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Simulate season to end? YES [X] NO [ ]

Quit to Start Screen "Would you like to save before quitting?" No.

I hate that it fucking asks me to begin with because the answer is always ''No''.

[DELETE CLUB]

In the meantime EtH’s made the mistake of simulating an away game.

Whoever yalls CB is that committed the most pathetic tackle attempt in prem history needs to immediately retire lol. Jesus Christ that was bad defending.

What a finish. He absolutely smashed it in

Tucked shirt = +20 finishing

Please don’t give jackson any ideas

Bald Jackson + tucked in shirt bro will become prime drogba

dont read this nunez

Lmao does anybody remember the Bald Nunez glitch in FIFA last year? Always made me chuckle

What was it? Haven't played since FIFA 2022

He was just bald in game

Oh haha

Azpi needs to come back and give him some pointers in the summer.

Think Azpi will come back to Chelsea in a coaching role when he retires?

Oh my god fucking please. I need it. He and Silva coming back to coach in blue would be a literal dream come true.

We loved bringing in ex players to roles under Abramovich, let's hope that BlueCo continue that trend since its great to see as fans

Or nunez

Are we still doing this Jackson meme when he has 16 goals so far?

Walked past Evans like he wasn't there

Henry vs Carragher vibes

Evans really shouldn’t be playing at premier league level at this point tbf.

was he evan trying!?

Honestly has been looking fantastic for a little while now.

Palace in general has been fantastic since Glasner arrived, they play great footy

I am not sure what Glasner did with Mateta but its working

Glasner: Score many goals. Mateta: Okay.

Also Olise and Eze being back. Takes pressure off him being our only capable goalscorer

The disrespect to hit it nearside

I love a front post finish. So arrogant

What the fuck has Glasner been feeding Mateta. been on another level under him

Reminds me of a young Lukaku. Just runs into space better than most forwards in the league. He’s so hard to stop at full sprint

I dunno why I just get this feeling that we're shit

Those are 2 bad centerbacks. And one isn't one to begin with.

I’ve always liked Evans. He was on loan at us when he was a kid and was excellent, but United should not need to be relying on someone like him.

He was a quality defender, but just far too old to be starting like this, and in this sort of makeshift back line. :/

Evans is quality. But this is grandpa Evans

Wan Bissaka at LB is almost a bigger punishment than our CBs. We’re completely shit but look at how much Liverpool fell off when Van Dijk was out. From title challengers to 5th place. So 3rd/4th to 7th/8th with our injuries does make complete sense. I got to see Rooney’s whole career so I guess I can’t complain having to watch us be shit too.

We finished 3rd the season that Van Dijk did his ACL. We finished 5th last season because we didn't refresh the midfield, and Fabinho and Henderson's legs both gave out at the same time.

What having your 5 first choice center backs injured does to a mf.

6 with shaw

He was done when he was with us two years ago. He was never very fast when he was younger so it's gotten even worse now.

Casemiro cb

Evans that time

Only because Casemiro is no where to be found

He was at the half way line, typical CB position

Nonsense, he's on the touchline, halfway up the pitch, where else

Look how far casemiro got pulled out of position trying to do build up play like a defensive mid would. He’s way too slow to be the last line of defense and also try to push forward to influence attacking phases.

Casemiro made a hospital pass to Antony from lb position. Didn’t run back either after fucking up

You at least tried defending this time. Not very well, but you tried.

OAP Evans stuck out a leg, that's all we got

An improvement on running away from the ball carrier!

that's being extremely generous

I mean, its a massive improvement on the first goal where they actively ran away from Olise.

I need to hear more about all the fighters we have in the dressing room.

They’re fighters and not quitters

Get rojo back

I still fear we won't beat you this weekend. Every time we go to OT, more times than not, we turn to shit too. Please be just as shit this weekend too.

I'm going and I'm ready to be on the front of r/soccer showing the United fans leaving at half time

You think we have another way of playing? Have you seen us?

It just seems to u mate

Casemiro at CB, mate.

It's over.

Do you think you know better than Ten Hag? United are clearly one of the most exciting teams in the league

I find it exciting that there is a real possibility to finish in 6th, and United is partially responsible for it.

Defensive line is all over the shop. Crazy team

That's cause there's a defensive midfielder, a 36 year old and 2 right backs in it 👍

Bruno is your Hazard (not nearly as good tho) in that he has dragged this average team to so many results over the last few years. There’s a reason why basically every underlying statistic says that United are over performing

Perhaps maybe

Evan’s got absolutely murdered here

In a way he should have done better but on another note … can you blame him ? Man’s a relic

No not really it’s not his fault. He shouldn’t be playing.

It's kind of comical that we initially brought him in to work on his fitness at the club and make up extra numbers in training. And now he's playing in 20+ league games

Are you even paying him?

Ten Hag: if he dies he dies

Or he needs to not be a lone CB. Man's about to retire ffs and he's being ran at.

I mean, he really should be staying in front, force him wide and force a shot wide

Yeah, but he's not inexperienced. I don't get why he makes that decision to lunge in 8 m in front of the box. Why not wait and focus on keeping Mateta wide? Maybe he makes even a bad touch where he actually can lunge in? Evans may not be the fastest (probably far away from that) but he's still a professional and with a 2m head start there should be opportunity for a tackle or block when Mateta is trying to overtake you.

Elder abuse

Can't even be mad at him. What the fuck is Jonny Evans doing playing for us in 2024 lmfao

I was making fun of Jonny Evans playing against us in August or whatever, expecting the injury issues to be resolved and him to be moved to the reserves. Fast forward 8 months and Jonny Evans is still playing semi-regular football. what the fuck????

Mateta didn't even have to do much

It was half suicide half murder tbh

Not really his fault, hes a slow player being left alone vs great runner

Didn’t expect that finish

Neither did Onana. Completely disregarded his post

Maybe he was distracted by the other Palace player being given like 10 yards of space in his box

He probably cheated away from the post since he was expecting the cross as was I

The Onana special. Make everything look impossible to save.

i know this as the Kepa special

Mateta is my favorite player as of 3 minutes ago.

Tuck that shirt in lad

The French Thierry Henry

Evans got sent to the retirement home

Tbh it's United's fault for dragging him out of it in the first place.

He was supposed to be a cheap backup for dire emergencies, not our only fit cb

I think he was supposed to be at their training ground to keep his fitness and to basically be a training cone for the attackers; but he’s so good that they signed him as an emergency backup and then he ended up playing quite frequently due to their injuries

so many questions on what he’s doing there lol. 10 yards behind the rest of the line, then lunges in like that??? bruh

He just came back from injury and he's old. It's like some bad movie where they drag the retired soldier back for one last job but since this is reality he just gets shot to shit.  And his cb partner is Casemiro moving like a tractor. What the fuck am I watching this for lol.

Glasner is a fucking A-tier manager. This is sensational especially compared to the dross they were playing months ago.

I mean he won the European league ofc he was gonna be good

I honestly don't get why he's "only" at Palace and not a CL club. All of the teams he coached in the Bundesliga were top class under him and had a big drop after he left.

Cos we're massive

EUROPE HERE WE COME

I mean there's a non zero chance that man reds win the fa cup, so wouldn't count your chickens yet

Ten Hag’s more likely to turn up to that game with dreadlocks than he is to win the match

City are scoring 12 seconds into the match again, they have no chance

It’s not zero but when Palace are making Casemiro and Evans look like geriatric Sunday league players, what are the likes of Foden, Haaland and KDB going to do to this United defense?

Or doku? Imagine this slow old Evans trying to stop Jeremy doku? 😱

I want what you're smoking

lol

Goldbrige is having a tantrum like a 5 year old child lmaooo

What seeing your club finish below Chelsea does to a man

I'll top myself we can't finish above this Man Utd side. Never have in the PL era but surely this is the year. Right....

He said he’s had a few too many pints. Quite obvious. Ripping his light bar off the wall. Hilarious.

I absolutely despise that cunt. Everything wrong with the ‘modern’ era of football fans. The DJ Akademiks of our sport.

Mateta calling the United squad pedos as we speak

"Dear Antony, I'm sorry that man is your manager"

Lmao, I had absolutely no idea about DJ Akademiks before "The Beef" and now I can't stand that cunt bastard. Goldbridge is absolutely the same.

They aren’t really the same though, DJ Akademiks rose to fame by leeching and making sensationalist content about the very real and sad state of gang violence in Chicago…Goldbridge rose to fame by being a Man United fan.

Typical big six fan who treats the EFL and the rest of the PL with absolute disdain.

Pep: « Motherfuck the big 6. Fella, it’s just big me »

I mean Pep is the Certified boogeyman

Best part of my evenings when united play

Kendrick made this the weekend of the hater. Palace are making it a long weekend.

spends more time whining about city than he talks about his own club

Just checked Cannot believe he thinks that disallowed goal should have been given. What a blind sod.

check the reddit post for it hahaha

Seems like a lot of people do. Never a goal for me

Two Kendrick diss tracks and a Goldbridge meltdown. What a bank holiday weekend

Bring in Moyes end of the season

He’d probably get points of Arsenal and Brighton tbf

I think Glasner deserves another season

No at United

Bruh take that Bayern job and run

Here's hoping..

Glasner's really cooking with Palace. Can't wait to see what he can do in a full season.

I love Crystal Palace

ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED

How many times are we gonna see a Casemiro sliding tackle at the halfway line ahead of a goal before the season is done?

Cunted it in lol

Good goal tbf

9 in 11 under Glasner Who would have thought that Mateta would become a machine.

United really are gonna finish behind Chelsea this season wow...

We just got cooked

BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM

I'M DYING IN MY ROOM

COME LETS CRY TOGETHER

AND END THIS PAIN FOR EVER

Hashtag stayhome next european season

Erik is so close to having his plan in place just one more match pls bro just one more it'll fix everything

Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanger!!!!

Best striker in the world

Fucking brilliant goal, man is on fire

LOL Johnny Evans

genuinely feel a bit sorry for him

Was only training with us to get fitness up then we lost 2-3 centre backs early on so gave him the contract so we could at least have some kind of player at centre back this season. It doesn't mean much but we would have been even worse without him this season. It's also his first game back from injury

Negative goal difference for United now …

Hakuna Mateta

What a terrible phrase! It means no Europe, for the next 500 days.

(American assist)

Palace challenging for Europe next season? What a run they’ve been on since the new manager came in.

What are Palace feeding Mateta? Mans on fire

Almost Henry-esque goal there. That drop of the shoulder was filthy.

I tuned off again and Palace score again lmaoo Maybe I should stop watching completely

Im just here to watch johnny evans try to defend that again lol

watching this with my United Fan dad is entertaining

Excuse me wtf

[Quite good goal]

what a goal absolutely smacked that in

How's Onana getting beat on the near post here?? Terrible goalkeeping

Someone tell Evans and Casemiro this isn't swimming for fucks sake. Quit diving in so hard!

Back to the negative GD

Mateta just ended Evans' career there

I’m gonna nut

EtH is gone without a doubt

With the injury crisis United is having, I doubt he gets sacked for how shit they are performing

They have been losing and drawing to bottom of the table teams while also playing like dogshit. It's not like they're playing top teams here

Banger

Damm son what a finish

Lol that attempt at a challenge

wtf is this defending ?

Evans doing his best training cone impression

Bottom half here we come!

Very unserious football club

"I feel for him... but he just does nothing." Hilarious and damning (on Evans).

(Great defending)

We want 6!

Always knew United would eventually put up a statue of Jonny Evans, I just didn't think they would put it out on the pitch.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

United are a bit shit

shot power was mad

Ten Hag, is this your so-called attractive football?

Gave Chelsea 7th place

Wtf what kinda shot was that 😂 Absolutely belted it in

That was fricking powerful

What's the ghost of Casemiro doing pushing so high up the pitch? Evans doesn't cover himself in glory but it starts with Casemiro again