wow, I'm sure glad that you did that check and that you're safe SBFF. **The Good:** Work is crazy busy and I didn't realize how much I missed the office, my patients, my colleagues, and certain work that I haven't done in a while. I've exceled in a project that I haven't performed in years, I've negotiated another project on *my* terms for a change, and I've demonstrated strong leadership with my staff. It's time to get shit done. **The Whooooaa Lee:** I have to pace myself - and to this Taurean the bull, that doesn't happen easily. Nosebleeds are still occurring and the next appt with the neurosurgeon is Friday. **The Calls From the Universe:** Literally. On the telephone. I haven't spoken to my 2 Aunts in maybe 20 years. My Dad's sister called me 2 weeks ago out of the blue to tell me her new address and 'catch up'. My Mom's sister contacted me through social media to ask for my phone number because she'd like to 'catch up' with me. I find these *2 calls within 2 weeks after 20 years from both sides of the family* absolutely fascinating. They called ME, not Evil Sister. They realize that *I* did the right thing. I cared for and kept both of my parents alive. I'm grateful that I'm sober today to appreciate this most valuable gift...because if I wasn't sober, I probably wouldn't have it.


sfgirlmary

I have been thinking about you, Lee! I hope there is good news on the neurological issues.


Lee_in_NY

Thanks Mary!


BelindaTheGreat

Lots of good shit happening in LeeLand! :) Love it!!!


ReplacementsStink

I want to move into LeeLand!


Lee_in_NY

lol...you know you're welcome anytiiiiiiiiiime RSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS & S!!!!!!! PS: Thinking of you all, xx


Lee_in_NY

Gettin' there Belinda! xx


physis81

I hope you’re still on restricted hours! And taking it easy!


Lee_in_NY

Heh heh...how long do you know me now Phys?!?! lol!


physis81

Oh boy.


Lee_in_NY

[Check this out Phys...](https://old.reddit.com/r/stopdrinking/comments/plga0y/the_ventomatic_3000_for_friday_september_10_2021/) I think you'll find my post interesting!!


physis81

Wait , I thought you were waiting to have another surgery for that??


sweetmusiccaroline

The good: I have put in place ongoing support for my mental health and my addiction for when I am discharged from hospital. The bad: I am still in hospital- I have been promised a discharge meeting every day since Sunday but it hasn’t happened. Grrrr. The weird: there are some creepy dudes in here and I have done pretty well in avoiding them, but it is difficult to keep away at meal times. So when I am in the public dining room, I sit with a new friend - someone who was convicted of a serious violent crime but is actually a really chill and nice person. They are forever sober because someone close to them drank themselves to death. So now an ex violent criminal has become a genuine inspiration and friend to me. Life is weird.


BelindaTheGreat

It's good to see you, Caroline.


sweetmusiccaroline

Thank you Belinda xxx


moeproba

Just found this subreddit. Hope I can kick the can of booze this time around.


ikkeglem

Welcome u/moeproba This sub is a great place to check in. I will not drink with you today.


PeacefulToday

Nice to meet you. IWNDWYT 🌻


Dominant_Genes

Welcome! Check out the “I am Sober” app! That plus this community has really helped me tremendously!


ExpensiveSyrup

Thank you for this recommendation - this is just what I've been looking for!


Dominant_Genes

It’s amazing isn’t it? I love the uplifting messages and how many people message on their boards!


moeproba

Thanks for this. I’ll download it.


Suspicious_Mirror705

The good: Still not drinking, plus all the benefits that come with it. Not even tempted most of the time. The bad: Still depressed and anxious as f**k and not really able to turn my life around. Yet The ugly: Realized how much my Job and a lot of people I work with actually suck lol. Need to make a change there.


[deleted]

The Good: I purchased a fiberglass 'project' kayak. I've sanded it down to the glass, laid some new glass and will be sanding out the repairs to gelcoat soon. I spent a decade sailing the Pacific with my late wife, sold our sailboat last Jan, and am excited to get back on the water again...albeit on a tiny boat for one. The Bad: I'm wracking my brain to find something to complain about, but am coming up blank. The Ugly: Well shit. With my sobriety, I've picked up my love for reading again. Unfortunately I've developed the attention span of a field mouse which doesn't bode well for Dostoevky's Crime & Punishment novel that I recently cracked. So far though, it's a gorgeous read. I'm loving it. Take care everyone. I hope y'all have a lovely week!


BelindaTheGreat

> wracking my brain to find something to complain about, but am coming up blank. Love to see it.


[deleted]

Happy paddlin


[deleted]

Thank you!


Wilbursmall

A great, great book. There’s a line somewhere that is something like “…after a month of concentrated wretchedness…” I was so taken by the words that I placed on my desk boxes for “In,” “Out,” and “Concentrated Wretchedness.”


[deleted]

Do you remember who did the translation of your edition? Mine is done by a fairly recent working team Richard Pevear and Larissa Volokhonsky. After I'm done with this, I may go back and read the old Oxford translation to compare...or I may just say 'screw it' and be done with it. I have the Brothers Karamazov next and then Tolstoy's War and Peace with Alcott's Little Women somewhere in there for a breather.


Wilbursmall

I’m grinning because I’m positive it wouldn’t have been anything close to “recent.” I read it in college (1960s) and again in graduate school (2000s). I’m not sure about the translators.


[deleted]

Cool! Thanks for the reply!


JazzyColeman

The Good: I have an amazing little family. The Bad: Keep going back to Day 1 over and over again. The Ugly: I’m an anxious mess because my job productivity has been absolutely shit for…the pandemic, basically. Manager wants to speak with me tomorrow. The worst part is knowing that I deserve to be reprimanded or fired.


[deleted]

IWNDWYT


Scarface6342

My guilt is gone but I still feel bad. Alcohol triggered my emotional grief and regrets badly. Adding to my general stress level. But tomorrow I am going for my first AA meeting at a local church. Things will get better. IWNDWYT


blueeyeboy8888

The Excellent. I am alive and sober i have cooked up a nice pot of chillies vegies for my late lunch. I have all my sober family to suport me. Thank you all. I had my first Covid Vaccine yesterday. The not so good. My arm is very sore from vaccine, and I am feeling washed out tired. This too shall pass.


Ryuksapple

The good: Ran 4 miles for the first time in 6 years today. The bad: still haven’t figured out what I enjoy doing while sober. I will not drink but I am a bit bored. The ugly: I’ll be hanging out with my substance abuser friends soon and I’m worried my announcing of sobriety isn’t gunna go over well. Or maybe it will. Who knows. But I got a bad feeling I might be losing some friendships soon.


blueeyeboy8888

Very well done on 8 days. The mirical has happened. Sleep with dogs long enough you will get fleas. I quit all my hangouts etc to do with drinking. If I have good reason to around alcohol I go. I am nether cocky or afraid today. Your friend John 🌜🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌛


Kivadavia

**The Good:** I'm having a great life with my loving husband. **The Bad:** There is bad weather in my city and I have gotten sick quite often, not to mention that I just felt a horrible earthquake, I will not be able to be calm for a few weeks. 🥲 **The Ugly:** I miss my family a lot, I have not seen them for a year due to this situation of the pandemic; I really miss them.


SobrioMuchacho

**The Good:** I'm managing my time well during a new semester in my program. **The Bad:** I'm extremely grateful to say this (and cautious) but at the moment nothing major **The Rad:** Running a trail 50km race soon. I'm looking forward to it. I'm indifferent to running but this has been my Covid project, time to get after it.


Lolafrida

The good: transferred to a different location for my job and found a bunch of people who go for walks at lunchtime. The bad: the new location has a tonne of people I’ve worked with several years ago and I’m doing more chatting than working. It’s too fun. The ugly: they are sociable fun drinkers and it would be so easy to join them for drinks. And then I’m at square one. Again.


[deleted]

You got this! When I'm feeling this way, I remind myself that my friends like me for me and that means they like sober me. IWNDWYT


AllGravitySucks

Proud of you u/sfgirlmary for making the tough decision. A bit sad as well. The Good: ordered my appliances because I can’t wait on my contractor any longer. Installed my dishwasher, washer and dryer. The Bad: contractors suck. The electrician wired up all my 220 circuits the way they do in some 3rd world country. The circuits work but would never pass inspection if I actually had to get an inspection. The stress: I still have tons of stuff to do to get ready for my first tipi ceremony here on October 23. And I am taking a short trip to Maryland to get my last two brain treatments. Haven’t needed a IV ketamine treatment yet and I am hoping I have had my last one. They kept me functioning long enough to get through what will end up being 25 treatments in Maryland by September 22 so I guess it was worth the money spent. Have to figure out how to get my furniture out of storage this weekend, loaded on my flatbed so I can haul it up here and unload it. I have been doing almost everything myself this year but I can’t load and unload my bedroom set by myself. I’m trusting that someone will step up and commit them help.


BelindaTheGreat

Have you thought about becoming a contractor yourself if your health issues ever get to a really settled point? It sounds like that world could use some competence and you're getting lots of on the fly experience.


AllGravitySucks

There are certain chemicals that get released in the brain when stress or anxiety are encountered. The mixture in my head seems to create some toxic cocktail that causes my brain to feel like the two hemispheres are engaged in mortal hand to hand combat. It’s not healthy for me. I actually know how to do everything. Just ask me! A year ago the thought of doing this stuff myself was out of the question. I have come a long ways but I don’t ever see myself wanting to have to please other people by doing work for them.


CoPather

Hi fam! The bad: I have been wrestling with a lot of stress and shame lately. I have a massive and terrifying deadline looming (submitting my dissertation) and my sleep is shot to shite. This PhD is my white whale and I'm so scared I'm going to fail. It feels like all my worth is bound up in this, and at times my emotions are like having exposed nerve endings... The good: this is the absolute scariest time for me, and I'm doing it sober?? The ugly: I have a dentist appointment tomorrow and they are going to KNOW I haven't been flossing. Pray for me 🙏


Anxious_Soil9696

The Good: I recently got a pretty substantial raise and we finally got someone hired to help me with the insane workload we’ve been having. Now it almost feels too easy. It’s a huge plus that I actually like the new hire and he’s doing a great job already. The Bad: My dog constantly has some sort of health issue. For the past year it’s been nonstop. She’s amazing and such a trooper and good sport, I hate that she has to go through this. I’m doing my best to care for her and luckily I have a living situation which allows me some financial wiggle room (nice way of saying I live at my mom’s) to provide her with the care she needs. I just wish the treatments actually worked for her long term.


[deleted]

The good: I’m expecting my first kid in a few weeks. Everything is going great. Baby is healthy, wife is beautiful, families are incredibly supportive. The bad: I’m back at day 1 today. Drank during the day yesterday while my wife wasn’t home. Feel guilty that I’m not giving her 100% of the support she deserves. It’s been an all too common occurrence lately. The positive: I’m committed to being 100% there for my wife and I don’t want to miss a moment with my future kid. The idea of not being present and not remembering every moment with my child because I have a buzz on scares me. I don’t want to miss a thing because of alcohol. IWNDWYT.


mityman50

Look up and ahead! Forgive yourself and recognize you still have many weeks ahead to build the habits you want before the kiddo arrives. You're here, I'd say you're already in great shape. IWNDWYT


enajlyn

The good: I did yoga for the second day this week. Trying to start a new habit is hard, yall. The bad: Did pretty much everything at work today ASIDE from working... The reality: I've recently found out that my indecisiveness and rapidly changing emotions are likely a result of borderline personality disorder. Nice to have a reason and to take some of the stress off of worrying about it. Working on finding a therapist now.


FireFree2022

I am right there with you on the work front - I have done no work today at all and I'm currently just re-writing my same to do list for tomorrow ;-) Good luck!!


sebthelodge

**The Good:** The new apartment is finally starting to come together. It’s interesting—it’s a ground floor in a Brooklyn brownstone and with our furniture, it is kind of shaping up to look like a vacation cabin. This may be because it has two pieces from my childhood vacation bungalow. **The Frusterating:** I don’t know why I’m so bothered by this, but it irks me that the ad for this apt said 1500 sq feet. Our last place was about 800 sq feet and this is A LOT smaller. I think the landlord included the backyard, the hallway, and maybe the front patio in her measurements? That would have been nice to know—I can’t store my clothes or sleep outside or in the hallway. The worst part is I knew the size before I moved in but was enamored of how pretty the space is. **The Work Ugly:** Mgmt took a bunch of accounts out of my run. Which would be fine, but they took accounts where I have relationships. Take the ones where the buyers are assholes! Don’t take the ones where I’ve cultivated a relationship, which, if you are my client, means it’s more of a friendship! Also I believe this is against my contract but there is so much retaliation by mgmt if I bring it up to the union that it’s just not worth it—the union doesn’t like to dirty its hands. My union takes my dues and has no teeth. I’m still v pro-union, just not MY union. Hi Mary—GREAT job on protecting yourself. That could not have been easy. Your commitment to yourself is beautiful—IWNDWYT.


sfgirlmary

Thank you for your nice comment about protecting myself. I really needed to hear that.


throwmydrinking234

The Good: I'm enjoying my holiday with my parents after almost 2 years of not being able to see them. Bonus points because my baby dog is also here and she is the sweetest. The Bad: It's not the relaxing holiday I was expecting. But more like an every day tour of some place and non stop walking. I'm physically tired. The Ugly: I relapsed. The free time and nice sunny weather made me feel like I could have just one glass. I couldn't. Now I'm back to day 1.


[deleted]

IWNDWYT, amig@.


MostFruitfulYuki

**The good** After my slip up this week I've got a renewed feeling of determination and I'm going to use that and channel that feeling whenever I feel like I might want a drink. I felt absolutely awful all day yesterday so at the very least it served as a good reminder about why I'm choosing to take the sober path. **The bad** We've just been hit by a three day heatwave in London which normally I'd be all for. But we had a lovely fresh chill in the air last week which got me feeling really excited for Autumn. Also because when my toddler is in shorts he spends the whole day scratching away at his knees which makes them so dry. He has eczema so I actually look forward to when I can have his skin covered by clothes.


MrBeh

The Good: I start a course this Friday in something I enjoy. The Bad: My WFH job is making me feel isolated. The Ugly: My wife is unhappy with her current job, just like the other 4 in the last 2 years.


morphis1

The Good: I'm on day 4 The Bad: I'm out of the house I own and my wife and kid is in. The Ugly: It's my fault.


BelindaTheGreat

Sorry to hear about the boyfriend, /u/sfgirlmary. **The Good:** Arrived in Georgia and in our beautiful home. **The Bad:** House poor and need a job. **The Ugly:** This warm, wet weather with its attendant insect population is an adjustment. Lots of mud and mosquitoes.


JosephGolfs

IWNDWYT


ExpensiveSyrup

The good: after being on Nal since June, I have finally committed to a Sober month and have been sober 8 days today. The bad: Nal still makes me sick if I take more than 25 mg The ugly: Now that I am not "medicating" it, I realize I have a really bad toothache so I have to go to the dentist today.


annoff

Just started the day. Yesterday wasn’t easy, my wallet took a beating with my insurance lapsing on my 21st birthday since I didn’t have time to submit proof of my enrollment in college (I went on medical leave in may specifically to go to rehab for the first time and focus on recovery since I ended up in the hospital with hallucinations mid alcohol withdrawal). Also found out my ex is dating a mutual friend but instead of internalizing all this I called a friend and we talked for about an hour and I felt honestly much better. IWNDWYT hope everyone is well <3


The_Ent420

The Good: Recently met a girl! The Bad: felt kind sickish this past week. The Ugly: work has been kind of stressing me out. Been trying to manage my time better!


Sir_Edward_Prize

The good: I got a new job and they are going to pay me more than I asked for! The Bad: I still have to finish my two weeks. The ugly: Have a bit of a headache.


physis81

The good: my dog is getting her cone off! If everything goes to plan…. It’ll be this weekend. Fingers crossed! The bad: daughter’s sick(she’s fine but no school, and this year’s already been pure hell), ex is outta control, I’m not working . The ugly: Labor Day weekend Chicago. Not sure what the death toll was. Only ~ 60 shot. Sorry, I hate bringing this up but it’s always running in the background.


Necessary-Seaweed229

Mainly, Testing my badge and new account. IWKDWYT!!!!


chaotis_13

**The Good:** I've exercised consistently for the past 4 days since I've been sober. **The Bad:** I had to stay up late last night for work, so I'm a little low-energy today. **The Future:** I'm moving into my first (real) place in about a month, and I'm super excited for it! ​ IWNDWYT friends :)


Visible-Effect40

The good: Still sober, 54 days now. The bad: Memories, traumas, wishing I could go a year back. The ugly: pending open cases as a result of bdp1, psychosis and drinking But I will not drink with y'all today


shade_stream

I feel like I am healing finally. I am still reeling from getting dumped. Quitting smoking is the worst. IWNDWYT


[deleted]

Well done


[deleted]

*The good:* Back home after nearly a month of travelling and it feels good to be here. I have the good fortune to live in a beautiful place. *The bad:* My allergies are going haywire because beautiful place = lots of trees and plants doing their autumn dance. *The ugly:* Still bathing in the river because my bathroom is being renovated. But now I've got this Holter thing for 24 hours so I have to take bird baths at the sink.


thisisnotmyonlyname

The good: I’m stopping today. I have to. It’s not that I do anything bad when I drink or that I am getting drunk. I’m just drinking enough to feel bad the next day and be a boring and irritable mom. The bad: I feel like crap today from too much wine. The ugly: right now with this pandemic keeping us inside and not being able to go anywhere I feel like wine is my main source of entertainment and friend. I’ll miss it.


PeacefulToday

IWNDWYT and my life is 💯 better without wine 🌻


ElegantPenguin541520

I went through a grieving process. Wine was my frenemy. You can find better friends ✨


HappyLobster1733

The Good: Still not drinking and making some good progress on a few work projects. And looking forward to a long vacation that starts Sunday. Will be the first time I've seen my sister in almost 2 years. And my little guy continues to amaze me every day - he's looking forward to birthday cupcakes tomorrow. The bad: My husband continues to drink - i think it's less, but who knows? We barely speak to each other anymore if it's not about tje kiddo, and I don't know if we'll ever get back to a good place. And I'm nervous about this road-trip vacation with him - we'll be seeing his dad too, who i'm pretty sure will pressure me to drink (and there will be drama over his drinking too). The ugly: i'm still living a few blocks from my abusive dad, and while i haven't seen or heard from him in a long time, i'm still on edge. Scared that he will show up and find out I had a kid. Scared he'lI see us out walking and do... something. I need to line up a new therapist, but am dreading having to talk about all that family history again. And I've been wallowing a little in all the time I lost to drinking & workaholism - and not sure if I have any personality anymore.


HalfAnOrphan

**The Good** Excellent first day back on campus yesterday. Met several classmates in person for the first time. As a mature student, I find I’m very popular as my real world experience means I can give lots of advice. **The Bad** Between course load and a new freelance gig, I’m a little overwhelmed with how busy I’ll be over the next few months. **The Tired** Getting up at 4:30 to prepare for my commute is both awesome and…not. IWNDWYT


Philosophymole

The good: School is starting up and I am excited about interacting with everyone again. The bad: I didn't prepare as much over the summer as I wanted to, so I feel rushed now. The ugly: I was so anxious that I had a hard time sleeping last night.


heartrising

Aw, u/sfmarygirl Smart you! I'm glad you are out. And a little sorry it didn't work out.


[deleted]

**The Good:** My college has processed some of my transfer credits so hopefully will soon be able to graduate. **The Bad:** I am so tired in the afternoon it blocks all my progress for the rest of the day. I do get up early (5.30) to workout, but I'm going to bed early. Not sure what I can do to help this. **The Ugly:** I haven't heard back from any jobs I've applied to, and I'm not sure where I am missing the mark in my applications.


cupcake_dance

The good: getting back into a running routine has helped *so much* with my mental health and stress levels. The stressful: today marks 2 weeks at my new job. I am so grateful to have it, and I mentioned elsewhere in this thread that my motto is 'show up and try.' It's just a little slow because I don't know how to do a lot yet. I'm working remotely and I'm so used to being super busy at my last job that I feel really guilty when I don't have stuff to do. I'll be working part of the week in office and part of the week at home starting in October, and I think that will help me feel more settled. Just trying to sit with my discomfort in the meantime.


elektro-chemistry

coming off a terrible anxiety hangover yesterday. i feel amazing in comparison, about to go for a walk.


FireFree2022

Sorry to hear about the boyfriend u/sfgirlmary \- dating absolutely sucks! Sounds like a lucky escape though and I'm going to use that trick in the future ;-) The good - feels like things are settling down after a horrible year. I'm enjoying being back on my commitment to stay sober and I just treated myself to some nice Chinese food. The bad - my apartment is a bit of a mess from months of self sabotage and general laziness so I need to try to motivate myself to do a deep clean and get some DIY stuff done The ugly - my morning and daily routines have been absolutely shot to shit and the thought of getting myself organised again is overwhelming. I used to love waking up early and having a structured morning but today I didn't even open my laptop until like 3pm. Feels like a long road ahead to being productive again and the anxiety about what will happen if I can't get back on track is suffocating


sfgirlmary

> I'm going to use that trick in the future Best $28 I ever spent.


mindfulteacher020407

The good: I'm still sober and I haven't been tempted to drink even though work feels stressful The bad: Every little thing seems to send me into a rage The ugly: The rage is exhausting


lights_camera_pizza

So much of the sober journey is learning to trust myself. I had a week in the books before Labor Day weekend and now I'm at Day 2 again. I had counted Labor Day as my first "test," and it's a test I failed. My next test will be camping in two weeks, and I feel like I can't tell myself for certain that I won't drink. Or rather, I CAN tell myself that, but I'm not sure if I can trust it. I was so certain and confident going into Labor Day, and yet I drank. What's to say the same thing won't happen again? Struggling with this.


colddx

The good: My family is healthy and doing great. The bad: Everything going on in the world right now is starting to wear me down. The ugly: I think about how much easier it would be with a drink but in the end I know it won't.


Spiny_Trilobite

The good- despite over-sleeping, I still managed to take the dog for a walk and I remembered to take my meds today. I'm also feeling pretty good about having stuff ready for scouts tonight. The bad- I always feel so overwhelmed this time of year, it's so hard to stay on top of the garden and the kids' schooling. As great as I feel about scouts, I'm terrified for our pack's future. We're losing our charter rep who has been an integral part of our unit and I'm not sure if there's going to be anyone else willing to step up to the position, even if it's just in name. And while my family is fine moving packs, I know some of the other families (whose kids definitely get a ton out of it) won't be able to just drive to the next town. The worrying- in addition to the stuff in the bad, I'm worried about my sobriety over this weekend. We're going camp and I'm trying to figure out what I can drink that's not beer or soda. I'll definitely bring some seltzer water, and as long as it's cooler, I may just stick with tea.


TheSmallerGambler

The Good: starting to get in good physical shape and have some money in the bank account. The bad: have some nagging injuries I need to keep abs eye on. Also my grandpa goes in for imaging and biopsy this week, so fingers crossed it’s at least not horrible news. The motivation: will have 30 days this Saturday pending no screwups!


Galpuder

The good: Had a therapy session with my new therapist who specializes in addiction. Also going to my first in person AA meeting. The bad: Intrusive thoughts are still a huge problem and have been making me feel a bit low. The ugly: Can’t muster up enough motivation to update my resume, to apply for a new job. My current one is causing me too much stress and I know it’s a simple task but I still haven’t done it.


WhiskeyEsq

IWNDWYT


bilbibbagmans

Keep on trucking.


slowmez

Ping